Episode 62: How To Hold Space
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 29 ต.ค. 2022
- In this episode, we talk about how to truly hold space (or be with another person's emotions) in a healthy way. We tend to try to “fix” or give unsolicited advice when we’re uncomfortable, which doesn’t help to create an emotional connection. You’ll learn how to make others feel heard and how to hold space for your own emotions.
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Love this episode so much. As a recovering people pleaser, I very much struggle with not wanting to jump in and fix other people's problems. I had a therapist once tell me that "it's not your hero's journey" . That jumping in to try to resolve a loved one's issue is taking away that person's unique opportunity to enact their own hero's journey and learning the lessons that come from that journey. 🤯
Yes! So well said and what a powerful awareness-the mind blown emoji is very fitting! Thank you for watching and taking the time to share that here! Sending you much love Jeanna.
"When you are aware of it, you can begin to guide it." LOVE this approach.
So glad!! Awareness if the key. Thanks for being in these conversations with us, Carolina!
Incredible clarity on something that a lot of us try to do but find extremely difficult to. Holding space is incredibly healing. ❤
First timer here… and wow! Such a great podcast. Just this AM my love was down the rabbit hole (usually on Mondays) I sat and just listened AND witness my push back and want to solve vs just listen and not take on the negative energy . Thx you so much. New aha to holding space and compassion for what another’s energy is going thru.. comes up.. again compassion and holding Love ❤
Subscribed. Together you have given a practical wide-ranging and detailed description of holding space for both therapists and non-therapists. I just discovered your channel and this episode in particular and I hope more people do so too
I am always trying to let people know that I can relate to them by sharing a similar story, and there were many times that it didn't feel right for some reason but I couldn't figure out why. I always thought wow, why wouldn't that person want to know that I understand, first-hand, what they're going through and put the onus on them. And after watching this, now I know. Thank you so much for the perspective.
Certainly understand that feeling you're describing, Rixanne! So glad you saw this episode and are making those connections. Appreciate you sharing with us here. We know many can relate to you! Sending you much love.
This was such good information. “Holding space” at first sounds like holding your own space, rather than holding that space open for some else! It is difficult for me not to do the “yes that happened to me too” reaction. I appreciate how your information is so practical. I need much more practice with this.
This is a late comment on the video as I just bought your workbook and have started coming back to your podcast. This episode struck me to my core! I want to be able to apply this concept to my job, which can be a very highly emotional customer service position. Would you be able to do an episode on how to apply some of these topics to job positions? I can find it challenging to communicate solely over the phone without being able to show body language and without asking too deep of questions and feel like I’m crossing a professional boundary. I find myself saying “I’m sorry” a lot when in fact what I want to convey is that I’m holding space for the customer. Thank you!
This episode is pure GOLD
The breathing sound is back 🙌🏽 I always breathe with it 🫶🏽 This episode truly gave me so much validation. Thank you for holding space🤓🙏🏽
Aww, love this (and giggling at your last sentence)!! Has the breathing sound been missing for you on other episodes? We'll have a look! Grateful this episode was so validating for you, Leila. Thanks for tuning in here and gracing us with your presence always
@@SelfHealersSoundboard Yeah, I couldn’t hear it in the last two episodes. I was quite sad but then excited again that I heard it. I probably had a technical gremlin🤓 Thank you for these episodes. They are my role model vs. before when films were. 🙏🏽🫶🏽
Wonderful! And it's also helpful to start with - setting the intention to hold space - beforehand whenever possible. I always make sure to do that for my clients before sessions. Thank you for creating this video. It's so important for effective communication and the healing process.
You are most welcome, Matthew! Powerful practice for your sessions--thank you for sharing how you use this! And thank you for watching. Much love to you. ❤
Awesome, clear info as always thank you 🙏🏼 ❤
Thank you for this. I can absolutely relate to the twitter comment you mentioned. Oftentimes, all I need is to be heard and to feel empathy. But instead I find myself getting all sorts of unsolicited advise without even being asked or having these people really curious about me and what's going on. Eventually I feel it's better to just not say anything because sometimes the people that I trust to listen and be curious just has a lot to say without really hearing me out.
Thank you for watching this episode and sharing your experience here, Pia. It's very relatable. Grateful for your presence in this convo.Sending you much love.
So very helpful ❤
Thank you for this episode and the work that you do.
You are so welcome, Sami. Thank you too! Glad you saw it :) Sending much love
I was recommended this channel (podcast) a couple of weeks ago to listen to on my morning walks and have completely immersed myself in your advice, insight and tools moving forward. Thankyou to all involved in your projects and for sharing vulnerability, a warmth of perspective and just for keeping me company in my day to day life :)
You are a gift, Kat Rose! Thank you so much for immersing in the conversations and being curious. It's an honor for us to keep you company in your day to day life and to have your presence here as well. Sending much love from everyone over here making this all possible :)
Dr.Bradly cooper developed the Enotion codes which clears emotional blocks from the energy body and helps you to process and release those blocks which will help you not bring your personal experience into the experience
Good advice, never looked at this Holding Space message. My adult children need to here this , especially because my adult daughter the oldest one , is suffering from the same emotional experience I have. Can’t wait to share this message of real change for ourselves.
Ziya, got full body chills reading your message of sharing with your daughter. No matter what age, the best gift a parent can give to their children is their own healing. This is so powerful and we're so grateful for your sharing here. Sending much love to you and all of your children. Thank you for watching
This is gold!
I like this episode. Everything you listed from body language, absorbing the listing, unsolicite advice, it is so good to add- for ys to be aware kind of how the person it's approaching us, and what we want/ need in the whole picture.
Thank you again for a great discussion.🥰
Thank you so much for this addition, Jennifer! Love having your presence here and a part of these conversations :). Much love to you.
This has been so helpful. It’s the first episode I’ve watched but now I want to dive into them all, and I know I’ll watch this one again. I really want to work at holding space for others therapeutically in my work and personally in my relationships with friends and family. Thank you for sharing.xx
So glad this is helpful, Laura. And welcome to the Soundboard! Thank you for coming by to watch :) It's wonderful (and inspiring) that you're intentionally wanting to work at holding space for others both professionally and personally. A gift to yourself and to humankind. And you've already set the wheels in motion by watching. Grateful you chose to do so! Sending you much love and hope you enjoy our other episodes!
Can you do an episode on depression, anxiety or ADHD - how to deal with them?
Thank you for your request, Aashi! Appreciate you watching and commenting here :)
This is a episode I’ll be listening to again and again. Thank you 🙏❤️
So glad this is helpful, Samantha!! We're honored to hear that :) Thanks for watching and commenting here. Lots of love to you!
I Soo Appreciated This❤
Thank you guys for this!!! This so helps!!!! Appreciate you!
You are so welcome! We're glad this helps :) Thanks for watching and commenting, M B!
Hello I never comment as Iv recently switched from Spotify but u guys are so insightful🥹 I come here a lot when I am highly anxious or panicky and you help me stay grounded . Makes me feel safe to feel my feelings . I was wondering if you could do an episode on dealing with big feelings in the moment ? Like a panic attack guide or something along those lines ? Thank you for being Such a big part of my healing journey ❤
Hi Sarah! Thanks for popping over to TH-cam, we're happy to have you here in the comments and convo with us! We'll certainly incorporate this into an upcoming episode-thank you for making that request. And thank you for allowing us to be a part of your healing journey. We're all in this together. Much love to you Sarah!
I am struggling with space being held for me in the community
How can I hold space for someone who is giving me the silent treatment? It's been 8 weeks now.
Thank you for your soundboard and podcast, it's so insightful and helping me navigate a very difficult sibling relationship.
So glad this is helping you navigate that relationship, Lucy. Without knowing context, it sounds you may be holding space by allowing them to play out their feelings (albeit this way in the form of the silent treatment). We can't force another be or act in a certain way, though we can take in the experience as information, feedback and awareness for ourselves of how we will choose to respond and move forward. Hope this is helpful. We're sending you much love and appreciate your connection here.
I want people to hold space for me so I really try to do it for others I am not always good at holding space for people. I thought there was something wrong with me because I was on support groups I felt really dismissed and very invalidated a whole lot I would just get really up set when someone started to tell there story to try to relate and tell me they had the same exact experience i would leave groups and fill really up set not seen or heard.
Jacinta thank you so much for your willingness to share and connect here in this space. We appreciate you doing so very much. We love you!
Hi - great info. If you've been able to hold space for a person and a few days later something comes to mind that might be helpful, is it OK to share? For example, a friend held space for me when I was feeling abandoned. A few days later, she suggested this podcast. I don't know if she already knew of you or went hunting for something that might help me. Either way, I've found your podcast really helpful and I'm working through 'How to Do The Work'. Thank you for all you do.
So glad you've found our podcast and it's supportive Cathy! If you're ever wondering if it's ok to share or not, you could first ask the other person if they're open to any suggestions. ❤ Welcome to the Soundboard community!
How to approach feeling excluded
You may find out most recent episode supportive for this: Episode 68 How To Deal With FOMO. Thank you for watching and connecting here Bridget ❤