A number of people have been asking if there are full court transcripts of each case which the answer is no. The sources only take snippets of these different cases and put those along with other snippets. Most but not all of these are from sites who took these transcripts from Steven D. Price and Charles M. Sevilla who were lawyers and wrote books recording these silly things said in real court recordings. You can find the case names in those books but I highly doubt you will find the case transcripts from just the names online. Thanks for watching! ALSO the third one just premiered go check it out: th-cam.com/video/JfcMEMmSOFE/w-d-xo.html
That moment and the followup with Apollo gives me the impression that they knew exactly what they were doing, then Edgeworth went along with it to troll Iris as hard as possible.
"Doctor, do you recall the time you examined the body?" "The autopsy started around 8PM." "And he was dead at the time?" "If not, he was dead by the time I finished" *This is concerning and hilarious at the same time*
Well, I mean if someone asks if you the Performed an autopsy, by the time you're done, they are going to be dead. There's pretty much no question there, so it's a little late to worry about it.
To be fair actual attorney would even say only the tutorial part are unrealistic cause you won't teach people while there's an actual court. That's fair lol
How do you know he was dead ? Because his brain was in a jar on my desk. But are you sure he was dead ? No, it is possible that he was alive and practicing law somewhere.
to be fair, the judge took none of the sh*t, and the "doctor" threw it all right back, clearly being the smartass of the room. Apollo's paragraph was clearly designed to confuse, and saying such a "sentence" in itself requires some brainpower. Wright's biggest error was confusing the location of the shot, but otherwise was able to roll with the punches of the stupid and intentionally confusing questions. All that leaves is Edgeworth, who caught the stupid and something that could very easily have been in one of the games (likely as a reply to pushing when player is backed up against the wall fishing for any clue they can get). There is a case to be made that iris was the actual lowest in the room for falling victim to the mind games, but she does have to compete with Edgeworth, who did not have enough lines to fully judge.
@@Valcuda depends, you can face charges of either manslaughter or murder (1st, 2nd or 3rd degree, even though 3rd degree is basically the same as manslaughter) depending on the situation
0:33 My dad actually knew the guy that said this! It was the witness, and when asked when the stairs went down the Witness said, "They go up too" And the lawyer didn't know what to do
HOLD IT! This testimony clearly contradicts your previous testimony. If you could see his head and his shoulders you should have said so from the start!
@@reaperofthings That... sounds much more accurate to the game. We’ll accept my dialogue as one of the other options that doesn’t cost you any points and let’s you try again.
I know you're kidding, but I wanted to say this anyway: at least in America, it's legally required that both parties have access to all the same evidence, so that's probably why that didn't happen.
what you are asking: Can't we use Cos2A = 1 - 2Sin²A on the left hand side and get RHS in 4 steps? what the teacher heard: "How long have you been a French Canadian?"
1:26 Have you ever had a dream that that you um, you had, you'll t-, you would you could, you do, you would you want you you could do some, you... You'll do, you could you, you want, you want him to do you so much you could do anything?
"You forgot? How can you forget? Give us an example of something you forgot!" This sounds like it wouldn't be out of place in an actual Ace Attorney game.
Its interesting, because if "during" was replaced with "before" or "after" the answers grow by a lot. Its very possible to send a car flying, but those are usually fatal cases
I've watched enough Ace Attorney to know that these dumb questions are only asked to buy the defense time while they think of an actually good question.
I LOVE that there's no explicit transition between each excerpt and it really looks like they're all just shouting increasingly awful questions at poor Iris who is in despair while Klavier takes it and dishes it back out
All of this stupidity couldn’t have possibly fit into one case, but you know what, I’ll take it as the truth, because there is a first time for everything.
Hmm, actually there is one case of a guy being here even before he returned from leaving. I suppose this lawyer must have had to try Jesus at some point.
@@Kittymouth He can only keep it together in the Investigations, when Phoenix isn't around. Not saying that means anything, but you know. Interesting correlation.
"If I weren't under oath, I'd return the compliment." It took me a few days to figure out what he meant by that, but that quote struck me like a freight train when I did.
@@fuyuki8989 In other words, he can’t say he’s a handsome talented man because he’d be lying. Meaning they’re indirectly calling the attorney in question ugly
Okay but when he went, had you gone and had she, if she wanted to, and were able, for the time being excluding all the restraints on her not to go, gone also, would he had brought you, meaning you and she, with him to the station?
@@Damage42X Same, well, kinda. He's asking a question that kind of has an implied nearly impossible outcome on his question, and he's stating all the improbabilites said outcome has Out of context, though, it's hilarious af. imagine being asked that irl
I’m wheezing and crying watching “Where was the dog at this time?” Iris, sobbing: “attached to the ears” “The Myasthenia Gravis, does it affect your memory at all?” Iris, still crying: “....Yes” “And in what ways does this affect your memory?” Iris, in physical pain at this point: “I forgot”
1:03 - Hey, going through the game's logic, that current nose she has on right now could be a prosthetic to cover the accident she had as a child, or to pose as that child that was in time of the accident. Or maybe her surgical records could become a clue later on that provides proof to an absence as she was attending something else; To have surgery on her nose. Ergo, that was an absolutely and completely validated and reasonable question to be asking!
_"People die when they are killed"_ _"The floor here is made out of floor"_ _"If you hard, then you hard"_ _"The archer class really is made up of archers"_ _"Why does berserker goes berserk?"_ _"The director's the director"_ _"So you dodged my undodgeable blow"_ _"This city really looks like a city"_ _"Even in ancient times, only a dragon-slayer is capable of slaying a dragon"_ _"Just because you are correct doesn't mean you're right"_ _"Fun things are fun"_ _"They'll continue to live until they die"_ _"The left arm is not the right arm"_ _"We should use logical thinking to think logically"_ _"If you don't want to fight me, then prove it by fighting me"_ These will make fine additions to my collection
Some of these are actually less stupid than they're made out to be- for instance, when a lawyer is cross-examining a witness they'll often ask a lot of quick, easy questions they know the answer to to get the witness used to saying the truth without hesitating. "How old is your youngest child" was probably meant to be something like that (or getting the info on the record), but they slipped in "the twenty year old" because... they're the lawyer of course they already know. That being said, "How long have you been French-Canadian" is still absolutely the best thing I've ever read
@@NaughtiusMaximmus the only thing I spend on my life animation was to be sent Delete and delete and delete all the way back to the b m to the b m to the b m to the b m to the b m to the b m to the b m to the b m to your knees
This had me literally crying while laughing and having to pause the video multiple times. It's even more hilarious trying to imagine the context in which these statements were given in court. Thank you
I found a whole book of these lawyer moments! It's Disorder in the Court, by Charles M Sevilla. A few of these cases where featured in it, so idk if that's where OP got it.
1:50 The fact that he refused to lie under oath in his previous statement means that we can accept his statement of having committed suicide 4 times as fact. Add it to the court record.
That doctor is such an advanced troll and that his jokes is so simple yet so amazing once you figure out it’s double meaning. Love those legendary answers that contradicts itself.
"When he went, had you gone and had she, if she wanted to, and were able, for the time excluding all the restraints on her not to go, gone also, would he have brought you, meaning you and she, with him to the station..." *"That question should be taken out and shot."* My favorite.
With this pne just in case is too much of a riddle it meant to ask if the first guy would have allow the other 2 if they were able to go, (also implying there was some sort of condition on the girl but asking that to be ruled out) simple made complicated to try and disrupt the witness being examined, waaaay to complicated of a logic to even be comprehended at the span of a few seconds
![[UNCUT]"ทักษิณ" โชว์ฤทธิ์-ครอบครอง "อุ๊งอิ๊ง" ประเทศไทยมีนายกฯ 1แถม1 I คนดังนั่งเคลียร์ I 23 ส.ค.67](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/Uyl4y59R-Sk/mqdefault.jpg)
A number of people have been asking if there are full court transcripts of each case which the answer is no. The sources only take snippets of these different cases and put those along with other snippets. Most but not all of these are from sites who took these transcripts from Steven D. Price and Charles M. Sevilla who were lawyers and wrote books recording these silly things said in real court recordings. You can find the case names in those books but I highly doubt you will find the case transcripts from just the names online. Thanks for watching!
ALSO the third one just premiered go check it out: th-cam.com/video/JfcMEMmSOFE/w-d-xo.html
K
Can we get the sources?
Yeah that's great but what are the books titles
@@janLilin
Nust google the authors names bro and search the books they wrote.
I appreciate the addition of the music.these are great
“I would return the compliment if I wasn’t under oath.” Is such an Ace Attorney line. I would be surprised if it wasn’t in the game.
It felt like it was the right person delivering it, too :D
If they talked about being under oath in AA, they’d have to acknowledge that lying in court is an actual crime, and we couldn’t have that
@@zoeyoprey7406they actually did but most of the time it is ignored (I don't remember when though)
@@zoeyoprey7406 in great ace attorney case 3 they mention perjury
@@Whispersmith646 They do also mention perjury somewhere in the original trilogy, I think.
"If I wasn't under oath, I would have returned the compliment."
We just witnessed a brutal murder in the court room.
I don't think its an insult
Edit: ok I dint know what an oath was and now I'm being brutally massacred
@@furiousfurry It is. He can’t lie under oath, so he’s saying that calling the lawyer intelligent and honest would be a lie.
@@furiousfurry if I was under oath, I wouldn't call you intelligent.
@@furiousfurry if I was under oath then I would be making this comment
I haven't witnessed a man be so brutally massacred in a courtroom since Caesar.
I love the way Nick is just "Now's my time to shine" and then proceeds to be stupid at the speed of light.
The Sonic of stupidity. Gotta go fast!
its high level witness badgering
That moment and the followup with Apollo gives me the impression that they knew exactly what they were doing, then Edgeworth went along with it to troll Iris as hard as possible.
this is just actual ace attorney (at least when i play, after all i'm the one making Phoenix do the stupid shit💀)
@@darkacadpresenceinbloodit's in character, he's a dumbass (I mean that as affectionately as possible)
"Doctor, do you recall the time you examined the body?"
"The autopsy started around 8PM."
"And he was dead at the time?"
"If not, he was dead by the time I finished"
*This is concerning and hilarious at the same time*
Well, I mean if someone asks if you the Performed an autopsy, by the time you're done, they are going to be dead. There's pretty much no question there, so it's a little late to worry about it.
@@roetemeteor autopsy, not to be confounded with necropsy
One of them has a 100% death rate while the other is probably around 20%
Trafalgar law in a nutshell
@@lilylunamoonyt LMAO YES
@@MasquedMocha hello fellow person of culture, glad to see someone understood my reference :D
"was that the same nose you broke as a child" sounds like a normal ace attorney twist
Mimi Miney: *sweats nervously*
No, *it wasn't.*
Kim K sends her regards
Nose replacement surgery receivers be like: *_“No.”_*
oral.
And they say Ace attorney is unrealistic
Damn you beat me to it, gg
Looking for your comment
Fair enough to the antics, though I think we can all be glad American court cases don't *need* to end with determining a guilty party :P
To be fair actual attorney would even say only the tutorial part are unrealistic cause you won't teach people while there's an actual court.
That's fair lol
it is unrealistic. they’re too smart
“Doctor, are you absolutely positive the victim you examined is dead?”
“ We’ll, I suppose it’s possible he’s alive and practicing law somewhere.”
How do you know he was dead ?
Because his brain was in a jar on my desk.
But are you sure he was dead ?
No, it is possible that he was alive and practicing law somewhere.
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Ohhhh that's an oldy but a goodie.
I just love how everyone in the room besides iris has the combined IQ of the temperature of the room
Idk, most court rooms I only need to bring a long sleeves. I don't think they get that hot
What if I measure it in kelvin?
to be fair, the judge took none of the sh*t, and the "doctor" threw it all right back, clearly being the smartass of the room. Apollo's paragraph was clearly designed to confuse, and saying such a "sentence" in itself requires some brainpower. Wright's biggest error was confusing the location of the shot, but otherwise was able to roll with the punches of the stupid and intentionally confusing questions. All that leaves is Edgeworth, who caught the stupid and something that could very easily have been in one of the games (likely as a reply to pushing when player is backed up against the wall fishing for any clue they can get). There is a case to be made that iris was the actual lowest in the room for falling victim to the mind games, but she does have to compete with Edgeworth, who did not have enough lines to fully judge.
Measured in Celsius
@@islu6425 It was a valid question...
Ace attorney, but the lawyers haven't slept in several days
So just Ace Attorney?
Just like real lawyers
Regular Ace Attorney
You mean weeks? 😭
*Years
1:46 requires its own homicide trial holy shit
i don’t get it pls explain
@@AxolinaAxolotl Under oath, you cannot lie.
He is saying that returning the compliment would be a lie.
@@ThatExplo
Technically, you _can_ lie, but you would be risking felony charges of perjury
@@littlefishbigmountain just like how you can commit murder, but then you'd be facing charges of man slaughter
@@Valcuda depends, you can face charges of either manslaughter or murder (1st, 2nd or 3rd degree, even though 3rd degree is basically the same as manslaughter) depending on the situation
0:33 My dad actually knew the guy that said this! It was the witness, and when asked when the stairs went down the Witness said, "They go up too" And the lawyer didn't know what to do
the lawyer forgot how stairs worked
HOLD IT! you're telling me the stairs went both up and down at the same time? but those are opposite directions!!!!!
Ohh, what was the case then?
@@ArcanineEspeon I'd have to ask him, but I'd wager it'd be Norfolk county court sometime between ~1990-2000
The lawyer has only ever seen escalators, let them be
“I could see his head.”
“And where was his head?”
“Just above his shoulders?”
Me, an Ace Attorney pro: “HOLD IT! How do you know he has shoulders?”
HOLD IT! This testimony clearly contradicts your previous testimony. If you could see his head and his shoulders you should have said so from the start!
@@reaperofthings That... sounds much more accurate to the game. We’ll accept my dialogue as one of the other options that doesn’t cost you any points and let’s you try again.
Haven't even played Ace Attorney but I still did that, 😂
"Because I can see his shoulder"
"How can you see the shoulder?"
"They're just below his head"
To be fair, that was the most useful question in this whole thing (which isn't saying much) since we now know he wasn't decapitated.
I'm surprised that Edgeworth didn't update the autopsy.
Added details: "was performed on a dead person"
the trial started at 8:01pm
I know you're kidding, but I wanted to say this anyway: at least in America, it's legally required that both parties have access to all the same evidence, so that's probably why that didn't happen.
@@joveegillen6966 yeah, but in Japan you can do that
@@Karasvoid You foolish fool! _everyone_ knows Ace Attorney is set in California!
Me: *asking genuine questions because i didn't understand the subject*
What the teacher thinks i am asking:
When you crack the apple open:
what you are asking: Can't we use Cos2A = 1 - 2Sin²A on the left hand side and get RHS in 4 steps?
what the teacher heard: "How long have you been a French Canadian?"
Ouch to my heart
Reminds me of:
"Dude we have the same name"
"Really, what's your name?"
Same energy.
The dude with 36 aliases:
“He’s 20 much like your IQ”
THERE’S NO COMING BACK FROM THAT ONE.
"How many times have you committed suicide?"
"... Four times."
"...oral."
I actually did it 5 times
Honestly, I wish the law allowed for those jokes.
Can relate
A reasonable person would say, committed? 0 times. Attempted? 4 times
i think these were meant to be psychological questions but they just sound really dumb
when he asked if he did the authopsy on a dead person, he ALMOST got an accusation
They do really be trying to confuse the witness
Did someone say "P S Y C H O L O G Y"?!
"How old is your son?"
"38 or 35 i can't remember"
"How long as your son lived with you?"
"45 years"
that's a psychology question?
@@RequestTheSinger *45 years
"you forgot? How can you forget? Give us an example of something you forgot!" Is literally just an ace attorney investigations line.
1:26
Have you ever had a dream that that you um, you had, you'll t-, you would you could, you do, you would you want you you could do some, you... You'll do, you could you, you want, you want him to do you so much you could do anything?
oral
"You forgot? How can you forget? Give us an example of something you forgot!"
This sounds like it wouldn't be out of place in an actual Ace Attorney game.
For real
I forgot what I forgot
Update the autopsy report, pls
_Salary cutting noises_
It sounds like a genuine line Edgeworth would say in an Investigations game.
"How far apart were the cars during the collision" I'm so dumb. I did not see anything wrong with this statement
Happens to the best of us
These questions are meant to confuse the witnesses by asking them the same questions in different ways
It isn’t wrong. The witness needs to be telling the truth. If they aren’t, then they’d say two inches apart
Its interesting, because if "during" was replaced with "before" or "after" the answers grow by a lot. Its very possible to send a car flying, but those are usually fatal cases
me too
I've watched enough Ace Attorney to know that these dumb questions are only asked to buy the defense time while they think of an actually good question.
_"If you can't Dazzle them with Brilliance,_
_Baffle them with Bullshit..."_
_- Phoenix and Apollo, Turnabout Insanity_
"All your responses from now on must be oral, okay?
What school did you go to?"
*"Oral."*
"How old are you?"
*”Oral.”*
@@zipperooni where were you born?
I thought he meant Oral Roberts University
"What were you doing at the time?"
*O r a l .*
I LOVE that there's no explicit transition between each excerpt and it really looks like they're all just shouting increasingly awful questions at poor Iris who is in despair while Klavier takes it and dishes it back out
iris is suffering so much
@@MyoticTesseract It feels so strange seeing her do Dahlia's mannerisms though. Even though she does it in the game itself.
Oral 👁️👄👁️
The first part has me rolling every time, edgeworth eventually stops thinking and joins in
You can't stop the stupid, you can only get in on it
I was expecting separate incidents, but the rapid-fire questions just made it so much better
I’d like to imagine this was just one super long argument and not multiple arguments put together cause it’s way better that way.
It is
Now we need to construct a whole entire case that fits it all together
This is just 1 long one
All of this stupidity couldn’t have possibly fit into one case, but you know what, I’ll take it as the truth, because there is a first time for everything.
@@rurumuhelsi5561 the geniune stupidity in this would've been dense enough to cause a singularly if it were all in one case
"If i weren't under oath, I'd return the compliment." ... bro Klavier needs to CHILL tf out he chose violence damn
Local lawyer gets murdered
@@shalax7881 but in the autopsy was the lawyer really dead? 🤔🤔
@@Hala-k Oral
@@atlasreborn7221 :0
His name literally means "piano" in German. That threw me off for a second...
“Apollo, are you ready to say the dumbest shit in your life?”
"You say the stairs went down...did they go up as well?"
"My son is 20...much like your IQ"
“Sir, what is your IQ”
“ w e l l , i c a n s e e p r e t t y w e l l , i
t h i n k . ”
The funniest possible way of saying “below average.”
@@demilad225
"How old is your son?"
"35 to 38 years, I can't remember."
"How long has he been living with you?'
*"F o r t y - F i v e Y e a r s"*
In my country, there's an eyeglasses company named IQ I think
@@yumiko523 I think it's eye-Q, like a pun lol
oral
1:45 is the greatest roast I've ever seen
@someone random when your under oath you have to tell the truth. Does that help?
69 likes tho
HOLY FUCK, now I get it. I didnt even realize its a roast or something rude
@@Kitteh328 same
2:52 she Forgor💀
this one comment right here is such a relic of the past
The fact *they have to ask these questions* is why I will never get sick of this
This isnt a court case anymore, this is a full-on Monty Python sketch
Tru, but the Spanish Inquisition just showed up to my house and I wasn't expecting them
@@Centyme I expected them...
soo they sent the portugese inquisition
@@datonecommieirongear2020 but NOBODY EXPECTS THE SPANISH INQUISITION
@@Centyme Which can only mean one thing…
Your honor! This witnesses testimony is bullshit!
Klavier just leaning in and saying 'oral.' with the MOST SMUG LOOK ON HIS FACE made me laugh way too hard.
Oh, my.
Oh, my.
That makes me feel like the guy who originally said this stuff was just messing with them the whole time because they sounded super dumb
Oh, my.
Oh, my.
3:57 the entire court is guilty.
“If I weren’t under oath I’d return the compliment.”
HOLY SHIT
- The youngest son, the 20-year-old, how old is he?
- 20, just like your IQ
Absolutely murdered.
*Dead Body Reported
Yes I can read the video
oral.
@@marshmellowguy586 Good for you, buddy. I'm glad you know how to read.
“...So you were gone until you returned?”
Naturally
A wizard is never late, nor is he early. He returns precisely when he is no longer gone.
Hmm, actually there is one case of a guy being here even before he returned from leaving. I suppose this lawyer must have had to try Jesus at some point.
Just like people die when they are killed!
0:14
that was the exact moment Phoenix, with the help of Apollo, started what would be the most glorious debate to ever be held in that courtroom.
_"All you r answers must be oral"_
*proceeds to ask something completely stupid*
_"Oral."_
I love the idea that this trial is just Phoenix and Apollo having a rapid fire himbo off.
I love how eventually Edgeworth butts in, not to rerail *anything*, but simply to pull the same exact shit
@@stacy__fakename Fight fire with fire
@@stacy__fakename that's pretty much the first 2 games at least. Edgeworth likes to play that he's some kinda mister, but we all know he a thot.
RAPID FIRE HIMBO OFF I LOVE THAT 😩
@@Kittymouth He can only keep it together in the Investigations, when Phoenix isn't around. Not saying that means anything, but you know. Interesting correlation.
I like that Edgeworth at first is confused about what's happening but just joins in halfway through
I'm personally trying to see if my brain has enough capacity to fit all these quotes into the same case.
i love that apollo and nick look so proud and convinced by their statements
"If I weren't under oath, I'd return the compliment."
It took me a few days to figure out what he meant by that, but that quote struck me like a freight train when I did.
Can you explain it to me please
@@fuyuki8989 basically if he weren't under the oath to speak the truth, he would return the compliment, meaning that the compliment would be a lie-
@@fuyuki8989 He knows the lawyers are dumb af
@@fuyuki8989 In other words, he can’t say he’s a handsome talented man because he’d be lying. Meaning they’re indirectly calling the attorney in question ugly
@@mariayyad2546
Well damn
“How many times have you _committed suicide?”_
“Four Times”
Lawyers are probably more used to saying "committed suicide" than "attempted", so they just said the former by mistake, and the client didn't notice.
@@japanpanda2179 It's still hilarious though lol
@@abdisaniini Totally
@Ayoub Habou "what school did you go to?" "Oral"
i cannot believe you have commited suicide!
Ace attorney but the only thing they learnt in law school is how to make that satisfying slam noise with a desk or table
1:18 what the dog doin?
Okay but when he went, had you gone and had she, if she wanted to, and were able, for the time being excluding all the restraints on her not to go, gone also, would he had brought you, meaning you and she, with him to the station?
That question should be taken out and shot.
You know, reading it slowly I finally understood it.
@@Damage42X Same, well, kinda. He's asking a question that kind of has an implied nearly impossible outcome on his question, and he's stating all the improbabilites said outcome has
Out of context, though, it's hilarious af. imagine being asked that irl
@Eric Lee that you could
that you
that he
uhm
Godzilla had a stroke trying to read this and fucking died
I love how the start (Wright preparing himself with Apollo) made it look like they were in a competition of who would ask the dumbest thing
Here is your first comment. Also I know and I bet Edgeworth was also in on it.
That actually sounds like something they’d have to really try hard for 😂
I’m wheezing and crying watching
“Where was the dog at this time?”
Iris, sobbing: “attached to the ears”
“The Myasthenia Gravis, does it affect your memory at all?”
Iris, still crying: “....Yes”
“And in what ways does this affect your memory?”
Iris, in physical pain at this point: “I forgot”
1:03 - Hey, going through the game's logic, that current nose she has on right now could be a prosthetic to cover the accident she had as a child, or to pose as that child that was in time of the accident. Or maybe her surgical records could become a clue later on that provides proof to an absence as she was attending something else; To have surgery on her nose. Ergo, that was an absolutely and completely validated and reasonable question to be asking!
These are on "People die when they are killed" level
Same as "i made water wet" level
_"People die when they are killed"_
_"The floor here is made out of floor"_
_"If you hard, then you hard"_
_"The archer class really is made up of archers"_
_"Why does berserker goes berserk?"_
_"The director's the director"_
_"So you dodged my undodgeable blow"_
_"This city really looks like a city"_
_"Even in ancient times, only a dragon-slayer is capable of slaying a dragon"_
_"Just because you are correct doesn't mean you're right"_
_"Fun things are fun"_
_"They'll continue to live until they die"_
_"The left arm is not the right arm"_
_"We should use logical thinking to think logically"_
_"If you don't want to fight me, then prove it by fighting me"_
These will make fine additions to my collection
With that attitude they do
One of them literally is that:
"Isn't it true when a person dies in his sleep..he doesn't know about it until the next morning?"
@@shikikankillzone4239 Here have a few more i heard i forget where.
People die if they are murdered to death.
The secret to immortality is, not dying.
Some of these are actually less stupid than they're made out to be- for instance, when a lawyer is cross-examining a witness they'll often ask a lot of quick, easy questions they know the answer to to get the witness used to saying the truth without hesitating. "How old is your youngest child" was probably meant to be something like that (or getting the info on the record), but they slipped in "the twenty year old" because... they're the lawyer of course they already know.
That being said, "How long have you been French-Canadian" is still absolutely the best thing I've ever read
I mean, I've been trying to quit for a while.
Ty is a fanmade fanmade Popularity popelee up with comment anffdddddr education fc fd rc cddc. Dcccc
@@waldoman7 the best ideas to give her I don't want to lose her for a log in bones is not saving you money
@@lennygirlthetruesavvysavag2410 ...what
@@NaughtiusMaximmus the only thing I spend on my life animation was to be sent Delete and delete and delete all the way back to the b m to the b m to the b m to the b m to the b m to the b m to the b m to the b m to your knees
The fact that all of the characters would genuinely say these in their respective situations killed me even more than the victim
3:25 SCP-055
but that doest exist!
Love how the judge was just tired of everyone's shit at the end "i'm arresting all of you"
“How old is your son, the one living with you?”
“38 or 35, I can’t remember”
“And how long has he been living with you?”
“45 years”
Wait n-
Wait a minute
WAIT A MINUTE
Sus
I mean, it's funny, but it's not hard to see how someone could accidentally say 45 instead of 35. So not sus on its own.
“Sir, what is your IQ?”
1:45 "If I weren't under oath, I'd return the compliment" Lol
This had me literally crying while laughing and having to pause the video multiple times. It's even more hilarious trying to imagine the context in which these statements were given in court. Thank you
i really want to know who was defending and who the witnesses for this case were irl now
But how long has that man been French Canadian?
@@Daybreak6427 I... Don't know how to explain.
@@amberlee787 You don't know how to explain, but can you describe it?
It's definitely multiple cases
@@thespyer2k Nope. It's one, check the description
I found a whole book of these lawyer moments! It's Disorder in the Court, by Charles M Sevilla. A few of these cases where featured in it, so idk if that's where OP got it.
That one along with the sequel by another author! Good find!
2:05 made me lose it
1:56
LMAO
1:50
The fact that he refused to lie under oath in his previous statement means that we can accept his statement of having committed suicide 4 times as fact. Add it to the court record.
“Thank you, if I weren’t under oath, I’d return the compliment” has got to be the sickest burn I’ve heard this year.
That doctor is such an advanced troll and that his jokes is so simple yet so amazing once you figure out it’s double meaning. Love those legendary answers that contradicts itself.
2:11 Thailand, bangkok
“Was he shot in the woods?”
“No, he was shot in the dick”
“(What country is that in?)”
WHEN I TELL YOU I WHEEZED-
The first 2 statements are one and the same
@@SniperOnSunday L E N G T H E N
Ah yes, the lumbar region.
W H E E Z E
Ah yes, they are going to Brazil
I love how you turned a bunch of dumb lawyer quotes into one cohesive trial
Cohesive is a strong word.
Having Iris be tearing up when she asked to leave was a nice touch.
i'm new to this fandom and this video sent me into hysterics. how are these quotes REAL
This is glorious and fits too well...
"When he went, had you gone and had she, if she wanted to, and were able, for the time excluding all the restraints on her not to go, gone also, would he have brought you, meaning you and she, with him to the station..."
*"That question should be taken out and shot."*
My favorite.
With this pne just in case is too much of a riddle it meant to ask if the first guy would have allow the other 2 if they were able to go, (also implying there was some sort of condition on the girl but asking that to be ruled out) simple made complicated to try and disrupt the witness being examined, waaaay to complicated of a logic to even be comprehended at the span of a few seconds
Needs a damn few semicolons and a redo
Man an ace attorney channel! Finally TH-cam algorithm suggest me something cool!
The entirety of the prosecution's case in the Rittenhouse trial
it was self defense, the attackers were white, and they had criminal records
"I am arresting all of you."
I was JUST watching the first
Same
Me too
Me too
Lol me too 😂
same
“I’m arresting all of you” should be the verdict in every case in the Ace Attorney series
1:01 i love the implication of that one
I love how Iris slowly goes from irritation to anger to on the verge of a breakdown
They aren't just clowns, they're the whole godamm circus...
They aren't just circus they are the whole carnival....
Sorry that was a bad one
@@livingtrashbag1077 no no, that was good
They’re all arrested
@@livingtrashbag1077 they aren't just the carnival, they're the entire organization
1:45 Oh my god, I can smell that sizzle through the screen.
I needed to laugh after my hard day at work. Thank You!
Every Random Among Us Lobby:
How it was like 8 months ago lmfao, haven't played it since the release of the fourth map so idk
imposter
The smartass look Apollo had when asking how many times Klavier comitted suicide straight out killed me
I wish someone could make a dramatic reenactment of these cases as a compilation because it's too much to imagine real people saying this
I didn't know how much I needed this video until I saw it. This is pure gold
"I show exhibit 3 and ask if you recognize the picture."
"That's... me."
"Were you present when that picture was taken?"
Fell out of my chair
And where was your chair when this happened?
@@Alex-uq1el "On the ground"
@@passingdem0n303
But what about you?! Where were you when the chair fell?
@Tyler Vincent
That explains nothing! Why were you on the ground!?
@Tyler Vincent
You fell out of the chair, you say? But why!? Why did you fall out of your chair!?
PLS WHERE DO U FIND THIS SHIT IM ASCENDING
in tur net 👁👄👁
@@Chessete prob reddit
Internet
@@Chessete i have no idea what this means and i really wanna know what case its from
@@zoegeorge9920 he’s saying “internet”. In other words, it’s probably not too hard to find stuff kind this if you search a bit
"Thank you, if it weren't for the oath, I'd return the compliment" is SUCH A SAVAGE REPLY. ABSOLUTE MURDER
This is how I play Ace Attorney, meaningless unrelated questions like this
"So you were gone until you returned?"
Emiya Shirou: Finally a worthy opponent
Also Rowen from Ronin Warriors.
"Lady Kayura, she's a girl!"
the fact that cornered is playing makes this more funny
holy shit it’s been 2 years, stop liking this comment
Cornered is a banger and it fits this perfectly
Ah yes, the only thing that’s cornered in this courtroom is everyone’s intelligence
Wow replying third on a 1.8 liked comment
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They've been cornered in a circle
I have never heard "that question should be taken out and shot" before but it ia now my new catchphrase