I was mistyped as INTP, INFJ and ENTJ, but the farther i went into the MBTI rabbit hole, i found out i was an INTJ, i had a wrong idea about INTJ's because of the over-glorification by the community but deep down, every INTJ is a scaredy cat who is afraid of getting hurt, anyways i am done with MBTI long ago but i still watch Kristin's vid because i enjoy them, this comment hits hard.
lmao I can relate soooooo much I got into the habit of "talking" to my self as a therapist as a way of trying to resolve my emotional and personal problems
I love how it takes ISTPs a matter of weeks to realize that they were hurt by that insult, usually remembering it out of the blue. An accurate representation of my ISTP cousin! 😉
Of course, it's exaggerated for funsies, but I was genuinely surprised at how true that was, literally - Hah, seriously? Wait, is it? Oh FFS yeah it is
For the ISTP I know, it takes months...maybe a year lbvs. Treats me like "trash"/says mean jokes/acts like he doesn't care when I kind of can tell he does, then about once year he sends some feely message like, " why won't you let me love you?" "Or did you know you were the love of my life?" I respond later then he says, "oh that was a drunk text." Or just says, "Blah" with stone face.
INTJ reaction to being genuinely hurt: Just quietly slip away, worry and ruminate about it for ages and try to distract myself with project work. If someone asks what's the matter, just say "Nothing." If they persist, snap at them. Get annoyed at self for feeling hurt and for being so weak. Listen to melancholy music. Melancholy is the word that best describes it.
I thought INFP was photographing the plant, but showing the chat to the plant makes sense. The plant would understand, and give its genuine reaction. Maybe this was the reason I started talking to my ex-girlfriend's cat during an upsetting break-up.
Yea I guess the main reason is because like the internet aswell we try to figure out why we are sad hurt or upset and eal with it and try to be like hey it's okay and comfort ourselves for a while till we feel better
@@nathanreedy4380 hey just try to mybe take time for urself for a while like maybe say ur sleepy and then just chill watch whatever u enjoy and makes u happy and also try to sit with urself and ask why maybe u feel hurt like ask what hurt me was It something that happened or was said was it something earlier am I stressed about something I am hiding or suppressing I would really like to help u tbh u seem like u might need urself someone to talk to I wouldn't mind tbh it I would enjoy it and would be glad if u did reply back to me to see if it helped in anyway
ENTPs can take the bender approach to. The worst I was ever hurt was after a death... Three days. Little sleep. Lotsa caffeine... Started hallucinating. Fell asleep for a marathon blackout. Woke up moved on.
(INTJ) As much as we'd like to perpetuate this image, we do get hurt and feel it very strongly, but almost never show it to the outside world. We probably resemble the INFP more than anything else when we are hurt and get stuck in loops in our head. Personally, I feel sick to my stomach (literally) and can't focus. Whether anyone has ever seen this in action though, I'm doubtful.
I was once friends with an ESFP (I'm am ENFP) and when I was hurt I just wanted to talk but they kept avoiding it and saying let's do this, let's go there... That's when we started drifting apart. The differences are subtle but they sting. Felt like we never really understood each other
Funnily enough, that is exactly what I do. I sit down, possibly for days, trying to find out a solution to how to stop feeling hurt. I once spent 3 months tirelessly chipping away at the solution to getting over an emotional crisis. And I did! - INTP
@@Joey-rs7uq I don't know how to explain it. The first step is to figure out the reason behind the emotions, and the second step varies depending on what you find out in the first step. ~ INTP
In my experience, thinking about it only prolongs the hurt. It's fuel to the fire. If you can just accept the emotions and let them flow through you, it will quickly pass. This is not easy when you're an INTP because your mind is so active but it's still the best way.
INTJ, yup quite true....which has the unfortunate side effect of meaning that the ones who do hurt us are the ones we believed to be trustworthy and safe making hurts from them absolutely crushing if/when they occur. Those are the times you wish you were the oblivious ISTP or ESTJ.
As an ISTP female, yes, I can detach from feelings quite fine, but guess what. We, or some of us, have a thing for ENFPs. As for me, I quite admire them for being able to express that supressed Fi that I have and be so confident about it so that makes me to like them more easily, even if I don't actually know them (they will anyway make themselves known pretty fast). This bubbly (quite dumb.. ) positive and friendly feeler creature.. They are so chaotic that I might follow them blindly for a while. Anyway, it quite hurts on the spot when these people hurt me (of course, verbally). I might actually not understand what is happening but I do feel uncomfortable and it disturbs my day/week - depends of how close I feel to that ENFP and if it was the partner, well that's worst case scenario (I recovered from such a thing in almost a year. The first 4 months were terrible). Everyone is actually sensitive in a way but you might never find out about them.
So true. If they attempt to gaslight you as a response to you addressing how they hurt you, you fear trusting anyone again, especially if they did it for years before you figured out what they were doing to you. You then wish you were oblivious to the emotional effects of not being able to trust anyone. - one INTJ
The other day I was with my ISTP dad and he suddenly said: It's not fair! I looked at him and he said: She killed the protagonist's dog and still got to be the emperor's wife, that's not fair! About the villainess of a Chinese drama we had finished like three weeks before. It was the cutest the funniest thing ever 😂
The INFJ hit so close to home! I have noticed that I can sometimes take jokes against me quite personally leading to a rabbit hole of thinking ‘there’s something wrong with me’. This at the time makes me want to distance myself from the people. Great video! 👏🏻👏🏻
College years are rough because guy humor at that age is the friend group roasting one another religiously. Can’t help but feeling like people openly hate you
Same here especially when I was younger. Now I have boundaries set up so that I protect myself... and others! Gotta love the ''pun'' Kristin made using our cognitive functions. Ni Fe = NiFe🔪 😂When we're young or unhealthy we WILL use that NiFe to ''cut'' someone as deep as possible if we're at our wits end.
@@PippaPasses I never understood that type of humour. I'd say it's solely a bro thing, but girls do it, too. I knew two girls in high school who would roast each other and call each other the b word and they were best friends. It kinda horrified me.
I'm an INFJ, too, and I actually like that humor to some extent. My bf and I roast each other constantly, too. But it's because we don't touch topics that could hurt the other one and are quite obviously joking. Others are way less mindful or more ruthless or both. oh yes how my feelings got hurt constantly back in school 🙄
We get our feelings hurt all the time. People have regularly thought I wasn't hurt by something, or it was nbd, my whole life. I've literally said, "I'm really hurt by this" or "this is really hard for me," and they dismiss it because my tone and body language are calm. It's kinda awful, actually. -INTJ (who is old enough and healthy enough to say the things I couldn't in my 20s)
Same here. I'm realizing that I have "analysis paralysis" when it comes to figuring out how to respond to being hurt, which usually results in never expressing it or saying something brief that lacks sufficient drama for other people to take it seriously. I *could* unleash the pent up decades of repressed hurt upon a single person who has newly hurt me, but then there would be a giant crater in the Earth to repair and a lot of questions to answer. -INTJ
@@alicialexists I can help you- oh wait, I have trust issues as well - an INFJ with 5w6 but wing 6 is ten times dominating my overprotective personality
I feel you, no one takes us seriously when we feel hurt coz we always portray the most understanding friend, and that's our fault. We should express ourselves and set boundaries, but in a healthy way. Explain it so it will be understood and acknowledged and you can give the other person a chance
@@HerKnightable Funnily enough, since booze can make you feel loose as a goose. That can help you with coming up with the proper logical solutions when the emotions aren't pressing on your mind and making things irrational. lol
The ISTP part is scarily accurate lmfaoo. Then by the time you realise, you're not sure how to bring it up and you swear to yourself that you'll say something to them in the moment next time.
The trick is to just bring it up the first time even though it's been some time. It's not so bad, just be like "So I've been thinking about what you said about X, and it made me feel Y."
Polar Fi is hard, feelings go away so easily. Because of that, it doesn't get absorbed and ends up getting brushed off. I admire ISFPs for this, having the time to actually think about feelings, expand it then soak it in, allowing the self to feel that way and validating it. If I have one day to switch to a type, it'd be them. - resident ESTP
The ISTP one is accurate. The 'feelings' only manifest in the moment as numbness or irritation and I often end up externalising them (via snarky comments or withdrawal) before even realising I was upset, let alone figuring out the reason why
I have to admit I also do the same thing as an INFJ. I can use self sarcasm and self irony to masochistic levels, but if someone else tries to hurt me psychologically I start planning the ultimate revenge
And in the end you only end up hurting yourself more even if your revenge succeeds. Take a book from ENFP or ESFP page and just talk to someone for once!
If someone hurts me, it's not that big of a big deal. But hurt someone i love, and I'll spend every second of every day plotting for revenge. You won't see it coming and it will be in an unconventional way.
@@firespawnie537we should from time to time. That detail is what I like about Kristin. She showed our "mirroring technique" from the perception from hers to ours. I didn't know how cute and witty we looked!
@@firespawnie537Having had an ENFP best friend for years has helped me greatly at venting negative emotions! And her too for other things, such a great combo!
As an istp, this is pretty scary true. After my break up with my ex, i realized a lot of hurting comments which she told me. While dating, i thought those were a part of the "conversation" we used to have! Like an "argument" or some sort...
ENFP here!! the very long convo definitely ends with talking about something entirely unrelated like how everything turns into crabs or what the world would be like without money or if you'd rather have sponges for hands or never ask a question again... endless possibilities!
@@coin3720 your hands are like hands, they have one joint at the knuckles and you feel pain and touch through them, you have fingers! but they are material sponge. there is a transition into your wrists.
@@melnevianza1767and the weirdest shit is our feet are so damn unnecessary complicated why tf would evolution end up in that monstrosity of a billion knuckles and bones And everything crab
yeah and in my exp either everything is cool with whoever hurt me or i just don't really talk to them again but i'm not mad. it's pretty breezy. i laughed when she went into her room cos i knew exactly what would happen :p
Ok, INTJ here. Yeah, in most cases, that is exactly true. But sometimes, sometimes, we'll let some people close enough that they might hurt us, and oh boy, does it hurt then. In those cases, we'll go over and over what happened to figure out if we did something wrong and how to prevent it in the future - and prevent it we will! And some of us will also think of all the ways we could get some sweet revenge but never actually do anything to enact that because it's rarely worth it, and drop even those thoughts soon because keeping whoever hurt us in our minds for too long is giving them energy and time they simply don't deserve.
Yeah, when we let people in they can hurt us. Also, acting rightly and justly and being punished for it can really really hurt us also. We get hurt a lot I think, is why we lock our emotions away.... 😕
I also I dont let anyone in when I find out that I've hurt someone. I just replay the event knowing that I was the problem over and over thinking that I SHOULD have known.
Yeah as an ISFJ I do both the INTP and ISFJ methods here. I start out blaming myself for the issue for awhile, but if it takes forever to get over it I go inward and try to find a solution or figure out why it still hurts and how I can productively feel better.
That's very real I went through a really bad heartbreak last year and I distracted myself with Netflix, comics and music, basically. Anything to suppress the unpleasant emotions that I can't deal with. On another note, I don't think that actually helps, my social anxiety has gotten worse It's conflicting not wanting to face reality and also being self-aware at the same time-
Same here, scrolling through the comments to see a fellow ENTP relating lol. I usually do escapism, then when the feelings aren't that raw, somehow make it into a funny anecdotal story that either makes people laugh or worry about me lmao
Me with my firts Teen Crush. I knew he wasn't going to like me back so I saw so many movie recaps that I didn't see it as a sad time XD I think with the time I just forget it
ENFP: "Do you have seven hours to talk?" YES. This is basically exactly what I did when my ESFJ friend really hurt me a while ago. I sat her down, and we talked it out. It was so good. Thanks for this, Kristin! -ENFP EDIT: And correct me if I'm wrong, but I would presume that ENFPs would want to talk it out--most likely after they've processed it for themselves--because of their dominant Ne paired with secondary Fi, and so they would want to express their feelings through talking to their friend, whereas ESFPs would--after they've processed it themselves--want to go DO something with their friend to express how their friend hurt them because of their dominant Se and secondary Fi. And ISFPs and INFPs would most likely process their hurt alone because of their dominant Fi. And then the ISFP would move on because of their secondary Se calling them to go do something, whereas the INFP would hang on to it for longer because, due to their secondary Ne, they live in their mind. But this is all just my theory. SECOND EDIT: I love how I originally posted something, then went about my day, thought about it in depth, came back, and edited another paragraph, then thought about THAT more, and went back to add another paragraph... and then came back to write this. XD * Ne be like *
I’m an infp. My husband is the only one I want to talk to and open my feelings to, hurt being one of them. I keep things to myself otherwise. I can act passive aggressive and cold sometimes when hurt but I’m not gonna want to talk about my feelings. When I had a cat I used to cry out to him and tell him all my problems. He carried a lot 😅
omg the ESTJ hahaha! Can't believe I relate. Sometimes that happens to me too. I'm like, UGH! I feel gross inside, why? And then I realize that during the previous conversation some things where said that made me feel bad, and then I completely forgot about it but the feeling lingered on. Also I can't count how many times in my life I was feeling off and I thought I was about to have a cold, but the cold never came and I realized I was having emotions!
Then the ENFP proceeded to start the conversation with the backstory behind getting hurt inserting any tangent that they decide to go on because “you will need all this for the context”, then actually properly going into it about an hour in, still going on tangents, then trying to excuse the other persons behaviour and being like “yeah but I don’t really feel like I can be mad because they are going through their own stuff, but I am still hurt by it”, and then the rest of the call is random anecdotes and exploring ideas because really the ENFP just wants to feel understood, valued and loved again after being hurt, and needs to be in their element to bring back that energy.
ESTJ here: now around 30 I have actually started questioning a lot if I'm legitimately feeling a real feeling or just making it up because I think I'm supposed to feel things and it's a very not fun spiral to go down lmao. And yes, I would care about forgetting to buy tomatoes. It's probably going to be very inconvenient now that whatever plans I had are derailed from the lack of tomatoes
The INTJ is definitely off today. I'd love it if nothing ever hurt me. But I've looked after 20-something cats between the ones I've owned and the ones friends I've lived with have owned. And five dogs that I can remember. (There's a sixth that I can't). I've also buried one set of great-grandparents, two sets of grandparents, and my father just two months ago now. And that's not counting other things I've had happen to upset me. I know we're supposed to be robots, but we're really, really not. Though I am running out of people to die on me. So there's that. But I also have a cat that I'm not confident will make it to the end of the year, and another one that could always surprise me because he's got a bad heart. INTJs are picky about which people they get attached to. But we're also extremely loyal once we've decided. Losing someone is devastating.
My best friend is an INTJ, and I can see how much she cares about me! We talk about any random bulls*it, whether it's basic, dumb stuff or a philosophical / scientific matter, listening to each other's rant with actual pleasure! Also, whenever I'm in need she's always there: giving me rational, wise advises, arguing with third parties to defend me (I do the same to defend her, obviously), and filling me with encouraging words. She doesn't trust people easily, and I genuinely appreciate the fact that she feels safe and comfortable around me. 💕
Ikr? That's why i refuse to adopt a pet. I pretty much act like i don't really want one bc i don't want to tell people that I'm not having a pet bc they die.
@@arfar.m INTP here - I literally said that to a sister-in-law a few years back. "I don't really want a dog because they only live so long, and then they die." She tried to convince me that that wasn't the thing I should be focused on, but to me it's a waste of tender feelings, to finally, finally open up and love something with all my heart, and then have it die on me.
@@arfar.m I do not regret having my pets. Some live long lives. Some do not. But they would still live without me. Or possibly they would have been killed in a shelter without me. By providing a home I save lives. And I have great companionship and love.
Funny story: I did the personality test and found out the result is ENFJ. Then I started doubting about it being right. Found this video, and sure enough the ENFJ is THE EXACT CONVERSATION I had a couple of days ago with someone from my team at work (except for the fear to group chats). Thanks for these funny bits Kristin! :)
You must be young. Even if you verify others motives, they may surprise you. Human beings are unpredictable variables in life, therefore it's best to anticipate that they may not be as they appear. This holds true for people who appear trustworthy.
@@bhorsehappy I get it. I think we sometimes struggle to open up because we don't know how to handle the pain. I guess we're capable of so many things but aren't the best when it comes to emotions...
I was like that too but I might have been an unhealthy ENTJ cause now i'll make you sit down politely let you know what's wrong with what you said how it reflected on me and worn you to never do that again, communication is a must to keep a relationship going and make it stable.
Even though we have the same Ti/Fe relationship, I do seem to hurt much easier than my ISTP cousins. They have an ability to shrug things off of which I am envious. Conversely, they seem (even) less aware of how their words might come across as hurtful to others. Giving up trying to solve my feelings has been one of the longest but also one of the most worthwhile struggles of my life. As my fellow INTP over at xkcd put it: "my normal approach is useless here".
That sums it up quite well for me as well. After years of trying different solutions that involved logic, I couldn't find a solution. So, when a podcaster I liked mentioned the best way to process painful emotions was to just "let yourself feel them" I was desperate enough to try and give into the feeling madness. To my surprise, it worked, contingent upon one thing: if I let myself just feel my emotions for too long (think recurringly over the course of 2 or more days), then it started to generate more problems instead of helping, and I ended up stuck in replaying the same negative emotions over and over instead of moving past them. So, I set a rule in my mind that if I started to let myself do it long enough for me to stick myself in a loop, I would immediately stop trying to feel and try to think about something else. This is how I solve negative emotions to this day.
Also, I theorize the reason INTPs seem to get more easily hurt than ISTPs is because we have Si and can get stuck into a loop of constantly remembering moments in our lives with Si that we then try to solve with Ti.
@@danielfranklin9784 ENFPs are concidered like one of the most sensitive personality types and while my ISTP friend is brushing everything off, INTPs being a bit more logical then ENFPs (or ar least me) getting hurt really hard easily
"As an INFJ" 🤣... that's totally true for me! Outside I'm like "no problem that's ok ☺️" but inside I want to systematically destroy the person. But it's only for a few minutes, after that I'm at peace again. 🧘♀️
for me, it usually takes a couple days of processing for the real hurt to hit - ISTP - but sometimes we can be hurt right away, it's not always time-delayed - depends on who did the hurting.
Watching an ISTP slowly process that they're hurt about something that happened and gearing themselves up to talk to me about it is one of the most stressful things in the world 😅. -INFP
So true to the INTJ one, '2nd most extreme' way to handle someone or something foreseeable that can be bad- if capable- is to entirely prevent its capability of the bad outcome from happening. So, for something like someone being able to hurt you, don't allow them the tools or even altogether be in situation where it's capable of them interacting with the INTJ -INTJ
The fact that I instantly thought of multiple specific anime that are good for crying either proves that Kristin understands ISFPs or I'm an ISFP meme.
As an ENFP, I always text to one of my best friends (INFP) and ask her if she's available for a call, whenever I feel hurt to the point of crying. She already knows what I mean when I do that and will immediately call me if she's not busy. Having her listening to whatever I'm feeling at the moment and letting out all my emotions helps me a lot with processing them. She's the best at keeping me company and guiding me through my feelings, I love her so much. She always stays with me until the very end, when I'm finally laughing and joking around, which might take a couple of hours. So yeah, I do feel very called out hahahahaha
Oh no, am I going to have to break out the tissues for this sketch? 😢 Edit: Not really, phew. 😅 Also, I love the INFP showing her ex's text to her plants and I was honestly expecting/hoping for the ESTP to pick up every single bottle on that cabinet. 😆 A Mario Kart tournament should be a patreon goal or something.
I'm laughing hard at the INFP skit because that's so me! Though I usually show my phone screen in front of walls, tables, and my cat whenever I'm happy (or moping around like the sad bean I am). Maybe I should try talking/ranting to plants next time🤔
As F is lower in the function stack, it becomes a lot easier to ignore. So (in my experience) it's not so often soldiering on through pain, but not realizing how hurt you are till you give yourself time to sit with the feelings. It's similar to only feeling a cut after you notice you have one. On the other hand; XSTX Types are also the types more prone to becoming bitter, controlling, and / or inconsiderate. So "soldiering on" does come with downsides if one let's it go too far.
As an ESTP, I don't really let people know me enough to be able to hurt me, and if they do succeed in hurting me then I just bottle it up inside of me until I'm alone and cry it out and never think about it ever again. Once I made the mistake of telling the person that hurt me that I'm hurt and they just kept making fun of me saying I didn't know you could get hurt (they're an INFP)
esfp: I relate heavily to the isfp one. In very stressful moments of my life or just moments where they have heavy emotions, I sit in a room by myself for like 30 minutes. I questioned my typology on this one... and then remembered the one time I went on a ROBLOX binge with my online friends for 4 hours after my break up.
ENFJ - the best way I can describe how I get hurt is that I recognize *what* hurt me, but not how much. I won't even realize something deeply upset me for days. My own feelings look blurry compared to other people's. I'm not focused on mine so when I'm forced to be I'm uncomfortable and frustrated by my lack of understanding. My gut reaction is to brush it off and convince myself that I'm not upset. I won't talk about it, I won't think about it, but I will randomly cry for "no reason" when I'm alone
Sometimes at the end of the day I don’t feel ok and I don’t know why .. then I analyse what had happened during the day then I find out it was silly tiny thing
Although I'm an INTJ, I relate to the ESTP in this one. Not because that's how I react to people hurting me, but because it's the only way I know how to satiate my inferior Se.
It's always funny the way you portray the INTP. I'm always like "I'm not sure I'm like that..." and then I think about it and "huh, yeah, I guess that is something that I do in certain ways." I find I also do the ISFJ's replay-situation-over-and-over-in-mind,-blaming-self as well since I often give others the benefit of the doubt due to being unable to really know what they were thinking, what they meant, what they thought I meant, etc. Social paralysis by hyper-analysis activate!!
As an INTJ-A I also feel hurt too, but it's a different story if I fall into the same mistake, I would feel very stupid if I don't learn from my past mistakes. And my copying mechanism usually looks back to the reality intestead of too focus on my feeling or others, so that I can see things more objectively and with an open mind, sometimes I write down what I learn from my feelings that appear that day
Amazing how she knows that being left out a group chat would be the thing that would hurt the most. And then pretending it's OK to keep the peace. Oh how I felt this!! (ENFJ)
ENFP is so accurate. My ESFJ friend always hear me when I feel sad. He listens to me even if it takes me 3 hours to vent. I am very grateful to have him in my life :))
I recognize that behavior! The INTJ has clearly had serious emotional trauma in her life. Let's unpack that as soon as she feels like she won't be emotionally burned again by telling us her story. - an INTJ
When we were moving, I put an item my wife (ESFJ) gifted me in the give away pile. The item serves no practical use and cost less than five bucks, but she was extremely upset when she found out. It is now sitting in the corner of my office somewhere and I still don't know what to do with it.
As an ISTP thats an accurate depiction of me. But sometimes, i just didnt feel hurt like it should be. Well maybe for one or 2 seconds but thats it. venting my anger by revenge in the right person who hurt me is the best punishment i could give. Although it might end up me thinking that Ive been a bad person. It just nice to let it out.
Okay before watching the video, as an INTJ, I think that if i get genuinely hurt, i’d just avoid the feelings and keep going. I’d of course eventually break down when I’m not being busy at the moment
@@NoOne-wn9ju exactly, it is between choosing productivity or temporary mental health. Bet our method of avoiding emotions for the moment isn't healthy but if not, we really don't know how to get the work done properly and being extremely unhappy at the same time... at least for me
INTJ here. Personally the ISTP one was most like me. Insults others tell me won’t resonate for weeks until it pops back in my mind. But the cacophony of self deprecating criticism in my own mind? That’ll get to me. Only I am allowed to effectively insult me, and I’m the best at it. Which is why my usual reaction to insults is, “That was pathetic. Do better.”
Intp. After spending days trying to find the solution to feelings decides it’s easier to just forget the person who hurt their feels existed in the first place.
ENFJ here and your representation is spot on! We keep our energy positive, smiles, and even trying to genuinely lift and express grateful words towards whatever happens (or person) that hurt us. It just that, beside all those supporting gesture, our eyes will never lie to you. Tips for anyone that ever wanted to be a good friend with ENFJ. Yes, we are hardly to get offended and we support you much of the time, but remember to pay attention closely to our eyes when your intuition tells you that you hurt us. It will be your intuition works, because your physical being will be already deceived by our positive gesture. And afterwards, we wouldnt want anything bad happening to you. We love people and we cant help it!
I was wondering what you were gonna do for the INFP and their crybaby reputation but the talking to plants definitely got me, very funny, maybe that’s a viable solution, I’ll keep that in mind for the next crisis I have
The number of types you share no cognitive functions are minimal. Take my type, the difference between me (ENTP) and an (INTP) is actually kinda small sometimes. And yet, other times the difference is huge. I get along well with ENFPs who can frequently follow my conversations, and yet... they are a feeling type. But we both have NE focus and SI inferior and it is actually pretty easy for them to switch between Fi and Te about as easily as I switch between my Ti and Fe. Start adding it all up and you realize you have more in common with more people than most of us realize it.
As an INTJ, even though the skit may have been somewhat satirical, it wasn’t exactly wrong either. I cannot recall any recent a recent instance in which the actions of another genuinely hurt me. Annoyed, certainly, but not hurt. That being said, one cannot help but be close to oneself, and so if there is an instance in which I may feel genuinely hurt (which is rare) it will likely stem from myself. The solution I have adopted is simply moving on, focusing on other things, until whatever it was that caused the hurt is but a distant memory, and I recognize that in the grand scheme of things it was inconsequential, and I scorn myself a little for attributing too much importance to it at the time.
INTJ- True. To offend me, I must first respect you. And if you are the type of person that tries to be offensive, I probably don't. Though... if someone purposely interferes with one of my plans - even worse, if said interference acts to their own detriment or does not benefit them - I do find that offensive. Not proud to say this, but it does trigger my revenge reflex. If you somehow managed to annoy me to such a degree that my need for revenge overcomes my laziness - that's an accomplishment. Trust this - you do not want to be the subject of an INTJ's unwavering focus. Funny enough, if said person does benefit from the interference - I kind of respect that. Anyway, I will rein this internal monologue back into my head where it belongs. :P lol
The INFJ one lol I remember when I reacted like that to a ”joke” :)) I still bring it up in therapy to this day. So yeah, it did bother me to the point of ”I will cut you” :))
Well Kristen, this is the first time I feel accurately represented as an INFJ. I can take an insult so well, but also will make excellent pies for everyone you know, except you and your family, until one day you notice and then I will coldly let you know *we were not friends since that day you threw away my pie.*
Getting hurt once and never again is basically the origin story of INTJs
Yep, pretty much.
Yes it is
so accurate
I was mistyped as INTP, INFJ and ENTJ, but the farther i went into the MBTI rabbit hole, i found out i was an INTJ, i had a wrong idea about INTJ's because of the over-glorification by the community but deep down, every INTJ is a scaredy cat who is afraid of getting hurt, anyways i am done with MBTI long ago but i still watch Kristin's vid because i enjoy them, this comment hits hard.
yep
As an INTP, the most traumatizing experience is not being able to logically deduce why you feel hurt in the first place.
You know you have demon F when you catch yourself thinking "But that doesn't make sense!" in response to someone else's feelings. Or your own.
Same as an INTJ. 💯
as an entp, I got good enough at deducing to do that 🥲
lmao I can relate soooooo much
I got into the habit of "talking" to my self as a therapist as a way of trying to resolve my emotional and personal problems
Me: why are you mad? I get the sensation i'm supposed to feel hurt.
Her: yes!
me: oh, i dOnT kNoW wHaT tO dO...
I love how it takes ISTPs a matter of weeks to realize that they were hurt by that insult, usually remembering it out of the blue. An accurate representation of my ISTP cousin! 😉
I'm an istp and can confirm your cousin is an istp too
The worst part is finding the perfect response only to remember that I was indeed days ago 😂
If it REALLY hurt me, it only takes a couple of days!
Of course, it's exaggerated for funsies, but I was genuinely surprised at how true that was, literally
- Hah, seriously? Wait, is it? Oh FFS yeah it is
For the ISTP I know, it takes months...maybe a year lbvs.
Treats me like "trash"/says mean jokes/acts like he doesn't care when I kind of can tell he does, then about once year he sends some feely message like, " why won't you let me love you?" "Or did you know you were the love of my life?" I respond later then he says, "oh that was a drunk text." Or just says, "Blah" with stone face.
As an INFP I felt truly hurt about this represantation and showed it to my hedgehog 😭
having a pet hedgehog is the most INFP thing I heard of this year
@@larsswig912 I agree, it's really infp thing😂😂😂😂😂
lol
I didn't like this representation and I went to talk to my plant about it
INTJ reaction to being genuinely hurt: Just quietly slip away, worry and ruminate about it for ages and try to distract myself with project work. If someone asks what's the matter, just say "Nothing." If they persist, snap at them. Get annoyed at self for feeling hurt and for being so weak. Listen to melancholy music. Melancholy is the word that best describes it.
Mood. Been there.
Also get angry at yourself because you didn't see it coming. Totally agree it's pure deep dark melancholy.
@@cansueceklc7745 Yeah, especially for not planning for whatever oversight caused it.
Never again.
I’m an INTP but this is pretty much me as well
Hahahahahahahaha. INFP talking and showing the chat to the plant cracked me up! Well done, Kristin!
I thought INFP was photographing the plant, but showing the chat to the plant makes sense. The plant would understand, and give its genuine reaction. Maybe this was the reason I started talking to my ex-girlfriend's cat during an upsetting break-up.
I love how ISFPs need multiple days to unwind and wallow in their sadness, and once they're finished, they'll nonchalantly never mention it again! 😅😎
As an INFJ, I wish I could be like them.
Same w/ me as an INTJ!
as an ISFP, i gotta admit, it’s pretty fun being who i am
Yea I guess the main reason is because like the internet aswell we try to figure out why we are sad hurt or upset and eal with it and try to be like hey it's okay and comfort ourselves for a while till we feel better
@@nathanreedy4380 hey just try to mybe take time for urself for a while like maybe say ur sleepy and then just chill watch whatever u enjoy and makes u happy and also try to sit with urself and ask why maybe u feel hurt like ask what hurt me was It something that happened or was said was it something earlier am I stressed about something I am hiding or suppressing I would really like to help u tbh u seem like u might need urself someone to talk to I wouldn't mind tbh it I would enjoy it and would be glad if u did reply back to me to see if it helped in anyway
The INFP footage is just prime meme material
ESTJ and ESTP killed me. ESTJ completely unaware of what is happening inside them, and ESTP going on a bender.
How is your comment 3days ago, when video posted 2min ago?
ENTPs can take the bender approach to. The worst I was ever hurt was after a death... Three days. Little sleep. Lotsa caffeine... Started hallucinating. Fell asleep for a marathon blackout. Woke up moved on.
@@jonasjasikevicius8780 They're likely connected to Kristin's Paetron, so they can see new content early.
@@trinaq oh...
@@jonasjasikevicius8780 cause he's literally a ghost, he exceeds the limits of time and space 😉
(INTJ) As much as we'd like to perpetuate this image, we do get hurt and feel it very strongly, but almost never show it to the outside world. We probably resemble the INFP more than anything else when we are hurt and get stuck in loops in our head. Personally, I feel sick to my stomach (literally) and can't focus. Whether anyone has ever seen this in action though, I'm doubtful.
INTP -I'll pretend to work or read, but really I'm just sitting there arguing with the person in my head. I doubt anyone realizes it, tho.
+@@DreamQuillRose Why didn't you just make your own comment LMAO this is completely unrelated
INTJ here and u are so right
Exactly!! And I hate it when I feel sick to my stomach and can't focus.
@@DreamQuillRose
This🥲
ISTP
That ENFP talking vs ESFP partying is so accurate! No wonder, my ENFP friend truly does call randomly at midnight to rant.
We are talkers
I was once friends with an ESFP (I'm am ENFP) and when I was hurt I just wanted to talk but they kept avoiding it and saying let's do this, let's go there... That's when we started drifting apart. The differences are subtle but they sting. Felt like we never really understood each other
Funnily enough, that is exactly what I do. I sit down, possibly for days, trying to find out a solution to how to stop feeling hurt. I once spent 3 months tirelessly chipping away at the solution to getting over an emotional crisis. And I did! - INTP
Or ignore it and it goes away.
I am more in line with the ENTP here. Memes makes me forget hurt. -INTP
3 months? Teach me, im an infp and I've been trying for years. x.x
@@Joey-rs7uq I don't know how to explain it. The first step is to figure out the reason behind the emotions, and the second step varies depending on what you find out in the first step. ~ INTP
In my experience, thinking about it only prolongs the hurt. It's fuel to the fire. If you can just accept the emotions and let them flow through you, it will quickly pass. This is not easy when you're an INTP because your mind is so active but it's still the best way.
INTJ, yup quite true....which has the unfortunate side effect of meaning that the ones who do hurt us are the ones we believed to be trustworthy and safe making hurts from them absolutely crushing if/when they occur. Those are the times you wish you were the oblivious ISTP or ESTJ.
True, and then I narrow down my circle of trust even more…
As an ISTP female, yes, I can detach from feelings quite fine, but guess what. We, or some of us, have a thing for ENFPs. As for me, I quite admire them for being able to express that supressed Fi that I have and be so confident about it so that makes me to like them more easily, even if I don't actually know them (they will anyway make themselves known pretty fast). This bubbly (quite dumb.. ) positive and friendly feeler creature.. They are so chaotic that I might follow them blindly for a while.
Anyway, it quite hurts on the spot when these people hurt me (of course, verbally).
I might actually not understand what is happening but I do feel uncomfortable and it disturbs my day/week - depends of how close I feel to that ENFP and if it was the partner, well that's worst case scenario (I recovered from such a thing in almost a year. The first 4 months were terrible).
Everyone is actually sensitive in a way but you might never find out about them.
That's... Not how being a human being works...
Personally, I hurt more like an INFP but hidden behind a poker face. I then become nauseated and get caught in mental loops.
So true. If they attempt to gaslight you as a response to you addressing how they hurt you, you fear trusting anyone again, especially if they did it for years before you figured out what they were doing to you. You then wish you were oblivious to the emotional effects of not being able to trust anyone. - one INTJ
"My friends can't hurt me, if I don't have any friends." *INTJ taps head*
The other day I was with my ISTP dad and he suddenly said: It's not fair!
I looked at him and he said: She killed the protagonist's dog and still got to be the emperor's wife, that's not fair!
About the villainess of a Chinese drama we had finished like three weeks before.
It was the cutest the funniest thing ever 😂
Im an ISTP and I can confirm I often do things like this
The INFJ hit so close to home! I have noticed that I can sometimes take jokes against me quite personally leading to a rabbit hole of thinking ‘there’s something wrong with me’. This at the time makes me want to distance myself from the people. Great video! 👏🏻👏🏻
College years are rough because guy humor at that age is the friend group roasting one another religiously.
Can’t help but feeling like people openly hate you
Same here especially when I was younger. Now I have boundaries set up so that I protect myself... and others! Gotta love the ''pun'' Kristin made using our cognitive functions. Ni Fe = NiFe🔪 😂When we're young or unhealthy we WILL use that NiFe to ''cut'' someone as deep as possible if we're at our wits end.
Really ? I feel like she usually doesn’t get the infj right
@@PippaPasses I never understood that type of humour. I'd say it's solely a bro thing, but girls do it, too. I knew two girls in high school who would roast each other and call each other the b word and they were best friends. It kinda horrified me.
I'm an INFJ, too, and I actually like that humor to some extent. My bf and I roast each other constantly, too. But it's because we don't touch topics that could hurt the other one and are quite obviously joking. Others are way less mindful or more ruthless or both. oh yes how my feelings got hurt constantly back in school 🙄
We get our feelings hurt all the time. People have regularly thought I wasn't hurt by something, or it was nbd, my whole life. I've literally said, "I'm really hurt by this" or "this is really hard for me," and they dismiss it because my tone and body language are calm. It's kinda awful, actually. -INTJ (who is old enough and healthy enough to say the things I couldn't in my 20s)
Same here. I'm realizing that I have "analysis paralysis" when it comes to figuring out how to respond to being hurt, which usually results in never expressing it or saying something brief that lacks sufficient drama for other people to take it seriously.
I *could* unleash the pent up decades of repressed hurt upon a single person who has newly hurt me, but then there would be a giant crater in the Earth to repair and a lot of questions to answer. -INTJ
Same. No one should treat you like that. Everyone has valid experiences and emotions. - one INTJ who needs therapy but can't trust others anymore
@@alicialexists I can help you- oh wait, I have trust issues as well - an INFJ with 5w6 but wing 6 is ten times dominating my overprotective personality
Or they're just not very bright. If someone says something like that I tend to believe them no matter what their body language is.
I feel you, no one takes us seriously when we feel hurt coz we always portray the most understanding friend, and that's our fault. We should express ourselves and set boundaries, but in a healthy way. Explain it so it will be understood and acknowledged and you can give the other person a chance
INTPs googling how to stop having emotions
(Finds liquior)
@@HerKnightable Funnily enough, since booze can make you feel loose as a goose. That can help you with coming up with the proper logical solutions when the emotions aren't pressing on your mind and making things irrational. lol
The ISTP part is scarily accurate lmfaoo. Then by the time you realise, you're not sure how to bring it up and you swear to yourself that you'll say something to them in the moment next time.
And then we also forget to say something in the next time. Realizing it next week, and... the loop continues
Yup, always realizing it - getting the perfect response and then remembering that it's now too late.
The trick is to just bring it up the first time even though it's been some time. It's not so bad, just be like "So I've been thinking about what you said about X, and it made me feel Y."
@@benjaminharmon6541 lol, fat chance of that happening.
@@lostcloud4368 omg yes
Polar Fi is hard, feelings go away so easily. Because of that, it doesn't get absorbed and ends up getting brushed off. I admire ISFPs for this, having the time to actually think about feelings, expand it then soak it in, allowing the self to feel that way and validating it. If I have one day to switch to a type, it'd be them.
- resident ESTP
The ISTP one is accurate. The 'feelings' only manifest in the moment as numbness or irritation and I often end up externalising them (via snarky comments or withdrawal) before even realising I was upset, let alone figuring out the reason why
I have to admit I also do the same thing as an INFJ. I can use self sarcasm and self irony to masochistic levels, but if someone else tries to hurt me psychologically I start planning the ultimate revenge
Not just ultimate, but poetic and masterfully crafted. moooood.
And in the end you only end up hurting yourself more even if your revenge succeeds. Take a book from ENFP or ESFP page and just talk to someone for once!
If someone hurts me, it's not that big of a big deal. But hurt someone i love, and I'll spend every second of every day plotting for revenge. You won't see it coming and it will be in an unconventional way.
@@firespawnie537we should from time to time. That detail is what I like about Kristin. She showed our "mirroring technique" from the perception from hers to ours. I didn't know how cute and witty we looked!
@@firespawnie537Having had an ENFP best friend for years has helped me greatly at venting negative emotions! And her too for other things, such a great combo!
As an istp, this is pretty scary true. After my break up with my ex, i realized a lot of hurting comments which she told me. While dating, i thought those were a part of the "conversation" we used to have!
Like an "argument" or some sort...
ENFP here!! the very long convo definitely ends with talking about something entirely unrelated like how everything turns into crabs or what the world would be like without money or if you'd rather have sponges for hands or never ask a question again... endless possibilities!
Can you still articulate your hands, or are they just blocks of sponge? Do they have bones in them?
Eliteee
@@coin3720 your hands are like hands, they have one joint at the knuckles and you feel pain and touch through them, you have fingers! but they are material sponge. there is a transition into your wrists.
@@melnevianza1767and the weirdest shit is our feet are so damn unnecessary complicated why tf would evolution end up in that monstrosity of a billion knuckles and bones
And everything crab
My heart SANK when I heard "oh...you're in a group chat without me". What a horrible feeling 💔 and yes I would react exactly like that. Nice job.
As an ISFP, that's exactly what I do! lol Retreat feeling deeply wounded only to reemerge as though nothing ever happened. Great video as always.
yeah and in my exp either everything is cool with whoever hurt me or i just don't really talk to them again but i'm not mad. it's pretty breezy. i laughed when she went into her room cos i knew exactly what would happen :p
Ok, INTJ here. Yeah, in most cases, that is exactly true. But sometimes, sometimes, we'll let some people close enough that they might hurt us, and oh boy, does it hurt then. In those cases, we'll go over and over what happened to figure out if we did something wrong and how to prevent it in the future - and prevent it we will! And some of us will also think of all the ways we could get some sweet revenge but never actually do anything to enact that because it's rarely worth it, and drop even those thoughts soon because keeping whoever hurt us in our minds for too long is giving them energy and time they simply don't deserve.
Yeah, when we let people in they can hurt us. Also, acting rightly and justly and being punished for it can really really hurt us also. We get hurt a lot I think, is why we lock our emotions away.... 😕
I also I dont let anyone in when I find out that I've hurt someone. I just replay the event knowing that I was the problem over and over thinking that I SHOULD have known.
Yeah as an ISFJ I do both the INTP and ISFJ methods here. I start out blaming myself for the issue for awhile, but if it takes forever to get over it I go inward and try to find a solution or figure out why it still hurts and how I can productively feel better.
Same! But I'm an INTP
Agreed!! I'm an ISFJ too!!!
I know the ENTP one is a bit of a stereotype but it’s so true 😭. I have to distract myself with entertainment- anything but facing my own emotions lol
That's very real
I went through a really bad heartbreak last year and I distracted myself with Netflix, comics and music, basically.
Anything to suppress the unpleasant emotions that I can't deal with.
On another note, I don't think that actually helps, my social anxiety has gotten worse
It's conflicting not wanting to face reality and also being self-aware at the same time-
Same here, scrolling through the comments to see a fellow ENTP relating lol. I usually do escapism, then when the feelings aren't that raw, somehow make it into a funny anecdotal story that either makes people laugh or worry about me lmao
True
Me with my firts Teen Crush. I knew he wasn't going to like me back so I saw so many movie recaps that I didn't see it as a sad time XD I think with the time I just forget it
As an ISTJ I relate, what does not kill you make you stronger
ENFP: "Do you have seven hours to talk?" YES. This is basically exactly what I did when my ESFJ friend really hurt me a while ago. I sat her down, and we talked it out. It was so good. Thanks for this, Kristin! -ENFP
EDIT: And correct me if I'm wrong, but I would presume that ENFPs would want to talk it out--most likely after they've processed it for themselves--because of their dominant Ne paired with secondary Fi, and so they would want to express their feelings through talking to their friend, whereas ESFPs would--after they've processed it themselves--want to go DO something with their friend to express how their friend hurt them because of their dominant Se and secondary Fi. And ISFPs and INFPs would most likely process their hurt alone because of their dominant Fi. And then the ISFP would move on because of their secondary Se calling them to go do something, whereas the INFP would hang on to it for longer because, due to their secondary Ne, they live in their mind. But this is all just my theory.
SECOND EDIT: I love how I originally posted something, then went about my day, thought about it in depth, came back, and edited another paragraph, then thought about THAT more, and went back to add another paragraph... and then came back to write this. XD * Ne be like *
I’m an infp. My husband is the only one I want to talk to and open my feelings to, hurt being one of them. I keep things to myself otherwise. I can act passive aggressive and cold sometimes when hurt but I’m not gonna want to talk about my feelings. When I had a cat I used to cry out to him and tell him all my problems. He carried a lot 😅
Lol if you need to talk it out anymore there's always room for a third edit
@@sarahberkner I might just take you up on that. 🤣🤣🤣 We shall see.
omg the ESTJ hahaha! Can't believe I relate. Sometimes that happens to me too. I'm like, UGH! I feel gross inside, why? And then I realize that during the previous conversation some things where said that made me feel bad, and then I completely forgot about it but the feeling lingered on. Also I can't count how many times in my life I was feeling off and I thought I was about to have a cold, but the cold never came and I realized I was having emotions!
Then the ENFP proceeded to start the conversation with the backstory behind getting hurt inserting any tangent that they decide to go on because “you will need all this for the context”, then actually properly going into it about an hour in, still going on tangents, then trying to excuse the other persons behaviour and being like “yeah but I don’t really feel like I can be mad because they are going through their own stuff, but I am still hurt by it”, and then the rest of the call is random anecdotes and exploring ideas because really the ENFP just wants to feel understood, valued and loved again after being hurt, and needs to be in their element to bring back that energy.
Oh boy. You nailed it, I think.
Didn’t expect to be called out that hard lol
INFP 7 years later: "I think I've finally healed."
I... that's... yeah. I'm _better_ at least...
You forgot the one…17 years later 😂😂
INFJ: "I have quietly been keeping track of your flaws, weaknesses, and deepest insecurities and if you cross me one more time, I will DESTROY you."
P.S. The INFP showing a picture to the plant made me laugh out loud.
ESTJ here: now around 30 I have actually started questioning a lot if I'm legitimately feeling a real feeling or just making it up because I think I'm supposed to feel things and it's a very not fun spiral to go down lmao.
And yes, I would care about forgetting to buy tomatoes. It's probably going to be very inconvenient now that whatever plans I had are derailed from the lack of tomatoes
The INTJ is definitely off today.
I'd love it if nothing ever hurt me. But I've looked after 20-something cats between the ones I've owned and the ones friends I've lived with have owned. And five dogs that I can remember. (There's a sixth that I can't). I've also buried one set of great-grandparents, two sets of grandparents, and my father just two months ago now. And that's not counting other things I've had happen to upset me.
I know we're supposed to be robots, but we're really, really not. Though I am running out of people to die on me. So there's that. But I also have a cat that I'm not confident will make it to the end of the year, and another one that could always surprise me because he's got a bad heart.
INTJs are picky about which people they get attached to. But we're also extremely loyal once we've decided. Losing someone is devastating.
My best friend is an INTJ, and I can see how much she cares about me! We talk about any random bulls*it, whether it's basic, dumb stuff or a philosophical / scientific matter, listening to each other's rant with actual pleasure! Also, whenever I'm in need she's always there: giving me rational, wise advises, arguing with third parties to defend me (I do the same to defend her, obviously), and filling me with encouraging words. She doesn't trust people easily, and I genuinely appreciate the fact that she feels safe and comfortable around me. 💕
The robot stereotype is so stupid! We're deep feelers who are passionate and imaginative and driven. Literally nothing about us is robotic lol.
Ikr? That's why i refuse to adopt a pet. I pretty much act like i don't really want one bc i don't want to tell people that I'm not having a pet bc they die.
@@arfar.m INTP here - I literally said that to a sister-in-law a few years back. "I don't really want a dog because they only live so long, and then they die." She tried to convince me that that wasn't the thing I should be focused on, but to me it's a waste of tender feelings, to finally, finally open up and love something with all my heart, and then have it die on me.
@@arfar.m I do not regret having my pets. Some live long lives. Some do not. But they would still live without me. Or possibly they would have been killed in a shelter without me. By providing a home I save lives.
And I have great companionship and love.
Funny story: I did the personality test and found out the result is ENFJ. Then I started doubting about it being right. Found this video, and sure enough the ENFJ is THE EXACT CONVERSATION I had a couple of days ago with someone from my team at work (except for the fear to group chats). Thanks for these funny bits Kristin! :)
I saw the title and thought "Bold of her to assume anyone can hurt an INTJ. I wonder how she'll portray that type"
I was not disappointed😂😂
You must be young. Even if you verify others motives, they may surprise you. Human beings are unpredictable variables in life, therefore it's best to anticipate that they may not be as they appear. This holds true for people who appear trustworthy.
@@maturitycomeswithexperienc3388 I have no idea what you're trying to tell me or how it relates to my comment
As an INTJ, I tend to be super picky about who I let get closeto me. So when someone hurts me, it is especially painful. :(
@@bhorsehappy I get it. I think we sometimes struggle to open up because we don't know how to handle the pain. I guess we're capable of so many things but aren't the best when it comes to emotions...
The ENTJ being like "I don't care!!" but "she did care" is so relatable like I do this same shit 24*7 !! 😅😅
I was like that too but I might have been an unhealthy ENTJ cause now i'll make you sit down politely let you know what's wrong with what you said how it reflected on me and worn you to never do that again, communication is a must to keep a relationship going and make it stable.
"Fair enough," is an effective conversation ender that I use often.
Even though we have the same Ti/Fe relationship, I do seem to hurt much easier than my ISTP cousins. They have an ability to shrug things off of which I am envious. Conversely, they seem (even) less aware of how their words might come across as hurtful to others.
Giving up trying to solve my feelings has been one of the longest but also one of the most worthwhile struggles of my life. As my fellow INTP over at xkcd put it: "my normal approach is useless here".
That sums it up quite well for me as well. After years of trying different solutions that involved logic, I couldn't find a solution. So, when a podcaster I liked mentioned the best way to process painful emotions was to just "let yourself feel them" I was desperate enough to try and give into the feeling madness. To my surprise, it worked, contingent upon one thing: if I let myself just feel my emotions for too long (think recurringly over the course of 2 or more days), then it started to generate more problems instead of helping, and I ended up stuck in replaying the same negative emotions over and over instead of moving past them. So, I set a rule in my mind that if I started to let myself do it long enough for me to stick myself in a loop, I would immediately stop trying to feel and try to think about something else. This is how I solve negative emotions to this day.
Also, I theorize the reason INTPs seem to get more easily hurt than ISTPs is because we have Si and can get stuck into a loop of constantly remembering moments in our lives with Si that we then try to solve with Ti.
Here I am over here as an ENFP 😭
@@lifeasjc6944 I recognize you exist, but I want to know the relevance between the above statements and your statement.
@@danielfranklin9784 ENFPs are concidered like one of the most sensitive personality types and while my ISTP friend is brushing everything off, INTPs being a bit more logical then ENFPs (or ar least me) getting hurt really hard easily
"As an INFJ" 🤣... that's totally true for me!
Outside I'm like "no problem that's ok ☺️" but inside I want to systematically destroy the person. But it's only for a few minutes, after that I'm at peace again. 🧘♀️
Interesting to see the Fe and Fi differences. High Fe pretends to others. Low Fe ignores it.
High Fi processes it and Low Fi represses it.
for me, it usually takes a couple days of processing for the real hurt to hit - ISTP - but sometimes we can be hurt right away, it's not always time-delayed - depends on who did the hurting.
Watching an ISTP slowly process that they're hurt about something that happened and gearing themselves up to talk to me about it is one of the most stressful things in the world 😅. -INFP
So true to the INTJ one, '2nd most extreme' way to handle someone or something foreseeable that can be bad- if capable- is to entirely prevent its capability of the bad outcome from happening. So, for something like someone being able to hurt you, don't allow them the tools or even altogether be in situation where it's capable of them interacting with the INTJ
-INTJ
Kristin you are such a boss with acting! You get completely different types down perfect! -From an ENFJ
I react like the ISTP at first but when I realize I’m hurt I do the ESTP coping strategy for a couple weeks.
The fact that I instantly thought of multiple specific anime that are good for crying either proves that Kristin understands ISFPs or I'm an ISFP meme.
dude
As an ENFP, I always text to one of my best friends (INFP) and ask her if she's available for a call, whenever I feel hurt to the point of crying. She already knows what I mean when I do that and will immediately call me if she's not busy. Having her listening to whatever I'm feeling at the moment and letting out all my emotions helps me a lot with processing them. She's the best at keeping me company and guiding me through my feelings, I love her so much. She always stays with me until the very end, when I'm finally laughing and joking around, which might take a couple of hours. So yeah, I do feel very called out hahahahaha
Awwn 😊
That "I think that comment hurt me" days later is so very accurate. (ISTP)
Oh no, am I going to have to break out the tissues for this sketch? 😢 Edit: Not really, phew. 😅 Also, I love the INFP showing her ex's text to her plants and I was honestly expecting/hoping for the ESTP to pick up every single bottle on that cabinet. 😆 A Mario Kart tournament should be a patreon goal or something.
I'm laughing hard at the INFP skit because that's so me! Though I usually show my phone screen in front of walls, tables, and my cat whenever I'm happy (or moping around like the sad bean I am). Maybe I should try talking/ranting to plants next time🤔
The ability to soldier on through pain is probably the thing I envy most about the XSTX types. How do you guys do it? Share with us your secrets.
As F is lower in the function stack, it becomes a lot easier to ignore. So (in my experience) it's not so often soldiering on through pain, but not realizing how hurt you are till you give yourself time to sit with the feelings. It's similar to only feeling a cut after you notice you have one. On the other hand; XSTX Types are also the types more prone to becoming bitter, controlling, and / or inconsiderate. So "soldiering on" does come with downsides if one let's it go too far.
For me it's mainly not noticing it at all or realizing it much later on randomly.
Inferior opinions do not affect superior brings
-istp
It is like that for a while, but they will eventually succumb
As an ESTP, I don't really let people know me enough to be able to hurt me, and if they do succeed in hurting me then I just bottle it up inside of me until I'm alone and cry it out and never think about it ever again. Once I made the mistake of telling the person that hurt me that I'm hurt and they just kept making fun of me saying I didn't know you could get hurt (they're an INFP)
esfp:
I relate heavily to the isfp one. In very stressful moments of my life or just moments where they have heavy emotions, I sit in a room by myself for like 30 minutes. I questioned my typology on this one...
and then remembered the one time I went on a ROBLOX binge with my online friends for 4 hours after my break up.
ENFJ - the best way I can describe how I get hurt is that I recognize *what* hurt me, but not how much. I won't even realize something deeply upset me for days. My own feelings look blurry compared to other people's. I'm not focused on mine so when I'm forced to be I'm uncomfortable and frustrated by my lack of understanding. My gut reaction is to brush it off and convince myself that I'm not upset. I won't talk about it, I won't think about it, but I will randomly cry for "no reason" when I'm alone
ISTP: ... I'm legitimately impressed that you're able to so accurately imitate other's reactions
As an INTJ, I often think there's really not much left of me to *be* hurt. At 33 I'm a walking, working, time-killing corpse.
The fact is that I always try to find solutions to my emotional problems by writing pages upon pages full of logical essays.
INTP
Can you explain this process? What do you write?
As ISTP, it usually takes only few hours for the "hurt" to sink. But sometimes it goes for months, yea.
ENTP is spot on 😂😂 I do the same except i do that while I’m drinking
As an INTP, at least half the time, I don't know I was hurt by something until at least a few days later
Sometimes at the end of the day I don’t feel ok and I don’t know why .. then I analyse what had happened during the day then I find out it was silly tiny thing
Oh goodness the ENTP one. I soon scrolled memes for years before understanding. Sheesh that cut deep, so true, so good.
Although I'm an INTJ, I relate to the ESTP in this one. Not because that's how I react to people hurting me, but because it's the only way I know how to satiate my inferior Se.
I'm an INTJ and I totally agree
It's always funny the way you portray the INTP. I'm always like "I'm not sure I'm like that..." and then I think about it and "huh, yeah, I guess that is something that I do in certain ways." I find I also do the ISFJ's replay-situation-over-and-over-in-mind,-blaming-self as well since I often give others the benefit of the doubt due to being unable to really know what they were thinking, what they meant, what they thought I meant, etc.
Social paralysis by hyper-analysis activate!!
ISTP: Dumb feeling coming back to haunt us after the time to do something is GONE!!
Say what you will, I was amused at the milk reference for the ISTP 😂
As an INTJ-A I also feel hurt too, but it's a different story if I fall into the same mistake, I would feel very stupid if I don't learn from my past mistakes. And my copying mechanism usually looks back to the reality intestead of too focus on my feeling or others, so that I can see things more objectively and with an open mind, sometimes I write down what I learn from my feelings that appear that day
The ISTP absolutely cracked me up
Amazing how she knows that being left out a group chat would be the thing that would hurt the most. And then pretending it's OK to keep the peace. Oh how I felt this!! (ENFJ)
As an ENFP originally mistyped as an ESFP, that difference is so real LOL
I don’t know how you do it but I have experienced that exact thing as an ISTP literally down to the “fair enough”
ENFP is so accurate. My ESFJ friend always hear me when I feel sad. He listens to me even if it takes me 3 hours to vent. I am very grateful to have him in my life :))
The ESTP just casually grabbing bottle after bottle had me rolling 🤣
I recognize that behavior! The INTJ has clearly had serious emotional trauma in her life. Let's unpack that as soon as she feels like she won't be emotionally burned again by telling us her story. - an INTJ
When we were moving, I put an item my wife (ESFJ) gifted me in the give away pile. The item serves no practical use and cost less than five bucks, but she was extremely upset when she found out. It is now sitting in the corner of my office somewhere and I still don't know what to do with it.
Now I am curious what it is
As an ISTP thats an accurate depiction of me. But sometimes, i just didnt feel hurt like it should be. Well maybe for one or 2 seconds but thats it.
venting my anger by revenge in the right person who hurt me is the best punishment i could give.
Although it might end up me thinking that Ive been a bad person. It just nice to let it out.
As an INTP, I relate to my type, the ENTP, the ENTJ, the ISTJ, and the ISTP. I also kind of relate to the INTJ and ISFP.
Okay before watching the video, as an INTJ, I think that if i get genuinely hurt, i’d just avoid the feelings and keep going. I’d of course eventually break down when I’m not being busy at the moment
LMAOO I was not expecting that
Seems like something most TJs do(I do the same thing).
Ah, I see the trick here: You just never stop being busy.
-Every Te Dom
@@NoOne-wn9ju exactly, it is between choosing productivity or temporary mental health. Bet our method of avoiding emotions for the moment isn't healthy but if not, we really don't know how to get the work done properly and being extremely unhappy at the same time... at least for me
INTJ here. Personally the ISTP one was most like me. Insults others tell me won’t resonate for weeks until it pops back in my mind. But the cacophony of self deprecating criticism in my own mind? That’ll get to me. Only I am allowed to effectively insult me, and I’m the best at it. Which is why my usual reaction to insults is, “That was pathetic. Do better.”
I am an ISTP and I resonate with the last bit
The ISFP's feelings are on display in the mural she drew, in fluorescent crayon, on the wall during her three days of seclusion.
ISTJ - yep, its not efficient to dwell on these things, so we keep going.... but yes we have emotion, and it does hurt.
I hope you didn't accidentally drop any of those bottles when rehearsing that ESTP scene!
Intp. After spending days trying to find the solution to feelings decides it’s easier to just forget the person who hurt their feels existed in the first place.
isfp is so accurate 😭😭 i always isolate myself in my room when I get disappointed or hurt by someone
ENFJ here and your representation is spot on!
We keep our energy positive, smiles, and even trying to genuinely lift and express grateful words towards whatever happens (or person) that hurt us. It just that, beside all those supporting gesture, our eyes will never lie to you.
Tips for anyone that ever wanted to be a good friend with ENFJ. Yes, we are hardly to get offended and we support you much of the time, but remember to pay attention closely to our eyes when your intuition tells you that you hurt us. It will be your intuition works, because your physical being will be already deceived by our positive gesture.
And afterwards, we wouldnt want anything bad happening to you. We love people and we cant help it!
INTP finally saying fewer words than ISTP
ISTP here. Pretty accurate! I might not ever notice.
As an ISTP, with a lack of Fi. It is very difficult to know why we feel the way we feel 😂 I just feel it and it's annoying.
I was wondering what you were gonna do for the INFP and their crybaby reputation but the talking to plants definitely got me, very funny, maybe that’s a viable solution, I’ll keep that in mind for the next crisis I have
Straight off the bat hearing the INFJ reply was like “Yep, pressing like for this one”! 👌
That moment when you relate to 8 types out of 16
The number of types you share no cognitive functions are minimal. Take my type, the difference between me (ENTP) and an (INTP) is actually kinda small sometimes. And yet, other times the difference is huge. I get along well with ENFPs who can frequently follow my conversations, and yet... they are a feeling type. But we both have NE focus and SI inferior and it is actually pretty easy for them to switch between Fi and Te about as easily as I switch between my Ti and Fe. Start adding it all up and you realize you have more in common with more people than most of us realize it.
You don't need a psychologist you need an exorcist...
As an INTJ, even though the skit may have been somewhat satirical, it wasn’t exactly wrong either. I cannot recall any recent a recent instance in which the actions of another genuinely hurt me. Annoyed, certainly, but not hurt. That being said, one cannot help but be close to oneself, and so if there is an instance in which I may feel genuinely hurt (which is rare) it will likely stem from myself. The solution I have adopted is simply moving on, focusing on other things, until whatever it was that caused the hurt is but a distant memory, and I recognize that in the grand scheme of things it was inconsequential, and I scorn myself a little for attributing too much importance to it at the time.
This video was in my recommended. I didn’t watch, but I clicked to see what you’d commented. I like the consistency of getting what I expect.
INTJ- True. To offend me, I must first respect you. And if you are the type of person that tries to be offensive, I probably don't. Though... if someone purposely interferes with one of my plans - even worse, if said interference acts to their own detriment or does not benefit them - I do find that offensive. Not proud to say this, but it does trigger my revenge reflex. If you somehow managed to annoy me to such a degree that my need for revenge overcomes my laziness - that's an accomplishment. Trust this - you do not want to be the subject of an INTJ's unwavering focus. Funny enough, if said person does benefit from the interference - I kind of respect that. Anyway, I will rein this internal monologue back into my head where it belongs. :P lol
As an INFP, this is too accurate XD. I loved the part where you were talking to the plant LOL
The INFJ one lol I remember when I reacted like that to a ”joke” :)) I still bring it up in therapy to this day. So yeah, it did bother me to the point of ”I will cut you” :))
Well Kristen, this is the first time I feel accurately represented as an INFJ. I can take an insult so well, but also will make excellent pies for everyone you know, except you and your family, until one day you notice and then I will coldly let you know *we were not friends since that day you threw away my pie.*
True, exactly like that.
That...was a beautifully put plot of revenge
-infj
The INTJ distance is a barrier to stop themself from being at the mercy of anyone else. I know from personal experience.
Stop it, you're not supposed to know that we actually care.
Love, ENTJ
ENFP here who gets by due to their ISFJ's loving kindness when hurt! ISFJs are the unsung Hero's of the MBTI!!!!