Does the Funeral Industry Really Hate Caitlin Doughty?
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 8 มี.ค. 2023
- Over the past ten years, Caitlin Doughty has made waves in the US funeral industry with her advocacy and youtube channel @AskAMortician in an attempt to have the public revert to seeing death as normal and natural, and for alternative body disposal practices to be brought into effect. This has brought Ms Doughty many enemies. But what does the funeral industry outside the USA think of her? We surveyed 542 funeral workers around the world to find out.
Survey Participants:
Total 542 (US 208, Non-US 334)
US Results: Positive 108, Negative 84, Not heard 16
Non-US Results: Positive 187, Negative 71, Not heard 76)
(Yes, the stats of Non-US results are wrong in the video. Very sorry. I mistakenly included US results with the non-us results. Such an idiot. We will re-edit at some point)
#debate #usa #international #funeral #alternative #advocate
#deatheducation #TabooEducation #death #didyouknow #funfacts @AskAMortician
**SOCIALS**
FACEBOOK: / tabooeducation
INSTAGRAM: / tabooeducation
TIKTOK: tiktok.com/@tabooeducationyoutube
WEBSITE: tabooeducation.com
**LINKS & RESOURCES FROM THIS VIDEO**
Taboo Education's Video "Human Composting": • Composting Human Bodies
Ask A Mortician Video "Fighting with other funeral directors": • FIGHTING WITH OTHER FU...
Caitlin Doughty website: caitlindoughty.com/about/
Order of the Good Death website: www.orderofthegooddeath.com/s...
**Welcome to Taboo Education- Let’s Talk Death!**
Taboo Education is created by Sam (an Aussie psychotherapist) and Gary (your friendly neighbourhood ghost).
Taboo Education is a community education channel centred around the issues related to death and dying. We aim to create change in our healthcare system, legal system, and family dynamics by helping people start the death conversation with their families and themselves.
The channel covers death issues from all angles including historical, anthropological, biological, financial, environmental, and practical. We aim to provide both practical and thought-provoking videos in an often frank and humorous way in order to break the ice!
My mom died at 89 this morning.
Without Caitlin I would not have known what to do.
I knew a dead person is a meat bag whose personality had left
But I didn't know the logistics of it.
She doesn't know it but she guided me through this time.
I am sorry for your loss, and I pray that you should be comforted at your time of mourning. I love that Caitlin has given you the grounding for what to do now.
My sincere condolences for the loss of your Mother.❤
My condolences..❤
Condolences
Sorry for your loss.
I absolutely adore Caitlin and her cause.
Same!❤❤❤❤✌🏻
So do I, I really admire her.
I do too!😁💜✌️
Me too
What cause?
American millennial here. Honestly, your research into peoples’ opinions of Caitlin is basically a direct reflection of what it’s like to live in the United States, right down to a small but violently vocal minority of folks who want to take away the bodily autonomy of others. I appreciate this investigation and your channel!
true statement
Lmfao this is too real
I blame boomer lead poisoning
Perfectly sums it up.
Which sucks because it means that people who are only in their 50’s-70’s are the ones in charge. We’re a long way from the world making any sense
Her funeral home took care of my dad when he died in March 2021 at the height of the pandemic, specifically the Delta strain, which is what took him. Her staff were absolutely wonderful. They were kind, patient, and compassionate, and made the entire process as simple and straightforward as possible. She has my support, for the simple reason that she and her staff made a truly awful moment in our lives just a little less awful.
Sending you hugs, even if I don't know you 💖
@@Uapa500 thank you, your kindness is appreciated.
I'm so sorry for your loss.😢 That must have been terrible. How wonderful to work with Caitlin though. I'm glad she was able to help you and your family. ❤
That’s all that matters is that she’s not promoting a negative view of the process and actually helps do more varied practices of dealing with it.
I am sorry you lost your Dad. Unfortunately I also belong to that same club which I didn't want to be a member of. I would have loved having Caitlin care for my Dad when he passed, instead I have a horrific experience that even though it occurred in 2007, I still can't shake. It warms my heart knowing that she helped make a difference and ease the pain alittle during the worse possible time in your life. Take care of yourself and stay safe.
French embalmer here. I adore Caitlin, her advocacy is so important and meaningful. She's so right about embalming, it should be a tool used when needed and not "forced" upon the grieving families. She literally has videos with Monica Torres who is one of the best embalmers imo. Thanks for this video, very interesting. Sending love from France.
Just out of curiosity, how common is embalming in France? I live in Spain, where funerals are almost always about 24 hours after the death. Is that usual or rare in France?
@@mariaaguadoball3407 Embalming really appeared in France in 1963 since then it's become very usual to embalm, but we do suffer from the same problems as the US, embalming is often "forced" upon the families, some people even think that it's mandatory. But tbh, in France it can go up to 6 days until funerals so embalming is also very useful.
@@vithanatopraxie Interesting that France and Spain differ so much between customs.
Hello, how do embalmers find out about each other's work and techniques? I suppose you can't post pictures of your clients most of the time due to protective privacy for people grieving. Do you demonstrate and discuss on models that approximate human cadavers?
She's good friends with Monica Torres!! It doesnt mean she isnt for her cause, but believes people shouldnt be forced to embalm and that its ok to bring up other options. She's all around a believer in bodily autonomy even after death and thats why i love her
I feel like the people who keep repeating or assume Doughty hates embalming, selectively forget the videos where she's brought a professional embalmer on the show to discuss the process, even advocating for it as an option where it makes perfect sense, like in cases of body reconstruction or for elaborate extended funeral celebrations. You hit the nail on the head with how the US reacts to things, multiple options are not allowed to exist, you need to be on the winning opinion (the best) and compromise is another word for losing
That’s exactly how being an American is 😢
Understanding the cons doesnt mean someone is against it, its ridiculous. ಠ_ಠ
Some people need to learn to chill.
Well said. I wish it wasn’t true.
I didn't realise there was a Civil War connection and wonder if there is a racial undercurrent to whether a body was embalmed or not historically.
My grandmother recently passed and she is in a conservative state and we had to kinda "hide" that she wanted cremation and we spread her ashes on the property. I also brought a teaspoon size of her ashes back with me to the state I live in now because she always wanted to visit the mountain in a park we frequently hike in and she's seen pics of. Apparently that was an issue too.
Some traditions around death are bizarre, and the fact Caitlin is getting backlash for guiding people through grief is weird to me.
I don’t even understand how this has become a political issue. (I had no idea it was until reading the comments.) I am a Catholic and lean right. The Catholic Church was against cremation decades ago, but that is only because they equated fire with hell, and obviously Catholics don’t want to look like they are damning their family members to hell. Once Catholic theologists looked into it more, they realized it was silly to think burning a body could symbolize hell. As far as I know, the only thing the church considers sinful is not respecting a dead body. Ironically, doing something like embalming a body can be very disrespectful, if the person didn’t want that. Furthermore, not wanting your body to decay or get eaten implies you still think your body is important, when the soul has left, which goes against Christianity. My bet is conservatives are using religion as an excuse, because they are afraid of losing money. (Politicians are probably invested in the funeral industry or get some type of kickbacks.) Most right wing politicians don’t even go to church. They just say they are Christian because it looks good. So my guess is this is just another example of politicians siting religion to get what they want.
@@findingbeautyinthepain8965 I had no idea it was a political issue at all, that's just weird..but then again I'm Canadian and most of my family has been cremated. I don't remember the last time I went to an open casket viewing.
@@LA-mz1dd I agree, it’s super weird that it’s political. It’s like how global warming is now a political issue. It didn’t used to be that way. King Charles (Prince Charles at the time) started talking to groups about climate control 50 years ago. It wasn’t seen as political then. In fact, he was the only person saying things would get this bad if changes weren’t made. Now that it’s become a political issue, he’s been advised to stop pushing the cause, because he’s not supposed to be involved in politics. Thankfully, he’s refused to drop this cause that is so near to his heart. I hate living in a world where everything has to be seen as political.
I live in a conservative state and we had no issues getting my mother cremated, nor had to hide that she wanted to be cremated. The only people I see it being taboo among are the Catholics.
The lady who helped me before my dad's death said it's because people sometimes call the police if they find cremain chunks. The state line thing is unpleasant, there's already so much heartbreaking paperwork if you're next of kin.
The caseworker told me to just not ask permission unless it was a sacred site. Loved her.
To the second commenter, all my Catholic family gets cremated and we're in red states. It's so frustrating when people ask why we don't do burials - they're expensive and upsetting! It's 100% about profit. The Protestant burials I've been to always felt like a show of wealth, then a sadness competition to "win" more of the deceased's possessions. They make me nauseous.
Caitlin's videos are an incredible resource for processing and explaining death. Bodies are sad, but they don't have to be scary.
I am not in the funeral industry, in fact, I am in the anti-funeral industry (EMS). I am old, white, male, etc. I love Caitlin and she has really changed my wife and I’s opinions on our final arrangements. I thoroughly enjoy her shows. Thank you to her.
thank you, I will now be referring to emergency services as the "anti-funeral" industry from now on 🤣
Also “anti-funeral” industry, but absolutely pro death with dignity, DNR/DNI, advanced directives outlook as an RN OCN (oncology/hematology). As well as a 45 year old at the end stage of a super rare disease. I’m in a death-with-dignity state (thank god) and all of my paperwork is lined up. I travel with my POLST on my person at all times because I look like someone you’d code, and I don’t want to go out that way… and YOU KNOW that level of ugly. Whose to say if profusion is efficient during compressions, awareness isn’t there? Eff that!
I adore her as well! She’s fabulous!
The anti funeral industry 😂👏👏👏
I'm in the "pre-funeral industry" (hospice) and I love Caitlin!! I think she's doing great work. I think my patients dying and being laid to rest in dignity is extremely important and I'll admit that her videos have been shown to more than a few of my patients!!
I too am an EMT that loves Caitlin. I wouldn’t say we are anti-funeral industry since we have to intermingle with them so often. I am a conservative Hispanic female with an open mind to death positivity. We are eventually going to run out of room to bury all these body’s on this earth if we do not find a different way to dispose of them. I’m pretty fascinated with human composting. I think it is because I grew up in a farm, we always had gardens and we composted. Now I just need to get my husband to agree with me.
Even her haters should give her credit for making funeral directors and morticians more approachable and humane; just people like any of us and less of a creepy stereotype. An occupation among others. Many of her followers have got palpable help from her content; advice, options, or have stopped fearing death as much and accept it as the very last part of this trip. Thats huge! Her services are truly appreciated.
She sure did that for me. She’s goofy, she’s fun, she’s a total dork, and she opened my eyes about the fact that funeral professionals are just people too.
Those rightwing old men probably don’t WANT to be approachable, they want to determine what loved ones should decide: whatever is most profitable for THEM.
I have dealt with three different (Dutch) funeral directors over the past nine years, and I found them very helpful and respectful to our wishes. The only problem I have had with one of them was, that the man was most likely suffering from ADHD which made him over enthusiastic, but a word from the person I was making the funerary decisions with was enough to make the man take a step back and let his assistant take over.
She definitely helped me feel more comfortable with death. As a kid death never really made me uncomfortable, I just didn't like the idea of being burn or staying inside a coffin, but once I learned about other various ways in her videos it definitely made me more happy? Can't really word it 😆
Caitlin single-handedly erased my fear of death and everything involving death. I simply adore the way she’s helped so many people like myself. I am so glad that I learned all the options I have for my dead body.
erased your fear of death single-handedly? really?
LSD and other psychedelics did that for me, but not funeral home talk
I don't think there's a single person who is really, truly, 100% not afraid of death. If YOU truly are not afraid, at all, then I'm impressed. One of the most terrifying things to think about (for me) is death. Not the pain of dying or anything like that. But what happens after. I am a Christian and I try to grasp on to my faith, because my belief is that if I accept Jesus as my Savior, I will go to heaven. But no matter how religious you are, how SURE you are, the reality is that no one ACTUALLY knows. And the idea of that is terrifying to a paralyzing extent. If I think too deep about it I get an actual legit panic attack.
I wouldn't say she made me no longer fear death, but she did reassure me about it and did so much more than anyone else did.
@@cactuscallie5090 I on the other hand fear the pain of dying very much, but also what comes after and whether I have any kind of control about my fate after life
Same here
As someone who lives in the Florida panhandle (the Bible Belt), this sadly checks out. I love Caitlin. When I found out my dad had cancer I spiraled a little about death. I thought I was comfortable with it, having lost plenty of good friends. I had already been a fan of her channel but after the diagnosis I depended on her and her books a lot. She is such a positive force in this world and I’m truly so thankful she exists.
I, too, had an experience where I thought I was relatively comfortable with death, but then something set everything topsy turvy, and I was haunted by intrusive thoughts about what was happening to my loved one’s interred body. It kept me up at night and made functioning in an already difficult time even harder. I found my way back to Caitlin’s channel and spent a lot of time watching her videos. The information was helpful, but I think what helped most was just listening to someone talk about death and what happens to the deceased calmly and respectfully - but accurately - without excessive euphemism or the coldness of academic publications. Once I was out of the land of euphemisms and platitudes which distance people from the realities of death, my subconscious seemed to stop feeling the need to shove gory imagery into my mind at inconvenient times. Caitlin’s videos were just what I needed, and provided something I’d been unable to find anywhere else. I can think of my loved one now without panic and fear invading the memories. I will forever be grateful for that monumental gift.
@@calliea3336 I TOTALLY get that, the intrusive thoughts about all that happens to them, and us one day… it can be a lot.
Finally! A victory in Florida! Good on you.
dumb geography question (I'm not American) but is the "panhandle" refering to the part that literally looks like a handle sticking into the ocean? bible belt doesn't help my confusion
@@bakugoukacchankatsuki6434 so the panhandle of Florida refers to the top part that goes horizontally above the peninsula of the state. I’m in the northwest part, pretty close to Alabama.
Here in Germany we have something called "Friedwald" - I'd roughly translate it to "Peaceforest". The dead get cremated and a biodegradable urn is used, and the funeral is in a dedicated forest under a tree of your choice (a lot of people already have "family trees", but there are also trees with like 4-6 other spots where you'd get buried with strangers, they're cheaper and don't require as much planning and foresight). My dad and grandpa are in a Friedwald, and my uncles funeral will be there soon too. It was the most peaceful service I ever experienced, usually with 2-3 of the persons favourite songs (my dad had Nothing else matters from Metallica, for example) and a short speech dedicated to their life, done by either a religious lead like a pastor or by a close family member or hired speaker when they weren't religious. My youngest brother at the time found a funny looking branch in the forest, called it his "dad-branch" and calmly played with it on the side while the urn was lowered into the ground.
I am so happy to have this option here, and I think an open viewing or anything like that would've been almost traumatizing to me, as I have other mental health things going on.
I also have a spot under our family tree reserved for me, and it calms me to no end to know that - and I am only 30 years old now.
So I say all the power to people advocating to talk more about this topic and giving more options - it was definitely the best for my family to go with something lesser known at the time!
This is so beautiful and it sounds so peaceful 💖
I hope it spreads 💖
Ive been seeing spots online advocating this kind of burial. It used to be when family farms and estates were passed on generation after generation people would be interred at home. The forest resting place seems like it would be a close second.
My mom has already told me she wants to be buried in a Friedwald, something I whole-heartedly support.
I'm telling my parents about this
She came to Brazil a few years ago and I attended her lecture, I wasn't expecting that many people to be honest, but let me tell you, the place was packed. She's adorable and I had the pleasure to speak to her and get her autograph, she spent hours talking to people and autographing her book
Lucky!
A VERY importantly voice on the subject of death. I appreciate her for all she has done, and will do in the future.
I have learn a lot and I say THANK YOU!!!
I'm a Muslim and I respect her advocacy. When she open her mouth I love to listen from start to finish. All her contents are informative.
It doesn't hurt that her advocacy is more-or-less compatible with Muslim tradition. But then again, it's also compatible with Christian tradition. And Buddhist. And Taoist. And every other kind of "-ist" you can probably think of. The only thing she's really campaigning _against_ is an industry that is opposed to people's choice. What she is advocating for is respect for family wishes and traditional practices, as well as choice for new traditions.
Yes. As a Muslim in Malaysia, I grew up being accepting of death as a natural process & respectful of everyone's grief. Caitlin has helped me understand them from so many different perspectives, not just my own.
@@tarmaque damn straight, good sir.
@@tarmaque she also fights to ensure you know your options so you’re not taken advantage of. A lot of this system is designed to milk the family of every penny they can.
I'm Muslim too and you probably know that there is no permissible way of body disposal in Islam other than burial (no cremation, no embalming, no composting, nothing). I still watch her videos because they're super informative, especially the historical ones. Caitlin just has a sense of humor you can't help but admire, and she's taught me about decomposition, natural preservation and mummification, and other things that have only helped me admire Allah's creation even more.
As a young future mortician in the US getting ready to attend mortuary school next year, I deeply appreciate and admire what both Caitlin and you both do for the industry and death culture.
Thanks 😊 And wishing you all the best for your studies
I am clergy and I have personally asked more than 10 funeral directors and over 50 other people - none of them had heard of Caitlin. When I explained who she was and after they Goggled her and watched her videos - none of them had a problem of her! I know that she is an advocate for not wasting money of people who don't have enough money even for funerals. I am on Doughty's side completely!
I live in one of the largest cities in Germany, and one funeral parlor I pass by on my way to work each day has the German edition of Caitlin's first book displayed in their storefront window. I think while Caitlin certainly rubs many people the wrong way by questioning their established wisdom (which may not be all that wise after all) and authority, a lot of people like her precisely because of that! She does a lot of good in the world.
👉"Maybe not wise after all."
Knowledge+experience=wisdom
Caitlin is the voice of experience.
Honestly more funeral directors need to be like Caitlin. My dad passed away in 2017 and was on a ventilator for the last three days of his life. When he died, we knew we wanted cremation and no viewing because he wouldn't look like himself and we didnt want that as anyone's last image of him. I'd been watching Caitlin on and off for a bit before his passing, so I was already against just embalming for no reason. The first funeral home we went to literally just felt like a business. The director just wanted to get us in and didnt show any concern over how we were feeling. He literally wanted to hold the funeral on my birthday (my dad had past right at the start of the holiday season and two days before my sister's birthday, so we were already off to a bad start) and when I questioned him about taking the embalming off the quote since we were going for cremation his response was "we have to do it" and wouldn't give a better answer when I pressed him anout it further. We ended up going to the funeral home that was recommended by one of the nurses at the hospital, and we should have started there. Not only were they much more reasonably priced, but they also showed compassion for our loss and made sure my dad got the send off he deserved.
I'm glad you went to another funeral home. Embalming is an option, not something that is mandatory. It is only mandatory if the funeral and/or burial of the deceased is at a further date like a few weeks to a month to prevent leaks or purging of the deceased (and to give time for extended family to come to the funeral and/or burial) or if the location of the funeral and/or burial is at a long distance or oversees to prevent leaks or purging or any damage during the voyage. I'm sorry if it's hard to read this. This is just a heads up as I'm studying Funeral Education
As an RGN for 37 years we were forbidden to give details of local funeral directors. I worked un the NHS and Nursing Homes.
Thanks to Caitlin Doughty, we were able to "shop around" when my mom died suddenly. We were living in a conservative "red" state in the deep south at the height of the Covid-19 pandemic. The first funeral home we called that offered "direct cremation" charged an outrageous fee. The one we settled on catered generally to African-Americans (but others as well) and charged 1/5th what the first quoted -- one we were able to manage.
I’m a conservative Hispanic female and I love Caitlin’s her work on death positivity, and yes she is entertaining. The greed of most funeral homes and the lack of information about funeral options, are those opposing her. She is a great educator and I support her cause.
I'm from the USA and recently lost my father - Mom died two years ago. My brother and I elected NOT to embalm either parent, as we did not want a "viewing", and both of us preferred to remember our parents as they were in life. I'm a Caitlin fan :) Interestingly, my brother is extremely conservative and I'm a centrist, left-leaning. I didn't realize to embalm or not to embalm was a political "thing". My brother and I are both in our 60s.
I'm from the Netherlands where embalming is exception rather than rule. We absolutely still do viewings. All you need is proper cooling and some good make up. My Dad was burried just under a week after his passing and he looked fine.
I'm from the USA also and so many of us are lead to believe that embalming is required...even for direct cremation. My husband was upset with me that I was refusing to have his body embalmed. He didn't know why he wanted it, other than "that's just what you do!" Ah, he'll be dead, he won't know the difference!
@@bun04yyou should respect your husband's death wishes. That's a talk to have *before* someone dies
@@msjkramey We've had the talk and I convinced him that since he wants a closed casket, that embalming isn't an expense that we should incur. We went to a funeral planning seminar yesterday and after being totally immature about it (he wanted a naked viewing!) He admitted that he really doesn't want a viewing at all.
I honestly hate viewings because I'd rather remember those who passed as they were the last time I saw them alive, and I've had some very wonderful final goodbyes (obviously I didn't know I would never see them alive again but I wouldn't change a thing about that last meeting). I remember having a panic attack as my mother tried to drag me into the room the viewing was held in for someone I considered my brother (I have no siblings) because I didn't want to see him dead. My last words to him were "goodbye, I love you" and the smile and goodbye I received was what I wanted to remember. Caitlin made me feel so much better about that. I love her.
Caitlin has done soooo much to promote a healthy conversation surrounding death and the death industry. I really appreciate her and her videos.
I am a Canadian and both of my adoptive parents were cremated and not embalmed before hand. Our Dad was given the choice to have our Mom embalmed and he said ,"No!". He didn't like the idea of her body being subjected to anything else after the battle she had had with Cancer. When he passed away 20 years later, he didn't even have a funeral! He wasn't embalmed either....so we do have choices here in Canada.
I am from Alberta and only option I KNOW we have for sure is burial. I plan to do more research and I'm mostly curious if death care is varied province to province... Cool to see another Canadian online :)
When my father passed he was sent to the funeral home and before I had walked in the door to sign papers and agreements they had already started prepping him for embalming. When I declined they tried to change my mind and then told me it was against state laws for people not to be embalmed.
Unfortunately for them I don't think they expected me to have done my homework showing the TN burial guidelines/rules. Then they tried to say they would have to charge me extra for not embalming my father and include a vault. I informed them either they could do as requested or they could lose the service all together.
I am of the opinion they had already started the procedure and stopped midway. The look of panic on his receptionist belied the truth of the situation.
As an American I love the idea of body composting. For the past couple of years my daughter has given me marigolds grown at school for a Mother's Day present. Every fall I deadhead them and plant the next generation of seeds the following year. When I finally leave this mortal coil I would love for my daughter to use my compost to plant the marigold seeds so even after death I can help them and my child to grow. Until I watched Caitlin I didn't realize that was even a possibility.
Oh goodness, this actually made me "awww" out loud. What a lovely memorial idea!
My dad loved marigolds and would do the same for me from his garden
It's such a lovely thought 💖
After dealing with three funeral homes in the past decade, I see them as money making pits. After telling the undertaker we just wanted the body cremated and didn’t want a yacht to take our loved one at sea ,we would just take the ashes out and scatter them ourselves. He just looked defeated, knowing he wasn’t gonna make a ton of money off of us.
I'm Canadian, and thankfully when my stepdad died two years ago, they didn't push fancy urns or other bs we didn't need. They let us browse their literature at our leisure, but gave us no grief over bringing our own vessel for his ashes. I don't know if this is indicative of all Canadian crematoriums, if they knew we were too poor, or if we just looked as wrecked as we felt (it was complicated and far too close to home). Maybe we just got lucky, who knows. I am sorry for your losses, we've had the same kind of ten years as you, and I'm glad we're all here to share our experiences with each other.
@@rosegroshek1218 The Direct Cremation pricing is the same as what I can find here in Ohio, coming in maybe a little higher for a viewing as well. Which, to be fair, at that point your using it more as a venue, and the work goes up. It seems to me she just wants people to be informed and aware of their options. Also, technically she's no longer tied with that funeral home.
Caitlyn Doughty has been such a positive influence in my life. Her first book is the only one I bought on Audible.
Her continued work has been amazing and I'm so grateful to be in the same timeline as her.
ETA: Omg it's been at least 10 years since I became one of her Deathlings.
Wow. 60yo American male from Alabama here. I love "Ask a Mortician!" I sort of knew how embalming was accomplished before that, and felt it was disrespectful to treat a body so harshly. Watching a well-known enbalmer's channel sealed it for me. I told my parents how it was done when my grandmother died and we buried her unenbalmed. Still with casket and vault though. Did my father the same way, and that's what my mother wants. I had my partner cremated, and I guess I will be too, but what I think is best is direct burial in a wood box where you literally return to the earth. My second biggest concern with embalming is the chemicals, but I am not militant about any of it. But personally, I lean towards the green side of things...direct burial, composting, aquamation, etc.
I am:
65
Female
Republican
And I LOVE Caitlin. I always wanted to be cremated. After watching her videos and reading all 3 of her books I am now arranging a green burial at a local conservation area. She has changed my thoughts about death and I no longer fear the end of my life.
Okay?
That's great !!
I agree 💯. I have Cancer and have my Death with Dignity papers and meds.
I want a mushroom suit or composting. Which just became legal in California.
I am excited about the next adventure 🤠
So, 100% pure inquisitive question, just out of curiosity and I don't know, cultural science? So if I phrase my question in a way that seems judgy or anything, please please give me the benefit of doubt that I'm just trying to ask in a way out of pure innocent curiosity....with as much baggage as asking what you favorite color is. Like, pretend we're putting on lab coats and just want to poke at how the human brain works.
How have you found that it's important to put your political standing as part as your descriptor? Do you find it's common with the people in your age group? Is it something that's is important for you to mention because you really feel it's important for others to know this part about you and your personality, or is it something that just feels expected because it's common place to do so? Question #2: What about Caitlin's work that you believe a 'typical Republican' should/would be against?
Again, think of me like a middle schooler asking questions for a project, but with genuine curiosity behind it. I've wanted to ask so many others why the format in posting....and you just happen to be the one I ask. Mainly because Caitlin is wholesome, so I'm gonna assume you are wholesome.....and the commenters on Fox News scare me little.
She's responding to the description given of the majority of those in the United States who oppose Caitlin, which included that they were Republican.
I’m a retired RN that worked in Hospice… I think Ms. Doughty is outstanding. She makes death less scary with much more choices in how you/ family wants to remember you. It also educates people about about the choices prior to death so it’s not left to significantly others and families ⭐️
My father passed in 2019 and her content is the ONLY content I can watch that doesn’t make me super sad. I love her.
When I found Caitlin's channel, I had a nebulous idea of wanting to "become a tree" when I passed. Nebulous in part because I was terrified of death. But finding her content has given me a much better understanding of what options there are and lessened my fear over death. It's also helped me approach grief in a different direction than before. I know now with certainty I want to be composted and am hopeful that with advocacy like that of Caitlin's, it'll be possible when i get there.
My dad died just a couple of weeks ago, very suddenly. I'm form Germany so most of the regulations and laws Caitlin speaks about don't apply to me, still having watched a bunch of her videos in the past has helped me to grapple with the situation. My dad is the first person I've ever lost and I'm completely devastated, but at least I'm not frozen in shock or helplessness. Even people who dislike her opinions about embalming and different funeral methods, should at least credit her for bringing attention to death in a save and 'lighthearted' setting, because at some point you'll get confronted with it no matter what.
Deepest condolences 🙏
I’m so sorry for your loss, and I hope that you can find some peace and comfort in the loving memories that you have of your father.
I'm sorry to read of your father's death. It will be hard for awhile but the thing I've learned is to lean into your grief, meaning if you need to cry, cry. If you feel sad, feel sad. Don't try to ignore or push those feelings away. I pray you will find comfort in memories of your father, though at first those memories may cause some tears. Take care.
I can't believe that Caitlin would have "Haters"! She is a genuine, kind, wealth of information Woman. She has taught me sooooooo much. I would hope my fellow Canadians would feel the same🇨🇦
The haters are only the pushy funeral industry and its directors.
I’m a filthy ‘MURICAN 🦅 and I agree
When you hit someone in their wallet, hate becomes very easy to find. Caitlin's advocacy means more informed clients who are prepared and aren't easy marks to fleece money off of. And that's why we need more people like her in the industry.
I am a End- of- life worker. It is the thing I do best; I love my “work” and cannot think of anything else I would rather be doing!!! I have learned so much from Caitlin …. In my professional and my private life, I have used her information for such good. I saved so many people from spending so much money unnecessarily. We can all learn so much from her!
Caitlin’s videos helped me overcome my fear of death and mortality, I love her and her cause, she is an amazing woman 🖤
Caitlin is everything ❤. She is so intelligent, grounded and funny. She is single handedly responsible for getting me past my death and funeral phobia.
As a histologist(pathology), I found her information sensitive, reliable and open to other belief practices(green), which people don't know when thrown in these situations. Because we all are going to live forever in the US, right? If death wasn't such a taboo here, people could prepare for their own mortality. Bravo Caitlin! I do miss you on TH-cam.
Haters keep scrolling, no one is making you watch the videos. You have options too, like in death.
Somehow, your response set an old Tom Lehrer song going in my head -- "We Will All Go Together When We Go".
Her content has really made me think less intensely about death and grief. Maybe to a fault since I think my cousins thought I was crazy how casual I was at my grandmother's funeral. She is certainly a gift to everyone :)
Our culture is messed up in regards to death and mortality. It's not a fault of yours that you could see a bigger picture than they could.
Reading “Smoke Gets in Your Eyes” was almost a conversion experience for me. I realized a lot of my attitude that dead bodies were creepy had been created by the distance we’re put between ourselves and the dearly departed. Why for instance did the mortuary employees insist we go away as they moved my fa-in-law’s body to the transport? Were they going to bang him around, or were we suddenly to fear someone we loved an hour ago? I don’t know if I’d be up to washing and dressing the deceased as our ancestors did, but I do believe I could accompany them on their last physical journey now.
I don't really get why Caitlin's topics get support (or not) along political lines; I'm pretty darn conservative and I love her videos and her advocacy. I think that we as Americans wouldn't feel such repugnance toward death if we were more involved in the death process with our loved ones. Her videos really encourage us all to understand what the death/burial/etc. process is without judgement.
Yeah, as an Aussie i found it strange. So did a lot of non-US people i spoke with. From an outsider perspective it does look like absolutely everything is attached to a political side over there, which i find a little scary
@@TabooEducation it’s scary for us in the US as well 😔
I had absolutely no idea her videos were political or politicized. I'm as conservative as they come. A stay at home homeschooling Christian mom. I like her videos and agree with take on the funeral industry. Why wouldn't I? And how on earth is it political?
In general terms of conservatism and liberalism, and I will try hard not to generalize, many conservatives prefer more of the status quo and if change is needed, are slow to make those changes because it goes against their perceived norms and mores. Liberalism is a way of changing the status quo, and challenging norms and mores of society. Neither path is wrong, nor right, but does help society move forward, and adapt to changes society needs to evolve.
@@RichKohli2 I would say that that maybe were true about a hundred years ago, it's absolutely not reflective of what we've had in the past 60 years at least.
It's not true in any way today.
I'm a 69 yr old, female, retired professional. I've had a hate-hate relationship with the funeral industry. I pretty much feel the families of recently deceased were taken advantage. I've even offered to help friends wade through the death process. I love Caitlin. She was a breath of fresh air. No, I don't want to be composted. lol. But have told my family to use my ashes to plant trees. And....I'm a Republican.
I live amongst Republicans. I think I might be one of seven people here who isn't, and that's because I don't think capitalism is the future, nor do I subscribe to the cult of it, where being critical isn't allowed so turning a blind eye towards the failings is just basic SOP.
There's nothing wrong with being republican. Everyone I know, and that's 1000s, are good people. They want the same things I want, we just disagree in how to get there.
Now, by and large, your average republican in my area doesn't give two shits if your gay, feels abortion should be legal but doesn't feel it should be elective birth control (but that that should be educated into people, not legislated), dislike corruption as much as anyone else, and have no faith in the government to solve today's problems.
We don't necessarily disagree on any of that, although I think public options are necessary to keep private greed in check, as well as I'm a huge proponent for open transparency (will never happen with private industry) and dilution of power (again, no one gives up power peacefully. That's why we know the name of Cinncinatus 2000y later, it's that rare). The public has no recourse against private industry, and some things monopoly is the only option, like power distribution, sewers, hospitals, etc. We can't have 24 companies each running their own power lines, etc. No industry that relies on the commons should be shielded from the commons, but that's not the reality we live in.
I think our politics are mainly generational. Boomers or gen x coming up during rhe Reagan boom are pretty solidly republican. Because then, that's what worked. I graduated in 99. I'm 42. It's been political fuckery (obstructionism, the 2000 election coup, stealing Supreme court seats, the 2016 insurrection, repealing Roe), or a once in a lifetime giant market crash every 7 years.
Simply put, the 'left' are people who want reform. The 'right' want to conserve things how they are (centrists), roll back education, and female rights (evangelicals), or open nazis.
Idk anyone under 45 who is a republican. Change will come, one way or another.
And Gen z, being raised with school shooting drills, is vastly against the 2A. And the founding fathers left means for them to repeal it if that's what they decide to do.
Makes me think of The Big Lebowski “this is our most modestly priced receptical”
I found her right after I woke up from a doomsday cult and left it, so she has helped me come to terms with mortality and death positivity has helped me greatly! I hope that more people find her and are helped by her~
Good for you for having the strength to leave. So many people are not able to do what you did. You are amazing.
This is such a well balanced video and I am HERE for it. As an American I don't understand why media in the US is so black and white and I wish things were presented so beautifully. I GREATLY appreciate all the time and effort you took to make this video. It's so refreshing to have such clearly delineated and presented statistics. Instant subscriber. Thank you!
My grandmother died a little over a year ago. I already had been watching Caitlin's videos for some time then and I noticed how I was surprisingly prepared emotionally compared to the deaths of other grandparents I experienced before I found her channel. Her videos helped me alot to change my view on death and she encouraged me to be more involved with the funeral. I had the courage to grieve in my own personal way by picking out her funeral outfit, drawing her memorial picture, and wearing the last piece of clothing she gifted me to her funeral (even though it wasn't "funeral appropriate") since fashion and art is what my grandma and I often bonded over
I still was distraught and I will miss her until the end of my life but Caitlin's videos help me live with those feelings and not drown in them, which I am so so grateful for
As a US citizen myself, Caitlyn has opened my eyes to many things and I love her work.
It's sad that what we're working through is negatively impacting people's views in other countries and causing undue worries.
I'm one of the guilty parties mentioned that credits Caitlin as my reason for getting into the industry at 25. I am glad to hear other countries' perspectives! Neat video, thanks!
Former US Mortician: Caitlin is amazing and everything I wanted to change when I got into the business. The 8:00-minute mark is exactly why I got pushed out of the industry. I asked questions and that wasn't okay.
Her content helped me to process grief. And to think about death in more healthy terms, without overbearing terror.
Thank you for a wonderful unbiased opinion! Caitlin has helped me realize the alternate ways for me to be laid to rest when I die and the the rights my family has !
I agree, except that what you are calling "unbiased" is much more restrained than truly balanced - partly because if I were to accurately describe the bias of many of those old white men who attack Caitlin, I would very quickly loose credibility because of the extreme nature of the history those guys are trying to defend...
My nan passed away 5 1/2 years ago and when she passed i had so many questions that i wasn't comfortable asking family , Caitlin was there to answer my questions through her videos. My Grandad passed just over 3 weeks ago and through finding Caitlin's channel all those years ago helped me with the process that happens and i was able to help get him ready before his funeral by shaving his beard as the funeral directors wouldn't do any of the personal care that we felt needed to be done as he was a proud man who would take regular care of his hair and beard when he was well enough but for the weeks before he was in hospital so couldn't do this without Caitlin's videos I wouldn't have known that I could ask to do this. thank you Caitlin for teaching me about death and making me comfortable enough to help my grandad one last time.
I adore Caitlin! Her sense of humor, the way she educates and entertains. And her hair, she has great hair! ❤❤❤❤
I love Caitlin and her content. I feel like I’ve learned a lot more history from her videos than I did in school.
I used to work in the funeral industry and I loved Caitlin’s videos. As you can imagine, I didn’t agree with all her views but I admired her passion and respect for the death process, her attitude as to being entertaining was what made her so easily accessible.
Caitlin perpetuates kindness and love and empowering the public with knowledge. I am not involved with the funeral industry at all, but she has been someone I've admired for years. She has shined a light on many issues, not just embalming. People who are ignorant and afraid of innovation and change may fear what she says without realizing she never condemned anyone who feels embalming is important to their grieving process. I remember her main message is to understand that there is no "correct" way to grieve and you should know that you have control and agency when you find yourself in the worst moments of your life. I have bought her books, used her information to start conversations with my family about death planning and their wishes and my own. I'm in Kentucky, and my mother never wants to be embalmed. Caitlin helped me understand that when the time comes, I can honor my mothers wishes. How can gently offering information in an entertaining way about the most depressing topic be anything but a public service?! Caitlin is a Queen, she is "mother", style icon, rule breaker, trend setter.... In closing, Caitlin for President.
Caitlin is the reason I don't have a CRIPPLING fear of death anymore
US here. Im a carer for an elder, dementia patient. She's been on a slow decline that periodically has a faster pace for several years now. It's been quite difficult to bear witness to something like this. And I can only imagine the level of fear and anxiety and uncertainty my patient might be feeling.
I stumbled across Ask a Mortician at the beginning of the pandemic right after I got sick the first time, fearing for my patients, fearing for myself (I've had covid four times now, two of which got scarily bad), and the level of panic and anxiety I was feeling was overwhelming.
Watching her videos, among others in the medical field specifically dealing with things like end of life care, dementia, and other related content creators in these types of fields, really helped me to process a lot more than i think I could have done on my own.
It helped me to feel more comfortable and confident in death planning. It helped me feel more at ease with my own inevitable demise. And it helped me to really have a stronger, better informed grasp of what i actually wanted for myself in that event, and how to better advocate for those i care for in the event of their potential passing before me.
I really appreciate Caitlin so, so much. Her advocacy, her information, is better than a lot of what is available, especially here in the US. There was already so much mistrust here, way before Ask a Motician was even an idea. She isn't perfect in all of her nuances, but I find her to be profound nonetheless, and I thank her for how much she has given, at least to me personally.
I found /Caitlin 3 yrs ago and because of her, became a Death Doula. I found the information she offers to be very educational and told in a fun way. Death happens...might as well know your options!
I'm not in the funeral industry, but I adore Caitlin. She is so open, and it has given me a lot to consider about my own death.
I'm an Australian living in Czechia, & I've found Caitlin's information very inspiring & supportive of my own views. I think she emphasises the need to check regulations in your own region often, & I'm glad you mentioned that your channel started as an Australian response to her work. Anglo-based societies seem to want any mention of death to be kept at arms length, whereas here, & in the Balkans, where I've also lived, people are at their families graves regularly, maintaining them with flowers & candles. I'm hoping for a green burial myself, but when you mention Singapore, & the need for space-saving memorials, I thought of the Japanese Buddhist cemeteries that use crystal statues of Buddha, lit up to remember the deceased. You get a card with an embedded chip, so that you can highlight the Buddha in front of your friend or relatives ashes. It looks so serene & beautiful. You're right when you say that there doesn't only have to be one method of body disposal. There are creative solutions that just add possibilities, rather than replace deeply-held traditions.
l
I live in the United States and I agree with you. I don't like what some of my fellow Americans do it saddens me greatly and is very scary when they are so hateful. As you said they are a minority but a very loud one. Thankfully most of us are not that way. The majority of us are very tired of a lot of it also and are trying to change the narrative in a lot of ways. So thank you for sharing this very well put together video about this. I think Caitlin Doughty is amazing in what she is doing and I am a 72 year old Christian white man.
Hi, Sam! American Deathling here . . . I never knew about your channel until it popped up in my feed this morning (27 April 2023). My wife and I have been watching Caitlin for several years now, and we appreciate two things about her and her tales on dying, death, and the funeral industry.
First, she treats her subject with dignity and respect, AND a healthy dose of humor. Typically, that humor is NOT dark, even though it IS about a subject many perceive as dark and foreboding. Second, she absolutely concentrates on an American audience and American funeral practices (and occasionally MALpractices). It's not too hard to explain: she's an American, her audience is primarily American, and she is in the American funeral industry.
Oh, and she's charismatic, too. That always helps when you're a TH-camr.
The unfortunate thing is that we Americans tend not to talk about death until someone's dead. That makes it a lot harder to have an intelligent, informed conversation about death, dying and body disposal. Me? I'm with George Carlin, who famously said, "When I die, I don't want any of that funeral s[p]it. Don't want to be cremated, either. I wanna be BLOWN UP! (explosion noise) . . . There he goes, God love him!"
But I'm sure she'd love to hear more about funerary practices from around the world. I know I would, and I'm glad your video about "Death Mother" showed up in my feed today. Thanks! I'll be subscribing to your channel.
I know this is getting long, but I'd like to ask: you said you had two Master's degrees. I'm guessing that one's a Psychology degree. What's the other?
Finally . . . . "Bentham's Head!"
Hi, welcome to the channel! To answer my degrees we're in social science, Psychotherapy, and public health
Only the first two are relevant for the channel...but we did do a video on necrophilia, so I guess the third did come in handy after all
@@TabooEducation, interesting . . . suddenly, ANOTHER Tom Lehrer song springs to mind: "The Masochism Tango".
But for a little more about me, I, too, have two Master's degrees. The first was a Master of Science degree in Studies of the Future, and the second will be a Master of Arts in Sociology. I worked on a PhD in the subject for 12 years, but realized after completing all my course work that narcolepsy was making it EXTREMELY difficult to finish. So my advisor let me know that they could award a MA based on the work I'd done.
And now I'm curious if you're familiar with the Sexplanations channel on TH-cam . . . .
Hayden’s Head
@@Rotten_Ralph, Bentham's Head . . . .
I had always been scared of my father dying. He was older and ill most of my life. Through her work I was able to process and accept his decline ahead of time. We were lucky enough to use Clarity as our mortuary. It was beautiful and they were so kind
As a healthcare worker and deathling of Caitlyn’s I adore her. She has taught me so much about the funeral industry. When my dad passed unexpectedly in 2011 Caitlyn’s info helped myself and my siblings make affordable and personal choices for my fathers funeral. I have also been able to determine how I want my last wishes carried out. I hate the markups funeral homes pass on to clients. I also love green burials and alternative cremations such as water cremation. She is a pioneer. And her info has helped countless people learn the ins and outs of funeral homes and the industry.
Although I am a gay man, and was raised in Southern California; I am a white Christian; clean-cut and straight-laced looking as they come; I have lived in north Georgia since 1994 (since I was 17); and consider myself a Libertarian/Republican, and as hardcore and staunch of a conservative as there can be. Any and all of this notwithstanding, I love the work Caitlin Doughty does. I have been watching her for years, and although she is entertaining and has just an overall cute personality, her subject matter is also very interesting, and her insights very informative. I consider the practice of just wrapping our bodies in a shroud and dumping us in a hole in the ground, to be much more inline with Christian traditions, than pumping our carcasses full of caustic and deadly chemicals, to preserve us in the resource draining practice of building expensive caskets or coffins, and surrounding us and all of it within a cement vault. Plus, I really don’t care for the concept of contributing to the yearly leaching of 800,000 gallons of formaldehyde into the soil and possible water sources for the futures of the living. All for the preservation of what exactly? Some vague and ridiculous notion that doing so will somehow mollify the feelings of loss which are sure to be felt by our surviving loved ones? This idea is absurd even on its face, and our loved ones will just have to deal with it, as have countless loved ones in every generation. At least if just thrown in a hole, we could be a possible resource for animal and plant life. And even if either outcome is remote, I would certainly rather die with the possibility of being some future benefit, over being a cause of some future human catastrophe.
I found you looking up a new video on Caitlin- thank you for the unbiased information. I think the response to Caitlyn is a bit of a microcosm of our entire polarized US political system. I love Caitlyn and have learned so much about body autonomy from her channel and of course so much amazing and random information about funerals and death in general.
Yup! It’s just that! It’s the ones who are trying to take away the abortion pill, and the ones that took away Roe. We WILL get them back, I’m sure. When old white men’s daughters start dying because of childbirth/or pregnancy, maybe they’ll understand what we’ve been trying to say to them.!
What interesting research, kudos on such a large sample size for such a specific topic! I love Caitlin's work but as a Canadian, it's very refreshing to hear reflections about the americanization of information. Being so close to the US (90% of Canadians live within 160km of the US border), it can be hard to discuss the influence of American culture without some people getting deep south republican angry about any perceived critique. I imagine some of your interviews were quite eye-opening!
Seeing the Ask a Mortician channel is what got me to ask my parents and in turn them to ask their parents about what we want for our bodies after death. So many, like in my family, never even thought about it or actively avoided thinking about it. So unless we asked, it was likely they would end up embalmed or cremated without a say in it. Turns out most of us are keen on natural, unembalmed burials with little more than a pinebox. No chemicals for me, thanks Caitlin! 😁💐
I have lived about 2 hours away from LA (Riverside,California) my entire life. Caitlin and I are about the same age, and even though I've never met her personally, I've been a fan of her work for several years since she started her channel. I love history, and even the morbid facts are things that have always been what she focuses on. I'm not a mortician and the only death I really get involved in is my own families. (I sort of gave myself the title of 'guardian' in my family because I'm the one who takes care of the graves, headstones, and family that has passed on and their 'interests')
I was lucky and I wasn't 12 until I lost my first family member and it . . . .didn't go well. When you don't talk about death, when you are so far removed from it, a kid who loved her great grandmother very much and didn't understand that NO, she wasn't in fact 'just sleeping' when she was buried and in no way was still alive when her casket was observed being put in the round and covered. Rough couple of years as a teenager whose mind just filled in the blanks that were left when losing family members and death are so far removed from conversation let alone in practice.
Here in the states, we are very far removed from the death experience and processes. Yes, we are shameless capitalists in America and funeral services can rack up a bigger bill then a marriage or birth . . . . however I've always felt particularly irritated and frustrated with the funeral industry, how many funeral directors and attendants are nothing more then Used Car Salesmen praying on the grief, mourning, suffering, and pain of greaving famliles. We saw it up close when my paternal grandfather passed away in 2003. My grandmother was in shock and it was difficult for her to even comprehend reality, let alone make informed and non-emotional decisions. The Forest Lawn guys in Cypress, seemed to sense this and they took full advantage. My dad and his brothers and sisters were luckily there to help my Grandmother (so those people wouldn't have gotten like a golden casket or upgrades like casket gaskets for 'ziploc' freshness that we all know is pointless). My dad, aunts and uncles were all so disgusted with the way she was treated when she was at her most vulnerable, all 5 of them immediately to make choices and decisions and their death arrangements within months of my Grandpa's passing.
I feel like the family should absolutely have the final say over how the body of their loved one is treated, and should be free to be as involved or as hands off as THEY choose. I don't like the commercialized way that we as America have treated death is good or healthy. Even talking about it too much is taboo and bothers others a great deal. We are so far removed from death that alot of people have never even seen a dead body, even if they have lost people and family in the past. It's such a rarity to see a dead body let alone a loved one that we will pay tens of thousands of dollars, sight unseen, for perfect strangers to care for their dead once they passed on. This has also opened up room for criminal activity as we trust that our dead loved ones would be as respected and cared for as we ourselves would care for them. Malpractice in funeral homes and crematories. It HAS happened, and it doesn't not happen or go away if we don't talk about it. In fact those criminal activities are encouraged to flourish and thrive if we continue to make the subject taboo, "Evil grows in the dark".
While I was a junior enlisted member of the US Air Force, I was on the Base Honors Team at both Nellis AFB, Nevada and Travis AFB, California. I've been to a LOT of funerals. What I've observed is that funerals are for the benefit of the living. And having seen so many people grieving at funerals, I COMPLETELY get how unscrupulous funeral home operators can take advantage of the living family members.
@@johndemeritt3460 Thank you! I came to that understanding a while back. I realize that post I made was long and rambling LOL. It's what happens when you can type as fast as you think.
But yes! I came to this understanding a while ago and once I explain it to other people who feel weirded out by going to funerals or think they can't, what it actually is is to support and love the ones who are hurting and grieving for the loss of a loved one. It really does change your perspective on alot of things once you understand that.
Canadian reconciliation practitioner, here - fabulous video (especially the cute puppy). Something for the embalmers to consider is watershed contamination.
Recall that indigenous persons and reservations are also the domain of the Department of the Interior, along with "wildlife management" - pubs.usgs.gov/sir/2018/5120/sir20185120.pdf
I live in North America and I was born American with my European family ties and I was under the impression for many years that embalming was a necessary practice and I believe everyone has their right to elect to do what they want with their own bodies for their own funeral process, but I love the alternative of embalming and am pleased to know that it’s not mandatory.
Thank you so much for this well researched and informative response and I genuinely appreciate your channel and also appreciate the views of Caitlin as well.
I am not a typical American respectfully as I personally like to know all aspects about a subject and I do not harbor negative opinions towards others who do not share my views on any particular subject as it is a basic human right to question and form opinions about any subject.
Keep up the great work my Aussie friends!
aside from just the funeral industry, her documentaries are some of my favorite pieces of media i've ever encountered. I am an incredibly anxious person, and will probably alway fear death to a degree, but Caitlin helps me feel a lot more comfortable around it, and also is simply one of the most interesting youtube channels I've ever found
I love Caitlin. I want to become a mortician and she is an inspiration.
Go for it!! 😁
Dewit
I adore Caitlin, and I am so grateful for her videos. She has TOTALLY changed my approach to my own death and the preparation for it. She takes the mystery and scariness out of the topic and makes the whole subject of death so much more approachable. She is a treasure.
YAY! an Aussie Channel (Instant sub). I'm a counsellor and I am subscribed to her channel. I have found many little pieces of facts that have been useful spoken from the perspective of a different professional outlook. In some her disaster videos, the information she highlights about the historical lack of grief counselling and people's perceptions of death throughout history and also points on tangible loss, including pets in grief can not be ignored. Unfortunately I'm not surprised by the various degrees of opinions about her from peers and other professionals within the mortuary profession in the US (Especially the more venomous rivalry). I have had quite a number of very intense conversations (If I could call them that) with US mental health professionals just from asking honest and short questions. To be honest, I would much rather do a session with a person court referred for anger issues or anyone with various severities of borderline personality disorder than to try to bracket my feelings listening to those "professionals" again. Hence I can somewhat empathise with the level of shock (if that's the right word) you might have felt.
having needed to plan two funerals - my dad in 2002 and my mother in 2012. i didn’t know better about a lot of these things and it was very expensive. fast forward 10 years.. a little wiser…. still expensive but not as much. because of caitlin, i have made my wishes known to my family that i want human composting and my remains put into conservation land to feed trees.
Omg I live in the Bible Belt and you are so spot on with the hate and illogical bs here. I love Caitlin and especially love what she taught which helped so much with the conversations with my mom before she passed. She was cremated by they way.
I've been following Caitlin for about 2 years now. I love her style and approach. Very educating watching her, and not just on the funeral industry, but history in general. One thing I'd like to ad (and I have mentioned it on Caitlins channel) is that my mom passed away on Dec 26, 2021. It was unexpected and she was 85 and in good health. Passed away in her favorite recliner in the tv room while taking her normal mid morning nap. Anyway, Caitlins style helped put a smile on my face through that time. She was that friend who understood the moment and made it all right, of which I thank her for. It's not every day that someone you have not met can have such an impact on another. Well, you have a new subscriber here....have a great day....
Hello, 👋. First time here. This video was suggested, guess because I follow Caitlan. Since I am American I love to get perspectives on how people from other countries see us. And I love to learn about other countries' cultures. I do not want to be one of "those" Americans. Your insights into American culture was a direct hit. Our views are becoming more black and white. In the last two decades we have become so polarized. There is no gray. There is no middle ground, no compromising, no understanding of the other person's views.
The funeral industry and perspectives on Caitlin was another way that it shows. I really enjoyed your video.
I'm from one of the Bible belt states but I find Caitlin to be quite uplifting. She gives you a lot to think about. I simply love her.
I'm in the usa and i love Caitlin's work. death culture here is extremely varied and nuanced just based on the extremely diverse population, but overall it's seen as taboo. you're not supposed to age, you're not supposed to think about dying (which is ironic considering, you know, everything...). Caitlin's work talking candidly about death and about the treatment and preparation of bodies is revolutionary here. it's just not talked about. people don't know what to expect or what the process is, and the mystery makes it even more frightening. she has brought me a lot of peace and comfort.
Have literally sent my Mom her video about natural death burial, and said this is what I would like. Take what other’s find useful and ashes to ashes dust to dust. I no longer fear death for myself, and I no longer fear the goodbyes I have had with those that I Love that have just passed. I only struggle with missing them on the inside. She did that. I don’t know how. She opened my eyes. And I Thank her for it so much
I'm not from the US, but her videos made me feel more open about death, more so preparing for it and that it's not something to be scared of. She opened my eyes to different ways of preparing for the body of a loved one. The thing is, I always thought embalming is just a natural thing because all the funerals I went to, the body is always embalmed. So knowing there are more options is eye opening. She also, made me feel like preparing for your death (ie, making a will, getting plans ready), is okay. I once asked my mother if I could get a funeral plan, and she got absolutely mad, asking if I was wishing for an early death.
This was an incredibly fascinating video to watch and I commend those involved for the time and work put into it. I'm personally a big fan of Caitlin, growing up as an extremely anxious child and still being an extremely anxious adult, her videos have definitely helped ease some of my fear around death. I also think her type of advocacy is extremely important for allowing people to have bodily autonomy, even in death
I love Caitlin. Because of her I better understood death and how to cope with the loss of my father. I lost my father at a very young age and it scared me for a while about death, I had nightmares and fears galore. But watching her videos I I was reminded that it's just natural, and there is nothing to fear.
I really like Caitlin's advocacy. She's educated me on many different ways death and funerals can be handled. Not just the typical burial or cremation that is the norm in culture. I also have enjoyed her TH-cam content for quite a few years now. Also though her I came upon this video on my main page and thus more death acceptance related content! May Caitlin continue to do her thing for as long as she's able!
I found Caitlin's channel years ago by chance and it's become one of my favorites. Her deep compassion for the dead and their living loved ones is really wonderful to see. Add to that with the amount of research she clearly does, and how she tries to include other voices in her videos is a great way to help people feel more comfortable around death. The knowledge of alternatives is SO important. I've never wanted a traditional burial and hearing her so openly advocate for those alternatives really made me feel validated. Death is so deeply personal and the fact that anyone thinks they have the right to dictate what people do with their own bodies even after death is disgusting (obviously within reason, dumping your ashes as Disney is just rude).
Thank you so much for taking the time to stand next to this Beautiful lady, she advocates for all our loved ones who are at the end of their journey here on earth.
Caitlin has made death a topic of conversation the norm again.
Through her I have now found you 🎉
Gaynor
Liverpool England 🇬🇧
I have been following Caitlin since she started her channel. I have read all of her books. I feel she has given us great information on death, and to advocate for ourselves before we die.
Came across ASK A MORTICIAN 2020. I have been a fan ever since. Her approach to death,and death related issues, using entertaining is great. You go away with knowledge you didn't have before ,and enjoyed learning it.
My Dad did funeral dirrecting for a short time, he disliked embalming process and the force he felt was put on grieving families to embalm, get the most expensive coffin, and head stone. Where he was based was a profit fueled area in a small town. He saw a lot of things he really found abhorrent. So when he was dying he decided that he would do things in a more greener way, he would have enjoyed Caitlin's videos.
I loved this video and i love Caitlin’s channel. I’m a teenager and i used to be very scared of death and i viewed the funeral industry very grimly. After my grandmother died she was embalmed and she had an open casket and I had heard my mother say that “it looked nothing like her”. I never looked myself because i was too scared. I think i stayed away from death and the funeral industry because of that and the constant negative perception that is often pushed. After watching her channel and learning about what is means to be a mortician, to work as one, the experiences she has (positive and negative), and the stories she tells about others really made me more comfortable with death and morticians. I do also agree with the entertainment aspect that was mentioned by the study participants. I was initially hesitant to watch her videos because of the “grim” topics but the way she words everything, her general mood, and just everything about her made me feel a lot more comfortable watching her videos. I have even shown her videos to my family multiple times and rewatch them constantly. I’m very glad she has such the reach she does.
"Much has changed since the civil war." Heh, not in some parts of the US.
As a Forensic Examiner I have a deep respect and dare I say deep love for Caitlin! Her work is expansive, well researched and have touched me on many levels. Apologies for that hate you may have found here in the USA. Sad indeed. Thanks for this!!
I adore Caitlin. Her work and advocacy have given me peace after becoming a widower, as well as helping family understand my sister's desire for a Green burial, also inspired by our childhood exposure to the comic book Swamp Thing, where a connexion to the world via the network of roots and fungal filaments lent a spiritual element to death we otherwise would not have known. Aside from recommending her frequently, knowing of her in some on-line circles is rather a mark of being "in the know," kind of like a "cool kids know" kind of thing. She taught me things about places near where I grew up, on the West side of Michigan, by Lake Michigan, including the wreck of the Edmund Fitzgerald in Lake Superior, as well as a sinking that happened in the Chicago River. She is just fascinating, telling us of such random things as the vampire craze of the U.S. New England area well over a century ago, as well as the customs around the world of dealing with what people feared about the dead coming back to life in their actual physical bodies. She is the kind of content provider I could easily see a teacher using in class (with care for young sensitivities) to help kids understand some things they otherwise might not, which could help prepare them, as well as adults, for death of loved ones and pets. Thank you for doing this video. I had no idea some funeral folks hated her like that. Living in Tennessee, that's good to know. Might give me a screening question or two to weed out the haters. Be well!
Caitlin's books facilitated me coping with my parents deaths. Indirectly she aided both my parents to have a good death. She helped me form a more healthy relationship with my own eventual demise as well. She's an amazingly beautiful person and I thank her for her just being her. Edit: because I feel it may be pertinent to te subject matter of the video, I am American.
I live in Texas, am considered a conservative, and a Christian. I am now a New subscriber to TE. I also subscribe to her YT channel, and found TE while I was searching for her somewhat overdue new vid. I prefer having all the facts, and so I support her contributions (but I'm not necessarily going to adopt them all). I was, likewise, pleasantly surprised by your professional and rational presentation, and look forward to watching TE's past, present, and future efforts.
Aussie here! Thank you for sharing this, this is my first video by you! I love Caitlin but it's really cool to have an Australian to turn to for information about death since it's relevant to me and my family.
Welcome! Great to have an Aussie here!
Canadian here. LOVE HER. Support her channel. Bought one of her books & will be continuing to watch her.
She’s trying to help people become more informed & to teach coping with the inevitable for us all.
Ask a Mortician has been one of my favorite channels for years! Thank you for featuring her.... it's how I found your channel and subscribed to it!😊
I wanted to add that I appreciate the way you handled the issue of embalming. Here in the states, it's actually up to the cemetery to accept or refuse a body that has been embalmed. There is no state or federal law that requires a body to be embalmed as long as there is no danger of contamination.
The funeral industry is built and operates on the fact that the vast majority of Americans do not want to personally handle a corpse. They will pay thousands of dollars just to avoid facing the reality of death.