Don McMillan - Greatest Charts (Volume 1)

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 28 พ.ย. 2024

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  • @emmettbrown6418
    @emmettbrown6418 2 ปีที่แล้ว +956

    What he said about Highly-Paid Security Consultant is true. Back in the late 1970s, we'd play Star Trek on the terminals in the Physics department. One day, two guys from Navy and one from the FBI came and arrested on of the students for hacking. He never came back because he was convicted and then became a highly paid security consultant for the Navy.

    • @ticotube2501
      @ticotube2501 ปีที่แล้ว +33

      Well, if it was the 1970s he probably didn't get arrested for a security breach but simply because he stole that precious computing time while playing Colossal Cave Adventure on punchcards. 😂 Edit: Oh, Star Trek is even older. I didn't know that. Must have been a ton of fun back then.

    • @TheFreshestResh
      @TheFreshestResh 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +9

      Yes an FBI guy + navy guys totally arrested a student for hacking, after which he became rich 🌚

    • @georgen5882
      @georgen5882 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

      He just watched Catch Me If You Can and changed the plot slightly. The exception is that the movie is based on a real person and the other is fiction. I’m sure hacking in some form existed in the 70s, but it’s not like everyone was connected to the internet. Computers were also not nearly the same and data storage was different. If this story was even remotely true, he would more likely have been arrested for theft or trespassing on government property because remote access would have been near impossible with technology at the time.

    • @peglor
      @peglor 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@georgen5882 Just about every significant part of the catch me if you can story was a lie from the guy who wrote it too.

    • @aquapony
      @aquapony หลายเดือนก่อน

      Cool story bro

  • @SpammingY
    @SpammingY ปีที่แล้ว +243

    Dude, the "money is the root of evil" being literally translated, and then the continued logic works really well and really got me 😂

    • @Ryvaken
      @Ryvaken 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      That joke is so very old. The usual construction starts with women = time * money.

    • @Juan-qv5nc
      @Juan-qv5nc 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      @@Ryvaken Consequently, Facebook = Women. Go figure.

  • @NoriMori1992
    @NoriMori1992 ปีที่แล้ว +182

    "The essence of human life is CHEAPER THAN PRINTER INK!!" 😂

    • @Chris-ut6eq
      @Chris-ut6eq 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      You just need a dark crystal and some gelflings to bottle essence.

  • @JessieG0226
    @JessieG0226 5 ปีที่แล้ว +385

    I still have tears from laughing so hard! Don is living proof that something does NOT need to be ‘crude’ to be funny. His props are simple and SO funny! Thanks, DON. 😂🤣😍

    • @bleckybob
      @bleckybob 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Exactly. Clean comedians are hard to find. Clean female comedians are impossible to find. All they do is talk about sex and their vaginas

    • @Da1X_Builds
      @Da1X_Builds ปีที่แล้ว +18

      The only crude thing in this video is the oil on that graph

    • @lmp9726
      @lmp9726 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      Few successful stand-ups "need" to be crude.

    • @Zerpersande
      @Zerpersande 8 วันที่ผ่านมา

      I’ve never heard anybody say that humor has to be ‘crude’ to be funny.
      But it IS a fact that something can BE crude and still be funny.
      Get a clue.

  • @NickMaovich
    @NickMaovich 3 ปีที่แล้ว +226

    I want this humor to be popular again.
    So much better than all todays crap

    • @ndumisomsomi9053
      @ndumisomsomi9053 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      Bro. Just jokes. No agenda. Nothing more. Just fun awesome jokes.

    • @jackbotman
      @jackbotman 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

      like, subscribe and share :)

  • @jaisangwan3074
    @jaisangwan3074 2 ปีที่แล้ว +75

    Respect for being genuinely funny, unique and smart

  • @computerrefurbishment9748
    @computerrefurbishment9748 4 ปีที่แล้ว +350

    Most original comedy set I've seen in a long time. Very, funny and will share this!

    • @Vexins
      @Vexins ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I know I’m like two years late, but tbh a lot if not most of his bits were not original. The Facebook proof is adapted from a Women= time x money proof.

    • @ciggy358
      @ciggy358 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Yep, same with the shopping routes. Seen that ages ago.

  • @trishcook5002
    @trishcook5002 2 ปีที่แล้ว +97

    I discovered Don McMillan about 20 years ago on a NERD channel on DirecTv. He was hysterical then. Just saw him on AGT this week & was thrilled to see him! He's still hysterically funny now. I hope he wins the finale show!!!

  • @bobperrine6193
    @bobperrine6193 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +24

    Who would have ever thought a power point presentation would be so funny.

  • @Sherrie77722
    @Sherrie77722 2 ปีที่แล้ว +147

    Just saw him on AGT and thought he was hilarious. So did a search and found this. I hope he goes far on AGT.

    • @ritasmith2107
      @ritasmith2107 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      That's exactly what I did, too!! I hope he goes on tour. Casinos? I'd love to see him!!

    • @user-nh4pn6jj7p
      @user-nh4pn6jj7p ปีที่แล้ว

      Hilarious! Technology can be used to highlight the differences between the sexes.

    • @jamiehebert2212
      @jamiehebert2212 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      He is coming to the improv next month near me. I can’t wait to see him live!!

  • @spacelemur7955
    @spacelemur7955 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    Literally the first comic causing me to repeated belly-laugh in 3-4 years.
    The best comedians are always intelligent.

  • @ukdavepianoman
    @ukdavepianoman ปีที่แล้ว +12

    Gosh, he is so hilariously funny. That FB proof was utterly brilliant.

  • @regacc3594
    @regacc3594 4 ปีที่แล้ว +70

    three cartridges: A, B and O
    that was smartly funny

  • @hjwang4477
    @hjwang4477 3 ปีที่แล้ว +244

    He needs his own Netflix show. His bits are so unique and funny to smart people

    • @jasonlewis460
      @jasonlewis460 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      He needs to just sell it to them,

    • @TheJKDub420
      @TheJKDub420 ปีที่แล้ว

      Yet, you’re here and still apparently enjoyed it. So must be funny for dumb people to.

    • @ryanmontminy3979
      @ryanmontminy3979 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      He's even funny to me and I'm stupid

  • @Kaderon11
    @Kaderon11 5 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    He turns the USB joke into a thankful for USB C joke xD. That's awesome

  • @kevinforth7618
    @kevinforth7618 5 ปีที่แล้ว +72

    Loved it. The mall shopping was great, the path to security expert was great ... thanks!

  • @rjones6219
    @rjones6219 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    Not a single foul word, just plain and simple humour. Very clever😂

  • @aprildegele1510
    @aprildegele1510 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Exactly why you are my new favorite comedian. Truth, friend.

  • @DS-jh1bp
    @DS-jh1bp 2 ปีที่แล้ว +27

    Found you from Dry Comedy Bar, love your sense of humor and delivery. LOVE the charts and presentations!

  • @AK-jt7kh
    @AK-jt7kh 2 ปีที่แล้ว +30

    Found this guy on Dry Bar! He’s SO FUNNY! 😂 omg! I’m a nerd too, and I just love this.

  • @Telerian3
    @Telerian3 4 ปีที่แล้ว +65

    My goodness, this was hilarious! Thank you for being a funny Nerd we can all add a bit of joy with your bit. I look forward to seeing more of your work. Instant Sub

  • @grob25
    @grob25 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Greatest man in comedy. As an engineer, i quote you all the time.

  • @ahill209
    @ahill209 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    I saw Don at a conference of mostly engineers earlier this year and he was hilarious. Yes, engineers do have a sense of humor!

    • @RobertCairo
      @RobertCairo ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Engineers are nerds with some socialization skills. Mathematicians on the other hand ...

  • @RatBoyGL
    @RatBoyGL 2 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    Saw Don for the first time on AGT. Where has he been hiding!!!! OMG so funny!!!

  • @schnoogens76
    @schnoogens76 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I loved the lady laughing loudly in the background! 😂

  • @inyourface123
    @inyourface123 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    This to me is the single most funniest video on TH-cam 😂

  • @donaldandersen8043
    @donaldandersen8043 5 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    Hilarious. I watched it five times in a row. Flawless logic.

  • @velvetpaws999
    @velvetpaws999 5 ปีที่แล้ว +34

    The fb proof is totally factual and correct. Loved it and laughed my tush off!

  • @Ryvaken
    @Ryvaken 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +11

    The best part about the shopping trip is that at 7:40 you can see, the red line never actually leaves the mall. It terminates right before it would have reached the gap.

    • @liamrogers7485
      @liamrogers7485 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Nah she does she just goes in an exact reverse order, lol!!!!

  • @charleswm.taylor1737
    @charleswm.taylor1737 5 ปีที่แล้ว +21

    Thanks for the great laughs. All charts were fun but I especially enjoyed the one on printer ink! So TRUE!

  • @SDW90808
    @SDW90808 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    First saw Don at a corporate conference twenty years ago. I forgot how funny he is. Thanks for the laffs!

  • @randywesterberg2488
    @randywesterberg2488 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Funniest comedian I have seen in a long time!

  • @taulionsuniverse6991
    @taulionsuniverse6991 2 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    This channel is way underrated you deserve more bro 😂

  • @williamthethespian
    @williamthethespian 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    You and John (?) Austin are the funniest guys alive. Thank you.

  • @HiGHrVOLTAGE
    @HiGHrVOLTAGE 5 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    I just died over and over. Best comedian of 2019

  • @wtstine
    @wtstine 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Have shared this with dozens of other folks. They all love it and laugh out loud!

  • @imeldapearce
    @imeldapearce 3 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    This is hysterical! Printer ink costs more than blood! So clever. Turned on by math.

  • @HyliaLynx
    @HyliaLynx ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Watching this now cuz it’s being shared on IG. Absolutely brilliant humor

  • @gsbailey6436
    @gsbailey6436 5 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    I finally understand algebra thanks to your Facebook graph. Thanks Don! ~ Forever math-challeged

  • @edmillard6407
    @edmillard6407 5 ปีที่แล้ว +42

    One of the funniest routines I've ever seen. Laughed my butt off!

    • @richardd3367
      @richardd3367 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Hey, now he's a weight loss coach! 🤣

  • @ignaspetrauskas8763
    @ignaspetrauskas8763 5 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    That facebook eqation was one of the best things i've seen

  • @timerover4633
    @timerover4633 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    He is absolutely fantastic.

  • @ScrewballMcAdams
    @ScrewballMcAdams 5 ปีที่แล้ว +19

    Hilarious! Thanks for making me laugh out loud today. I needed that.

  • @captaincodebook3200
    @captaincodebook3200 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Love this guy.

  • @kandycrowe224
    @kandycrowe224 5 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    Loved it! Science, math, social media = GREAT!

  • @unstopology
    @unstopology 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I've heard this set a few times and it gets me every time! So funny!

  • @mr_indie_fan
    @mr_indie_fan ปีที่แล้ว +6

    "Honey, you are so hot right now" that killed me 💀 (and he's not wrong)

  • @MustPassTruck
    @MustPassTruck 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    If I hadn't deleted my Facebook account, I would have shared this video in FB.

  • @hayfork100
    @hayfork100 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Great compilation of your great jokes.

  • @karax3848
    @karax3848 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I love this guy!

  • @jestrada123
    @jestrada123 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    Fantastic Don, I loved this.

  • @ginny5937
    @ginny5937 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I first saw Don's show on DryBar, A year or so ago, and loved it!! So glad to find him again. His graphs and his delivery are hilarious! Bravo, more, more!👏💐💗🙋😆

  • @LandCrashr
    @LandCrashr 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Simply amazing , you made my day, thx for your gift .

  • @astrojohn7943
    @astrojohn7943 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Incredibly accurate!

  • @larrylorenzen2449
    @larrylorenzen2449 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I’m cracking up uncontrollably!!

  • @jadenprice1463
    @jadenprice1463 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    this is marvellous. good job sir!

  • @matthewlepak2878
    @matthewlepak2878 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Don! You rock. Thank you for the laughs. Jesus bless!

    • @JakobusVdL
      @JakobusVdL 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      He is good, but where does he stand on the Jesus thing?
      As a nerdy Engineer, I think I can guess that he's nor feeling bessed

    • @matthewlepak2878
      @matthewlepak2878 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      ​@@JakobusVdLWE ALL BELIEVE IN JESUS DEEP DOWN

    • @JakobusVdL
      @JakobusVdL 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@matthewlepak2878 deep down, you know that is not true.
      By the way, your caps lock is stuck on.

  • @BadPhD777
    @BadPhD777 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    This video needs a warning on it because you aren't prepared to laugh as hard as you do! Great stuff!

  • @poohisrich29
    @poohisrich29 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    This man is a funny tech legend!

  • @MrRudyc
    @MrRudyc 5 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Very well done! Very smart guy..

  • @nadezhdamalashich1425
    @nadezhdamalashich1425 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Love the pure math and pure comedy❤

  • @hbertolinih
    @hbertolinih 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I laughed a lot! Thanks ! Waiting for your presentation about Instagram or Tim Tok!

  • @Ronbassettphd
    @Ronbassettphd 5 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    Very funny wisdom spot on observations regarding the absurdity of contemporary life

  • @sangmccraw740
    @sangmccraw740 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Clean humor! 😂

  • @lisakeenen6053
    @lisakeenen6053 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    This guy is great!

  • @bonniedias745
    @bonniedias745 5 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    One of the funniest I have seen in months.

  • @fairphil2890
    @fairphil2890 5 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    Very original comedian. This dude rules. PowerPoint stand up comedy is a genius idea.
    Hilarious.

    • @Jeppelelle
      @Jeppelelle 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      This entire bit was practically stolen so i have no idea why you think he is original?

    • @Vexins
      @Vexins ปีที่แล้ว

      @@Jeppelelle yeah the Facebook proof was just blatantly ripped from the women = time x money joke with no changes beyond the left hand side.

  • @matador6650
    @matador6650 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Awesome sense of humor!

  • @ozzie1185
    @ozzie1185 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Great stuff!!! More, please!!!

  • @dennisklaes9509
    @dennisklaes9509 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    On point 💥💯
    Ink is worth more than blood?
    It always felt like that for sure😅

  • @saywhat83
    @saywhat83 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    6:00 I divided my weekly grocery excel list into zones to optimize my route Inside walmart...glad to hear I am not alone

    • @davidmam
      @davidmam 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

      There are people who donkt do this?

  • @clickrick
    @clickrick ปีที่แล้ว +2

    "Therefore Facebook = Evil".
    That's my kind of Nerd right there!

  • @robertclark6759
    @robertclark6759 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I love it. I am not sure what I should be striving for as a target on the the venn diagram.

  • @dburjorjee
    @dburjorjee 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Always confused about whether I was a Nerd or a Geek. thanks for the clarification.

  • @bradpierce
    @bradpierce 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Really funny Don!!!! Loved it!

  • @khangvutien2538
    @khangvutien2538 ปีที่แล้ว

    Best selection of Dan’s jokes

  • @TheAyeAye1
    @TheAyeAye1 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Quality charting

  • @deotan6294
    @deotan6294 ปีที่แล้ว

    That is so clean... No need for green jokes absolutely awesome

  • @truewax257
    @truewax257 5 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    This guy's hilarious!!! :-)

  • @laguitarradepablo
    @laguitarradepablo ปีที่แล้ว +1

    The last one is key. Great stand up comedy

  • @unayearwood758
    @unayearwood758 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    Hysterical especially Network Security Expert Career path and the Facebook Proof!

  • @bobbiehennessy4636
    @bobbiehennessy4636 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    HILARIOUS!!!

  • @RV6Pilot
    @RV6Pilot 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    I’ve always said that you can tell a nerd from a geek with simple Star Trek test: geeks watch it, nerds also watch it, but they wear the costumes too.

  • @toolittletoolate3917
    @toolittletoolate3917 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    The shopping mall part is 100% accurate WRT my wife and me, even though she is Japanese! It’s universal and must be part of the female brain’s deep structure. We also manifest the male/female spending pattern, i.e. she spends money on 1,000 little things every day, while I spend almost nothing until I plunk down $5,000 on a new gaming PC every few years.

    • @4.0.4
      @4.0.4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Well if you spend countless hours arguing technical details online before spending $5k on the PC you can technically have a good $/min rate.

    • @RobertCairo
      @RobertCairo ปีที่แล้ว

      Women's brains are wired differently: My wife will come home and say, "Look at the money I saved!" when she shows me the receipt with the regular price vs. sales price marked on it. I always say, No you spent X dollars.(P.S. I'm an engineer and loved the Venn diagram bit)

    • @mkvv5687
      @mkvv5687 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Yes. Most of the 200ky or so of our species was as hunter/gatherers.

  • @diannehill3374
    @diannehill3374 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Nailed it!

  • @youtubecommenter2
    @youtubecommenter2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    The shopping bit is definitely true of my mother as well.

  • @LeeMaverick
    @LeeMaverick ปีที่แล้ว +3

    The powerpoint master (along with Dave Gorman, of course!) :)

  • @EvaderGuy
    @EvaderGuy 6 ปีที่แล้ว +19

    Whew! I was afraid I was a stalker. Turns out I’m just a nerd! Winning!

    • @dmuntz
      @dmuntz 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Technically, you're just a smart stalker.

  • @mastanickel
    @mastanickel 6 ปีที่แล้ว +20

    Damn I'm a total dork. Time to get obsessed.

    • @TAG152gaming
      @TAG152gaming 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Lol try the Marvel Universe it's worth getting obsessed over now that Avengers: Infinity War really tied it all together.

    • @jimsal78
      @jimsal78 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I like how a Nerd is just a stalker with intelligence :P

  • @GreenChilliD
    @GreenChilliD 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    I am hanging that Venn in my cube. That is hilarious

  • @wiggsan
    @wiggsan 6 ปีที่แล้ว +21

    This guy is awwwwwwwesome!!!

  • @floriotj
    @floriotj 6 ปีที่แล้ว +29

    No cuss words. How refreshing!!

  • @joelishok4992
    @joelishok4992 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Hilarious. Right on observations

  • @garrghhh
    @garrghhh ปีที่แล้ว

    Beautiful!
    First intersection I started looking at after "nerd" was placed in the middle was "socially awkward" ∩ "obsession". I was on _tenterhooks_ waiting for the reveal there ... wasn't quite sure what was going in there, but, expected amusement and something fitting enough.
    Delivered++.
    _(Seems kinda obvious, after reveal. But, obviously wasn't actually obvious - didn't guess that. Hence - perfectly fitting, and amusing. Has my own 'nerding' squeezed every ounce of humor out yet, or shall I continue...)_ 😄

  • @Mrddagley1
    @Mrddagley1 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I laughed my till it hurt!! WELL Done!!

  • @roberthartig5868
    @roberthartig5868 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Absolutely FUNNY! ...

  • @kathyboly19
    @kathyboly19 ปีที่แล้ว

    BRILLIANT!!

  • @freddytan777
    @freddytan777 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    My Goodness, this is the funniest presentation I have attended... LOL LOL

  • @gardenjoy5223
    @gardenjoy5223 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Didn't know there was a gap in the comedy world, till you came along and fixed it!
    Love watching you. Amazing talent! If I had a big company (which I don't) and I needed someone to liven things up a bit, I'd hire you. I'm sure you find twenty appropriate things at our place to make us laugh about. Comedy as a cure :)

  • @DarthRelkew
    @DarthRelkew ปีที่แล้ว

    As soon as he mentioned using blood for ink, I practically died laughing. That was one of the the funniest things I’ve seen in a long time