A PR company asked me whether I would call myself a hag last month; here are my thoughts
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 1 ม.ค. 2025
- 🌿 I am a textile artist, gardener, writer and teacher based in the middle of Scotland. This is my website www.snapdragonlife.com
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In this week's Friday Film I'm talking about role models for middle aged women, toxic consumerism and recommending some books.
Here are the links and details of things I mentioned.
Twisted Twee twistedtwee.co.uk
Anna Funder : Wifedom
Sharon Blackie: Hagitude
Phillippa Gregory Normal Women
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I follow “Danu’s Irish Herb Garden”, another amazing example of the hen wife/mother archetype. I love Kate at the last Homely House as well. The lack of respect and acknowledgment of women our age to our culture , is the real loss of our culture. Wise women, educated women are looked at with suspicion. In our history, burned at the stake if herbalists, eccentrics, etc, and thought of as witches. Love you for not engaging in hag labeling and having great self-respect! You are a wonderful role model of living a rich life
Thank you. I’ll check out that channel - always good to have recommendations. We women are in a majority - the way we have given away our power is astonishing. X
Very interesting chat and I'm am really enjoying your videos. The removal of women from the historical narrative goes way beyond art, of course, and the lack of middle aged and older women as role models continues. Largely, I think, because of the terrible online trolling that targets women who do not agree with the "lets do everything (and spend more money) to look younger, prettier, thinner etc" brigade, and who dare to share their opinions about anything. Mary Beard is a good example - an expert in her field of classics, a brilliant educator and presenter but someone who has suffered awful comments and insults about her appearance. Thanks for the books you mentioned - I will definitely be looking those up :)
I think that we all need to counteract it - by supporting writers, broadcasters, artists, everyone who is showing up as themselves. We are in a majority so really there is no excuse for allowing it to happen.
Though I believe Trolls themselves should be ignored until they shrivel up due to lack of attention. X
Whoever came up with that hashtag was (wild guess) not a middle-aged woman. How many at our age would consider themselves an "archetype" and not a whole, unique individual packed full of unique life experiences, and unique ambitions yet to fulfil? Far from thinking there is no more need for feminism, as I've been told by women older and younger than me, I must still maintain the rage - as I've done since young adolescence. In any story, switch the genders and see how it sounds, how credible is it. If that jars, there's a spot for feminism! So glad to have you on YT Jane, that and Bealtaine Cottage are weekly highlights.
The need for feminism has never been greater - xxx
I loved your peeling back and exploration of this stage in our lives as women. Loved it, you were gentle, patient and so intelligent in your exploration. Love your channel.
Thank you so much Joanne x.
I feel offended by that word. I think of myself as an elder, maybe something of a witch, certainly a country woman with lots of those interests and skills, and lots of life experience. I maybe wrong, but I feel the word hag, like crone, a derogatory term, a label, instigated by men, afraid of the power and knowledge of older women whose wisdom was necessarily passed on without literacy, and as such seen as anti establishment. Incidentally I am also a well educated woman of 67 years. I will not be labelled by anyone, let alone a PR company! I choose my own identity. I really like your channel. Thanks for the content.
Thank you. I think there have been a lot of women drawn to reclaiming the word to take the sting out of it - but I can think of much better words, like elder as you say (though I personally feel I’m not there yet - so much more to learn).
Oh I adored this. So glad you decided upon TH-cam. Utterly inspiring and your usual joyful take on what’s chucked at us. 60 in a few days and thrilled to be alive.
Huge thanks Jane
❤❤❤❤❤
Thanks Treeza. Happy birthday when it comes. X
Just found your channel. I just turned 55 and appreciate your perspective.
Thank you Jennifer x
We can always count on you to be eloquent. And spot on. Callin' em like you see em, Jane. Keep up the good work.
Aw thank you 😘
Thats very thought provoking, Its interesting & rather sad thats how men see us,
We have so much more to give x
It was actually a 100% female team! X
@@snapdragonlife That's unbelievable Jane x
That really made me laugh Jane !& as usual you took the time to ponder on all things related & came up with a suitable solution your just great !
Thanks Gill. I’m glad you enjoyed it x
Thank you dear lady, another great chat. I wish I could sit in your kitchen and talk with you over tea xxxx
Wouldn’t that be lovely. X
First frost here in S Wales - need to go out and check what’s survived as I wasn’t prepared 😮
Fingers crossed for you. We’ve had light occasional frosts here for a few weeks but, until yesterday, they were so mild that there was t much damage.
Phew! I thought it was just me being a hen wife all these years (and loving it, I'm 70). There are more of us out there. I am looking forward to listening to your book recommendations on Audible. Thank you. Your little vase of flowers are sublime, the perfect touch 😊.
Thank you. One thing I have loved most about the internet is linking up with all the other ‘hen wives before their time’. X
I was excited to see you had a new video up. I missed seeing you. I am going to look up you book recommendations. We need more women on TH-cam like you! BTW, I am also 55 🙂 oh the hen life! love this.
This is such a brilliant clip! How the human race survived the past 900’years astonishes me xxx
It is astonishing. Best advice I got when I brought baby Zoë back from the hospital was from my Dad ‘they are designed to be brought up in caves’.
This was very interesting Jane. I haven't read Hagitude but I do follow Sharon Blackie on substack. I laughed when you said you'd been a hen wife since you were 25. When I was that age, my friends would joke that I was an old lady "trapped" in a young body, due to loving sewing, knitting, baking etc. Now in my 50s my body is starting to relate to my inner self! Your take on capitalism on women is true I think. I'll definitely read the books you've mentioned. Your podcast is one of my favourites.♡
Thank you so much Kate x
Thank you Jane, this is inspirational. I wish I lived near to you so I could pop into your kitchen for a brew and a chat!
Wouldn’t that be lovely x
Another great video and chat .....thsnks Jane. I really enjoyed Sharon Blackies book too and like you identify with Henwife since my 20s!! Your chat was so thoughtful . There are so many positives to this time in life . I think shining from within and doing what you love and being creative .....and hens of course are just a few of the things to celebrate the hag years ❤
Thanks Tania. I am missing the hens!
Thankyou, I am 64 and I found this inspiring.xx🐝🐝
I’m so glad x
This was EXACTLY the message I needed to hear this morning, thank you x
I’m so glad 😘😘
I shouted out “oh no you didn’t “ when you said what they said in the email, honestly they try and turn everything into something commercial, it’s ridiculous. So I have been calling the hen wife a hedge witch, I think it’s the same thing, maybe without chickens, in Lisa Listers book called Witch, she explains each one and I resonate most with that. Despite not living on the edge of a forest yet!
I think that they are probably very similar - and while I resist being labelled as anything I think it’s actually to do with the energy we give off and mine is usually a one of pottering and muttering and making things. X
I have ordered Normal Women’. I am so looking forward to reading it. Fascinating video. Thank you Jane.
Thanks Sally x
Greetings from Nehalem, Oregon, USA. I'm a 74 yr young Watercolor Artist. I have 2 daughters your age. The term Hag is offensive.. Side note: I LOVE your youtube channel. I watch your Naples trip over and over again. You are charming and calming. Best to you.
Thank you so much Rayanne x
That was a lovely chat - I shall check out the books you mentioned and although I am 12 years older I don't identify as a hag😅 whilst eschewing high heels and push up bras 😂😂😂 big love from East of Scotland ❤
Thanks Margaret x
Such a great video! ‘Age does not define me’ is a phrase I use often. I am a textile artist who this year at age 70 began a new TH-cam series. It is growing in a way that I didn’t expect but is extremely affirming and the response globally has been wonderful. I had the courage to do this partly because we have some great examples of women artists on TH-cam aged 50+ such as Kathryn Chambers, Jeri Bellini, Ariane Zurcher and now you! I will check out the books you mentioned also 😊😊
Thank you. I shall go and check out your channel. Xx
Just watched love it Thank you x
Thank you x
Hi Jane, that is absolutely everything I needed to hear this morning, including what I didn’t know I needed to hear, loved it!
I’m so glad Catherine 😘
Interesting approach.....I'd have kicked into the long grass too xxx
Pr are missing a great opportunity with the vast swathe of the population who are in their 50s/prime❤
I think it’s madness really!
Thank you for another thought provoking chat. Have you been looking at my notifications list on You tube? The only one I haven’t looked at is unexpected gypsy. I also think Kate at Homely house and Georgie at Common Garden flowers are great. The whole thing about reclaiming the word Hag is really interesting but I feel it’s still categorising women in order to put them in a box and is not about valuing women for who or what they are at any age. I wonder if the derogatory definition springs to mind first before any new more positive one for most folk ?
I expect it does - though that is possibly the case with most terms that are reclaimed. My Mum, for example, was appalled when I described myself as fat and thought that I should have used a more socially euphemistic word like ‘curvy’ or ‘ample’ as though they didn’t mean the same to most people.
Thank you for this video and very sorry to hear of your poor hens.
It was very sad - thank you - and felt so wasteful as only one was eaten. X
Another great read is Wife Drought by Annabelle Crabb. A terrific Aussie woman who keeps us on our toes. Has an interesting podcast as well. Love your TH-cam.
Thanks for this Helen. I will check it out. Xx
So thoughtful, thank you.
you are wonderful Jane and I love the gentleness of your way of talking and your thoughtful ideas and thoughts. Thank you for just being the beautiful you.
Ah thank you 😘
I remember taking a women’s history class during my undergraduate studies. Born for Liberty: A History of Women in America by Sara Evans was our text book. Our professor warned that we might become angry while immersed in our studies. I thought that was a strange assumption, until indeed , it happened to me. Thank you, Jane, for your genuine & refreshing thoughts on women and breaking the stereotypical roles society places on us! Love your grounded, common sense approach❣️🕊️🍁🌱🌲🧚🏼♂️
Given that women are in the majority in higher education, and in every field where talent rather than connections are dominant, I find it amazing that we are STILL trying to address the balance. We really do need to do more to support the research and telling of stories whether that’s buying books, listening to podcasts, going to the cinema, or talking, talking talking!
Janina Ramirez, the historian often on TV, has written Femina. This is a detailed history of women written out of conventional history.
That’s so interesting Ann. Thanks for the recommendation x
Good book, I’ve just finished it.
Hi Jane
Thanks for your chat alot to think about 😊
X
Thanks Paula. X
Thank you so much for sharing that Jane, my favourite video so far though still going through earlier ones. Very interesting topic and I love reading the comments from other like minded folks 🥰
I always love the comments that you get here on TH-cam x
What a lovely chat,, proud to be a mother hen , or hen wife. Will have to look up the books you mentioned, and I do follow some of the channels you mentioned. I stopped coloring my hair years ago, I’m 67. One of my sisters told me I looked like an old hag, when she first saw my silver hair! I very nicely told her she should not talk, and maybe she should do something with her own hair. I’m not bragging, but my hair is very long, and it’s the ombre look, all natural,lots of silver, white and still a bit of brown underneath. It did take me a long time to get use to it, and years ago I wanted to color it and hairdressers told me to leave it and be patient! I told her,,, I’m not patient and how about we put my hair on her head! She laughed. I do get many compliments on my silvery white , calico cat hair. I am me, and it took me many years to get here, and be comfortable in my own way of living,,,and I will never again color my hair, last hair cut in a Saloon was over 10 years ago., And I don’t think I would wear leggings for the Pr, company. I only wear leggings around the house in private. Now ,I would model jeans and a flannel shirt, or such, but no leggings sorry. Hope I didn’t go on too long. Thanks for sharing!oh my grandmother was from Blackpool area, came over to the states as an indentured servant in 1919. ❤
I think that natural hair can look amazing - yours sound spectacular x
Jane this chat was eye opening. Never had known of this "genre" of lifestyle: hag. Not sure I can come to grips with use of the word hag as it feels derogatory. Looking up the definition I've found there to be other uses than the old, ugly crone. Maybe a wizened older female could be tolerated better. Enjoyed this video very much. Thanks for the book mentioned.
Thank you. Yes it’s an interesting concept got a PR campaign!
Happy Artistic Gem 💖 xx
Hello Jane. I found this episode so interesting. I thought I would point you in the direction of another middle aged woman here on TH-cam whose content I think you would enjoy. She is called Sarah and her channel is called Fiber Trek. She does lots of different arts and crafts, including lots of botanical and cyanotype printing. I hope you’re well. Laura x
Thanks Laura. I will go and check her out. X
So interesting!! I do follow a few of the channels you mentioned in your video! I think I might like the idea of hen wife... although I'm no longer a wife, which suits me fine. Thank you for your videos and your outlook!
The interesting thing about the word henwife in Scotland - or even the words wifie or hen/hinny - is that they don’t automatically suggest that a woman is married. X
How sad that a movement to empower women in their later years is becoming commercialised. I suspect that I am too a hen wife but have only been able to embrace it now in my early 60s . Thank you for such an insightful commentary.
It is sad.
Mousie Makes is good to watch too, you may even be treated to a poem 😊
Thank you. I’ll check that out. X
She's lovely!
And check out Marions World, she's an awesome woman.
Hi from Western North Carolina. Thoughts become words, words become actions. I would NEVER refer to myself as a hag. As older women we need to use uplifting language and set an example for younger women.
Thanks Anna - yes I tend to agree, there are so many wonderful things about getting older. X
So much to think on Jane. My daughter reported that her very little girl looks in the mirror and says “I always knew I was pretty but not that pretty!!.” I often repeat this to myself when I feel like a frumpy old hag!
😂😂😂
When I started TH-cam now 4 years ago a young woman went on my page and called me an old hag lol. Now I have that word blocked. I had my hair grown out all silver at the time and was only just 51. I took care of my mom who had a horrible dementia called Lewy bodies and then my dad was dying in a nursing home during COVID so yeah, really did not need to read those harsh cruel words. I already felt I was falling apart with grief. But they did this to insult me because on another channel I just thought we all should get along and wrote that on a page when there were riots (Now I know with having a channel to not comment on politically anything.) I spent too much time being upset about it though after seeing this comment and even then colored my hair again. My husband told me that she was just a miserable person to have wrote it because it was far from the truth. I did not have very many subs at the time so nobody supported me against this young women's bully words, I almost ended my channel. I have grown a lot though since then and your views on it are spot on! Oh, and I am growing my hair out silver again, just like my beautiful moms silver white hair.
Oh this is horrible and shocking. I got the advice that when views outnumber subscribers you will get random awful comments and that it’s fine to delete and block. I’m glad you kept going. X
@@snapdragonlife Yeah, scary place on TH-cam when just starting.
Reading Normal Women I had a wtf moment every five minutes, women erased. And as for ‘livingthegoodhaglife’ oh my sainted aunt!
I know! On both counts. X
Fantastic book reviews cannot wait to read both, having recently retired I have been branded a Tradwife …. I am going to now say hen wife but I know my 21 year old son will say peck peck peck.
Instagram decided a while ago that I was a tradwife and kept showing me tradwife content. Now it’s decided I’m a witch and shows me a lot of occult. 😂😂😂
You are a fabulous hen wife despite being without hens. Sorry to hear of the massacre 😢. Very interesting that anyone should want to be a hag. Not me! I will continue to fight out of any boxes or labels that might be aimed at me. 😊 So many women ignored by history. 😮
Thank you. And that is so true and I believe it’s up to us to tell their stories xx
Unless Hag is Happy Amazing Gorgeous it's not us!
Wonderful x
I would strongly suggest no one ever ask me that question 😂
😂😂😂
I'm 34 and feel like I would be categorised as 'hag' by the working definition you set out. It seems there is a moral panic if a women steps away from mainstream societal norms (ie consumerism) to find a more gentle and natural life. I respect those who want to reclaim terms if that feels important to them, but personally I wish we could just leave this behind to find something better.
My mum (62 years old) has long said that in her mind she is still 21. I think she will stay young as long as she feels that way. Honestly, she has more 'youth' in her than I do!
I believe that archetypes in the real sense can be at any age - but yes, like you I find them a little reductive.
I'm not a hag, I'm a crone.
That whole concept is clearly invented by a marketing man looking for ways to exploit women in their least desirable (to men ) phase of life. I am 60 and glad to be completely invisible because all of the crap we have to deal with as younger women disappears. I find this really insulting and just another example of toxic capitalism and patriarchy personified. We are not hags. We are incredible women with a lifetime of wisdom and experience. I’m so angry on your behalf. Thanks for bringing this phenomenon to my attention.
I did a video all about the idea of being invisible and what do people actually mean when they complain about becoming invisible (because who wouldn’t want an invisibility cloak???)
“Living the good hag life…” 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂ROFL
Isn’t it awful!
Look at the "role models" that prance all over the screens. I like TH-cam as I can pick and mix and stay away from the "role models." I'm not a follower of make up or fashion, never have been. If I had been classified as a hag, the company would have had some questions to answer, although I do enjoy the world of dragons, healers etc. Don't let it get to you, bigger companies are there to make money and they d on't care who they trample on to get the money. Enjoy the people around you. =-) Take care =-)
Very true x