Links to Angelo's book, a full transcript, podcast, and other episodes in our Awakening series: zdoggmd.com/self-inquiry 00:00 Intro 00:37 Meditation Vs. inquiry, what’s the purpose of inquiry 05:10 Who are you? 08:41 Hitting the fear barrier, the doubt barrier, the thought trap 16:50 Inquiry and the identity shift of awakening, dissolution of ego 19:53 Resistance & shadow 24:27 Obstructing beliefs/thoughts common to the process 27:35 Self-inquiry vs. surrendered inquiry into the nature of reality post awakening, non-duality 32:10 Surrendering to unfiltered, self-less reality 36:12 Why the smartest people have the most trouble with this 38:20 Investigating the imagined self, the science of no-self 41:39 Can the experience of unfiltered reality be destabilizing , the goal of liberation
just so you know, its technically imossible to ""wake up"" if you are doing it alone, nobody can judge self proper, when you dont know the "keys" to judge it. And you cant get it for free, cant get it without unimaginably hard work, and you also cant buy it. Simple as that. And almost every kind of meditation ive ever seen is mostly shallow understanding how it works, all of them need "mantras" when you think about it how meditation works, they just NEVER tell you about it, and nobody says the good mantas... instead everyone chooses their own mantra, which is bad. for third point, the way non-duality is being taught to people is wrong, its all in the ancient books, vedas, they say we can be in state of non duality only half of the "all time", and its NOT the final understanding how universe works, like those fanatics usualy think its absolute truth already.. Everything they say about "no-self" is stupid because souls cant stop to exist individually, its all in the ancient teachings, available to read by anyone who wants, its called "brahma realization level" that nonduality thing and no-self, and its not finished realization... after state of nonduality comes, everyone will reincarnate anyway. again, people are not looking for truth, everyone only learns what they WANT.. People are silly, and inherently ignorant. and what the hell even is that he thinks "" I am the smartest person i know, not them"" :D he does not know his place in line, and does not understand what ""liberation"" even is, because the most advanced souls dont want liberation at all, but people dont even read the source books for all of that knowledge, they only read what they want, in parts, being kinda fanatic often, nobody reads the summary of Vedas. read about water fluoridation, almost all of you americans have literally dead brain, dead pineal gland responsible for understanding the reality, intuition and all kinds of things, "the third eye", its just not possible for you to be "spiritual", all you have is your shallow understanding bonus look at Dr. Strangelove (4/8) Movie CLIP - Water and Commies (1964) HD
As Angelo was talking about the fear barrier, I slammed right into it. When I focused on the sensations, they seemed to intensify, and I backed off. Now I'm determined to know what's beyond that. This work you guys are doing is life changing, truly.
One foot in one world, the other in another: the very best way to describe continuing to live life after that initial awakening process. "What am I supposed to do now?" Chop wood, carry water. 💕
There are times when as soon as i begin to concentrate and reach at state of absorbtion in my meditation a rush of fear shows itself and im instantly seated back in the mind
Hey ZDoggMD. This is my first time listening to Dr. DiLullo talk on your channel. In my experience the process of self-enquiry historically has been outlined in classic Advaita (Non-dual) Vedanta (Experience/Knowledge) that's typically associated with Hinduism. I've been a Vedanta student for 15 years and have had every experience that Dr. Di has described, and then some. Recently, one of my teachers stated that, "Most people spend so much time in meditation and studying philosophy in order to empty the vast contents from the cup of the ego/mind/body. While these are definitely worthy pursuits, the goal of Vedanta is to realize/experience that you aren't the cup, then only pure conscious awareness permanently remains." This analogy helped me a lot. Thanks for bringing a western view and face to these universal ancient pursuits.
At 18:05 I melted into the idea that I am not interacting with anything, I am just it, the thing. I had to pause the video and just sit here for a minute. Thank you.
Wait, wait! This is too much! Totally feel your mental exhaustion Z! That's the way I feel many times after listening to Angelo's talks... Fascinating conversation as always... I'm re-reading Angelo's book and working on one chapter at a time, highlighting and making notes... taking "baby steps" seem to work better for me... 🙏❤
Lesson number one: Nothing I see means anything Lesson number two: I have given everything I see, all the meaning it holds for me. What a helpful breakdown for my ACIM lessons. Particularly the dripping of the stories about a table. Thank you!
Side note, I’m aware the table was an example/illustration of applying the mental practice of inquiry. It’s not about the table/cup/body etc. but the one observing and projecting it.
One cannot keep looking, looking, looking because finally one has to give in to one Self and that can only by having faith (or not) and see where it all ends. Keep looking is an ego act. Intelligent people have this (nasty) tendency to overestimate logic and will finally arrive at a point where they lose themselves in their automatic, intuitive side. And this takes normally more than one life. No one is a "beginner" because we all have our place in the fabric of our reality which is a child of the Truth. As an individuated entity it will never be able to encompass Truth because it is creating Reality in it. Thanks for the video! Happy Hologram
I started doing this inquiry (and forgive me if this is already described elsewhere) and it has really opened up some great space for me. Usually when I’m at work, I’ll go walk to grab some coffee or water and the hallway is ping and is typically empty (I work nights) and as I’m walking I ask myself “who is walking? Or How am I walking “ It was a very opening revelation when I saw that I could walk somewhere and actively think “stop walking or hop on one foot” and my body just continued walking. It helped me realize that there’s no actual thinker and doer and that “I” exist somewhere past those thoughts. Anyways. I’d love to hear anyone’s feedback on that. ZDogg and Angelo thank you for all your videos 😊🤘
As a curious creature, I've always pushed myself question everything, myself especially (thanks cPTSD). The growth and healing has been beautifully painful & awe-inspiring
Angelo’s book is great. He is a great teacher and has his own style of trying to explain self Realization in a fantastic way. The Ancient Sages and Masters are all watching him as he spreads it out among all those who are ready to hear his message. DIVINE TIMING DIVINE TIGHT ACTION Blessings Angelo 🙏🏻. Keep up the good work. I share your videos whenever I have the opportunity.
But... But... You make it sound as if the ancient sages and masters are all separate egos watching us all here learn what they know. Aren't we already one with them/him/her/it?
These videos you made with Angelo are sooo potent, Dr. Z! They make me tear up... Found my way here thru Reddit... Thank you so much for arranging all the conditions so this could happen and all of us can benefit from this great work! ❤❤❤
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I love the question ‘what does it feel like to be me right now?’… I often ask my friends to ask me that and set a timer for 3 minutes… Once I’ve recognised and named sensation, thoughts and emotion, I find the ‘just this’… unnamable, empty, gently joyful. Time stops and when I come back, what is in front of me feels surprising and looks fresh and different.
I have been watching Angelo’s videos….usually more than once, because I can never grasp anything the first time I find 🙄….I also like this venue with Dr Z. Thanks for the videos, both of you. I struggle due to a lifelong severe SPD…skeptical personality disorder😂🤣. . Not cynical, just skeptical, yet curious as hell…what a dichotomy. I am still open to it all. Never say never has always been my motto. So let’s dive in. 😊
I spent 3 days all 24 hrs looking for answer to” who are you?” At an Ashram seriously 😳 hardest thing l had ever done. Not having a label any more is amazing than anything else I have ever experienced. Watching and listening to you both talking about what is very different and difficult trying to navigate. I have never talked really about my experience as it’s beyond expectations.
I never knew until my late forties that I can just ask myself this question and truly the answers came back for me in the astral. I was wide awake remembered everything. I learned why I’m here and who I really am. So yea it works! My world has taken a completely different path as a result. I also meditate but the astral or just before sleeping self review of my day and asking questions to God before sleep is the most powerful technique I’ve found outside of meditation.
Self-Inquiry was developed by Nargajuna, (150-250), and used extensively in most Buddhist Schools. It's a valuable approach but is a preparatory technique. My advice: investigate all available methods for tapping into and merging with The Self (Ramana Maharshi's term). Complementary to Self-Inquiry would be silent meditation and also accessing "Mahamritunjaya mantra - Sacred Sounds Choir" and listening to it for 5 min per day for at least two weeks. Enjoy the Pure Silence of the Absolute, Sat-Chit-Ananda..
Holy smoke balls no awakening gurus have ever put the right words to describe my experience as y'all. 2 weeks ago I did mindfulness meditation and body-scan for about 8 hours. That night I went clubbing with my friend and I could barely talk to anyone cos thoughts were not entering my head. Ever since I have way less desire to do the things I usually do. I feel physically and mentally light and I basically just want to walk around giggling all day. Thanks Zdogg and Angelo
I find a lot of my fears are related to physical survival of self and family that is completely reasonable on it's surface that I suddely sense I need to let go while listening to this.
It’s frustrating how close they are. A refusal to integrate this lovely information with solid psychological introspection prevents them from getting to this deeper truth: We CAN find resistance. We resist pain. When we resist pain, we create suffering. Pain (physical and emotional) is an inevitable by-product of engagement in the world. Suffering is what occurs when we attempt to avoid that pain. The shadow is a psychic repository of our patterned/habitual resistance to pain. So, “shadow work” is reconnecting with the old pain while also letting go of the old resistance patterns. That non-dual space mentioned is a clean field from which we can move into introspection from spaciousness, rather than fear-based contraction. We can’t live in the contentless space of the non-dual forever. We use that space to create what we actually want.
Thanks for this fab interview. Yes, that fear response to a relaxed empty body. I literally fall to the ground, spinning, feel cross eyed. Only happens after meditation tho and is short lived. Thanks for both of your soft voices too. Xx
I’ve experienced something like this “flow state” and the dissolving of consciousness (“I am all the things all the time,”) but I sort of struggle with the question of “why is this important?” And “why bother?” Even if my ego were to dissolve and my consciousness were to merge with the full consciousness of reality, I still need to get up and go to work at 8am tomorrow morning. My kids still need taken care of until they’re older. Ironically, the lack of distraction can be a distraction from the people and things around us.
Because "Ego Death" and "consciousness of reality" (or "universal consciousness" if you like) is at best a misrepresentation, at worst, a misunderstanding. "Ego death" is not the destination, it is a footprint on our path of growth as we get better at understanding our continually evolving place in existence and how to navigate this particular path. "Consciousness of reality", or "universal consciousness " is understanding from a state of perceptual overload. ...again, not a destination. As to your question of "Why is it important?" ...that is more difficult to explain. Have you seen a person break down in tears of overwhelming joy? Maybe they could not hear, but, because of medical advancements can, for the first time in their lives, hear their young child call their name. Prior to that, how would you accurately describe all that goes along with that experience? How would you describe that that experience is not the destination, but a stepping stone to the utilization of that tool to achieve much greater things that cannot even be fathomed without that tool? "Why is it important?" ...because, used properly, that tool, along with others, can help make your existence unimaginably better.
Who you are is not just "boundless" horizontally, it's also boundless vertically. What I mean by that is that the essence of awareness (who we are) being recognized and even stabilized is not enough for "permanent liberation." Karma (the karmic process) is very real and very subtle. We cannot be fully free of the ego until we exhaust our karma - which are trace tendencies left within the mind from past ego-based actions. We can awaken in this life and awakening can be a pleasant state but states are not permanent. In death all states get exposed and reduced and if karmas have not been "resolved" they will cause the mind to again identify as an ego and so an embodiment.. aka "rebirth." It's nothing in THIS life that we should be fearful of, but after death we will not be fully in control of our consciousness unless the traces of karmic influences have been totally cleared away. The way this is done is through action, specifically SELFLESS action. In the Indian traditions this is called "karma yoga" and it is just as necessary as "self inquiry" and even as "awakening" itself. If true liberation is what you seek then do not stop at mere inquiry or awakening, you must also deal with the residual effects left from your non awakening. Start living as an awakened being today, this moment.
Fantastic, I’ve listened to this twice now. The first time my thoughts kept commenting and I missed half of the conversation. Currently reading the chapter on inquiry, so very relevant.
I love you Dr. Angelo 👏 😄 How many times I've stood infront of that door... And yet here I am. One foot inside one foot outside. But weirdly there's these strong winds that are kinda making it hard to keep the balance lol. The more inflated the ego, the more wind you catch I suppose 😁
Everybody is Pure Consciousness, with "superimpositions" of various projections of reality into a composite, that is ultimately Consciousness. Obviously, the so-called "lower" notion of the self continues on it's own level. (but this lower level is simply a projection of Consciousness within Itself).
I think of animals, humans being in that classification as a "collection" of consciousness held together by the same forces that shape planets and for lack of a better word "control" the direction they move in and the shape that movement makes. We as humans along with other animals and living creatures are an expression and collection of this consciousness and while in this "collection" (confined inside a body) we have a unique perspective of the world and can collect information from our vantage point, our own perspective. No two living creatures, animals -including humans share the same exact experiences nor thoughts. By consciousness separating itself into "collection" or "bundles" (us) we get to experience a unique life and collect information that one cannot by themselves. It is as though the universe is exploring itself and learning through us even though we don't truly exist on our own an illusion of individuality persists while we are "alive" inhabit this body/ in this bundle of consciousness. We are but a part of something much larger but it is very hard to see that while in this body. Analogy time. Consciousness is like the ocean and a body like an empty glass once the glass is filled with some ocean water then the glass has a small amount of ocean water and fills the glass taking the shape of the glass taking on it's characteristics. The ocean water has not become the glass the ocean has mearly conformed to the vessel for a time. Once the glass has broken and the water goes back into the ocean it is once again part of the whole. Like with us once we die our consciousness goes back into the vast consciousness as a whole. So yes we are all the same consciousness but have different perspectives and experiences that we gleam while alive. When our bodies die that knowledge/experience will be flow back into the ocean of consciousness.
Such amazing insight. I have flashes of Heaven when I listen to Dr. Dilullo. ZDoggMD enhances the rush of excitement. I was depressed before I listened and now I feel nice. I need to listen to this at least 10 more times because it is so new.
Amazing comment I agree. Almost everyone I know thinks this is crazy, but I think it might be the most important thing in this existence we have arrived in.
Keep it coming! These are the INCREDIBLE! Somehow it can feel like the algorithm is its own built in form of a resistance barrier to access the deep stuff, but man this is so good
Fan F-----g tastic; Absolute best non-dual convo EVER. Angelo I bought your book today and it cant arrive soon enough. I love your urgency/focus, thank you guys!
Please redo this show but through the lens of adolescence. I would love to here how we can help teens develop this awareness before they are filled with ego.
Self develops significantly earlier than ego, and I don't think there is a way to take control to prevent that from happening in people. You cannot safe people from their suffering, most you can do is look closer and closer at your own suffering, that'll extrapolate out and benefit everyone that comes into contact with you, including teens.
How can you float to the surface before diving deep into ego? Wouldn't you just get stuck being an ego-less infant if you never know the suffering of being a seperate self? Why not just skip over the human experience altogether? Wouldn't the ideal solution be to never be born in the first place?
The mind becoming calm comes with meditation, if you do this consistently and the correct way, it will take you to other realms, open you mind to new understanding of life and things; also empties your mind of beliefs, relieves you from beliefs and indoctrination.
Don't you just love it when the mind clicks and have insights. When you sit back and smile while they talk because you come home step by step to the truth that the minds can't even understand xD
I think there are a lot of deeply realized teachers now. The Internet and perhaps the way suffering goes in this world now has really spread this option of the realization pathless path. I think different paintings have there different places. Angelo definitely points more in a Zen type of way. But other ways of pointing can be useful for other people, cause our conditioning is quite unique, even when we're all sharing the same essence/nature. For me Angelo has had the clearest pointing aswell though
I were taught that meditation is ‘focus without opinion’. That would I think automatically take the Ego out of the equation, as opinion comes from the Ego. His statement that Ego loves meditation makes no sense.
I once read in 'A Course For Miracles' the ego only knows two states: It vascilates between being vicious and suspicious - but that doesn't seem to be a very happy way to exist imo. I have been exploring methods of self inquiry since childhood. My experience taught me 'ego complex' is a difficult, slippery, and often exhausting thing to master without diving deep into the emotional/spiritual parts of iurselves. I have noticed over the years, 'happy' isn't always where we learn the most valuable lessons for our personal growth. Counter intuitive as it seems, it's usually when I surrender to my higher conscious self where I may have to go through deep suffering (sometimes), but if I am willing to listen and to learn, the knowledge & confidence I gain is worth its weight in gold! -my 2¢😊
I think the distinction that's being lost about meditation is "for what purpose?" That's something usually isn't stated. People hear "meditation" and think "altered state" or "higher plane of consciousness." It's some concept. They might associate it with "Transcendental" which doesn't describe anything concrete. To me, it's guided mindfulness meditation, and the purpose is to reach a level of stillness that thoughts _can_ be detected/discerned as they enter your mind (and then a veto power exercised). The benefit is gaining experience with the difference between myself and myself thinking. Not knowing that difference, not being familiar with thoughts entering my mind (and what it's like to have no thought), then thoughts cascade from one to many, and a loud rumination of dire importance, affecting me without me realizing it, or how it started. It is transcendental, but I'm transcending myself. Most people don't think in those terms when they hear "meditation." I feel like the meditation is the least of it. It's the "playing catch" with your subconcious from whence thoughts emerge. Developing that skill/recognition, and the ability to choose not to think about something right now (not that the thought is bad, or should be resisted. Just "not now."). The meditative part of it just helps get that practice going. After it's done for a while, and a person has gained familiarity with those brief (1/2 second) periods between thoughts, they can be more aware as they're doing anything (without meditation). The periods become longer (the veto power is more proficient. I like to think of it as the "agent self" of psychology is more awake and being responsible instead of snoozing in the back seat while the false self confabulates without the adult in the room.). To me, the goal is to be aware of thoughts as they emerge. And, meditation is just the first step to developing that awareness. Training wheels. It's not the meditation that is useful. It's the being familiar with thoughts entering the mind, and what it's like without them. I am not my thoughts (and they can takeover if I don't have this awareness of them).
I believe theres an important distinction about meditation to make as to the concept of self inquiry theres active meditation choiceless awareness where questions about oneself might arise.then theres passive meditation where the concept is for the quieting or no mind
Very potent conversation ! This is the very first time I met Dr. Angelo . The "funny" thing is that while listening to Dr Angelo at the same time I was enjoying some relaxation from my ego, I was trying to fit in his thought to some philosophy I know, instead of just letting it go ... and enjoy .. I guess is - in my case - the last strategy of the ego, that is, to label, to put in some shelf ...because the ego felt threathned to disolve itself into an experience of nonduality .... Does it make sense to anyone ? Thanks a lot for the video !!
Inquiry is OK but it's a mental process. Transcend mental processes altogether by using the foremost Shiva mantra (in the Rig Veda). No problem. Access"Mahamritunjaya mantra - Sacred Sounds Choir" , and listen to it for 5 min per day for at least 2 weeks. You'll eventually merge into Pure Consciousness, Sat-Chit-Ananda.
@8:44: Oh yeah, "Inquiry" can definitely trigger a nasty "panic attack" difficult to navigate if you're not under the auspices of a Master who's already "pushed-through." Years ago in my 30's I did a rather dangerous two-week experiment in "mindfulness" whilst going about my normal daily routine, partly inspired by Eckhart Tolle's "The Power of Now." While totally immersed in the world, working and interacting with others (ugh), I secretly began a regimen of mentally asking "Who's thinking this thought? Who's feeling this feeling?" every time I had a thought or caught myself in a "mind-play." If the mind wanted to think, I would strong-arm it every moment I could into looping-back on-itself, using it's energy against itself with varying forms of the "Question:" Who's aware of this thought? This effectively short-circuited things into an increasingly uneasy silence... Over the days this intensely-focused activity of interrupting almost every thought, every day-dream with the "Question" caused my monkey-mind to slow. Like a flea-bitten chimp in a tree, moodily scratching it's ass, picking it's nose and barring it's teeth at me, my mind reluctantly stilled. But this was in an unpleasantly smouldering, radioactive sort-of-way. (When I was a little kid I remembered thinking and processing information in a sort of "mental short-hand" rich in metaphorical imagery that was information-dense but hard to translate into words, only later as an adult to degrade into the plodding tele-type _verbalized_ thought we all engage in. I began to revert back to that earlier form of mental processing as the days wore on, and when I did have a verbalized thought, it felt distressingly _close,_ like a voice in my ear, almost disassociated, very loud. Mental images also tended to become crisper as well). Otherwise I was able to halt almost all mental-chatter - masturbation also ceased - (for the "Question" interfered: who was jacking?) as I felt my mind beginning to twist and buckle under this hard-core fight for alertness, to stay afloat and not subsume into the unconscious rivers of thought, _at all costs._ It didn't work out well. Finally one evening after about ten days of this, I was retiring to bed feeling very weird, unearthly and on the edge of something I couldn't articulate. My brain felt starved for input. I turned off my light, closed my eyes and waited for sleep to take me. Flashing lights like fireworks began to cascade in my mind's eye, energy began to surge through my nerves and I became aware of a very tiny but ferocious spark of un-dying, un-sleeping awareness, burning deep in the meat of my brain...that I _could not shut-off._ I could not escape into blissful regenerative sleep with that freaky light, burning-away in the middle of my awareness. I have to work for a living. Can't work without sleep! This all quickly escalated into what felt like a bad acid trip, as more energy began to surge through me and felt my mind wanting to tear free from it's moorings. I realized I was like a computer laptop trying to reboot while plugged into a 600 volt mains. There was no guarantee that I'd "reboot whole" -I realized I went about things all wrong without having prepared a proper solid foundation...I did not want to reconstitute as a mad paramahamsa. I have to work and maintain my existence. I did not want to get committed to a psyche ward. I flew out of bed and crouched into a grounding mudra, shaking like an old dog and praying to become a monkey's uncle. I fought with all my might and refused surrender into what I feared was madness. Eventually the phenomena wound-down, but I was quits with any sort of meditation/inquiry practice for a long time after that. So I'm kinda leery now. I'd risk it again, but it'd have to be in the right context; I'd have to be baby-sat by someone who's already gone through it and not having to worry about working for a living. I doubt I can afford to spend the next few years as a blissed-out pile of goo sitting on a park bench, watching the world roll-by into oblivion.
No one knows and most people only imagine traits that don't actually have. Nothing you are is unique to you, you are habits ideas politics and beliefs an algorithm of information you recieved due to exposure to others.
I am loving the introduction of all this material on this platform!!!! It’s so fascinating to hear various experiences and pathways to awakening! I have found the Nature of Personal Reality (Jane Robert’s - Seth material) very enlightening and beautiful in terms of illuminating obvious fatal flaws in our approach to health and medicine!!!!
I bought the book and honestly loved the concept at first, and it made so much sense, but now... the "fear response" just sounds like a panic attack (of which I'm familiar with), and if it is a panic attack the professional advice is typically to just sit with it, so now I'm wondering if this is all just an elaborate construction to deal with an anxiety disorder and the fear of death/ oblivion. 🤷♀️
Thank you so much ZDoggMD for bringing Dr. DiLullo to our attention, I was also hugely influenced by "The Power Of Now" and had a big shift in my understanding of who I am and what is reality but did not seem to find the practical tools to make the shift from knowing it's there intellectually to actually be able to go "to the other side". Dr. DiLullo seems to be the missing link when he provide practical tools and feedbacks that can help people make the shift, and your conversations are great since you convey exactly what someone who is on the path but yet did not had the real shift would think and want to know. I have a question to him, that maybe will resonate sometimes in your future conversations. When Dr. DiLullo say that the street and you are the same, and say "what a thought is, versus what you actually experiencing with your senses". There is something that I have a problem understanding, since if I have a pain in my leg, would the street feel it? if someone knock on my door, I can hear it with my ears but would I feel it as if the hand is knocking on me? The fact that we do have senses which are bound to our specific body and bring only the information that our limited body can be in contact with, how does it goes together with a boundless feeling of reality that is not limited to any place or anything? Maybe he already answered it and maybe this is not the right question to ask, but I find that this is something that lingers in my mind when ever I try to understand the nature of awakening(and off course it is a thought:) Thanks!
THIs host is the best I have listened to. He’s truly trying to explain the big secret. Geez ILL SAY wHAT NO ONe ELSE will After 900 shows figuring out the what the words that say nothing mean!! And from the host NOT the guest. I am unsure he wants anyone else to wake up. There has got to be a better way to explain this without TELLiNG the rest of us!! Good lord speak english please. 🙏
I have listened to a few of your videos with Angelo and whenever he talks about waking up I’m just like 😵💫 I feel like I’m too dumb for this. I can meditate and let go for a while, but eventually I go back to suffering. Like feels so difficult and unfulfilling 99.9% of the time and it feels like a lot work. I have to fight the thought that dying would be easier on a daily basis. I feel so alone, unlovable, and worthless. It feels like there is something intrinsically wrong/evil within me. I try so hard, but it seems like it will never get better for me.
Please know that you are not alone. God is with you. He loves you. You are worth so much to him that he sent his Son, Jesus, to live and die here on earth to make a way for you to be free from your suffering. Just ask him to help you and he will reveal himself to you. You can know a peace which is far greater than what we can ever begin to understand.
I felt the same! I recommend the channel Nargis Alegria, she posts her calls about nonduality m with 1-1 clients and I’ve learnt a lot of practical tips on how to see through suffering :)
I started my journey into non-duality after reading A Course in Miracles. I bring it up because the idea of something being intrinsically wrong/evil is specifically explained in that book. IF we separated from oneness-that means we killed oneness-because now there is no longer just one. We feel guilty because we THINK we separated from God/oneness. We did not. The separation never happened. We are not guilty. We do not leave this world illusion by death, but by truth.
Heya Peachbelleable, I just came across your comment from over a year ago... How are you doing now? If you are still having a rough time and/or need someone to talk with, you can message me anytime. One of the most important things in life is our connection to others.
I’ve actually had some interesting experiences. I was looking in the mirror not long ago, with that same question in my mind, but I actually got to a point when standing there, that it felt like I separated from my body. But i had kind of an intense weightless feeling, and i pulled back out of fear i guess. But theres times where i get that now, only i expect it now , so i can push past it.
Enquiry by definition is a mental process, but not necessary. He says "meditation doesn't always work" People are using the wrong method, and self-Enquiry (around since the time of Nargajuna 150-250), was/is not regarded as a complete method. May advice.: try all methods you can gain access to and stick to those that work. Sat-Chit-Ananda is available for all.
Links to Angelo's book, a full transcript, podcast, and other episodes in our Awakening series: zdoggmd.com/self-inquiry
00:00 Intro
00:37 Meditation Vs. inquiry, what’s the purpose of inquiry
05:10 Who are you?
08:41 Hitting the fear barrier, the doubt barrier, the thought trap
16:50 Inquiry and the identity shift of awakening, dissolution of ego
19:53 Resistance & shadow
24:27 Obstructing beliefs/thoughts common to the process
27:35 Self-inquiry vs. surrendered inquiry into the nature of reality post awakening, non-duality
32:10 Surrendering to unfiltered, self-less reality
36:12 Why the smartest people have the most trouble with this
38:20 Investigating the imagined self, the science of no-self
41:39 Can the experience of unfiltered reality be destabilizing , the goal of liberation
just so you know, its technically imossible to ""wake up"" if you are doing it alone, nobody can judge self proper, when you dont know the "keys" to judge it.
And you cant get it for free, cant get it without unimaginably hard work, and you also cant buy it.
Simple as that.
And almost every kind of meditation ive ever seen is mostly shallow understanding how it works, all of them need "mantras" when you think about it how meditation works, they just NEVER tell you about it, and nobody says the good mantas... instead everyone chooses their own mantra, which is bad.
for third point, the way non-duality is being taught to people is wrong, its all in the ancient books, vedas, they say we can be in state of non duality only half of the "all time", and its NOT the final understanding how universe works, like those fanatics usualy think its absolute truth already..
Everything they say about "no-self" is stupid because souls cant stop to exist individually, its all in the ancient teachings, available to read by anyone who wants,
its called "brahma realization level" that nonduality thing and no-self, and its not finished realization... after state of nonduality comes, everyone will reincarnate anyway.
again, people are not looking for truth, everyone only learns what they WANT..
People are silly, and inherently ignorant.
and what the hell even is that he thinks "" I am the smartest person i know, not them"" :D
he does not know his place in line,
and does not understand what ""liberation"" even is, because the most advanced souls dont want liberation at all,
but people dont even read the source books for all of that knowledge, they only read what they want, in parts, being kinda fanatic often, nobody reads the summary of Vedas.
read about water fluoridation, almost all of you americans have literally dead brain, dead pineal gland responsible for understanding the reality, intuition and all kinds of things, "the third eye", its just not possible for you to be "spiritual", all you have is your shallow understanding
bonus look at Dr. Strangelove (4/8) Movie CLIP - Water and Commies (1964) HD
As Angelo was talking about the fear barrier, I slammed right into it. When I focused on the sensations, they seemed to intensify, and I backed off. Now I'm determined to know what's beyond that. This work you guys are doing is life changing, truly.
One foot in one world, the other in another: the very best way to describe continuing to live life after that initial awakening process.
"What am I supposed to do now?"
Chop wood, carry water. 💕
There are times when as soon as i begin to concentrate and reach at state of absorbtion in my meditation a rush of fear shows itself and im instantly seated back in the mind
Excellent pointers regarding fear and boredom at 10'. Those are the places where I am prone to distract.
Wow! How this ended up on my newsfeed is a mystery. I’m thrilled that it did! Wowowowowowow! ❤
Hey ZDoggMD. This is my first time listening to Dr. DiLullo talk on your channel. In my experience the process of self-enquiry historically has been outlined in classic Advaita (Non-dual) Vedanta (Experience/Knowledge) that's typically associated with Hinduism. I've been a Vedanta student for 15 years and have had every experience that Dr. Di has described, and then some. Recently, one of my teachers stated that, "Most people spend so much time in meditation and studying philosophy in order to empty the vast contents from the cup of the ego/mind/body. While these are definitely worthy pursuits, the goal of Vedanta is to realize/experience that you aren't the cup, then only pure conscious awareness permanently remains." This analogy helped me a lot. Thanks for bringing a western view and face to these universal ancient pursuits.
Murica is getting enlightened y’all
"have had every experience that Dr. Di has described, and then some." lol
Zag steered people way off in 2021
@@StevenGraceEsqhopefully . Its what we need .
@@chitraisenlightenedyeah lol spiritual ego talk 😅
At 18:05 I melted into the idea that I am not interacting with anything, I am just it, the thing. I had to pause the video and just sit here for a minute. Thank you.
Oh what nonsense 😒
Yes, thank you
So, I keep my phone in my pocket to listen to stuff... and for some odd reason, it KEEPS COMING BACK TO THIS!!
This morning... the trees shimmered.
That is a gem of a comment. Thanks for sharing!!❤
Wait, wait! This is too much! Totally feel your mental exhaustion Z! That's the way I feel many times after listening to Angelo's talks... Fascinating conversation as always... I'm re-reading Angelo's book and working on one chapter at a time, highlighting and making notes... taking "baby steps" seem to work better for me... 🙏❤
Im not my bones
Im not my skinn,
Im the ghost whithin.
Im not my thought
Im not my deed,
Im not the I they feed. ❤
Lesson number one:
Nothing I see means anything
Lesson number two:
I have given everything I see, all the meaning it holds for me.
What a helpful breakdown for my ACIM lessons. Particularly the dripping of the stories about a table.
Thank you!
Side note, I’m aware the table was an example/illustration of applying the mental practice of inquiry. It’s not about the table/cup/body etc. but the one observing and projecting it.
Super Awesome !!🙃
I love it when these two get together. The mind is a prison and I want out. Love the guidance.
The mind is made into a prison. Ask what made your mind a prison. Then, there is no need for an escape.
It's the mind that is saying that.
I think this is one of the best talks on meditation I have ever listened to and I have listened to many. ❤Thank you.
Absolutly necessary to do inquiry but its important to have a preparation with meditation to inquire into the unknown
One cannot keep looking, looking, looking because finally one has to give in to one Self and that can only by having faith (or not) and see where it all ends. Keep looking is an ego act.
Intelligent people have this (nasty) tendency to overestimate logic and will finally arrive at a point where they lose themselves in their automatic, intuitive side. And this takes normally more than one life. No one is a "beginner" because we all have our place in the fabric of our reality which is a child of the Truth. As an individuated entity it will never be able to encompass Truth because it is creating Reality in it. Thanks for the video! Happy Hologram
I started doing this inquiry (and forgive me if this is already described elsewhere) and it has really opened up some great space for me. Usually when I’m at work, I’ll go walk to grab some coffee or water and the hallway is ping and is typically empty (I work nights) and as I’m walking I ask myself “who is walking? Or How am I walking “
It was a very opening revelation when I saw that I could walk somewhere and actively think “stop walking or hop on one foot” and my body just continued walking. It helped me realize that there’s no actual thinker and doer and that “I” exist somewhere past those thoughts.
Anyways. I’d love to hear anyone’s feedback on that.
ZDogg and Angelo thank you for all your videos 😊🤘
That's pretty good, I'll have to try that
As a curious creature, I've always pushed myself question everything, myself especially (thanks cPTSD). The growth and healing has been beautifully painful & awe-inspiring
Thank you for these talks.
Zen you did it
This is enough teachings for the separate self 🙏🙏🙏🙏
Angelo’s book is great. He is a great teacher and has his own style of trying to explain self Realization in a fantastic way. The Ancient Sages and Masters are all watching him as he spreads it out among all those who are ready to hear his message.
DIVINE TIMING
DIVINE TIGHT ACTION
Blessings Angelo 🙏🏻.
Keep up the good work. I share your videos whenever I have the opportunity.
But... But... You make it sound as if the ancient sages and masters are all separate egos watching us all here learn what they know. Aren't we already one with them/him/her/it?
@@Butterfly-truth Yes you're right for pointing that out. One with everything
These videos you made with Angelo are sooo potent, Dr. Z! They make me tear up... Found my way here thru Reddit... Thank you so much for arranging all the conditions so this could happen and all of us can benefit from this great work! ❤❤❤
🙏
i am. we are. big love!
Most illuminating CME ever
Special dating for you only 18 years over➺ sexy-nudegirls.host
Anna is a beautiful girl.
He's the person I love, he's my light
day. The way the music flows and sounds
is extravagant and fun. Anna is
icon, legend, beautiful girl, princess, inspiration,
a star. I could go on and on, understand this.
I love NBA Anna.#垃圾
I love the question ‘what does it feel like to be me right now?’… I often ask my friends to ask me that and set a timer for 3 minutes… Once I’ve recognised and named sensation, thoughts and emotion, I find the ‘just this’… unnamable, empty, gently joyful. Time stops and when I come back, what is in front of me feels surprising and looks fresh and different.
I have been watching Angelo’s videos….usually more than once, because I can never grasp anything the first time I find 🙄….I also like this venue with Dr Z. Thanks for the videos, both of you. I struggle due to a lifelong severe SPD…skeptical personality disorder😂🤣. . Not cynical, just skeptical, yet curious as hell…what a dichotomy. I am still open to it all. Never say never has always been my motto. So let’s dive in. 😊
Yes! I suffer from the same condition! 😂
You
@@ZDoggMD Love all your information, thank you. With identity, not to ask a rude question, but what is your nationality, American?
@@sylvialupehernandez9154 I googled it for you. His nationality is American, born in New Jersey.
Arw you familiar with Dr Joe Dispenza , Dr Bruce Lipton ?? I'd suggest looking at their videos . Lewis Howes does great interviews with them 💪😎🙏
Wow, you are describing what I am going through! Thank you both for sharing your thoughts!
I spent 3 days all 24 hrs looking for answer to” who are you?” At an Ashram seriously 😳 hardest thing l had ever done. Not having a label any more is amazing than anything else I have ever experienced. Watching and listening to you both talking about what is very different and difficult trying to navigate. I have never talked really about my experience as it’s beyond expectations.
I never knew until my late forties that I can just ask myself this question and truly the answers came back for me in the astral. I was wide awake remembered everything. I learned why I’m here and who I really am. So yea it works! My world has taken a completely different path as a result. I also meditate but the astral or just before sleeping self review of my day and asking questions to God before sleep is the most powerful technique I’ve found outside of meditation.
Omg the part Angelo say there's no label about distance or the table is so mind blowing hah. Angelo is a great direct teacher. Great video, love it 🍃💥
Self-Inquiry was developed by Nargajuna, (150-250), and used extensively in most Buddhist Schools. It's a valuable approach but is a preparatory technique. My advice: investigate all available methods for tapping into and merging with The Self (Ramana Maharshi's term). Complementary to Self-Inquiry would be silent meditation and also accessing "Mahamritunjaya mantra - Sacred Sounds Choir" and listening to it for 5 min per day for at least two weeks. Enjoy the Pure Silence of the Absolute, Sat-Chit-Ananda..
Holy smoke balls no awakening gurus have ever put the right words to describe my experience as y'all. 2 weeks ago I did mindfulness meditation and body-scan for about 8 hours. That night I went clubbing with my friend and I could barely talk to anyone cos thoughts were not entering my head. Ever since I have way less desire to do the things I usually do. I feel physically and mentally light and I basically just want to walk around giggling all day. Thanks Zdogg and Angelo
So...You watch clowns on TH-cam...You go out clubbing...You walk around giggling...Nobody of depth n substance is taking you seriously...Try again.
I find a lot of my fears are related to physical survival of self and family that is completely reasonable on it's surface that I suddely sense I need to let go while listening to this.
This is just won’t my soul needed to hear. You just reminded me what I know I knew
It’s frustrating how close they are. A refusal to integrate this lovely information with solid psychological introspection prevents them from getting to this deeper truth:
We CAN find resistance. We resist pain. When we resist pain, we create suffering. Pain (physical and emotional) is an inevitable by-product of engagement in the world.
Suffering is what occurs when we attempt to avoid that pain.
The shadow is a psychic repository of our patterned/habitual resistance to pain. So, “shadow work” is reconnecting with the old pain while also letting go of the old resistance patterns.
That non-dual space mentioned is a clean field from which we can move into introspection from spaciousness, rather than fear-based contraction.
We can’t live in the contentless space of the non-dual forever. We use that space to create what we actually want.
Angelo talks about this a lot actually. I think the main idea here is to get people started though. This isn't a video on Liberation. ❤
Thanks for this fab interview. Yes, that fear response to a relaxed empty body. I literally fall to the ground, spinning, feel cross eyed. Only happens after meditation tho and is short lived.
Thanks for both of your soft voices too. Xx
I’ve experienced something like this “flow state” and the dissolving of consciousness (“I am all the things all the time,”) but I sort of struggle with the question of “why is this important?” And “why bother?”
Even if my ego were to dissolve and my consciousness were to merge with the full consciousness of reality, I still need to get up and go to work at 8am tomorrow morning. My kids still need taken care of until they’re older. Ironically, the lack of distraction can be a distraction from the people and things around us.
Because "Ego Death" and "consciousness of reality" (or "universal consciousness" if you like) is at best a misrepresentation, at worst, a misunderstanding.
"Ego death" is not the destination, it is a footprint on our path of growth as we get better at understanding our continually evolving place in existence and how to navigate this particular path.
"Consciousness of reality", or "universal consciousness " is understanding from a state of perceptual overload. ...again, not a destination.
As to your question of "Why is it important?" ...that is more difficult to explain. Have you seen a person break down in tears of overwhelming joy? Maybe they could not hear, but, because of medical advancements can, for the first time in their lives, hear their young child call their name.
Prior to that, how would you accurately describe all that goes along with that experience? How would you describe that that experience is not the destination, but a stepping stone to the utilization of that tool to achieve much greater things that cannot even be fathomed without that tool?
"Why is it important?" ...because, used properly, that tool, along with others, can help make your existence unimaginably better.
Who you are is not just "boundless" horizontally, it's also boundless vertically.
What I mean by that is that the essence of awareness (who we are) being recognized and even stabilized is not enough for "permanent liberation."
Karma (the karmic process) is very real and very subtle. We cannot be fully free of the ego until we exhaust our karma - which are trace tendencies left within the mind from past ego-based actions.
We can awaken in this life and awakening can be a pleasant state but states are not permanent. In death all states get exposed and reduced and if karmas have not been "resolved" they will cause the mind to again identify as an ego and so an embodiment.. aka "rebirth."
It's nothing in THIS life that we should be fearful of, but after death we will not be fully in control of our consciousness unless the traces of karmic influences have been totally cleared away.
The way this is done is through action, specifically SELFLESS action. In the Indian traditions this is called "karma yoga" and it is just as necessary as "self inquiry" and even as "awakening" itself.
If true liberation is what you seek then do not stop at mere inquiry or awakening, you must also deal with the residual effects left from your non awakening. Start living as an awakened being today, this moment.
Love the pointing and humor!
Fantastic, I’ve listened to this twice now. The first time my thoughts kept commenting and I missed half of the conversation. Currently reading the chapter on inquiry, so very relevant.
Stay here now eternally
Oh!
This is great!❤
This video deserves a lot more than 43k views. Thank you to Dr. Dilullo. I've purchased his book!
Please get together for another series you two!
I love you Dr. Angelo 👏 😄
How many times I've stood infront of that door... And yet here I am. One foot inside one foot outside. But weirdly there's these strong winds that are kinda making it hard to keep the balance lol.
The more inflated the ego, the more wind you catch I suppose 😁
Love you both❤️
Be still, and know that you are God. Pure infinite consciousness. All that is, has been, and ever will be. Non-duality. We are one.
Everybody is Pure Consciousness, with "superimpositions" of various projections of reality into a composite, that is ultimately Consciousness. Obviously, the so-called "lower" notion of the self continues on it's own level. (but this lower level is simply a projection of Consciousness within Itself).
I so resonate with all of this...Thank you
Winhof message sure get you in the meditation
Thanks!
🙏🙏🙏❤️❤️❤️
Thank you !
Excellent! I have seen many videos on non-duality. This is the best.
I think of animals, humans being in that classification as a "collection" of consciousness held together by the same forces that shape planets and for lack of a better word "control" the direction they move in and the shape that movement makes.
We as humans along with other animals and living creatures are an expression and collection of this consciousness and while in this "collection" (confined inside a body) we have a unique perspective of the world and can collect information from our vantage point, our own perspective. No two living creatures, animals -including humans share the same exact experiences nor thoughts. By consciousness separating itself into "collection" or "bundles" (us) we get to experience a unique life and collect information that one cannot by themselves.
It is as though the universe is exploring itself and learning through us even though we don't truly exist on our own an illusion of individuality persists while we are "alive" inhabit this body/ in this bundle of consciousness.
We are but a part of something much larger but it is very hard to see that while in this body.
Analogy time. Consciousness is like the ocean and a body like an empty glass once the glass is filled with some ocean water then the glass has a small amount of ocean water and fills the glass taking the shape of the glass taking on it's characteristics. The ocean water has not become the glass the ocean has mearly conformed to the vessel for a time.
Once the glass has broken and the water goes back into the ocean it is once again part of the whole. Like with us once we die our consciousness goes back into the vast consciousness as a whole.
So yes we are all the same consciousness but have different perspectives and experiences that we gleam while alive. When our bodies die that knowledge/experience will be flow back into the ocean of consciousness.
Such amazing insight. I have flashes of Heaven when I listen to Dr. Dilullo. ZDoggMD enhances the rush of excitement. I was depressed before I listened and now I feel nice. I need to listen to this at least 10 more times because it is so new.
Amazing comment I agree. Almost everyone I know thinks this is crazy, but
I think it might be the most important thing in this existence we have arrived in.
Keep it coming! These are the INCREDIBLE! Somehow it can feel like the algorithm is its own built in form of a resistance barrier to access the deep stuff, but man this is so good
Flashback to 10th grade: "Just who do you think you are!?!?!"
Me: "Whoa teach. That's some heavy philosophy to lay on me this early in the morning!"
😂
Fan F-----g tastic; Absolute best non-dual convo EVER. Angelo I bought your book today and it cant arrive soon enough. I love your urgency/focus, thank you guys!
Please redo this show but through the lens of adolescence. I would love to here how we can help teens develop this awareness before they are filled with ego.
THIS!!!
It is better to develop a healthy ego first.
Self develops significantly earlier than ego, and I don't think there is a way to take control to prevent that from happening in people.
You cannot safe people from their suffering, most you can do is look closer and closer at your own suffering, that'll extrapolate out and benefit everyone that comes into contact with you, including teens.
How can you float to the surface before diving deep into ego? Wouldn't you just get stuck being an ego-less infant if you never know the suffering of being a seperate self? Why not just skip over the human experience altogether? Wouldn't the ideal solution be to never be born in the first place?
Is this an exercise in acceptance? Reading your book, listening to your meditations and trying to release the resistance and be open to what comes.
The mind becoming calm comes with meditation, if you do this consistently and the correct way, it will take you to other realms, open you mind to new understanding of life and things; also empties your mind of beliefs, relieves you from beliefs and indoctrination.
great video lots of good topics and that ending was priceless
I LOVE YOU GUYS!!!
Don't you just love it when the mind clicks and have insights. When you sit back and smile while they talk because you come home step by step to the truth that the minds can't even understand xD
You guys are crazy! I love it! ❤
Incredible. For me, one of the best - if not the best - nonduality teachers out there. Very clear and relatable. Thank you so much.
I think there are a lot of deeply realized teachers now. The Internet and perhaps the way suffering goes in this world now has really spread this option of the realization pathless path.
I think different paintings have there different places. Angelo definitely points more in a Zen type of way. But other ways of pointing can be useful for other people, cause our conditioning is quite unique, even when we're all sharing the same essence/nature. For me Angelo has had the clearest pointing aswell though
Beautiful ❤️
I were taught that meditation is ‘focus without opinion’. That would I think automatically take the Ego out of the equation, as opinion comes from the Ego. His statement that Ego loves meditation makes no sense.
I love you guys. Thank you.
I once read in 'A Course For Miracles' the ego only knows two states: It vascilates between being vicious and suspicious - but that doesn't seem to be a very happy way to exist imo. I have been exploring methods of self inquiry since childhood. My experience taught me 'ego complex' is a difficult, slippery, and often exhausting thing to master without diving deep into the emotional/spiritual parts of iurselves. I have noticed over the years, 'happy' isn't always where we learn the most valuable lessons for our personal growth. Counter intuitive as it seems, it's usually when I surrender to my higher conscious self where I may have to go through deep suffering (sometimes), but if I am willing to listen and to learn, the knowledge & confidence I gain is worth its weight in gold! -my 2¢😊
I absolutely enjoy the videos you guys make together! Loved the Roscoe P Coletrain imitations! 🤣😂🤣
Loved this episode so much ❤️
I think the distinction that's being lost about meditation is "for what purpose?" That's something usually isn't stated. People hear "meditation" and think "altered state" or "higher plane of consciousness." It's some concept. They might associate it with "Transcendental" which doesn't describe anything concrete.
To me, it's guided mindfulness meditation, and the purpose is to reach a level of stillness that thoughts _can_ be detected/discerned as they enter your mind (and then a veto power exercised). The benefit is gaining experience with the difference between myself and myself thinking. Not knowing that difference, not being familiar with thoughts entering my mind (and what it's like to have no thought), then thoughts cascade from one to many, and a loud rumination of dire importance, affecting me without me realizing it, or how it started.
It is transcendental, but I'm transcending myself. Most people don't think in those terms when they hear "meditation." I feel like the meditation is the least of it. It's the "playing catch" with your subconcious from whence thoughts emerge. Developing that skill/recognition, and the ability to choose not to think about something right now (not that the thought is bad, or should be resisted. Just "not now."). The meditative part of it just helps get that practice going. After it's done for a while, and a person has gained familiarity with those brief (1/2 second) periods between thoughts, they can be more aware as they're doing anything (without meditation). The periods become longer (the veto power is more proficient. I like to think of it as the "agent self" of psychology is more awake and being responsible instead of snoozing in the back seat while the false self confabulates without the adult in the room.).
To me, the goal is to be aware of thoughts as they emerge. And, meditation is just the first step to developing that awareness. Training wheels. It's not the meditation that is useful. It's the being familiar with thoughts entering the mind, and what it's like without them. I am not my thoughts (and they can takeover if I don't have this awareness of them).
I believe theres an important distinction about meditation to make as to the concept of self inquiry theres active meditation choiceless awareness where questions about oneself might arise.then theres passive meditation where the concept is for the quieting or no mind
I’m the observer of all things.
You are also the all -things being observed. Not separate.
I can feel that freakin bubble bubbling up as Angelo speaks dude. This is fn spaceballs!
Brilliant conversation and pointing. Xxx
Love this content! Please, keep it going.
great podcast and interviewer!
Amazing video! thank you for this content, its lovely how clear and direct the pointers are. I just enjoy such brutal honesty.
Very potent conversation ! This is the very first time I met Dr. Angelo . The "funny" thing is that while listening to Dr Angelo at the same time I was enjoying some relaxation from my ego, I was trying to fit in his thought to some philosophy I know, instead of just letting it go ... and enjoy .. I guess is - in my case - the last strategy of the ego, that is, to label, to put in some shelf ...because the ego felt threathned to disolve itself into an experience of nonduality .... Does it make sense to anyone ? Thanks a lot for the video !!
Inquiry is OK but it's a mental process. Transcend mental processes altogether by using the foremost Shiva mantra (in the Rig Veda). No problem. Access"Mahamritunjaya mantra - Sacred Sounds Choir" , and listen to it for 5 min per day for at least 2 weeks. You'll eventually merge into Pure Consciousness, Sat-Chit-Ananda.
@8:44: Oh yeah, "Inquiry" can definitely trigger a nasty "panic attack" difficult to navigate if you're not under the auspices of a Master who's already "pushed-through." Years ago in my 30's I did a rather dangerous two-week experiment in "mindfulness" whilst going about my normal daily routine, partly inspired by Eckhart Tolle's "The Power of Now." While totally immersed in the world, working and interacting with others (ugh), I secretly began a regimen of mentally asking "Who's thinking this thought? Who's feeling this feeling?" every time I had a thought or caught myself in a "mind-play." If the mind wanted to think, I would strong-arm it every moment I could into looping-back on-itself, using it's energy against itself with varying forms of the "Question:" Who's aware of this thought? This effectively short-circuited things into an increasingly uneasy silence...
Over the days this intensely-focused activity of interrupting almost every thought, every day-dream with the "Question" caused my monkey-mind to slow. Like a flea-bitten chimp in a tree, moodily scratching it's ass, picking it's nose and barring it's teeth at me, my mind reluctantly stilled. But this was in an unpleasantly smouldering, radioactive sort-of-way. (When I was a little kid I remembered thinking and processing information in a sort of "mental short-hand" rich in metaphorical imagery that was information-dense but hard to translate into words, only later as an adult to degrade into the plodding tele-type _verbalized_ thought we all engage in. I began to revert back to that earlier form of mental processing as the days wore on, and when I did have a verbalized thought, it felt distressingly _close,_ like a voice in my ear, almost disassociated, very loud. Mental images also tended to become crisper as well).
Otherwise I was able to halt almost all mental-chatter - masturbation also ceased - (for the "Question" interfered: who was jacking?) as I felt my mind beginning to twist and buckle under this hard-core fight for alertness, to stay afloat and not subsume into the unconscious rivers of thought, _at all costs._
It didn't work out well.
Finally one evening after about ten days of this, I was retiring to bed feeling very weird, unearthly and on the edge of something I couldn't articulate. My brain felt starved for input. I turned off my light, closed my eyes and waited for sleep to take me.
Flashing lights like fireworks began to cascade in my mind's eye, energy began to surge through my nerves and I became aware of a very tiny but ferocious spark of un-dying, un-sleeping awareness, burning deep in the meat of my brain...that I _could not shut-off._ I could not escape into blissful regenerative sleep with that freaky light, burning-away in the middle of my awareness. I have to work for a living. Can't work without sleep!
This all quickly escalated into what felt like a bad acid trip, as more energy began to surge through me and felt my mind wanting to tear free from it's moorings. I realized I was like a computer laptop trying to reboot while plugged into a 600 volt mains. There was no guarantee that I'd "reboot whole" -I realized I went about things all wrong without having prepared a proper solid foundation...I did not want to reconstitute as a mad paramahamsa. I have to work and maintain my existence. I did not want to get committed to a psyche ward.
I flew out of bed and crouched into a grounding mudra, shaking like an old dog and praying to become a monkey's uncle. I fought with all my might and refused surrender into what I feared was madness. Eventually the phenomena wound-down, but I was quits with any sort of meditation/inquiry practice for a long time after that.
So I'm kinda leery now. I'd risk it again, but it'd have to be in the right context; I'd have to be baby-sat by someone who's already gone through it and not having to worry about working for a living. I doubt I can afford to spend the next few years as a blissed-out pile of goo sitting on a park bench, watching the world roll-by into oblivion.
No one knows and most people only imagine traits that don't actually have.
Nothing you are is unique to you, you are habits ideas politics and beliefs an algorithm of information you recieved due to exposure to others.
Great talk 👍
I am loving the introduction of all this material on this platform!!!! It’s so fascinating to hear various experiences and pathways to awakening!
I have found the Nature of Personal Reality (Jane Robert’s - Seth material) very enlightening and beautiful in terms of illuminating obvious fatal flaws in our approach to health and medicine!!!!
Omg does this resonate w me right now
I bought the book and honestly loved the concept at first, and it made so much sense, but now... the "fear response" just sounds like a panic attack (of which I'm familiar with), and if it is a panic attack the professional advice is typically to just sit with it, so now I'm wondering if this is all just an elaborate construction to deal with an anxiety disorder and the fear of death/ oblivion. 🤷♀️
Thank you so much ZDoggMD for bringing Dr. DiLullo to our attention, I was also hugely influenced by "The Power Of Now" and had a big shift in my understanding of who I am and what is reality but did not seem to find the practical tools to make the shift from knowing it's there intellectually to actually be able to go "to the other side". Dr. DiLullo seems to be the missing link when he provide practical tools and feedbacks that can help people make the shift, and your conversations are great since you convey exactly what someone who is on the path but yet did not had the real shift would think and want to know.
I have a question to him, that maybe will resonate sometimes in your future conversations. When Dr. DiLullo say that the street and you are the same, and say "what a thought is, versus what you actually experiencing with your senses".
There is something that I have a problem understanding, since if I have a pain in my leg, would the street feel it? if someone knock on my door, I can hear it with my ears but would I feel it as if the hand is knocking on me? The fact that we do have senses which are bound to our specific body and bring only the information that our limited body can be in contact with, how does it goes together with a boundless feeling of reality that is not limited to any place or anything?
Maybe he already answered it and maybe this is not the right question to ask, but I find that this is something that lingers in my mind when ever I try to understand the nature of awakening(and off course it is a thought:) Thanks!
THIs host is the best I have listened to. He’s truly trying to explain the big secret.
Geez
ILL SAY wHAT NO ONe ELSE will
After 900 shows figuring out the what the words that say nothing mean!!
And from the host NOT the guest. I am unsure he wants anyone else to wake up. There has got to be a better way to explain this without TELLiNG the rest of us!! Good lord speak english please. 🙏
I have listened to a few of your videos with Angelo and whenever he talks about waking up I’m just like 😵💫 I feel like I’m too dumb for this. I can meditate and let go for a while, but eventually I go back to suffering. Like feels so difficult and unfulfilling 99.9% of the time and it feels like a lot work. I have to fight the thought that dying would be easier on a daily basis. I feel so alone, unlovable, and worthless. It feels like there is something intrinsically wrong/evil within me. I try so hard, but it seems like it will never get better for me.
How does he know all of this as a person?
Please know that you are not alone. God is with you. He loves you. You are worth so much to him that he sent his Son, Jesus, to live and die here on earth to make a way for you to be free from your suffering. Just ask him to help you and he will reveal himself to you. You can know a peace which is far greater than what we can ever begin to understand.
I felt the same! I recommend the channel Nargis Alegria, she posts her calls about nonduality m with 1-1 clients and I’ve learnt a lot of practical tips on how to see through suffering :)
I started my journey into non-duality after reading A Course in Miracles. I bring it up because the idea of something being intrinsically wrong/evil is specifically explained in that book. IF we separated from oneness-that means we killed oneness-because now there is no longer just one. We feel guilty because we THINK we separated from God/oneness. We did not. The separation never happened. We are not guilty. We do not leave this world illusion by death, but by truth.
Heya Peachbelleable, I just came across your comment from over a year ago...
How are you doing now? If you are still having a rough time and/or need someone to talk with, you can message me anytime.
One of the most important things in life is our connection to others.
Trying to define "myself" imposes a boundary on what's left over (everything else) which cannot be bound... Boundaries are arbitrary...
I’ve actually had some interesting experiences. I was looking in the mirror not long ago, with that same question in my mind, but I actually got to a point when standing there, that it felt like I separated from my body. But i had kind of an intense weightless feeling, and i pulled back out of fear i guess. But theres times where i get that now, only i expect it now , so i can push past it.
"Who am I" is not to be pondered or paid attention to since it leads to attachment to self-view. said by the Buddha
if we could just see ourselves the way others precieve us, life would be more simple
David,
No one sees but a small slice of our time. We are the only one with ourself all the time
There's an awful lot of others. Wouldn't their opinions of us just throw confusion at us?
It’s when you go to parallel lives during meditation, that’s when the ego dies.
Enquiry by definition is a mental process, but not necessary. He says "meditation doesn't always work" People are using the wrong method, and self-Enquiry (around since the time of Nargajuna 150-250), was/is not regarded as a complete method. May advice.: try all methods you can gain access to and stick to those that work. Sat-Chit-Ananda is available for all.