I am 14 and has been struggling with perfectionism for half a year. It’s often so torturing but I learn a lot about myself and really start due with the perfectionist tendency in me. People always use ‘perfectionist’ as a joke but they don’t really get it. Anyway, I hope I can grow through this journey. I know it’s part of God’s plan of training and molding me so I can be used by him.
Mark, this teaching is not only timely but desperately needed in the Body of Christ. Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! May God give you wisdom, insight, knowledge and understanding as you look to him and help others! Keep up your excellent work! ❤
I had been struggling with perfectionism so much. I never let myself trust God's full love. I was fasting from waking for 5-8 hours and reading the bible without breaks for that whole time. I prayed for 30 people a day... Because I'm slightly on the spectrum, after listing to really good teaching that was mainly directed at lazy and baby Christians I took it the wrong way and felt condemned. This lead to a trip to the hospital as a stayed up for 3 days without almost any sleep. I have a diagnosis but I think the root problem is exactly what this video talks about. Now God has gotten me to a place where I feel complete peace knowing God isn't just an idea but a person and The Person who loves me infinitely. My Abba. Run to Jesus he calls us to be perfect but it might not be our extreme definition that rejects the proccess.
I do sabatoge...emotions are scary. I think anger is scary and I always try to immediatly remove it or fix it. Like how dare you ever be angry. Needed this message. I always need more equipping. Thank you for this message. Always a blessing
Watching this and I'm like so how do I fix this? Yeah. I hate being so trapped in perfectionism. I go to extremes and often through the baby out with the bath water. I chronically over think. Ugh. Trying to break free from what I call beauty bondage. That perfectionist critical voice seems to always be with me and yes I thought it was God! It says people won't love you unless you're beautiful / perfect. IF I could just see the core of my problem I could work on it. I will just rest or try to rest hoping God knows I try. Receiving love is so darn difficult!
Thank you for this video! When I had my husband listen to this, he said that every point made was me. He recieved a greater understanding of why I act the way I do, say the things I say and have a hard time being vulnerable and expressing emotions, unless negative. It's really nice to feel understood by my husband and to feel a greater sense of what is going on with me from and outside perspective and what I can do to try and work on myself, my family & friends relationships and my relationship with God.
Oh, I like that, "you can't just be yourself, I need you to be(fill in blank)"... sorry friend, this is the new, emerging(real) me. The one God made and intends to work through, not that other guy. These are all so true, very helpful
I started following your a while ago and I wasn’t in place that I could even be honest that this is me. Now I can at least start to be honest- this is me. Thank you for your honesty and for letting us know that we are not alone and that God loves us. May we all come to know this.
This showed up on my feed and I won’t lie, I was skeptical. But, the Lord always knows exactly what I need and I’m so glad I watched! I moved into a city four years ago, and I’ve grown so much harder in my heart, but the Lord has been working in me slowly to help me accept my feelings and let them flow, as you said. It’s hard and I joke around about it, but it’s been worth it! Thank you and Lord bless you in all your work, Mark!
You are so on point with this. Part of it is ripping my heart apart because I have not allowed these type of emotions in my perfectionism. KEEP MAKING THESE!
Thank You for showing your vulnerability. You only have this wisdom because you seen all this in yourself and did the work. You are doing Gods will that’s for sure.
I bought your book "God loves me and I love Myself" when it first came out. I still haven't been able to read it through. So I started with " The Heart Healing Journey" became a partner, signed up for the course, had to stop, purchased "I Will Not Fear" Wow this is what I needed to address! This is where I had to learn humility, gratitude, overcome legalism, performance based living, etc. learn the God grid. Just started " Exposing the Rejection Mindset" Wow what a journey 3 maybe 4 years now on this journey and now I can receive these teaching on perfectionism without shame, guilt, condemnation, codependency! Thank you! I don't think you even realize the impact you have had on people's lives. I am eternally grateful for you brother. I am learning as well as my family, we are learning how to have relationships. With God, each other and our world. Did not know how to do that until we met you. Thank you for sharing this marvelous gift you have! ❤️ God bless you and Melissa!
Thank you there are too many sanctimonious preachers out there right now, I mean I get it from a “repent NOW” perspective but after that i feel it misses the whole point of what it means to be an imperfect being, a sinner and why we need Jesus it caused me to be rapped up in perfectionism.
I love this! Thank you soo much! 👐🏼🙏🏼 God Bless you sir for your videos & how you help ppl in their struggles for self validation & when we feel tge God is punishing us or doesn't love us because we don't add up . Or we ourselves hold ourselves to such a standard that we can't achieve his grace , mercy & love... performance based Christianity is somethong i've always struggled with til this day. ( although deep down i know better ) i somehow always fall victim to that old condemnational mentality & it sucks. That's why i'm soo thankful fpr your videos. God Bless
You always speak to Me. Right on point. & Congrats! I've been praying for your subscribers to go up & it did bc more Ppl need to hear this personality/ spiritually/ emotionally& mental wise.
I had this before I was saved. Then, it became for religious perfection on top of the old thought patterns I had. Then thoughts came to mind you think you've changed. The old you would do this, not the new you. It would be a back and forth of taking the old self down off the cross and putting the new me back up there. Constant taking off and putting back on.
I am grateful to have found your resources. I am just realizing some of these truths in myself and learning to be patient and accept Gods love. Thank you both!
Thank you!! This was so freeing for me and is really going to help me moving forward. Related to all of those points but couldn’t articulate . Loved this
Hey Mark, thanks very much for your ministry. I started watching your videos recently, and they've been helpful to my healing journey when it comes to perfectionism, anxiety and OCD. I've been realizing there's patterns of perfectionism/OCD in my life and I think healing from them will be very important for me; as I've started applying these principles to my life I've already started to sense more freedom and hope in some really deep-rooted areas I've struggled with for a long time.
Thanks so much, Mark! In my new relationship, my boyfriend has been so straightforward in expressing God's love to me. It triggered my perfectionistic fight-or-flight for sure! I usually get hit with depression and anxiety "out of nowhere" a few months into a relationship. This time, it struck a month in. I think it is because my boyfriend has been so "in my face" with acceptance, and my perfectionistic tendencies have a hard time acknowledging my worth and accepting that kind of love. Thank you for the healing words of encouragement and the gifts you have become equipped with through the power of the Spirit! Keep on keeping on, Mark! :)
20:46 wow this just hit me. In a way I am trying to hold that part together because I do relate by being the one who “does the right thing” been like that ever since I was a child. I sent you an email yesterday but just ignore it 😂this video has helped me stay focus and realize what’s actually going on
Wow. This and you is just wow, so amazing! You don't understand what this has done to me, to my heart and mind. I relate so much to everything you said and i was always doing the figuring out of everything like u said and could never put my finger on what the actual issue was and have just felt lost, and constantly just going back to trying harder then breaking down then getting busy again make sure i do the right thing then surely that will help and i shouldn't feel or think like this etc just keep pushing them emotions fdown, forgive and move on. I feel honestly a bit speechless at how amazing this video/advice was. I would really love to get some counselling from you, please. Thank you so much.
Somehow I needed this video… since I’m going through depression over my past decisions I did. After feeling lost in my school years. Throughout my life, I’ve been a perfectionist. I got it from my dad since long time ago he was focused on the performance of his work and other stuff. Some of the points you’ve mentioned, I can definitely relate! Like not being allowed to express my emotions fully, about the shame taking over, being harsh on myself when I’m not feeling myself, etc. I normally dislike myself being highly sensitive and usually think of trying to fix myself and fix my feelings, not feeling such a mess. You are right, we are broken and we are a mess. It’s learning how to embrace yourself during the midst of the emotional turmoil. I really don’t like being confused of why certain feelings pop out of the blue but this video helped me to understand the root of avoidance. Relating to being vulnerable. It makes me wanna watch this video again, since I struggle with my thoughts and emotions. I am too vulnerable in theses areas and I believe that’s the reason why I get depressed at times along with feeling lost on what exactly to do in my life. Thank you so much for this video, it’s a blessing!
Hey Mark do you mind talking about perfectionism and prayer? It’s so hard to have a healthy view of what prayer is in the midst of perfectionistic mindset. Prayer is just so hard for me.
I have known for a long time that I do self-talk. I didn't know what it was called until treatment back in the 80s. Weakness is the reason I wanted to go to Vietnam at 17. I knew if I went I would be killed or cured. Never been good with emotions because other boys in the first grade called me a "CRY BABY", well couldn't let that happen again. I've done the best I could trying to think my way through life.
I feel so much pressure and stress and very much fear and anxiety.. I don't know hoe to receive God's love it's really hard to endure. I feel abused by myself....how can I find and receive God's love and grace?
By the way, you get on my nerves slapping me upside my head with all the truth you relay. I also hate to word JOURNEY", it tells me that it's not a quick fix. Until I found you I was just going to stop trying because I was not successful at much. I heard you say something like too late disease, that's how i feel now at 67.
I am 14 and has been struggling with perfectionism for half a year. It’s often so torturing but I learn a lot about myself and really start due with the perfectionist tendency in me. People always use ‘perfectionist’ as a joke but they don’t really get it. Anyway, I hope I can grow through this journey. I know it’s part of God’s plan of training and molding me so I can be used by him.
You are loved!
Not just half a year … my WHOLE life!! ;)
Mark, this teaching is not only timely but desperately needed in the Body of Christ. Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! May God give you wisdom, insight, knowledge and understanding as you look to him and help others! Keep up your excellent work! ❤
I had been struggling with perfectionism so much. I never let myself trust God's full love. I was fasting from waking for 5-8 hours and reading the bible without breaks for that whole time. I prayed for 30 people a day... Because I'm slightly on the spectrum, after listing to really good teaching that was mainly directed at lazy and baby Christians I took it the wrong way and felt condemned. This lead to a trip to the hospital as a stayed up for 3 days without almost any sleep. I have a diagnosis but I think the root problem is exactly what this video talks about. Now God has gotten me to a place where I feel complete peace knowing God isn't just an idea but a person and The Person who loves me infinitely. My Abba. Run to Jesus he calls us to be perfect but it might not be our extreme definition that rejects the proccess.
I do sabatoge...emotions are scary. I think anger is scary and I always try to immediatly remove it or fix it. Like how dare you ever be angry. Needed this message. I always need more equipping. Thank you for this message. Always a blessing
I get angry that I get angry and I literally look like a steaming kettle, the audacity of having feelings! Lol
Yes!
I'm a Christian licensed therapist, and I think your channel is excellent! Thanks for helping me understand things better.
It's like your reading our minds my friend! You have found your God given purpose! God Bless
Watching this and I'm like so how do I fix this? Yeah. I hate being so trapped in perfectionism. I go to extremes and often through the baby out with the bath water. I chronically over think. Ugh. Trying to break free from what I call beauty bondage. That perfectionist critical voice seems to always be with me and yes I thought it was God! It says people won't love you unless you're beautiful / perfect. IF I could just see the core of my problem I could work on it. I will just rest or try to rest hoping God knows I try. Receiving love is so darn difficult!
Thank you for this video! When I had my husband listen to this, he said that every point made was me. He recieved a greater understanding of why I act the way I do, say the things I say and have a hard time being vulnerable and expressing emotions, unless negative. It's really nice to feel understood by my husband and to feel a greater sense of what is going on with me from and outside perspective and what I can do to try and work on myself, my family & friends relationships and my relationship with God.
This is amazing!
Oh, I like that, "you can't just be yourself, I need you to be(fill in blank)"... sorry friend, this is the new, emerging(real) me. The one God made and intends to work through, not that other guy. These are all so true, very helpful
I started following your a while ago and I wasn’t in place that I could even be honest that this is me. Now I can at least start to be honest- this is me. Thank you for your honesty and for letting us know that we are not alone and that God loves us. May we all come to know this.
Rules are what keep me safe! I know what's expected! That way, I can always be pleasing and make people happy!! That's what goes through my mind!
This showed up on my feed and I won’t lie, I was skeptical. But, the Lord always knows exactly what I need and I’m so glad I watched! I moved into a city four years ago, and I’ve grown so much harder in my heart, but the Lord has been working in me slowly to help me accept my feelings and let them flow, as you said. It’s hard and I joke around about it, but it’s been worth it!
Thank you and Lord bless you in all your work, Mark!
You are so on point with this. Part of it is ripping my heart apart because I have not allowed these type of emotions in my perfectionism. KEEP MAKING THESE!
Thank You for showing your vulnerability. You only have this wisdom because you seen all this in yourself and did the work. You are doing Gods will that’s for sure.
This was a blessing as always. Congrats on the 20k subs!
Glad to hear. Thanks Bill!
I've read 2 of your books and watched your videos, but still struggling hard. Thank you for your work. ♥
Wow this is me to a T. Please God help me grasp the fullness of what Mark was saying in this video. I needed to hear this
I bought your book "God loves me and I love Myself" when it first came out. I still haven't been able to read it through. So I started with " The Heart Healing Journey" became a partner, signed up for the course, had to stop, purchased "I Will Not Fear" Wow this is what I needed to address! This is where I had to learn humility, gratitude, overcome legalism, performance based living, etc. learn the God grid. Just started " Exposing the Rejection Mindset" Wow what a journey 3 maybe 4 years now on this journey and now I can receive these teaching on perfectionism without shame, guilt, condemnation, codependency! Thank you! I don't think you even realize the impact you have had on people's lives. I am eternally grateful for you brother. I am learning as well as my family, we are learning how to have relationships. With God, each other and our world. Did not know how to do that until we met you. Thank you for sharing this marvelous gift you have! ❤️ God bless you and Melissa!
Thank you for letting your love of God and others to do the things you do! God bless your and your family.
Thank you there are too many sanctimonious preachers out there right now, I mean I get it from a “repent NOW” perspective but after that i feel it misses the whole point of what it means to be an imperfect being, a sinner and why we need Jesus it caused me to be rapped up in perfectionism.
Yeah I need to order that book. The heart healing journey.
I love this! Thank you soo much! 👐🏼🙏🏼
God Bless you sir for your videos & how you help ppl in their struggles for self validation & when we feel tge God is punishing us or doesn't love us because we don't add up . Or we ourselves hold ourselves to such a standard that we can't achieve his grace , mercy & love... performance based Christianity is somethong i've always struggled with til this day. ( although deep down i know better ) i somehow always fall victim to that old condemnational mentality & it sucks. That's why i'm soo thankful fpr your videos.
God Bless
This was a really good video. I think I and my husband, and our children would benefit from listening together. Thank you for making it. ❤️
You always speak to Me. Right on point. & Congrats! I've been praying for your subscribers to go up & it did bc more Ppl need to hear this personality/ spiritually/ emotionally& mental wise.
Yes me too!
you explain things so well.
Yes, and in such a kind, gentle way! Really shows the work of God in his life. :)
I feel so seen. This is incredibly freeing.
Thanks for sharing what you have learned in your journey with the Lord. It's been so helpful in reflecting on my own journey with Him.
So helpful I listened to it twice. Thanks you 🙏
I feel like you are counselling me right now in the same room. I need help so bad as my last act of self will is creeping in my thoughts daily.
I had this before I was saved. Then, it became for religious perfection on top of the old thought patterns I had. Then thoughts came to mind you think you've changed. The old you would do this, not the new you. It would be a back and forth of taking the old self down off the cross and putting the new me back up there. Constant taking off and putting back on.
I am grateful to have found your resources. I am just realizing some of these truths in myself and learning to be patient and accept Gods love. Thank you both!
Thank you!! This was so freeing for me and is really going to help me moving forward. Related to all of those points but couldn’t articulate . Loved this
Thank you so much for your help Mark 🙏 God bless you x
Hey Mark, thanks very much for your ministry. I started watching your videos recently, and they've been helpful to my healing journey when it comes to perfectionism, anxiety and OCD. I've been realizing there's patterns of perfectionism/OCD in my life and I think healing from them will be very important for me; as I've started applying these principles to my life I've already started to sense more freedom and hope in some really deep-rooted areas I've struggled with for a long time.
Thanks so much, Mark!
In my new relationship, my boyfriend has been so straightforward in expressing God's love to me. It triggered my perfectionistic fight-or-flight for sure!
I usually get hit with depression and anxiety "out of nowhere" a few months into a relationship. This time, it struck a month in. I think it is because my boyfriend has been so "in my face" with acceptance, and my perfectionistic tendencies have a hard time acknowledging my worth and accepting that kind of love.
Thank you for the healing words of encouragement and the gifts you have become equipped with through the power of the Spirit! Keep on keeping on, Mark! :)
20:46 wow this just hit me. In a way I am trying to hold that part together because I do relate by being the one who “does the right thing” been like that ever since I was a child. I sent you an email yesterday but just ignore it 😂this video has helped me stay focus and realize what’s actually going on
Thanks for sharing. Praying for you
Wow. This and you is just wow, so amazing! You don't understand what this has done to me, to my heart and mind. I relate so much to everything you said and i was always doing the figuring out of everything like u said and could never put my finger on what the actual issue was and have just felt lost, and constantly just going back to trying harder then breaking down then getting busy again make sure i do the right thing then surely that will help and i shouldn't feel or think like this etc just keep pushing them emotions fdown, forgive and move on. I feel honestly a bit speechless at how amazing this video/advice was. I would really love to get some counselling from you, please.
Thank you so much.
This is awesome. Performance in forgiveness. So been there.
Wow!! This really hit home. 😳
Somehow I needed this video… since I’m going through depression over my past decisions I did. After feeling lost in my school years.
Throughout my life, I’ve been a perfectionist. I got it from my dad since long time ago he was focused on the performance of his work and other stuff. Some of the points you’ve mentioned, I can definitely relate! Like not being allowed to express my emotions fully, about the shame taking over, being harsh on myself when I’m not feeling myself, etc.
I normally dislike myself being highly sensitive and usually think of trying to fix myself and fix my feelings, not feeling such a mess. You are right, we are broken and we are a mess. It’s learning how to embrace yourself during the midst of the emotional turmoil. I really don’t like being confused of why certain feelings pop out of the blue but this video helped me to understand the root of avoidance. Relating to being vulnerable.
It makes me wanna watch this video again, since I struggle with my thoughts and emotions. I am too vulnerable in theses areas and I believe that’s the reason why I get depressed at times along with feeling lost on what exactly to do in my life. Thank you so much for this video, it’s a blessing!
So glad it was helpful!
You got my full compasion. I can so relate. Praying for you, sister
@@rockerune My apologies I saw this late! But thank you so much for your kind words!
Thank you, I really need this right now.
Glad to hear that Lisa
This is so good
Thank you Mark!!!
God bless you ❤️
Thanks Christina!
really good points in this
I scored 10 out of 10. Perfect score (pun intended). On the road to recovery, so Im closing in on 9 now
This was helpful, thank you Mark!
Hey Mark do you mind talking about perfectionism and prayer? It’s so hard to have a healthy view of what prayer is in the midst of perfectionistic mindset. Prayer is just so hard for me.
Yeah that would be important to cover. . .
Thank you!🙏
I have known for a long time that I do self-talk. I didn't know what it was called until treatment back in the 80s. Weakness is the reason I wanted to go to Vietnam at 17. I knew if I went I would be killed or cured. Never been good with emotions because other boys in the first grade called me a "CRY BABY", well couldn't let that happen again. I've done the best I could trying to think my way through life.
Do you have a video on pure OCD? Because here you check things which you think may be bad but internally. Many religious issues will be "checked"
I feel so much pressure and stress and very much fear and anxiety.. I don't know hoe to receive God's love it's really hard to endure. I feel abused by myself....how can I find and receive God's love and grace?
I feel the same
Huh? You just described my mom and sister in the first 20 seconds. Lol I'm now malfunctioning.
By the way, you get on my nerves slapping me upside my head with all the truth you relay. I also hate to word JOURNEY", it tells me that it's not a quick fix. Until I found you I was just going to stop trying because I was not successful at much. I heard you say something like too late disease, that's how i feel now at 67.
I'm scared I won't be able to kiss a girl just right. 😲
This is a really great video and it is a blessing! I'm concerned about myself and emotions and I need to get to know them more.