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I disgusted by AL Jazeera's so called "report" on China. We Chinese supported your struggle in middle east but your media deliberately spread rumor or pick negative "news" on China. Shame on you!!!
There are several comments here saying that she should have showed respect to her mother. Y'all don't know the whole story. The psychological trauma that she's been through. Her mother should be the first person to protect her. She's an enabler.
Agee! Stop blaming the victim. Both parents are guilty as sins! This case needs publicity so that victims of incest can speak up & perpetrators can’t get away with it
Not true. Her mom’s generation is likely not very educated. You can’t blame someone who doesn’t know what to do in these situations. My mom isnt the smartest either and doesn’t make the best choices and even lies about things sometimes but she’s still a good person and I love her. You have to take a persons upbringing into consideration and not assume that everyone knows how to do the ‘right’ thing. I can tell you watching this that her mother isn’t that educated.
Did she grow up alone like Tarzan did? Did a crow bring her meat? A stray fed her milk? A helpful house rat changed her soiled diapers? Or a squirrel supported her through college? Now this vengeful spirit is back for blood. Abusing the mother, wire-tapping her father. While the folks aren't perfect! She sure thinks she is by hurling rocks. How about the father seeking her out for revenge too, after 7 years?
The most disgusting way to rationalize and minimize the severe trauma he caused. He might have been put in prison for 12 years but he is condemned for life. Good luck trying to get a job or doing anything at all after that sentence.
@@mundosanto anti pe do also rationale& minimize trauma of boy who been ra pe by pretty female preda tor,& when boy been mo lest by nurse on circumcision (by all same anti pe do here), hypocrite
@@tiendang7531 not forgiving only perpetuates generational curses sir... She threw her own father in prison not knowing what he went through as a kid that he probably didn't get justice for... Most child molesters were also molested
@@jss.2020 Are you for real?You expect her to forgive and understand what he did to her?He got what he deserves, you need to face the consequences of your actions. He could had break the chain and become a good father to her but no he decided to traumatize her. He did not care for her why should she care for him.That his battle to fight not hers.
It's nice to see that Li's fiancé is supporting her throughout this traumatizing process of gathering evidence. It's kinda sad to think there are so many partners out there that wouldn't do this for their significant other.
Lots of respect to her husband who supported her after knowing her past. She will have a wonderful life hopefully ahead of her and builds her own happiness.
This happens more than you think. My grand father raped my mom and aunts since they were toddlers. The abuse they endured was horrific and it's so disturbing that they put him on a postal and stand by his side now and demand the family to forgive and forget because it's the Christian thing to do. Predators and abusers hide in the church.
Every comment defending the mother, keep your opinions. You were not there and you do not know the pain of feeling helpless when as a child one is abused. Years and years of feeling insecure, unprotected. It is a horrible feeling. Let her be. This woman will find her inner peace in her own way. The treatment towards her mother is natural. The main caregiver did nothing to protect the child. As a result, there is deep resentment. I treated my own mother the same way but after therapy, now I have put aside the sentiments. It took me 30 years to heal and I am still healing for the years of abuse I suffered at the hands of my own biological father. On one can tell us how to handle such delicate matter. This pain belongs to us and we victims of child sexual abuse will figure out how to handle it. No one has the right to tell us how to behave towards our parents unless you are a license psychologist to offer an opinion.
Absolutely agree with you. A mother not doing her one and only basic job which is to protect her child…what kind of mother is that? The daughter’s behaviour towards her mother is justifiable imo…how horrible to have endured for so long….
I get frustrated at my own mother and felt the pain, anger and frustration Li felt when she threw the bowl and spoon on the ground. I still go to therapy to control my temper, but the trauma will always be there. We must learn how to manage how we feel about it and to eventually heal, learn to accept and forgive. But never forget.
@@jamillah2087 I think just like you with time and when she becomes a mother she will learn to forgive her mother. Her pain is deep that her mother did not or could not protect her. I feel that her mum is a victim as well due to fear and poverty . Wishing Li and her mum peace in their future.
@@gem246She’ll heal but that doesn’t necessarily mean she’ll forgive her mother because, she doesn’t have to. Sometimes anger is the healing. Healing is different for everyone. Forgiving your abuser’s enabler whose your own blood doesn’t mean that you’ve healed. You weren’t there, she was and she was a child at that. Stop pushing the “victims have to forgive their abuser and their enablers to move on” narrative. It’s actually not true in most cases.
When I was child, I was sexually assaulted by male family members and a neighbor. I was too young to understand but I never forgot the feeling. Unfortunately back then in a small town in China, nobody took it seriously and I didn't receive any help or support from anyone including my mother. I was blamed of my fault and bad luck. Thank God I left there and later the country after I grew up. My parents also divorced after my high school. Its been almost 30 years since then and I buried the pain deeply in heart. Im thankful that I have faith now and God's love has healed me. It might take a person's life long time to be fully recovered. Last year my father passed away and I didn't go back. In my heart, he was already dead when I was 18. My brother and sister didn't understand me because they didn't go through what I went through. I admire your courage to speak up and sincerely wish you all the best in the future. I hope you continue to heal until fully recovered. We can't choose our parents but we can choose our life. You are not alone and you will survive. Blessings to you and your husband.
@@Anna13991 the Same thing happened to me to when I was young I didn't understand what was happening. He was pretending as if we playing a game and I didn't want to he didn't directly touch me or abuse me but he would sort of press his thing against my body when my mother wasn't there. I haven't told my mom , it's just too much I don't know what to tell myself
@@Anna13991 congrats to both of you ladies have survive this traumas thank you also you shared your stories hopefully any women or girls more brave to come forward highlight whatever abused happening around just like the case in India of twins sisters end up abused by their grandfather , their aren't died earlier and grandmother too the nearest relative is their grandfather yet he took advantages of them till death end the stories , blesses the bright futures for both of you beautiful and brave ladies
It’s so sad in Asian countries being raped and molested is considered the “victims fault” or it brings “great shame” it shouldn’t be like that at all, they should hold the perpetrators accountable !
@@Juju-l3o they blamed on women because Asian women in general are filial to their parent , they kept silence of shames upon them self instead exposed to the world or to the knowledge of community too
Breaking the cycle, might be due to the younger generation are well educated since the government had been helping them in the current reformed system. Feel bad for the mom, but in this case "the child really need to live better than their previous generation" as a Chinese says... Her mom is powerless and weak cause she is stuck in her old way of living, lack of critical thinking and very dependable on someone else due to her limited education and depressed generation that she is from
It’s more than just luck. It’s strenght. She’s strong. Many abused people end up with abusive partners because they grew up it in, it’s not a sign of weekness. It’s human. She’s more than this. She broke the cycle of abuse. That’s so incredible. I wish every abused person would find the strenght to do this , it’s rare.
At five minutes and 17 seconds, she tells her mother don’t test my limits. It’s wonderful to see a woman who’s been violated coming back strong and not backing down. It took every bit of who I was to confront my father and it didn’t happen until I was over 40 years old.
Yes!! I didn't even know it was her father. The documentary wasted no time. I thought, "oh her husband wants her to cover up." Then I realized it was her dad.😲
@@CreepySilences 人面兽心 is a Chinese idiom and literal translation would be "human face, beast heart", but actually the meaning is "two faced, malicious person"; since it's an idiom you cannot translate it literally. Whole comment can be translated as "two faced malicious person(lit. human face, beast hear) is the way to describe such kind of a person." Don't trust in youtube translations 100%, always take it with a grain of salt.
Wow, I got goosebumps when she trew the plates in discussion with her mum. Thank you !!! It explained my childhood. I was abused from my uncle and my mum and grandmother were silent. I was an agressive kid screaming and hating my mum. Now i know why.vpowerful docu.
This is so powerful. I cried when she was confronting her mother. The one who was supposed to protect her, sent her back repeatedly to be abused. Both parents were equally evil.
Her mother was a victim also. There is no excuse for the violence she committed to her mum by throwing dishes. I feel sorry for her partner. This girl will never heal.
I feel her. Her mom is not perfect, a bad mother like what most people here say but she doesn't have to be like them, I agree with some people here, there's no need to be disrespectful. I know it's hard to give respect as respect should be earned but there's no need to attack her Mom like that , at least be kind and prove not only to her fiance but to herself that inspite of everything, she's nothing like her mother and father.
For some extra information, not only did Li's mother constantly send her to her father for money, but also when she told her mother the first time she was touched by her dad, her mother responded "It's ok, he's your dad, it's not a big deal." As the sexual assault escalated, when Li told her mother that her father started to use his finger to molest her, the mother responded "It's ok, your dad is a healthcare professional, he must be checking on you..." Then her dad kept doing this to her every day when he got a chance for three weeks while Li stayed with her dad in his city... Later on, the mother even told Li "I've talked to your dad, and he said you are always shaking your leg while he was there, you were seducing him..." I was shocked to see Li lose it with her mother, so I researched this case and found some reports in 2022. Now I don't blame her at all
That is incredulous. Mum is essentially an accomplice, complicit in enabling him to abuse and assault THEIR daughter. Perhaps, Mum suffered at his hands too.
Of course she knew. My mom & dad are exactly the same. I walked out & never forgive them. I won’t have children as a result. It’s even harder to forgive your parents for such betrayal after having your own child 😂 now that family is sth you already chose to create & not born into. I only wish her children can be free….
I don’t feel any pity for the mother. You’re her mother. You should’ve been her number 1 protector. You failed. You failed miserably. You’re an enabler. You’re worst to me than the offender.. because you’re the “mother” and you didn’t protect her, you didn’t report it, you pushed her to go back multiple times to her father just for money. As a woman and as a mother, I can’t accept this. I know. Because my mother did the same thing to me. The pain is unbearable. The shame is immense.
happy she is taking care of herself and not forcing herself to be in contact with her mother. shes not responsible for making her mother feel better about her wrongdoings. even if the mother herself was abused, she has no right to see her daughter after enabling abuse towards her as well
@@idksamir I totally agree. I’m a strong believer. Once you know better you can do better and I didn’t fully get that feeling even at the end with the mother. She was still playing the victim and still wanting it to be about her.
@@SMBiggestFan she in fact wasn't listening to her daughter. the daughter told her about the abuse and she did not report it to the police, instead encourage her to meet her dad for money? yeah, definitely her mom is at fault too.
Years ago, I thought about doing the same. The pain was destroying my life and I was living full of hate towards my parents. Now, with the help of therapy, I have moved on. I cannot gather enough evidence to prove the years of abuse. Yet, good for this woman that she could bring justice for herself.
I’m so glad the girl was brave enough to have her voice counted, to do this documentary and get justice. I am so proud and in awe of your strength and courage. Trauma from a young age never just goes. That’s what abusers don’t get. Wasn’t just “one of two seconds” as the father sickly explains, you’ve broken her completely from within. I pray this doesn’t define her for the rest of her life and she finds and cherishes any moments of happiness and peace in years to come.
Such a smart and strong girl! “You only can save yourself when you become strong!” Admire your strength and you are blessed to have a kind husband, God bless you!❤
Good for you girl. I did the same w mine too and I put him away for 8 years. I had non supportive famiy members too, but others did support me. You're going to be fine, you are so strong and you've dealt with your demons. Time to live! I also had a beautiful man who I'm still with who supported me in court and in my life and helped me heal. You will survive and thrive.
I was sexually abused as a little girl by an extended family member and once by a stranger. I was around 6 or 7yrs old. My Uncle has never been charged with what he did, he was a young teen at that time. I am now a grown adult and I have learned to forgive in my heart however I will never let him know that. My innocence as a little girl was taken away. It took a lot of guts for me to tell my mom. I have learned that I cannot change what happened to me however I can change how I look at what happened to me. I am okay not to pursue this with legal actions. Not saying what Li did was wrong because it wasn't. She needed to do this and I am so glad her dad got more time then what she said he should get. Li was very strong in what she did and the scars will never heal. I hope she will find healing in her heart and soul and mind. She was very brave in what she did and for her father's side of the family to berate her, is just pure disgust. They cannot even look at the fact of what their own brother, son, nephew did to his own daughter. They should he disgusted by it not be angry at Li for exposing what he did. It shows how low their morals are.
@demijour1234 hey friend, I went through very similar experiences to yours... one of the r*pes resulting in an unwanted pregnancy and abortion. No justice or accountability ever served. It's been a whole year of finally doing shadow work and opening up the shame and fullness of the experiences. I can definitely say that I'm healing little by little. It's not easy but it's a way out. Sending you my love 💓 thankyou for sharing your story.
@@chueikiir I am sorry to hear what you went through. Wounds can heal however scars will always be there. So., I am glad to hear you are healing each day and that is important. Thank you as well for sharing. I believe firmly when we share, it helps others to know they are not alone and their feelings are just the same as others when you may have thought they weren't. Sending Love, Hugs and Healing to you as well. 🫂❤❤❤🙏
She is very brave but I believe she couldn't have done this without a loving and supportive man by her side. He is the real deal. When she told him about her past abuse, he didn't kick her away but rather stayed and helped her fight and now is still picking up the pieces as she continues to heal. Well done to the husband 🎉🎉
@@tiendang7531I agree but I must say, if she doesn’t get real help then regardless of how much her husband loves her, anyone can only endure so much. There are some who think they can help their partner or anyone but can only do so much.
I got emotional seeing Li cry because she suffered so much in the past. Parents suppose to protect their children but some parents think they can take advantage of their innocent child. I am glad he is facing jail time.
It's quite typical of Chinese mothers to stand against their daughters even when the latter are innocent and the husbands are the perpetrators. They don't have a fear of God and they only have their own conscience to tell them what is right and what is wrong. Without the right moral compass, their conscience could be twisted and they're often driven by self perpetuation in their decisions.
I think all my angels that I was never sexually abused by my father. I was however physically, emotionally and psychologically abused by him. I hated him so much and now I have a loving husband who would never do this to me. I finally stood up to my father; and realized that he is still the same selfish man, a gaslighter. I am now living my life in my own terms.
or maybe your father was teaching you to be more responsible and went about it through discipline you wrongly interpret as abuse ? There is 2 sides to the story
@@AbdalMalik-ye1df If it was severe enough to label it as abuse, then it is. Even if it wasn't, it's clear that this lady has found some happiness and solace. Why question it at this point?
I feel you - my father was and is exactly the same. He beat me because I couldn't solve math questions and after that repeatedly promised he won't beat me again, but guess what - he did. He made me join a cult as a child and it took me years to realise the damage it did. At one point of time, he and my mother also hired a private investigator to stalk me and claimed that they have supernatural powers and could see what I was doing. Now I'm miles away from them and finally able to live my own life. It took me so many years to get to this point. I know a lot of people will say that my parents did things "for my own good". Please don't listen to such people - such mentality is partially responsible for enabling the abuse. No child deserves to be abused by their parents.
@ Over 90% of the abusers are men and when women do abuse, most are providing their children or committing the acts to appease a male. If MEN didn’t have this perversion, it would be nearly eradicated.
@ Over 90% of the convicted abusers are men. The women who are convicted largely did not commit the acts themselves but they rather supplied the children or did so to appease the man. If the male desire did not exist, it would not be a problem.
Parent's are supposed to watch over their kids, not rape them, or simply feign ignorance when the child report's such a horrendous incident. Telling to forgive such a person is easier said than done.
It's too difficult. First, you have to be ready to lose all your family to do so. Because they will blame YOU for bringing this shame publicly to the family instead of the actual abuser. Li doesn't have one in China anymore, so she has nothing to lose. And she's soooo brave and her husband is very supportive which is very hard to find another man like him.
I was sexually assaulted when I was 8 years old by my 19 year old cousin. Although I do not remember the events clearly, most of it has been blocked out by PTSD, I can remember crying about it afterwards to my parents and my parents telling me to keep quiet because it brings shame to the family. I am now 28 years old and wonder if I can still take legal action against that rapist of a cousin, he is almost 40 this year, never apologized nor owned up. He is happily married w a wife and two daughters, while I fear men, intimacy and still have to go to life long therapy and take antidepressants for the trauma.
Her mum is just as bad as her dad. She sent her daughter to get money from the dad knowing what the dad was doing to her daughter. She must have thought that was the payment for the money!! Both parents are evil. My heart goes out to this beautiful young woman. Try to find forgiveness as that’s the only way you can move forward. I know from my own experience. You’re a wonderful young, intelligent woman with a supportive husband by your side. Close the door on this part of your past and allow yourself a happy future. God Bless you both. ♥️♥️♥️
Exactly! I’m shook to my core so many people in the comment section are defending the mom and expect the girl to be respectful and understanding towards her. What the actual f??
@@irenenergysexual abuse is prevalent in Asian culture as Asian kids are generally expected to be blindly filial to the parents. Values clash but these behaviour needs to end. This video is the future of Chinese values
I’m glad she have a strong and patient partner next to her! He understands what she went through and needs time, patience and love from him! Bravo to both of them! ❤
Li, if youre reading this, I'm so proud of you. You are strong and an inspiration to every woman who has had to go through this. I hope you have a long and happy life with your husband.
It's okay to understand and accept her mother was also a victim but still be estranged from her. She was clearly hurting when with her mum and also hurting the mum in return. Sometimes it's better like that. Glad the dad got what he deserved what despicable man. Such a brave woman, hope you keep healing from it.
Correct! Estrangement is inevitable. I’m glad she threw her dad to jail & not invite her mom to her wedding. A break from traditional patriarchal values. Well done the young Chinese couple
This young woman is so strong. She was the child, she was the victim. Her father violated her, and her mother knew and did nothing to protect her. She is pursuing justice for that little girl, and I can only respect her strength and bravery.
She is very strong girl. I feel sad for her but I admire her strength and courage after many years. Unfortunately sexual harassment is big problem in world including China and many women even don’t know what’s happening with them in work life and personal life. I feel so sad how a father can become such a monster. I hope in future she finds inner peace in her heart and live happy. This is a lesson for all women’s please don’t quite for those who abuse you or rape you or did anything to you. Rise your voice and let monsters in jails.
@@sdalby9127I agree and I don’t find her strong at all but vengeful, angry, having anger outbursts,etc.. I am sure she is not an easy person to be around.
@@TrinhNguyen-sh4fj I suppose your interpretation of being strong is to do the opposite of what she did? Like form a loving relationship with her parents and take care of them for no reason other than the fact that they're her parents? If she did that, she'd have paved herself a fast track to self-destruction. Your lack of empathy is cancerous to humankind.
@@TrinhNguyen-sh4fjThat is why men should speak up and seek justice as well. Instead of keeping it inside in fear of being ridiculed or not believed. Keeping it a secret would only make it manifest and to cope they subject the same trauma to other people. In order to break the cycle of abuse we have to learn to break the cycle of silence.
Li is very lucky to have a kind and supporting man who supported her through the whole healing process. His genuine love taught her to trust and love again. It's so heart breaking to know that her very own mother who should be her first protector did not do anything when she told her about the abuse and assault. Li wants to build a new life and leave everything in the past even though the trauma will always be there. She wants her wedding to be the happiest day of her life and it makes sense that she didn't invite her mother.
Really raw and touching. Li is incredibly brave and strong, I'm glad she sought and got justice. Hope she will continue counselling to negate her ingrained anger. Bravo to her empathetic boyfriend and now husband; she was lucky to have his pillar of strength, respect and love throughout her journey, which I believe softens her heart to love. Eventhough the mum was wrong and neglectful not undertaking any remedial actions, I feel for her too; she doesn't appear to have support from anyone; maybe her actions - her best which is far far from enough - is all she is capable of. She probably had a tough childhood too. It's extremely hard for Li to forgive her; hopefully as Li gets older and have her own family, may she find room in her heart for forgiveness to her mum. Lastly I hope this well presented documentary will inspire more abused victims to come forth and out their abusers.
It’s awful how her abuser father always deflects the blame, doesn’t take responsibility or acknowledge her pain. I’m so sorry you had to go through this. You deserved a father who would have protected you and would go to the ends of the earth for you. It’s understandable that you were frustrated with your mom because she let the abuse happen to you. May justice be served!
That so called man stole her innocence and stole her life, look at her suffering! May he be sent behind bars, 10 years is too short, he robbed her whole life. Li, wishing you a joyous rest of your life with your husband, may you both love and encourage each other always!
First dialogue: They had a quite peaceful conversation. She was polite and respectful. He did not feel he did something wrong dismissin it with fate, got wrong parents...ladted only two secunds... When she said it was painful he ignored her. He did not even say sorry. This guy regrets nothing. Beautiful lady I hope she gets closure agter making this public ❤ thanks to friend for supporting her.
All her mother had to say is "You're right. I was a coward. I allowed you to suffer so that I didn't have to be uncomfortable. I'm sorry. I understand the damage we have caused will affect you for the rest of your life. I was supposed to protect you and I betrayed you. I love you. Please allow me to help make this right". That's it. It's the excuses and lack of accountability that is setting her off.
She needs professional help. I've met some abused people and they take their anger out on anyone, their husbands, their kids. I'm not saying it's their fault but they need help. Hopes she finds peace.
Therapy by bullying the weak like it’s the nature of the bees 😂 hope she doesn’t become either of her parents, years of self-bullying turns to her mom but hopefully she gets help & not spill it on her husband & kids. The generational trauma ends with her! Bravery for speaking up & taking actions
unless we learn to let go of our ego and its pride, we will ceaselessly torture ourselves with past events. if you think about it, it's all about the "thought" of what others have done to us. the ego is the center of all this mischief. the past events is over and done with, yet the ego is full of vindictiveness and hurt. the physical trauma is long past, yet the psychological trauma is constantly being replayed by its ego. we need to detach ourselves from our ego and pride in order to heal.
@@whatever5575 This is not possible for pretty much everyone, because we are human beings. She is traumatised and it's not because of her ego and pride - that is very insulting, and blaming the victim. She has been extremely brave and is moving on really well - it takes time. When people have been abused you need to be understanding and compassionate - not spout unrealistic spiritual advice.
@@spicybiscuit88 it's not blaming the victim but exploring why we hold onto the trauma and let it affect us negatively for years. the physical trauma is long healed yet the psychological trauma is still being replayed in her brain, making her miserable for many years. the goal is to move beyond the psychological trauma and not let it affect us negatively. the mechanism of holding onto trauma is more or less the same with most of us human beings. it is the memory of it being replayed by the wounded ego. the ego with its pride and self-image is the root of many human conflicts and that is an undeniable fact.
This was similar to philippines case in raffy tulfo show. A girl who got raped by his father and got pregnant. The mother and her siblings didnt believe her, until the girl went to that show and asked for help. DNA testing was done and it was proven that the father was the dad of that daughters kid. The girl was crying and telling her mom that "why you didnt believe me, i am your daughter but you chose to protect him. Have mercy on me mom.. The girl has every right to be mad.
@@johnp7999exactly I don’t know why people are so proud of “not hitting “ their spouses or treating them with respect, This is what we are supposed to be doing!!!
As a girl I am so proud of you sister . We have to support each other ,we are not safe even in our homes now . Keep going sister you are my hero ,I support u thanks
Notice how she rocks back and forth on the bench as she talks with her dad in the park, she’s trying to self soothe because of how unwell she feels being near him talking about what happened
When she confronted her mum as an adult, it was so profound and amazing strength. Bless her for speaking out! The pain of breaking the silence. Thankyou for sharing your story. ♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️ so happy for her to conquer and say this was not her fault.
the immense courage this lady mustered to fight for herself. massive respect to her! thank you for showing the world victims don’t have to stay victims forever and abusers can be brought to justice
I think most females especially when they were kids would have experienced sexual assault or wrong touching, but only realised the meaning after growing up.
To face her parents AGAIN, seeing their indifferent facial expressions and responses as to why they allowed the trauma to haunt her... This isn't easy.
She did the right thing by not inviting her mom to the wedding. If I was the mother, I would've punished the father myself even if it meant I went to jail for life. No mercy. Her mother is a disgraceful coward for doing nothing. An utter insult to good mothers around the world.
Her mom didn't have the strength to fight for her daughter. Not everyone in this world is strong. Glad she got justice. Now therapy can help her even more
@@NHJDT that's partly why the father did it. He knew that the mother was powerless and needed him financially. He had that leverage. This is why women need to be independent.
This is an incredibly tragic story but one of undeniable courage. I mourn for the loss of family but I also applaud her immense bravery. Her speech is so clear and emphatic and her voice is hardly shaking given her pain. What must she have gone through to come to this closure. Justice is finally served but her childhood is gone and can never come back. Her father broke the family and her mother abetted him. I hope that her husband will treat her well and they will have beautiful children and live happily ever after. There should be no other ending to this story but happy ever after. Wishing you peace, joy, love and light, Li. Love from Singapore
When she talked to her mother, I was so proud of her. Not many of us are strong enough to stand up for ourselves to our parents. She set strict boundaries, very good.
Well done for confronting your abuser and enabler so powerfully,your pain,torment and suffering is felt by not only us viewers but especially your dear partner 💕 I pray in your recovery as you journey forward and hope one day you may find the strength to forgive to give yourself peace of mind and the ability to perhaps have a family of your own to love and cherish as you should've been. Sending love and strength from a fellow survivor...Kia Kaha from NewZealand 🩷🤍🩷
She should not be in contact with her mom anymore. It’s too traumatic for her. Her mom is only thinking of herself. She’s brave to stand up for herself. Her parents owed her their life. They don’t deserve her. They should be locked up in jail. I am so sorry for what happened to you, girl. Hope you get the justice you long deserved for. 🙏
1. Thank you Al Jazeera for making this video. 2. Li, you are incredibly brave for having gone through this. As a survivor of several sexual assaults throughout my childhood and adulthood and now as a trauma therapist, I know the road to recovery is long but not impossible. I hope you will continue therapy. 3. There is no such thing as "I didnt know". Every mother or care-giver/guardian knows on some level when their child is being sexually abused. They just go into denial out of fear, their own shame, they too freeze and disassociate, like the victim. May you and husband have a prosperous and happy life together. 🙏
@@jennifer12366 forgiving, when we are victimized, we tend to blame ourselves. What did we do that caused someone to act this way towards us. It haunts us as victims, we relive this situation by playing it back in our minds, what if I did this instead of that, was it because I did this and not that. We relive the pattern of trauma over and over again. We have to forgive ourselves that this was an act upon us that was not deserved not our fault, we are victims. It’s not because we were to pretty, to thin, to weak, to happy, or because we were waiting for a bus to late at night, any one of us could become a victim of an assault/ sexual assault, it changes the way we behave, our thought process, our sense of trust, our life. Forgive yourself, give yourself grace, find therapy and ways to cope.
This was so hard to watch 😢I was also molested as a child 😭 & I feel her pain especially when she's with her mother who was supposed to protect her!!!! 💔 This was really heartbreaking 😢 but I'm so proud 👏 of her to fight back & speak up against her abusers!!! God bless her & her fiancé 🙏 ❤️ ❤❤❤❤. May they live happily ever after.
Her husband is kind. But he should not be her sole support system. I really hope she gets professional help for her anger. Especially if she's going to have children. Her outbursts would be terrifying to a child.😢
I agree and my brother married a woman like that. They are not pleasant people to be around. I had an evil and abusive so called father so I know how it is. Luckily, I did not turn out bad.
@@LoloO42it seems that you have biased option of her, her anger came from years of traumatic experience without any support from her mom and lifelong negative influence from her as well, she didn't outburst toward anyone else, she'd give all her love to her baby cause that's what she long for
@@qiuxian9700I don’t agree as I have seen how crazy people can be and guess who they take it out on? Their innocent kids if they have any. It is better if she doesn’t have any.
@@TrinhNguyen-sh4fj There are certainly some people in this world deal with that kind of situation differently like you mentioned unfortunately but based on what i saw she hasn't got any anger issues, she showed nothing but gratitude toward anyone who helped her, she's longing for change for the better and she resented how she was treated as kid so much so that she would go a completely opposite way
@@TrinhNguyen-sh4fjVietnam has similar culture to China so the potent patriarchy impacts people…my dad molested me too. I walked out of the family & now getting therapy to help me manage my anger & mental health. Getting there, we chose our own fate! She needs professional therapy to help her navigate her own marriage & possibly motherhood. Cheers to her taking brave steps to put her rapist dad in jail & keep her mom out of her wedding. The next chapter of her life is up to her.
What a tough Woman she is. With all the trauma & pain she endured Li is so incredibly strong. If she found a level of peace and can move forward that's so deserving of her. What a beautiful Bride she was and to have her Husband right by her side through it all was everything...💖
My heart grieves for the pain, loneliness, and solation you have gone through since you were a child. You have been extremely brave in facing this trauma and confronting your parents. Many young women in similar circumstances will see this video and find the strength to do what you have done. I wish you a life of happiness with your husband. What a wonderful man to support with all of his heart. He is your teacher in showing you not all people are like your parents. I wish continued inner healing for you as well.
i feel so sorry for her💔 the baggage she's been carrying all these years. May she heal and move on to a peaceful and loving environment with her partner.
So much of this reminds me of my life... especially the way she talks to her mother. She's angry that the mother didn't do anything to protect her... The way she expresses herself clearly and yet doesn't get good responses from her mother. Christ... I empathize with her in so many ways... This happens more than people think. And it happens to people just walking around looking normal, carrying this insane weight for their entire lives... It's crippling.
That was painful to watch. I'm a dentist. I returned to the US for grad school ( specialty residency) in 2002 and befriended a Vietnamese resident who had also been raped by her father years ago after they had moved to the US during the "boat people" period of the war there. It was all painful stuff
I was never sexually abused by my father, but I was physically abused by him for years, and not only did my mom never stop him, she also instigated it. I feel Li's anger to the core of my being.
She's a brave girl with courage and supports to get justice and face the accused. Wish her a happy life from now on. Hope other victims learn justice is available.
She is extremely brave and smart with a strong warm heart.❤ her husband is such a supportive man.❤ I wish them all love and luck. I hope she continues to do whats best for her and she will heal❤❤❤
i will never understand having 6 daughters myself how any father could do any harm to such precious innocents who have total trust and love for you, a delicate fragile flower, they are a blank sheet of paper, paint love, care, gentleness all things good, let them make mistakes and be gentle to them, love always wins
My mom let my grandpa and dad abuse us. I am so glad she confronted her mom. As a parent now, I think my mother was complicit and enabled the crime. She's just as guilty.
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You are very brave, all the very best for your future may you now be free from your past, much love from New Zealand ❤
I disgusted by AL Jazeera's so called "report" on China. We Chinese supported your struggle in middle east but your media deliberately spread rumor or pick negative "news" on China. Shame on you!!!
Thank you 🙏🏽 for sharing this.
@@bighousee😮😮
Are you able to remove comments that you don’t like?
There are several comments here saying that she should have showed respect to her mother. Y'all don't know the whole story. The psychological trauma that she's been through. Her mother should be the first person to protect her. She's an enabler.
Agee! Stop blaming the victim. Both parents are guilty as sins! This case needs publicity so that victims of incest can speak up & perpetrators can’t get away with it
Not true. Her mom’s generation is likely not very educated. You can’t blame someone who doesn’t know what to do in these situations. My mom isnt the smartest either and doesn’t make the best choices and even lies about things sometimes but she’s still a good person and I love her. You have to take a persons upbringing into consideration and not assume that everyone knows how to do the ‘right’ thing. I can tell you watching this that her mother isn’t that educated.
@@davidpak271 ❤
@@davidpak271
Correct! Her mom is trapped in a situation. You will never understand what she gone thru if you haven't experience it.
Did she grow up alone like Tarzan did? Did a crow bring her meat? A stray fed her milk? A helpful house rat changed her soiled diapers? Or a squirrel supported her through college? Now this vengeful spirit is back for blood. Abusing the mother, wire-tapping her father. While the folks aren't perfect! She sure thinks she is by hurling rocks. How about the father seeking her out for revenge too, after 7 years?
For him to gaslight her and said "it was only for a few seconds" OMG!!!!
So proud of you for standing up for yourself.
disgusting!
As if the length of time determined the level of the abuse!
The most disgusting way to rationalize and minimize the severe trauma he caused. He might have been put in prison for 12 years but he is condemned for life. Good luck trying to get a job or doing anything at all after that sentence.
My mom ha rassed me when i was a young boy, but i not wish to jail her. But female dare bcoz more evil.
@@mundosanto anti pe do also rationale& minimize trauma of boy who been ra pe by pretty female preda tor,& when boy been mo lest by nurse on circumcision (by all same anti pe do here), hypocrite
Never have I been more proud of someone I never met. Thank you for speaking up and confronting your parents. You WILL heal!
She will! And inspire lots of others. The brave young Chinese couple chose their own fate & break the generational patriarchal curses of the parents
@@tiendang7531 not forgiving only perpetuates generational curses sir... She threw her own father in prison not knowing what he went through as a kid that he probably didn't get justice for... Most child molesters were also molested
@@tiendang7531 she threw him in prison thinking that would resolve her issues but you can still see it hasn't
@@jss.2020 Are you for real?You expect her to forgive and understand what he did to her?He got what he deserves, you need to face the consequences of your actions. He could had break the chain and become a good father to her but no he decided to traumatize her. He did not care for her why should she care for him.That his battle to fight not hers.
@canella411 if he didn't care about her why did he meet her? She's just as selfish as he is because she only met him to set him up for a confession.
It's nice to see that Li's fiancé is supporting her throughout this traumatizing process of gathering evidence. It's kinda sad to think there are so many partners out there that wouldn't do this for their significant other.
I agree. I believe his presence in her life has given her much strength to move forward
It’s so sad that she has to defend herself against her dad … who should’ve protected her 😢
Lots of respect to her husband who supported her after knowing her past. She will have a wonderful life hopefully ahead of her and builds her own happiness.
Mine didn't know what to do, because he said it sounded like a horror movie!
So glad she has a strong man beside now wish her best of future with her husband.
This happens more than you think. My grand father raped my mom and aunts since they were toddlers. The abuse they endured was horrific and it's so disturbing that they put him on a postal and stand by his side now and demand the family to forgive and forget because it's the Christian thing to do. Predators and abusers hide in the church.
Mosques too
🙏🙏🙏
@@devinadoll217 yeah and all those religious building, temple etc.
On mom’s side or dad’s side?
@@SMBiggestFan does it matter?
Every comment defending the mother, keep your opinions. You were not there and you do not know the pain of feeling helpless when as a child one is abused. Years and years of feeling insecure, unprotected. It is a horrible feeling. Let her be. This woman will find her inner peace in her own way. The treatment towards her mother is natural. The main caregiver did nothing to protect the child. As a result, there is deep resentment. I treated my own mother the same way but after therapy, now I have put aside the sentiments. It took me 30 years to heal and I am still healing for the years of abuse I suffered at the hands of my own biological father. On one can tell us how to handle such delicate matter. This pain belongs to us and we victims of child sexual abuse will figure out how to handle it. No one has the right to tell us how to behave towards our parents unless you are a license psychologist to offer an opinion.
Absolutely agree with you. A mother not doing her one and only basic job which is to protect her child…what kind of mother is that? The daughter’s behaviour towards her mother is justifiable imo…how horrible to have endured for so long….
@@jamillah2087 This should be a top comment
I get frustrated at my own mother and felt the pain, anger and frustration Li felt when she threw the bowl and spoon on the ground. I still go to therapy to control my temper, but the trauma will always be there. We must learn how to manage how we feel about it and to eventually heal, learn to accept and forgive. But never forget.
@@jamillah2087 I think just like you with time and when she becomes a mother she will learn to forgive her mother. Her pain is deep that her mother did not or could not protect her. I feel that her mum is a victim as well due to fear and poverty . Wishing Li and her mum peace in their future.
@@gem246She’ll heal but that doesn’t necessarily mean she’ll forgive her mother because, she doesn’t have to. Sometimes anger is the healing. Healing is different for everyone. Forgiving your abuser’s enabler whose your own blood doesn’t mean that you’ve healed. You weren’t there, she was and she was a child at that. Stop pushing the “victims have to forgive their abuser and their enablers to move on” narrative. It’s actually not true in most cases.
When I was child, I was sexually assaulted by male family members and a neighbor. I was too young to understand but I never forgot the feeling. Unfortunately back then in a small town in China, nobody took it seriously and I didn't receive any help or support from anyone including my mother. I was blamed of my fault and bad luck. Thank God I left there and later the country after I grew up. My parents also divorced after my high school. Its been almost 30 years since then and I buried the pain deeply in heart. Im thankful that I have faith now and God's love has healed me. It might take a person's life long time to be fully recovered. Last year my father passed away and I didn't go back. In my heart, he was already dead when I was 18. My brother and sister didn't understand me because they didn't go through what I went through. I admire your courage to speak up and sincerely wish you all the best in the future. I hope you continue to heal until fully recovered. We can't choose our parents but we can choose our life. You are not alone and you will survive. Blessings to you and your husband.
@@Anna13991 the Same thing happened to me to when I was young I didn't understand what was happening. He was pretending as if we playing a game and I didn't want to he didn't directly touch me or abuse me but he would sort of press his thing against my body when my mother wasn't there. I haven't told my mom , it's just too much I don't know what to tell myself
@@Anna13991 congrats to both of you ladies have survive this traumas thank you also you shared your stories hopefully any women or girls more brave to come forward highlight whatever abused happening around just like the case in India of twins sisters end up abused by their grandfather , their aren't died earlier and grandmother too the nearest relative is their grandfather yet he took advantages of them till death end the stories , blesses the bright futures for both of you beautiful and brave ladies
It’s so sad in Asian countries being raped and molested is considered the “victims fault” or it brings “great shame” it shouldn’t be like that at all, they should hold the perpetrators accountable !
@@Juju-l3o they blamed on women because Asian women in general are filial to their parent , they kept silence of shames upon them self instead exposed to the world or to the knowledge of community too
@@nancynahnigoh5508 I could never imagine that for my children or anyone else’s children.
She’s lucky to have a great partner, loving and caring person, all the best beautiful.
This young chinese couple chose their own fate different from the parents. Well done
Breaking the cycle, might be due to the younger generation are well educated since the government had been helping them in the current reformed system. Feel bad for the mom, but in this case "the child really need to live better than their previous generation" as a Chinese says... Her mom is powerless and weak cause she is stuck in her old way of living, lack of critical thinking and very dependable on someone else due to her limited education and depressed generation that she is from
@@joesama3282same with my parents. My generation is changing things though
It’s more than just luck. It’s strenght. She’s strong. Many abused people end up with abusive partners because they grew up it in, it’s not a sign of weekness. It’s human. She’s more than this. She broke the cycle of abuse. That’s so incredible. I wish every abused person would find the strenght to do this , it’s rare.
At five minutes and 17 seconds, she tells her mother don’t test my limits. It’s wonderful to see a woman who’s been violated coming back strong and not backing down. It took every bit of who I was to confront my father and it didn’t happen until I was over 40 years old.
Any one else felt creeped out when she went to meet her dad and he commented, you are wearing so little, knowing what he did to her?
人面兽心就是形容这种人
Yes!! I didn't even know it was her father. The documentary wasted no time. I thought, "oh her husband wants her to cover up." Then I realized it was her dad.😲
@@erinyang426 Please don't insult animals by comparing that monster that is her father to the animals.
Me!
@@CreepySilences 人面兽心 is a Chinese idiom and literal translation would be "human face, beast heart", but actually the meaning is "two faced, malicious person"; since it's an idiom you cannot translate it literally. Whole comment can be translated as "two faced malicious person(lit. human face, beast hear) is the way to describe such kind of a person." Don't trust in youtube translations 100%, always take it with a grain of salt.
Wow, I got goosebumps when she trew the plates in discussion with her mum. Thank you !!! It explained my childhood. I was abused from my uncle and my mum and grandmother were silent. I was an agressive kid screaming and hating my mum. Now i know why.vpowerful docu.
Im so sorry to hear that💔 you are so strong, Praying for healing and peace for you, God bless you✝️🙏❤️
Stay strong❤
This is so powerful. I cried when she was confronting her mother. The one who was supposed to protect her, sent her back repeatedly to be abused. Both parents were equally evil.
I wouldn’t say equal. But yeah… her mom failed her.
@@gleegigi I wouldn’t say she’s evil, however she was definitely weak, selfish, and a coward.
Her mother was a victim also. There is no excuse for the violence she committed to her mum by throwing dishes. I feel sorry for her partner. This girl will never heal.
@@MovinOnBob Her mother are also at fault
I feel her. Her mom is not perfect, a bad mother like what most people here say but she doesn't have to be like them, I agree with some people here, there's no need to be disrespectful. I know it's hard to give respect as respect should be earned but there's no need to attack her Mom like that , at least be kind and prove not only to her fiance but to herself that inspite of everything, she's nothing like her mother and father.
You are extremely brave for sharing your story and doing what you did. Thank you
For some extra information, not only did Li's mother constantly send her to her father for money, but also when she told her mother the first time she was touched by her dad, her mother responded "It's ok, he's your dad, it's not a big deal." As the sexual assault escalated, when Li told her mother that her father started to use his finger to molest her, the mother responded "It's ok, your dad is a healthcare professional, he must be checking on you..." Then her dad kept doing this to her every day when he got a chance for three weeks while Li stayed with her dad in his city... Later on, the mother even told Li "I've talked to your dad, and he said you are always shaking your leg while he was there, you were seducing him..." I was shocked to see Li lose it with her mother, so I researched this case and found some reports in 2022. Now I don't blame her at all
That is incredulous. Mum is essentially an accomplice, complicit in enabling him to abuse and assault THEIR daughter. Perhaps, Mum suffered at his hands too.
Woah. This was real, raw, and emotional. Great Documentary.
Thanks for watching! 🙌
@@aljazeeraenglish wonderfully presented.
The way the dad tried to justify it. What a pathetic man. The mom is just as bad. Guarantee she knew about it the whole time as she was never shocked.
Of course she knew. My mom & dad are exactly the same. I walked out & never forgive them. I won’t have children as a result. It’s even harder to forgive your parents for such betrayal after having your own child 😂 now that family is sth you already chose to create & not born into. I only wish her children can be free….
@@tiendang7531 I understand. If you don't have children, it's another loss. It's ok to have children. Just don't treat them like your parents did.
@@somerandomfella Not really as not having kids is not a meet all end all. In some cases, it is better to not have kids.
@@somerandomfellanot having kids is not a loss. You have all the time in the world to cultivate yourself.
@@tiendang7531 fair enough.. hello fellow Viets too 👋😂
I don’t feel any pity for the mother.
You’re her mother. You should’ve been her number 1 protector. You failed. You failed miserably. You’re an enabler. You’re worst to me than the offender.. because you’re the “mother” and you didn’t protect her, you didn’t report it, you pushed her to go back multiple times to her father just for money.
As a woman and as a mother, I can’t accept this. I know. Because my mother did the same thing to me. The pain is unbearable. The shame is immense.
happy she is taking care of herself and not forcing herself to be in contact with her mother. shes not responsible for making her mother feel better about her wrongdoings. even if the mother herself was abused, she has no right to see her daughter after enabling abuse towards her as well
@@idksamir I totally agree. I’m a strong believer. Once you know better you can do better and I didn’t fully get that feeling even at the end with the mother. She was still playing the victim and still wanting it to be about her.
How is it the mom’s fault? She raised her daughter from a baby. It’s not entirely mom’s fault unless she wasn’t listening to her daughter.
@@SMBiggestFan she in fact wasn't listening to her daughter. the daughter told her about the abuse and she did not report it to the police, instead encourage her to meet her dad for money? yeah, definitely her mom is at fault too.
@@SMBiggestFan why was she sending a teenager all alone to her abuser repeatedly for money after she told her what he does whenever she goes?
@@SMBiggestFan people like you ,with that mentality, utterly disgust me. It's purely dispicable.
Years ago, I thought about doing the same. The pain was destroying my life and I was living full of hate towards my parents. Now, with the help of therapy, I have moved on. I cannot gather enough evidence to prove the years of abuse. Yet, good for this woman that she could bring justice for herself.
I’m so glad the girl was brave enough to have her voice counted, to do this documentary and get justice. I am so proud and in awe of your strength and courage. Trauma from a young age never just goes. That’s what abusers don’t get. Wasn’t just “one of two seconds” as the father sickly explains, you’ve broken her completely from within. I pray this doesn’t define her for the rest of her life and she finds and cherishes any moments of happiness and peace in years to come.
Such a smart and strong girl! “You only can save yourself when you become strong!” Admire your strength and you are blessed to have a kind husband, God bless you!❤
Good for you girl. I did the same w mine too and I put him away for 8 years. I had non supportive famiy members too, but others did support me. You're going to be fine, you are so strong and you've dealt with your demons. Time to live! I also had a beautiful man who I'm still with who supported me in court and in my life and helped me heal. You will survive and thrive.
❤❤❤
❤
Prayers for your continued strength and resilience...we stand with the survivors of childhood SA
I was sexually abused as a little girl by an extended family member and once by a stranger. I was around 6 or 7yrs old. My Uncle has never been charged with what he did, he was a young teen at that time. I am now a grown adult and I have learned to forgive in my heart however I will never let him know that. My innocence as a little girl was taken away. It took a lot of guts for me to tell my mom. I have learned that I cannot change what happened to me however I can change how I look at what happened to me. I am okay not to pursue this with legal actions. Not saying what Li did was wrong because it wasn't. She needed to do this and I am so glad her dad got more time then what she said he should get.
Li was very strong in what she did and the scars will never heal. I hope she will find healing in her heart and soul and mind. She was very brave in what she did and for her father's side of the family to berate her, is just pure disgust. They cannot even look at the fact of what their own brother, son, nephew did to his own daughter. They should he disgusted by it not be angry at Li for exposing what he did. It shows how low their morals are.
@demijour1234 hey friend,
I went through very similar experiences to yours... one of the r*pes resulting in an unwanted pregnancy and abortion. No justice or accountability ever served. It's been a whole year of finally doing shadow work and opening up the shame and fullness of the experiences.
I can definitely say that I'm healing little by little.
It's not easy but it's a way out.
Sending you my love 💓 thankyou for sharing your story.
@@chueikiir I am sorry to hear what you went through. Wounds can heal however scars will always be there. So., I am glad to hear you are healing each day and that is important. Thank you as well for sharing. I believe firmly when we share, it helps others to know they are not alone and their feelings are just the same as others when you may have thought they weren't. Sending Love, Hugs and Healing to you as well. 🫂❤❤❤🙏
Sometimes, you have to take matters into your own hands, ma ni**a.
With very sharp object and an unwavering determination.
No one deserves to go through this horrible experience.
It is far more common than anyone realizes. Boys and girls have their lives destroyed by sick adults who know better.
好心疼，女孩，你的痛苦只有自己知道.... 你很勇敢地面對自己的痛處、黑暗處，你很棒，還很年輕，未來的路還很長遠，祝福妳！！
She is very brave but I believe she couldn't have done this without a loving and supportive man by her side. He is the real deal. When she told him about her past abuse, he didn't kick her away but rather stayed and helped her fight and now is still picking up the pieces as she continues to heal. Well done to the husband 🎉🎉
A true love
He is a great supportive husband!
He is a good guy but I hope she doesn’t go crazy and attack him in her anger outbursts. People like her are hard to be around.
@@TrinhNguyen-sh4fjshe needs therapy. They both chose their own fate! Well done to the husband
@@tiendang7531I agree but I must say, if she doesn’t get real help then regardless of how much her husband loves her, anyone can only endure so much. There are some who think they can help their partner or anyone but can only do so much.
I got emotional seeing Li cry because she suffered so much in the past. Parents suppose to protect their children but some parents think they can take advantage of their innocent child. I am glad he is facing jail time.
@MaiXoxo3 oh, her pain. I feel it.
It's quite typical of Chinese mothers to stand against their daughters even when the latter are innocent and the husbands are the perpetrators. They don't have a fear of God and they only have their own conscience to tell them what is right and what is wrong. Without the right moral compass, their conscience could be twisted and they're often driven by self perpetuation in their decisions.
"I never wanted to be like my mum, waiting for someone to save me!" ....
What a powerful statement!
I think all my angels that I was never sexually abused by my father. I was however physically, emotionally and psychologically abused by him. I hated him so much and now I have a loving husband who would never do this to me. I finally stood up to my father; and realized that he is still the same selfish man, a gaslighter. I am now living my life in my own terms.
@@Glytched356 I did the same NO CONTACT
or maybe your father was teaching you to be more responsible and went about it through discipline you wrongly interpret as abuse ? There is 2 sides to the story
@@AbdalMalik-ye1df If it was severe enough to label it as abuse, then it is. Even if it wasn't, it's clear that this lady has found some happiness and solace. Why question it at this point?
I feel you - my father was and is exactly the same. He beat me because I couldn't solve math questions and after that repeatedly promised he won't beat me again, but guess what - he did. He made me join a cult as a child and it took me years to realise the damage it did. At one point of time, he and my mother also hired a private investigator to stalk me and claimed that they have supernatural powers and could see what I was doing. Now I'm miles away from them and finally able to live my own life. It took me so many years to get to this point. I know a lot of people will say that my parents did things "for my own good". Please don't listen to such people - such mentality is partially responsible for enabling the abuse. No child deserves to be abused by their parents.
@@AbdalMalik-ye1df It's still abuse.
Some people just don’t deserve children.
All children deserve functional parents but not all parents deserve children. It’s too hard.
@@tiendang7531 Some children don’t deserve parents too.
@@TrinhNguyen-sh4fj yes but here "Some parents don't deserve children" as parents are the predators here
Men abusing their children really is a worldwide problem. It’s not isolated to one region, country, seems evil is just human nature.
It's not just men but ok
@
Over 90% of the abusers are men and when women do abuse, most are providing their children or committing the acts to appease a male.
If MEN didn’t have this perversion, it would be nearly eradicated.
@
Over 90% of the convicted abusers are men. The women who are convicted largely did not commit the acts themselves but they rather supplied the children or did so to appease the man.
If the male desire did not exist, it would not be a problem.
Parent's are supposed to watch over their kids, not rape them, or simply feign ignorance when the child report's such a horrendous incident. Telling to forgive such a person is easier said than done.
What she has done can set up a great example for many other victims in China. She is a brave soldier! ❤
Source?.
It's too difficult. First, you have to be ready to lose all your family to do so. Because they will blame YOU for bringing this shame publicly to the family instead of the actual abuser. Li doesn't have one in China anymore, so she has nothing to lose. And she's soooo brave and her husband is very supportive which is very hard to find another man like him.
I was sexually assaulted when I was 8 years old by my 19 year old cousin. Although I do not remember the events clearly, most of it has been blocked out by PTSD, I can remember crying about it afterwards to my parents and my parents telling me to keep quiet because it brings shame to the family. I am now 28 years old and wonder if I can still take legal action against that rapist of a cousin, he is almost 40 this year, never apologized nor owned up. He is happily married w a wife and two daughters, while I fear men, intimacy and still have to go to life long therapy and take antidepressants for the trauma.
Him saying "it was only one or two sec", so disgusting. I feel so proud of her for standing up for herself even after many years, she is brave enough.
Her mum is just as bad as her dad. She sent her daughter to get money from the dad knowing what the dad was doing to her daughter. She must have thought that was the payment for the money!! Both parents are evil. My heart goes out to this beautiful young woman. Try to find forgiveness as that’s the only way you can move forward. I know from my own experience. You’re a wonderful young, intelligent woman with a supportive husband by your side. Close the door on this part of your past and allow yourself a happy future. God Bless you both. ♥️♥️♥️
Exactly! I’m shook to my core so many people in the comment section are defending the mom and expect the girl to be respectful and understanding towards her. What the actual f??
@@irenenergysexual abuse is prevalent in Asian culture as Asian kids are generally expected to be blindly filial to the parents. Values clash but these behaviour needs to end. This video is the future of Chinese values
Salute to this documentary - a well detailed, raw, slow paced, intrigue. Thank you so much for making this. ❤
Thanks for your positive feedback! 🙌
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She is an ultimate warrior. And how nice of her partner to be so supportive under such trying conditions.
I understand her rage deep in my bones. Girl, I see you. I stand with you.
I’m glad she have a strong and patient partner next to her! He understands what she went through and needs time, patience and love from him! Bravo to both of them! ❤
Li, if youre reading this, I'm so proud of you. You are strong and an inspiration to every woman who has had to go through this. I hope you have a long and happy life with your husband.
A mother who failed to protect her child deserves no respect.
It's okay to understand and accept her mother was also a victim but still be estranged from her. She was clearly hurting when with her mum and also hurting the mum in return. Sometimes it's better like that. Glad the dad got what he deserved what despicable
man. Such a brave woman, hope you keep healing from it.
Correct! Estrangement is inevitable. I’m glad she threw her dad to jail & not invite her mom to her wedding. A break from traditional patriarchal values. Well done the young Chinese couple
This young woman is so strong. She was the child, she was the victim. Her father violated her, and her mother knew and did nothing to protect her. She is pursuing justice for that little girl, and I can only respect her strength and bravery.
She is very strong girl. I feel sad for her but I admire her strength and courage after many years. Unfortunately sexual harassment is big problem in world including China and many women even don’t know what’s happening with them in work life and personal life. I feel so sad how a father can become such a monster. I hope in future she finds inner peace in her heart and live happy. This is a lesson for all women’s please don’t quite for those who abuse you or rape you or did anything to you. Rise your voice and let monsters in jails.
She is weak, vengeful, lashing out. She's become her father
@@sdalby9127I agree and I don’t find her strong at all but vengeful, angry, having anger outbursts,etc.. I am sure she is not an easy person to be around.
It is not just a female issue as males get abused too.
@@TrinhNguyen-sh4fj I suppose your interpretation of being strong is to do the opposite of what she did? Like form a loving relationship with her parents and take care of them for no reason other than the fact that they're her parents? If she did that, she'd have paved herself a fast track to self-destruction. Your lack of empathy is cancerous to humankind.
@@TrinhNguyen-sh4fjThat is why men should speak up and seek justice as well. Instead of keeping it inside in fear of being ridiculed or not believed. Keeping it a secret would only make it manifest and to cope they subject the same trauma to other people. In order to break the cycle of abuse we have to learn to break the cycle of silence.
Ms Li , we see your pain . We are with you . Please seek mental health help for your deep pain . Don’t spiral into depression . Stay strong !
Li is very lucky to have a kind and supporting man who supported her through the whole healing process. His genuine love taught her to trust and love again. It's so heart breaking to know that her very own mother who should be her first protector did not do anything when she told her about the abuse and assault. Li wants to build a new life and leave everything in the past even though the trauma will always be there. She wants her wedding to be the happiest day of her life and it makes sense that she didn't invite her mother.
Really raw and touching. Li is incredibly brave and strong, I'm glad she sought and got justice. Hope she will continue counselling to negate her ingrained anger. Bravo to her empathetic boyfriend and now husband; she was lucky to have his pillar of strength, respect and love throughout her journey, which I believe softens her heart to love. Eventhough the mum was wrong and neglectful not undertaking any remedial actions, I feel for her too; she doesn't appear to have support from anyone; maybe her actions - her best which is far far from enough - is all she is capable of. She probably had a tough childhood too. It's extremely hard for Li to forgive her; hopefully as Li gets older and have her own family, may she find room in her heart for forgiveness to her mum.
Lastly I hope this well presented documentary will inspire more abused victims to come forth and out their abusers.
It seems her boyfriend is very supportive of her, and understands her need for healing.
It’s awful how her abuser father always deflects the blame, doesn’t take responsibility or acknowledge her pain. I’m so sorry you had to go through this. You deserved a father who would have protected you and would go to the ends of the earth for you. It’s understandable that you were frustrated with your mom because she let the abuse happen to you. May justice be served!
Asian narcissistic father & enabler mother…😂 hope the old school values end with the children choosing to change
That so called man stole her innocence and stole her life, look at her suffering! May he be sent behind bars, 10 years is too short, he robbed her whole life.
Li, wishing you a joyous rest of your life with your husband, may you both love and encourage each other always!
@@blackchickadee1 no one can take or rob you if your life. She has control of her life now and should live it as such
He got 12.5 years opposed to the 7 that was initially given. I say life is better but I guess 12.5 is already a life sentence for that old creep.
First dialogue: They had a quite peaceful conversation. She was polite and respectful. He did not feel he did something wrong dismissin it with fate, got wrong parents...ladted only two secunds... When she said it was painful he ignored her. He did not even say sorry. This guy regrets nothing. Beautiful lady I hope she gets closure agter making this public ❤ thanks to friend for supporting her.
His response further confirms how sick he is
All her mother had to say is "You're right. I was a coward. I allowed you to suffer so that I didn't have to be uncomfortable. I'm sorry. I understand the damage we have caused will affect you for the rest of your life. I was supposed to protect you and I betrayed you. I love you. Please allow me to help make this right". That's it. It's the excuses and lack of accountability that is setting her off.
She needs professional help. I've met some abused people and they take their anger out on anyone, their husbands, their kids. I'm not saying it's their fault but they need help. Hopes she finds peace.
Therapy by bullying the weak like it’s the nature of the bees 😂 hope she doesn’t become either of her parents, years of self-bullying turns to her mom but hopefully she gets help & not spill it on her husband & kids. The generational trauma ends with her! Bravery for speaking up & taking actions
Sadly in some cases even professional help cannot do much as some are just lost causes.
unless we learn to let go of our ego and its pride, we will ceaselessly torture ourselves with past events. if you think about it, it's all about the "thought" of what others have done to us. the ego is the center of all this mischief. the past events is over and done with, yet the ego is full of vindictiveness and hurt. the physical trauma is long past, yet the psychological trauma is constantly being replayed by its ego. we need to detach ourselves from our ego and pride in order to heal.
@@whatever5575 This is not possible for pretty much everyone, because we are human beings. She is traumatised and it's not because of her ego and pride - that is very insulting, and blaming the victim. She has been extremely brave and is moving on really well - it takes time. When people have been abused you need to be understanding and compassionate - not spout unrealistic spiritual advice.
@@spicybiscuit88 it's not blaming the victim but exploring why we hold onto the trauma and let it affect us negatively for years. the physical trauma is long healed yet the psychological trauma is still being replayed in her brain, making her miserable for many years. the goal is to move beyond the psychological trauma and not let it affect us negatively. the mechanism of holding onto trauma is more or less the same with most of us human beings. it is the memory of it being replayed by the wounded ego. the ego with its pride and self-image is the root of many human conflicts and that is an undeniable fact.
This was similar to philippines case in raffy tulfo show. A girl who got raped by his father and got pregnant. The mother and her siblings didnt believe her, until the girl went to that show and asked for help. DNA testing was done and it was proven that the father was the dad of that daughters kid.
The girl was crying and telling her mom that "why you didnt believe me, i am your daughter but you chose to protect him. Have mercy on me mom..
The girl has every right to be mad.
Been married for more than40 years, never hit or touched my wife in aggressive manner, we just argue or I keep quiet about it.
Hope u are happy though
You want a medal?
We don’t applaud a bee for making honey.
@@paquitoignacio3449 This is what you're meant to do. It shouldn't be something to brag about.
@@paquitoignacio3449 Good man & husband! Thank u for doting on your wife :) 💖
@@johnp7999exactly I don’t know why people are so proud of “not hitting “ their spouses or treating them with respect,
This is what we are supposed to be doing!!!
As a girl I am so proud of you sister . We have to support each other ,we are not safe even in our homes now . Keep going sister you are my hero ,I support u thanks
Notice how she rocks back and forth on the bench as she talks with her dad in the park, she’s trying to self soothe because of how unwell she feels being near him talking about what happened
When she confronted her mum as an adult, it was so profound and amazing strength. Bless her for speaking out! The pain of breaking the silence. Thankyou for sharing your story. ♥️♥️♥️♥️♥️ so happy for her to conquer and say this was not her fault.
the immense courage this lady mustered to fight for herself. massive respect to her! thank you for showing the world victims don’t have to stay victims forever and abusers can be brought to justice
Unparalleled Courage for this Survivor.
I think most females especially when they were kids would have experienced sexual assault or wrong touching, but only realised the meaning after growing up.
To face her parents AGAIN, seeing their indifferent facial expressions and responses as to why they allowed the trauma to haunt her... This isn't easy.
As a father, I can't imagine. He deserves a lot worse than 12.5 years! I hope Li and her husband moves forwards and have an amazing life together!
She did the right thing by not inviting her mom to the wedding. If I was the mother, I would've punished the father myself even if it meant I went to jail for life. No mercy. Her mother is a disgraceful coward for doing nothing. An utter insult to good mothers around the world.
Her mom didn't have the strength to fight for her daughter. Not everyone in this world is strong. Glad she got justice. Now therapy can help her even more
@@NHJDT that's partly why the father did it. He knew that the mother was powerless and needed him financially.
He had that leverage. This is why women need to be independent.
This comment is such a bs 😂😂 you can report it to the police. Its simple as that. You dont need to be strong
@NHJDT its not strength, but basic goodness and decency that she didnt have.
This is an incredibly tragic story but one of undeniable courage. I mourn for the loss of family but I also applaud her immense bravery. Her speech is so clear and emphatic and her voice is hardly shaking given her pain. What must she have gone through to come to this closure. Justice is finally served but her childhood is gone and can never come back. Her father broke the family and her mother abetted him. I hope that her husband will treat her well and they will have beautiful children and live happily ever after. There should be no other ending to this story but happy ever after. Wishing you peace, joy, love and light, Li. Love from Singapore
It’s a scary world out here. Make sure you take care of your daughters sisters mothers aunties. God bless everyone be safe.
Just remember Li , it was NOT your fault and he cannot hurt you anymore. Huge Hugs!
When she talked to her mother, I was so proud of her. Not many of us are strong enough to stand up for ourselves to our parents. She set strict boundaries, very good.
Poor girl, I can’t imagine how painful it was to her confronting this monster for justice
Well done for confronting your abuser and enabler so powerfully,your pain,torment and suffering is felt by not only us viewers but especially your dear partner 💕
I pray in your recovery as you journey forward and hope one day you may find the strength to forgive to give yourself peace of mind and the ability to perhaps have a family of your own to love and cherish as you should've been.
Sending love and strength from a fellow survivor...Kia Kaha from NewZealand 🩷🤍🩷
She should not be in contact with her mom anymore. It’s too traumatic for her. Her mom is only thinking of herself. She’s brave to stand up for herself. Her parents owed her their life. They don’t deserve her. They should be locked up in jail. I am so sorry for what happened to you, girl. Hope you get the justice you long deserved for. 🙏
1. Thank you Al Jazeera for making this video.
2. Li, you are incredibly brave for having gone through this. As a survivor of several sexual assaults throughout my childhood and adulthood and now as a trauma therapist, I know the road to recovery is long but not impossible. I hope you will continue therapy.
3. There is no such thing as "I didnt know". Every mother or care-giver/guardian knows on some level when their child is being sexually abused. They just go into denial out of fear, their own shame, they too freeze and disassociate, like the victim.
May you and husband have a prosperous and happy life together. 🙏
She is very angry at her mome for failing her...hope she heals and forgive her one day...i cant stand a weak mother either
I just want to give you a hug. You are a brave young lady. Now you need to work on forgiving and accepting yourself
Not forgiving, forgetting yes
@@jennifer12366 forgiving, when we are victimized, we tend to blame ourselves. What did we do that caused someone to act this way towards us. It haunts us as victims, we relive this situation by playing it back in our minds, what if I did this instead of that, was it because I did this and not that. We relive the pattern of trauma over and over again. We have to forgive ourselves that this was an act upon us that was not deserved not our fault, we are victims. It’s not because we were to pretty, to thin, to weak, to happy, or because we were waiting for a bus to late at night, any one of us could become a victim of an assault/ sexual assault, it changes the way we behave, our thought process, our sense of trust, our life. Forgive yourself, give yourself grace, find therapy and ways to cope.
She may have been harsh but it was her mothers duty to protect her and she did not.
She has to be one of the strongest people I’ve ever seen. I wish all the best for her and her husband!
Oh I'm so proud of her and so happy to her flourish. She deserves all the happiness in the world!
She is so strong. These fathers that do this to their children are sick in the head. Do they think the children forget what they have done? Shameless.
This was so hard to watch 😢I was also molested as a child 😭 & I feel her pain especially when she's with her mother who was supposed to protect her!!!! 💔 This was really heartbreaking 😢 but I'm so proud 👏 of her to fight back & speak up against her abusers!!! God bless her & her fiancé 🙏 ❤️ ❤❤❤❤. May they live happily ever after.
😂😂
tell your story. Why did your dad abuse you ?
@@AbdalMalik-ye1dfno one should tell their story on the internet.
@@GroupKakiPancingPantaiwhat are u laughing at?
@@mal6989 tell your story. what did your father do to you ? 😅
Her husband is kind. But he should not be her sole support system. I really hope she gets professional help for her anger. Especially if she's going to have children. Her outbursts would be terrifying to a child.😢
I agree and my brother married a woman like that. They are not pleasant people to be around. I had an evil and abusive so called father so I know how it is. Luckily, I did not turn out bad.
@@LoloO42it seems that you have biased option of her, her anger came from years of traumatic experience without any support from her mom and lifelong negative influence from her as well, she didn't outburst toward anyone else, she'd give all her love to her baby cause that's what she long for
@@qiuxian9700I don’t agree as I have seen how crazy people can be and guess who they take it out on? Their innocent kids if they have any. It is better if she doesn’t have any.
@@TrinhNguyen-sh4fj There are certainly some people in this world deal with that kind of situation differently like you mentioned unfortunately but based on what i saw she hasn't got any anger issues, she showed nothing but gratitude toward anyone who helped her, she's longing for change for the better and she resented how she was treated as kid so much so that she would go a completely opposite way
@@TrinhNguyen-sh4fjVietnam has similar culture to China so the potent patriarchy impacts people…my dad molested me too. I walked out of the family & now getting therapy to help me manage my anger & mental health. Getting there, we chose our own fate! She needs professional therapy to help her navigate her own marriage & possibly motherhood. Cheers to her taking brave steps to put her rapist dad in jail & keep her mom out of her wedding. The next chapter of her life is up to her.
What a tough Woman she is. With all the trauma & pain she endured Li is so incredibly strong. If she found a level of peace and can move forward that's so deserving of her. What a beautiful Bride she was and to have her Husband right by her side through it all was everything...💖
My heart grieves for the pain, loneliness, and solation you have gone through since you were a child. You have been extremely brave in facing this trauma and confronting your parents. Many young women in similar circumstances will see this video and find the strength to do what you have done. I wish you a life of happiness with your husband. What a wonderful man to support with all of his heart. He is your teacher in showing you not all people are like your parents. I wish continued inner healing for you as well.
May God give her peace and strength to live a better life moving forward.
i feel so sorry for her💔 the baggage she's been carrying all these years. May she heal and move on to a peaceful and loving environment with her partner.
So much of this reminds me of my life... especially the way she talks to her mother. She's angry that the mother didn't do anything to protect her... The way she expresses herself clearly and yet doesn't get good responses from her mother. Christ... I empathize with her in so many ways... This happens more than people think. And it happens to people just walking around looking normal, carrying this insane weight for their entire lives... It's crippling.
That anger never goes away. The trauma is permanent, always fresh. Child abuse is no joke.
That was painful to watch. I'm a dentist. I returned to the US for grad school ( specialty residency) in 2002 and befriended a Vietnamese resident who had also been raped by her father years ago after they had moved to the US during the "boat people" period of the war there. It was all painful stuff
I’m so proud of this woman’s strength, courage and resilience to fight for justice. God bless her in every way.
Thanks aljazeera you are true news channel.❤
Thanks for the positive feedback. 🙌
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I was never sexually abused by my father, but I was physically abused by him for years, and not only did my mom never stop him, she also instigated it. I feel Li's anger to the core of my being.
She's a brave girl with courage and supports to get justice and face the accused. Wish her a happy life from now on. Hope other victims learn justice is available.
I am sharing this to all my friends who came from this sort of family, to give them the courage to speak up for themselves
So incredibly proud of her. The bravery she showed. I could only imagine how incredibly uncomfortable this was for her to relive the abuse.
She is extremely brave and smart with a strong warm heart.❤ her husband is such a supportive man.❤ I wish them all love and luck. I hope she continues to do whats best for her and she will heal❤❤❤
I am into more of this content! Well done, Al Jazeera.
Thanks for watching, dear Ryan.
i will never understand having 6 daughters myself how any father could do any harm to such precious innocents who have total trust and love for you, a delicate fragile flower, they are a blank sheet of paper, paint love, care, gentleness all things good, let them make mistakes and be gentle to them, love always wins
My mom let my grandpa and dad abuse us. I am so glad she confronted her mom. As a parent now, I think my mother was complicit and enabled the crime. She's just as guilty.