Sometimes when my mom says, “I’m proud of you” or “I do support you” or when I’m talking about my feelings, she sounds condescending and always makes me feel guilty for them.
Same I have a older sister who is good at everything and smart trying my best to be like my own sister but I can't my memory doesn't stay I just wanna hear the I'm proud of you word the only thing that is what I want...
"A child could never hates it's mom until mother hates child first " I loved her she thought me what hate is she showed me in her every action every word and she never realize.
I never knew an argument could be solved without yelling. I was genuinely confused when my teacher said it possible. I love the moments between the anger. The times where she would be calm and happy. But things change and I’ve grown to be silent or fight back when I have the energy when she yells. But hey, she’s never hit me so that’s a plus lol. She’s my mum and I love her, I just wish anything below and 87% was shit.
I hear you. When I went out into the world I was SHOCKED that I would not get yelled at for simple mistakes or lack of perfection. It made me resentful.
My mother was never physically abusive. She never said anything like “I shouldn’t have had you” or “you ruined my life” and for years I thought she was the most wonderful person and why I ended up with so many mental health problems if they were so great. This year I’ve only started to realize how cold they were to me. I try to hide when I’m feeling upset around the, because I know they won’t take me seriously or say “I’m sorry you feel that way” which only makes me feel guilty for having emotions. I’ve had three mental breakdowns this week and my parents have been there for none of them. I could list so many things my mother has done to make me feel like shit, like finding a stash of m&ms I keep around for when I get the munchies and saying that she hopes I don’t have an eating disorder because of how she raised me, she doesn’t even know that I already am well on my way to an eating disorder but I get the feeling that she would worry that she did something to mess me up instead of actually caring about how I feel, telling me that I need to find a hospitalization program that lasts for less than three months because she doesn’t want me to go too long without a job, telling me that making a pillow for my grandfather (who was dying) wasn’t a very useful gift idea and to just get him some books instead, saying my partner and I are too mentally ill to be together, despite the fact that my partner is more mentally sound than she is because they actually go to therapy, despite the fact that my partner actually cares about how I feel and tells me that I’m loved and that I’m going to be okay while my mother doesn’t even acknowledge how I feel and just ask me what I want her to do to fix things (which is very stressful to have all the responsibility of fixing the problem on me instead of trying to find a compromise), she doesn’t know that I’ve contemplated self harm and that I’m passively suicidal, or maybe she does know and just doesn’t care, and the more I think about it, the more I remember her less than stellar emotional support from when I was growing up. She’s trying her hardest and I know that and recognize that. I don’t want to demonize her but it’s hard to feel the love for your mom when you’re too busy feeling alone. I’m so sorry to everyone out there who has never heard your mother tell you that she loves you and is proud of you so you know what, I’m your mom now. I love you, I’m proud of you, I see that you’re trying your best and that is enough, and don’t forget to take your meds and drink some water today. You’ll be alright.
@@nikkin3830 Thank you for asking. And yeah I am. I’ve been going to therapy and it’s been really helping. My parents are still fairly cold to me and I can confidently say that neither of them are part of my support network (I know they don’t try to be and that they’re doing they’re best but sometimes when I try to tell them how I feel it just doesn’t seem important to them so I’ve stopped trying) but I do have support in other places. I hope you’re doing alright as well
I do not know you, but I hope you're doing alright and that you heal from your trauma, that you find peace and love in your life. I related so much to everything you wrote I couldn't stop crying. Your comment really made me feel just a little bit less lonely and damaged, so thank you!
@@aikaterinhgiannisi2404 Of course, dear. Thank you for commenting. I've made amazing progress since then and most of it is due to my partner and friends. I'm honestly just trying to find good steady income so I can move out. But I'm definitely better than I was when I wrote that first comment. I hope you start to find peace too
The words that i wanna hear from my mom is, “Im sorry. Im sorry for all the things i did, all the pressure and the anger i put out on you. You are brave, confident, and a smart girl. U are my dauguter and Im proud of you….I love you.”
I grew up knowing I was always going to be second best. I grew up knowing I would never be good enough for my mother. When she wouldn't get her way, she would yell. She always treated my brother better than me. She yells at my step dad. My dad and her fight every time they get. She never told my dad I was born, my grandfather told my father. She always tells me that I won't be able to graduate. She told me that I won't make it through boot camp in the Army if I ever joined. I had a best friend, her mom was so cool. I was actually jealous of her cause she had a cool mom. She was never there when I was being bullied. She was never there, I had to raise myself up to end of elematary. My sister came into my life *we're not blood related but we act like sisters* and she taught me everything I needed to know. She taught me about periods and all that. My sister had been more of a mother figure more than my own mother.
I don't remember her being a terrible mother when I was little, but as a single mother she was always away having to work to bring me home. But as I've grown up, she's kind of become someone else, I love her so much and I try so hard to make her proud and give back all the love and effort I saw her sacrifice for me as a little girl.But I grew up and she started to replace good words of encouragement with harsh and hurtful words, she started calling me a parasite when I don't do something she says... She seems to have stopped loving me like before...
Its very sweet you displayed all these comments and gave those people a chance to shine through their darkness. I love that its the same video but with reality overlaid. Beautiful.
I am a 24 years old woman....My mother has been blaming me for every wrong in the house and it has gotten worse....nothing change except for getting worse....she blames me even for the arguements she has with my siblings and stops talking to me.... It's kind of weird how can these people never even love the life they brought into this world.
I once talking to a work friend about stuff my used to do I thought it was normal, until I started crying my eyes out and she just hugged until I let go. I see more of a maternal figure in people I've known for less than a year than someone I've known my whoile life.
My mother really destroyed my life 💔She made me hate myself so much😢 I will never forgive her👌🏻I will keep remembering what she did to me throughout my life until I die🥺I wished my mother would be as affectionate as some mothers🥺Whenever I see a mother and her daughter laughing together I cry 😞 I hate you mom I hate youuuuuuuuuuuu 😭
My grandma would hit me for not doing the dishes at the exact minute she asked me to. I remember running up the stairs as fast as possible just so no more bruises could form. She's my mom's mom and my mom never understood why I hated her so much and still forces me to spend time with the woman that told me I should cut my stomach off so I looked slimmer and that if I were hers I would have been disowned back when I was two. I've had depression since I was three and suicidal thoughts since I was 7. I never understood what a grandma should really act like because that's all I ever knew was being hit and yelled at and told that no one loved me since I was three. I'm now twelve and I don't know just how much longer I can hold on.
You don't deserve this. No one does. But as a fellow survivor of a mother who enabled others to abuse me. You will find your way, and you will find love and acceptance. You are and will be loved. I encourage you to reach out to others if your mom won't listen. Get someone who will. I am so sorry you have to deal with this, I wanted to unalive myself so many times because my own mother left me with whoever she met at church that week. I didn't have plans to live past 30, but I am 31, and things are going ok. I have found people who see me and love me just as I am. And I promise you will too. You are worthy of love, and you will be loved. Today and tomorrow.
Whenever my mother did anything for me, I was always expected to "return the favor" down the line by sacrificing my happiness, life, purpose, everything for her and my brother and my father. Everything I ever got was another debt of giving up another fundamental part of me for their approval. I ended up with schizophrenia just because my family hated me so intensely for being the cause of my father's death when he couldn't verbally and physically threaten me anymore. And even then, my acquired disability wasn't their fault, all the stress they forced on me was my own fault for crying to them about it and bothering them about it all the way to when I was born. I was left to my distant relatives when I was born, because my mother thought that her career and happiness going to America was far more important than my needs, so I was never fed by her, never held by her. My relatives raised me, and even then they saw me as someone else's child. My father, also, saw me as a parasite from the moment I was born. He solidly believed that all the way to the end of his days.
She made me feel like I was worthless. I never felt pretty, the the bully’s the taunts those words would have never mattered if my mom could have looked me in the eye and called me beautiful. She never could and even now she has 5 daughters and I feel like there’s a part of me that holds the thought that she regretted me out of all of us. As I walked through the isles of the grocery store and kneeled down to cry all I could wonder was how could my Mami say that to me?
All I ever wanted was a mom not a master mind, not a manipulator or narcissistic asshole,or smoking addicting junkie. All my life that woman done nothing but used me for her own selfish gain or my siblings I love her yes we rarely had good moments. But that doesn’t change everything you did as someone once said “I AM NOT ANGRY!! I AM IN PAIN YOU PUT ME HERE!!!! THE PERSON WHO WAS SUPPOSED TO LOVE CHERISH ME MOST!!!”
The only thing i ever wanted from my mother was for her to realize how hard i've always tried to be "perfect." I got kicked out at 18 cause i just stopped caring about what she thought about me. I've been called names my whole life. The only reason i ever stayed in HER house was for my siblings. My "Mother" sat me down at are kitchen table and told me about how she knew she messed up with me and that she was sorry for it but the only thing i could think of was "How can you sit here and try to fix 18 years of trauma with a simple, sorry." I was raised by my 2 loving aunts more than i was ever raised by my own "Mother." I want to cut all contact with her but i wont because i love my younger siblings and want them to know i'm not abandoning them.
I currently have a verbally abusive mother and it's not pleasant in any way. For me, every days an argument and I recent had one with her today, she drove me to the point where I yelled at her to the top of my lungs. My very last words to her were "I hate you, I really hate you for what you made me become."
I’m so sorry she said that to you🙁 your still young so your only who you are right now and anyone could do better , nobody is perfect. But you are not who you are going to become, you still have growing to do. Life will bring you challenges but you can let them make you stronger or make you weaker. Stay strong🫶🏼 and get stronger. I’m here if you need a friends or someone to talk to. You’re not alone , even when it feels like it💕🫶🏼🩹
Once when I was younger my mom told me she might not always be right but she always did what she thought was best for me in the moment, I sat there and wondered hold she could think that things that hurt me so badly could possibly be good for me. That was the day I realized she didn’t know what she was doing was wrong. Because that’s how she was raised.
When I was 7 my sister stated taking up all of my mothers attention, and I am a very attention seeking person. Me and my sister used to fight non stop. Whenever I was in the same room as my mom my sister would usually come in, since we we’re always fighting my parents like to keeps us in separate rooms,so if my sister came in my mother would send me out. That happened for a year and. A half. I had so much bottled up anger. Eventually my mother sent my sister to go away instead of me. She explained that I had been leaving and distancing myself from everyone, all true, and it was because of them. I started hanging out with them more. Even though I was much happier i still had 2 years of bottled up anger and no was to let it out. For about a year I had been randomly throwing up, only on the carpet like twice I always made it to the bathroom, and then I told my parents. It was just random whenever I ate to much of had to much liquid. I never felt sick or anything when throwing up it was just strange. My mom got annoyed and she started blaming me for it. I already had depression, which my mom ignored, and her doing this gave me a lot of anxiety. It got worse. Anyways we fight a lot and I’m always apologising. What I don’t understand is that when me and my sister fight I’m told to be responsible and apologise even if It’s not my fault because I’m the oldest but when my and my mom fight I still have to apologise. I think it’s a “ respect your elders” thing. Whatever. My life’s shit 🤪 and I wanna die but I’m to scared of pain lol, my mom sucks and I don’t feel safe around her 😓. P.S I’m not trying to say my life is worse than anyones or something.
My mom is a addicted, she left my dad, my sister everything. I can't forgive her anymore She broke my sister, my sister is a little girl of 11 years old, she doesn't deserve it, she deserve piece, happiness, everything she wanted
the worse thing than not having your mom alive is not having the feeling that she is your mom, but rather a demon who's in the shape of your mom. I have never experienced physical abuse, but the mental torture I received was way beyond words can express. I just hope that no-one has an emotionally unavailable/abusive mom.
My mother is a mental abuser, she would destroy everything that I loved and cared about a couple months ago her and I got into an argument all because I said I wanna stay with dad for the summer since I go to her place every year, she accused me of not loving her, I'm crazy, a pathetic mess etc. Ever since then I haven't talked to her. I don't really see her as a mom ever cause she was never there and she treated me like I was nothing and that I don't have feelings
Ik i feel the pain im having depression too my family would shout at Me especially my mom my brother gets yell at too but not much i feel like why am i alive i sometimes laugh at stupid things and i get angry at little things and i dont do any stupid things but i sleep alot everytime but everytime i will got to my room i cry and lay down and cry till i sleep but Its still not enough i love my family alot especially my mom my dad and my brother i love them alot but didk weather they love Me back i’m always rude alot of times and sometimes my Heart breaks Cause i’m always deppresed and then i’m like will i be loved again like when i was 5 and 6 years old and sometimes i watch my young childhood vids of how happy i was there and i was bullied in school most of the times sometimes when i got in the bathub i would put the temperature HOT and sometimes i stay in there for hours enjoying it and sometimes i even rest in the bathub in the HOT water that always helped Me and I rest there also. then i keep saying “am i the right person” “ am i right to be alive” and then I get angry I throw things in my room and sleep on the floor even though it’s cold but every time I see my dad picking me up from the floor to put me to the bed not wanting me to get sick and every time I go downstairs I see my mom watching a movie with him I do have friends but i don’t tell them how I feel but sometimes but before then I thought I was happiness girl ever but now just the sadness girl ever I thought I was the most cute and cool girl and now I’m the saddest meanest and rudest girl ever and I’m kind to always I’m rude to everyone but sometimes I help people and be kind to them I’m just feeling empty and dying inside when there is no one by my side and sometimes I cry and look in the mirror and say “who are you to be like this what happened to the old you” I’m a GIRL who can be Sad every time I’m angry rude sad mean bad upset and kind I sometimes even hit myself I love everyone but I don’t know weather they love me then every time I sleep and get waked up early morning or put my alarm to wake up(for school) I get angry when I hear that alarm and i sometimes shout on my pillow cause I want to rest forever and sleep not wanting to wake up it’s feels good to sleep. I’m trying to get rid of My DEPRESSION
It hurts when our mom expects us to do our best and repay her one day even though we never asked them to take care of us as its their responsibility as a parent, they always expect us to do good, give back to them to their hard work to us their children when they dont even try to fully understand us and know our point of view
I remember growing up as a teenager I hated my mother so much she had give up everything for me to be perfect I realized how much she had loved me she never caused me so much pain like I did to her I was a horrible daughter to her my mother deserved so much better from me she has been with me through thick and thin I love my mother
The one person who I thought I could always fall back on proved to be that I couldn’t. Caused me and my siblings so much pain. 😔 sometimes I don’t know how I’ve done it. 😢😪 all I want is good in my life and all she does is cause pain.
Ik I‘m late to this but I just want to say, I am veary proud of all of you, I to had and still have a hard life but I never had it as bad as most of you and I‘m sorry so many of you had to go through such bad things with their mom, dad or parents in ganerell and I want all of you to know how brav and strong you are and I want to thank you all for sharing you stories with the rest of us. Pleas always remamber, you are a good person, you are worthy of love, you don‘t have to prove any thing to any one but yourself, you don‘t have to live up to the expactations of others, your beautyfull, your smart, YOU ARE PERFECT JUST BY BEING YOURSELF!!!! I love you people and pls never forget your human you have feelings you have a right to feel and that dosen‘t makes you weak it just shows that your a person who feels.
I got "I'm proud of you" from both my parents on how I'm living my adult life...I didn't think it'd cause me to be so disgusted with who I am to them. I thought I could do more for me, them, family. It's like all that talent they kept saying I wasted really did vanish. So this is what they really thought I'd amount to ? It's not even more than surviving.
My mother died when I was young. Was raised by my grandmother. She is so abusive. Mentally and emotionally. When she scolds me and I stay quiet, she says I'm a weak person. When I fight back, she says I'm toxic and that nobody will ever love me. Been in this hell for 10 years. There is no escaping it. All I can do is just survive.
I always think that I don't have the right to complain about my Mother or say the she "verbally abuses" me because I have a house, food, clothes, parents, money, etc. But she's always yelling at me and constantly criticizing me. I know sometimes she pushes me to make me better but the way she does it hurts the most. She tells me that she wants to be my friend and that I can talk to her about anything, but whenever I try to open up to her and talk about my feelings and how I want her to change a bit, she blames it all on me and starts talking about what I need to change. She doesn't understand how much pain she causes me and now I've stopped crying as often because I'm just used to the way she talks to me.
Yeah i also felt that . My mother is same like how you described. I just wanted her to love me . I always try to make her happy. But all she gives me is criticism and pain . I cry a lot becoz of her . She think she know me . She think i am just useless. I feel unsafe around her . I don't have anyone to talk to . My dad died and my mom acts like a insane person . She is so aggressive. 😞
Funny how u can love and hate a person at same times .she says she loves . She surely does but i feel hate for her everyday we have an argument and her words "you shouldn't have been born", "i never wanted a daughter like you", you're a witch", "you're selfish" and yet beat me badly still says "i love you" she loves me? Mom then why u do this , why u hurt me , why u beat me and it's worst mom tryna act like I'm a bitch I don't care but it hurts me i breakdown everyday . Why things changed so much after i became a teen?
⚠tw (SA and @buse, @buse to children and babies) ⚠ my mum used her 6 childen for child benefits and a house "this used to happen in the UK but not anymore" and she wouldn't look after any of us she wasn't even a mum and she hated my guts she used to say that she hated our dad and used her children as a therapy session to complain about our dad and brainwash us into hating him too. she also within the same convocation say that I'm just like him. she used to beat us until we couldn't breath and sometimes even my 2 yr brother and sister and when i could when they were in trouble i would hide them in this cupboard and i would blame it on me of piss her off sm that she would just get her anger out on me just so my younger siblings wouldn't have to go through it as bad as me. i have no idea why she hated me even though used to look after her youngest children but i guess that why she had 1 reason to hate bc she was probably jealous I did it better than her. p.s i got back into contact with my dad and nan after years of fighting for it after being in foster care. but my sister 2 years ago went back her abusive alcholic dad (my youngest sister had a different dad to the rest of us) and the social worker didn't believe us when we said not and explained why and she got beaten to and sa'ed by him don't worry she out now and with a foster family who are amazing and I'm seeing her tomorrow actually.
My mother was abusive in many ways and used my sister's as prostitutes for her own gain tell this day she chooses my younger brother who always beat her always drink always did drugs and yet didn't love me 😭😭😭 even tho I have my life together a wife two beautiful kids land I never abused my mom but she never loved me thank God for my grandma 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
yk i did everything thinking my mum will support me but she never did she always blamed she always been selfish she never allow me to have friends and whenever i make she ruins it she never stood for me never i wish i would be dead
It hurts... I really wish that my old , my REAL mom would come back to me... i miss her... i hate the new side of her. Something she doesn't is that I am the EXACT copy of her... from body to hair... EVERYTHING. I suffer from the same disorders as she does and it hurts when she denies me and does something that worsens it. I have seen her suffering... i understand its hard for her but hey don't take out that frustration on me... i ain't done anything to you except trying to become better. My mom would always choose my brother over me and it hurts. My brother grew up not having a lot friends but really sweet and genuine ones. But that wasn't the case for me. I grew up with the mean selfish kind who had their own issues to resolve. So i never ranted out on them anytime. And she thought and always used to say i am getting influenced by them when i clearly wasn't. I was always made to do the house chores while my brother slept, i was always shouted at, and abused physically. I would have my phone being checked regularly and i didn't get ANY privacy. I just wished that maybe one day she would change but she never did. And now anytime she would hug me or sit close to me, i would always back off or feel awkward because i had gotten used to the feeling of being away...
My mom left me and my dad when I was 3, and she rarely keeps in contact with me. she abandoned my and I feel like its my fault she left, cause that's how my dad made me feel after she left.
I really need to belive That my Mom wants me cuz every day That pasa feels like he es pushing me away And i dont wanna hate her cuz its my mom and i Will love her besides everything
A letter to my mom: You know, i really really wish I had a close bond with you. Alot of kids around me tell me so many wonderful stories about their mothers and I get jealous. I wish you could see me for I am. I wish you would treat me like a normal person and not just some random person. Everyday I wake up to go to school I always wish you don't wake up until I leave for school because once you do, your words will slice through my heart and ruin my day. You tell me how I know nothing, I'm dirty, I'm a dog, how useless I am sometimes...you love to manipulate me and gaslight me and make me feel so bad. Every time I couldn't hold it in anymore, I would cut myself in places no one could see...I hid my scares for so many years. When I'm not okay, you tell me to stop having an attitude and you continue to bad mouth me in front of my younger brother....what is he going to think of me when he is older? Huh? The one person who is supposed to know me doesn't. For goodness sakes I'm not even close to my father, but even he knows me better than you ever did. He understands, you don't. The way you used to beat me until I was black and blue, I lost my love and trust for you, and I replaced it with fear and distrust. How can I be happy at this place I call home? I don't tell you most of what I want to tell you because every time I did, you would brush it off or criticize me for it...can't I just be good enough for you to at least treat me better? But its okay tho, I got used to it, I lived with it, and I promise you, I'm going to be the mother you never were, I'm going to love my kids so much like you never did, I'm going to be a MOTHER. I'm moving out very soon, and I have never been more excited or happier. Hope you become a better person tho, I really hope so.
every wrong thing my younger sibling does always ends up as my fault in my mother's eyes " you are worthless" she says. all I want is for her to say "am proud of you" but after all the mental abuse all these years I still want her to love me I still struggle to get her love, I keep on asking my self am not good enough or am not even good at all. PLEASE WHAT SHOULD I DO.
My mom hates me because of a guy she never said it but it's pretty obvious in the way she treats me versus her other kids. My sister too , that wss the perfect guy for them and I just found another way to ruin it for them.....I wished they believed me.....
Sorry if I’m late on this but my mom left me and came back when I turned eleven didn’t even show up on my birthday it was about years past by and didn’t even get me something for my birthday didn’t even said happy birthday daughter hope you have a great birthday and ever came back ever seen the on the holidays because she always come and don’t no more and she moved back in and her and my dad argue a lot lately and I just want to ran away from them. Because they broke me and hurt my feelings like it’s my fault and they are the problem that my heart is broken
She never did love me. All she did was watch horror movies with her boyfriend while I was on the other side of the couch crying. I craved her attention and affection. I never did hear a "I love you" from her. I was always jealous and hated her boyfriend since he was the one that always got the attention. I understand that she was going through a hard time and she wants quite mature that age but. I was still here. And I needed you there for me. What did I do to make you not love me? Then she left when I was 6. My grandparents were the ones taking care of me while you were spending time with your boyfriend. I just wanted you to love me and care for me. That's all I asked.
it's werid how the person who's supposed to love you like in books and in movies but she's the one who makes u feel as if though you're never enough. werid werid
My mom had me pretty young she married my dad because she got pregnant after I was born I turned 8 and she would party with her friends till 5am and I would hear them fighting it was hard and she wasn’t there for me I was never good enough
I'm having a hard time keeping everything together and she just abandoned me alone in this house for a few years. It's very hard, God, I feel like giving up.
My mother is very controlling she would comment on my weight saying "I'm as fat as a cow and a pig" then force me to eat two big plates full of food, she would pull me by my hair and force my to drop onto my knees as she dragged me all around the house by my hair and hit me with a broom on my back, I was later diagnosed with rotoscoliosis and have had it for 4 years now after we found out she stop hitting the broom onto my back and instead would punch and kick it, she would put all her weight on my whenever it was time for bed ( because we slept on the same bed till I was like 10 or 11 ) while I would be given very little space and slept between the wall and my mother she would also lock me in the bathroom for hours whenever I needed non physical" discipline" and threaten to hit me if I turned on the lights ( little to no lights whatsoever could be seen in there ) I later developed I fear of the dark and fear of tight spaces, she would force me to go out with her often and while getting ready she would start to get angry for insignificant things that would lead to her hitting and pulling my hair if this does not happen before we leave then after we arrive for sometime later she would hit and verbally abuse me for a tiny imperfection whether it be smiling to much at people, not smiling enough, talking,not talking, laughing, sitting down, not sitting down, crying whenever she would harshly squeeze and pull me and more a year later I would have minor panic attacks whenever I would have to go out, she would lie about me to family, friends even strangers she also enjoyed humiliating me in public and yell out lies resulting in people staring at me while whispering among themselves later had a fear of people and large crowds, I started self harming and became extremely suicidal and she found out about one of three failed attempts she hit me nonstop the night my cousin left ( my cousin was there when she found out so she couldn't do anything to me that moment ) and said for me to stop being a baby and an attention seeker and just actually kill myself throwing razors in front of me saying she can do it for me if I want and I was later put under suicide watch, she tried to get me a bunch of different medications saying things like how I was bipolar and had severe anger issues and that I was crazy mind you she gave me medications three times a day at the ripe age of 3 because I had to " behave good " and now have messed up nerves and memory, she would force me to hug her but push or hit me if I ever tried to do it of my own free will, I got molested alot and by another of people and she just said she went throughworse cause only her brother molested her plus that same brother would peek on me while I would change or sleep I can't have people touch me or I start to freak out even if it's my grandparents that always defended me from her the longest I can hug them or let them hug my is like 2-3 minutes... ... ... ... so- yeah half of my life but shorter version 🧍💃
She called me fatty . Slut. Whore. Bodyshamming me. Abused me. Physically and mentally. She always hate me. Every little thing i do. Shes hate those things. She never understand me . Always saying i was a mistake. Never support me. Always my other siblings not me. Even though I am the younger kid. She always left me in my worst and when I'm healing she come back and ruin my life again . She said I don't deserve anything . I don't deserve to be happy. She always cursed me . I don't know what I hv done for getting treating this shit
I’m in debt and work my ass off getting a fucking bachelors in bio and I’m still not enough. I’m still a failure to her, even the smallest thing that brings me joy she yells at me for doing or says it’s immature. I still can’t sleep cause I feel like suck a waste of space, I still want to just go to sleep and not wake up. I’ve never felt at home where i was raised where I should feel the most nostalgic and love.
I just wanted to be loved. I wanted the little things. A kiss on the cheek, a pat on the back, to be cuddled, hugs, TO BE ENOUGH! TO BE PROTECTED FROM MY RAPIST! TO BE PROTECTED! BUT NO! NOW I NEED PROTECTION FROM HER! AND EVERYONE ELSE IN THIS GOD DAMN WORLD! I don’t understand what I did or didn’t do to deserve all this absolute SHIT I’ve had to deal with since I was 10 FUCKING YEARS OLD!
My mom has not lived with me in 8 years I'm in high school and she asked me how I did at school that day the one time I saw her I told her good and she ask if I had strate a's when I told her no she asked why not and I said idk the reason is because I'm in advanced classes and struggling my ass off just to try to make a passing grade and all I ever wanted was for her to be proud once but instead I had token care of her for years then got forgot about any chance she got
My Mother was an alcoholic. Mean fucking drunk. She would beat me constantly. The last time I’ve ever seen her was in the courtroom sentencing her for life in jail. She would have parole after serving 25 years.
I was aware how my mom works hard for me and my younger siblings she was always so unfair to me when it comes to me because i am the eldest and im a girl so i have to be responsible but all i get is to be scolded all she see and my so called family see is my mistake i have never heard her say im proud of you instead she compares me to teens my age who already has a child she always see my wrong doings but when it comes to my younger brother and my half sister she always tolerates them stating they are still young their younger than u so you should understand them as the eldest, i mean how could i ever get myself to understand them when even my younger siblings talk shit about me she said their still kids is ther any kids who know how to talk back and talk shit about their older sibling right in front of their face? Kids ? Their still kids ? My younger brother who is about to become a high school student this school and my younger sister who is about to be 7 y.o who knows how to do make up and cry when things dont go her way like my younger brother, my mom even compared and complained to me about my father who cheated on her and when she needed money for us for school and other expenses he always finds shity excuses she said don't make it too obvious that your just like your good for nothing lazy father she even said in the past that if its ok to kill a child she would have killed me along time ago when i was a baby if she knew i would be like this she even said that im like a pig u know cuz pig only know to eat and sleep well sorry if im like a pig even physical appearance looks like one to my mother every i do is not enough and will never be enough but she is always so supportive towards my younger siblings cuz well they need attention more that i do i guess , i guess she just literally forgot that she still have an another daughter even when i became a consistent honor she just said ok work hard so that u will still be an honor next quarter , she left me om my own to take care of myself at home so that she could watch over my siblings, she always complains to me how she is very tired from work bot knowing that im dying mentally and emotionally i needed her i need my mom but for my mom im too much , i needed my mom but she only looks at my younger siblings not me. Whenever im at home i always fell and i always know that i dont belong hear but it pains me more when even my mother makes me feel that way , anyway i cant even rely on my father he has his own family and children to take care of i dont even know if he also supports his other children from his past wives im still a minor but i cant even rely on any of my parents and i always fell like im nothing but a shit here at home luckyly i still have my bestfriend who is like an older sister to me to sympathize with me because of her horrible father who didn't want her cuz she is a girl and always finds fault at her for no reason and her mother who could do nothing but tolerate her behaviour. Whenever im at home i always feal like im nothing but a useless piece of garbage none of my whole family knows that i suffer from stress, depression, im not sure about anxiety none of them knows except my bestfriend who knows me better than anyone else
Me siento tan sola y triste y encima ahora ellos me ponen triste..solo tengo a mi padre? LOS DEMÁS DE MI FAMILIA TIENEN A OTROS Y YO?? NO QUIERO HACERME LA VÍCTIMA PERO NO SERÍA YO LA MÁS TRISTE?:(
I always do my best but my parents never satisfied because they had a son ( a person who is very important for my parents) and they always treat him like a prince , but they never love me because I am a girl 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
I understand how this feels I wish my mother would actually care about me I always feel unwanted from her she doesn't care how I feel all the time I just want to commute suicide and I can't deal with my mother anymore I know suicide is not the answer but people don't understand I yell at my mom cuz I don't live with her she chooses to be rude pic favorites and make all of us depressed and she got the oldest depressed and that's me I have two brothers and one sister my little sister is 11 my oldest brother is seven and the youngest one I have of my brothers he is sex and I can't deal with my life with my mother anymore I don't know what to do!!!
actually I really doesn't hate my mom, she's good but for just once I wanna listen from her mouth "YOU DID GREAT I AM PROUD OF YOU" not every time like she said "I AM TIRED IF YOU OR I AM REALLY DISAPPOINTED ON U." i can't say this infront of her but I wanna say here "MOM.... PLEASE DONT BE DISAPPOINTED AT ME...I DID AS YOU WISH I DID EVERYTHING! EVERYTIME AS YOU TOLD ME! YOU TOLD ME GIVE ME GOOD GRADES I CAME WITH 70%+ AS YOU WANT MOM I DID BUT THE DISAPPOINTED LOOK IN YOUR FACE STILL MAKE ME DOUBT ON MYSELF! WHAT DID I DO WRONG THAT AGAIN! AGAIN THAT Disappointed' LOOK BUT NOT THE 'PROUD' LOOK! BELIEVE ME MOM I STAY AWAKE COUNTLESS NIGHT TO GET GOOD GRADES EVERYTIME CAUSE FOR ONE THING 'PROUD'IN YOUR FACE FOR ME. WHEN TOU SAID GO SOCIALISE WITH PEOPLE MORE KNOWING I HAVE SOCIAL ANXIETY I STILL DID CAUSE I WANT YOU TO DONT LOOK DOWN ON ME! I TRIED MOM I REALLY TRIED BUT NOTHING HELPED! PLEASE GOD PLEASE MAKE MY MOM TRUST FOR ME SOMETIME A LITTLE MORE PLEASE WAIT A LITTLE I PROMISE I WILL MAKE HER PROUD ON ME! PLEASE I AM TRYING TO BE SO STRONG! IDC IF I AM LOSING MYSELF OR NOT! BUT I WANT The PROUD LOOK PLEASE " actually I got admitted in school at the age of 2 cause i started talking earlier and started studying hard instead of Playing happily with other kids. when I had to play happily and enjoy my childhood o actually studied my ass of...that's hurts that i really doesn't enjoy my childhood
Hurt people hurt people. Our mother's were hurt and hurting from their own Demons . Don't forget that generational mental illness is real. Look deeply into the past of most parents and you will see that it's pasted down pain. I didn't do right by my own children and I know this and I apologize for the life that they have lived. I am broken inside for them, for Me, for my mother. I'm sure that my mother died with regrets and I know that I will die with same regrets.
You know my mother hada mental illness and she wasn't fir to be a.mother and she didn't really raise. Us more robin and my dad. And she didn't even want us. I know it wasn't her fault but its still hurts
She'd look me in the eyes and tell me she wish that she aborted me. And all I wish is for to love me even if it little. Makes me wonder how a mum could hate her kid that much
why didnt i just die when i was born all these years of suffering my way of loving my parents My father barely new me since he went to prison for a couple times maybey this is a punishment
![[ENGSUB] UNPRODUCTIVE DAY ใช้ชีวิต (เปื่อยๆ) ด้วยกัน 1 วัน! | OUROAD CLOSEFRiEND SS2 EP.9](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/pyYKZ3kra9w/mqdefault.jpg)
You know I only wished for four words from her. And that was “I’m proud of you”
Same, I wish my mom will say that too
I’m proud of you. So proud of you. I know it’s not the same, but I’m willing to do what I can to help you. I’m proud of you.
Sometimes when my mom says, “I’m proud of you” or “I do support you” or when I’m talking about my feelings, she sounds condescending and always makes me feel guilty for them.
I did too…
Same I have a older sister who is good at everything and smart trying my best to be like my own sister but I can't my memory doesn't stay I just wanna hear the I'm proud of you word the only thing that is what I want...
"A child could never hates it's mom until mother hates child first "
I loved her she thought me what hate is she showed me in her every action every word and she never realize.
I never knew an argument could be solved without yelling. I was genuinely confused when my teacher said it possible. I love the moments between the anger. The times where she would be calm and happy. But things change and I’ve grown to be silent or fight back when I have the energy when she yells. But hey, she’s never hit me so that’s a plus lol. She’s my mum and I love her, I just wish anything below and 87% was shit.
I hear you. When I went out into the world I was SHOCKED that I would not get yelled at for simple mistakes or lack of perfection. It made me resentful.
... she never hit you- like not even a small slap and bruise?!
My mother was never physically abusive. She never said anything like “I shouldn’t have had you” or “you ruined my life” and for years I thought she was the most wonderful person and why I ended up with so many mental health problems if they were so great. This year I’ve only started to realize how cold they were to me. I try to hide when I’m feeling upset around the, because I know they won’t take me seriously or say “I’m sorry you feel that way” which only makes me feel guilty for having emotions. I’ve had three mental breakdowns this week and my parents have been there for none of them. I could list so many things my mother has done to make me feel like shit, like finding a stash of m&ms I keep around for when I get the munchies and saying that she hopes I don’t have an eating disorder because of how she raised me, she doesn’t even know that I already am well on my way to an eating disorder but I get the feeling that she would worry that she did something to mess me up instead of actually caring about how I feel, telling me that I need to find a hospitalization program that lasts for less than three months because she doesn’t want me to go too long without a job, telling me that making a pillow for my grandfather (who was dying) wasn’t a very useful gift idea and to just get him some books instead, saying my partner and I are too mentally ill to be together, despite the fact that my partner is more mentally sound than she is because they actually go to therapy, despite the fact that my partner actually cares about how I feel and tells me that I’m loved and that I’m going to be okay while my mother doesn’t even acknowledge how I feel and just ask me what I want her to do to fix things (which is very stressful to have all the responsibility of fixing the problem on me instead of trying to find a compromise), she doesn’t know that I’ve contemplated self harm and that I’m passively suicidal, or maybe she does know and just doesn’t care, and the more I think about it, the more I remember her less than stellar emotional support from when I was growing up. She’s trying her hardest and I know that and recognize that. I don’t want to demonize her but it’s hard to feel the love for your mom when you’re too busy feeling alone.
I’m so sorry to everyone out there who has never heard your mother tell you that she loves you and is proud of you so you know what, I’m your mom now. I love you, I’m proud of you, I see that you’re trying your best and that is enough, and don’t forget to take your meds and drink some water today. You’ll be alright.
This is so relatable. Are you ok now?
@@nikkin3830 Thank you for asking. And yeah I am. I’ve been going to therapy and it’s been really helping. My parents are still fairly cold to me and I can confidently say that neither of them are part of my support network (I know they don’t try to be and that they’re doing they’re best but sometimes when I try to tell them how I feel it just doesn’t seem important to them so I’ve stopped trying) but I do have support in other places. I hope you’re doing alright as well
I do not know you, but I hope you're doing alright and that you heal from your trauma, that you find peace and love in your life. I related so much to everything you wrote I couldn't stop crying. Your comment really made me feel just a little bit less lonely and damaged, so thank you!
@@aikaterinhgiannisi2404 Of course, dear. Thank you for commenting. I've made amazing progress since then and most of it is due to my partner and friends. I'm honestly just trying to find good steady income so I can move out. But I'm definitely better than I was when I wrote that first comment. I hope you start to find peace too
Oh we have the same thing the things that happened to you happened to me too...
The words that i wanna hear from my mom is, “Im sorry. Im sorry for all the things i did, all the pressure and the anger i put out on you. You are brave, confident, and a smart girl. U are my dauguter and Im proud of you….I love you.”
I grew up knowing I was always going to be second best. I grew up knowing I would never be good enough for my mother. When she wouldn't get her way, she would yell. She always treated my brother better than me. She yells at my step dad. My dad and her fight every time they get. She never told my dad I was born, my grandfather told my father. She always tells me that I won't be able to graduate. She told me that I won't make it through boot camp in the Army if I ever joined. I had a best friend, her mom was so cool. I was actually jealous of her cause she had a cool mom. She was never there when I was being bullied. She was never there, I had to raise myself up to end of elematary. My sister came into my life *we're not blood related but we act like sisters* and she taught me everything I needed to know. She taught me about periods and all that. My sister had been more of a mother figure more than my own mother.
The biggest problem in the world is that anyone can have children, but not everyone can be a parent
Fr fr.
Exactly
I don't remember her being a terrible mother when I was little, but as a single mother she was always away having to work to bring me home. But as I've grown up, she's kind of become someone else, I love her so much and I try so hard to make her proud and give back all the love and effort I saw her sacrifice for me as a little girl.But I grew up and she started to replace good words of encouragement with harsh and hurtful words, she started calling me a parasite when I don't do something she says... She seems to have stopped loving me like before...
No matter how hard I try I'm not good enough, she was suposed to be there suposed to understand but she never understands.
😢
Tragic... Sounds like a twisted relationship that you had with your mother.
Its very sweet you displayed all these comments and gave those people a chance to shine through their darkness. I love that its the same video but with reality overlaid. Beautiful.
I wish tho my mom will be here so she see what ima doin now but see choose to come into a guy I've never felt mom's love I wish she will come back
I am a 24 years old woman....My mother has been blaming me for every wrong in the house and it has gotten worse....nothing change except for getting worse....she blames me even for the arguements she has with my siblings and stops talking to me.... It's kind of weird how can these people never even love the life they brought into this world.
I once talking to a work friend about stuff my used to do I thought it was normal, until I started crying my eyes out and she just hugged until I let go. I see more of a maternal figure in people I've known for less than a year than someone I've known my whoile life.
My mother really destroyed my life 💔She made me hate myself so much😢 I will never forgive her👌🏻I will keep remembering what she did to me throughout my life until I die🥺I wished my mother would be as affectionate as some mothers🥺Whenever I see a mother and her daughter laughing together I cry 😞 I hate you mom I hate youuuuuuuuuuuu 😭
My grandma would hit me for not doing the dishes at the exact minute she asked me to. I remember running up the stairs as fast as possible just so no more bruises could form. She's my mom's mom and my mom never understood why I hated her so much and still forces me to spend time with the woman that told me I should cut my stomach off so I looked slimmer and that if I were hers I would have been disowned back when I was two. I've had depression since I was three and suicidal thoughts since I was 7. I never understood what a grandma should really act like because that's all I ever knew was being hit and yelled at and told that no one loved me since I was three. I'm now twelve and I don't know just how much longer I can hold on.
You don't deserve this. No one does. But as a fellow survivor of a mother who enabled others to abuse me. You will find your way, and you will find love and acceptance. You are and will be loved.
I encourage you to reach out to others if your mom won't listen. Get someone who will. I am so sorry you have to deal with this, I wanted to unalive myself so many times because my own mother left me with whoever she met at church that week. I didn't have plans to live past 30, but I am 31, and things are going ok. I have found people who see me and love me just as I am. And I promise you will too.
You are worthy of love, and you will be loved. Today and tomorrow.
Whenever my mother did anything for me, I was always expected to "return the favor" down the line by sacrificing my happiness, life, purpose, everything for her and my brother and my father. Everything I ever got was another debt of giving up another fundamental part of me for their approval. I ended up with schizophrenia just because my family hated me so intensely for being the cause of my father's death when he couldn't verbally and physically threaten me anymore. And even then, my acquired disability wasn't their fault, all the stress they forced on me was my own fault for crying to them about it and bothering them about it all the way to when I was born. I was left to my distant relatives when I was born, because my mother thought that her career and happiness going to America was far more important than my needs, so I was never fed by her, never held by her. My relatives raised me, and even then they saw me as someone else's child. My father, also, saw me as a parasite from the moment I was born. He solidly believed that all the way to the end of his days.
She made me feel like I was worthless. I never felt pretty, the the bully’s the taunts those words would have never mattered if my mom could have looked me in the eye and called me beautiful. She never could and even now she has 5 daughters and I feel like there’s a part of me that holds the thought that she regretted me out of all of us. As I walked through the isles of the grocery store and kneeled down to cry all I could wonder was how could my Mami say that to me?
All I ever wanted was a mom not a master mind, not a manipulator or narcissistic asshole,or smoking addicting junkie. All my life that woman done nothing but used me for her own selfish gain or my siblings I love her yes we rarely had good moments. But that doesn’t change everything you did as someone once said “I AM NOT ANGRY!! I AM IN PAIN YOU PUT ME HERE!!!! THE PERSON WHO WAS SUPPOSED TO LOVE CHERISH ME MOST!!!”
The only thing i ever wanted from my mother was for her to realize how hard i've always tried to be "perfect." I got kicked out at 18 cause i just stopped caring about what she thought about me. I've been called names my whole life. The only reason i ever stayed in HER house was for my siblings. My "Mother" sat me down at are kitchen table and told me about how she knew she messed up with me and that she was sorry for it but the only thing i could think of was "How can you sit here and try to fix 18 years of trauma with a simple, sorry." I was raised by my 2 loving aunts more than i was ever raised by my own "Mother." I want to cut all contact with her but i wont because i love my younger siblings and want them to know i'm not abandoning them.
I currently have a verbally abusive mother and it's not pleasant in any way. For me, every days an argument and I recent had one with her today, she drove me to the point where I yelled at her to the top of my lungs. My very last words to her were "I hate you, I really hate you for what you made me become."
I’m so sorry she said that to you🙁 your still young so your only who you are right now and anyone could do better , nobody is perfect. But you are not who you are going to become, you still have growing to do. Life will bring you challenges but you can let them make you stronger or make you weaker. Stay strong🫶🏼 and get stronger. I’m here if you need a friends or someone to talk to. You’re not alone , even when it feels like it💕🫶🏼🩹
I really did not need abusive parents like they don’t care anyways and just add to the list of my shit
My mother is not here to support me, she is here to torture me until i die!😭😭
i dont deserve my parents
Once when I was younger my mom told me she might not always be right but she always did what she thought was best for me in the moment, I sat there and wondered hold she could think that things that hurt me so badly could possibly be good for me. That was the day I realized she didn’t know what she was doing was wrong. Because that’s how she was raised.
When I was 7 my sister stated taking up all of my mothers attention, and I am a very attention seeking person. Me and my sister used to fight non stop. Whenever I was in the same room as my mom my sister would usually come in, since we we’re always fighting my parents like to keeps us in separate rooms,so if my sister came in my mother would send me out. That happened for a year and. A half. I had so much bottled up anger. Eventually my mother sent my sister to go away instead of me. She explained that I had been leaving and distancing myself from everyone, all true, and it was because of them. I started hanging out with them more. Even though I was much happier i still had 2 years of bottled up anger and no was to let it out. For about a year I had been randomly throwing up, only on the carpet like twice I always made it to the bathroom, and then I told my parents. It was just random whenever I ate to much of had to much liquid. I never felt sick or anything when throwing up it was just strange. My mom got annoyed and she started blaming me for it. I already had depression, which my mom ignored, and her doing this gave me a lot of anxiety. It got worse. Anyways we fight a lot and I’m always apologising. What I don’t understand is that when me and my sister fight I’m told to be responsible and apologise even if It’s not my fault because I’m the oldest but when my and my mom fight I still have to apologise. I think it’s a “ respect your elders” thing. Whatever. My life’s shit 🤪 and I wanna die but I’m to scared of pain lol, my mom sucks and I don’t feel safe around her 😓. P.S I’m not trying to say my life is worse than anyones or something.
I always smile outside that's doesn't mean that I don't get hurt
All I've wanted was to truly believe my "mom" when she told me she loves me and is proud of me and to feel like I'm truly loved in my family💔
my mom screamed to me that she would kill me .
My mom is a addicted, she left my dad, my sister everything.
I can't forgive her anymore
She broke my sister, my sister is a little girl of 11 years old, she doesn't deserve it, she deserve piece, happiness, everything she wanted
the worse thing than not having your mom alive is not having the feeling that she is your mom, but rather a demon who's in the shape of your mom. I have never experienced physical abuse, but the mental torture I received was way beyond words can express. I just hope that no-one has an emotionally unavailable/abusive mom.
My mother is a mental abuser, she would destroy everything that I loved and cared about a couple months ago her and I got into an argument all because I said I wanna stay with dad for the summer since I go to her place every year, she accused me of not loving her, I'm crazy, a pathetic mess etc. Ever since then I haven't talked to her. I don't really see her as a mom ever cause she was never there and she treated me like I was nothing and that I don't have feelings
Ik i feel the pain im having depression too my family would shout at Me especially my mom my brother gets yell at too but not much i feel like why am i alive i sometimes laugh at stupid things and i get angry at little things and i dont do any stupid things but i sleep alot everytime but everytime i will got to my room i cry and lay down and cry till i sleep but Its still not enough i love my family alot especially my mom my dad and my brother i love them alot but didk weather they love Me back i’m always rude alot of times and sometimes my Heart breaks Cause i’m always deppresed and then i’m like will i be loved again like when i was 5 and 6 years old and sometimes i watch my young childhood vids of how happy i was there and i was bullied in school most of the times sometimes when i got in the bathub i would put the temperature HOT and sometimes i stay in there for hours enjoying it and sometimes i even rest in the bathub in the HOT water that always helped Me and I rest there also. then i keep saying “am i the right person” “ am i right to be alive” and then I get angry I throw things in my room and sleep on the floor even though it’s cold but every time I see my dad picking me up from the floor to put me to the bed not wanting me to get sick and every time I go downstairs I see my mom watching a movie with him I do have friends but i don’t tell them how I feel but sometimes but before then I thought I was happiness girl ever but now just the sadness girl ever I thought I was the most cute and cool girl and now I’m the saddest meanest and rudest girl ever and I’m kind to always I’m rude to everyone but sometimes I help people and be kind to them I’m just feeling empty and dying inside when there is no one by my side and sometimes I cry and look in the mirror and say “who are you to be like this what happened to the old you” I’m a GIRL who can be Sad every time I’m angry rude sad mean bad upset and kind I sometimes even hit myself I love everyone but I don’t know weather they love me then every time I sleep and get waked up early morning or put my alarm to wake up(for school) I get angry when I hear that alarm and i sometimes shout on my pillow cause I want to rest forever and sleep not wanting to wake up it’s feels good to sleep.
I’m trying to get rid of My DEPRESSION
It hurts when our mom expects us to do our best and repay her one day even though we never asked them to take care of us as its their responsibility as a parent, they always expect us to do good, give back to them to their hard work to us their children when they dont even try to fully understand us and know our point of view
I remember growing up as a teenager I hated my mother so much she had give up everything for me to be perfect I realized how much she had loved me she never caused me so much pain like I did to her I was a horrible daughter to her my mother deserved so much better from me she has been with me through thick and thin I love my mother
my Dad story is my grandmother whole are setp father in law geart grandmother good luck on watching up grown are 😢❤
The one person who I thought I could always fall back on proved to be that I couldn’t. Caused me and my siblings so much pain. 😔 sometimes I don’t know how I’ve done it. 😢😪 all I want is good in my life and all she does is cause pain.
Ik I‘m late to this but I just want to say, I am veary proud of all of you, I to had and still have a hard life but I never had it as bad as most of you and I‘m sorry so many of you had to go through such bad things with their mom, dad or parents in ganerell and I want all of you to know how brav and strong you are and I want to thank you all for sharing you stories with the rest of us.
Pleas always remamber, you are a good person, you are worthy of love, you don‘t have to prove any thing to any one but yourself, you don‘t have to live up to the expactations of others, your beautyfull, your smart, YOU ARE PERFECT JUST BY BEING YOURSELF!!!!
I love you people and pls never forget your human you have feelings you have a right to feel and that dosen‘t makes you weak it just shows that your a person who feels.
Finally a decent message.🌅 Try to spread it, because toxicity in this society has gotten out all over the place...
I got "I'm proud of you" from both my parents on how I'm living my adult life...I didn't think it'd cause me to be so disgusted with who I am to them. I thought I could do more for me, them, family. It's like all that talent they kept saying I wasted really did vanish. So this is what they really thought I'd amount to ? It's not even more than surviving.
The only thing I ever wanted from her was for her to tell me she was proud of me and that I wasn't a mistake.
I don’t want an apology. I don’t need it. I want distance, cut ties and peace.
in this vdo most of the thing really i mean istg really really relate to ME
Have you ever tried so hard that you stopped to nothing to make it perfect😭😫💔❤️🩹❤️🩹❤️🩹❤️🩹
My mother died when I was young. Was raised by my grandmother. She is so abusive. Mentally and emotionally. When she scolds me and I stay quiet, she says I'm a weak person. When I fight back, she says I'm toxic and that nobody will ever love me. Been in this hell for 10 years. There is no escaping it. All I can do is just survive.
I always think that I don't have the right to complain about my Mother or say the she "verbally abuses" me because I have a house, food, clothes, parents, money, etc. But she's always yelling at me and constantly criticizing me. I know sometimes she pushes me to make me better but the way she does it hurts the most. She tells me that she wants to be my friend and that I can talk to her about anything, but whenever I try to open up to her and talk about my feelings and how I want her to change a bit, she blames it all on me and starts talking about what I need to change. She doesn't understand how much pain she causes me and now I've stopped crying as often because I'm just used to the way she talks to me.
Yeah i also felt that . My mother is same like how you described. I just wanted her to love me . I always try to make her happy. But all she gives me is criticism and pain . I cry a lot becoz of her
. She think she know me . She think i am just useless. I feel unsafe around her . I don't have anyone to talk to . My dad died and my mom acts like a insane person . She is so aggressive. 😞
I want to talk with my mom when she doesn't.
Then she wants to talk with me, but I don't...
Funny how u can love and hate a person at same times .she says she loves . She surely does but i feel hate for her everyday we have an argument and her words "you shouldn't have been born", "i never wanted a daughter like you", you're a witch", "you're selfish" and yet beat me badly still says "i love you" she loves me? Mom then why u do this , why u hurt me , why u beat me and it's worst mom tryna act like I'm a bitch I don't care but it hurts me i breakdown everyday . Why things changed so much after i became a teen?
Mom once said she never wanted me 🙂
⚠tw (SA and @buse, @buse to children and babies) ⚠
my mum used her 6 childen for child benefits and a house "this used to happen in the UK but not anymore" and she wouldn't look after any of us she wasn't even a mum and she hated my guts she used to say that she hated our dad and used her children as a therapy session to complain about our dad and brainwash us into hating him too. she also within the same convocation say that I'm just like him. she used to beat us until we couldn't breath and sometimes even my 2 yr brother and sister and when i could when they were in trouble i would hide them in this cupboard and i would blame it on me of piss her off sm that she would just get her anger out on me just so my younger siblings wouldn't have to go through it as bad as me. i have no idea why she hated me even though used to look after her youngest children but i guess that why she had 1 reason to hate bc she was probably jealous I did it better than her. p.s i got back into contact with my dad and nan after years of fighting for it after being in foster care. but my sister 2 years ago went back her abusive alcholic dad (my youngest sister had a different dad to the rest of us) and the social worker didn't believe us when we said not and explained why and she got beaten to and sa'ed by him don't worry she out now and with a foster family who are amazing and I'm seeing her tomorrow actually.
also sorry for the long paragraph i needed to vent
My mother was abusive in many ways and used my sister's as prostitutes for her own gain tell this day she chooses my younger brother who always beat her always drink always did drugs and yet didn't love me 😭😭😭 even tho I have my life together a wife two beautiful kids land I never abused my mom but she never loved me thank God for my grandma 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
yk i did everything thinking my mum will support me but she never did she always blamed she always been selfish she never allow me to have friends and whenever i make she ruins it she never stood for me never i wish i would be dead
It hurts... I really wish that my old , my REAL mom would come back to me... i miss her... i hate the new side of her. Something she doesn't is that I am the EXACT copy of her... from body to hair... EVERYTHING. I suffer from the same disorders as she does and it hurts when she denies me and does something that worsens it. I have seen her suffering... i understand its hard for her but hey don't take out that frustration on me... i ain't done anything to you except trying to become better. My mom would always choose my brother over me and it hurts. My brother grew up not having a lot friends but really sweet and genuine ones. But that wasn't the case for me. I grew up with the mean selfish kind who had their own issues to resolve. So i never ranted out on them anytime. And she thought and always used to say i am getting influenced by them when i clearly wasn't. I was always made to do the house chores while my brother slept, i was always shouted at, and abused physically. I would have my phone being checked regularly and i didn't get ANY privacy. I just wished that maybe one day she would change but she never did. And now anytime she would hug me or sit close to me, i would always back off or feel awkward because i had gotten used to the feeling of being away...
My mom left me and my dad when I was 3, and she rarely keeps in contact with me. she abandoned my and I feel like its my fault she left, cause that's how my dad made me feel after she left.
Dark sad
I love my mom
i will never raise my kids like my parents raised me.
"From this moment on don't call me mom"
I am lucky i have really a great mother 💜💜
eleven watching this:
Actually I ended up I never wanted to be
My mom is both physically and verbally abusive and every time I thought it was getting better it became horrible again
My mother hurt me Soo much and shes always telling me how I'll never be good enough
I really need to belive That my Mom wants me cuz every day That pasa feels like he es pushing me away And i dont wanna hate her cuz its my mom and i Will love her besides everything
when something gets lost she blames me she blames everything on me i just wish she would just be proud of me
A letter to my mom:
You know, i really really wish I had a close bond with you. Alot of kids around me tell me so many wonderful stories about their mothers and I get jealous. I wish you could see me for I am. I wish you would treat me like a normal person and not just some random person. Everyday I wake up to go to school I always wish you don't wake up until I leave for school because once you do, your words will slice through my heart and ruin my day. You tell me how I know nothing, I'm dirty, I'm a dog, how useless I am sometimes...you love to manipulate me and gaslight me and make me feel so bad. Every time I couldn't hold it in anymore, I would cut myself in places no one could see...I hid my scares for so many years. When I'm not okay, you tell me to stop having an attitude and you continue to bad mouth me in front of my younger brother....what is he going to think of me when he is older? Huh? The one person who is supposed to know me doesn't. For goodness sakes I'm not even close to my father, but even he knows me better than you ever did. He understands, you don't. The way you used to beat me until I was black and blue, I lost my love and trust for you, and I replaced it with fear and distrust. How can I be happy at this place I call home? I don't tell you most of what I want to tell you because every time I did, you would brush it off or criticize me for it...can't I just be good enough for you to at least treat me better? But its okay tho, I got used to it, I lived with it, and I promise you, I'm going to be the mother you never were, I'm going to love my kids so much like you never did, I'm going to be a MOTHER. I'm moving out very soon, and I have never been more excited or happier. Hope you become a better person tho, I really hope so.
every wrong thing my younger sibling does always ends up as my fault in my mother's eyes
" you are worthless" she says. all I want is for her to say "am proud of you"
but after all the mental abuse all these years I still want her to love me I still struggle to get her love, I keep on asking my self am not good enough or am not even good at all. PLEASE WHAT SHOULD I DO.
its crazy that even though our moms can cause us pains we would still love them and take care of them
My mom hates me because of a guy she never said it but it's pretty obvious in the way she treats me versus her other kids. My sister too , that wss the perfect guy for them and I just found another way to ruin it for them.....I wished they believed me.....
I was 3 and she left on my birthday she was supposed to be there for me and my brothers it has been 10 years.
Sorry if I’m late on this but my mom left me and came back when I turned eleven didn’t even show up on my birthday it was about years past by and didn’t even get me something for my birthday didn’t even said happy birthday daughter hope you have a great birthday and ever came back ever seen the on the holidays because she always come and don’t no more and she moved back in and her and my dad argue a lot lately and I just want to ran away from them. Because they broke me and hurt my feelings like it’s my fault and they are the problem that my heart is broken
All i wanted from her was to put me and my sisters first before any man and to believe in us sighhhh like mom i needed you but you werent here
She never did love me. All she did was watch horror movies with her boyfriend while I was on the other side of the couch crying. I craved her attention and affection. I never did hear a "I love you" from her. I was always jealous and hated her boyfriend since he was the one that always got the attention. I understand that she was going through a hard time and she wants quite mature that age but. I was still here. And I needed you there for me. What did I do to make you not love me? Then she left when I was 6. My grandparents were the ones taking care of me while you were spending time with your boyfriend. I just wanted you to love me and care for me. That's all I asked.
You should care about my dreams , about me , treat me like your daughter , physically abused all my childhood ….i never talked about that until today
But my father. He just scolds my mom for ntg
it's werid how the person who's supposed to love you like in books and in movies but she's the one who makes u feel as if though you're never enough. werid werid
My mom had me pretty young she married my dad because she got pregnant after I was born I turned 8 and she would party with her friends till 5am and I would hear them fighting it was hard and she wasn’t there for me I was never good enough
I'm having a hard time keeping everything together and she just abandoned me alone in this house for a few years. It's very hard, God, I feel like giving up.
My mother is very controlling she would comment on my weight saying "I'm as fat as a cow and a pig" then force me to eat two big plates full of food, she would pull me by my hair and force my to drop onto my knees as she dragged me all around the house by my hair and hit me with a broom on my back, I was later diagnosed with rotoscoliosis and have had it for 4 years now after we found out she stop hitting the broom onto my back and instead would punch and kick it, she would put all her weight on my whenever it was time for bed ( because we slept on the same bed till I was like 10 or 11 ) while I would be given very little space and slept between the wall and my mother she would also lock me in the bathroom for hours whenever I needed non physical" discipline" and threaten to hit me if I turned on the lights ( little to no lights whatsoever could be seen in there ) I later developed I fear of the dark and fear of tight spaces, she would force me to go out with her often and while getting ready she would start to get angry for insignificant things that would lead to her hitting and pulling my hair if this does not happen before we leave then after we arrive for sometime later she would hit and verbally abuse me for a tiny imperfection whether it be smiling to much at people, not smiling enough, talking,not talking, laughing, sitting down, not sitting down, crying whenever she would harshly squeeze and pull me and more a year later I would have minor panic attacks whenever I would have to go out, she would lie about me to family, friends even strangers she also enjoyed humiliating me in public and yell out lies resulting in people staring at me while whispering among themselves later had a fear of people and large crowds, I started self harming and became extremely suicidal and she found out about one of three failed attempts she hit me nonstop the night my cousin left ( my cousin was there when she found out so she couldn't do anything to me that moment ) and said for me to stop being a baby and an attention seeker and just actually kill myself throwing razors in front of me saying she can do it for me if I want and I was later put under suicide watch, she tried to get me a bunch of different medications saying things like how I was bipolar and had severe anger issues and that I was crazy mind you she gave me medications three times a day at the ripe age of 3 because I had to " behave good " and now have messed up nerves and memory, she would force me to hug her but push or hit me if I ever tried to do it of my own free will, I got molested alot and by another of people and she just said she went throughworse cause only her brother molested her plus that same brother would peek on me while I would change or sleep I can't have people touch me or I start to freak out even if it's my grandparents that always defended me from her the longest I can hug them or let them hug my is like 2-3 minutes...
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... so- yeah half of my life but shorter version 🧍💃
She called me fatty . Slut. Whore. Bodyshamming me. Abused me. Physically and mentally. She always hate me. Every little thing i do. Shes hate those things. She never understand me . Always saying i was a mistake. Never support me. Always my other siblings not me. Even though I am the younger kid. She always left me in my worst and when I'm healing she come back and ruin my life again . She said I don't deserve anything . I don't deserve to be happy. She always cursed me . I don't know what I hv done for getting treating this shit
I’m in debt and work my ass off getting a fucking bachelors in bio and I’m still not enough. I’m still a failure to her, even the smallest thing that brings me joy she yells at me for doing or says it’s immature. I still can’t sleep cause I feel like suck a waste of space, I still want to just go to sleep and not wake up. I’ve never felt at home where i was raised where I should feel the most nostalgic and love.
I just wanted to be loved. I wanted the little things. A kiss on the cheek, a pat on the back, to be cuddled, hugs, TO BE ENOUGH! TO BE PROTECTED FROM MY RAPIST! TO BE PROTECTED! BUT NO! NOW I NEED PROTECTION FROM HER! AND EVERYONE ELSE IN THIS GOD DAMN WORLD! I don’t understand what I did or didn’t do to deserve all this absolute SHIT I’ve had to deal with since I was 10 FUCKING YEARS OLD!
My mom has not lived with me in 8 years I'm in high school and she asked me how I did at school that day the one time I saw her I told her good and she ask if I had strate a's when I told her no she asked why not and I said idk the reason is because I'm in advanced classes and struggling my ass off just to try to make a passing grade and all I ever wanted was for her to be proud once but instead I had token care of her for years then got forgot about any chance she got
Never did i see a role model and that hurt 7 year old me
My Mother was an alcoholic. Mean fucking drunk. She would beat me constantly. The last time I’ve ever seen her was in the courtroom sentencing her for life in jail. She would have parole after serving 25 years.
My mom won't a perfect daughter in every way see expecting me to be a barbie doll but I am nothing like a girl i more like a tomboy
I just wanted to make you happy even when you make me the exact opposite
I was aware how my mom works hard for me and my younger siblings she was always so unfair to me when it comes to me because i am the eldest and im a girl so i have to be responsible but all i get is to be scolded all she see and my so called family see is my mistake i have never heard her say im proud of you instead she compares me to teens my age who already has a child she always see my wrong doings but when it comes to my younger brother and my half sister she always tolerates them stating they are still young their younger than u so you should understand them as the eldest, i mean how could i ever get myself to understand them when even my younger siblings talk shit about me she said their still kids is ther any kids who know how to talk back and talk shit about their older sibling right in front of their face? Kids ? Their still kids ? My younger brother who is about to become a high school student this school and my younger sister who is about to be 7 y.o who knows how to do make up and cry when things dont go her way like my younger brother, my mom even compared and complained to me about my father who cheated on her and when she needed money for us for school and other expenses he always finds shity excuses she said don't make it too obvious that your just like your good for nothing lazy father she even said in the past that if its ok to kill a child she would have killed me along time ago when i was a baby if she knew i would be like this she even said that im like a pig u know cuz pig only know to eat and sleep well sorry if im like a pig even physical appearance looks like one to my mother every i do is not enough and will never be enough but she is always so supportive towards my younger siblings cuz well they need attention more that i do i guess , i guess she just literally forgot that she still have an another daughter even when i became a consistent honor she just said ok work hard so that u will still be an honor next quarter , she left me om my own to take care of myself at home so that she could watch over my siblings, she always complains to me how she is very tired from work bot knowing that im dying mentally and emotionally i needed her i need my mom but for my mom im too much , i needed my mom but she only looks at my younger siblings not me. Whenever im at home i always fell and i always know that i dont belong hear but it pains me more when even my mother makes me feel that way , anyway i cant even rely on my father he has his own family and children to take care of i dont even know if he also supports his other children from his past wives im still a minor but i cant even rely on any of my parents and i always fell like im nothing but a shit here at home luckyly i still have my bestfriend who is like an older sister to me to sympathize with me because of her horrible father who didn't want her cuz she is a girl and always finds fault at her for no reason and her mother who could do nothing but tolerate her behaviour. Whenever im at home i always feal like im nothing but a useless piece of garbage none of my whole family knows that i suffer from stress, depression, im not sure about anxiety none of them knows except my bestfriend who knows me better than anyone else
Me siento tan sola y triste y encima ahora ellos me ponen triste..solo tengo a mi padre? LOS DEMÁS DE MI FAMILIA TIENEN A OTROS Y YO?? NO QUIERO HACERME LA VÍCTIMA PERO NO SERÍA YO LA MÁS TRISTE?:(
I just want her to know that I'm trying
I always do my best but my parents never satisfied because they had a son ( a person who is very important for my parents) and they always treat him like a prince , but they never love me because I am a girl 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
I understand how this feels I wish my mother would actually care about me I always feel unwanted from her she doesn't care how I feel all the time I just want to commute suicide and I can't deal with my mother anymore I know suicide is not the answer but people don't understand I yell at my mom cuz I don't live with her she chooses to be rude pic favorites and make all of us depressed and she got the oldest depressed and that's me I have two brothers and one sister my little sister is 11 my oldest brother is seven and the youngest one I have of my brothers he is sex and I can't deal with my life with my mother anymore I don't know what to do!!!
my mom does everything to make my life horrible all she cares abt is her bf she ruined me my dad ruined me i hate it here
Pls someone tell me the name of 1:24
I hate my mom
Me to 💔😞
actually I really doesn't hate my mom, she's good but for just once I wanna listen from her mouth "YOU DID GREAT I AM PROUD OF YOU" not every time like she said "I AM TIRED IF YOU OR I AM REALLY DISAPPOINTED ON U."
i can't say this infront of her but I wanna say here
"MOM.... PLEASE DONT BE DISAPPOINTED AT ME...I DID AS YOU WISH I DID EVERYTHING! EVERYTIME AS YOU TOLD ME! YOU TOLD ME GIVE ME GOOD GRADES I CAME WITH 70%+ AS YOU WANT MOM I DID BUT THE DISAPPOINTED LOOK IN YOUR FACE STILL MAKE ME DOUBT ON MYSELF! WHAT DID I DO WRONG THAT AGAIN! AGAIN THAT Disappointed' LOOK BUT NOT THE 'PROUD' LOOK! BELIEVE ME MOM I STAY AWAKE COUNTLESS NIGHT TO GET GOOD GRADES EVERYTIME CAUSE FOR ONE THING 'PROUD'IN YOUR FACE FOR ME. WHEN TOU SAID GO SOCIALISE WITH PEOPLE MORE KNOWING I HAVE SOCIAL ANXIETY I STILL DID CAUSE I WANT YOU TO DONT LOOK DOWN ON ME! I TRIED MOM I REALLY TRIED BUT NOTHING HELPED! PLEASE GOD PLEASE MAKE MY MOM TRUST FOR ME SOMETIME A LITTLE MORE PLEASE WAIT A LITTLE I PROMISE I WILL MAKE HER PROUD ON ME! PLEASE I AM TRYING TO BE SO STRONG! IDC IF I AM LOSING MYSELF OR NOT! BUT I WANT The PROUD LOOK PLEASE "
actually I got admitted in school at the age of 2 cause i started talking earlier and started studying hard instead of Playing happily with other kids. when I had to play happily and enjoy my childhood o actually studied my ass of...that's hurts that i really doesn't enjoy my childhood
I wish I never gave birth to you she said to me when I needed her the most
Hurt people hurt people. Our mother's were hurt and hurting from their own Demons . Don't forget that generational mental illness is real. Look deeply into the past of most parents and you will see that it's pasted down pain. I didn't do right by my own children and I know this and I apologize for the life that they have lived. I am broken inside for them, for Me, for my mother. I'm sure that my mother died with regrets and I know that I will die with same regrets.
😓
You know my mother hada mental illness and she wasn't fir to be a.mother and she didn't really raise. Us more robin and my dad. And she didn't even want us. I know it wasn't her fault but its still hurts
She'd look me in the eyes and tell me she wish that she aborted me. And all I wish is for to love me even if it little.
Makes me wonder how a mum could hate her kid that much
why didnt i just die when i was born all these years of suffering my way of loving my parents My father barely new me since he went to prison for a couple times maybey this is a punishment
My mom she have one on her side not mine...