When Gary was at Sheffield United I went into the petrol station at the side of the ground, The Blades players was in the shop buying sweets and chocolates for the coach trip to an away game in the FA Cup against Arsenal......I joined the queue next to him, he started talking to me, we had a chat and a laugh about buying the sweets and stashing them on the coach, he was winding some other players up but included me in the banter....he was like an old mate that I'd not seen for a while, he was so easy going and likeable, was such a great friendly guy, was like I'd known him for ages......will never forget that one moment I met him....RIP Speedo, gone but never forgotten.
Maybe I’m reading into it too much, but as someone who struggles with depression and suicidal thoughts myself I know that look on Gary’s face far too well, there’s a lot of pain in his eyes, rest in paradise speedo ❤️
I totally agree you jack! He looks so so sad like he's about to burst into tears, he looks troubled, for him to have to killself must of been something so so bad! something must of tipped him over the edge after the program, such a shame he couldn't speak up whatever was troubling him, an absolute Tragedy for all involved, god bless his family R.I.P.
Lots of love to you Jack! I really really hope make a full recovery I have huge empathy for you! I suffer the same thing after losing my mum and dad and best friend Marion Sopp who collapsed and had a heart attack in front of me and died. I wish you well!
@@patrickdoyle8784 apparently he used to play for one of Barry Bennell’s academies and many players are convinced he was one of the victims. No proof to show for it but it’s all starting to add up
The best way I can describe depression is to imagine the feeling of drowning or suffocating. It was literally like my mind was experiencing that drowning or suffocating feeling. I lost 5 years and all my friends to depression, but not my life. We keep on going ❤️
Without a doubt, Garry was widely respected, and internationally celebrated, and when he was not internationally celebrated, he found himself being widely respected.
My brother took his life a few years ago, just wished he realised that people, family his kids cared about him more than words. For me suicidal thoughts are temporary anything can change how your feeling in yourself on any given day, just hearing a word of encouragement from a friends or loved one, doing a hobby you enjoy or even hearing a song that makes you think of a happy time. Mental health and dark thoughts can be temporary but taking your life is Permanent. For anyone feeling low or suicidal please reach out to anyone who can comfort you just by listening or being there, because trust me those same people once you’ve gone ahead with taking your life will feel devastated and would have done anything for you to call them in your hour of need. There are always solutions that can prevent suicide I know it’s insidious and can make you feel despair and desperately alone, but the truth is your not you have so many people that would drop everything to save your life or to help you get better in yourself. Please choose to reach out to a loved one or anyone you feel comfortable talking to your soul is worthy of living
Ive suffered from serious depression and I knew people cared/care about me, that alone caused me the most pain. I didn't feel at all worthy. I felt empty, and I felt the love I got from others was built on false premises - that's premises not promises. I felt every moment someone spent trying to love me or support me was a moment of their time wasted, it ate me up. The only way I managed to pull myself through the depression was isolating myself, getting away from well wishers, smashing my phone so nobody could message me, I went off all social media. Since then I've never once attempted suicide. I've kept myself managed and slowly introduced people back into my life at a rate I found manageable. I went from being a severely depressed socialite to now a part reclusive but content person. A lot of people who suffer depression feel overwhelmed, what we live in modern society is not what we're built for, we have to adjust our whole lives and not all of us can do that. For me the best thing I had was therapy because it taught me ways to learn my own body, sometimes we simply don't know why we feel the way do and because of that there seems to be no solution. Knowing you're loved doesn't automatically give you value, you're brother will have known you loved him, he will have loved you. In severe states of depression love becomes pain, and it's a cutting uncontrollable pain, similar to heartbrake. If some even so much as offered me a hug I'd start crying immediately. I had to reel back and recharge, and whenever I feel down I d the same thing again. I don't believe I'll ever go so low again because I have my own method of pulling myself through. My point is, there's nothing to lament and nothing to beat yourself up about, getting through depression is a personal journey and you have to learn yourself somehow during it otherwise it will kill you, as it should've done to me.
I attempted suicide on multiple occasions, the only way I’ve managed to prevent myself from trying again is I played with my ego. I said I had to accomplish something before I can leave, that thing I will likely never accomplish however my ego forces me to not believe that. Other than that my mindset on dying has never changed I want to go as soon as I can and that hasn’t changed since I was 16
it was Gary who elevated Welsh football to where it is today. from laughing stock to top 10 seedings, euro s/f to (the evasive) World cup - it's all thanks to this remarkable and much missed man. rip
@@RFED2O What do you mean? "Don't think so, not at all" It's an absolute fact that Gary Speed put the systems, the new methods and techniques in place which have elevated Wales from once being ranked 117 in the world, to as high as number 8 at one point, and hence qualify for 3 of the last 4 major international tournaments, and get to semi final in Euro 2016.
@@johnjenkins4392 Speed had a massive contribution but so did Brian Flynn and Toshack who started with the processes and procedures behind the scenes. I love Speed, he was ana amazing person and footballer but it wasn't just down to him alone. Nowhere near.
Amazing interview with Dan Walker. Vivid memories of that day. Heard about his death in the pub, before going to the Liberty Stadium to watch Swansea vs Aston Villa. The mood was so low and the game was so unimportant. I left my seat early, walked out of the stadium and was interviewed by a BBC reporter and cameraman. To this day, I have no idea what I said when asked about my feelings about Gary Speeds suicide, because I had watched him the previous night, and his eyes gave it all away. It didn't shock me. I'd seen those eyes so many times in the mirror. Luckily for me, I was able to tell my best friend the way I was feeling, and am still here today to write this. It only takes a couple of important words, and you'd be surprised what true friends are able to do for you, mark my words. To this day, I have my down days, but I always think of Gary Speed, and wonder if he'd still be with us if somebody had seen it in his eyes. RIP Gary Speed.
Gary speed was a class act. You only have to hear the stories of him. Depression and mental health problems never go away. Just have to deal with it best way you can
@@laoch5658is that what you tell burns victims in agonising pain, or cancer patients without any morphine? "Don't focus on yourself, think of your family."! The pain of losing someone is hard, but it is the illness that kills them and made the decision for them. I'm sure he struggled in pain for years thinking of his family. Gary died of an illness which is agony every day. May he rest in peace.
Take care of each other men. Talk if you need to or if you think someone else does. Our family was devastated like most footy fans when Gary died, he was a great guy and his choice must be used as a lesson in seeking help. Take care of each other, this vid broke my heart. RIP Gary.
Gary was a super footballer. I loved watching him play. I always wanted him to be on the team at Newcastle and he was rarely missing. Respect. I wanted to be like Gary speed
RIP Gary speed. Leeds legend but also a legend of Wales and other clubs. So privileged to have watched him grace the field at Elland road. RIP Gary speed
I’ve just seen this interview again. So touching. I’ve experienced depression myself. Tough at times. But it’s true,tough to see signs of what is going on in a person’s brain. You were obviously a good pal to him which Gary must’ve appreciated. Take solice in you had chance to know a lovely guy. Sometimes you just can’t help. Take care.
All of us who know that feeling can see it immediately. As somebody who was incredibly fortunate and survived an attempt to escape the pain, I carry the memory of Gary and all the others like him who didn't make it, always. For all of them, I try to live the happy moments twice as much, and bear the difficult times with a bit more grace, and gratitude for having the chance to still be here at all. If you read this, I hope you can do the same.
We will never know the true extent of Gary's state of mind. He looked so normal, but ask yourself what normal is. Mental health is a disorder that can't be seen. For those who suffer in silence, I 🙏 for you all who need that support. God bless Gary Speed and his family
Nobody wanted to help fix him, you can see here. Nothing in his eyes, he couldn’t “just talk”. It was a pain he likely couldn’t put into words. He was clearly on the verge of death.
The stuff that’s come out about Barry Bennell has made me start to believe he may well have been one of his victims which would’ve been a contributing factor in his state of mind
1st December 2021, watching those I believe saved my life, and my 6 year old son still has a dad. I still have my struggles but I always look back to this interview. RIP Gary
It’s really hard at the start looking at Gary eyes and his mouth knowing something was hurting him. It’s heartbreaking and I know he would be so proud Wales are at the World Cup. This is for you Gary 👍🏾🙏
Wales at this WC have been a disgrace, possibly on par with Qatar. Similar sentiments for any man taking a cowardly exit from his problems. Rumours of his fondness for rear exits was about to be reported in the press no doubt hastened his decision. Life has a way culling the weak from the pack, how would poor, pampered, millionaire Gary have coped with life had he lived on a council estate earning minimum wage? He was among the top 2% in life & chose to abandon his family leaving them infected with grief for the remainder of their days. Words sad, selfish & craven come to mind. We all chorus the same question "Why"?
@@Ytnzy250 I’ll tell you why, money and status doesn’t determine your mental health. You sound like a jealous snob who is angry he never had a reputation or meaning like Gary’s, and now is mocking and blaming him for his mental health state. Have a look in the mirror and wake up. You are clueless, and we’re all asking the same question. Why do senseless people like you splurt out pointless and useless opinions when they haven’t got a clue about the subject or sensitivity. Mong.
I was at the South Lakes Zoo with my kids and grandkids when the tragic news came up on my phone. Shed a tear then and do now. You are remembered fondly Gary, rest easy.
I know im not the only one who struggles . Some days im so busy that i dont notice . But it hits me instantly if i hear music or see something beautiful. Its like a roller coaster of emotion again where i have to remove myself from people incase they see. Or i can feel lost all day and night. And have that look on my face like gary has here. I will be keeping an eye out for that look on others . Keep going if your struggling.. i cant promise you will get better. No one said we have to be perfect. But there is things we havent discovered yet. Much love ❤
Wow - the impact his death and the memory of that last meeting had on Dan Walker is laid bare there. Gary's poor lads look absolutely numb on that pitch. Its a touch watch. RIP Gary Speed
Incredible footage..thank you for uploading..such a beautiful, handsome, hugely talented man..can’t believe it was 11 years ago..terrible tragedy especially for his family..it’s so difficult to spot if someone is going through a tough time, especially with men..it’s so hard to open up..but the more people do, there is definitely hope..everything should be talked out ..no shame in being vulnerable 🙏🙏
Met him a few times when he was at Newcastle, he was a lovely, genuine man, so humble and unassuming. Depression is such an unknown thing, I am familiar with it myself but I don't think anybody understands it.
I often think of Gary, still can’t get my head around why he did it, but as a football fan (Liverpool) I had great respect for him as a footballer and when he took the 🏴 job I was made up from a Englishman with proud Welsh roots.He will always be in my mind. Rest in peace Gary Speed💔
Media were about to out personal stuff in his private life and he didn't want to deal with it so sadly ended his life Typical scum journos, can't keep their nose out of stuff that has got fuck all to do with them
There is a silent panic and sadness behind his eyes. Those that know, know this look all too well. When in that dark hole, nothing anyone can say or do can get you out of it. People say its selfish and it is but to that person who feels like they will never be happy again, to live with the dark thoughts that consume you, to feel like a failure in life (no matter how successful you are), you want it to end. Its desperately sad that this happens to good people but good people feel things deeper than most. My thoughts are with those who struggle every day (me included), please look after these people, ask if they are ok, invite them for coffee or a walk or a drink even but keep an eye on them. Sometimes a hug can work wonders.
I can tell from Gary’s eyes that he looks preoccupied he looks sad and subdued it still is so upsetting how his poor family and friends must feel he for me will always be my hero he’s a Newcastle United legend and as a fan he always gave his all and we all love him
He completely turned around Welsh football I believe he’d still be our manager today if he was still here. Would be every young footballer’s dream to have him as manager
That hundred yard stare of his is heartbreaking. Going through the motions but lost in your own darkness. I know it well. He had so many people he could have turned to. The problem is, when you get to the point of no return, you believe everyone will be better off without you. How wrong he was ❤
i'm an arsenal fan, but not english from East Asia. I was fortunate enough to have watch Gary at Newcastle such a colossus lethal left foot. importantly i felt he was just a gem of a person through his interviews. I have a huge man love for Aaron Ramsey watching Arsene giving Aaron believe and eventually became the lynchpin to Arsenal first trophy in years then went on the captain Wales with Gary's blessing. When I heard the news, although not following Gary closely I still felt so much shocked and hurt. Although I've never been diagnosed with depression I have certainly gone through and only recently started to heal. It has affected me in my pursue of career and relationship. At almost 40, i'm fortunate that i've work my way although been doing alone most times. I wish more men speak out. Gary's eyes were the exact look I project each day, pretending everything ok. I wish one day I could stand at the Principality with Gary's shirt and pay a tribute to him. He demeanour and attitude is something I would like to base myself on. RIP Gary.
12 years on and this still hurts me badly .. I am a huge football fan and Gary Speed was one of those players that you knew was always available, week in week out, game in game out, I always appreciated him being in the football world from Leeds all the way through to his late thirties playing at a very consistent level throughout his career.
Still miss you Gary. Had absolutely no connection to him and am a Liverpool fan, so shouldn't really have liked Gary Speed as much as i did, but showed what type of man he was when he was with us and that his character and personality transcended it all. RIP Gary Speed, gone but never forgotten
Nobody cares who you support. You foitball fans are properly corny & cringey. Always taking the moral highground, thinking you're some sort of spokesman for the club you support. Go away.
As someone who contemplated suicide a decade ago, I see sadness and pain in Gary's eyes in the Football Focus footage. I wish he'd opened up to someone that night, but as Dan said, people can appear relaxed when they've made the decision to end their life. I hope Gary's found peace wherever he is now. Rest in eternal paradise, Gary
Not sure why this popped up but this really got me. Someone with seemingly everything to live for just suddenly thinking he’s had enough. It beggars belief how low he must have felt to take his own life and leave his family. The footage of him in the studio the day before makes it all the more shocking. Please speak to someone if you feel low. Things may feel so different when you get someone else’s perspective.
I actually had the pleasure of meeting Gary Speed when I travelled away with Forest supporters to play the second leg of a playoff game against Swansea City and he came across as a really nice guy. I was absolutely devastated to hear of his passing later that same year to suicide. I always sensed that he was a sensitive guy who appeared cheerful on the outside, but was suffering terrible pain on the inside. It’s so important for us men to talk about our feelings, and there’s absolutely no shame in admitting that you might be struggling with your mental health.
When you wake up each day wishing it was the next. but that day just ends up being the same as the last. Just lost my mam and grandma last month R.I.P mamma and G ❤ life sucks
Suicide is so tragic. Questions with no answers. Excessive analysis of every interaction. The ultimate grief of love with no place to go. No one needs to suffer in silence; it is so good to talk. If the weight of the world is on your shoulders you would be amazed at how many people will want to help lighten the load.
His wife knows the truth and has to live with it! Enough said! RIP Gary Speed for all the pain you went through not realising how much you were so loved by your 2 boys!
Depression is like that one minute you're chatting next your having dark thoughts....RIP Gary I know is said a lot but a shining light that went to soon.....guys learn to talk there's people out there to help you.
Just watched video nearly in tears Im struggling with depression this year but im so glad i got to Andysmanclub every Monday to talk and get things of my chest, best to talk and not bottle things up ❤
You can see the pain in his eyes in the show.. it’s easy to spot when you know what you are looking for. I suffer depression regularly and the best advice I can give is to tell someone how you are feeling. It will help you cope I promise, just talk to someone.. anyone.
Depression ruins lives. All anyone who’s suffering wants is to be seen and heard. Unfortunately most people find that the very people they need disappear when they need them the most. If I can say one thing, please stay around those you know aren’t themselves if if they seem to be isolating away. So many people who’ve experienced depression say they lost all their friends because of it and the saddest part is that’s when they needed them the most 💔
this is a very sad video to watch but if it saves one person's life by reaching out and talking to someone it's all worth it RIP speado from a toffee 💙
There's pain in them eyes. Some of us know exactly how he was feeling. We've been through it or are still going through it. I don't follow football or know anything Gary Speed but what I do know is that I feel his pain. I hope wherever you are Gary. You are at peace. God bless to all and if you're feeling low. If you can, try to reach out to someone. I know it's easier said then done but you're never alone.
This is quite a stark reminder to us all, that , we do not know where we might go, or where we want to go, But it really does not matter, we will go there regardless of expectations, I have seen mental illness,its not like a puzzle you can solve.For it would be great if it was that easy,But its not that simple.Its probably impossible.But we live in hope.
A legend. Even though he never played for a team I supported , he was a player I admired so much. Was so talented and everytime you seen him interviewed , he seemed so humble and likeable.
Having worked in the funeral industry in for almost forty years and have been involved in hundreds of suicide funerals (in some capacity) whether it be arrangements, directing a funeral, chapel viewing and pall bearing, the overwhelming consensus is that ‘no one ever saw it coming’ which is so sad as my philosophy on life is, is that neither the best day or worst day of your life never lasts more than twenty four hours and that their is and contrary to popular belief always has been a community of help for anyone who is struggling and my advice to anyone who is struggling just reach out to someone and ask for help, problems can almost instantly be halved once you pluck up the courage to speak out. God Bless Gary Speed.
I remember watching football focus and he was on there on the Saturday and then I remembering hearing on Talksport on the Sunday that Gary Speed had taken his own life, I couldn't believe it considering that I saw him on live TV the day before and he seemed in good spirits....!!!!
Hindsight is a wonderful thing. I too recognise the sadness and pain you can see behind his eyes, I lived with a mother who suffered from depression for as long as I knew her, manic depression, bi-polar as it is now but to be honest she always just seemed sad. If we're not looking for it we don't necessarily see other people's sadness maybe we all need to look more closely at our friends and be more observant and just be there for each other.
It’s sad to see too often that those who are struggling are generous with others in giving their time and attention when in fact they need it most from others.
Really sad to watch, dont think anyone will be without a tear in their eye, i agree you can see it in his eyes somethings not right, so sad he couldnt talk about it, RIP Speedo, top player and top gentleman.
We have come so far now ,that so many more people open up and talk,and the awareness that is raised nowadays is so much better ,we still have a long way too go ,please just talk too somebody, that's all it may take ,for someone too get the help they need 🙏
You can really see it in his eyes. Was too young too remember the details and the severity of the situation but fuck me. We lost a true legend that day
I read that Gary was so embarrassed (he needn’t have been) and devastated that his private life was going to be exposed, he took his own life. What a terrible situation. He was ruined by the kids football coach and Gary Speed wasn’t the only kid to end their life later on into adulthood. R.I.P. Gary- by ALL accounts just a wonderful man. Such a terrible loss.
@@nigelwalker9052 one of the football coaches at the academy he was at abused some of the boys. It's thought that he was one of them and he took his life thinking his name would be in the paper as a victim. However, we don't know what was going on.
His eyes says it all. Personally I've had two bouts of depression and anxiety that came out of nowhere, it was scary and confusing,so dark. Luckily I slowly resurfaced, it's hard for men to talk about it. Or to even explain it. Keep an eye on your friends and family. And maybe ask are you alright, I mean really alright. I feel for Dan in this video, RIP gary
Don't get me wrong. Suicides are tragic but the amount of pain and grief a lot of people have shown over his death including his friends, just shows how much he truly meant to people. The amount of men you saw crying on T.V that knew him took me back. If any man is struggling out there and is ashamed to speak out, don't be. Seek help, people do care for you.
Sadly, too many people are still unable or unwilling to talk. I've only ever been down bad once thankfully, I bottled it all up, lost all motivation...and it came to a head one day....but thankfully I had the ability to swallow my pride or whatever and talk to my wife. She put me right over the next few days. In my opinion, there's always a way to fix whatever you feel is broken, you just need help to fix it sometimes and people will want to help if you swallow that pride and tell them how low you've gotten. If you have no family or friends, please go to your doctor, call the Samaritans etc. It's never, ever too late. Your life is worth trying to fix. Every life of every good person is worth fixing.
As someone who has tried to do something very desperate many years ago, I think ‘there but for the grace of God’. Such a tragic loss for all who knew and loved him. Suicide leaves an awful legacy ❤
one thing allways stuck with me after watching gary on that episode the first time i watched it , i think it was his hands, constantly tapping and twitching, it always stuck with me, i could tell that wasnt a man at peace RIP Gary Speed.
What a man🙏🙏🙏 fitting tribute on way to ccs just been finished on side of house.RIP GARY SON, YOU STARTED WHATS HAPPENING TODAY IN WELSH FOOTBALL. L.E.G.E.N.D
When Gary was at Sheffield United I went into the petrol station at the side of the ground, The Blades players was in the shop buying sweets and chocolates for the coach trip to an away game in the FA Cup against Arsenal......I joined the queue next to him, he started talking to me, we had a chat and a laugh about buying the sweets and stashing them on the coach, he was winding some other players up but included me in the banter....he was like an old mate that I'd not seen for a while, he was so easy going and likeable, was such a great friendly guy, was like I'd known him for ages......will never forget that one moment I met him....RIP Speedo, gone but never forgotten.
Not true.
@@FC-gq7fb Oh shutup.
Maybe I’m reading into it too much, but as someone who struggles with depression and suicidal thoughts myself I know that look on Gary’s face far too well, there’s a lot of pain in his eyes, rest in paradise speedo ❤️
I totally agree you jack! He looks so so sad like he's about to burst into tears, he looks troubled, for him to have to killself must of been something so so bad! something must of tipped him over the edge after the program, such a shame he couldn't speak up whatever was troubling him, an absolute Tragedy for all involved, god bless his family R.I.P.
Lots of love to you Jack! I really really hope make a full recovery I have huge empathy for you! I suffer the same thing after losing my mum and dad and best friend Marion Sopp who collapsed and had a heart attack in front of me and died. I wish you well!
Same… it’s the eyes… a lot of pain… I know from what I see in the mirror
@@patrickdoyle8784 apparently he used to play for one of Barry Bennell’s academies and many players are convinced he was one of the victims. No proof to show for it but it’s all starting to add up
@@sjfootball1692 Yup, that Dario Gradi needs looking into as well.
R.i.p. Gary Speed.
His eyes in those final hours. The hidden dark. Peace and love to anyone struggling with dark demons,
Shedding a tear even now, over 10 years on.. never met him, but what an absolute legend of the game.. RIP speedo..
Virtue signaller.
@@JamieAsh_ don't you mean paedo.
@@JamieAsh_ Or they mean what they say and felt the need to express it. It's not a crime.
@@JamieAsh_ 🤦♂️
I felt so numb when I heard
11 yrs on and still upsets me. We miss him dearly 🏴 ❤ ripspeedo
The best way I can describe depression is to imagine the feeling of drowning or suffocating. It was literally like my mind was experiencing that drowning or suffocating feeling. I lost 5 years and all my friends to depression, but not my life. We keep on going ❤️
It feels to me like I’m carrying huge weights on my shoulders. The feeling of being weighed down.😞
This is a tremendous tribute to a man who was clearly deeply loved and respected.
Yes, a wonderful tribute.
Without a doubt, Garry was widely respected, and internationally celebrated, and when he was not internationally celebrated, he found himself being widely respected.
My brother took his life a few years ago, just wished he realised that people, family his kids cared about him more than words. For me suicidal thoughts are temporary anything can change how your feeling in yourself on any given day, just hearing a word of encouragement from a friends or loved one, doing a hobby you enjoy or even hearing a song that makes you think of a happy time. Mental health and dark thoughts can be temporary but taking your life is Permanent. For anyone feeling low or suicidal please reach out to anyone who can comfort you just by listening or being there, because trust me those same people once you’ve gone ahead with taking your life will feel devastated and would have done anything for you to call them in your hour of need. There are always solutions that can prevent suicide I know it’s insidious and can make you feel despair and desperately alone, but the truth is your not you have so many people that would drop everything to save your life or to help you get better in yourself. Please choose to reach out to a loved one or anyone you feel comfortable talking to your soul is worthy of living
i am of the opinion that almost all people suffer from mental health issues...... it's just some can get through them and some can't.....
Sorry for your loss brother
Ive suffered from serious depression and I knew people cared/care about me, that alone caused me the most pain. I didn't feel at all worthy. I felt empty, and I felt the love I got from others was built on false premises - that's premises not promises. I felt every moment someone spent trying to love me or support me was a moment of their time wasted, it ate me up. The only way I managed to pull myself through the depression was isolating myself, getting away from well wishers, smashing my phone so nobody could message me, I went off all social media. Since then I've never once attempted suicide. I've kept myself managed and slowly introduced people back into my life at a rate I found manageable. I went from being a severely depressed socialite to now a part reclusive but content person.
A lot of people who suffer depression feel overwhelmed, what we live in modern society is not what we're built for, we have to adjust our whole lives and not all of us can do that. For me the best thing I had was therapy because it taught me ways to learn my own body, sometimes we simply don't know why we feel the way do and because of that there seems to be no solution. Knowing you're loved doesn't automatically give you value, you're brother will have known you loved him, he will have loved you. In severe states of depression love becomes pain, and it's a cutting uncontrollable pain, similar to heartbrake. If some even so much as offered me a hug I'd start crying immediately. I had to reel back and recharge, and whenever I feel down I d the same thing again. I don't believe I'll ever go so low again because I have my own method of pulling myself through. My point is, there's nothing to lament and nothing to beat yourself up about, getting through depression is a personal journey and you have to learn yourself somehow during it otherwise it will kill you, as it should've done to me.
@@upon-fe2720 great post
I attempted suicide on multiple occasions, the only way I’ve managed to prevent myself from trying again is I played with my ego. I said I had to accomplish something before I can leave, that thing I will likely never accomplish however my ego forces me to not believe that. Other than that my mindset on dying has never changed I want to go as soon as I can and that hasn’t changed since I was 16
Ten years went by so quickly... What I loved most of all about Gary is that he was always available, hard working and prolific. Still saddens hugely.
The epitome of professional.
it was Gary who elevated Welsh football to where it is today. from laughing stock to top 10 seedings, euro s/f to (the evasive) World cup - it's all thanks to this remarkable and much missed man. rip
No don't think so not at all
@@RFED2O What do you mean? "Don't think so, not at all" It's an absolute fact that Gary Speed put the systems, the new methods and techniques in place which have elevated Wales from once being ranked 117 in the world, to as high as number 8 at one point, and hence qualify for 3 of the last 4 major international tournaments, and get to semi final in Euro 2016.
@@johnjenkins4392 Speed had a massive contribution but so did Brian Flynn and Toshack who started with the processes and procedures behind the scenes.
I love Speed, he was ana amazing person and footballer but it wasn't just down to him alone. Nowhere near.
What, coming last in the group stages of the 2022 World cup, fuck me, even Martin Sheen with is gay Welsh Dragon rant, could not get them going.
@@donaldsinden934keep it classy as ever Saes 👍
Amazing interview with Dan Walker. Vivid memories of that day. Heard about his death in the pub, before going to the Liberty Stadium to watch Swansea vs Aston Villa. The mood was so low and the game was so unimportant. I left my seat early, walked out of the stadium and was interviewed by a BBC reporter and cameraman. To this day, I have no idea what I said when asked about my feelings about Gary Speeds suicide, because I had watched him the previous night, and his eyes gave it all away. It didn't shock me. I'd seen those eyes so many times in the mirror. Luckily for me, I was able to tell my best friend the way I was feeling, and am still here today to write this. It only takes a couple of important words, and you'd be surprised what true friends are able to do for you, mark my words. To this day, I have my down days, but I always think of Gary Speed, and wonder if he'd still be with us if somebody had seen it in his eyes. RIP Gary Speed.
Gary speed was a class act. You only have to hear the stories of him. Depression and mental health problems never go away. Just have to deal with it best way you can
Hope you are well
Heart Breaking, Gary was an amazing talent and i loved watching him for Leeds and Newcastle. Legend.
You can see it in his eyes during close-up shots. There was a lot of pain and sadness in those eyes.
he should have focused on his family and not himself
@@laoch5658 Fucking narrow minded view you p.o.s
@@laoch5658you should focus on yourself and what is missing in your life to the point where you have to be an online edge lord.
@@laoch5658is that what you tell burns victims in agonising pain, or cancer patients without any morphine? "Don't focus on yourself, think of your family."! The pain of losing someone is hard, but it is the illness that kills them and made the decision for them. I'm sure he struggled in pain for years thinking of his family. Gary died of an illness which is agony every day. May he rest in peace.
@@laoch5658Moron.
Take care of each other men. Talk if you need to or if you think someone else does. Our family was devastated like most footy fans when Gary died, he was a great guy and his choice must be used as a lesson in seeking help. Take care of each other, this vid broke my heart. RIP Gary.
Getting that phone call hearing that a loved one has taken their own life, is one that changes your life forever.
I know.
Gary was a super footballer. I loved watching him play. I always wanted him to be on the team at Newcastle and he was rarely missing. Respect. I wanted to be like Gary speed
RIP Gary speed. Leeds legend but also a legend of Wales and other clubs. So privileged to have watched him grace the field at Elland road. RIP Gary speed
I’ve just seen this interview again. So touching. I’ve experienced depression myself. Tough at times. But it’s true,tough to see signs of what is going on in a person’s brain. You were obviously a good pal to him which Gary must’ve appreciated. Take solice in you had chance to know a lovely guy. Sometimes you just can’t help. Take care.
All of us who know that feeling can see it immediately. As somebody who was incredibly fortunate and survived an attempt to escape the pain, I carry the memory of Gary and all the others like him who didn't make it, always. For all of them, I try to live the happy moments twice as much, and bear the difficult times with a bit more grace, and gratitude for having the chance to still be here at all. If you read this, I hope you can do the same.
Well said. 👏🏼😊
We will never know the true extent of Gary's state of mind. He looked so normal, but ask yourself what normal is. Mental health is a disorder that can't be seen. For those who suffer in silence, I 🙏 for you all who need that support. God bless Gary Speed and his family
Nobody wanted to help fix him, you can see here. Nothing in his eyes, he couldn’t “just talk”. It was a pain he likely couldn’t put into words. He was clearly on the verge of death.
The stuff that’s come out about Barry Bennell has made me start to believe he may well have been one of his victims which would’ve been a contributing factor in his state of mind
Gary Speed. A God amongst men.
his eyes speak words , he was having a panick attack here . iv had many and he was try to focus on beating it
@@gumpysee3644 there's absolutely no way you can tell he was having a panic attack in this video other than projection
1st December 2021, watching those I believe saved my life, and my 6 year old son still has a dad. I still have my struggles but I always look back to this interview. RIP Gary
Watching this 11 years on…still tears in my eyes…RIP Gary ❤
So sad 😞
Who’s that hanging from the ceiling who’s that behind the garage door
@@laytonsampson7644 You need help! Really weird comment mate.
@@simoncox8793 shh I don’t carex
@@laytonsampson7644 Get some help please
Gary Speed RIP, much love always from here in North Wales.
Magnificent player and manager. Sadly missed. Rest in peace Speedo. Leeds United Legend. You will be remembered forever 💙🤍💛 MOT
It’s really hard at the start looking at Gary eyes and his mouth knowing something was hurting him. It’s heartbreaking and I know he would be so proud Wales are at the World Cup. This is for you Gary 👍🏾🙏
I agree mate. Easy to say in hindsight but those eyes say alot
Wales at this WC have been a disgrace, possibly on par with Qatar.
Similar sentiments for any man taking a cowardly exit from his problems.
Rumours of his fondness for rear exits was about to be reported in the press no doubt hastened his decision.
Life has a way culling the weak from the pack, how would poor, pampered, millionaire Gary have coped with life had he lived on a council estate earning minimum wage?
He was among the top 2% in life & chose to abandon his family leaving them infected with grief for the remainder of their days.
Words sad, selfish & craven come to mind.
We all chorus the same question "Why"?
@@Ytnzy250 absolute tosser comes to mind regarding you
@@Ytnzy250 Shut up you evil emotionless scumbag. Hope you take the same ticket out
@@Ytnzy250 I’ll tell you why, money and status doesn’t determine your mental health. You sound like a jealous snob who is angry he never had a reputation or meaning like Gary’s, and now is mocking and blaming him for his mental health state. Have a look in the mirror and wake up. You are clueless, and we’re all asking the same question. Why do senseless people like you splurt out pointless and useless opinions when they haven’t got a clue about the subject or sensitivity. Mong.
Such a genuine nice man, so very sad to hear of his passing many years ago. Lost my daughter to suicide, twenty years on ,the pain never ends.😢
❤❤❤
He had everything he could possibly want but obviously there was something that nobody seem to know about only Gary knew so sad RIP Gary
An absolute honour to have him played for my team. Love and miss you Gary.
Still very sad , he was a great man that was a great tribute so bloody sad R.I.P Gary .
I was at the South Lakes Zoo with my kids and grandkids when the tragic news came up on my phone. Shed a tear then and do now. You are remembered fondly Gary, rest easy.
Steady on, he’s not your family.
I know im not the only one who struggles . Some days im so busy that i dont notice . But it hits me instantly if i hear music or see something beautiful. Its like a roller coaster of emotion again where i have to remove myself from people incase they see. Or i can feel lost all day and night. And have that look on my face like gary has here. I will be keeping an eye out for that look on others . Keep going if your struggling.. i cant promise you will get better. No one said we have to be perfect. But there is things we havent discovered yet. Much love ❤
❤️❤️❤️
Wow - the impact his death and the memory of that last meeting had on Dan Walker is laid bare there. Gary's poor lads look absolutely numb on that pitch. Its a touch watch. RIP Gary Speed
RIP Gary Speed you have left behind a legacy great player sadly missed.
Incredible footage..thank you for uploading..such a beautiful, handsome, hugely talented man..can’t believe it was 11 years ago..terrible tragedy especially for his family..it’s so difficult to spot if someone is going through a tough time, especially with men..it’s so hard to open up..but the more people do, there is definitely hope..everything should be talked out ..no shame in being vulnerable 🙏🙏
Met him a few times when he was at Newcastle, he was a lovely, genuine man, so humble and unassuming. Depression is such an unknown thing, I am familiar with it myself but I don't think anybody understands it.
I often think of Gary, still can’t get my head around why he did it, but as a football fan (Liverpool) I had great respect for him as a footballer and when he took the 🏴 job I was made up from a Englishman with proud Welsh roots.He will always be in my mind. Rest in peace Gary Speed💔
Media were about to out personal stuff in his private life and he didn't want to deal with it so sadly ended his life
Typical scum journos, can't keep their nose out of stuff that has got fuck all to do with them
Unless you suffer from depression you cant understand how crippling it is.
I think even when you have depression you dont realise how crippling it is.
Maybe you should grow a spine?
@@richardmullan6158 wanker
@@richardmullan6158 i think you have some issues you need to sought out in your life
@@richardmullan6158 if you realised how incredibly ironic this is you'd understand
It's just heartbreaking he must have been going through so much I can't begin to understand rest in peace ❤
There is a silent panic and sadness behind his eyes. Those that know, know this look all too well. When in that dark hole, nothing anyone can say or do can get you out of it. People say its selfish and it is but to that person who feels like they will never be happy again, to live with the dark thoughts that consume you, to feel like a failure in life (no matter how successful you are), you want it to end. Its desperately sad that this happens to good people but good people feel things deeper than most. My thoughts are with those who struggle every day (me included), please look after these people, ask if they are ok, invite them for coffee or a walk or a drink even but keep an eye on them. Sometimes a hug can work wonders.
In this day and age, can't hug people ( accused of assault)... can't ask people to go for a coffee ( harassment).... not the same as years ago mate.
@@stuartdove8814 100% agree. And it sucks.
I can tell from Gary’s eyes that he looks preoccupied he looks sad and subdued it still is so upsetting how his poor family and friends must feel he for me will always be my hero he’s a Newcastle United legend and as a fan he always gave his all and we all love him
Yeah. His voice and body language seems so normal but his eyes...
He looks completely normal
I’d seen that look before. It was the same one I taught myself.
Miss him hugely.......lovely bloke. Terrific player.
He completely turned around Welsh football I believe he’d still be our manager today if he was still here. Would be every young footballer’s dream to have him as manager
Yeah, he was actually doing an amazing job with the Welsh Team. I think people forget that.
That hundred yard stare of his is heartbreaking. Going through the motions but lost in your own darkness. I know it well. He had so many people he could have turned to. The problem is, when you get to the point of no return, you believe everyone will be better off without you. How wrong he was ❤
God sets free from all confusion and pain, read matthew 17:21
So so sad. Can still remember this so clearly in the news. What a fantastic player and bloke
i'm an arsenal fan, but not english from East Asia. I was fortunate enough to have watch Gary at Newcastle such a colossus lethal left foot. importantly i felt he was just a gem of a person through his interviews. I have a huge man love for Aaron Ramsey watching Arsene giving Aaron believe and eventually became the lynchpin to Arsenal first trophy in years then went on the captain Wales with Gary's blessing. When I heard the news, although not following Gary closely I still felt so much shocked and hurt. Although I've never been diagnosed with depression I have certainly gone through and only recently started to heal. It has affected me in my pursue of career and relationship. At almost 40, i'm fortunate that i've work my way although been doing alone most times. I wish more men speak out. Gary's eyes were the exact look I project each day, pretending everything ok. I wish one day I could stand at the Principality with Gary's shirt and pay a tribute to him. He demeanour and attitude is something I would like to base myself on. RIP Gary.
Played for bolton in his later years was loved by everyone at Bolton
12 years on and this still hurts me badly ..
I am a huge football fan and Gary Speed was one of those players that you knew was always available, week in week out, game in game out, I always appreciated him being in the football world from Leeds all the way through to his late thirties playing at a very consistent level throughout his career.
Brought a tear to my eye, what a shame! Rip Gary
Still miss you Gary. Had absolutely no connection to him and am a Liverpool fan, so shouldn't really have liked Gary Speed as much as i did, but showed what type of man he was when he was with us and that his character and personality transcended it all.
RIP Gary Speed, gone but never forgotten
Nobody cares who you support. You foitball fans are properly corny & cringey. Always taking the moral highground, thinking you're some sort of spokesman for the club you support. Go away.
@@JamieAsh_ Cheers J👍
The memory of Gary Speed will long live on. RIP young man.
As someone who contemplated suicide a decade ago, I see sadness and pain in Gary's eyes in the Football Focus footage. I wish he'd opened up to someone that night, but as Dan said, people can appear relaxed when they've made the decision to end their life. I hope Gary's found peace wherever he is now. Rest in eternal paradise, Gary
RIP Gary Speed (September 8, 1969 - November 27, 2011), aged 42
You will be remembered as a legend.
Not sure why this popped up but this really got me.
Someone with seemingly everything to live for just suddenly thinking he’s had enough. It beggars belief how low he must have felt to take his own life and leave his family.
The footage of him in the studio the day before makes it all the more shocking.
Please speak to someone if you feel low. Things may feel so different when you get someone else’s perspective.
I actually had the pleasure of meeting Gary Speed when I travelled away with Forest supporters to play the second leg of a playoff game against Swansea City and he came across as a really nice guy. I was absolutely devastated to hear of his passing later that same year to suicide. I always sensed that he was a sensitive guy who appeared cheerful on the outside, but was suffering terrible pain on the inside. It’s so important for us men to talk about our feelings, and there’s absolutely no shame in admitting that you might be struggling with your mental health.
It's hard to talk about getting graped by a football nonce ring, however.
Theres nothing that Gentleman or anyone could of doing man was struggling massivly internally
God bless Gary Speed.
One of the truly good and great ones
Speedo 💗
When you wake up each day wishing it was the next. but that day just ends up being the same as the last. Just lost my mam and grandma last month R.I.P mamma and G ❤ life sucks
A lovely tribute, Dan. Rest in peace, Speedy x
Suicide is so tragic. Questions with no answers. Excessive analysis of every interaction. The ultimate grief of love with no place to go. No one needs to suffer in silence; it is so good to talk. If the weight of the world is on your shoulders you would be amazed at how many people will want to help lighten the load.
His wife knows the truth and has to live with it! Enough said! RIP Gary Speed for all the pain you went through not realising how much you were so loved by your 2 boys!
Rip Gary. Grew up watching you ❤
Depression is like that one minute you're chatting next your having dark thoughts....RIP Gary I know is said a lot but a shining light that went to soon.....guys learn to talk there's people out there to help you.
You could see it in his eyes he was there but he wasn't there. RIP
You’re a nice guy Dan. He would be so proud.
Just watched video nearly in tears Im struggling with depression this year but im so glad i got to Andysmanclub every Monday to talk and get things of my chest, best to talk and not bottle things up ❤
Keep going there and talking mate!
You can see the pain in his eyes in the show.. it’s easy to spot when you know what you are looking for. I suffer depression regularly and the best advice I can give is to tell someone how you are feeling. It will help you cope I promise, just talk to someone.. anyone.
What a player and manager. I hope his boys are able to look after themselves and each other.
It’s crazy seeing him there and one day later he’s gone. Such a tremendous loss
This was on the day he done it.
@@garethroblynit was the day after
Depression ruins lives. All anyone who’s suffering wants is to be seen and heard. Unfortunately most people find that the very people they need disappear when they need them the most. If I can say one thing, please stay around those you know aren’t themselves if if they seem to be isolating away. So many people who’ve experienced depression say they lost all their friends because of it and the saddest part is that’s when they needed them the most 💔
A genuinely excellent player and clearly a decent guy. Was always MOM for every team he played for. I’m going to cry now….
this is a very sad video to watch but if it saves one person's life by reaching out and talking to someone it's all worth it RIP speado from a toffee 💙
It’s in his eyes, god bless the soul of this good man
Prick thing to do to your family
@@juicybear7696 until youve had depression youll never understand
There's pain in them eyes. Some of us know exactly how he was feeling. We've been through it or are still going through it. I don't follow football or know anything Gary Speed but what I do know is that I feel his pain. I hope wherever you are Gary. You are at peace. God bless to all and if you're feeling low. If you can, try to reach out to someone. I know it's easier said then done but you're never alone.
This is quite a stark reminder to us all, that , we do not know where we might go, or where we want to go, But it really does not matter, we will go there regardless of expectations, I have seen mental illness,its not like a puzzle you can solve.For it would be great if it was that easy,But its not that simple.Its probably impossible.But we live in hope.
The pain Gary was going threw must have must have been unbearable. What a footballer . Gone but not for gotten R.I.P 🙏
A legend. Even though he never played for a team I supported , he was a player I admired so much. Was so talented and everytime you seen him interviewed , he seemed so humble and likeable.
Having worked in the funeral industry in for almost forty years and have been involved in hundreds of suicide funerals (in some capacity) whether it be arrangements, directing a funeral, chapel viewing and pall bearing, the overwhelming consensus is that ‘no one ever saw it coming’ which is so sad as my philosophy on life is, is that neither the best day or worst day of your life never lasts more than twenty four hours and that their is and contrary to popular belief always has been a community of help for anyone who is struggling and my advice to anyone who is struggling just reach out to someone and ask for help, problems can almost instantly be halved once you pluck up the courage to speak out. God Bless Gary Speed.
I remember watching football focus and he was on there on the Saturday and then I remembering hearing on Talksport on the Sunday that Gary Speed had taken his own life, I couldn't believe it considering that I saw him on live TV the day before and he seemed in good spirits....!!!!
Hindsight is a wonderful thing. I too recognise the sadness and pain you can see behind his eyes, I lived with a mother who suffered from depression for as long as I knew her, manic depression, bi-polar as it is now but to be honest she always just seemed sad. If we're not looking for it we don't necessarily see other people's sadness maybe we all need to look more closely at our friends and be more observant and just be there for each other.
Such a tragedy. Thoughts and prayers to anyone who has suffered loss of their own.
Never forget that day🕯️🏴❤️💛💚
RIP Speedo.. Always in our thoughts an hearts ❤️🏴2022
It’s sad to see too often that those who are struggling are generous with others in giving their time and attention when in fact they need it most from others.
Really sad to watch, dont think anyone will be without a tear in their eye, i agree you can see it in his eyes somethings not right, so sad he couldnt talk about it, RIP Speedo, top player and top gentleman.
So tragic, suffering with anxiety myself since my Dad passed away, i often see the pain in people's faces, may Gary rest in peace.
We have come so far now ,that so many more people open up and talk,and the awareness that is raised nowadays is so much better ,we still have a long way too go ,please just talk too somebody, that's all it may take ,for someone too get the help they need 🙏
You can really see it in his eyes. Was too young too remember the details and the severity of the situation but fuck me. We lost a true legend that day
I read that Gary was so embarrassed (he needn’t have been) and devastated that his private life was going to be exposed, he took his own life.
What a terrible situation. He was ruined by the kids football coach and Gary Speed wasn’t the only kid to end their life later on into adulthood.
R.I.P. Gary- by ALL accounts just a wonderful man. Such a terrible loss.
This is true.
What had happened in his private life?
Wat was going on?
@@nigelwalker9052 Barry Bennell I believe.
@@nigelwalker9052 one of the football coaches at the academy he was at abused some of the boys. It's thought that he was one of them and he took his life thinking his name would be in the paper as a victim. However, we don't know what was going on.
Fantastic man
Great midfielder
Sorely missed
so sad. Thanks for putting this back into the media for awareness
If you've got kids you forfeit the luxury of quitting. Its the only reason im still here
Funny word luxury in this context.I understand what you mean about the kids but no way was that an 'easy' way out
people commenting how normal and okay he appears but if you've ever had depression you will be able to see it in his eyes
Exactly m8 how could nobody notice this?
His eyes says it all. Personally I've had two bouts of depression and anxiety that came out of nowhere, it was scary and confusing,so dark. Luckily I slowly resurfaced, it's hard for men to talk about it. Or to even explain it. Keep an eye on your friends and family. And maybe ask are you alright, I mean really alright. I feel for Dan in this video, RIP gary
Loved Gary. Such an underrated player
Don't get me wrong. Suicides are tragic but the amount of pain and grief a lot of people have shown over his death including his friends, just shows how much he truly meant to people. The amount of men you saw crying on T.V that knew him took me back. If any man is struggling out there and is ashamed to speak out, don't be. Seek help, people do care for you.
Sadly, too many people are still unable or unwilling to talk. I've only ever been down bad once thankfully, I bottled it all up, lost all motivation...and it came to a head one day....but thankfully I had the ability to swallow my pride or whatever and talk to my wife. She put me right over the next few days. In my opinion, there's always a way to fix whatever you feel is broken, you just need help to fix it sometimes and people will want to help if you swallow that pride and tell them how low you've gotten. If you have no family or friends, please go to your doctor, call the Samaritans etc. It's never, ever too late. Your life is worth trying to fix. Every life of every good person is worth fixing.
As someone who has tried to do something very desperate many years ago, I think ‘there but for the grace of God’.
Such a tragic loss for all who knew and loved him. Suicide leaves an awful legacy ❤
Know that feeling but when I'm like that my mind says end it all but my heart says stay alive.
one thing allways stuck with me after watching gary on that episode the first time i watched it , i think it was his hands, constantly tapping and twitching, it always stuck with me, i could tell that wasnt a man at peace RIP Gary Speed.
God bless you Gary Speed 🏴 Always Be with us .
What a man🙏🙏🙏 fitting tribute on way to ccs just been finished on side of house.RIP GARY SON, YOU STARTED WHATS HAPPENING TODAY IN WELSH FOOTBALL. L.E.G.E.N.D