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How to stay in relation through disagreement - Thomas Hübl
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 22 พ.ย. 2021
- Check in on your experience, how close or how distant do you feel to a group of people, or to one person you don't agree with? We can have a strong disagreement with somebody and still be in relation. Contrasting viewpoints do not mean that I have to disconnect from the experience of the other. Re-traumatization happens in the disconnect from the experience, not in the disagreement of how we see life.
It is not WHAT we talk about that is painful, it is HOW we talk with each other. The relational experience is a key factor in data transfer, and relation is a data connection. If I talk to somebody from a distance how can I expect that the person will listen to me when I don't even feel her or him? But if I am able to be with somebody that I disagree with in a kind of closeness, then whatever I bring in the room has at least the highest potential of alchemical power.
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More Info about Thomas Hübl: www.thomashuebl...
Thankyou for explaining my feeling, preparing for when confrontation comes, in form of differing viewpoints - 'Stand tall and know who you are, that you can rise above your circumstance' (Maya Angelou) and yet not be aggressive.
This is super important right now Thomas as the algorithms governing what the vast majority of people see and hear on their computers/phones/televisions/tablets are creating possibly the maximum distancing they can. So many people are going down rabbit holes and have no relation to eachother whatsoever. So not only is it polarising people but it's creating that disconnect you talk about.
Thomas Hübl said right at the beginning: "What I'm going to say now doesn't apply to. [...] [sic!] Or most likely it's hard to apply it to criminal or very violent situations."
I think I have observed that the most unsatisfactory way a court case can end is when the criminal invokes the right to remain silent and does not even make eye contact with the victims or grieving people of a murder.
It is the maximum closeness that the delinquent and victim or bereaved can have after severe trauma. The courtroom. And the perpetrator has to answer to the law and speak up, and that would encourage distancing. At least that's how I understood the video. If the perpetrator is silent, it's like traumatizing violence again. Just murdered quietly.
Good point, and Great question 👍🏻🤔🧏🏻♀️
With particular personalities the challenge is to stay with one’s own conviction rather than merge to avoid conflict. This strategy can help those types also.
I appreciate the focus on relational process. Thanks.
That is a fantastic self observation to learn about.
I remember times when difficult confrontational conversations turned bad in the past, and something inside me really had 'clammed up' closed off the other, and I had become distant as I stewed over the conflict. When I came to conversation, I was ready to quit relating before anything was said; nothing beyond me could have saved those relationships.
My life could have been so different several times over if I knew this then.
In future, I will see myself in this posture, and refrain from distancing when facing disagreements.
Thank you Thomas Hubl
Thank you Thomas. Just had this experience ..trying to be...authentic in public
In den ganzen channeling etc hör ich das immer, und jetzt verstehe ich das noch besser und bin sofort berührt.
Such an important point, Thomas! Specially during this festive season when we come together with family and people we love to celebrate but may not agree with the way they think or do (ie. covid, etc!). Thanks for such an important reminder! Much love and gratitude!💕✨
That's the first-time I heard you say that word..I could feel all the emotions under neath it.
I think that fear is a serious factor in the situation of distancing. In the others exclusion so the 2D Poster version is experienced.
Apartheid was for us most times this.
Fear became legislation to exclude all others as we so well know this trauma , of national exclusion.
When we work towards 3D embodiment relational experience is possible with much trust.
Thank you .
very crucial information, in its nucancing, for creating more understanding.
Needed to hear this right now. Thank you.
There isn't a thick black line between criminal behavior and common, everyday bad behavior.
This reaches me - start from how it is, right now, right with me. Am I distanced - right now?
This is interesting. Yet when we notice we are feeling a sense of distance because the tone, energy, words of the other are rough and lack empathy, then how can we still maintain a sense of emotional safety? Of course we can state our boundary or leave the situation if we don’t feel safe, but I’m wondering if there is still a way to be in an emotionally safe state within ourselves if the other is not behaving in an emotionally safe way?
My relation is rage. It is difficult to not act. I often need to lie down
#FascistRegime #Faschismus
Unterdrücker und Unterdrückte haben die nur unterschiedliche Standpunkte oder ist das asymmetrische Versklavung?
Superesser and Suppressed do there have only different viewpoints or do there asymmetric enslavement?
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You can handle the reaction , impulse from your Mind-Body impressions and be free to respond or not.
How does it work out?
Thomas 🌄🤸🤽🌈🤗