How to Win a Political Argument | Tania Israel | TEDxSanLuisObispo
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 30 มิ.ย. 2021
- Dr. Tania Israel is a psychologist and research who looks at data to understand how people think. She explores the concept that winning an argument is not about asserting one's position, but rather about strengthening a connection. Tania Israel is a Professor in the Department of Counseling, Clinical, and School Psychology at the University of California, Santa Barbara. She holds a Ph.D. in Counseling Psychology and is a Fellow of the American Psychological Association. Dr. Israel teaches about helping skills, leadership, and community collaboration, among other things. She has facilitated educational programs and difficult dialogues about a range of topics, including abortion, law enforcement, religion, and sexual orientation. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at www.ted.com/tedx
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Caring, Empathy and mutual understanding. Coming at a common ground and look at the conversation like a discussion and not like a Debate.
Except in the US, where two pretty much identical right wing ideologies thing they are opposites and don't listen to each other.
IM NOT LISTENING LALALALALALALA. I can lalala to the starwars anthem too. La la lalalalaaaa la lalalalalaaaaa la lalalaaaaa
Yeah word all the way! Or at least, we should polish or redefine the meaning of “debate”
Most people are afraid to admit what they don't know.
The only way to get there is through honest conversation.
Doing this on the internet is a failed proposition.
Some random person jumps into the conversation and starts yelling "Your wrong" derailing the conversation.
Honest conversation, where you both admit what you don't know, you both admit what you actually want to solve.
But there are also people that believe they are right and will not give up on that belief.
Shout louder than them and insult their rather large mother
Thank you for your TED Talk 👍
@@sunMMVIII You’re welcome!
😅
I like her book, Beyond Your Bubble. It has been helpful.
More people need to watch this
As a aspiring politician this helps a lot, for i want to be a honest good politician who'll listen to the complains of the people, Age 16.
"winning is not asserting position, but strengthening connection"
The fact that a debate/argument nowadays is something you can "win" instead of serving to come to a mutual better understanding of each other's point of view is why I have lost all faith in ever having proper discourse again. Add to the fact that most people do not argue rationally but emotionally, that they are almost always convinced that their notion is the "correct" one and that they will cling to it screaming and clawing in the face of counterpoints because that's easier than having to challenge and potentially change your own perspective, and any sense of having an actual debate is lost. No wonder ad hominem and other fallacies are becoming more and more the norm.
It is okay not to win everytime. Its called growing up.
No, israelis cant loose. Its called Sionism.
It's not about winning.. We're talking about your brain's logical frame of thinking. If you are "losing", then you obviously haven't thought it through.
@@calholli that is correct, and corrupted.
Wow…this Ted Talk arrived JUST at the right time. Unbelievable! THANK YOU TANIA ISRAEL!
I appreciate your willingness to encourage one to listen to the"uncle" as that is how communication succeeds. I am that uncle you speak of and I always welcome that conversation.
I think you’re missing the point of her talk - it is precisely how to engage in a dialogue and understanding of one another
The only way to win the game is to not play!
Or change the rules of the game
😂😂😂 I love your idea lol
Or brute force. It's not a valid argument, but always worked trough history.
@@ThatGoat brute force requires either time or a lot of resources
@@lolhead7127 But it is the ultimate argument.
The fact you think you need to win instead of finding a common ground is the issue.
we just all need to go out into the world and accumulate as many different experiences as we can in order to become a more well rounded human beings, too many people stay inside of their circle and never step out to meet new ideas, seek discomfort!
This needs to go viral, NOW!
Absolutely perfect demonstration! Thank you!
Some people believe you win by simply saying "Cope" and "Seethe"
The only way to get the best of an argument is to avoid it.
It might work if you don't wanna establish a connection with ur opposition.
People don't care unless they see you care, very brilliant! Thank you!
Honestly, this is what I already do. But others tend to think I’m trying to debate and they get upset with me. I know it’s probably because I usually have the unpopular opinion. But, this is the BEST method because it keeps you sane and calm. And if someone is trying to start an argument while you’re calm, you already won!
Winning is the problem.. winning is when 2 sides are mutual; give and get, anything else is just one side labeling the other irrational.
Winning is when both sides come to an agreement. Otherwise they're just in a loop
This sounds great in theory.
But in practice no! Exactly the same thing happens in communism...in theory it sounds good, but in reality it's horrible!
@@flavius8278 preach brother
… until your life is threatened
@@flavius8278 That is because most people don't have a clue about what communism entails....
Choose family relationships over being "right"!
That uncle and I would get along
How to win any argument: "I'm offended".
This is so timely. Thank you for this.
After 30 seconds I could see where this was going.
Where?
@@ragulshan6490 no where fast!
Beliefs and opinions are just that, they are not facts. The trouble is, facts are ignored or dismissed based on beliefs.
Fact is always according to someone or some source. Logic is just what it is, it's universal.
@Dean McLain You're right
@Dean McLain What I had in mind is, even scientific facts can be challenged. In fact, it must be falsifiable for it to be considered scientific. Beliefs on the other hand are set in stone and can't be questioned. Sometimes people are so adamant in defending their "facts" and undermine the importance of reasoning--they just want to stick to the "facts" no matter what. These are the people who often are fighting each other. Their way of thinking is fundamentally the same, twisted and dogmatic.
@Born an Atheist just based on simple curiosity. I have nothing to defend. lmao. there are two types of people in the world, problem makers and peace makers. problem makers are both science defenders and religious bigots, fighting each other, using and squeezing everyone else in the middle.
@Born an Atheist I'm not saying to actually reason things into truth, but just to entertain a possibility as true. it doesn't have to be actually true in the end. I'm not saying to dismiss facts either, I'm mainly concerned about the *attitude* people are having in regards to facts. That's all.
nah, this ain't it.
there's a clear right and wrong on certain of these issues.
Totally agree with you. It's a good psychological trick when you argue with your appointments. Thank you
wow really insightful!
holy carp, I didn't know i needed this so much
Assuming the other person is rational. Most people are too triggered and lack anger awareness.
Or too myopic in their social views to understand life beyond their front door.
*most americans
Hello
@@olaf2046 100% on point. PS. I like the Superman Tshirt. Have one too!
Humans arguing is the only reason we got anywhere. It is to strive to perfection and invention. To surpass that which we thought already good enough.
i feel like whenever i make an effort of having a discussion, the other person cuts me off instead of listening to me... and perhaps i do that as well now that i think about it Lol
Greetings to you dear
I like how you display your confirmation bias in your example for confirmation bias.
Lol
I thought that things like rocks and sticks don’t have confirmation bias but I might be wrong about that.
Could you add subtitles, please, because sometimes it's really hard to follow, yes, I speak English, but sometimes I miss it. Thank you for sharing, by the way, 😊
Hi! You may click on the cc button below the video/player. That is for subtitles, or closed captions. Hope this helps.
Thanks for your talk, it was interesting to hear, especially considering my sociology background. Now, I have just written my Msc thesis on political discrimination. I am curious to know what you think of this: if everybody is affected by this confirmation bias (and we largely underestimate the extent to which we are in fact influenced), how can we classify something or someone as 'extreme'? In fact, how can we even make any plausible assumptions about politics in general?
oooh noo… im scared of what the comment section is gonna look like
Excellent
To win is to tell the TRUTH for the truth will set you FREE
No one can truly be a good judge without hearing both sides. Unfortunately the young are idealistic. Unfortunately the old become set in their ways.
This feels like a skipped stone over the surface of a deep pond. I am curious to know if the speaker believes in any form of objective reality?
I agree, but the problem is that sometimes objectivity is also not so objective.
For flat earthers they are the ones who are "objective". I'm not saying I think they are right, but not matter how many of our facts we show them they believe we are not objective. And in some debates, we are probably the "flat earthers" but don't know about it.
agreed but what i got from this is no matter how objective the reality, perception of that reality differs so greatly that it will make no difference how many times you say the sky is blue if the other person is color blind
The situation she uses as an example also has the two parties start with a base, familial connection and something shared. This does make things a lot easier. Between strangers, I would agree this kind of interaction would be very unlikely, unless some common ground is established first and a connection is formed. And we all know how difficult it can often be to form a connection with strangers, especially on the internet.
there is objective reality, but it's pointless to discuss with anyone who claims to have all of it already.
Great talk! Simple but profound. and Dr Israel explains it with such clarity.
Her very first example was based on politics and media influence. Having assumptions and conflicting ideas bundled in is EXACTLY THE PROBLEM with our we think about things. I can believe all people should be treated with respect... period! Both of those labels create more divide, paranoia, anxiety and defensiveness.
Corrupt media/politicians wouldn't have a job or income if we stopped taking this bait to fight each other (insert any group on any topic people are passionate about). We could also spend more energy on productive cooperation, rather than pointless and time-wasting arguing about assumptions, things taken out-of-context, hyperbole, gas-lighting, logical fallacies...
So this woman is equivocating.
First off, there is a “fact of the matter”. Two people can agree, disagree, or have no opinion on a subject but there is always a fact about what is or is not true of a given subject. That truth is independent of whether we agree with it or not.
So sure, my uncle can say that racism doesn’t exist but he is in fact false. Or my brother can say that more equity would improve everyone’s quality of life but he is in fact false.
And what would be worse than “losing” an argument with someone who never intended to argue but instead planned to vomit already regurgitated views at you, would be to ascribe those views with the same value and respect as well-informed, well-articulated views.
If you want to win a political argument, start by making sure it’s an argument. Are both people willing to accept that they may be wrong not only about the situations they see but also the facts and morals that ground them? If yes then have a healthy argument and talk about what you learned. If no, just don’t engage. The lack of frustration is winning in itself.
And you missed the point of this entirely. She is not equivicating. If you listened to the last few minutes of her talk, she is detailing how if you are gonna engage in such conversations, having an understanding of what the other side thinks and feels is the way to break down their straw man/walls to them understanding what they are saying is divisive and not constructive. It's a tactic to use what they know against them to get your point across constructively and without them losing face in the process.
How to win a political argument. Use facts, data, and real world observation. Also use well thought questions to their positions. If facts ( like 2+2=4 type facts ) arent listened to and rational qestions arent allowed then you arent dealing with rational people. Dont associate with irrational people.
I reckon I probably am a zealous fanatic spouting radical ideas or something similar.
Correct answer is: NO politics
Quite interesting though to see how much deflection of this concept there is in the comments. Dr Israel, maybe your next talk needs to be not show, but why.
1st impression bias is a muh
my money is on the uncle.
I didn't like the title since winning a political argument isn't about the "how", its about what you're standing for and if logically it makes sense in the world and so on...
I did like the total message though, of having a discussion that expands each others thoughts which strengthens the connection between family like with your uncle like she said...
❤️❤️❤️
How about just agree that everyone should and needs to be treated equal and not get into what slogans and stuff should or shouldnt be used. Why segregate people with things like this, we need to focus on bringing everyone together not rip them apart even more.
You kinda missed the point lol
Floating arms
👋
Ma'am, I've "conversed" a LOT about BLM, and you chose the wrong topic to use as an example. As soon as you touch on abortion - in any context - as BLM does, (in America) while in conversation with an evangelical Christian, there is only empty explosion. #1 Rule for participating in an argument - DON'T HAVE ONE WITH ANYONE WHOSE MIND IS CLOSED. Research also shows that having rational informational conversations with people whose minds are closed pushes them further and further into their beliefs/delusions.
wanting to win a political debate will just turn into selfish gains of ego and pride imo. you state your political views bc you believe in those views to be true and beneficial, regardless if it’s fun or not and not bc it will boost your ego at the end.
First you have to hold the right opinion. There are right answers in life. There is always a lesser of two evils.
I don’t think there’s an objectively correct answer to “which flavor of ice cream tastes the best?”
@@calvinaccount1339 Sample the human population to find out their ice cream preferences. Control for all other variables. You can now objectively say which ice cream humans like best. Ta da!
@@HelloThere-xx1ct well i don't agree. if to me chocolate ice cream tastes the best it tastes the best, but only for me. it is my truth that it tastes the best since it's regulated by my taste senses and then it is processed by my brain and so to me it feels the best. but let's say now that we have a wall in front of us and it's obviously blue. you're saying it's blue while i'm convinced it's yellow. now in that situation there wouldn't be "personal truth". there could be only universal truth and personal illusion. unfortunately, that's how many people live today, they live in their chosen illusion while ignoring the facts.
@@HelloThere-xx1ct that's not even true because individual human taste buds change slightly every millisecond. So, you would have a good idea of what that person liked at that specific time, multiplied by billions.
@@CultureCrossed64 I'm gonna challenge your claim that humans tastes change that much and add in a time component to the sampling to account for this variable. We will conduct a 100 year study and that should allow us to start charting any changes in taste in our sample population. Again I'm just trying to find the ice cream that the average human has the best chance of saying that flavor is their favorite.
Refuse to speak about politics! Game won!
Facts
just let communists rule, raise your children into state dependency mindset, and withdraw from all controversy! you won! yey
@@samanthaqiu3416 cancel culture
When people like that woman from this video start talking about politics they are suddenly getting toxic!
Greetings to you dear
I have arguments all the time on a range of subjects and there are these great things called "facts" which often help me to win. Like, the Earth is round, the Hillsborough disaster was covered up by the Police and The Sun newspaper, there were no weapons of mass destruction, etc
I need more weed, to listen to this...
I win all political arguments by telling people I am a political atheist and I don’t believe in bullish!t.
Did she describe democrats as the Left?
Fr
That... is what they are? And Republicans are the Right? That's how the US works? There's a difference between the left and leftist
@@CultureCrossed64 not necessarily
@@plumbell67 I guess it depends on who you ask. I've seen a few discussions on this the past few days
💖🌞🕊️💛🏆
The way she acts like pro life vs pro choice is comparable to palestine vs Israel proves that eventhough she claims to benevolently understand the political situation she cant actually understand facts
i understand.
She's talking about human psychology here.
@@MrRhetorikill my point is that she makes out as if all disputes are opinion and political ideology which is clearly not the case
Hum first hum first 😂
I first came here to listen to her and saw her hair 😍😍😍😍
This will never work in the real world. Unfortunately, people just don't care anymore.
Democrat or Republican i don't care anymore just don't screw up the economy.
My mom and dad were all ways told me the truth know matter what I might believe in or not believe,and I have learned from the best and I am so mad at the one that is called critical theory and I don't want myself or my children to learn this one in the school and come back home and then have a fight. Please understand that we have to be able to pray about this one message from you guys and gal's.
God bless us all people 🙂.
just curious, why are you mad at Critical Race Theory, what about it angers you?
Omg
Andh bhakt:let me introduce myself
I have found that shaming and demonizing the opponent is not a way to win any argument, political or not, but simply being right actually is.
Who would've thunk?
Yeah but how do you grind them into the dirt so they scream for their mommy
Wow, I learned absolutely nothing new from this Ted Talk
Or maybe you're wrong, and your uncle is right.
I know for certain that my uncle is left handed
⚡ 🚀 🎯 🌀 🔊 🌊
Oooh, I thought the one who yells loudest wins.
First like
This is an unbelievable performance. This is also a real ideology. I think she also believes this… I know it sounds crazy, but I really think that she does. I think she might not be acting. Hear me out, I don’t think she was trying to be funny.
Change the premise and insult their grammar?
I deal with it like I do my ex wife. I'm not arguing LALALALALALALA
Unless your arguing with a trump supporter
"All lives matter" - is wrong.. Well, well...
Lol the argument is over a catchphrase by a scam organization?
Sounds great in theory but say that to Nazis or Communists in the 40s. There is a thing like objective reality and objective BAD political views and Standpoints and sometimes a shift in viewpoints of a population leads to above stated horrifics.
Gaslight and play linguistic games, of course. The left is very good at this.
Just sounds like a centrist who thinks that “all sides are valid”
Sounds like you didn't watch the video
@@CultureCrossed64 I did I just disagree that there is no objective right or wrong. But calling her a centrist is kinda silly I’ll admit I was just trying to insult
@@plumbell67 it happens. Sometimes we are just in bad moods, we are all only human after all
The concept of everyone wins is ideal but unrealistic on numerous levels. Thus this video is relevant in theory but useless in reality
Free Palestinian
You start by not having israel in your name
Bad taste but ok
How to win a political argument? Good luck on that. When emotion over-rules facts and logic, there is no way to 'win' an argument. Emotion closes off all forms of listening and any sense of rationality. And could the speaker possibly be anymore condescending in the presentation? Judging from her comments and tone, I'm going to guess a CA left winger.