Healing from Toxic Relationships and Abuse - You Don’t Have to Go to War to Get PTSD

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 25 ต.ค. 2024

ความคิดเห็น • 60

  • @MarieAK
    @MarieAK 13 วันที่ผ่านมา +3

    The only reason I made it out of my domestic violent relationship safely is because they crashed and totaled their car on their way to stop me. They had to be physically prevented from reaching me. God truly looks out for you, but healing with that information and trusting someone enough to date after is the hardest thing I have ever done. I pray survivors attract and find the most patient partners because we truly deserve to be handled with such gentleness and care

  • @mackenziehauger1642
    @mackenziehauger1642 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

    Thank u for this . I cried watching. 26 out of a dv relationship. Left everything. Restarted. It was a valley of the shadow of death. I was a lucky one

  • @KellysMagicalRealm
    @KellysMagicalRealm ปีที่แล้ว +28

    Thanks for this! Your right it’s not always easy to see abuse. Now a day with these twin flames and soul mate names we confuse it with toxic trauma bonds. I am changing my diet, yoga and trying to focus more on myself. I have been watching videos about detachment. I love how you said shift our minds to the present moment!

  • @Colleen858
    @Colleen858 ปีที่แล้ว +35

    I was in an abusive marriage for 16 years and finally woke up one day and told myself I would rather be dead than to live like that. I had a 11 year old and a two year old. He fought me all the way through but in the end I was safe. It was the most difficult thing I had to go through in my life and still suffer from anxiety.

  • @TicTacYo100
    @TicTacYo100 17 วันที่ผ่านมา +5

    She keeps pulling me back in and I can't get away, my mind keeps getting pulled back to her... feeling like she's the only person who will ever love me, who ever could love someone like me.

    • @Psalms1211-8
      @Psalms1211-8 14 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

      Same I love her I want the best for us both

    • @TicTacYo100
      @TicTacYo100 14 วันที่ผ่านมา

      @Psalms1211-8 that's the best thing you can hope for in relationships like this. A lot of the time the impetuous of one person's well being is put on the other, but as a famous Antlers song said about toxic relationship, "That burdens not on you, some patients can't be saved"

    • @gillianford9208
      @gillianford9208 11 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

      My heart goes out to you and I pray that you're filled with peace

  • @karanrajeshpallikere781
    @karanrajeshpallikere781 3 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

    I was abused when I was growing up especially during teenage years by school mates and teachers... I had to go through a lot of bullying and humiliation until one fine day there were no more in my life... It has been more than 13 years since they have left my life but their faces still haunt me the same as it was 13 years ago..... I am still struggling let go of those people in my life.... Help needed

  • @curiousrooster
    @curiousrooster 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +19

    Needed to see this tonight. An hour ago I had that conversation with my wife that it’s time to end this toxic relationship
    I have been suffering for 10 years, and after serious self exploration thanks to psychedelics I finally found clarity and bravery to act.
    What complicates things is I am also an adoptee. I am scared but also optimistic, I already integrate things you speak of just to exist, but now I am ready to find and hug the inner child, the real me.
    Thank you❤️
    Edit: 25 year marriage, 10+ yrs of toxic hell

  • @GodsBlessing-b5s
    @GodsBlessing-b5s 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

    I was in an abusive relationship and my ex screamed anger and blamed me for everything it tore me down I gave her a place to stay thought it would help, it just made things worst she wanted me to chase her and be intimate even though i was discussed at the situation I had enough so I finally left, after she got physical and started breaking things and hitting mental and physical abuse is real, it almost cost me my life she would threaten me and I started self destructing blinded wanted to feel, its been a month and I think I have PTSD from it sleepless nights, I'm also 1 month sober.. getting my energy back and self caring by avoiding all the people and mutual friends just got rid of everyone, we are not alone ❤

  • @hunnybSue
    @hunnybSue 4 วันที่ผ่านมา +2

    I was in an abusive marriage for over 20 years. I've been divorced for almost 4. I'm still struggling

  • @suzanneslaw2562
    @suzanneslaw2562 ปีที่แล้ว +19

    Thank you so much, Todd, for sharing this. I'm a survivor of such a relationship, and yes PTSD, in my case C - PTSD, is very real in the aftermath of an abusive relationship. Each day is a healing process and the further in the past this experience gets, you're so right in saying the perspective shifts. The true healing began when I began to forgive, and now I look at that experience as one of the greatest experiences my soul could have ever orchestrated for me on my path forward. Namaste ❤️ 🙏 and thank you.

    • @daisychain914
      @daisychain914 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

      This gives me hope thank you. God bless you

  • @Bhaktihihaishakti
    @Bhaktihihaishakti วันที่ผ่านมา +1

    I was also in a relationship with a toxic person....and it's mentally destroyed me, I purely honestly loved him and his behaviour was so confusing at one time he act like he loves me and instant he react like i m the most hateable person for him. He abused me alot even he threat me he will kill me whenever he see me by mistake 😢......after 2 years of relationship he said he was just experiencing and discovering about girls and now he want to marry someone else girl.....i chased him alot 😢 I don't know why i lost my self respect just to want his love back like we first met 😢.....i m so disturbed about my emotional and mentally health.....

  • @philkilcommon5554
    @philkilcommon5554 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +9

    I feel totally stuck. I've been through prolonged domestic violence. I'm over six years free after relocating, but after being assaulted literally countless times, even having to go to A&E on one occasion, after a particularly horrendous night, I'm still having flashbacks, breaking down in floods of tears on a regular. It's like the trauma is hardwired into my head now. I also have M.E and Fibromyalgia.

    • @lucindabolinger6360
      @lucindabolinger6360 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Very sorry. If you are in the US, your state probably has a domestic violence agency with resources.

  • @rajasoumyajit
    @rajasoumyajit 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    Thank You for this video. With 6 years of Toxic Abusive Relationship and Abuse to Forget.Healing since 3 months

    • @GodsBlessing-b5s
      @GodsBlessing-b5s 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

      We got this stay strong 💪 only love you need is yourself

  • @donnawoodford8145
    @donnawoodford8145 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Todd, you're right. You don't have to be in war to have battle scars, visible or invisible to others. Unfortunately, by extension, you can be a family member of someone who is deployed, returns and mistreats you. Yes, there can be manipulation, dishonesty, and other toxic behaviors which can leave the military spouse or child confused and depressed. TY for recognizing that the real battle znd pain may be at home.

  • @HowaboutnowBenson
    @HowaboutnowBenson 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    I was in an abusive relationship with my partner of two years,
    I felt everything in this video and i didnt know who i was
    Now I'm scared to trust any relationship. I'm healing myself and i found God, I'm a lot more happy now but i still have flashbacks from those two years, it's been at least a week since I went away

    • @sulutinielu
      @sulutinielu 26 วันที่ผ่านมา

      That’s good be strong don’t let it become 10 years

  • @lunamia8
    @lunamia8 14 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Thank you 🙏 this is so beautiful 😍 and your voice is so calming and perfect for this topic it’s very healing itself 💚 I grew up in a very abusive family environment, I got sexually abused etc and of course with all these traumas I attracted more abusive people into my life until the day I claimed my worth and said NO MORE. I have never looked back since and I am on my healing journey doing the work every day and learning to fully love myself 💖

  • @Thetimeisntcomingback
    @Thetimeisntcomingback หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    I was in a marriage and relationship for 12 years. Very toxic. Very abusive. It’s not even been two years since my divorce. I don’t have support. No friends. No family. I try to love myself, but it is very hard.

    • @Andreou4-u1l
      @Andreou4-u1l 16 วันที่ผ่านมา +2

      It's not much for me to say but- I'm proud of ya. I hope you found love for yourself, and I hope you continue to search for support. You're a brave soul.

  • @sabinamock4799
    @sabinamock4799 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I love your short videos they are full of practical and positive messages. Thank you.

  • @faridabedrabbo1544
    @faridabedrabbo1544 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Just in Time! Thanks my brother from Lima Perú ❤

  • @TaritaChester
    @TaritaChester 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    Your a legend mate! I tell you why before I want he'd ur video blog I was very scared where my mind body and spirit I side my body I long and truely lived for after 4 years of trauma having to listen to you and hear from someone else no one ever told me when I was well before trauma if in life I was on track or no one never ever complimented as a women and single mother to 5 beautiful children when I worked for years no one complimented for it not once even tho I worked at a very young I knew then and now and how to heal was to think what was reality is telling me with your video guidence and listening to you. Not excepting PTSD or trauma is who you are as a person when knowing I felt to heal was my body is still adjusting by trauma back in 2021 incident letting exceptance and say I won't let that define me of what happened putting myself down like abuser say to me I had become what I hated in life that's is not I wanted to feel everyday and to stop thinking like abuser!

    • @Xodileen_bell1234
      @Xodileen_bell1234 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Same. The hardest part was to not think the way abuser think. 😢 i normalized their way of thingking for some reason. And it's bad

  • @Quartzone6145
    @Quartzone6145 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I needed to hear this

  • @JenniferEmbrey
    @JenniferEmbrey หลายเดือนก่อน

    Thank you for this I was spiraling before I watched your video now I’m able to breathe and I can start focusing on a task now ❤

  • @marionbooth8103
    @marionbooth8103 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Thank you Todd.❤

  • @palmamingozzi5736
    @palmamingozzi5736 14 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Thank you.

  • @patriciadennison3142
    @patriciadennison3142 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Very helpful
    . Thank you so much! ❤️

  • @amberv4223
    @amberv4223 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    I have ptsd. I was abused as a child from birth for all my life by a narc mother.

    • @ToddPerelmuter
      @ToddPerelmuter  ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Much love and thank you for sharing

    • @katarzynalindner594
      @katarzynalindner594 ปีที่แล้ว

      Love Amber. Move as far as you can. YOU DESERVE a LIFE❤️

    • @GodsBlessing-b5s
      @GodsBlessing-b5s 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

      You are worth love , you are complete and deserve no less then positivity we all can get threw this, spiritually or not having peace of mind is everything

  • @sulutinielu
    @sulutinielu 26 วันที่ผ่านมา

    I was trying to heal till I got to Melton and feel very isolated and now I’m suffering something different 😢 I don’t think people believe suffered a violent pass they think I’m using the system, I’m suffering it even more, I wish I could exercise, I got charged in LD and paying a debt I’m bullied in this area and made to feel more isolated.so I can’t really exercise as I feel uncomfortable unwanted and bullied

  • @Wolfberry2014
    @Wolfberry2014 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I'm still struggling to break away from it... 18years, perhaps it's too late and I should just wait here

    • @jh9912
      @jh9912 19 วันที่ผ่านมา

      It is never too late ❤ Don't lose hope 🙏 I left after 10 years.

  • @karinodendaal5277
    @karinodendaal5277 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Love ur videos.

  • @bsyh1
    @bsyh1 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    Thank you❤

  • @sulutinielu
    @sulutinielu 26 วันที่ผ่านมา

    People are not dumb they’re heartless

  • @adikeys
    @adikeys ปีที่แล้ว

    Gratitude ❤

  • @peace3885
    @peace3885 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank you

  • @Awaken_744
    @Awaken_744 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank u!❤

  • @jomamasuks2573
    @jomamasuks2573 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    My Problem is that I can’t let him go. He is now in Jail but i still see the good in him and miss him. He’s good deep down, he was just heavily abused his whole life, he always had it hard. It’s so hard to get over it. Does somebody know how to get over it? I could really use some help

    • @x.cryptic.x4605
      @x.cryptic.x4605 27 วันที่ผ่านมา

      A person having a hard life is not an excuse for them to give someone else a hard life, many people are abused most of them don’t turn into abusers. Time is precious and life is short don’t waste either waiting for someone to change

    • @jh9912
      @jh9912 19 วันที่ผ่านมา

      Look into trauma Bond. You may be in one.

  • @ijeomalove7448
    @ijeomalove7448 8 วันที่ผ่านมา

    No time is late, my is 21 yrs. Free urself from bondage

  • @sulutinielu
    @sulutinielu 26 วันที่ผ่านมา

    I’m only here for my family and then I’ll leave to Nz for good and I cannot wait I refuse to stay here

  • @AmyOlivia-s6q
    @AmyOlivia-s6q หลายเดือนก่อน

    I just got out of domestic violence just today.I’m so lucky that I was alive.My body is still scared and I don’t know when can I happy again.
    All this start because I don’t want to do only fan video on porn site and he forced me to do it
    I ran away three times and now this time I really escaped….
    I want to feel happy again really bad

  • @JaredJacobsonLaw
    @JaredJacobsonLaw ปีที่แล้ว

    Thank u

  • @mohdnazirmohdnainar5992
    @mohdnazirmohdnainar5992 ปีที่แล้ว

    dear todd .. i am just wondering .. if you are an INFJ .. please reply .. tq

  • @theangusschmaloer
    @theangusschmaloer 6 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I love you

  • @sarahwalker5231
    @sarahwalker5231 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Mine was mutually abusive but just as damaging