.ᴱᴰᴱᴺ - 02 : 09. There are two primary choices in life: to accept conditions as they exist, or accept responsibility for changing them. “When I’m older I’ll do this” and “In a few years I’ll do that.” My real life, I’ve always imagined, will begin once I graduate and, when I wasn’t in school, it was after my boxes were unpacked, once the cardboard was broken down, the books shelved, the paintings matted and hung on freshly coated walls. It was a matter of when the vitamins would kick in, when I’d start juicing, begin running, sleep sooner, wake earlier. It was always a matter of time and some doing and one day. It’s been a terrible tendency, this tendency to put off living, to look at my life and say this isn’t my real life, not yet at least. I suffered with depression and an eating disorder that would continue for a long time. A lot of my friends never knew about the way I felt. I was always “the funny one” and became loud and overconfident to mask what I was actually feeling. Food became comfort for me, and always in the privacy of my own room. High school soon ended, and I welcomed that with open arms. I saw the next stage in my education as a new beginning. I loved my friends with all my heart, but I thought a change of scenery and a chance to meet new people would help me change the way I looked at myself and my issues. But nothing really changed. I met some amazing people, discovered my love for music again, and had some wonderful times. But I was still burying issues and hiding behind jokes and overconfidence. I had to be the one to make the decision to change my way of thinking. I now realize those things aren’t what make me who I am. Nothing about my past is any different, but I have changed the way I think about myself and my surroundings. There’s something much bigger than us and our problems. I think it is always important to remember that there is always someone who is in a position much worse than our own. Nevertheless, I am well on the way to becoming the person I want to be and I have goals and expectations of myself. I am now aware that my life has started.
.ᴱᴰᴱᴺ - 02 : 09.
There are two primary choices in life: to accept conditions as they exist, or accept responsibility for changing them.
“When I’m older I’ll do this” and “In a few years I’ll do that.”
My real life, I’ve always imagined, will begin once I graduate and, when I wasn’t in school, it was after my boxes were unpacked, once the cardboard was broken down, the books shelved, the paintings matted and hung on freshly coated walls. It was a matter of when the vitamins would kick in, when I’d start juicing, begin running, sleep sooner, wake earlier.
It was always a matter of time and some doing and one day.
It’s been a terrible tendency, this tendency to put off living, to look at my life and say this isn’t my real life, not yet at least.
I suffered with depression and an eating disorder that would continue for a long time.
A lot of my friends never knew about the way I felt. I was always “the funny one” and became loud and overconfident to mask what I was actually feeling. Food became comfort for me, and always in the privacy of my own room.
High school soon ended, and I welcomed that with open arms. I saw the next stage in my education as a new beginning. I loved my friends with all my heart, but I thought a change of scenery and a chance to meet new people would help me change the way I looked at myself and my issues.
But nothing really changed.
I met some amazing people, discovered my love for music again, and had some wonderful times. But I was still burying issues and hiding behind jokes and overconfidence.
I had to be the one to make the decision to change my way of thinking.
I now realize those things aren’t what make me who I am. Nothing about my past is any different, but I have changed the way I think about myself and my surroundings.
There’s something much bigger than us and our problems. I think it is always important to remember that there is always someone who is in a position much worse than our own.
Nevertheless, I am well on the way to becoming the person I want to be and I have goals and expectations of myself. I am now aware that my life has started.
U r so underrated