Take this example I heard. Ask some one out for dinner. Get a no. Did you have someone to go dinner before you asked? No, and not after either. In reality nothing actually changed.
It really does all come down to mindset. I took something heard about anxiety to heart. The way your body feels when anxious is the same way it feels when you are excited. Now, all you have to do is convince your mind that you are not nervous, but rather excited. You body feels the same way, but now your confidence level changes, and you can conquer the world!😎
Tip List Summary 1. Detach your self worth from the outcome of the meeting. 2. Meeting is a two way street. (the other person is just as nervous as you are) 3. Do research on the other person. Sometimes (Get a gist of who they are or what they like doing) 4. Practice visualization of a successful meeting. 5. You don't look as nervous as you feel. 6. Take deeper and slower breaths before going into interaction. 7. Let the other person do the talking. "An interested person is an interesting person"
Thank you for this. I just got back from a house warming party tonight and watched your video before going. I'm really glad that I went because normally I would've lied and told them that I have something to do because I'm a coward when it comes to parties. I ended up having a fun time and had a story to tell because I forgot to bring the donuts that I bought as a house warming gift, so I re-ordered them once I got there.
I'm generally pretty good at letting my fear go and relaxing around new people. I'm currently going on dates regularly (bc lonely lol) and it's helped a lot. If you radiate self confidence they'll instantly like you more. What I've also found helpful is that I know a little about almost everything that could come up in a first time meeting, so the other person feels like I can relate to some degree but they can still impress me with their expertise on the subject. I don't pretend like I know everything, don't be that guy.
Tip#1 is the most important of all these tips imo. I used to be a nervous socially awkward wrek until I decided to be confident and ignore what i may think of the convo after it's finished. Here's a tip to trick yourself into being confident: start off with a good, strong handshake. works wonders
Hello from Russia, Thomas ! Your videos give me an opportunity to really improve my listening skills, thanks ) And topic of the video helped too, you’re amazing!
Thomas I wish I found your videos years ago. You are a great life-guide. All of your videos seem to address many obstacles I am currently facing. Thank you.
I'm 48 and think everyone I talk to just deals with me because they want something and don't really even care anything at all about me. I don't have an issue public speaking because I don't care, but when it's one on one I struggle. I've recently made a point to put myself in uncomfortable situations and try to make it through. It's a struggle.
Thank you Thomas! I really needed this as my studies in university begin next month and I'm quite nervous about it - not about the studies but about the new people and whether I'll make new friends or just freeze when anxiety hits me.
hi , i'm an 18 year old bisexual girl who is currently in a relationship with another girl. before covid was a thing everything was going great and i saw her everyday but as soon as quarantine started and we couldn't see each other anymore i developed very bad anxiety to the point where whenever she says she wants to see me i get very anxious and have panic attacks in which most of the times i throw up because that's how my body reacts to stress, and guess what? i have phobia of throwing up as well so that's not fun at all . i actually tried taking a break from the relationship this past summer in hopes of getting better but not being in a relationship with her made it even worse because i truly love her beyond imagination and i cannot imagine my life without her so i'm trying to overcome this meaningless anxiety and panic whenever my girlfriend texts me or wants to see me because i love her so so so much ( and no the anxiety is not because i'm scared of catching covid , i honestly have no clue what it is , i'm assuming its some sort of social anxiety ) anyways , i would be more than happy to hear anyone's advice or opinion on my situation , thank you for your time.
Been watching your vids over the years, even starting off I could tell you had good potential. It's cool to see how much you've grown, and improved man. Always valuable info, applicable, and not stale.. I do miss the llamas though LOL Vids have been such an awesome help throughout the years.
Thomas, you could start a serie of videos talking about your progress in something you started, for example, start to learn a new language and show to us how to commit and don't quit, just a suggestion, regardings from Brasil !
3. Do research on the other person. Sometimes (Get a gist of who they are or what they like doing) right so taking pictures of them changing through their bedroom window or do you mean looking into their college field their studying
When trying to talk to new people, it often helps to have a routine in place, especially if you wanna talk to the other gender(s). I often fall back to simple magic tricks to start with and then a really fun imagination exercise called the cube that helps you talk about things like identitiy, ambition, relationship and fears all at one go! Smiling is very useful!!
All the tips : #1. - Get out of the rejection. -My self-worth is not being affected by thr rejection. #2. The meeting is a two-way street. - The people will feel the same as you feel. #3. Try to research on the people . #4. Make a saying that you will win. #5. I look as nervous as I feel. #6.Breath deep and slow before the conversation. #7. Do the listening , let the person do the taking. #8. An interested people is an interesting people.
Whenever I get nervous I hum or laugh ,I tap my foot, I try to keep away from the person that makes me nervous but doesn't always work . I have learning difference where I have trouble looking people in the eye
What always helps me, is to try acomplish my goals with the other people, my goals in general that i chase in my life, for instance, y use to say everything that appears in my mine with the potential to help the other person, to be more happy and be less miserable, or less ignorant,, like a joke, or like a good habit, or a interesting fact, i also crticate their ideas with respect and emphaty so they don't feel bad, i also do questions about the other person's life, because know that is more confortable that don't, and like that, i never use to have awkward conversations. I hope be helpful, remember, think about your goals and go for it
There was a guy wearing a shirt of a band I like on the last day of school before winter break, my friends helped me find him on Instagram so I started talking to him a couple days ago, I go back to school tomorrow and I’m so nervous to have to actually talk to him in real life aaaa
Regarding the last point, would you consider the possibility of appearing less interesting and more like a know-it-all, when you have a wider range of topics with a moderate understanding of? I have received that feedback on several occasions and would love to hear your opinion (I wouldn't consider myself smug, but then again, self-evaluation is rarely objective)
I was once rejected by my crush, wich was hard, but at least i tried and after that i can tell you, talking to girls i so so much easier as before. The time after that i met a girl who i thought was out of my league but it worked out :) that rule is definitely true.
i just met new people in a discord server today and i was awkward as HELL like they’d compliment me or something and i’d say stuff like “nah i hate myself” or something please 😭 it was so embarrassing. they said i sounded nice and i told them i have social anxiety but it was still so fvcking awkward oh my god
Thnks 4 all your videos. I alwys go back to them as I need. Thnku 4 all ur hard work n research.! (I dont understd hw ppl Thumbs down such helpful videos).
Get fit and dress well with hygiene. As shallow as it sounds its amazing how our current body state has such an impact on our confidence as well as charisma
Know the chemistry of yours and quality investment on self and even out from comfort zone. Even the social environment and adopt it by know it proactive way
"Rejection doesn't matter in the long run"
My social anxiety: Seems fake but ok
so true
Hahaha same
It is so hard to think rationally when you start getting anxious but with practice, you can definitely improve your skills.
Take this example I heard.
Ask some one out for dinner.
Get a no.
Did you have someone to go dinner before you asked?
No, and not after either.
In reality nothing actually changed.
@@MissVasques Not bad😯
“Let the other person do most of the talking”
Two people who saw this same video:
👁👄👁 👁👄👁
Very true
0_0
😂😂😂
It really does all come down to mindset. I took something heard about anxiety to heart. The way your body feels when anxious is the same way it feels when you are excited. Now, all you have to do is convince your mind that you are not nervous, but rather excited. You body feels the same way, but now your confidence level changes, and you can conquer the world!😎
Amazing tip!
I love you I’m gonna try this
Tip List Summary
1. Detach your self worth from the outcome of the meeting.
2. Meeting is a two way street. (the other person is just as nervous as you are)
3. Do research on the other person. Sometimes (Get a gist of who they are or what they like doing)
4. Practice visualization of a successful meeting.
5. You don't look as nervous as you feel.
6. Take deeper and slower breaths before going into interaction.
7. Let the other person do the talking.
"An interested person is an interesting person"
Thanks a lot! :)
Peter Nguyen * Let the OTTER do the talking.
But I do look as nervous as I feel! I've had many people comment on it 😅
*We are all just people. Be yourself as this is the most rewarding lifestyle.*
Fixing my posture and body language helps me calm my nerves when meeting new people
This is a long term benefit of going to the gym. Short term being that you are generally more relaxed and loose.
Until I start overthinking my posture and body language and worrying about them noticing me adjusting it awkwardly and that sends me on a spiral 😅
@@snoozyq9576 omg yes I DO THE SAME:( does anyone know any simple tips for body language in these situations? like really simple ones haha
Usually in these situations, we tend to overthink. It's so important to relax and let that be represented in our body language!
Anxiety doesn't just walk away, but mindset is something , great content!
*_Tony robbins always talks about how changing your physical body helps change your mental state as well_*
I find you in every self improvement channel comments section
Some people are of the opinion that it is the other way around
Not me searching this up before I go out...
Thank you for this. I just got back from a house warming party tonight and watched your video before going. I'm really glad that I went because normally I would've lied and told them that I have something to do because I'm a coward when it comes to parties. I ended up having a fun time and had a story to tell because I forgot to bring the donuts that I bought as a house warming gift, so I re-ordered them once I got there.
This came right before me meeting a childhood friend I haven't seen in a decade. Thanks for this timing man seriously.
My face literally tells everything I’m feeling, I DO look as nervous as I feel, people always know when I’m nervous, ITS THE WORST
Letting the other person do the talking is a great one. People love talking about themselves and it lets you get to know them better!
me: I'm an awesome person
my anxiety: No Ron.
This video is so good especially for introverts :)
I'm generally pretty good at letting my fear go and relaxing around new people. I'm currently going on dates regularly (bc lonely lol) and it's helped a lot. If you radiate self confidence they'll instantly like you more.
What I've also found helpful is that I know a little about almost everything that could come up in a first time meeting, so the other person feels like I can relate to some degree but they can still impress me with their expertise on the subject. I don't pretend like I know everything, don't be that guy.
Tip#1 is the most important of all these tips imo. I used to be a nervous socially awkward wrek until I decided to be confident and ignore what i may think of the convo after it's finished. Here's a tip to trick yourself into being confident: start off with a good, strong handshake. works wonders
You've achieve the ideal beard length to hairstyle length ratio for your face here. And great video too!
THANK YOU VERY MUCH THOMAS!!! This is just uploaded right on time. I have an in person job interview tomorrow and I needed this.
Christian A. Good Luck!
Good Luck !
Thanks to all!
How is things mate?
I swear to god Thomes, you can read my mind. Video come right in my time of need, thank you.
Yup, same here! Such a lifesaver haha!
I find that if you treat people the way you want to be treated it will be easier to build better relationships.
Straight to the point, great communicator, and got my attention, that kinda of speakers I like to listen to.
Thank you for this great video
Hello from Russia, Thomas ! Your videos give me an opportunity to really improve my listening skills, thanks )
And topic of the video helped too, you’re amazing!
It's all about improving your skills every day on this self development journey we call life.
Loving the new transitions😂❤️
This video is exacly what I needed to hear today!!!
that was a CLEAN ad transition
I SWEAR I WAS SEARCHING FOR THIS ON TH-cam TODAY
Maybe he did research on your and knew what video you wanted to see...
golden tip: take two shots of vodka and go with the flow. calmness will be increased by 37%
This tip can be applied in all areas of life 😂😂😂
A 37% increase on f**k all, is f**k all
That’s also how you become an alcoholic
@@roughryder5 literally what happened to me a few years back 😅
@Mrnjau Yeah, it's called Atheism. Really sets you free
Dude! I love the style of your videos, they keep me really engaged
Thomas I wish I found your videos years ago. You are a great life-guide. All of your videos seem to address many obstacles I am currently facing. Thank you.
I don't know where I would be without this channel. 😎 best content out there.
I'm 48 and think everyone I talk to just deals with me because they want something and don't really even care anything at all about me. I don't have an issue public speaking because I don't care, but when it's one on one I struggle. I've recently made a point to put myself in uncomfortable situations and try to make it through. It's a struggle.
Thank you Thomas! I really needed this as my studies in university begin next month and I'm quite nervous about it - not about the studies but about the new people and whether I'll make new friends or just freeze when anxiety hits me.
How did it go for you?
"I like this typo and I refuse to remove it" 😂😂😂
hi , i'm an 18 year old bisexual girl who is currently in a relationship with another girl. before covid was a thing everything was going great and i saw her everyday but as soon as quarantine started and we couldn't see each other anymore i developed very bad anxiety to the point where whenever she says she wants to see me i get very anxious and have panic attacks in which most of the times i throw up because that's how my body reacts to stress, and guess what? i have phobia of throwing up as well so that's not fun at all . i actually tried taking a break from the relationship this past summer in hopes of getting better but not being in a relationship with her made it even worse because i truly love her beyond imagination and i cannot imagine my life without her so i'm trying to overcome this meaningless anxiety and panic whenever my girlfriend texts me or wants to see me because i love her so so so much ( and no the anxiety is not because i'm scared of catching covid , i honestly have no clue what it is , i'm assuming its some sort of social anxiety ) anyways , i would be more than happy to hear anyone's advice or opinion on my situation , thank you for your time.
2:52 I love your B roll 😂😂😂😂
I always smile when I'm nervous to prevent me from panicking
Been watching your vids over the years, even starting off I could tell you had good potential. It's cool to see how much you've grown, and improved man. Always valuable info, applicable, and not stale.. I do miss the llamas though LOL Vids have been such an awesome help throughout the years.
Thank You SO MUSCH For The HELP! ❤😊
I never knew I needed those number announcements right up until now .
This helped a lot thank you!!
I loved the opening,Tom!
Thomas, you could start a serie of videos talking about your progress in something you started, for example, start to learn a new language and show to us how to commit and don't quit, just a suggestion, regardings from Brasil !
thanks for the vid, tom :) excited for sunday study tips to come back, i’ve missed it dearly. take care
What if I am meeting you for the first time to thank you in person for your content, how do I keep calm and not seeming overly weird?
Whenever that happens, keep in mind the near-certainty that less than 24 hours have passed since I last yelled at Overwatch or lost yet another hoodie
It doesn't seem weird to me ☺️
Can you please make a video on Goal Tracking and Habit Tracking Methods
That’s numberwang! I wonder how many viewers missed this awesome reference. Thanks for including it... made me laff! 😂
I have to meet a new professor who's gonna grade my oral test this weekend... And this is really helping... Thanks Tom 😭❤️
I know this is such a late reply but oh… those oral finals… only way I can get through is looking anywhere but the teacher 😭😂
3. Do research on the other person. Sometimes (Get a gist of who they are or what they like doing)
right so taking pictures of them changing through their bedroom window or do you mean looking into their college field their studying
I want to ask a guy out the day after tommorow.The video could not come at a better moment!!!Thanks😄
The first 30 seconds already greatly helped ))
When trying to talk to new people, it often helps to have a routine in place, especially if you wanna talk to the other gender(s). I often fall back to simple magic tricks to start with and then a really fun imagination exercise called the cube that helps you talk about things like identitiy, ambition, relationship and fears all at one go! Smiling is very useful!!
this channel is lifesaving
Thomas,i miss the goat at the transition.Please bring it back.It had a really deep emotional significance for me.
All the tips :
#1. - Get out of the rejection.
-My self-worth is not being affected by thr rejection.
#2. The meeting is a two-way street.
- The people will feel the same as you feel.
#3. Try to research on the people .
#4. Make a saying that you will win.
#5. I look as nervous as I feel.
#6.Breath deep and slow before the conversation.
#7. Do the listening , let the person do the taking.
#8. An interested people is an interesting people.
Whenever I get nervous I hum or laugh ,I tap my foot, I try to keep away from the person that makes me nervous but doesn't always work . I have learning difference where I have trouble looking people in the eye
What always helps me, is to try acomplish my goals with the other people, my goals in general that i chase in my life, for instance, y use to say everything that appears in my mine with the potential to help the other person, to be more happy and be less miserable, or less ignorant,, like a joke, or like a good habit, or a interesting fact, i also crticate their ideas with respect and emphaty so they don't feel bad, i also do questions about the other person's life, because know that is more confortable that don't, and like that, i never use to have awkward conversations. I hope be helpful, remember, think about your goals and go for it
I'm going to have courage and go out by myself and enjoy a coffee outdoors and read a good book. Hopefully, I'll meet some new people too
Omg that "no, Ron" meme made me laugh 😂😂😂
I met a new person and I was playing with my hands and looking down and It was just plain silent after I introduced myself..
Thank you for this it gives me a sense of relief and in a way some confidence in my self worth. 😊
They’re just as nervous as I am.
Have a mindset that it will go well.
I don’t look as nervous as I am.
Be confident in myself.
Hope this helps going in for my first interview tomorrow. Thanks for the tips
I really needed this video today! Thank you very much Thomas ❤
I really love the look of your videos. Awesome lightning!
Great video, thank you so much!!!
This afternoon I'm starting GED classes and I'm so nervous. My neck hurts so much
Wow good time I’m having an interview this afternoon.
Thanks Thomas.
There was a guy wearing a shirt of a band I like on the last day of school before winter break, my friends helped me find him on Instagram so I started talking to him a couple days ago, I go back to school tomorrow and I’m so nervous to have to actually talk to him in real life aaaa
your vids looks so cozy :)
Regarding the last point, would you consider the possibility of appearing less interesting and more like a know-it-all, when you have a wider range of topics with a moderate understanding of? I have received that feedback on several occasions and would love to hear your opinion (I wouldn't consider myself smug, but then again, self-evaluation is rarely objective)
I was once rejected by my crush, wich was hard, but at least i tried and after that i can tell you, talking to girls i so so much easier as before. The time after that i met a girl who i thought was out of my league but it worked out :) that rule is definitely true.
Thanks dude. You helped me.
Got two new roommates today. What a time to come in clutch
Thank you Thomas! This was what i needed and a great video as always. 🙋🏻♀️
Me: your bones and collagen are arranged in such a beautiful way.
The girl: ??
AYE UR A GORGEOUS GIRL, is what you should say....idk why I'm giving tips, I'm a box when it comes to talking irl
Amazing segue into the sponsor as always
Just ask questions about other people because people like hearing themselves talk and like sharing their interests
i just met new people in a discord server today and i was awkward as HELL like they’d compliment me or something and i’d say stuff like “nah i hate myself” or something please 😭 it was so embarrassing. they said i sounded nice and i told them i have social anxiety but it was still so fvcking awkward oh my god
What happens if both of you follow rule 7?
If my jaw was as strong as this guy's I probably wouldnt be so nervous when meeting new people.
Thnks 4 all your videos. I alwys go back to them as I need.
Thnku 4 all ur hard work n research.!
(I dont understd hw ppl Thumbs down such helpful videos).
I’m watching this because I’m meeting a new sport Team and I am really really nervous
How dose it feel now ...😢
1:00 How did you know?
thank you for this 🙏🏼
Tom, I aspire to be like you! 😌 I love ALL of your content…
Really helpful tips 👌👌 thank you 🙏👍
Thoughts that "Its only momentary".... also applies to approaching any type of fear.
I love your videos so much and I get alot of benefits from them ,thank you so much for sharing ❤❤
Get fit and dress well with hygiene. As shallow as it sounds its amazing how our current body state has such an impact on our confidence as well as charisma
also, exercise has a positive impact on a person's mental state
i’m watching this video after 5yrs😭😂
Know the chemistry of yours and quality investment on self and even out from comfort zone. Even the social environment and adopt it by know it proactive way
Seeing you being calm infront of camera, I wish I had your level of confidence. Haha..
What's the best utube clip on the matrix and how they ended it ??? Save me watching anymore these things
Why did everyone want to hang out with the mushroom? He was fungi.
he pronounced it as fungee
@@Sen5325 since when?
funny how this is posted on the first day of my internship lol
Did anyone notice the picture of Cave Johnson from Portal 2 in the background? it's right next to Thomas's shoulder.
I like that typo too! Lol. The Otter person. 😂
Brother can you make a video that How I can do better result in exam and doing my study properly. Can you give me some tips how I can do that thing?