Op did not ruin Joanna's party. Joanna ruined her own life. MOH set Joanna's stupid behind up, and she fell right on into it. A real friend would not encourage you to cheat on your fiance. I feel for OP and the other women who were put in that situation. I have 0 sympathy for Joanna. MOH is an AH. Joanna needs to make better choices.
I also think Joanna was orally servicing the stripper as well. I don't believe she was just sitting there with a naked man's crotch in her face doing nothing. Op was nice not to totally out her. But, I don't know if I would have been. Dude was a sex worker. He could have had an STD. She could have caught it and passed it to her fiance. SMH.
There is a bro code that you don't sleep with your bro's ex, and I can understand that Evan feels betrayed, but you're right that this isn't cheating.... it is something much more forgivable. Edit: the fact that Evan broke it off makes it even more forgivable, while the acts Evan made to push OP into the boinking makes Evan a total TA
You just don't EVER date your brother's ex. EVER. If your brother wants to reconnect, it's his timeliness, no one else's. If you Had Cheated, YOU WOULD DESERVE NO RELATIONSHIP. But, One WeekIs Still Close.
Why do 304s use "girl code" to breed infidelity. Last time I checked, the bro code says "a bro will stand up for another bro even against themselves." Meaning if your decision is about to ruin your life (like cheating), bro code says speak up.
@@Maninawig I mean it's a fact that girls would like to take side of other girl even if she's guilty. I'm not saying that all girls would but they definitely would like to. So ig they just saw bro code and said "oh yeah girl code 🤷🏻♀️"
@@experiencedotaku171 That does make for an interesting conflict of interest though, as things like the Me2 movement was about standing up for victims... but how does one do that and abide by the girl code when the SA was done by a female? That might explain the dismissive nature towards different crimes
Story 1: Wait.... sinething does not compute.... OP slepr with his step bro Ex, there is no relationship, but all of a sudden step bro is inviting him to a wedding and the other Step bto is threatening to go NC if OP dosent come? Something aint right
He slept with stepbro1's (younger step brother) ex - who he didn't want to break up with - and stepbro2 (older stepbro) threatened to go NC with him if he didn't go to the wedding after OP found out stepbro1 was there and didn't want to ruin the wedding for him.
I'm still mad about this the next day. Husband was a bit TA, but only a bit because I get that our society doesn't talk about this stuff or the logistics of s3x. Like I'm sorry but people actually DO NEED to learn how it works. And if they're taught wrong, they're not going to suddenly "fix" it because you told them, "initiate more."
Goodness! I so wonder what mess she grew up in. It can even not be an intense religious setting. My family was secular but one generation back there was some really messy religious stuff that was hidden from me.
Hate it when people blame alcohol for cheating, I've been drunk a few times, yet I've never cheated on my partner at the time no matter how drunk I've been (even when I was flat out so drunk I needed to be practically carried home, I still never cheated, despite one of my then bf friends hitting on me to see if I'd cheat, I didn't cheat and pushed him away) you will only cheat if your that kind of person and alcohol has nothing to do with it it's all to do with the fact that you have no morals. Joanna ruined her own life noone held a gun to her head and told her to cheat
He did make it clear what hapoebed, by accident he means his logic was not sound, nor was his mental state when he did the act. Thry were apart for a month, the two brothers had been fighting, he tried to be there for his brither his brother mocked him for not even having a gf in the first place in a moment of weakness he acted. They seem to be reconsiling
He was drunk, they were arguing, they 2 were apart, he wasn't in the right mind. Being mocked for not having a girl was the straw that broke the camel's back and in a state of rage he enacted the cheating. OP at least has taken responsibility for it which commendable, probably not forgivable but commendable. Most cheaters deflect the blame or take the blame at first but then end it with "But..." implying they are going to imply it is someone else's fault.
I’m sorry, but Evan is a freaking baby. Basically cutting out his brother from the rest of the family _for years_ because OP (checks notes…) Slept with his ex that *_he broke up with_* after *_he insulted OP_* for being single. Seriously, eff him. 🙄
@@samiulhuda4001true, but Evan also broke the bro code: A bro never weaponizes another bro's insecurities. That is just a low blow. Second, while bro doesn't sleep with another bro's ex, one of the loopholes is if the bro (Evan) was the one to break it off. It relinquishes the dibs. So if we are looking at faults, oP would be 75%TA, but Evan would be 125% TA.
@@samiulhuda4001😂😂😂😂, no. As long as he didn't cause the break up, she's fair game. The real salient issue is that he knew his brother would be upset by it, and so he did it specifically to hurt him. That's the dick move here. If he was legitimately interested in the woman, then that's a totally different set of issues. But he did break up with her and he was being a jackass for awhile.
Story 1 - Op went overboard blaming himself for what happened. Sure. Sleeping with his brother's ex girlfriend was a dick move. Unpopular opinion but I think it's a justifed dick move given the explanation of how Evan was acting like a jerk to his own family. Maybe Evan was just lashing out from the fact his relationship didn't work out. Frankly, I don't really think that's any reason to take it out on op. However, op is ignoring the glaringly obvious fact (and so are a lot of people commenting on this story). Who cares if Evan still had feelings for his ex. She didn't feel the same or she wouldn't have moved right on to sleeping around with Evan's brother right AFTER they BROKE UP. They were only broken up after one month. She's a woman with a heart of ice to do that to Evan. Holding onto this grudge for five years even after the point Evan got into a new relationship and was about to get married is really stupid. I felt sorry for his wife if she has no idea how immature Evan and some of the family really are. Story 2 - lol I'm a huge skeptic this will work out. Story 3 - This is cheating. Op did the right thing texting her husband right away and encouraging others to do the same. Joanna cheated. It doesn't matter if she had been drinking or whatever excuse she wants to claim. Maid of honor needs to shut up. She sounds like a manipulative twat. Op didn't ruin Joanna's party. The maid of honor ruined it. I'm so disappointed op ended up covering for Joanna.
Story 1: OP may have cheated but at least he owns up to it unlike most cheaters. He did something that most consider unforgivable but him owning up to it is commendable and wrecked a relationship but at least his family is back together now despite this Story 2: Glad this relationship was repaired
He technically didn't cheat. After an argument with his brother digging at him for being single, the dude went out and slept with the brothers EX girlfriend. They weren't together when it happened but he knew his brother didn't want that relationship to end. Not saying that it wasn't a dick move to sleep with his brothers ex. But the entire family being that angry for 5 years is a bit much.
Let me get this straight, he feels unloved so he basically cheats (I consider watching pron cheating because it shows sexual desire for someone other than your partner, though I umderstand some people don't) and then snaps at her because he thinks she's cheating? Don't get me wrong, if they can work it out, that's good for them, but he's the one who sought pleasure from another woman in the form of pron instead of properly communicating with his wife other than "I want oral". I'm not talking about saying he wanted to sleep together more often (that was a good thing, communicating what he wanted) but he's the one who put an end to them sleeping together by stopping all sexual engagement, not her. The wife does deserve some blame for not engaging more often herself, but everything else is his mind running away with him and him making up scenarios in his head. She just doesn't have as high of a sex drive as him and being more passive in bed was simply because of her mindset (which she should have communicated but he also never brought up her being too passive). How long of watching adultery videos (he was specifically watching adultery, not a husband and wife) until he caved and did it? Pron is proven to be addictive and does things to the brain. I'm not saying that people always do what they see in pron but enough do for there to be a pattern.
Did you not hear the fact that the therapist was the one who told him to watch the pron? He said so himself he stopped initiating intimacy to see if she would, and she didn't. That's why he thought she was cheating on him or she didn't find him attractive anymore. So when she says "I have needs too." Then, of course, he is gonna say well why didn't you say/do anything to me?!
@alexfigie9701 Then that's a bad therapist. No therapist should tell you to watch pron. Him stopping intimacy had the opposite effect, her thinking he's feeling down but not knowing quite what because he didn't communicate to *_her_* that he wanted *_her_* to initiate. When he said he wanted more intimacy, she assumed that meant he was going to initiate more than before, which she was fine with. Her sex drive is low but it's not nonexistant. Of course, she would get upset that he would rather rub one out to another woman rather than her. Not only to another woman but to a video specifically about adultery because he admits to her that he wants to cheat but also doesn't. Why didn't the therapist instead tell him to tell his wife that he wanted her to be the one initiating more often? To communicate that he doesn't feel desired or that he felt like he wasn't having intimacy with a human being? Not something vague like "I want to sleep together more often"? This therapist needs a class in therapy. They didn't even help him get better with communication and instead told him to watch pron. That's a stupid therapist. Sex addiction because of pron leads a lot of people to the therapist because it eventually destroys their relationships.
@addictofanimation2923 You said yourself HE TOLD her he wanted more intimacy and ShE AsSUMed that meant he would initiate more, and when he didn't she thought oh well guess I shouldn't try either?? EVEN WHEN HE DID INITICIATE, SHE SAID HERSELF, she just lied there and didn't move. How is that showing affection or love for them? It makes it seem like she doesn't care and would have the same pleasure as reading a damn book. She said herself that she started the problem!! I agree that pron can lead to addiction and shouldn't be used often. I dont agree that it's cheating, or that it makes him a bad guy for looking for intimacy when his own wife wouldn't give it to him.
@alexfigie9701 He never told her he wanted *_her_* to initiate. She holds part of the blame but most of it is on him for not properly communicating it. Not everyone thinks the same or comes to the same conclusions. That's why communication is so important. Neither really properly communicated, but what's worse? Looking elsewhere other than your relationship for sexual pleasure or just laying in bed and not moving much during intimacy? "Being like a doll," as her husband said, is certainly disconcerting but he should properly communicate that instead of just wanting her to be a mind reader and immediately catch on. Everyone in my life, despite how well and how long we've known each other, can't just *_assume_* that the other person completely understands how we feel without proper communication. Me and my parent mainly have this issue, but we both try. The problem with her saying she's to blame is that she's putting all the blame on herself and isn't putting any on her husband. She's almost coddling him and acting like she's the problem and she's this horrible person when it was all a misunderstanding caused by mutual miscommunication. It's completely unbalanced. Sex just doesn't mean as much to her as it does her husband and her mindset about "just laying there and letting her man use her" was caused by something that was never addressed. Stimulus during sex is bound to get a reaction out of you, more than just laying there. She probably needs a therapist more than him for a different issue she doesn't seem to be addressing here. She doesn't seem like a completely reliable narrator. (This is just a theory, not fact. I won't bare false witness about this). At the end of the day, people aren't mind readers and we don't all think the same. We all have vastly different ways of thinking that lead to us coming to different conclusions. Communication is key for relationships to survive. Both failed but I truly believe the husband failed worse.
@addictofanimation2923 ok re watch the video because you are either blind and/or deaf. SHE CLEARLY SAID IN THE BEGINNING THAT HE ASKED FOR HER TO INITIATE and give oral when he does for her. He clearly tried to CommUnICATe and she said herself she thought that just meant oral and more kisses. You CLEARLY only have a thing about the pron and that's fine but that doesn't make him the bad guy.
Story 1: Whoever decided to use a wedding to try to repair a relationship is the asshole. Let the wedding be a wedding.
it was the person getting married
Considering it was the OP who screwed up in the first place, he doesn’t have a lot of wiggle room.
Op did not ruin Joanna's party. Joanna ruined her own life. MOH set Joanna's stupid behind up, and she fell right on into it. A real friend would not encourage you to cheat on your fiance. I feel for OP and the other women who were put in that situation. I have 0 sympathy for Joanna. MOH is an AH. Joanna needs to make better choices.
I also think Joanna was orally servicing the stripper as well. I don't believe she was just sitting there with a naked man's crotch in her face doing nothing. Op was nice not to totally out her. But, I don't know if I would have been. Dude was a sex worker. He could have had an STD. She could have caught it and passed it to her fiance. SMH.
I mean Joanna did block the MOH and probably banned her from the wedding, so is that enough of a better choice?
Would she have if she wasn't forced to by her fiance, though? Probably not. She would have stayed friends and kept that secret.
First story isn't even fair to OP. they were broken up, there was no cheating. Last story, Joanna better tell the others' husbands
There is a bro code that you don't sleep with your bro's ex, and I can understand that Evan feels betrayed, but you're right that this isn't cheating.... it is something much more forgivable.
Edit: the fact that Evan broke it off makes it even more forgivable, while the acts Evan made to push OP into the boinking makes Evan a total TA
You just don't EVER date your brother's ex. EVER. If your brother wants to reconnect, it's his timeliness, no one else's.
If you Had Cheated, YOU WOULD DESERVE NO RELATIONSHIP. But, One WeekIs Still Close.
@@Maninawigno that’s not true the bro code is when your sleep with your friend’s sister not sleeping with your brothers ex
Story 3: If something can be destroyed by the truth, it should be
Last story: so op downplayed and lied about what Joanna did and made sure Jason married a cheater. Happily ever after ❤
Why do 304s use "girl code" to breed infidelity. Last time I checked, the bro code says "a bro will stand up for another bro even against themselves." Meaning if your decision is about to ruin your life (like cheating), bro code says speak up.
@@Maninawig I mean it's a fact that girls would like to take side of other girl even if she's guilty. I'm not saying that all girls would but they definitely would like to. So ig they just saw bro code and said "oh yeah girl code 🤷🏻♀️"
@@experiencedotaku171
That does make for an interesting conflict of interest though, as things like the Me2 movement was about standing up for victims... but how does one do that and abide by the girl code when the SA was done by a female?
That might explain the dismissive nature towards different crimes
Story 1: Wait.... sinething does not compute....
OP slepr with his step bro Ex, there is no relationship, but all of a sudden step bro is inviting him to a wedding and the other Step bto is threatening to go NC if OP dosent come?
Something aint right
Its a different step brother.
He slept with stepbro1's (younger step brother) ex - who he didn't want to break up with - and stepbro2 (older stepbro) threatened to go NC with him if he didn't go to the wedding after OP found out stepbro1 was there and didn't want to ruin the wedding for him.
hate to say it but that poor wife was never going to manage a normal sex life without some kind of meltdown. She was literally taught intimacy wrong.
I'm still mad about this the next day. Husband was a bit TA, but only a bit because I get that our society doesn't talk about this stuff or the logistics of s3x. Like I'm sorry but people actually DO NEED to learn how it works. And if they're taught wrong, they're not going to suddenly "fix" it because you told them, "initiate more."
Goodness! I so wonder what mess she grew up in. It can even not be an intense religious setting. My family was secular but one generation back there was some really messy religious stuff that was hidden from me.
S3 - she cheated and OP covered for her
Hate it when people blame alcohol for cheating, I've been drunk a few times, yet I've never cheated on my partner at the time no matter how drunk I've been (even when I was flat out so drunk I needed to be practically carried home, I still never cheated, despite one of my then bf friends hitting on me to see if I'd cheat, I didn't cheat and pushed him away) you will only cheat if your that kind of person and alcohol has nothing to do with it it's all to do with the fact that you have no morals. Joanna ruined her own life noone held a gun to her head and told her to cheat
How do you just accidentally sleep with your step brothers ex what did you slip and fall on top of her 😂 I would never forgive such a betrayal
Its an ex how is that a betrayal? Evan ran his mouth and cried when Op got him back.
He did make it clear what hapoebed, by accident he means his logic was not sound, nor was his mental state when he did the act. Thry were apart for a month, the two brothers had been fighting, he tried to be there for his brither his brother mocked him for not even having a gf in the first place in a moment of weakness he acted.
They seem to be reconsiling
He was drunk, they were arguing, they 2 were apart, he wasn't in the right mind. Being mocked for not having a girl was the straw that broke the camel's back and in a state of rage he enacted the cheating. OP at least has taken responsibility for it which commendable, probably not forgivable but commendable. Most cheaters deflect the blame or take the blame at first but then end it with "But..." implying they are going to imply it is someone else's fault.
Story 1 wtf, the stepbrother was not dating her ATM it is not cheating. IDK why he wants a relationship with that stepbrother
@@DragonMedic20going after anyone your bros were interested in or in a relationship in is a no go. there are plenty of fish in the sea to dine on.
#3 screamed; the bride to be was doing something freaky. She might have wanted to 'be' a good friend, but she should have 'been' a good friend
I’m sorry, but Evan is a freaking baby. Basically cutting out his brother from the rest of the family _for years_ because OP (checks notes…)
Slept with his ex that *_he broke up with_* after *_he insulted OP_* for being single.
Seriously, eff him. 🙄
he broke bro code. OP is def an ass.
@@samiulhuda4001true, but Evan also broke the bro code:
A bro never weaponizes another bro's insecurities. That is just a low blow.
Second, while bro doesn't sleep with another bro's ex, one of the loopholes is if the bro (Evan) was the one to break it off. It relinquishes the dibs.
So if we are looking at faults, oP would be 75%TA, but Evan would be 125% TA.
@@samiulhuda4001fuck the bro code, it's just an excuse for people to be assholes and get away with it.
@@Maninawigdude that’s not part of the bro code you not suppose to sleep with your friends sister not hooking off with you brothers ex
@@samiulhuda4001😂😂😂😂, no. As long as he didn't cause the break up, she's fair game. The real salient issue is that he knew his brother would be upset by it, and so he did it specifically to hurt him. That's the dick move here. If he was legitimately interested in the woman, then that's a totally different set of issues. But he did break up with her and he was being a jackass for awhile.
Story 1 - Op went overboard blaming himself for what happened. Sure. Sleeping with his brother's ex girlfriend was a dick move. Unpopular opinion but I think it's a justifed dick move given the explanation of how Evan was acting like a jerk to his own family. Maybe Evan was just lashing out from the fact his relationship didn't work out. Frankly, I don't really think that's any reason to take it out on op.
However, op is ignoring the glaringly obvious fact (and so are a lot of people commenting on this story). Who cares if Evan still had feelings for his ex. She didn't feel the same or she wouldn't have moved right on to sleeping around with Evan's brother right AFTER they BROKE UP. They were only broken up after one month. She's a woman with a heart of ice to do that to Evan. Holding onto this grudge for five years even after the point Evan got into a new relationship and was about to get married is really stupid. I felt sorry for his wife if she has no idea how immature Evan and some of the family really are.
Story 2 - lol I'm a huge skeptic this will work out.
Story 3 - This is cheating. Op did the right thing texting her husband right away and encouraging others to do the same. Joanna cheated. It doesn't matter if she had been drinking or whatever excuse she wants to claim. Maid of honor needs to shut up. She sounds like a manipulative twat. Op didn't ruin Joanna's party. The maid of honor ruined it. I'm so disappointed op ended up covering for Joanna.
20:08 naw, ruin it!
Joanna got off way too easy
Story 3: Let's just classify this under... "drunk mistake"
I would have asked to paided back. Frist class tickets
Story 1: OP may have cheated but at least he owns up to it unlike most cheaters. He did something that most consider unforgivable but him owning up to it is commendable and wrecked a relationship but at least his family is back together now despite this
Story 2: Glad this relationship was repaired
He technically didn't cheat. After an argument with his brother digging at him for being single, the dude went out and slept with the brothers EX girlfriend. They weren't together when it happened but he knew his brother didn't want that relationship to end.
Not saying that it wasn't a dick move to sleep with his brothers ex. But the entire family being that angry for 5 years is a bit much.
Let me get this straight, he feels unloved so he basically cheats (I consider watching pron cheating because it shows sexual desire for someone other than your partner, though I umderstand some people don't) and then snaps at her because he thinks she's cheating? Don't get me wrong, if they can work it out, that's good for them, but he's the one who sought pleasure from another woman in the form of pron instead of properly communicating with his wife other than "I want oral". I'm not talking about saying he wanted to sleep together more often (that was a good thing, communicating what he wanted) but he's the one who put an end to them sleeping together by stopping all sexual engagement, not her. The wife does deserve some blame for not engaging more often herself, but everything else is his mind running away with him and him making up scenarios in his head. She just doesn't have as high of a sex drive as him and being more passive in bed was simply because of her mindset (which she should have communicated but he also never brought up her being too passive). How long of watching adultery videos (he was specifically watching adultery, not a husband and wife) until he caved and did it? Pron is proven to be addictive and does things to the brain. I'm not saying that people always do what they see in pron but enough do for there to be a pattern.
Did you not hear the fact that the therapist was the one who told him to watch the pron? He said so himself he stopped initiating intimacy to see if she would, and she didn't. That's why he thought she was cheating on him or she didn't find him attractive anymore. So when she says "I have needs too." Then, of course, he is gonna say well why didn't you say/do anything to me?!
@alexfigie9701 Then that's a bad therapist. No therapist should tell you to watch pron. Him stopping intimacy had the opposite effect, her thinking he's feeling down but not knowing quite what because he didn't communicate to *_her_* that he wanted *_her_* to initiate. When he said he wanted more intimacy, she assumed that meant he was going to initiate more than before, which she was fine with. Her sex drive is low but it's not nonexistant. Of course, she would get upset that he would rather rub one out to another woman rather than her. Not only to another woman but to a video specifically about adultery because he admits to her that he wants to cheat but also doesn't. Why didn't the therapist instead tell him to tell his wife that he wanted her to be the one initiating more often? To communicate that he doesn't feel desired or that he felt like he wasn't having intimacy with a human being? Not something vague like "I want to sleep together more often"? This therapist needs a class in therapy. They didn't even help him get better with communication and instead told him to watch pron. That's a stupid therapist. Sex addiction because of pron leads a lot of people to the therapist because it eventually destroys their relationships.
@addictofanimation2923 You said yourself HE TOLD her he wanted more intimacy and ShE AsSUMed that meant he would initiate more, and when he didn't she thought oh well guess I shouldn't try either?? EVEN WHEN HE DID INITICIATE, SHE SAID HERSELF, she just lied there and didn't move. How is that showing affection or love for them? It makes it seem like she doesn't care and would have the same pleasure as reading a damn book. She said herself that she started the problem!! I agree that pron can lead to addiction and shouldn't be used often. I dont agree that it's cheating, or that it makes him a bad guy for looking for intimacy when his own wife wouldn't give it to him.
@alexfigie9701 He never told her he wanted *_her_* to initiate. She holds part of the blame but most of it is on him for not properly communicating it. Not everyone thinks the same or comes to the same conclusions. That's why communication is so important. Neither really properly communicated, but what's worse? Looking elsewhere other than your relationship for sexual pleasure or just laying in bed and not moving much during intimacy? "Being like a doll," as her husband said, is certainly disconcerting but he should properly communicate that instead of just wanting her to be a mind reader and immediately catch on.
Everyone in my life, despite how well and how long we've known each other, can't just *_assume_* that the other person completely understands how we feel without proper communication. Me and my parent mainly have this issue, but we both try.
The problem with her saying she's to blame is that she's putting all the blame on herself and isn't putting any on her husband. She's almost coddling him and acting like she's the problem and she's this horrible person when it was all a misunderstanding caused by mutual miscommunication. It's completely unbalanced. Sex just doesn't mean as much to her as it does her husband and her mindset about "just laying there and letting her man use her" was caused by something that was never addressed. Stimulus during sex is bound to get a reaction out of you, more than just laying there. She probably needs a therapist more than him for a different issue she doesn't seem to be addressing here. She doesn't seem like a completely reliable narrator. (This is just a theory, not fact. I won't bare false witness about this).
At the end of the day, people aren't mind readers and we don't all think the same. We all have vastly different ways of thinking that lead to us coming to different conclusions. Communication is key for relationships to survive. Both failed but I truly believe the husband failed worse.
@addictofanimation2923 ok re watch the video because you are either blind and/or deaf. SHE CLEARLY SAID IN THE BEGINNING THAT HE ASKED FOR HER TO INITIATE and give oral when he does for her. He clearly tried to CommUnICATe and she said herself she thought that just meant oral and more kisses. You CLEARLY only have a thing about the pron and that's fine but that doesn't make him the bad guy.