Thanks for putting the "overthinking hours" in for this topic. I wonder if envy and jealously correlate with the strength of your personal relationships and friendships. I have been jealous of friends and find myself receding from their lives so I can suppress my jealously. If you don't know them, you can't really be in jealously. Ignorance was my bliss. Then I realize how lonely I have become because of my lack of friends.
I relate to this so badly. I feel the same way about envying certain traits and achievements people have because I want external validation. It feels so relieving to know that I’m not alone. I’m often guilty of asking myself “why” I’m feeling envious or irritable and feeling so much shame.
I think this is a really important topic to touch, and also more common than known. It's not easy to enjoy life when it's not going as expected, but I guess that's the hole point of living, learning to enjoy the path you are in. Thank you for posting this, I appreciate it, and the fact you have put the spotlight on this. Getting subscribed!
I had one of those supernaturally self-assured friends. One time I saw her being that way in a fairly innocuous situation and had and epiphany: “What a pain, that thing of being assertive!” Now seriously, if you’re the kind of person that feels envy sometimes, that feel jealous sometimes, that feels any toxic feeling from time to time, realize it will pass, it’s a bump in the road. If it doesn’t pass, find help. If you’re the kind of person that never feels any toxic feeling, like ever, you’re lying. Seek help too.
@@MyFiveCents No. Quite the opposite. I meant she’s able to be self-assured in both hard and simple moments. This was just a mild problem in a cafeteria. And she was just stating things with confidence. But because it was this innocuous moment, I was able to look at the moment from the outside and realize we’re just different. Being assertive in most moments suits her, being not that in most moments suits me, and I don’t really envy her, to me having to express myself that way consistently would be tiresome as hell. She’s still my friend, I don’t know why I wrote ”had” in my post. My pleasure. You’re honesty is appreciated as well.
This is the second of your videos that I relate to almost on a frightening level. In fact, I was talking with a school friend this morning about how she constantly seems to receive texts while my phone is as dry as a desert. When I see classmates and friends moving up, looking better than I could ever look, being better at my hobbies than I am, having way more friends while I'm almost always on my own... I just feel intense envy and resentment. Like why can't I have that? Why can't I be born better-looking, why can't I get good at things despite all my effort, why are my friends so much closer to each other than they are to me? Why can't I have what they have? Why am I me, rather than them? I really relate to your point about envying people less for their traits and more for the external validation that's always being showered upon them. To me, it always seemed like everyone around me is accepted, cared by everyone, surrounded by love and affection -- hell, one of the metrics I use as comparison is having more social media followers, for fuck's sake -- while I'm desperately grasping for miniscule breadcrumbs being fed to me. And it makes me kinda just want to self-isolate and chill alone because being around them just feels... bad. Like I'm constantly having what I lack being shoved in my face. It makes me hate myself because I KNOW it's toxic to have the resentment boil inside me and it makes me a bad person and a bad friend. And I know that I should just "focus on myself" and work on my own goals, but it gets lonely as heck that way -- and you know what, maybe I do want someone to give some kind of acknowledgement when I achieve things, sue me. I don't know how to grow out of this mindset when it's blindingly obvious that everyone else gets praised to the ends of the earth just for existing and I get a lukewarm "good job" at best. It hurts that I'm always considered lesser than everyone else. It hurts and I'm tired. Anyway, thanks for making this video. I hope one day we can figure it out. I'd love to keep seeing more videos like this from you!
I'VE BEEN THINKING ABOUT THIS FOR THE PAST FEW WEEKS OMG. im SO glad im not alone because I just recently caught myself almost ghosting a friend of mine because I became extremely envious of her. she's succeeding and living her life happily, while I feel,,, stagnant? when I see how she's growing and being so happy, I catch myself becoming distant from her because she's where I wish I was.
I feel you :’) It sucks because you know it’s not their fault at all. I think as long as we don’t act on the feeling (like in a sabotaging way,) it’s perfectly okay to gradually and hopefully temporarily distance ourselves if that’s what we need! And with that distance, it’s easier to focus on practical ways to get unstuck.
Great topic and ideas, thanks for oversharing. This is the kind of content I usually look for but it's hard to find. Clicked for the bestdressed thumbnail, but will stay around to see more of what you have to say
![일상 속 기분 좋음 [Proto disco meme]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/DwmEIaZ7XGQ/mqdefault.jpg)
I'm envious of people all the time, to the point I isolate myself to not have to feel so inferior in contrast to them
Thanks for putting the "overthinking hours" in for this topic. I wonder if envy and jealously correlate with the strength of your personal relationships and friendships. I have been jealous of friends and find myself receding from their lives so I can suppress my jealously. If you don't know them, you can't really be in jealously. Ignorance was my bliss. Then I realize how lonely I have become because of my lack of friends.
I relate to this so badly. I feel the same way about envying certain traits and achievements people have because I want external validation. It feels so relieving to know that I’m not alone. I’m often guilty of asking myself “why” I’m feeling envious or irritable and feeling so much shame.
I had no idea how much i needed to be validated in these feelings. Thanks for this vid man 💙💙
I think this is a really important topic to touch, and also more common than known. It's not easy to enjoy life when it's not going as expected, but I guess that's the hole point of living, learning to enjoy the path you are in. Thank you for posting this, I appreciate it, and the fact you have put the spotlight on this. Getting subscribed!
I had one of those supernaturally self-assured friends. One time I saw her being that way in a fairly innocuous situation and had and epiphany: “What a pain, that thing of being assertive!” Now seriously, if you’re the kind of person that feels envy sometimes, that feel jealous sometimes, that feels any toxic feeling from time to time, realize it will pass, it’s a bump in the road. If it doesn’t pass, find help. If you’re the kind of person that never feels any toxic feeling, like ever, you’re lying. Seek help too.
You mean she was being *too* self-assured in a situation where that wasn’t called for?
Thanks for watching! Your comments are always really helpful :)
@@MyFiveCents No. Quite the opposite. I meant she’s able to be self-assured in both hard and simple moments. This was just a mild problem in a cafeteria. And she was just stating things with confidence. But because it was this innocuous moment, I was able to look at the moment from the outside and realize we’re just different. Being assertive in most moments suits her, being not that in most moments suits me, and I don’t really envy her, to me having to express myself that way consistently would be tiresome as hell. She’s still my friend, I don’t know why I wrote ”had” in my post.
My pleasure. You’re honesty is appreciated as well.
This is the second of your videos that I relate to almost on a frightening level. In fact, I was talking with a school friend this morning about how she constantly seems to receive texts while my phone is as dry as a desert. When I see classmates and friends moving up, looking better than I could ever look, being better at my hobbies than I am, having way more friends while I'm almost always on my own... I just feel intense envy and resentment. Like why can't I have that? Why can't I be born better-looking, why can't I get good at things despite all my effort, why are my friends so much closer to each other than they are to me? Why can't I have what they have? Why am I me, rather than them?
I really relate to your point about envying people less for their traits and more for the external validation that's always being showered upon them. To me, it always seemed like everyone around me is accepted, cared by everyone, surrounded by love and affection -- hell, one of the metrics I use as comparison is having more social media followers, for fuck's sake -- while I'm desperately grasping for miniscule breadcrumbs being fed to me. And it makes me kinda just want to self-isolate and chill alone because being around them just feels... bad. Like I'm constantly having what I lack being shoved in my face.
It makes me hate myself because I KNOW it's toxic to have the resentment boil inside me and it makes me a bad person and a bad friend. And I know that I should just "focus on myself" and work on my own goals, but it gets lonely as heck that way -- and you know what, maybe I do want someone to give some kind of acknowledgement when I achieve things, sue me. I don't know how to grow out of this mindset when it's blindingly obvious that everyone else gets praised to the ends of the earth just for existing and I get a lukewarm "good job" at best. It hurts that I'm always considered lesser than everyone else. It hurts and I'm tired.
Anyway, thanks for making this video. I hope one day we can figure it out. I'd love to keep seeing more videos like this from you!
I'VE BEEN THINKING ABOUT THIS FOR THE PAST FEW WEEKS OMG. im SO glad im not alone because I just recently caught myself almost ghosting a friend of mine because I became extremely envious of her. she's succeeding and living her life happily, while I feel,,, stagnant? when I see how she's growing and being so happy, I catch myself becoming distant from her because she's where I wish I was.
I feel you :’) It sucks because you know it’s not their fault at all. I think as long as we don’t act on the feeling (like in a sabotaging way,) it’s perfectly okay to gradually and hopefully temporarily distance ourselves if that’s what we need! And with that distance, it’s easier to focus on practical ways to get unstuck.
Great topic and ideas, thanks for oversharing. This is the kind of content I usually look for but it's hard to find. Clicked for the bestdressed thumbnail, but will stay around to see more of what you have to say
how do you not have more subs???
I like this type of videos and the honesty!
hey thanks for being so vulnerable. this is wildly relatable. a deep dive into envy and comparison. applause from the other side of the internet
Oh... I see the algorithm wants to hurt me... fantastic video.