Schizophrenia Psychotic Break
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 2 ส.ค. 2022
- Hello, everyone! I'm Stephen. I am here with my dad today talking about my psychotic break and fall into schizophrenia. In the early months of 2012, at just 12 years of age, my world was irrevocably altered in a way I couldn't comprehend. I was thrust into a whirlwind of confusion, fear, and uncertainty as I experienced my first psychotic break, a terrifying gateway into my life-long journey with schizophrenia. Today, I stand a decade removed from that initial descent, living proof that while this condition may shape our paths, it does not define our end.
The Day Reality Fragmented: Understanding My Psychotic Break
When schizophrenia first intruded into my life, it manifested as a psychotic break-an intense period of disturbed thinking and emotional disconnect. I uttered words to my father that bore no resemblance to my true feelings, stating, "YOU'RE NOT MY DAD. THAT'S YOUR TITLE!" These words, devoid of emotion and delivered with a flat affect, signaled my fall into a reality dictated by schizophrenia-a reality that, ironically, felt unreal.
Reflecting on that period is akin to piecing together a puzzle with many parts missing or obscured. I don't remember the events or the several months that followed, a common consequence of acute psychotic episodes. It was a segment of my life that seemed to belong to someone else, narrated by those who witnessed my struggle.
Navigating a Misunderstood Condition: Life with Schizophrenia
Living with schizophrenia is not a uniform experience; it's a personal journey with many faces, dictated by an array of symptoms from delusions and hallucinations to deeply embedded social withdrawal. For me, the challenges extended beyond the symptoms, testing my resilience on multiple fronts.
Overcoming the stigma was my first battle. Misconceptions about schizophrenia abound, influenced by sensationalized portrayals that contribute to fear and discrimination. It became evident that to stride forward, I had to advocate for myself, correcting misinformation and humanizing the condition that people found so alien and daunting.
The next hurdle was forging a path to stability amidst fluctuating symptoms. This required an elaborate balancing act of medications, therapy sessions, and continuous learning to understand my triggers and limitations. My treatment was not about a cure-it was and still is about management and quality of life.
Resilience, Support, and the Journey Forward
There's no roadmap for living with schizophrenia; each person carves their path in their unique way. My trek was less about the destination and more about learning to weather the storms. I harnessed resilience, an attribute not summoned by sheer willpower but built brick by brick with each small victory and every setback.
Central to my stability has been an unyielding support system. Family, friends, and healthcare professionals created a safety net, catching me during my lowest points and elevating me during my successes. Their relentless belief in me often acted as a mirror, reflecting a strength I failed to see in myself.
Furthermore, I realized that hope was not a passive wish but an active part of my mental toolkit. Hope became a strategy, an approach to problem-solving. It taught me that setbacks were not dead ends but merely detours.
Reflections and the Road Ahead
Ten years post-diagnosis, I regard my journey with a realistic yet optimistic perspective. Schizophrenia did not steal my future; it merely rerouted my path. I've learned that surviving isn't just about breathing. It's about adapting, it's about finding joy in the small things, and it's about embracing a future unfettered by the constraints of my condition.
As I continue to navigate this journey, my mission transcends survival. I aim to thrive, contribute, and weave my narrative into the broader tapestry of mental health advocacy. By sharing my story, I hope to erode the barriers erected by stigma, illuminate the dark corners of schizophrenia with understanding and compassion, and instill hope in those who walk a similar path.
In conclusion, every step taken, every hurdle overcome, and every triumph, however small, marks an invaluable chapter in my ongoing journey. With schizophrenia, the music hasn't died; it's changed its rhythm. And to that new beat, I continue to move forward.
I appreciate this video. I'm sure it's not the easiest to make, but it helps to know how it all started. My son was diagnosed with schizoeffictive disorder at age 29. He is now 42, and still struggles with phycosis. It's a daily struggle for him and also us..his parents. He's living with us, as he's not able to live on his own. Your channel, and your attitude, Stephen, gives me hope for our son. Keep up what you're doing... You're making a difference!
Thank you! Your comment is very touching
@@SurvivingSchizophrenia Thank you so much Stephen. Your channel is so helpful and needed and so much appreciated.
I have schizophrenia too! I love your videos and I love how much you love your family and they’ love you! We are very blessed to have such good support
Thank you!
This was an extremely emotional session! However, it is an extraordinary and eye opening look into your personal journey through schizophrenia. This session allows all of us to go deeper and experience a small piece of your dad’s personal journey surviving your schizophrenia. It clearly shows how deep and undying a parent’s love can be in the face of adversity and the unknown.
I know both of your parents had to dig deep into their personal strength, courage, patience, fortitude, hope and prayers to survive this with you, Stephen. You are deeply loved by them, me and so many others! 🙌🏻❤️🙏
Thank you very much!
Every video you make - long or short - is making a difference in destigmatizing schizophrenia syndrome and other forms of neurodivergence, brings new hope to the possibility that my son will also awaken one day...
Thank you Lisa for your kind words!
Omg the hug at the end 😭 🥰 I love hearing your dads perspective as well. The first time a loved one is in psychos it is heart-renching and can be scary too. I remember when my best friend went through it for the first time. She became suspicious of me and said things I still remember. It broke my heart and I didn't know what to do. This was 7 years ago now and we're still best friends ❤ videos like this are so important.
Thank you. I respect that very much! Have a happy and healthy rest of your day!
You two deserve a lot more views. Your channel is really inspiring. keep it up please
Thank you very much!
Thank you for giving us a voice...there are many that can relate to your video...my family and loved ones are still struggling after 30 years years...I pray to God that he will send help
Thank you very much cloud cloud. Have a happy and healthy rest of your day!
Aww , Stephen Iove the connection you have with your Dad . I wish my Dad would understand me like your Dad. Thank you for making that video.
Thank you
My dad didn't understand my brothers illness. He wanted him to just pull himself together.
My brother was undergoing audio and visual hallucinations.
Hello Stephan, I just wanted to send my prayers to you and your parents. I know as a parent of a son who was diagnosed with schizophrenia it’s very hard on him but also hard for me and his dad. Thank you for sharing. 🙏🏻 your a very brave person and your video are very helpful.
Thank you very much!
My son was diagnosed of szchoperhnie in 2012 he was a very brilliant student but as parents we wanted the best for him and push him to do even better which eventually tringgerhim to go into mental distress and we are paying for it and living with guilt, after medication clozpine,lexpro he his very much normal and can think rationally , but did not finish his studies and currently just speding time with us intend to start online business for him cause he is not comfortable meeting people wish all the best and good health for both of you
Thank you for sharing your story. I wish you and your son the very best as well. Thank you again for joining my journey surviving schizophrenia. Have a happy and healthy rest of your day!
stephen you are lucky to have the support you have.i am blessed to have the same.
Thank you Jay! I am glad you have a good support system too
How brave of you both to be willing to share these vulnerable moments. Thank you.
I know that was hard for both of you. May God bring healing to all wounds.
These types of delusions are all to familiar. My son also has this illness. I know what you mean about the day the music died as my life turned on a dime. I am happy to say that my son is currently doing well, has him own place and a full time job. God bless you Stephen for sharing your life with us. It truly helps.
Thank you very much Tamara! I’m glad your son is doing well! Have a happy and healthy rest of your day!
Hi,
Happy to hear that you son doing well.
Could you tell me which medicin your son use ?
What kind of full time job?
You are so strong! I totally understand, this illness has brought me to my knees! But seen how Stephen has improved gives me so much hope 💙
Just go for right medicine ,which can keep you functional,take care be strong and do research on medicine and vitamin and key thing motivation and position thinking
See hv reply you di
Thank you Karina z!
Stephen your great at articulating your” experiences ,
Dad you should make a parent / caregiver channel !!
Thank you very much KMS! My Dad says thank you too! Have a happy and healthy rest of your day
Thank you for sharing this!
You’re welcome Karen! Have a happy and healthy rest of your day
I do wonder if this channel my be putting to much stress on Steven.
I know the feeling all too well. Years of watching my child suffer and is still suffering.
I am very sorry your son is suffering.
I’m very sorry. Sending hugs to you! As a society, we must find an effective treatment for psychosis and schizophrenia. My hope for Stephen’s channel is to help bring this about. We’ve suffered too long. We must push our medical community and governments for results. I’m a lawyer, not doctor, but this might be my life mission at this point in time. Take good care.
@@SchizophreniaSurvivor I don't think many people understand how this type of illness actually affects not only the patient but their family and community.
Awareness is definitely the first step in better care for psychotic disorders and other mental health disorders.
I really do enjoy watching these videos.
I do what I can to enlighten the community I live in . I'm in FW Texas, not a very great place to live if you have mental illness and require intensive treatment and safe housing etc.
My daughter has gone through just about every medication with poor results or severe allergic reactions.
We are now finally 15 yrs down the road and I just learned about Clazapine, not from a medical professional but from your videos.
How sad is that ? 15 years of psychosis almost completely unremitting.
Your videos give me a lot of hope for the future.
Thank you so much to you and to your son
I remember my son telling me he does not know if I am his mother he was very matter of fact I was like what? Our journey started at 16.
Thank you for sharing. I know it's hard for you to revisit some of the harder times and I see this in my son a lot when he's having a lucid moment, his shame and horror over what he's done. Hopefully he will come to be better at accepting that it's ok and there's no shame for being ill. But right now, he's at a hospital because of a psychotic break and I had to have the police here- last Monday. So this is only the start of perhaps getting to a better place. He refuses treatment. But this time he was placed on an involuntary hold and signed a settlement agreement, and he had to agree to 3 months supervision. So there is now something in place where if he refuses treatment after his release this coming Tuesday, we will be able to place him back in inpatient treatment against his will. I thank you for your bravery in discussing these issues, because at the start of this journey, it's been hard and care has been inconsistent and being able to find people like you has given me information AND hope for my son's future.
Thank you very much for sharing. I wish the very best for your son. And there is hope for the future.
Steven is fortunate to have a father like you . One can tell that you love him dearly and that you both are struggling to make sense of what has happened . It seems important to not lay blame at anyone’s feet when dealing with this illness . Wish the best for both of you .
sir, you are a great dad, thanks for bieng exemplary
My Dad says thanks very much!
We are also in So. Calif and my son’s psychotic break happened in the Fall of 2011. (He also developed a blood clotting disorder, out of the blue, a few months later). He had the same delusions early on. Insisting that my husband and I were not his parents. He would not address us by mom, dad, or even our names. He would just say”Hey” and tap on something to get our attention. 😢
Great video ☺️
Thank you!
My son with Schizophrenia has a similar complaint about his Dad, insisting he has “anger issues.” It’s almost comical, because my husband is the most amiable, laid back person ever! When pressed, the only example he can give of when Dad lost his temper is “Remember that time, when we were in the car (10 years ago) and we were late to a family celebration, and Dad said a curse word.”
A SUGGESTION for both of you - Schizophrenia is not a single diagnosis with a single track. To help other who see your videos - it is important to PUT YOUR AGE WHEN YOU ARE DESCRIBING what you experienced and what made sense. The cloinical details change a lot with age. AGE in Years and Months will help the viewers in making sense fo what you are sharing.
I have seen a few of your videos - but i am confused because it is almost impossible to make sense of what you are sharing without your age being known.
I have given you many thumbs up. KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK. Your KEEPING IT SINCERELY SIMPLE is likely to help many people. It is also better than many by MHP Mental Health Professionals and therapists.
In addition, I know you are not trained MHP - but try not to use Jargon like PSYCHOSIS to reference and explain psychosis.
I hope your channel becomes popular - but even more thay you enjoy your life.
Thank you so much! I very much appreciate your suggestions and support!
My 28 years old son still doesn’t recognise me as his mother. He says I am nothing to him. He tells this to everyone. He has been in psychosis since 19 years old. I asked his psychiatrist to try clozapine but no answer yet. Thank you for your videos.
Thank you for watching and sharing.
if you continue your current path without any doctor or therapist you will see schizophrenia from a distance. My opinion is that the only person who knows yourself it is you and not any doctor Do what you feel it right for you. I had a similar experience long time ago and your story brought me memories of my event. I do not have schizophrenia but I have anxiety and obsessing thoughts ocd.
Thank you
Another way to put it, if someone in your family saw an aging father and commented that he’s acting irrational to a third party (who is “responsible due to legal obligations” but not necessarily an expert on aging and behaviours or never experienced what the elder is going through)…
But because someone makes a comment that about “aging” (a construct much easier to gasp), then they locate you and lock you up for 10 days or a month or a year or years…
Because to someone younger, an elder acted irrationally (from their perspective; notice it was always centered on person only - no tolerance in asking for clarifications or open discussion when all parties are calm)
How would your perspective on life change after being locked up by “the best doctors” because they didn’t understand “aging” and you became victimized in a way
Happy Father’s Day to you BOTH 💙💙🙏
I have tears. I am so impressed by your courage and honesty in dealing with mental illness. I wish I could give you both a hug! I have an endogenous depression. My father started beating me when I was 3. He stopped when I was 15 because I fought back. In Germany, a doctor says I am bipolar and suffer from disassociation. You two are breaking the mold and tearing down the walls that stigma builds. Bless you both!
Thank you Jane for sharing your story. I am very sorry. I hope you have a happy and healthy rest of your day
I know this is from almost a year ago, but I'm catching up kind of... My husband had a stroke when we first moved in together and were dating for about 6 months. We didn't find out it was a stroke for all of labor day weekend. The ER was slammed with a bad car accident, and my now hubby was vomiting uncontrollably all weekend, until his stomach was empty. I remember he looked up at me, exhausted, as I held a vessel for him, and he said, "I don't think we're going to work out, I'm sorry" i was crushed...a nurse came over and i told him what he had said. The nurse wisely told me to forget what is said in the ER. He was correct; my now hubby has absolutely no memory of saying that. We've been together for over 20 years and are very much in love. 💕
I’m not completely sure making these videos about Stephen and his “unremembered” past during his psychotic break are very helpful to him. Maybe it helps his father but why grind the painful episodes in, incorrectly recalled or not.
Because it helps others as it helped me. They both are very good people. I thought that my son really hated me until I heard Stephen saying that it happened to him too.
Very nice video, very informative video God bless you all.
What does it look like ?
It’s too hard to explain. Thank you
@@SurvivingSchizophrenia so you’re meant to tell me it’s that hard to tell someone what you saw ? Is it that impossible to describe a color dimension now
I hope i do not offend you by saying this, but at times you can be a bit unsensitive. As with that time you told us, or Stephen, that "you didn't take him to the cliffs" when you learned that he was sick. That came across as unsensitive. It was a joke, but it just didn't sit right. But there's a chance to repair, just by saying "i said something stupid, im sorry". To retrospect on what one says is also a chance for personal growth. That is what is marvellous about your channel, you let the viewers take part in your lifes, genuinely. Don't change that to try to be perfect. No human is perfect.
🤝🤝🤝
I don't think you are seeing this realistically. I wonder if you ever considered that your son's condition is not "fixable"...hugs and kisses, love and therapy won't do it! I completely understand the frustration of anticipating a cure but maybe it would help if you both change your thinking and accept it as a lifelong condition.
I stopped watching around more than halfway through you reading your letter to your son’s psychiatrist. By no means intended to disrespect what you wrote or how you presented yourself (with emphasis on certain words when reading) but… not knowing how the video ends… I can just imagine the terrifying 10 days your son had to be locked up in a facility, being “treated by the best doctors” (in a given place) is b*llsh*t. People are often harmed in irreparable ways after experiencing a trauma of the “treatment” event - stripped away every bit of their worthiness of a human, being looked at like an object locked up, alienated from ones who he once trusted. All that from your own perception of “irrational” behaviours.
Perhaps there is merit in it, but bettter to communicate with him rather than an external party (who cares if they are so called professionals - if they have never gone through any conditions of their own - they will just be seeing any who is different as an “object”) who will just lock your son away and harm him in ways way more than you can imagine
Which I hope it wasn’t the case, but most of these situations, starts off with an lack of respect or lack of understanding of soneone who may experience or express things differently than you
Squidwkz Luke peanuts, you could domesticate one and take it to the guest house
He doesn't need a psychiatric doctor Dad, he needs God.. it's a spiritual battle.. no pill is going to fix it.. God bless you guys, you're in my prayers..
It isn't...Schizophrenia is genetic
I was in Hospital 6 months
You don't remember because you were a little boy and childhood memories are very vague to most. It's ok. What is the point of bringing up this stuff
What a horrible “father”