My narc mom always told me she could fall in love very quick and very deep, but as soon as she had the guy she immediatly didn’t like him anymore. She had friends which she set on a pedestal and as soon as they had another opinion than she had, she hated them, discarded them. She hardly has any friends left. The only ones are the super empaths who please her and listen to her for hours and hours. Last week I met a friend( supplie) of my mom and she said she felt drained after she left my mother. My mother had talked for hours and didn’t listen at all to her. She in fact never did. I told the woman that my mom is a narcissist. I don’t know if she knows what that means but since I understand my mother( and father too, but he has aspergers as well, with lots of narc traits) it clears thinks up for me. My sister has been discarded for years, I am the stupid empathic daughter who still visits her narc parents. Years ago I hoped to receive love from them, but never did. I never felt loved, only used, as long as I did what they wanted me to do. I managed to survive my terrible loveless youth, but still suffer from it sometimes. A few years ago I felt in a trap from a narc man and suddenly I felt as I felt like I was a little girl again. That was so strange, I felt the same pain and hurt and wanted to show him constantly I was a good girl, a good woman, who really loved him. He devaluated me, lovebombed me, devaluated me, discarded, cheated, lied and hoovered me for three years. I litterly felt like a little girl again. Cried so much, like I was that little girl in my youth. I began to search the internet on words like: manipulation. And I constantly saw the word narcissism popping up. I consumed every article I found about narcissism, every TH-cam Chanel and finally had an answer for my childhood. My disturbed parents are narcs and my ex is a narc. Maybe my sister is too, she never was an empath, and only used you when she needed you.
Mine is a covert altruistic mid-ranger. It's taken me 20 years to understand what he is. Everyone loves him. He's smart, friendly, helpful to a fault if it means he can be the hero, but there's always been something off. I have never pinpoint what it is... There's a definite lack of depth and intimacy. Bizarre and disproportionate emotional (and lack of) emotional responses. Circular arguements, twisting of words and events, an inability to take responsibility, nonsensical rationalizations for his behavior, and a pathological need to demean absolutely everyone. Everything has to be about him and what he wants right down to playing a video game with our 5 year old. She begged him for months to play Minecraft with her. He prefers shooting games and told her he would play one of his games with her. She wanted to play Minecraft and BEGGED with tears in her eyes. He said no and when she went to her room to cry, he told her it was her fault. "You had your chance. I would have played with you but you had to have it your way." I often wonder how much damage that and countless other instances like it, have done to her. But of course he told me the other day he feels bad for our daughter because of me and my emotional instability. He is completely incapable of putting anyone before himself, yet he has the world believing he is an exceptional generous and caring person.
Hi HG, so basically all the types of narcs are just void without others emotions and these levels are just the skilled manipulation tactics that you've learned on how to acquire the fuel to make your unsettling feeling within you go away ? Wow ! You know how crazy this sounds right ? The midrange can stop it and chooses not to, I have no sympathy for the level of pain they put us through, I wish somewhere in you you could equate the feeling of a narcissistic injury to what your doing to others it's like we are being blamed for the void the pain and the emptiness that you have to live with- we didn't do that to you! The devaluation is like a neon sign that we can't fix you, you finally get bored because you realize we can't fill your Empty cup - we never could and we never will it's like we are your addiction and you have to make us addicted to your false self in order for this to play out thru lies and deceit - it's insane !!only you can do that- you have to look at your own boogie man- it's you !
rubbishycrap - In an 'official' clinical sort of way you have described as of how the mental disorder health industry is basically explaining the occurrence of such disorders. It explains not however how it is possible that even more severe cases of child neglect / abuse are able to turn out as good, kind and emphatic people... I feel there is a very strong tendency in recent times to downplay any behaviour and normalise / trivialise to an extend so that any bad / evil becomes acceptable in our society! This is a deception in the name of kindness and acceptance! The truth is the level of pain and torment the narcissistic victims endure is not accurately reflected and the recent level of trying to push this kind of so called disorders into just 'emotionally unstable' territory by pc activists is very worrying. He who has been met by a derwish of the kind we are discussing here knows that words are often unable to tell the depth of the deception and the evil the narcissist is able to disperse ... there is a term which much more accurately describes the behaviour patterns of such an entity. And please would anyone refrain from temptations as for the need to lecture us that they are 'only humans like you and me' just to please the pc crowd who might be reading their comments. Anyway I have heard this type trying to 'analyse until it's justifiable' many times before and it just doesn't do any justice to the abused victims of which many fall very ill after years of abuse and I suggest that there are people passing before their time just to 'escape' further torment. I think if we would use the term 'demon' or 'demonically possessed' again and with more confidence we would not only be able to describe these entities more accurately and with fewer words, but it would give people more of a clear warming of just how malignant and evil they are at the core and without the need to study the symptoms for years to get a basic grip about that 'no contact' is really the only way to escape their influence. Call a cat a cat! After all there is no being the term 'demon' could be better attributed to in the real world and people need to stand up to this thread and cast them out of their lives. It's the only way to protect yourselves and your loved ones.
Thanks this Clarifies so much of the confusion re the different levels of behaviours, and the information gained from many other sources which often conflicts because of the differences in these levels of narcissism. Clarity re this information helps eradicate any doubts. Thanks for the clear and concise information.
HG, You have described the mid ranger to a T. I appreciate your videos in a way that gives me hope for the first time in a long time. I have answers to so many unanswered questions. Thank you.
Parents with NPD extend this insanity onto their children, why do they not see the damaging effects on children they 'claim to 'love' ? They could choose to be fair or pretend to love them surely
Hi HG, The mid-ranger seems to be the most difficult to understand because his/her motivation is a blend of instinct and premeditation. I guess that the pure lesser and greater types are extremely rare, and most of the narcissists are fluctuating within a rather wide mid range such that the ratio between instinct and awareness in their behaviour depends on their current stress or health level and on particular circumstances of their behaviour. Would you agree with that?
Hi HG Thanks for your your efforts to inform the public on what your kind actually are. I've found everything you have said to be true. You clearly are a Greater Master Narcissist and no one could present the information in a more accurate or clearer way. Though to tell you the truth I don't really think you have much of a chance of getting people to really comprehend the truth of what you are telling them. You have given us a world of accurate, useful, eye opening and empowering information on the narcissist in a romantic relation- ship. I am interested to know if you know anything about the relationship of the scapegoat in a narcissistic family, say where a person is unfortunate enough to be born in a family where all the members are narcissistic and dangerously so ( and miraculously survived this!). Where it appears to be a generational trend to target certain people for abuse until those people literally go insane, commit suicide, or end up dying through destructive behaviour due to self medicating with alcohol or drugs. So essentially what Im saying is that the narcissist begins tormenting this person when the person is a new born, a toddler, a child!!! Are you aware that some of your kind are actually dangerous and aiming to totally destroy a person totaly and its not just about fuel? I haven't heard you speak on any of this. Id love to hear your expert opinions on this.
Ana Jadwa - Yes narcissist will start to torment even a baby, toddler and child! They don't have empathy or feel real parental love so they will harm them without exceptions. The focus is away from explaining that fact and about the so called causes and the focus instead is on making narcissists abused victims rather than starting a discussion on such a huge problem. This is deliberately done to avoid a discussion and a typical deception in our society from actually looking at the real implications of people who are 'just different'. A child molester will always be a narcissist. Think about it! Now you can see why this will not be officially addressed and the focus is on other things like the empathy for (!) narcissists. They do and want to destroy lives. Mine shouted this at me in a different language which I couldn't understand but there was a neighbour who spoke her language and filled me in a few days later about what she shouted at me. No normal and empathic person would wish death torment and loss to a person they pretend to be loving or at least liking.... your pain and failure makes them happy. Until that kind of happiness fades and they do it again to achieve the same warm feelings from your suffering.
As with every video, thank you for your clear words and your gift of bringing the message. Is my kind also devided in schools? Could I be a lesser/midrange empath?
Mrwonderyears15 I'm not sure. I haven't experienced being with a lesser or greater nor do I want to find out. All I can say is that I experienced a lot of emotional pain and mind games.
Exellent. A question hg, does the mid-ranger know that when they cause another person harm for fuel like upsetting em etc, that what their doing is moraly wrong and evil according to societies standards? This question has been on my mind the last few days hg dude. Saint Anger
I have two people close to me that were like this. What is going on with a person that had lots of these behaviors as a teen and young adult including massive shame and self hatred but had extreme empathy seeing starving people on tv or seeing an animal hurt? But planned how to make people do things and would intentionally make a family member upset and later said it made them happy or made them feel better or made them feel powerful. Very controlling. Very violent. Anyone that called them on anything in the nicest way was a bitch. No drugs other than marijuana which they said made them feel better and the behavior started prior to the smoking. One confessed to intentionally getting women to care about them a lot so they could dump them. Then in early twenties one decided that manipulating people was mean and they needed to stop. Then focused on the manipulation actively until the behavior was extinguished. The other more violent one was forced into treatment involuntarily, violence ended by 18 but still intolerable. Both these people kicked out everywhere until they finally stopped cussing people out and trying to intimidate them which was around early 20s.. Now settled with in LTRs with significant others that are happy with them. Btw neither of them likes to be wrong but they mostly just grumble about it when called on it and do the minimum that needs to be done to get the SO to shut up. Lol So are they narcs just holding it in? Or was this some crazy growth phase?
hello HG question. if a mid is aware of what they are doing, and aware they seek fuel , would we then be a different form of a mid or would we remain a mid narcissist?
Thanks! HG, could you please tell me, do they realize when they say they didn't do something bad, that I am pointing out, and start attacking instead? Or is it wiped from their memory?
Petr Kovalev - they know they did something 'bad'. By attacking you you have to defend your point of view hence the focus is not any longer on that they did something bad. It's very clever tactics! You will not be able to make them admit it. Many have tried... there is no gain for them to admit anything and all they do is focused on getting what they want from you. Not the other way round.
They are masters of deflection...even with hardcore evidence they will derail the conversation and start to pinpoint things you did ...these things that they claim that you've done are not bad ..but they will keep planting seeds of doubt and gaslighting you into believing that what you did has hurt them ...by now the conversation has switch back to you and you've forgotten why or how you've gotten to that subject . If they fail at derailing the conversation about them ...they will lie their ass off and come up with some lame ass excuse to why the evidence points to them, even if they look dumb they will say whatever to convince you. They will give you the silent treatment next ..which goes from hours to weeks or months depending how resilient you are. Then they will smear you to whom ever they can so that you will not use whatever evidence you have against them in the future. Even though you have concrete proof of their misconduct they always find a way to turn it back around and make you sorry for even bringing up anything ...best to keep quiet and plan your escape dont call them out of anything even tho you're dying inside . They will sense that there's something going with you if you act calm ...bc our nature as empaths is to seek the truth . Then hell become nice to you just to make you talk to find out what you've been up to. Or hell stalk you without you knowing, invade your phone or laptop ...and use anything against you to keep up drained and exhausted so you wouldnt have energy to call them out on their shit ...and they do this too if they are grooming another source so that they keep you in a haze where you cant think clearly to notice the signs of infidelity. I can keep going on and on and on . Best if you leave and go no contact bc there is nothing he or she can tell you that's even close to the truth.everything is a lie ..you will eventually put the two and two together and find out what went on.
Also their memory is top notch ...they forget nothing ..NOTHING! Instead you start to experience memory loss from the gaslighting snd stress they keep you under to do their dirty work...to keep you right where they want you. Everything they do has motive ...everything..believe that ..I'm giving you some good ass advice and I hope you take it and stop thinking so foolishly that you can save this demon...you are beign conned evey second you spend with this evil entity ..empty and void of emotions and humanity. If you want to be sure ...go ahead there's more damage to be done ...you'll end up in a psych ward . Mark my words ! Good luck
What was my Narcissist? He didn't completely destroy me, he said he didn't hate me. He didn't block me from his channel but from his emails since it all came back.
Sabrina Nascimento - They will normally stay away from totally destroying you as long as they have no alternative. They need to suck on your energy so they can't have you 'dead'. If they moved on they will not care if you are terminally ill or died meanwhile because they can get the fuel they want from that new person. And no, they don't love that new person either. Look at it this way, they are like parasites who suck on your energy and resources to live off and when you are empty they move on.
Fascinating... I know that you regard the Covert Narcissist as being Mid Range. What would you do with the labels of "Borderline," and "Histrionic" as they are considered Cluster B and narcissistic. Perhaps Borderline is just another way of saying Victim Narcissist, and Histrionic is the somatic?
hello HG - a brief question.... how are the three types likely to react if say, you tell them that one of your young male students has given you a solid silver bracelet from Tiffany thank you
It would depend how you delivered the information to the narcissist. If delivered with fuel, the narcissist would see an opportunity for more fuel. Whilst not wounded (because you provided fuel) they would see a challenge and therefore they would look to provoke you a. The Lesser would demand to see the bracelet, probably break it and accuse you of sleeping with the student; b. The Mid-Range would refer to something he bought you to get you to say how that present is superior; c. The Greater would examine the bracelet and denigrate it with some back-handed compliment. If delivered in a way that wounded a. The Lesser would fly into a rage, break the bracelet, throw it away, rage at you for having an affair and possibly confront the student; b. The Mid-Range would accuse you of an affair and roll out a pity play, probably then disappearing in a sulk; c. The Greater would appear not to be interested and then buy your something which outshone the gift. He would also make a mental note to threaten the student in some way
Knowing the Narcissist thank you! I was hoping to figure out which category of L/M/G that particular narc fell into. I'm not sure if he got fuel or not: he spotted me wearing it 9ne evening and started interrogating me about it. His initial response was to say it was probably fake, then look up the value on eBay and then accuse me of flirting with donor of bracelet (a wealthy 17 year old Saudi student studying at the college that we both taught at). So I'm thinking he's a miserly greater? There was also a bit of sulking but I think his main response was to denigrate the gift. thanks for all your work.
Would the "mid-range narcissist" be the 'covert' vs the 'overt' meaning the "greater" narcissist by this definition? And what about the so-called "lower-range" narcissists? Are they those who have only some narcissistic traits but not the actual personality disorder?
Also he is very patient in his tactics and if one thing doesn't get thr most fuel he'll try something else he has no limits on how far he will go to get his fuel. Things that you absolutely think or thought he will never do ...he had already done and or is doing but bc he is si sneaky and secretive you will not find out. He is all about instant gratification and quick fixes he is a risk taker and always tries to be the life of the party around his entourage. He is also your quiet seemingly shy guy who u think is harmless ...watch out he's dissecting everyone while portraying this quiet nice guy. He is good in imitating emotions especially empathy . He will not chase you ..rather get others to do his dirty work. He also has different personal with different t people ...so if u hear something about him that doesn't fit your partner's characteristics...its true..he mirrors like crazy...he picks up other ppl interest and pretends like that's his interests...he is a con artist. Very passive aggressive...he lives beyond his means ..as he wants to impress people with his money and possessions he ultimately goes for trophy wife primary source type...he is reckless...alcoholic , pill popper ...will have sex with your sister ..cousin..neighbor...doesn't matter ...like I said the more risky and taboo something is the more he would want to get his hands on it. Trust your gut
@@dayoftheidealist thank you...I was married to one ...I never knew what it was...until I discarded him ...once I got away I started to see things and then began my journey to understanding what happened to me. I wish you well. .
HG, Are MRN's capable of having any empathy at all for others? Or would the appearance of such just be something of a learned trait from observing others in such situations calling for empathy?
He will see your mouth and lips moving, and hear words and sound coming out of your mouth, but, "Listening" to what you are saying...? That will never happen. They pretend to care... but they really don't! And you will "feel" this as time goes on... trust your gut, listen to your inner self, get away before there's nothing left of YOU!
I had mid-range when was very young. It was ten years ago now. He hoovered me back many times, triangulated with new (old) resource, but one day he decided to leave. Told me he's going to concentrate on her and then done that (and married her, I don't know how possible, but seems they are still together). That was final conversation between us then. Now Im listening to HG and thinking - hm, does that shit still can remember me sometimes? But seems it was really an end - he's gone. I can admit I was a really bad resource: doubted his achievements, angered when he treated mine as less important, laughed at him, trying to make his behavior normal, befriended his friends - triggered his paranoia a lot, played some plays for him with my own friends, and fixed him... terrible partner for a narc. Gosh, now, knowing about narcs world, I understand I was a hell for him... We were hell for each other... Maybe that's why he's gone... And of course I will do all the same, sadistically, if he try to reach me again - and he can predict that perhaps and will never do it.
I think what hg meant by narcs never leave is that narcissits always recycle their old sources ...they keep you in storage .like a savings account or emergency account when you come handy to triangulate with new source ..or when their primary sources leaves their sorry pathetic shells ..ans havent secured a backup they will go to the emergency account of old discarded sources and see what they can get out of them. The power lies in the source...she or he has the power over the narcissit...if the old source falls prey again then he has the upper hand until he lands another source and will discard the recycled old source. So that's why they never give closure they keep you hurt and damaged so when they come back to hoover you ...they will give you an impression that they want to make amends...so moral of the story ..they never leave unless you allow them to. Power lies with the victim. As for midranger narc...they tend to stick around longer than other schools of narcs especially if you're a grade A supply ...they like to blend in and appear normal and stable to gain more fuel and to gain access to privileges in work place or certain organizations or have their primary source fix their fuck ups. It also tells them that they are " good "person and managed to maintain relationship for s while ...they are all about appearances...so if he cant find someone better than you mid range wont leave right away. But he has been and will be cheating day and night ...they are promiscuous. Prostitutes...your neighbor ...their coworker whatever they can get their hands on they will do.
Luces Aeternum I totally agree with you , I have met two narcissist and got out at the year stage. I was a good girl but hard work as I did not bk down to them. I went out , I did my own thing , I had male friends. I liked time to myself . I hardly ever text them first . Their chase and to mould me got to much for them. They had attention, sex , & food , warm cuddles and love & days out , but that’s where it stoped I would not change who I am . I am a piss taker & i love a good laugh hence I would laugh at the Narc for their crazy behaviour! My recent ex said he was far to weak round me & needed to leave . 😂. Jog on then! These people are very boring & sad
marsha k - they don't fall in love (they behave like they do, which is just purposeful acting) and no they don't change or even want to. They just move on to the next 'victim' and that's easy for them because they never lived you. They only made you believe they did to make you hang on to them to the very last second.
I think so . Negative is potent bc it makes them feel important and superior to have actually been able to damage you. It makes them feel invincible....demons ...
The Greater is so much deeper intellectually!.. It's like linear brain against the hologram... Probably mid-range is rather small rubbish than the competitor to the Greater...
It provides us with validation and allows our construct to be powered. If you would like to know more consider reading Fuel and also Fury which go into more detail.
Thank you for your reply. The narcissist that I know was so kind to me at a very difficult time in my life. I would of never thought this person to be a narc . The more I discovered about this person, the more the friendship I thought I had with them started to deteriorate. Silent treatment, icy glances, belittling, doing things to make my life miserable. To the point I had to shut them down by going no reaction to them and ignoring them. The hard part is I feel badly this person is so screwed up and will never experience a true friendship and worse yet a full filling loving relationship. To have meaningless flings with anyone is an empty existence. Are narc's really evil or are they the result of un-treated child abuse? Is there any hope for them?
this was spor on! thank you for respondong to me and referring me.to the mid range. silent treatment is always my punishment. crazed glare. doesnt even blink just awful glare id never seen before. very proper demeanor public's eye. smearing me etc. been on discard and silent for 2 months now. hes my husband..i was told to move nack to isa9from Sweden where we lived
![บุษบา - วงชานเมือง [LiveCoverVertion] Original : เมนทอล](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/Dm81sKcd9rs/mqdefault.jpg)
The picture is so appropriate. I once called him the Tin Man and that he had no heart.
My narc mom always told me she could fall in love very quick and very deep, but as soon as she had the guy she immediatly didn’t like him anymore. She had friends which she set on a pedestal and as soon as they had another opinion than she had, she hated them, discarded them. She hardly has any friends left. The only ones are the super empaths who please her and listen to her for hours and hours.
Last week I met a friend( supplie) of my mom and she said she felt drained after she left my mother. My mother had talked for hours and didn’t listen at all to her. She in fact never did.
I told the woman that my mom is a narcissist. I don’t know if she knows what that means but since I understand my mother( and father too, but he has aspergers as well, with lots of narc traits) it clears thinks up for me. My sister has been discarded for years, I am the stupid empathic daughter who still visits her narc parents.
Years ago I hoped to receive love from them, but never did. I never felt loved, only used, as long as I did what they wanted me to do. I managed to survive my terrible loveless youth, but still suffer from it sometimes.
A few years ago I felt in a trap from a narc man and suddenly I felt as I felt like I was a little girl again. That was so strange, I felt the same pain and hurt and wanted to show him constantly I was a good girl, a good woman, who really loved him.
He devaluated me, lovebombed me, devaluated me, discarded, cheated, lied and hoovered me for three years.
I litterly felt like a little girl again. Cried so much, like I was that little girl in my youth.
I began to search the internet on words like: manipulation. And I constantly saw the word narcissism popping up.
I consumed every article I found about narcissism, every TH-cam Chanel and finally had an answer for my childhood. My disturbed parents are narcs and my ex is a narc. Maybe my sister is too, she never was an empath, and only used you when she needed you.
This is spot on. My ex had a cross between BPD and covert narcissism and I couldn't figure it out. Now I know, mid-range narcissist. Thank you.
Mine is a covert altruistic mid-ranger. It's taken me 20 years to understand what he is. Everyone loves him. He's smart, friendly, helpful to a fault if it means he can be the hero, but there's always been something off. I have never pinpoint what it is... There's a definite lack of depth and intimacy. Bizarre and disproportionate emotional (and lack of) emotional responses. Circular arguements, twisting of words and events, an inability to take responsibility, nonsensical rationalizations for his behavior, and a pathological need to demean absolutely everyone. Everything has to be about him and what he wants right down to playing a video game with our 5 year old. She begged him for months to play Minecraft with her. He prefers shooting games and told her he would play one of his games with her. She wanted to play Minecraft and BEGGED with tears in her eyes. He said no and when she went to her room to cry, he told her it was her fault. "You had your chance. I would have played with you but you had to have it your way."
I often wonder how much damage that and countless other instances like it, have done to her. But of course he told me the other day he feels bad for our daughter because of me and my emotional instability.
He is completely incapable of putting anyone before himself, yet he has the world believing he is an exceptional generous and caring person.
spot on. i was 99% sure he was a mid ranger. now a 100 % sure.
HG, Thank You for being our teacher on "knowing the Narcissist" Not only a great teacher but our savior. Very Grateful
HG, I just want to comment on the artwork that accompanies your writings and videos. It's awesomely creepy. The visual truly depicts the subject.
I love it.
Hi HG, so basically all the types of narcs are just void without others emotions and these levels are just the skilled manipulation tactics that you've learned on how to acquire the fuel to make your unsettling feeling within you go away ? Wow ! You know how crazy this sounds right ? The midrange can stop it and chooses not to, I have no sympathy for the level of pain they put us through, I wish somewhere in you you could equate the feeling of a narcissistic injury to what your doing to others it's like we are being blamed for the void the pain and the emptiness that you have to live with- we didn't do that to you! The devaluation is like a neon sign that we can't fix you, you finally get bored because you realize we can't fill your
Empty cup - we never could and we never will it's like we are your addiction and you have to make us addicted to your false self in order for this to play out thru lies and deceit - it's insane !!only you can do that- you have to look at your own boogie man- it's you !
well said!!
TheJustgarcia #preach!
Omg well said i love it
TheJustgarcia Yah all sounds so exhausting!
rubbishycrap - In an 'official' clinical sort of way you have described as of how the mental disorder health industry is basically explaining the occurrence of such disorders.
It explains not however how it is possible that even more severe cases of child neglect / abuse are able to turn out as good, kind and emphatic people...
I feel there is a very strong tendency in recent times to downplay any behaviour and normalise / trivialise to an extend so that any bad / evil becomes acceptable in our society!
This is a deception in the name of kindness and acceptance!
The truth is the level of pain and torment the narcissistic victims endure is not accurately reflected and the recent level of trying to push this kind of so called disorders into just 'emotionally unstable' territory by pc activists is very worrying.
He who has been met by a derwish of the kind we are discussing here knows that words are often unable to tell the depth of the deception and the evil the narcissist is able to disperse ... there is a term which much more accurately describes the behaviour patterns of such an entity.
And please would anyone refrain from temptations as for the need to lecture us that they are 'only humans like you and me' just to please the pc crowd who might be reading their comments.
Anyway I have heard this type trying to 'analyse until it's justifiable' many times before and it just doesn't do any justice to the abused victims of which many fall very ill after years of abuse and I suggest that there are people passing before their time just to 'escape' further torment.
I think if we would use the term 'demon' or 'demonically possessed' again and with more confidence we would not only be able to describe these entities more accurately and with fewer words, but it would give people more of a clear warming of just how malignant and evil they are at the core and without the need to study the symptoms for years to get a basic grip about that 'no contact' is really the only way to escape their influence.
Call a cat a cat! After all there is no being the term 'demon' could be better attributed to in the real world and people need to stand up to this thread and cast them out of their lives. It's the only way to protect yourselves and your loved ones.
Thanks this Clarifies so much of the confusion re the different levels of behaviours,
and the information gained from many other sources which often
conflicts because of the differences in these levels of narcissism.
Clarity re this information helps eradicate any doubts.
Thanks for the clear and concise information.
HG,
You have described the mid ranger to a T.
I appreciate your videos in a way that gives me hope for the first time in a long time.
I have answers to so many unanswered questions.
Thank you.
Thank you for these discussion.
You are welcome.
Parents with NPD extend this insanity onto their children, why do they not see the damaging effects on children they 'claim to 'love' ? They could choose to be fair or pretend to love them surely
Hi HG,
The mid-ranger seems to be the most difficult to understand because his/her motivation is a blend of instinct and premeditation. I guess that the pure lesser and greater types are extremely rare, and most of the narcissists are fluctuating within a rather wide mid range such that the ratio between instinct and awareness in their behaviour depends on their current stress or health level and on particular circumstances of their behaviour. Would you agree with that?
Hello SK, I would say Greaters are very rare and the bulk are Lesser and Mid-Range types. The fuel level will impact on stress and anxiety.
SK wow. a lot to consider. sounds like you're onto something.
I've just learned that HG Tudor has been removed from You Tube, and I'm truly devastated. Oh the power of Harry's wife.
Hi HG
Thanks for your your efforts to inform the public on what your kind actually are. I've found everything you have said to be true. You clearly are a Greater Master Narcissist and no one could present the information in a more accurate or clearer way. Though to tell you the truth I don't really think you have much of a chance of getting people to really comprehend the truth of what you are telling them.
You have given us a world of accurate, useful, eye opening and empowering information on the narcissist in a romantic relation- ship.
I am interested to know if you know anything about the relationship of the scapegoat in a narcissistic family, say where a person is unfortunate enough to be born in a family where all the members are narcissistic and dangerously so ( and miraculously survived this!). Where it appears to be a generational trend to target certain people for abuse until those people literally go insane, commit suicide, or end up dying through destructive behaviour due to self medicating with alcohol or drugs. So essentially what Im saying is that the narcissist begins tormenting this person when the person is a new born, a toddler, a child!!!
Are you aware that some of your kind are actually dangerous and aiming to totally destroy a person totaly and its not just about fuel? I haven't heard you speak on any of this.
Id love to hear your expert opinions on this.
Ana Jadwa - Yes narcissist will start to torment even a baby, toddler and child!
They don't have empathy or feel real parental love so they will harm them without exceptions.
The focus is away from explaining that fact and about the so called causes and the focus instead is on making narcissists abused victims rather than starting a discussion on such a huge problem. This is deliberately done to avoid a discussion and a typical deception in our society from actually looking at the real implications of people who are 'just different'.
A child molester will always be a narcissist. Think about it!
Now you can see why this will not be officially addressed and the focus is on other things like the empathy for (!) narcissists.
They do and want to destroy lives. Mine shouted this at me in a different language which I couldn't understand but there was a neighbour who spoke her language and filled me in a few days later about what she shouted at me.
No normal and empathic person would wish death torment and loss to a person they pretend to be loving or at least liking.... your pain and failure makes them happy. Until that kind of happiness fades and they do it again to achieve the same warm feelings from your suffering.
As with every video, thank you for your clear words and your gift of bringing the message. Is my kind also devided in schools? Could I be a lesser/midrange empath?
Thank you.
I thought I was listening to Alan Rickman....
I think mine was mid range
This is my ex... I know what he is now.
Tonya Deaton question. did the mid range narcissist cause you as much pain as a lesser or greater?
Mrwonderyears15 I'm not sure. I haven't experienced being with a lesser or greater nor do I want to find out. All I can say is that I experienced a lot of emotional pain and mind games.
Exellent. A question hg, does the mid-ranger know that when they cause another person harm for fuel like upsetting em etc, that what their doing is moraly wrong and evil according to societies standards? This question has been on my mind the last few days hg dude. Saint Anger
HG, how do each of the narcissists discard you..the lesser, mid and greater? Thank you
I have two people close to me that were like this. What is going on with a person that had lots of these behaviors as a teen and young adult including massive shame and self hatred but had extreme empathy seeing starving people on tv or seeing an animal hurt? But planned how to make people do things and would intentionally make a family member upset and later said it made them happy or made them feel better or made them feel powerful. Very controlling. Very violent. Anyone that called them on anything in the nicest way was a bitch. No drugs other than marijuana which they said made them feel better and the behavior started prior to the smoking. One confessed to intentionally getting women to care about them a lot so they could dump them. Then in early twenties one decided that manipulating people was mean and they needed to stop. Then focused on the manipulation actively until the behavior was extinguished.
The other more violent one was forced into treatment involuntarily, violence ended by 18 but still intolerable. Both these people kicked out everywhere until they finally stopped cussing people out and trying to intimidate them which was around early 20s.. Now settled with in LTRs with significant others that are happy with them. Btw neither of them likes to be wrong but they mostly just grumble about it when called on it and do the minimum that needs to be done to get the SO to shut up. Lol So are they narcs just holding it in? Or was this some crazy growth phase?
hello HG
question. if a mid is aware of what they are doing, and aware they seek fuel , would we then be a different form of a mid or would we remain a mid narcissist?
8:35 can you say this sentence again please? I couldn’t hear the sentence at this time in your video.
Can you do a video on transitional targets?
do you use mid-rangers as lieutenants? if so, how do they fuel you?
Is there any situation in which the narcissist could ever feel completely dominated by another person and repugnant, so dependent on him/ her?
Yes
Thanks! HG, could you please tell me, do they realize when they say they didn't do something bad, that I am pointing out, and start attacking instead? Or is it wiped from their memory?
Petr Kovalev - they know they did something 'bad'. By attacking you you have to defend your point of view hence the focus is not any longer on that they did something bad. It's very clever tactics! You will not be able to make them admit it. Many have tried... there is no gain for them to admit anything and all they do is focused on getting what they want from you. Not the other way round.
They are masters of deflection...even with hardcore evidence they will derail the conversation and start to pinpoint things you did ...these things that they claim that you've done are not bad ..but they will keep planting seeds of doubt and gaslighting you into believing that what you did has hurt them ...by now the conversation has switch back to you and you've forgotten why or how you've gotten to that subject . If they fail at derailing the conversation about them ...they will lie their ass off and come up with some lame ass excuse to why the evidence points to them, even if they look dumb they will say whatever to convince you. They will give you the silent treatment next ..which goes from hours to weeks or months depending how resilient you are. Then they will smear you to whom ever they can so that you will not use whatever evidence you have against them in the future. Even though you have concrete proof of their misconduct they always find a way to turn it back around and make you sorry for even bringing up anything ...best to keep quiet and plan your escape dont call them out of anything even tho you're dying inside . They will sense that there's something going with you if you act calm ...bc our nature as empaths is to seek the truth . Then hell become nice to you just to make you talk to find out what you've been up to. Or hell stalk you without you knowing, invade your phone or laptop ...and use anything against you to keep up drained and exhausted so you wouldnt have energy to call them out on their shit ...and they do this too if they are grooming another source so that they keep you in a haze where you cant think clearly to notice the signs of infidelity. I can keep going on and on and on . Best if you leave and go no contact bc there is nothing he or she can tell you that's even close to the truth.everything is a lie ..you will eventually put the two and two together and find out what went on.
Also their memory is top notch ...they forget nothing ..NOTHING! Instead you start to experience memory loss from the gaslighting snd stress they keep you under to do their dirty work...to keep you right where they want you. Everything they do has motive ...everything..believe that ..I'm giving you some good ass advice and I hope you take it and stop thinking so foolishly that you can save this demon...you are beign conned evey second you spend with this evil entity ..empty and void of emotions and humanity. If you want to be sure ...go ahead there's more damage to be done ...you'll end up in a psych ward . Mark my words ! Good luck
What was my Narcissist? He didn't completely destroy me, he said he didn't hate me. He didn't block me from his channel but from his emails since it all came back.
Sabrina Nascimento - They will normally stay away from totally destroying you as long as they have no alternative.
They need to suck on your energy so they can't have you 'dead'.
If they moved on they will not care if you are terminally ill or died meanwhile because they can get the fuel they want from that new person. And no, they don't love that new person either. Look at it this way, they are like parasites who suck on your energy and resources to live off and when you are empty they move on.
Fascinating... I know that you regard the Covert Narcissist as being Mid Range. What would you do with the labels of "Borderline," and "Histrionic" as they are considered Cluster B and narcissistic. Perhaps Borderline is just another way of saying Victim Narcissist, and Histrionic is the somatic?
Jason333M but borderline could manipulate The narc . Ive heard that, narc getting more insane cannot read and played by The borderline mind.
Really?
I see my ex's traits as both a lesser and mid range narcissist
hello HG - a brief question.... how are the three types likely to react if say, you tell them that one of your young male students has given you a solid silver bracelet from Tiffany thank you
It would depend how you delivered the information to the narcissist. If delivered with fuel, the narcissist would see an opportunity for more fuel. Whilst not wounded (because you provided fuel) they would see a challenge and therefore they would look to provoke you
a. The Lesser would demand to see the bracelet, probably break it and accuse you of sleeping with the student;
b. The Mid-Range would refer to something he bought you to get you to say how that present is superior;
c. The Greater would examine the bracelet and denigrate it with some back-handed compliment.
If delivered in a way that wounded
a. The Lesser would fly into a rage, break the bracelet, throw it away, rage at you for having an affair and possibly confront the student;
b. The Mid-Range would accuse you of an affair and roll out a pity play, probably then disappearing in a sulk;
c. The Greater would appear not to be interested and then buy your something which outshone the gift. He would also make a mental note to threaten the student in some way
Knowing the Narcissist thank you! I was hoping to figure out which category of L/M/G that particular narc fell into. I'm not sure if he got fuel or not: he spotted me wearing it 9ne evening and started interrogating me about it. His initial response was to say it was probably fake, then look up the value on eBay and then accuse me of flirting with donor of bracelet (a wealthy 17 year old Saudi student studying at the college that we both taught at). So I'm thinking he's a miserly greater? There was also a bit of sulking but I think his main response was to denigrate the gift.
thanks for all your work.
i think all of them would accuse you of having an affair with the student, cuz they would.
Would the "mid-range narcissist" be the 'covert' vs the 'overt' meaning the "greater" narcissist by this definition? And what about the so-called "lower-range" narcissists? Are they those who have only some narcissistic traits but not the actual personality disorder?
Also he is very patient in his tactics and if one thing doesn't get thr most fuel he'll try something else he has no limits on how far he will go to get his fuel. Things that you absolutely think or thought he will never do ...he had already done and or is doing but bc he is si sneaky and secretive you will not find out. He is all about instant gratification and quick fixes he is a risk taker and always tries to be the life of the party around his entourage. He is also your quiet seemingly shy guy who u think is harmless ...watch out he's dissecting everyone while portraying this quiet nice guy. He is good in imitating emotions especially empathy . He will not chase you ..rather get others to do his dirty work. He also has different personal with different t people ...so if u hear something about him that doesn't fit your partner's characteristics...its true..he mirrors like crazy...he picks up other ppl interest and pretends like that's his interests...he is a con artist. Very passive aggressive...he lives beyond his means ..as he wants to impress people with his money and possessions he ultimately goes for trophy wife primary source type...he is reckless...alcoholic , pill popper ...will have sex with your sister ..cousin..neighbor...doesn't matter ...like I said the more risky and taboo something is the more he would want to get his hands on it. Trust your gut
@@dayoftheidealist thank you...I was married to one ...I never knew what it was...until I discarded him ...once I got away I started to see things and then began my journey to understanding what happened to me. I wish you well. .
@@smbensli , you just described the ex as if you know him personally.
HG,
Are MRN's capable of having any empathy at all for others? Or would the appearance of such just be something of a learned trait from observing others in such situations calling for empathy?
There is only false cognitive empathy. Watch the 'Three Strands of Empathy" video.
Knowing the Narcissist Thank you HG, I will do that! 💜
He practiced.
Will the mid range listen if you talk to him from a caring manner? Being s though you said he is more likely to change?
he will listen if he sees it as a benifit to him some how
He will see your mouth and lips moving, and hear words and sound coming out of your mouth, but, "Listening" to what you are saying...? That will never happen. They pretend to care... but they really don't! And you will "feel" this as time goes on... trust your gut, listen to your inner self, get away before there's nothing left of YOU!
NO
J F thank you you don't have to tell me twice...
middle management?
HG, does mid-range leave?... If so, how?
The reason I ask is because I viewed a video that says narcissist never leave.
I had mid-range when was very young. It was ten years ago now. He hoovered me back many times, triangulated with new (old) resource, but one day he decided to leave. Told me he's going to concentrate on her and then done that (and married her, I don't know how possible, but seems they are still together). That was final conversation between us then. Now Im listening to HG and thinking - hm, does that shit still can remember me sometimes? But seems it was really an end - he's gone.
I can admit I was a really bad resource: doubted his achievements, angered when he treated mine as less important, laughed at him, trying to make his behavior normal, befriended his friends - triggered his paranoia a lot, played some plays for him with my own friends, and fixed him... terrible partner for a narc. Gosh, now, knowing about narcs world, I understand I was a hell for him... We were hell for each other... Maybe that's why he's gone... And of course I will do all the same, sadistically, if he try to reach me again - and he can predict that perhaps and will never do it.
I think what hg meant by narcs never leave is that narcissits always recycle their old sources ...they keep you in storage
.like a savings account or emergency account when you come handy to triangulate with new source ..or when their primary sources leaves their sorry pathetic shells ..ans havent secured a backup they will go to the emergency account of old discarded sources and see what they can get out of them. The power lies in the source...she or he has the power over the narcissit...if the old source falls prey again then he has the upper hand until he lands another source and will discard the recycled old source. So that's why they never give closure they keep you hurt and damaged so when they come back to hoover you ...they will give you an impression that they want to make amends...so moral of the story ..they never leave unless you allow them to. Power lies with the victim. As for midranger narc...they tend to stick around longer than other schools of narcs especially if you're a grade A supply ...they like to blend in and appear normal and stable to gain more fuel and to gain access to privileges in work place or certain organizations or have their primary source fix their fuck ups. It also tells them that they are " good "person and managed to maintain relationship for s while ...they are all about appearances...so if he cant find someone better than you mid range wont leave right away. But he has been and will be cheating day and night ...they are promiscuous. Prostitutes...your neighbor ...their coworker whatever they can get their hands on they will do.
Luces Aeternum I totally agree with you , I have met two narcissist and got out at the year stage.
I was a good girl but hard work as I did not bk down to them. I went out , I did my own thing , I had male friends. I liked time to myself . I hardly ever text them first . Their chase and to mould me got to much for them. They had attention, sex , & food , warm cuddles and love & days out , but that’s where it stoped I would not change who I am . I am a piss taker & i love a good laugh hence I would laugh at the Narc for their crazy behaviour!
My recent ex said he was far to weak round me & needed to leave .
😂. Jog on then! These people are very boring & sad
so can the mid ranger change completely and stop his behaviour if he falls in love?
marsha k - they don't fall in love (they behave like they do, which is just purposeful acting) and no they don't change or even want to.
They just move on to the next 'victim' and that's easy for them because they never lived you. They only made you believe they did to make you hang on to them to the very last second.
Is negative fuel as potent as positive fuel?
Lyn Bopp I think he says negative is more potent
Yes more so. Like a naughty child
Infact they are naughty children who don't like their own medicine.
I think so . Negative is potent bc it makes them feel important and superior to have actually been able to damage you. It makes them feel invincible....demons ...
what happens when a mid range and a greater meet?
There will be a video about this in the future.
The Greater is so much deeper intellectually!.. It's like linear brain against the hologram... Probably mid-range is rather small rubbish than the competitor to the Greater...
Hell on Earth. That's what fucking happens
@@KnowingtheNarcissist hi, where can I find this video? What's the title?
Always Hiding?
🦉
What the heck is a mid-range narcissist!?
I don't understand the true purpose of fuel?
It provides us with validation and allows our construct to be powered. If you would like to know more consider reading Fuel and also Fury which go into more detail.
Thank you for your reply. The narcissist that I know was so kind to me at a very difficult time in my life. I would of never thought this person to be a narc . The more I discovered about this person, the more the friendship I thought I had with them started to deteriorate. Silent treatment, icy glances, belittling, doing things to make my life miserable. To the point I had to shut them down by going no reaction to them and ignoring them. The hard part is I feel badly this person is so screwed up and will never experience a true friendship and worse yet a full filling loving relationship. To have meaningless flings with anyone is an empty existence. Are narc's really evil or are they the result of un-treated child abuse? Is there any hope for them?
Ann Rienks no hope for them ... it cannot be treated
Very sad. Thanks for your reply.
this was spor on! thank you for respondong to me and referring me.to the mid range. silent treatment is always my punishment. crazed glare. doesnt even blink just awful glare id never seen before. very proper demeanor public's eye. smearing me etc. been on discard and silent for 2 months now. hes my husband..i was told to move nack to isa9from Sweden where we lived