If Half-Life 2 was Written by a Bot
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 2 ต.ค. 2024
- Gordon Freeman continues his murderous ramp- I mean, journey.
Support us on Patreon! / deadwatergaming
Buy our merch! teespring.com/...
Watch the Previous 'Written by a Bot' here: • If Half-Life was Writt...
Original Fan-Fiction by Fat Corgi Guy and Botnik Predictive Writer: goo.gl/4hkc9E
Timbleweebs' TH-cam Channel: / @timbleweebs
Mahogany's TH-cam Channel: / themahoganycrafter
Narration by MahoganyCrafter: goo.gl/kxxVja
This is an emulation of "Full-Life: Consequences" by ICTON;
all credit for the style, narration, idea, etc. goes to him.
Check out the original Full Life Consequences: goo.gl/hl89hJ
Contact us:
Twitter: / deadwatermedia
Music:
Spongebob OST
Herb Alpert & The Tijuana Brass - Spanish Flea
Littlebigplanet OST
God Bless!
Deadwater logo and channel banner by Papa Shlup
/ adamclarkart1
You've done it again! Damn that was good, I loved the Oblivion joke and the inter-dimensional sewers especially.
FatCorgiFilms moarrrrr
FatCorgiFilms you should make a portal and portal two version of this! or like the script. (i dont actually know how you do this maybe ill visit your channel.
*REAPEAT MISJUDGED WORSE DESTRUCTION*
You should do episode 1 & 2, and half life 1's expansions too. :D
XD
"Gordon thinks about his father"
"Gordon's father : you're not rock n roll icon from liverpool, you are dog"
*_-Best father's quote-_*
Is that an actual quote
Father's best quote.
The Hat Headcrab duh
@@georgeryan8267 y e s
It's from "The Magic of Belle Isle" with Morgan Freeman as a cast
'The aliens still did not entirely appreciate Freeman' might be my favourite way of saying 'they were trying to kill him'. It's such a wonderfully polite and understated way of putting it.
repeat misjudged worst destruction.
he also visually reverses it, so the aliens who are trying to kill him are the ones who actually like him
@@llanfairpwlgwyngyll7331 Because they were masochist.
“The Combine soldiers all die because Gordon finds them very opportune for clearing minefields.”
I think that somebody needs to use this phrase. It is simply amazing.
MisterMustachio GMC
This line's way too true to not be used. I've used Combine Soldier corpses to clear many a minefield in my day.
I was going to comment the same thing. This robot is genious.
Good phrase, I hope to find it in a farming almanac
We need it in some hl2 mod
The best part is how it simply has no logic behind it. They just die because Gordon finds them useful. I love that.
This is like when you were 3 and played with action figures and just made up a story as you went along.
wait kids used to do that?
@@demo-server4091 You.....Didn't?
@@benaming2358 no?
@@demo-server4091 Wait, you don't anymore?
I thought everyone did this, even in adulthood
Noone likes Gordon.
Except Alyx.
"Kleiner's extremely excellent teleporter that was bad." had me in tears.
2:06
Jorry rewatch that part
same.
*Accurate name for Kleiners Patent on teleportation technology*
Magnusson's Magnificent Microwave Casserole.
"the aliens did not entirely like freeman but some did because they were masochists"
Yes
Yup
Mhm
repeat misjudged worst destruction.
father grigori died with zombies because gordon continues past the burning
He found a train and overzealously rides the unsophisticated gondola to Dr Kliener
Kleiner's Extremely Excellent Teleporter That Was Bad™
trademark
KEETTWB
AKA Ender pearl.
Also known as keettwb
i will buy it for 1000 dollars instead vr with hl:alyx
“I think you deliberately misunderstand me” sounds like something the Gman would actually say.
It's actually one of Mossman's lines, but yeah it does
@Toaster I like that your profile picture is the Evil Toaster (I forgot the exact name) in the Sink. Do you have the power supply to blow up the Mojave (again)?
No it would actually be
“I *inhales* think you *makes weird noise* delibbbberartleyyyy *inhales again* misunderstand me
More like GLaDOS
@@rileyreed7690 yeah GLaDOS is like wait did you just throw that Aperture science thing we don’t know what it does into an Aperture science intelligence safety incinerator
"which collapses scientists"
I mean, he's not _wrong..._
repeat misjudged worst destruction.
It either knocks them out or it kills them soooo... yeah I guess
@@Quixoria have you seen the sharp end of it? That's the part that collapses scientists.
"Gordon is sad because demons arent aliens"
Gordon: Demon slaying isnt *MY* job.
just call the doom guy
It’s not MY job, it’s his job.
*Rip and Tear faintly in the background*
@@kindofhuman8147 Gordon looks behind him and sees a figure looking intensely at the imp.
I am shaking my headcrab at this comment
who're you gonna call
"Gordon likes destruction."
"Gordon decides there is more killing to do."
"Gordon is a murderer."
I love that bot's version of Freeman is perfect in line with Ross Scott's.
That was not murder. That was totally self-defense. Just because he had a submachine gun doesn't change anything. It just lets him defend more efficiently.
"Gordon mimes to Alx he kills people with grenades"
Repeat misjudged worse destruction
@Maximal's Personal Profile Guards? Do you mean HECU soldiers sent to kill him and his co-workers?
@Maximal's Personal Profile Oh yeah I forgot there were actual guards you kill.
"Gordon does X because Y"
makes up at least half of the story and I love it.
Demons are not aliens and Gordon was sad.
Barney was also beyond words branching towards entanglement.
@@wta1518 the aliens still did not entirely appreciate Freeman, but some did because they were masochists.
@@3ofSpades Manhacks fly at Gordon but OK
@@wta1518 there was also resistance member “hiding” in a piece of concrete pipe named Alyx Vance.
My favorite part is how Gordon's weapon of choice appears to be headcrabs.
You forget about his Crowbar Angel Manipulater which collapses scientists.
what about the gravity gun that bends benefactors into oblivion?
@@NYCFIGHTBACKROOMS His Crowbar Angel Manipulator *Aside whispers* which collapses scientists.
SMH (shake my headcrab)
The deadpan delivery makes this so much better
"Manhacks fly at Gordon but okay."
pretty much
Yeah I get that now stop copying the lines
@@doom-guy6716 no
Basically how everyone feels when manhacks attack them
@@doom-guy6716 ik this comment is a year old but.. idk if you realize comments like that get quite popular on videos at times.
Sums up recent years of my life.
*breen collapses and explodes*
That's how I want to die
Wouldn’t that hurt
@@WaikingDeadStudios spontaneous explosion is instant death
Me too.
here have a suicide bomb
Martyrdom: Drop a live grenade upon death.
2017: elon musk says artificial intelligence will rule humanity
2018: _MANHACKS ARE MEAN_
Toaster I love it
2019:Toasters are humanity's overlords
manhacks fly at Gordon *but okay*
well elon isnt wrong. i mean the average person is a lot dumber than the bot making this.
2024: chatbots that can actually make up a coherent story
"yes my favourite part of Half Life 2 was also when the resistance made Freeman commit war crimes behind the citadel."
Oh yes I remember when I was a kid first played half life when I broke the Geneva convention.
Ah Id hop into a game of half life and not leave it until I've committed I try to go for 2.3 but 5 is usually average
@@JodiGarrity it’s Half Life. The Black Mesa incident broke Geneva.
tbf the combine has committed more than gordon ever will so it is completely normal for gordon to do the same
"Gordon shook his headcrab."
That's not nice to treat Lamar like that, Gordon.
Timothy McKane I think Lamar is going to kill him
Timothy McKane
*H E A D C R A B* *S H A K I N G*
*I N T E N S I F I E S*
You’re not an animal person.
I would have shook that headcrab harder than that, if you know wat I mean ;)
What the f... man? ;-;
*Narrator:* *"G-MAN STEPS OUT OF A BUILDING."*
*G-Man:* **Walks out of a port-a-pottie**
Port-a-potties are technically buildings though.
he doesnt even walk the door just goes bye bye
@@thecpg980 It just falls
T H E R E C A N B E O N L Y O N E
@@chaoticchild519 “I think you *d e l i b e r a t e l y* misunderstand me”
"Demons are not aliens and Gordon is sad."
TOP 10 Saddest Anime Moments.
**twerks**
Lets keep this comment at 333 Plz.
How about 666
555?
@@akasrkin9366 Just made it to 666
"Gordon thought alyx was futile, but did not kill anyone because he was thinking about his father."
Morgan freeman:
*You are not some rock n roll icon from liverpool, you're a dog*
*YOU'RE* *
@@jacobredfield1386 Oh thanks i forgot your and you're are different back in, i was stoopid in the old days
Best father quote ever
we're is that quote from? I legit can't find it anywhere
@@corporalregicide5248 y e s
Now I know why it's called DOG.
D: Education
O: Manipulator
G: Buddy
Makes total sense!
my god, you are right! how did we not see it before!? it was there all along!
eDucation manipulatOr buddyG. Yep, makes perfect sense now!
Makes perfect sense. Buddy spelled with a G is right up among the likes of Henry spelled with a C.
I don't know why but I found this obscenely funny 😂😂 Thank you
Diploma
Official
Giver
Seeing Morgan Freeman as Gordon Freeman's Dad....10/10 best video ever.
Kleiner's
Extremely
Excellent
Teleporter
That
Was
Bad
The K.E.E.T.T.W.B
Better name than 'R.U.S.S.E.L.S.'
dope name
Good one bread
@@idiotsimulator8055 Really Unusual Silver Sticks Eloquently Lifts Stuff
*Kliener
This video feels like a gmod machinima made in 2008
rip kitty0706
I know right? we need more videos written by a bots, these are hillarious.
time for full life consequences
but in 1080p not 240p
I miss those days, we really don't get as much great machinima these days ):
"Ah, Dr.Freeman. You've got something big like qualified degrees and blood."- Breen
The exact same moment I read this it happened in the vid.
Emotional crit
"He knocks on the door and is greeted by the fascinating demons which dwell in the basement. Demons are not aliens and Gordon is sad."
I honestly have no idea what part of the Half-Life story that's supposed to be
ithink its suppose to be when you go to nova prospekt and pretty much wasted your time
The potato things, maybe?
Half-Life 3
100th like
It got mixed up with Doom
Gordon is waiting for Breen's speech to end.
Breen is talking about *that cat.*
Gordon is bored and smacks Breen with headcrabs.
Breen collapses and explodes.
What Cat?
I still have nightmares about that cat...
@@Shaun_Jones as the explosion rocks the combine buildings, Freeman hears a familiar voice...
@@my_restless_dream “Well done, Patient 17. You have no idea what you are doing what I could never do alone.”
"That bends benefactors into *Oblivion* "
[Drops NPC into Oblivion]
"benefactors" ahahahah
Combine soldier: Where the hell am I?
Where's that crossover?
I like how the “bot” kept throwing the story to the end back to the beginning and back to the end
"the mannhacks fly at gordon
but okay"
bruh i was dead
"The aliens did not entirely appreciate Freeman, but some did because they were masochists."
It all makes sense now.
Hmmm, yes, I wonder what the rooftops are hiding today?
The daily combine gunship
Or the daily combine assault
*Gordon nervously running after murdering mossman
0:33 That transition was beautiful.
Fun fact, it is actually probably a real on-the-fly transition. Source is impressive.
Make a dupe with freeman connected to a camera a boom
If Epistle 3 was written by a bot?
BlueShit199 Thats not done yet , please wait 5 more years for some random guy to make that (the guy who made the bot thing is doing Episodes now)
We already have it, it's called Hunt Down the Freeman.
That too, my friend.
YOU FUCKED UP MY FACE
"..."
''resistance member hiding in a piece of concrete pipe called alyx"
that had me in tears lmao
“Gordon thought Alyx was futile.”
@@124Nightwing "But did not kill anyone because he was thinking about his father."
@@zuzka9061 "You are not some rock 'n' roll icon from Liverpool, you're a dog."
But is the resistance member or the concrete pipe called Alyx?
@@calcutt4 it's obviously the pipe
"Gordon is a murderer and doesn't like everyone" an accurate summary.
I would very willingly play a half life 2 mod of this because this storyline is touching the feeling making me happy.
still a better gman impression than hunt for the freeman.
Awesomegra black messsa
Besides mispronouncing black mesa, I didn't think he was that bad. Most of the other voice actors however... ugh.
Mitchell voice actor was pretty good in my opinion. The rest of the game is like MGSV forcefuly raped Half-Life 2 while youtubers make comments about it.
Aleister V Mitchell's voice actor did a pretty good performance when he was talking more casually. When he was trying to do the stoic badass thing, it didn't turn out so well.
Agreed, like everything else in the game, it tried too hard.
So the reason why Half-Life 3 isn’t out is because the bot is still thinking of the plot?
that or, people are still struggling to interpret what it yielded
no its cuz valve dont care.
Half-Life 2: Episode 3.5 - Gordan Freeman And A Picture of What Looked to Be to a Very Small Pile of Murders.
large*
City 17 snarled with a wave of magically energized wind. The sky outside was a great black ceiling, which was full of Manhacks. The only sounds drifting from Doctor Kleiner's lab were the disdainful shrieks of Lamarr. Murder: it was something Gordon Freeman thought was very good.
Gordon freeman had to be a good day at work and the other hand in hand to be a good day at work for a while to get the most important thing of the best way to be a good day.
Dani Lazors wtf dud
I UNDERSTOOD THAT REFERENCE
If Half-Life Alyx was written by a bot.
You have to do dis! No choice!
Yes xd
wahoo!
isnt it already?
"If Hunt Down The Freeman was Written by a Bot" when?
Redundant.
It is already written by a bot.
The game would have improved tenfold
A video like that was already made
i would say a funny moment but every moment is a funny moment.
"He found a train and overzealously rides the unsophisticated gondola to Doctor Kliener."
Brilliant. Perfect. Magnificent. Print it.
“Ouch brain trauma”
“Guess I’ll drive a car and murder zombies and Gregory dies because Gordon likes *trains.* also black Mesa and whatnot”
“Alex is Futile, but he shall not kill because of his father”
“Oh yeah and combine did stuff”
“Kleiner likes Moss”
“Crowbar angel manipulator which cripples scientists”
“Gordon likes *explosions* “
*d o g*
“Gordon is sad because demons”
“Manhacks are become okay”
“Gravity gun go brrt”
“Gordon is bored so he smacks Breen and everybody dies.”
We have GOT to make "rides the unsophisticated gondola" into a euphemism for something.
Jennie was hooked on drugs, so she was riding the unsophisticated gondola.
@@remyrichardson8614 John killed two people for no reason, so he was riding the unsophisticated gondola.
Meaning: doing something most of a society considers evil or otherwise bad.
They were a flat earther so basically they were riding the unsophisticated gondola.
2:02 I thought he was going to give him a hug
How did he do that animation?
Pulls gordon closer Y E E T
He is charging her hands
Better than Hunt Down The Freeman/10
Pyrocynical
That is not saying much
Soo anything above 0?
Half Down the Freeman
"Gordon decides there is more killing to do"
A basic summary of the Half-Life series
Worth the wait
After 9 years in development, hopefully it was worth the wait
Weight*
That’s tf2 not half life
2:24 Crowbar angel manipulator
its actually a good weapon name
(which collapses scientists)
Goodness! Goodbye Dad!
Lulz
"Gordon is waiting for Breen's speech to end" sums up so much of HL2.
I refuse to accept that a bot wrote this, it's just too good.
5:18 "I'm disappointed in you right now."
Crowbar angel manipulator (which collapses scientists) is the pinnacle of the english language. It's good to have the closure that all these years of a language being developed can finally come to an end because it has peaked. This is what we were looking for the whole time, looking to express.
It sounds like a name of an anime weapon.
1:28
Missed Opportunity To Put A JPG Of The HL2 Chapter (Entanglement)
Getting the nostalgia from the Full Life Consequences feeling.
The “Time for questioning” reminds me of “Time for testing” from If Portal 2 Was Written By A Bot
I cant even begin to understand how this script is written.
Poorly.
João Serra what's so special about a predictive keyboard? Literally every iPhone has one
I have a water and juice in my room and right now it is my favourite thing to do with my life. The united state has also said the only thing is to remove a cancerous of water and water from a woman. You have a good time when I say I don't want it either way more then I get you kicked out of the office.
This game has the same gameplay that has the game you need it in and it has to the back you have a chance and it’s free it gets a very fun and fun way for you tools for a good time with the new ones to get the free ones you have free free coins for a coin or something to unlock.
"The new one of those people who have a very large selection process your payment information for all you want it. But when you are looking to make a great time to get it to be in touch with your new account for that. The best in show that we should take care products in some way."
This Gordon Freeman: "Gordon is a murderer and doesn't like everyone."
Freeman's Mind: "Gordon is a murderer and doesn't like anyone."
Get your facts straight, guys...
Gordon likes destruction so he enters a large waste chamber *where Breen lives.*
Thank you bot, for that.
Actually, Breen lives there, not Freeman.
I see you....
CheatsEnabled I'll fix that, thanks for pointing it out!
Nice, thanks for making me feel useful
weren't you born in a toilet OP?
"Praise the train"
-An Overzealous Gordon Freeman
Edit: 1:01 He's so happy :D
This is from four years ago already? Amazing
The combine die because Gordon finds them very opportune for clearing the minefield...
Gold
3:15 I love the idea that the citidel just has a huge door made from wood
Aliens still did not appriciate Freeman, but some did because they were masochists.
"Where the dimensions intersect: through the underground sewers."
Full Life Consequences 4K
This is what I imagine Mitchell Shepard's nightmares are like.
“Gordon is waiting for Breen’s speech to end” is me during dark energy
Haha ha excellent!
seibmoz jfc how are you here
seibmoz my last name is Freeman uhhhh... Do I now need to be a crazy crowbar gravity gun wielding person now?
2:28
woah dude
careful with those Half-Life 3 spoilers
If DOOM was written by a bot
The game is set on an magical UAC facility being invaded by the forces of dominoes.
The game starts as an unreal trooper boomstick man who is chained to an luigi and aware forever in a UAC fairytale basement on Italy. He is released from his girlfriend and gains his desktop, the man, the monitor dominoes slayer who killed pizza to its knees and couldn't be killed, requiring an elaborate plan to capture, and seal him. Making his way across the Italian surface, he enters a meatball factory building that houses a salamander. After re-aligning the salamander, he hopes to learn the source of the dominoes invasion and revenge strain himself to stop it.
Dr. Papa John is the antagonist of the game, apparently responsible for enabling dominoes invasion, swayed by the promises of NFL gameday outfit. The dominoes slayer mows down pizzas like Versailles and his grass. The dominoes slayer is met by Colonel Sanders, who says he will give him the chicken to stop Dr. Papa John and dominoes from destroying Italy.
Why can't this be the actual plot for Doom?
Someone could make that into a Doom map
Xenopath yus
I hate it when I’m a boomstick man and get chained to a Luigi.
FOLLOW UP and remake.
Doomdude: If DOOM was written by a bot. The year is 2145, the humans have perfected a way of teleporting stuff so that causes issues with demons because they don't like humans or technology. Dr. Crazyeye, aka the big mean bill science guy, makes deal with demons and says: "If you help me, I'll buy you all ice cream" and the demons were happily European about it. When Scientists do the portal test, the demons throw a party. Except humans weren't invited. Every human dies and then the military show up angry at demons for huge mess. The military all dies, except for one. Doomdude was arguing his way through hordes of somber space demons from Uranus on the UAC base. Doomdude mowed demons down like grass that cuts itself. However, Doomdude got hungry and ordered dominoes pizza.
The pizza seemed normal, although it had an odd taste to it that Doomdude found quite otherworldly. Just then the pizza grew arms and pulled out a rocket launcher at shot at Doomdudes face. Doomdude then ate the Pizza demon's face off and said: "I love the taste of a demon face in the morning". Dr. Crazyeye appears on the tv and taunted Doomdude with Seinfeld jokes and said: "I ate your rabbit like a fat chick eats cake". Doomdude was angry, so angry he could rip and tear a plastic bag of chips apart. He was also angry because dr. Crazy eyes didn't get him a Christmas gift. Doomdude began to pick up demons and use them similar bats to beat the other demons to death.
The demons tried to file a lawsuit against Doomdude, but couldn't because the justice system Is prejudice towards demons. After Doomdude killed all of the demons, Dr. Crazyeye was the only threat standing. The final fight was a close one for both sides, however, Dr. Crazyeye was in his final demon form and ready to kill Doomdude with easy mode on. Doomdude forgets half of his weapons and the other half was empty. Although, he pulls out a photo of a naked Hilary Clinton and Dr. Crazyeye face melts and he explodes into demonic marshmallows. Doomdude happily joy walks off into the sunset.
“Qualified Degrees and Blood” would be a good movie tagline about Gordon.
"Ah Dr.Freeman you got something bigger like qualifying degrees and blood".... *E M O T I O N A L C R I T*
0:39 repeat misjudged worst destruction
The portal city... Black Mesa. Accurate
I would just like to say that my entire knowledge of half life comes from this and a Google translate edition. Thank you for your contribution of this video to the internet.
I want Crowbar Friend too :(
"Gordon mimics for Alyxa to kill the combine soldiers with hand grenade"
Gordon: aggressively punches combine doll with a probably live grenade
Still better than Hunt Down the Freeman
Why was the story told out of order and some of the events didn’t even happen
When you realize that Freeman's Mind exists, this makes way too much sense.
0:26 "Gordon shook his headcrab." Yes. Give me one now so I can do the same.
I already have one
4:20
*w h a t cat?*
Thatcat
1:54 When you don't do homework. Do your homework kids, safety first. OR ELSE GORDON WILL COME AND SHOOT U !
Emotional crit
3:46 😂😂😂😂😂
"You are not some rock 'n' roll icon from Liverpool,you're a dog"
gordon's father - 2018
"Manhacks fly at Gordon but okay"
Solid gold.
its time for me to live up to my family name and face full life consequences
-John Freeman
3:55 Combine soldier: Wha happen?!
I want a full game where all of this actually happens
So I guess Gordon got out of there and ended up in Ravaholm, initiating the plot that has tobe done in Full. Life. Consequences.
And the pants were dead.
And now we also know why the next boss stepped on Gordon Freeman, killing him: he simply wanted to avenge his lil' bro, G-Man. Unlike him, he wasted no time talking, and so didn't get several direct hits on his body. That is, until John Freeman showed up, looked his weakness on the internet and shot a rocket at him.
2:33 I CAN'T STOP LAUGHING OMG
"Gordon won because he is a murderer and he likes no one."
That sounds like the Gordon I know, or at east the Half Life 1 Version.
I can't believe he actually got Morgan Freeman to voice act Gordon Freeman's dad.
“And mimes to Alex he kills people with grenades” For many months I had no clue what this meant and at first, thought I had a stroke.