What to do when daytime activities feel more difficult & less enjoyable because of chronic insomnia
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 19 ส.ค. 2024
- If we are able to recognize that how we sleep doesn’t completely dictate the quality of our day, how we live our life, or what we are able to do, we might put less pressure on ourselves to sleep at night - and this helps create better conditions for sleep.
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For many people, doing things they enjoy - even after difficult nights - leads to some improvement in the quality of the day and daytime mood. It is possible, though, to find that our experience of activities - activities that once brought us a lot of joy and enrichment - changes after difficult nights. These activities might feel more difficult or less enjoyable.
Often, that’s down to our wandering mind.
Our brains are hard-wired to wander and to multitask but the problem is, the brain is not very good at focusing on more than one thing at a time! When our brain wanders, we can find it hard to concentrate on anything! When we try to focus on just one thing, the mind constantly drifts - and when we have insomnia it usually drifts to sleep-related thoughts and worries and ongoing monitoring for the effects of a difficult night or a run of difficult nights.
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It’s this drifting and our natural tendency to fight or suppress that drifting and those sleep-related thoughts that can make it harder for us to focus on enjoyable activities - and this can make them feel less enriching and enjoyable and it can create and maintain a sense of brain fog and fatigue.
The good news, though, is that we can "rewire" the brain to focus on what we are doing at the present moment by repeatedly recognizing when it has drifted, and bringing it back to the present moment without judgement.
The aim here is not to feel great all the time (that’s impossible!). It’s not to fight sleep-related thoughts or to avoid them. And it is certainly not to stop the mind from wandering!
Instead, the goal is simply to notice when the mind wanders, to recognize that it has wandered (which is OK!), and to gently guide it back to what you are doing at the present moment. At first, you might find yourself doing this dozens of times a minute! With practice, though, it gets a lot easier to notice the mind drifting, to bring it back, and to remain more focused on doing whatever activity is important to you.
Perhaps the most important thing to bear in mind, though, is that even if doing activities that once brought you more joy doesn’t feel quite as good after difficult nights of sleep, that’s OK! It’s OK because it’s impossible to feel good all the time - and it’s OK because you are still pursuing activities that align with your values and you are still doing things that are important to you and that add meaning, enrichment, and value to your life.
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My name is Martin Reed and I am the founder of Insomnia Coach®. I offer sleep coaching services that give people with insomnia all the skills and support they need to enjoy better sleep for the rest of their lives. I also offer a free two-week sleep training course for people with insomnia at insomniacoach....
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All content found on the Insomnia Coach TH-cam channel is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
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All content found on the Insomnia Coach TH-cam channel is provided for informational and educational purposes only. It is not medical advice and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease, disorder, or medical condition. It should never replace any advice given to you by your physician or any other licensed healthcare provider. Insomnia Coach LLC offers coaching services only and does not provide therapy, counseling, medical advice, or medical treatment. All content is provided “as is” and without warranties, either express or implied.
Hi Martin I was wondering if you had any thoughts on covidsomnia... I've struggled with insomnia since February and am barely getting 4 hrs sleep a night and have work to go to aswell
@@Sleepywhispers79 At the current time, it seems as though COVID is one of the millions/billions of things that can trigger some sleep disruption. There's no evidence, as yet, to suggest that COVID itself is to blame for ongoing sleep disruption, so my current thinking is that in order to improve sleep it's a case of tackling the sleep-related thoughts and behaviors that perpetuate sleep disruption, just like in all other cases of chronic insomnia!
@@InsomniaCoach
Thanks for replying... I have no problems falling asleep it's the wakening up during the night and staying awake
@@Sleepywhispers79 That is one of the common symptoms of insomnia!
Wow, there's something so reassuring and calming about his contents. It's like no matter how bad your insomnia is, there's always hope. You're the GOAT, man. God bless.
Simply the best insomnia resource online
That means a lot! Thank you!
I cannot vouch for this enough. Martin, your content is so helpful. I had a breakthrough with my insomnia when I did 2 things: Continued my day to day activities as best I could and stopped the EFFORTS to sleep (supplements, routines, etc.)
You are so right. The closer you live your life to what it was like BEFORE insomnia, the better. It's so hard first thing in the morning after a bad night's sleep but after eating, coffee and taking vitamins, I get the energy I need to move on with my day.
Thank you!
Thank you so much for sharing your experience! It's often harder to do things that matter after difficult nights and in the presence of all the difficult thoughts and feelings that can come with them - but it can be a more workable approach compared to withdrawing from life.
What supplements did you take for that day energy?
@@samdiab4193 Vitamin B Stress Complex. A MUST if you have anxiety and lack sleep. Helps your nervous system.
I fight with severe insomnia for so many years and I lost the happiness of doing things, it’s just like I’m forced to do it
If you are doing activities that are aligned with your personal values, then you are still doing things that move you toward the kind of life you want to live - way to go, Amanda!
Hi, sorry for my English. I suffered from chronic insomnia since 2016 which is triggered from a physical injury while I was in middle school. Once I realized that poor sleep has negatively affect my sports and academic performance the next day, I became so fixated to sleep which has led to prolonged insomnia. Now I am in college, I found very difficult to study and concentrate if I had poor sleep and I am still fixated on sleep. If I have something important the next day, or if I have morning classes, these makes me very alert in the night as I am trying to get "quality sleep" so I can function well the next day, but these behaviors automatically fail and I am forced to take sleeping pills and I will wake up 2 hours before the desired waking time. I really do have a control issue around sleep. And I really want to break this pattern.
I only slept 4 hours last night (with waking up). During the day I feel exhausted, I have tachycardia and shallow breathing, dizziness, headache. I worry that so little sleep will lead to some physical illness. It’s hard for me to function during the day and I’m already losing hope that this will ever stop 😐
Those nights of less sleep are difficult and challenging. No doubt about it. With that in mind, it's important to practice some self-compassion because what you are going through is hard. No matter how difficult our nights might be, we ALWAYS have control over our behaviors and so there are always some actions we can take (no matter how small) that move us toward the kind of life we want to live. The alternative is to give up, do nothing, and move away from the kind of life we want to live.
@@InsomniaCoach thank you so much for this channel and all you do ❤️ Right now I don't have other options but to get back on my pills and try slowly to follow CBT rules and eventually cut pills later. Hello from Bosnia and Herzegovina, keep up the good work 🌹 I don't have anyone here who can help me with CBT therapy (since ten I have panic attacks and agoraphobia and always was brave and strong but with this horrible insomnia that last for seven months now for the first time I feel defeated and losing hope that will be better one day
I just wanted to say that I appreciate this comment. I get similar physical symptoms, and because of my anxiety I start to make up stories about these symptoms. Knowing that others have them helps me calm some of that down.
@@nanlittle8384 I have them too and managed to sleep a bit better with Martin's tips. Hope you are doing OK.
I have almost the same problems you are describing. It is infuriating and I often wake up feeling more exhausted than I did before going to bed. I was having tacky cardia, night mares, sweating, I am now taking magnesium and a thiamine/benfotamine before bed. Seems help relax me at bedtime and feel sleepy. I also suffer from nasal congestion that is side dependent and, of course, I can only sleep on my side. I also have autoimmune and carpal tunnel related pain which aggravates sleeping as well. Sooooooo .. after months and months of this and the doctor/insurance merry-go-round of worthlessness (just drives a person insane!). Anyway, at this point this is what I do: I finally got them to give me high blood pressure meds and that helped a lot ( my blood pressure was really high and the doctors just kept blowing me off ?!?!). Also got on an injectable autoimmune medication which in one month has rocked my world! The oral form did not work. Only took 5 years to get the injectable perscribed! Now after 4 weeks of injections they told me the manufactures are temporarily NOT MAKING IT SO I CANNOT GET ANY RIGHT NOW ... Great!!! 🤬. For my nasal congestion sleep apnea I got desperate and tried a few squirts of Cepacal sore throat spray way back in my throat right before bed. Makes it so I can breath and not gag all night and wake up having dreams about drowning. Just tried that a few nights ago out of desperation and it worked pretty well. I also soak in a hot bath, take a shower or sit in the hottub before bed some nights and that really helps me. Someone told me you have to be your own advocate and, I guess, your own doctor as well! Crazy! Not to bore you or give you my entire health history, but just saying try different things and see what you can figure out what helps you cuz in this day and age that is what we are left with. Being exhaust makes it so hard to even get out of bed ... totally get it! Still struggling here as well!
I'm suffering from extreme insomnia, for over a year This week I haven't slept 3 nights at all, and the other nights barely. I really want to go to an activity today, but I'm so tired and emotional and I have had so many bad experiences in social settings with too little sleep. I feel ugly, dirty and I get bad at social activities. I value sleep way too much, I tried to let that value go, but I don't seem to be able to.
Sorry to hear about your struggles with sleep. Doing "good stuff" after difficult nights can be very challenging. Ultimately, I think we have two choices after difficult nights - we can do things that help us move toward the kind of life we want to live, or we can do things that move us away from the kind of life we want to live. Usually, our brain screams at us to pursue the second option - but that rarely helps us feel any better.
I slept for 10 hours straight after going through all your videos ..you are an angel i will want you to be on patreon so that i can support you ...your sleep drive always wins has reassured me i only wished i knew you earlier so that i would not have suffered this from 2016 ...i m so much happy i found you i have done so much research that i can write a book on sleep but everyone tells how important is sleep without providing any solutions which makes our life even more difficult than you martin ....you saved me ..
Thank you so much for your kinds words - I am so happy to hear how well you are doing, and that's entirely down to your own efforts to explore how you think about sleep and to implement some new habits! The best way you can support my work is to share it with others!
Hello can I have your contact plz bro
Hy@chandel_rahputbundelkhand
Please advise what you implemented that made you sleep
Your videos are so reassuring. I’ve found that if I don’t carry on with my daily routines, I get depressed very quickly. My motto is “just keep moving”. It’s sooo hard sometimes, but it just makes everything so much worse if I don’t. Life can still be good even if you haven’t slept in a while.
Thanks for sharing, Marissa! It sure can be hard to continue doing things that matter when we're dealing with all this difficult stuff - but the only possible alternative is to do less of what matters. To withdraw from life. And that doesn't usually make things any better.
Me too. It is tough to do the mornings and even the rest of the day is a bit hard after so little sleep but I do feel ok enough to do my tasks. It's been an ongoing process for me! And I feel much hope commenting and reading comments from others! I keep plugging away and it gets better❤
Thanks for the advice Insomnia Coach! Useful videos, you have a great approach, I appreciate it.
I do my best, but when I've had less than 5 hours it's difficult to perform some activities, and depression is worse with insomnia. I will try harder to maintain normal activities.
Thank you for your encouraging and empowering messages in this video. Moving on with my daily activities with gratitude is something I will always focus on. 😀☮️
Great stuff! Thanks for sharing!
I’ve had on and off bouts of insomnia for years (currently going through a stubborn bout) but even when I’ve been sleeping well for years, the one thing I can’t shake is the horrible fear I won’t sleep when I have an important/exciting event the next day. Usually I do end up sleeping well those nights, but sometimes it does lead to a bad night! Wish I could shake that anxiety
Great and educational video my friend, bless you. Im 52 and started having insomnia about 18 months ago. Tried everything from sleep hygiene, to medication, nothing has worked. I either fall asleep, and wake up after 4 hours, or it takes 4 hours to sleep. I work out, eat right but nothing works. Regardless of how much sleep I get, still up at 6am for work.
I just feel exhausted all day. Would love any tips or help!
God Bless you
Michael
It sounds as though you'd be a great candidate for cognitive behavioral therapy for insomnia (CBT-I), Michael! Is that something you've tried or considered?
Hey Coach thanks for the great videos
Questions - how do I get over being so fixated about not going to the gym because I’m tired and also how tired I look? I feel like I’m losing muscle and losing my looks because of sleep. Is it as simple as just do what I want and stop caring? Cheers
Well, you can't control how you feel and you can't control how you sleep, unfortunately. Can you control the action of going to the gym and doing what's important to you even in the presence of all the difficult stuff you cannot control, though?
Hi Martin
I’ve just stumbled onto your channel this last fortnight. Watching you talk about sleep is almost like you are talking to me personally, (which is comforting)
When I was 41, was when I had my first panic filled sleepless night. It was horrible. Over the years I’ve tried many avenues to improve, and I have definitely improved. I’ve been meditating, walking and eating well just to name a few things. But I found myself relying on those things for a better night sleep. If I didn’t meditate, walk or eat well, I would start to stress and believe it would influence my coming sleep that night.
Through meditation, I’m getting better at watching my thoughts as they arise, but it’s still a work in progress. I’m now trying to let go of the notions that I need to do all my meditation, walking etc to just have a good sleep.
I’m 46 now, and through sheer persistence and observation I’ve noticed that it doesn’t really matter if I’ve done all my daily routine or not, i am still capable of having a good sleep. There’s no sure fire answer to what is coming up around the corner, so letting go is all that you can do.
I do still get anxious around sleep, and I still have bad nights and good nights. What helps me at the moment is taking a moment in or around bedtime to take time for gratitude for my day. Even just little things like, I have clean drinking water or I have a warm bed to lie in.
Thank you so much for your words of wisdom. You’re a gem of a human being. 🙏
Thank you so much for sharing, Matthew! Such a huge insight in this sentence, "I’ve noticed that it doesn’t really matter if I’ve done all my daily routine or not, I am still capable of having a good sleep.".
Sleep doesn't need us to do anything - often it's the very fact that we are trying that gets us caught up in a struggle with sleep! Feeling anxious is normal - it's evidence that you're a human being with human emotions! Like with sleep, it's often when we "try" (to fight or avoid that emotion) that we get caught up in a struggle!
Gratitude can be really powerful as a way to remind us of what truly makes life worth living - and all that stuff can still happen even after difficult nights and even in the presence of difficult thoughts and emotions!
@@InsomniaCoach gratitude is what I believe to be the reverse of stress. Practicing Gratitude feels a bit “forced” when I do it, because I’ve been practicing “stress” for so long. But maybe with practice and persistence It’ll become more natural. Thankyou so much for your work. It’s a huge help.🙏🙏😇
@@mattnsim I love it - thanks for sharing! Perhaps we can get you on the podcast as a guest one day?!
@@InsomniaCoach oh sure! If you think it’s a good idea. It’s ironic though, I’m typing this to you at 1:37am and I can’t sleep… my anxiety is going haywire. Happens from time to time. I usually find I get a rough couple of days every now and again.
@@mattnsim To have difficult nights is to be human. To experience anxiety is to be human. So, we know that you're definitely human!
You rightly mention safety which is the elephant in the room I'd say. Many of us with insomnia would love to do physical activities and exercise, because we never stop hearing how good that is for you and how it will help you sleep but if you have had really small amount of sleep, that can leave you in a dangerous state. My personal trainier told me that it was inadvisable to do weights after only 3 hours sleep, I have nearly had accidents cycling on 3 hours sleep, I have decided not to go on a skiing trip because that would also be dangerous and a few weeks ago I nearly crashed on the motorway driving back from visting my daughter because I almost fell asleep at the wheel - I was considering cancelling the visit but on the basis of all the advice to carry on living my life and trying to do the things I enjoy, I decided to go ahead with the trip but I almost died as a result. Any suggestions for these kinds of activities? Obviously I can sit and read or watch televsion but that's not really my 'best life', thanks
Perhaps there might be other activities you could engage in that would feel less risky or dangerous? Activities that are still related or connected to what's important to you? For example, if you feel that lifting weights wouldn't be safe, perhaps you might use the indoor rowing machine instead? I
f you are experiencing daytime sleepiness to such an extent that you feel you might feel asleep without warning, I'd encourage you to discuss that with your doctor (if you haven't already) since that level of daytime sleepiness is quite unusual for people with chronic insomnia and might be a symptom of another sleep issue (such as sleep apnea). It is, of course, possible for insomnia to exist alongside other sleep disorders.
I hope there's something useful here, James.
Hi. I am a personal trainer and I have chronic Insomia. science states that it's unproductive to train after not sleeping good as in to say you won't get anything out of it but you will. It reality it varies and obviously the more advance you are the more nutrition training and sleep wants to be a high quality as possible.
Not sure if your trainer uses RIR ( reps in reserve) in your workouts but it's a good auto regulation guide that I use. I do 5 week blocks of increasing Intensity starting at 2-3 reps in reserve week 1-2, 1-2 RIR week 2-3 and 1 rep in reserve week 4 followed by a week of half volume of the previous week. You need to be working between 0-5 rir in your workouts to get anything out of them so not necessarily all out every week but no less than 5 reps left in you each set you do. Utilising this method allows people to auto regulate so some days 1-2 rir might mean a 5 kg increase from previous, sometimes it might mean staying the same weight or going a little lower depending on how you feel. Sometimes the body just needs auto relegation and rest but not complete time off and sometimes regardless of sleep you'll suprise your self. For someone with chronic Insomia I find this method has really helped me and I suprise myself more times than not. I sometimes don't increase as fast as I like but there's always a increase. If I stopped completely I'd feel miserable. So it's finding a way to auto regulate and I guess you could kind of use it in other areas of life somehow.
@@warrenwright7165 Thank you for sharing your expert insight!
I go days without sleep and I’m so tired of laying in bed all night and never fall asleep. It has affected everything I do. I was missing work and it’s got me really depressed. I am so depressed over it. I took two weeks off to sleep but it hasn’t helped. I hate this. When am I ever going to be normal. I’m 74 and I have to force myself to sleep but after laying there all night I hate getting up. I’ve tried to find the window, and I have no interest as I always have in things I love even though I make myself read, walk and eat. I can’t remember things and this world is going crazy right now- totally depressing. I feel helpless.
Insomnia can definitely leave us feeling helpless - however, we always have control over our behaviors. You might find it helpful to explore whether it's proving helpful to try forcing sleep - often, when we try to make sleep happen it becomes a lot more difficult. Thank you for sharing that you are still able to read, walk, and eat even when your mind is telling you that you can't do anything because of chronic insomnia. I think that's a big insight.
I think if I convince myself that nothing "bad" will happen after not sleeping, most of my insomnia problems will be resolved and I won't have to worry or feel miserable after a bad night of sleep.
Great video with lots of value. Thank you very much. You deserve way more views.
Thank you
doc , i want to know what symptoms can do to me ? What are the symptoms actually are ? I only fear symptoms that they'll do something bad to me while on my job and I'm a pro athlete
It’s reassuring, Martin. Thanks
Glad to hear it! Thanks for sharing, and you are welcome!
My friends don’t enjoy my company as much because I am tired all the time now. I have never said no to a hang out but the offers come less and less as my insomnia continues. My work gets worse and worse and I make mistakes all the time and am slow. It’s a vicious cycle and I worry I’ll lose everything before I can break it.
Perhaps it might be worth making the offers yourself if spending time with friends is something that's important to you? What other types of activities are aligned with your values and interests that you could also pursue? How might you be kinder to yourself when things are really difficult?
You are a saviour!
I am merely the guide! I think that people who notice a positive change after taking action in response to the information I share are their own saviors!
Loved to hear about this particular topic, thanks!
Thanks for the feedback, Julie! I hope to record more videos on this topic in the future!
Thanks
You're welcome, Vikas!
Nothing brings meaning enrichment and joy to my life when I’m exhausted and miserable.
I appreciate you sharing that. When you are feeling exhausted and miserable you might want to practice being kind to yourself - acting and talking to yourself in a kind way, because what you are going through is hard. It might also be worth exploring some activities that are aligned with your values and reflect the person you want to be, even if they might not always bring you the level of joy and enrichment you are seeking.
Hello, I found your channel after suffering from acute insomnia. So far my insomnia is being controlled by medication. Would you be able to recommend continuing taking the Lunesta and Trazadone that I've been taking? Whats your experience with sleep meds?
The use of medication is a decision best taken by you, in consultation with your doctor. Many people with chronic insomnia don't see medication as a long-term solution and yet, everyone is different and you are the expert on you!
I’m curious how it is that NOT doing something that feels burdensome after a sleepless night ( but would
have felt fine if I’d slept) can prolong insomnia? I truly don’t understand it. I see it as one of the many double-edged swords I’ve come upon since I’ve had insomnia. I’ve often thought that knowing I have the CHOICE to cancel or skip an activity if I don’t feel up to it takes the pressure off me when I go to bed the night before. If I must do something, if I feel obligated to do it, then pressure to sleep mounts the night before.
I want less pressure on me at night. I wish the path to insomnia recovery would make fewer demands on me to do things that the insomnia itself makes me not want to do. Having a choice, having some control over life, and not feeling worried that one is making the wrong choice, would seem an important aspect of recovery, not a hindrance to recovery…
I think it comes down to the workability of our response. If we end up moving away from living the kind of life we want to live in response to what we're thinking or how we're feeling, that might not be helpful. At the end of the day, we are human beings (right?!) so we also need to be kind to ourselves. And, sometimes, an act of self-kindness might involve taking things easy. That only becomes a problem when we repeatedly end up doing things that aren't aligned with our values and keep moving further and further away from the kind of life we want to live as we try to change what we're thinking or feeling - since the difficult thoughts and feelings will always come back and now they're serving no purpose as we're not doing things that are important and meaningful.
It started for me by going easy on myself and letting myself off things because I was too tired. But this grew to avoiding things just in case it's triggers me and I don't sleep. So early morning starts, holidays, and many other things became so frightening that I just wouldn't do them. So I created a bigger problem. So now I try and live my life according to my values whether I sleep or not. It's not always easy but I'm not fueling the anxiety cycle.
@@squirrelmummy Thank you for sharing this huge insight, Christy!
@@squirrelmummy Has this latter approach improved your sleeping?
For me, not feeling as though I must do things when I’m exhausted has relieved pressure and anxiety. (None of my values seem to have changed since I’ve had insomnia…)
I do hope you are sleeping better. That’s what matters most.
How do you live with the low mood and anxiety related to no sleep
Since we don't have direct control over our feelings and emotions, perhaps acknowledging them, being kind to ourselves, and committing to do things that are important, meaningful, or otherwise keep us moving toward the kind of life we want to live and the person we want to be might be a workable way of living with those difficult things?
When the exhaustion is very bad and you feel it physically e.g. elevated BP, chest pains etc. What's the best approach? currently I will lay in bed or the couch partly due to fear that physically exerting myself may lead to unwanted negative results and I wouldn't have listened to my body.
Those symptoms sound like they might be connected to heightened arousal/anxiety rather than fatigue/exhaustion - but I would suggest discussing them with your doctor.
Should I go the gym after a bad night
Hi. I have impaired sleep for 9 months. At first it was clearly a shock to the brain. As time goes by I seem to recover. My blood pressure is almost back to normal, my heart beats too, I don’t have headaches anymore and I believe my hormonal panel to be recovering somewhat also. Waking up during the night does not give me panic anymore, or rough breathing or anything.
However, my sleep is still impaired. I have a hard time falling asleep and I have around 6-8 wake ups, every 2 hours and then more as day comes. Especially the last hour before waking up, I feel I sleep but I am awake.
Should I simply let things at peace to improve or should I begin sleep restriction?
My issue came from mild tinnitus so it is as if the brain got into a shock and resisted to “let go”. It’s a weird thing. Now the more I habituate and let go, the better but my sleep is still very broken. So I don’t know whether I am habituating to the impaired state or actually recovering lol.
What do you suggest I do?
If you usually spend a lot of time awake at night, sleep restriction can be helpful. You might find this page helpful: insomniacoach.com/sleep-restriction-therapy/
Yes thoughts are thoughts, but falling over and bumping into things because you’re so tired is not😭On day two of no sleep HOW DO I FIX THIS
What, exactly, are you trying to fix? If I had a magic wand and could fix this for you, what would I fix - and what would you then be doing differently with your life?
So, I have a silly question... why do we sleep?
I’ve been researching.. and there’s a lot of research theories that suggest why... but no consolidated evidence. I guess it remains a mystery?
This thought process has been swirling in my mind... which in turn has led me to not sleep!! My problem is accepting uncertainty.
Does anyone else have this problem?
There are no silly questions! The fact is, nobody knows for sure why we sleep - however, once we have been awake for long enough, sleep will always happen!
Question after 2 hours that I try to sleep all of a sudden I feel so uncomfortable I can’t even go back to my bed cause I feel terrible so I just know after 2 hours laying in bed that I won’t sleep after what should I do in that situation
If it doesn't feel good to spend two hours in bed trying to sleep, it might be worth getting out of bed whenever being in bed doesn't feel good. I think it's OK to spend time awake in bed for as long as being in bed feels good because that means conditions are right for sleep!
Any tips on how to I get my brain to not worry about sleep each time I awake during the night? I'm finding that I really struggle with this and I don't want it to become a habit.
Since we can't control what our mind does, I think the struggle can come from all our attempts to control what the mind does! A more workable approach might be allowing the mind to worry - acknowledging the worry, making space for it, and allowing it to come and go as it pleases.
I've used Ativan 1 mg for 1.5 months after that I got this insomnia, I don't understand whether it's snoring problem or its normal. Problem is that i don't know when I'm going to sleep, I can only tell by dreams that I'm sleeping. Once I go to sleep, I woke up in the middle of the night and can't able to sleep back. After using Ativan I used antipsychotic drugs for sleep. I don't whether these medicines made my situation more miserable
Hello Anil,
I am having the same problems.
In January 2021 I went through some stress and I was prescribed an Antipsychotic medicine called 'Risperidone', that was changed to 10mg of Olanzapine. They help me sleep but if I don't take it for a night, I struggle to sleep. I sleep for around and hour and then wake up! Once i wake up, I cannot go back to sleep as I do no feel sleepy.
I wonder if this could be the Antipsychotic medicine that has caused the problem.
How long have you had insomnia?
It's been 9 months since I stopped Ativan , but qpen 50 and Loreanz 5 are the antipsychotic drugs which i used for long time that is from Aug to dec
@@strictlynotraitors8004 same situation here I take sedative called mirtizipane and if I don’t take it at night I’m shaking and have adrenaline surges
@@vibingbig488 How long have you been taking it?
@@strictlynotraitors8004 1 year
do you have any program how to get rid of insomnia.
You might want to start with my free insomnia sleep training course: insomniacoach.com/sleep-training/?ref=youtube
I have been trying to get up the nerve to go about my day after poor nights. I do want to ask about driving. I have read on the Net that driving when sleep deprived is like driving drunk. Because of that concern, I wind up canceling an appointment in a nearby city when I don't sleep, and that is very regrettable to have to do that.
That can be a tricky one, Janie! I think safety trumps everything - so if you feel as though you might fall asleep without warning, then you probably shouldn't drive! I think it can be helpful to recognize that chronic insomnia is not the same as sleep deprivation. People with chronic insomnia don't usually fall asleep without warning during the day since they tend to be more "tired and wired" rather than excessively sleepy during the day.
@@InsomniaCoach it seems that my reflexes might also be slowed
@@janieellington1014 Thanks for sharing. Perhaps there might be other things you could do, things that are aligned with your values and keep you moving toward the kind of life you want to live when you feel your reflexes might be slowed?
Thank you Martin so much for your videos and insight! Just watching a few videos and already feeling more calm and less pressure to sleep 8 hrs like I used to. My bedtime is very consistent 11pm and it's easy to fall asleep but then I wake at 4am or 4:30am to go to the bathroom and then I have a hard time going back to sleep or just lightly sleeping until I give up around 6:30am. I want to sleep from 11pn to 7am but it's just not happening. I am too sleepy to extend my bedtime beyond 11pm. Should I restrict my sleep by waking up earlier with an alarm? I'm getting about 6-6.5 hrs of actual sleep average per night. Wondering if I should force myself to wake up at 5 or 5:30am wiith sleep restriction on the wake time side?
My sleep therapist told me to determine the time I want to get up and count back 7 hours. So I go to bed at midnight when I am really ready to sleep and I do!
It might be worth exploring why you have a strong desire to sleep until 7:00 AM - because, quite often, it can be our desire to get a certain amount or type of sleep that actually creates sleep disruption!
@@kathydougherty779 Thanks for sharing!
@@InsomniaCoach Yes Martin I think that is the case. Just recently I have stopped worrying about my "sleep time" and simply going to bed when tired. I let go of having to be up at 7am. I am now getting solid sleep with the help of your CBT-I techniques and specifically going to bed when tired and waking up when I do. I think I was getting overly anxious about waking up and worried I wouldn't get back to sleep. Now I know I will. It helped that you said everyone wakes up during the night and that that is normal. I kept reminding myself that each time. Thank you!!!
@@nataliedescioli3331 Thank you so much for sharing - it sounds like you are doing great, and that's entirely down to you!
Hi, coach good morning is it okay to take a bath in the morning if you have not sleep at night?
I'm not sure why that wouldn't be OK, Eli - what's your concern?
Hi I’m sleeping light sleep one day next day deep next day light and I’m following bed time restriction for over 3 weeks, I’m 2 and a half weeks free from medication but I have one day of deep and one light can u please come back and make a video about light and how to deepen stage of sleep
Sleep restriction can help with this since it generally creates less wakefulness during the night and more consolidated sleep. A feeling of "light sleep" can be a symptom of heightened arousal/monitoring for sleep, too. The fact of the matter is, though, that the body always prioritizes deep sleep - and so it will always generate enough deep sleep.
@@InsomniaCoach it’s duo to u that I was able to quit my medication I might lessen the day spent in bed to build more sleep drive and make the body prioritise deep sleep I wanna ty for that
@@vibingbig488 You are welcome! It sounds as though you are taking action to create better conditions for sleep and are making great progress already!
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I really have a question to ask. Do u know why I can't fall asleep after reaching hypnagogic state and stay with this for a long time despite being enough sleepy ?
Are you feeling sleepy as in it's almost impossible to remain awake, or are you feeling really fatigued? It's easy to confuse the two but fatigue isn't usually a sign that you're ready for sleep whereas sleepiness is! Cut down to basics, if you aren't falling asleep then your body isn't ready for sleep at that time - either you haven't been awake for long enough or arousal is too high for sleep to happen at that time. However, sleep will always happen in the end. If you ever find yourself jerking awake as you fall asleep, you might find this video helpful: th-cam.com/video/KFlxiXbYQag/w-d-xo.html
I have been experiencing some on and off sleep disturbances for the past 2 months. When I’m up & about I sleep much better but I find after some very good consecutive sleeps .. a day may come about that I am very inactive perhaps a Sunday ... and I will find myself falling asleep early(8-9pm) & easily but awakening at 2-3am and being unable to go back to sleep . Not sure how to deal because in life not everyday you are going to be super active .
If I don't walk every day for half an hour I have insomnia. You have to tire your body out every day. I find walking is best way for me.
Getting a bit less sleep one night per week might not be as big of an issue as it seems when you first consider it - does that one night of a couple of hours of less sleep have a truly negative impact on your quality of life? If not, it might not be worth spending much time worrying about!
@@kathydougherty779 Glad to know you have found walking helpful!
Is having a lie down during the day to regain some energy okay?
You are the expert on you, Lina! Often, being sedentary can promote fatigue rather than help us regain energy. Furthermore, if you nap during the day you reduce sleep drive and that can make sleep more difficult at night.
Coach please I have a question..I’m 47 and had cronic insomnia sice I was 18.lt was occasional but the last year got so aggressive and I was tired 6 days per week.now I’m implementing sleep restriction since 3 monthes. I’m seeing some improvements but I’ not able to feel the desire to sleep at night .and feel extremly sleepy in the morning..my question is why your gusts recover in only 8 weeks even som if them have the same of my condition..l’m exhausted every day..my face looking older and have black spots around my eyes..do you think this technique isn’t for me??? Where there people that you know had the same of my experienc and was able to recover!!please I’m confused..thank for your time pelping people🌹
Hi Samiah, it might help to have your hormones checked out. It could be the start of menopause. Google Lara Briden, she writes about hormones and sleep as well. @Martin: is there a section in your program for (peri)menopausal women? For many 40+ girls the shift in hormones can cause sleep issues, which sometimes can only be resolved with supplements or hormone replacement therapy. Hope you are mindful of this. Maybe you could do a snippet about this. I think it is worth mentioning.
@@MiaFazecas thanks for anawering me..yah that’s can be a good reason for my condition.
@@MiaFazecas Hormonal changes can definitely create sleep disruption and if people are experiencing ongoing sleep disruption and have found no change in the way they think about sleep and have not noticed any changes in their sleep-related behaviors in response to that sleep disruption, tackling the hormone shift might be the sole solution. If not, it might be worth tackling the hormone shift while also tackling the thoughts and behaviors that can perpetuate sleep disruption!
There is a good example in the Insomnia Coach Podcast of a client who experienced sleep disruption during (peri)menopause - she was able to improve her sleep by exploring her sleep-related thoughts and behaviors.
Here's the episode:
How Gretchen went from believing she was the world’s worst sleeper to someone who sleeps well and has confidence in her own natural ability to sleep (#16) - insomniacoach.com/gretchen-worst-sleeper-sleep-confidence-ep16/
I hope this is helpful!
Your experience doesn't sound unusual - and it sounds as though you are experiencing some improvements in your sleep since implementing sleep restriction. If you are concerned about morning sleepiness (which might be a symptom of sleep inertia) and your appearance, then I would suggest talking to your doctor. If you are diagnosed with chronic insomnia, the recommended treatment is usually cognitive behavioral therapy for insomnia (CBT-I). I hope this helps!
@@InsomniaCoach Thank you so much for your reply. I think there’s still so much to learn in terms of hormones and the link with sleep in women. I’m glad there’s an episode with a client, where this is tackled. This underlines the fact that there’s always a way back to sleeping better 😊 Hopeful thoughts!
Is there a way to do cbti with you personally (Skype) or do you recommend someone who you trust?
I don't do CBT-I since I am a coach and not a therapist. I can educate clients on CBT-I (and many other evidence-based) techniques and I help support them as they make changes they feel will be appropriate for them - either through my online course or through my phone coaching package. All these options can be found on my website at insomniacoach.com
Hey Martin I started to get this kind of od insomnia in the last month or so out of no where because one night of bad sleep. Ever since then my sleep has been sporadic. problem is I’ve been going back and fourth between sleeping with my gf at her apartment and back to my parents home for last month on and off and I think it screwed with knowing how to sleep properly. Before this like the month before I was sleeping 8 plus hours a day so I’m wondering the quicker I take action and try and get ride of this now. The more effective I assume it will be to take early intervention?
Also another thing the problem is I got all out of wack with what time I go to bed they are very late sleepers and I am light sleeper so it messes with waking me up to cause they are doing things around like 3 am when I would usually just be asleep then.
I think having a regularly changing sleep environment can create some sleep disruption - or at least the potential for some sleep disruption. You mentioned that you feel you don't know how to sleep properly - this, in itself, implies that you might be putting effort into sleep. Sleep happens by itself and requires no effort, attention, or knowledge! It's often when we try to get involved in the process that sleep becomes more difficult! With this in mind, it might simply be helpful to only go to bed when you feel sleepy enough for sleep and to see if you might be able to maintain a consistent out of bed time in the morning. I hope this helps!
@@InsomniaCoach Okay I’ll try that thanks so much! I will start getting out of bed at same time everyday my sleep has just been so disrupted by going to sleep at different hour every night and sometimes when I can’t sleep waiting in bed until I fall asleep even though I should just get out of bed and for now on. because of your videos that I just stumbled upon 2 days ago my anxiety has gone down allot cause I used the internet to search what can I do to fix this and for some reason the first things these sights mentioned were if you don’t get sleep you can get heart disease, cancer etc which just kinda made me paranoid about having to get to bed!
@@thebeals572 Glad this was helpful - and I appreciate you sharing that you are feeling less anxious about sleep after finding the channel! There's no evidence that chronic insomnia causes any health problem whatsoever - so hopefully that might be one less thing to worry about! You might like my podcast episode with Dr. Jade Wu where we bust that and other common sleep/insomnia myths: insomniacoach.com/busting-sleep-insomnia-myths-jade-wu-ep13/
I'm watching this early in the morning after not getting enough sleep. 😴🥱
I am sure you aren't alone! Do you have any activities planned for today to help you continue to live by your values, independently of sleep?
Sorry I don’t understand the fun and enjoyable activities part before bed there is no such a thing as fun and enjoyable and not simulating I’m sorry that’s just facts who wanna get out of bed every 30 mins and read a fk book ? Lmao
If getting out of bed to read a book doesn't feel appealing, that suggests that being in bed feels more appealing - so, in that situation, I wouldn't suggest someone gets out of bed because that implies that conditions are right for sleep!
@@InsomniaCoach u confused me there, So we shouldn’t get out bed during the sleep window if all the other activities seem too simulating / boring
@@vibingbig488 If being in bed feels good, that suggests conditions are right for sleep - so why get out of bed?