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don’t go on your phone first thing in the morning.. you will find you can move with a lot more grace and patience without the pile of information on a half asleep innocent lil brain!!
Main character syndrome definitely goes to my head a majority of the time, where I feel like I'm placed under a microscope. Except, as you said, no one even cares. No one's looking through that microscope at me, except for me. This was a great video!
Singing is good for you it activates the vagus nerve the second largest nerve in the body! Don't worry if you can't hold a tune; the tune will hold you!
Interesting, you know, I get Vaso-vagal syncope sometimes when I go for vaccines, partly cause I get nervous and maybe some other reasons. It was MUCH better this last time I got my vaccine, I asked them to let me sing out while they did it cause it relaxed me 😆 I sang “If I Could Turn Back Time” by Cher
I am very insecure about the way I look and its held me back so much. Although no one has gone out of their way to tell me I'm ugly or look weird or something, I still feel like they're thinking it. I have to remind myself hourly that I'm ok and like you said, no one cares!!
Well if one is ugly, perhaps no one really cares. I’m not pretty. But I once joined one male pageant... Just so I can say to myself that for once I really don’t give a F! It was liberating.
Lucy Allan Nothing is wrong with standards. We actually need them. The human soul needs beauty. We don’t need to wage a war on beauty simply because we think don’t have much of it in ourselves.
same, i’ve been told to get braces because of my crooked teeth and people have pointed out saying i have a big nose or small eyes in a weird way and i’ve always felt insecure but then when you think about it like you dont have to impress anyone or do what they want you to just to please them you know like they are gonna keep thinking about it but ain’t nothing gonna happen if i keep getting concerned over it lol so im learning to think that way
It’s my birthday, I didn’t remind anyone of it, and I’m surprised to see the people who wished me. Not the ones i prioritized. They fucking remembered. I should appreciate them more.
I really don't understand why someone would tell someone else they're the worst at something. I'm a singing teacher and I've had many students come into class traumatized by other people's words, maybe at 60yo, after spending a lifetime not doing what they've always wanted to do because they were told they're awful. It breaks my heart every time. But we get through it. And when they manage to stick to it, they realize they're getting better day after day and, most importantly, they're feeling better. Change is always possible!!
+chiaradigleria People need to make ad campaigns about singing on the Disney channel "Verb it's what we do, singing is a skill, you can do it, we all can sing."
The thing is, I hate feeling controlled or moved by other people’s opinions so much that I don’t even like compliments or positive input. I don’t want to be happy or dependant on what somebody else thinks or rewards me with, at all because I feel tied down by them. Not sure how healthy that is
That's how I feel aswell with the addition of feeling the need to downplay how excited I really am about things, in case those around me are unamused or find my reaction is inappropriate.
Machi Osone I relate to that, too. It’s frustrating feeling pressured to live up to whatever expectations somebody else has of us. Equally as frustrating feeling like we’re never good enough or don’t deserve attention and kindness from them.
This is exactly how I got over social anxiety. When I moved to collage, in a bigger town, some uni friends invited me into the club to a party, and I didn't go, because I thought that my dance moves were so bad that everyone will see that and make fun of me. I was getting angry because I stood at home alone, and my friends were having fun. I saw after a couple of days a quote that said "No one cares about you". It wasn't in a negative matter, but rather in a positive one, saying that nobody will judge or make fun of you, because everyone is more interested in themselves, rather than on other people. So the next time they invited me, I got to the club, and danced my ass off. And I really observed that absolutely no one was staring at me, no one cared how badly I danced, no one cared how I looked. This quote pretty much saved my social life, I had no problem staying in crowded places after, or being embarrassed if I make mistakes in speaking when I talk to other people. It pretty much made me a different person, in a good way.
Same as you, I also can't drive because I worry about how people look at me while driving, from now on I will learn to be more confident while telling myself that "I don't care what people think"
I love this,i really have a hard time forgiving myself,the mistakes that i did in the past(5-7 yrs ago and its the worst) it gives me anxiety And im just elementary back then,its hard to forgive myself.but im working on it
Since childhood, we have been told that we're special, then we start to attend school and for the majority, everything changes cause now being the best, flawless, be known for some skill or appearance becomes the new standard, compliments from our parents are no longer satisfying, in fact, perhaps those regards perceive us into believing that we're different from others. As I see things the spotlight effect might have something to do with this period of our lives, btw I need to read that book. Great video Lucy :) have a nice day everybody!
Exactly André, you don’t need to be exceptional! Also, the educational system believes in a fixed mindset that some kids are smart and others are not and I think it’s such a big issue as we have generations of children growing up not realising that knowledge can always be learned and that if they try hard enough, they can learn whatever they want! Have a great day to you too!
This couldnt have come at a better time, i missed out on so much of my teens and easrly 20s being more concerned with what others think ofme than how i actually feel
As kids we are dancing and singing on our own and then we get older and insecure. And self conscious sets in, but imagine if we brought that carefree attitude back? Singing is something I would do for free, I get the chills, it’s always been my first love. Music. I would sing as a child while writing my lyrics without even knowing what I was doing it felt like I was not in control of myself as if I were experiencing it but someone else held the pen, someone else sang the melody and I was simply a vessel for the creativity flowing out of me onto paper and my words disturbing the air.
I’ve literally been thinking about doing TH-cam since 2015... I’ve still never done it and it really frustrates me. What holds me back is the fact I feel it needs to be perfect first time and look professional in terms of video quality, audio and editing and I need to let go of that! I also worry about what people think of me but actually now I’ve reached 23 I feel like a care a lot less about what people think than I did at 20 and 100x less than I did at 17. This year I’m going to give it a shot and not give into the fear holding me back. 😊
Most of us have gone through this. I still go through this and have been making content for well over a year. In the beginning I found every excuse “when I look better” “when I have the equipment” “when the sun is out” “when the sound of my voice doesn’t annoy me anymore” - yes all of these things I have used as an excuse. The reality is there is never going to be a perfect time. I wish I would have started filming years ago when I first had the idea because I would be further along in my journey. I let so many self defeating thoughts hold me back in the beginning. Good luck and hope you try it this year!
THIS IS INSPIRING ME!! I used to be a youtuber in 2008-2013. I was in collab channels and stuff with some big youtuebers, and i got TWO separate hate comments about my content not being funny, AND I DELETED MY CHANNEL. 8000 SUBS WERE GONE :( I want to start again and i think i will now. :)
Definitely being more proud of my religious beliefs and telling people about it, definitely need to take the spotlight off me and focus on others and helping them
I just have to push back slightly on this one . . . your beliefs belong to you . . . you are of course free to share them with others . . . but do so with absolutely zero expectation that they will change their own beliefs to align with yours . . . good luck !
I've just found your TH-cam Channel and I want to tell you: Never stop doing these kind of videos. It's a relief that there are many people around the world doing their best as much as they can, i don't feel alone ♥
Do you want to do your best and cower and beg to get a sip of what you desire? Or would you rather become a horror, utterly abandon everything that makes you dependent on the whims of others?
Once I stopped caring so much about others, what they think etc. something interesting happened. People started being more curious about me, and I felt more free. I become more intune with myself because I didn't attach so much energy into caring for others
I've always wanted to create a TH-cam channel too, though I'm so scared of regretting it later. One thing that motivates me is believing that on that moment those decisions were the best, now I recognize that weren't, but back then it made me happy and I eventually grew up to dislike and it's okay. We're not born conscious and prepared to everything, this would end a beautiful process which builds our future and determine who we are. Mistakes are there to remember that success is near. Thanks for the video, inspired me a lot! ♡
Yep most people are way too concerned about themselves than they are about you. People have the same fears that others are thinking about them but we're too focused on our insecurities!! Thanks for the inspiring words Lucy.
I've never deeply thought about this, but after watching your video I realized that I used to care way too much about meaningless stuff from school until the end of university, in retrospect that constant pressure to never fail limited my actions and many times affected my happiness overall. Now, as an "adult" I do care and have my priorities but are not about what people think of me. Believe it or not, I'm happy 90% of my time, I do things I like, and most important I'm at peace with myself, tbh I do struggle a bit while parallel parking hahaha but thankfully, I unconsciously changed my mind as I grew up. I wish I knew this a long time ago, it's great that you took the time to make this video, you'll help a lot of people with this.
@@AshleyHernandez oml two beautiful queens supporting each other! and Ashley, I love your confidence! You got this gurl! Also, I subscribed! Sending u much much love, success, positive vibes, and blessings to yall's way
Everytime i watch a great TH-cam video i don’t just “like it” because i can like anything right. But i save it to a playlist. In case i need to rewatch it. This is definitely going on the playlist.
OMG I CANT BELIEVE YOU MENTIONED SINGING THAT IS MY MAIN THING. THE SERENDIPITY IS UNBELIEVABLE. AND IT IS “ if you want to do something and you’re passionate about it do it and learn “ you can sing we can all sing it’s a skill. We can learn to control our diaphragm, our vocal chords, the way our lips and mouth move to create an infinite amount of different sounds and if you can TALK YOU CAN SING.
+CULTOFCARISSA This is the motivation i needed, thank you. Now i will train for the X-Factor and learn how to sing...i knew it, intuition...you can sing we can all sing it’s a skill, if you can TALK YOU CAN SING.
I feel like it’s a blessing I been coming across positive channels like this lately you described perfectly what I been feeling lately and I’m glad more people are tapping in to this type of energy and realizing that the mind is such a powerful thing and you can manifest and loving themselves the way we should. Anxiety is hard to overcome but we are stronger than we think.❤️
Yes I am also shedding the skin of this anxiety you speak of. The anxiety of thinking about what other people are thinking of what I’m thinking they’re thinking about me. It is like EVERYTHING I do and have in my life was based off of that complicated, contradictory, thought process I just typed out.
i loved reading this book it helped me out in alot of areas but the area it helped me the most (which i am aware is different from this video) is to not care as much while working. A majority of my woking life was in coffee shops and fastfood which are fast paced positions, the last coffee shop i worked at i asked my co-worker how are you so fast, make it look effortless and are not exhausted, she told me she doesnt care as much. I did not get, i did not understand the mindset until i read this book. I am a custodian right now and i am changing my mindset to not care about the tasks ahead of me and how long it will take me to do them just focus at one task at a time and be in the mindset of do and get it done. It's not easy but i definitely want to make this happen. This book can help you out in your work life as well no matter what job you have.
I am going to keep going and stop paralyzing my goals, my life, who I am; my growth, my value, my purposes. I have multiple purposes. People will talk. They always have they will never stop. And that’s okay because I talk too and I don’t think I will stop talking until I am no longer part of this Earth. Also I typed out talking as you said talk 1 second later
I really feel like I needed this. Thanks for the deep message, I'm a teenager and every time I feel a spotlight on every bad step I take, the reality is that no one cares🙁 I shouldn't be held back by other people's opinions. You're cute :)
These thoughts makes me think about the idea of take on my own way of choice. It's just the simple question: 'What do I do with my freedom?' So cool this video, thanks for sharing interesting reflections.
I teared up when you spoke about being insecure when driving.. this is 100% me and I have never met anyone who feels the same way 😅 I feel like an awkward alien, because driving comes so naturally to most people.
I really like the video but I would counter that no one thinks about your past mistakes because people always like to bring things up, family, friends, whatever. The only way to avoid that is to literally be a hermit and never talk to anyone for more than a week. But you can definitely just change your attitude towards it like not actually caring what they think yourself or laughing along with it and at yourself and not taking yourself so seriously that a mistake, even a massive one, is fine and people will likely bring it up for a joke and it's not healthy to let that get to you or get mad about it because if they are your friends it's likely not actually in a toxic, targeted way designed to make you upset.
This is something I've struggled so much during the past few years. Actually it's so nice to hear that other people had this problem and it wasn't just me and how they managed to get over it. Thank you for making such video, you've earned another sub :)
It's a great book, indeed! It's funny how I took the same book with me on a flight to Portugal, and the guy who sat next to me was reading it too! Haha, for a minute I thought he grabbed it from my bag 😅
some months ago I discovered that classical men´s style is the way i like to dress, and initially I didn´t let me express myself. Luckely I took action and now I don´t care about others thoughts :)
Running on the beach- recently i went to the beach at night with family, and just ran around the beach waving my arms around without a care, and it is now a new favorite memory. It was so freeing:) idk if you will see this but I just found your channel and I am loving it so far❤️
@Heidi Tyack girl start your youtube channel. everyone feels like they sound awkward or annoyingon videos, but i can almost guarantee you that to others you sound perfectly fine. and if you don’t know how to edit, then dont. there are a lot of youtubers out there that don’t edit their videos and people still enjoy watching them (like trisha paytas, and sagittariusshawty for example.) do what makes you happy!
I know I am a few years late to this! I have been really really struggling with mental health and keeping friendships because of this. This really really really helped me get out of that slump.
Lucy, thank you so so so much for your videos! I'm going thru such a hard time and I was feeling like I was trying to seek attention to feel good about myself. When I realised that, I started trying my best to focus on my egocentric behaviour (on how to change it) and I was really trying to read books and watch videos about this only to find really narcissistic ppl behind those "spiritual awareness/ how to feel confident from within" sort of videos. Now watching the videos you uploaded I feel like they really helped me, like I was listening to a friend. Guess that was really what I was looking for: Someone who I could talk to (althought I am not talking, just listening) about these deep stuff like human personality traits and behaviours, especially on the internet, and I really resonated with your vibes - AND BTW you encouraged me to start a new minor private account on instagram so that I can still be connected with my friends and post the photos I take (cause for me it is really a hobbie) but not care so much for the public eyes. TYSM
I’m a language student at college and something that draws me back is that I’ve always loved England and the UK since I was 9 and started learning English as my second language and I love speaking with a British accent (although there are many, i know) but my classmates and teacher have this bad action of criticizing the people who speaks with it because they think it is fake and pretentious and we should all speak with an American accent. I feel insecure and pressured to not speak the way I want to and feel identify with. I feel ashamed and I desire to free myself and be the person I wanna be. Thanks for reading me 😊💙💙
I think that’s so weird that people want you to speak with an American accent when it was our language that they use? They’re the ones with the accent ahah, don’t worry about them just focus on yourself 🥰
i was writing out my notes whiles listening to this and after you said you were going to have a dance party, i wondered why you had gone silent. i looked up and saw you dancing lol. great video
Thank you for this. I'm glad I found your TH-cam Channel :) And it is true, no one cares if you almost fall while walking in your heels, no one cares if your shirt is full of coffee spots after going to a café and walking on the streets, etc. But we think people do! But no, everyone has their own life to mind about.
I am nearly 30 and I was hanging onto the hurt I caused someone at the age of 20, for 8 or 9 years. I found a contact for this person and emailed him a few months ago, because I'd decided I was ready to apologize. His respond included the words "to be honest, I think its weird you're emailing me after all this time." And I thought, you know what? It is weird. Its weird that I'm apologising for hurting his feelings almost 10 years later! Then I realised that it was me who needed to let go of my guilt and shame and that I didnt owe anyone an apology or have to make things right before i could let it go. People are responsible for themselves. It was ME who had to let go.
Love Mark Manson’s book. It really is a modern take on stoicism. I was the same with being worried about posting videos - but just going for it. Glad I found your channel!
Loved this book. This is how I feel and sometimes about Relationships. It’s crazy that we think so much yet really most people just don’t give a fuck. I’m definitely still learning to not be super anxious about people opinions. Finally made my first TH-cam video so that was a start.
I think i'm genuinely in love with your brain, but i guess it's not a so terrible disease. I'll live with it. Keep up the good work Lucy, you're smart and full of good vibes.
I've always wanted to make a daily vlog, and ended up making it and uploaded it last night. Turned out I edited it wrong and the quality is bad, I've been sharing to everyone and didnt get a lot of feedback so I thought maybe I should take it down and gave up vlogging.. then this video came up in my recommendations, I watched it til the end.. and yeah, who cares, I'm gonna continue 😄 thank you Lucy for the great video!
I always get held back by the thought of that ONE person on that ONE occasion who may notice you, whether that's positive or negative, I always consider that ONE of chance that I am seen.
Thank you. I actually went through/ am in a situation and this came to me at the right time. I wonder if this has a little Bhuddist philosophy, to think 🤔 of nothingness or I am nothing. The way I understood was when someone needs help with a problem that I don’t put any of my opinions or subjectiveness into solving the problem. Sometimes the best way is letting go if the problem doesn’t get better. Anyway just a thought. Your video helped me a lot. Many blessings to you!
this is so good! I love how real this is. I honestly think social media has a huge effect on how people become stuck in toxic productivity. Thanks for great content!
I tried to read this book last year but couldn't get past the first chapter. I hated it and I hated the way he worded things haha, it sounded so pessimistic to me. I loved your video though, you had such a gentle loving way of explaining the message! 💕
Hey everyone, thanks for all the support on this video! As a thanks, you can use my Shortfrom affiliate link to read and remember the best summaries of your favourite books.
Click this link to get a free 5 day trial (or just buy an annual subscription cause I am sure you're going to love it!) : shortform.com/lucy
There is no such thing as bad philosophy. If philosophy is bad, it is not philosophy. Cute video.
“no one cares about a mistake you made five years ago”
*TWITTER JOINS THE BATTLE*
😭😭😂😂😂!!!
that was an interesting thumbnail to see first thing after waking up lmaoo
Hahaahahahaah 😭😂
Same 😭😭
don’t go on your phone first thing in the morning.. you will find you can move with a lot more grace and patience without the pile of information on a half asleep innocent lil brain!!
HAHAHAHHA
Agreed
Main character syndrome definitely goes to my head a majority of the time, where I feel like I'm placed under a microscope. Except, as you said, no one even cares. No one's looking through that microscope at me, except for me. This was a great video!
Playing music walking down the street feels amazing, but there’s limits to everything haha!
agreed ! also i love your yt channel btw youre great
Singing is good for you it activates the vagus nerve the second largest nerve in the body! Don't worry if you can't hold a tune; the tune will hold you!
Yeah! Singing is great :D
Interesting, you know, I get Vaso-vagal syncope sometimes when I go for vaccines, partly cause I get nervous and maybe some other reasons. It was MUCH better this last time I got my vaccine, I asked them to let me sing out while they did it cause it relaxed me 😆 I sang “If I Could Turn Back Time” by Cher
The cause of fear= Attachment. The cure of fear= Detachment. Hope this helps someone
"Attachment leads to jealousy. The shadow of greed, that is. Train yourself to let go of everything you fear to lose." - Yoda.
+Duaa Star Wars fans unite, may the force be with all of us.
Isn't being alive a form of attachment to the self?
“The stoical scheme of supplying our wants by lopping off our desires, is like cutting off our feet when we want shoes.“ ~ Jonathan Swift
Ok, I'll just detach from physics real quick.
I am very insecure about the way I look and its held me back so much. Although no one has gone out of their way to tell me I'm ugly or look weird or something, I still feel like they're thinking it. I have to remind myself hourly that I'm ok and like you said, no one cares!!
They're probably sitting thinking the same thing about themselves, not you! Beauty is all about stupid standards any way !
Well if one is ugly, perhaps no one really cares. I’m not pretty. But I once joined one male pageant... Just so I can say to myself that for once I really don’t give a F! It was liberating.
Lucy Allan Nothing is wrong with standards. We actually need them. The human soul needs beauty. We don’t need to wage a war on beauty simply because we think don’t have much of it in ourselves.
@Easy Go that is probably 100% true!
same, i’ve been told to get braces because of my crooked teeth and people have pointed out saying i have a big nose or small eyes in a weird way and i’ve always felt insecure but then when you think about it like you dont have to impress anyone or do what they want you to just to please them you know like they are gonna keep thinking about it but ain’t nothing gonna happen if i keep getting concerned over it lol so im learning to think that way
It’s my birthday, I didn’t remind anyone of it, and I’m surprised to see the people who wished me. Not the ones i prioritized. They fucking remembered. I should appreciate them more.
hehe :)
Whenever I tell my aunt that life is hard and stressful, she tells me that we make it hard and stressful. And oh boy how right she is
100%!!
That gave me the push to drop the summer course.
I really don't understand why someone would tell someone else they're the worst at something. I'm a singing teacher and I've had many students come into class traumatized by other people's words, maybe at 60yo, after spending a lifetime not doing what they've always wanted to do because they were told they're awful. It breaks my heart every time. But we get through it. And when they manage to stick to it, they realize they're getting better day after day and, most importantly, they're feeling better. Change is always possible!!
+chiaradigleria People need to make ad campaigns about singing on the Disney channel "Verb it's what we do, singing is a skill, you can do it, we all can sing."
So true. Self judgement held me back throughout my adolescence and my twenties... I'm so happy I progressively to finally just be me :)
Lovely video!
Amazing to hear Carlo! "Don't take criticism from someone you would not take advice from "
@@LucyAlllan Word!
The thing is, I hate feeling controlled or moved by other people’s opinions so much that I don’t even like compliments or positive input. I don’t want to be happy or dependant on what somebody else thinks or rewards me with, at all because I feel tied down by them. Not sure how healthy that is
That's how I feel aswell with the addition of feeling the need to downplay how excited I really am about things, in case those around me are unamused or find my reaction is inappropriate.
Machi Osone I relate to that, too. It’s frustrating feeling pressured to live up to whatever expectations somebody else has of us. Equally as frustrating feeling like we’re never good enough or don’t deserve attention and kindness from them.
U might be suffering from codependency If it's really bad.
Reverie 613 is it codependency if I desperately try to be independent and avoid people?
Yip
This is exactly how I got over social anxiety. When I moved to collage, in a bigger town, some uni friends invited me into the club to a party, and I didn't go, because I thought that my dance moves were so bad that everyone will see that and make fun of me. I was getting angry because I stood at home alone, and my friends were having fun. I saw after a couple of days a quote that said "No one cares about you". It wasn't in a negative matter, but rather in a positive one, saying that nobody will judge or make fun of you, because everyone is more interested in themselves, rather than on other people. So the next time they invited me, I got to the club, and danced my ass off. And I really observed that absolutely no one was staring at me, no one cared how badly I danced, no one cared how I looked. This quote pretty much saved my social life, I had no problem staying in crowded places after, or being embarrassed if I make mistakes in speaking when I talk to other people. It pretty much made me a different person, in a good way.
Same as you, I also can't drive because I worry about how people look at me while driving, from now on I will learn to be more confident while telling myself that "I don't care what people think"
I love this,i really have a hard time forgiving myself,the mistakes that i did in the past(5-7 yrs ago and its the worst) it gives me anxiety And im just elementary back then,its hard to forgive myself.but im working on it
Let's go Luna! I am with you on this - you can be proud of yourself just for working on it :) Keep moving forward !
Since childhood, we have been told that we're special, then we start to attend school and for the majority, everything changes cause now being the best, flawless, be known for some skill or appearance becomes the new standard, compliments from our parents are no longer satisfying, in fact, perhaps those regards perceive us into believing that we're different from others. As I see things the spotlight effect might have something to do with this period of our lives, btw I need to read that book. Great video Lucy :) have a nice day everybody!
Exactly André, you don’t need to be exceptional! Also, the educational system believes in a fixed mindset that some kids are smart and others are not and I think it’s such a big issue as we have generations of children growing up not realising that knowledge can always be learned and that if they try hard enough, they can learn whatever they want! Have a great day to you too!
Oh and also, you need to read it. It’s a good pick-me-up and very funny too!
This couldnt have come at a better time, i missed out on so much of my teens and easrly 20s being more concerned with what others think ofme than how i actually feel
happy to hear you understand 😅
We all need a little reminder like this - Philosophy is great :)
Marc Aurèle est le mec ....
@@LucyAlllan Please don't do that :'(
As kids we are dancing and singing on our own and then we get older and insecure. And self conscious sets in, but imagine if we brought that carefree attitude back? Singing is something I would do for free, I get the chills, it’s always been my first love. Music. I would sing as a child while writing my lyrics without even knowing what I was doing it felt like I was not in control of myself as if I were experiencing it but someone else held the pen, someone else sang the melody and I was simply a vessel for the creativity flowing out of me onto paper and my words disturbing the air.
Yes!!!
Life is great when you live in the moment
I’ve literally been thinking about doing TH-cam since 2015... I’ve still never done it and it really frustrates me. What holds me back is the fact I feel it needs to be perfect first time and look professional in terms of video quality, audio and editing and I need to let go of that! I also worry about what people think of me but actually now I’ve reached 23 I feel like a care a lot less about what people think than I did at 20 and 100x less than I did at 17. This year I’m going to give it a shot and not give into the fear holding me back. 😊
You got this Lilly!!!
i relate to this so much!!!
yess you can do it 1!!1
Most of us have gone through this. I still go through this and have been making content for well over a year. In the beginning I found every excuse “when I look better” “when I have the equipment” “when the sun is out” “when the sound of my voice doesn’t annoy me anymore” - yes all of these things I have used as an excuse. The reality is there is never going to be a perfect time. I wish I would have started filming years ago when I first had the idea because I would be further along in my journey. I let so many self defeating thoughts hold me back in the beginning. Good luck and hope you try it this year!
THIS IS INSPIRING ME!! I used to be a youtuber in 2008-2013. I was in collab channels and stuff with some big youtuebers, and i got TWO separate hate comments about my content not being funny, AND I DELETED MY CHANNEL. 8000 SUBS WERE GONE :( I want to start again and i think i will now. :)
Definitely being more proud of my religious beliefs and telling people about it, definitely need to take the spotlight off me and focus on others and helping them
Im glad to hear that, you should never hide your beliefs no matter who you are in front of! I hope you have a great day Seasmus! :)
I just have to push back slightly on this one . . . your beliefs belong to you . . . you are of course free to share them with others . . . but do so with absolutely zero expectation that they will change their own beliefs to align with yours . . . good luck !
@@------6ampoems did a religious person push their beliefs onto you?
@@------6ampoems YES YES YES!!! FUCKING YESSS!!!
Ehhhh, I get freedom of religion, but most are extremely homophobic and misogynistic, and I don't respect that at all.
I started caring about what I can do to make the world a better place that I completely forgot about any insecurities or the haters that I have.
I've just found your TH-cam Channel and I want to tell you: Never stop doing these kind of videos. It's a relief that there are many people around the world doing their best as much as they can, i don't feel alone ♥
Wow, thank you Ana for the kind words❤️❤️❤️
Do you want to do your best and cower and beg to get a sip of what you desire? Or would you rather become a horror, utterly abandon everything that makes you dependent on the whims of others?
Once I stopped caring so much about others, what they think etc. something interesting happened. People started being more curious about me, and I felt more free. I become more intune with myself because I didn't attach so much energy into caring for others
I feel like most people suffer from believing they don’t matter while we’re led to believe others do.
I've always wanted to create a TH-cam channel too, though I'm so scared of regretting it later. One thing that motivates me is believing that on that moment those decisions were the best, now I recognize that weren't, but back then it made me happy and I eventually grew up to dislike and it's okay. We're not born conscious and prepared to everything, this would end a beautiful process which builds our future and determine who we are. Mistakes are there to remember that success is near.
Thanks for the video, inspired me a lot! ♡
Letting go, surrendering your fears and worry is the key to a free life!
Well said!
Yep most people are way too concerned about themselves than they are about you. People have the same fears that others are thinking about them but we're too focused on our insecurities!! Thanks for the inspiring words Lucy.
I've never deeply thought about this, but after watching your video I realized that I used to care way too much about meaningless stuff from school until the end of university, in retrospect that constant pressure to never fail limited my actions and many times affected my happiness overall.
Now, as an "adult" I do care and have my priorities but are not about what people think of me. Believe it or not, I'm happy 90% of my time, I do things I like, and most important I'm at peace with myself, tbh I do struggle a bit while parallel parking hahaha but thankfully, I unconsciously changed my mind as I grew up.
I wish I knew this a long time ago, it's great that you took the time to make this video, you'll help a lot of people with this.
I was the same way when it came to starting youtube. I was so scared of judgment but with the help of books I DO NOT CARE. best decision ever
Whohoooo! Superbe Ashley, let's keep going :D
@@LucyAlllan can’t stop won’t stop!! WE got this
@@AshleyHernandez oml two beautiful queens supporting each other! and Ashley, I love your confidence! You got this gurl! Also, I subscribed! Sending u much much love, success, positive vibes, and blessings to yall's way
@@foodismykryptonite8571 you are so wonderfully kind wow! I appreciate you dearly!!
Everytime i watch a great TH-cam video i don’t just “like it” because i can like anything right. But i save it to a playlist. In case i need to rewatch it. This is definitely going on the playlist.
The same goes with Taoism. We are thinking-machines that tend to overthink topics to a point of no return.
Dont ever blame yourself, go forward, your smile is precious😊
Yeaaaaaaaah!
OMG I CANT BELIEVE YOU MENTIONED SINGING THAT IS MY MAIN THING. THE SERENDIPITY IS UNBELIEVABLE. AND IT IS “ if you want to do something and you’re passionate about it do it and learn “ you can sing we can all sing it’s a skill. We can learn to control our diaphragm, our vocal chords, the way our lips and mouth move to create an infinite amount of different sounds and if you can TALK YOU CAN SING.
Yes!!! Singing doesn’t have to be for X factor, it can be for fun too😇
+CULTOFCARISSA This is the motivation i needed, thank you. Now i will train for the X-Factor and learn how to sing...i knew it, intuition...you can sing we can all sing it’s a skill, if you can TALK YOU CAN SING.
I feel like it’s a blessing I been coming across positive channels like this lately you described perfectly what I been feeling lately and I’m glad more people are tapping in to this type of energy and realizing that the mind is such a powerful thing and you can manifest and loving themselves the way we should. Anxiety is hard to overcome but we are stronger than we think.❤️
I am so glad! Let's go!!
I think the bravest is the most authentic to oneself.
100%
I can't describe the peace this video gave me.
Ah haaha that’s crazy! Thank you
Yes I am also shedding the skin of this anxiety you speak of. The anxiety of thinking about what other people are thinking of what I’m thinking they’re thinking about me. It is like EVERYTHING I do and have in my life was based off of that complicated, contradictory, thought process I just typed out.
i loved reading this book it helped me out in alot of areas but the area it helped me the most (which i am aware is different from this video) is to not care as much while working. A majority of my woking life was in coffee shops and fastfood which are fast paced positions, the last coffee shop i worked at i asked my co-worker how are you so fast, make it look effortless and are not exhausted, she told me she doesnt care as much. I did not get, i did not understand the mindset until i read this book. I am a custodian right now and i am changing my mindset to not care about the tasks ahead of me and how long it will take me to do them just focus at one task at a time and be in the mindset of do and get it done. It's not easy but i definitely want to make this happen. This book can help you out in your work life as well no matter what job you have.
Hey Melissa, what’s the book called?😇
Hey Melissa, what’s the book called?😇
@@LucyAlllan the one talked about in the video by mark manson
Your video helped me so much with my social anxiety
I am going to keep going and stop paralyzing my goals, my life, who I am; my growth, my value, my purposes. I have multiple purposes. People will talk. They always have they will never stop. And that’s okay because I talk too and I don’t think I will stop talking until I am no longer part of this Earth. Also I typed out talking as you said talk 1 second later
I wish you the best of luck🥰
Nothing says you give an F more than reading a book about not giving an F.
You're talking so calmly.. It's so soothing ❤️
Glad you enjoyed hehe :)
such calmness in your voice, gave me serenity!
haha thank you so much!!
1.) No one cares ab u as much as u do urself
2.) Mistakes happen
3.) If its not harming anyone and u have the best intent, who cares?
So well said!
I really feel like I needed this. Thanks for the deep message, I'm a teenager and every time I feel a spotlight on every bad step I take, the reality is that no one cares🙁 I shouldn't be held back by other people's opinions. You're cute :)
These thoughts makes me think about the idea of take on my own way of choice. It's just the simple question: 'What do I do with my freedom?'
So cool this video, thanks for sharing interesting reflections.
Well said!
Love yourself and DONT do it for others but do it for yourself.
STAY HEALTHY and HAPPY
Whohoooo!
I've FINALLY passed my driver exam and when I've seen this video I haven't yet. So I guess this video has helped my in a certain way :D
congratulations :)
@@LucyAlllan thanks!
I teared up when you spoke about being insecure when driving.. this is 100% me and I have never met anyone who feels the same way 😅 I feel like an awkward alien, because driving comes so naturally to most people.
Whohooo we aren't alone haha!
We need more people like you in this cruel world❤️
I really like the video but I would counter that no one thinks about your past mistakes because people always like to bring things up, family, friends, whatever. The only way to avoid that is to literally be a hermit and never talk to anyone for more than a week. But you can definitely just change your attitude towards it like not actually caring what they think yourself or laughing along with it and at yourself and not taking yourself so seriously that a mistake, even a massive one, is fine and people will likely bring it up for a joke and it's not healthy to let that get to you or get mad about it because if they are your friends it's likely not actually in a toxic, targeted way designed to make you upset.
This is freeing !
I have anxiety, and everytime i am outside i feel that people look and judge me. But, no f one care s!!!
This is something I've struggled so much during the past few years. Actually it's so nice to hear that other people had this problem and it wasn't just me and how they managed to get over it. Thank you for making such video, you've earned another sub :)
thank you so much !!
This 7 min. video just gave me the realization and new perspective that I'd bring for the rest of my life. Thank you for this ♡
Thank you for commenting your nice words!!
That little dance at the end is so cute. You're absolutely adorable. And such a soothing voice :)
Thank you🥰
It's a great book, indeed! It's funny how I took the same book with me on a flight to Portugal, and the guy who sat next to me was reading it too! Haha, for a minute I thought he grabbed it from my bag 😅
So cool!
As a teenager,your videos are very relatable and helpful.Keep making these videos!I love your channel.
Thank you! Will do!
Whats the one thing you’ve always put off because you’re worried about others?
some months ago I discovered that classical men´s style is the way i like to dress, and initially I didn´t let me express myself. Luckely I took action and now I don´t care about others thoughts :)
@@leopoldalbarracin-castaney1120 Wow that's incredible, suit it up Leopold! If anything, the others will be jealous that they don't have your style :)
@@LucyAlllan thank you so much lucy!!!!
Running on the beach- recently i went to the beach at night with family, and just ran around the beach waving my arms around without a care, and it is now a new favorite memory. It was so freeing:) idk if you will see this but I just found your channel and I am loving it so far❤️
@Heidi Tyack girl start your youtube channel. everyone feels like they sound awkward or annoyingon videos, but i can almost guarantee you that to others you sound perfectly fine. and if you don’t know how to edit, then dont. there are a lot of youtubers out there that don’t edit their videos and people still enjoy watching them (like trisha paytas, and sagittariusshawty for example.) do what makes you happy!
this video literally cured my depression lmao
I know I am a few years late to this! I have been really really struggling with mental health and keeping friendships because of this. This really really really helped me get out of that slump.
One thing that makes it harder to stop caring so much is if there really been situations where people around us have judged us or got annoyed at us.
I agree :)
I haven't gone to sleep yet, loved the book by the way.
Lucy, thank you so so so much for your videos! I'm going thru such a hard time and I was feeling like I was trying to seek attention to feel good about myself. When I realised that, I started trying my best to focus on my egocentric behaviour (on how to change it) and I was really trying to read books and watch videos about this only to find really narcissistic ppl behind those "spiritual awareness/ how to feel confident from within" sort of videos. Now watching the videos you uploaded I feel like they really helped me, like I was listening to a friend. Guess that was really what I was looking for: Someone who I could talk to (althought I am not talking, just listening) about these deep stuff like human personality traits and behaviours, especially on the internet, and I really resonated with your vibes - AND BTW you encouraged me to start a new minor private account on instagram so that I can still be connected with my friends and post the photos I take (cause for me it is really a hobbie) but not care so much for the public eyes. TYSM
Wowww Gabriela! This comment made my day🥺 thank you so much! You got this, and I really hope you can get over the rough time soon!!
Also, your English is great!! I’m a language student at university so I know the struggle, but you have nothing to worry about !
I’m a language student at college and something that draws me back is that I’ve always loved England and the UK since I was 9 and started learning English as my second language and I love speaking with a British accent (although there are many, i know) but my classmates and teacher have this bad action of criticizing the people who speaks with it because they think it is fake and pretentious and we should all speak with an American accent. I feel insecure and pressured to not speak the way I want to and feel identify with. I feel ashamed and I desire to free myself and be the person I wanna be. Thanks for reading me 😊💙💙
Embrace who you are. If you enjoy your accent, keep it 💙
@@LucyAlllan oh thank you so much 💙
I think that’s so weird that people want you to speak with an American accent when it was our language that they use? They’re the ones with the accent ahah, don’t worry about them just focus on yourself 🥰
the same book you mentioned I read during the trip from London-Toronto, it is a great book indeed, so much to grasp. Great video Lucy :)
Such a good read, good choice reading during a flight too! Thank you Banshan :)
I felt that when you talked about the driving. I also am anxious when I drive.
it is a tough life when you are scared of cars hahah
Better than not being anxious enough. I'm afraid of driving, because I'm not afraid of driving.
Your accent is so cute 😭😭
Just stumbled across your channel and I realised that your videos are exactly what i need! You inspire me. THANK YOU.
I'm so glad!
Your voice. So soothing i can listen to you for hours. You’re so adorable.
Thank you😅
Relaxing voice 😌
Glad you think so!
I really needed to hear that!!
Love your voice it's really soothing and calm
Ahh thank you so much😇
It was actually nice and simple , lovely...
whoho
i was writing out my notes whiles listening to this and after you said you were going to have a dance party, i wondered why you had gone silent. i looked up and saw you dancing lol. great video
I just realized my latest video was about this exact same topic. This was like the biggest revelation in my life.
I've read the Subtle art of not giving a F*ck, great book a total game changer. Also great video! It hit my recommended and I'm glad I clicked.
Thank you for this. I'm glad I found your TH-cam Channel :) And it is true, no one cares if you almost fall while walking in your heels, no one cares if your shirt is full of coffee spots after going to a café and walking on the streets, etc. But we think people do! But no, everyone has their own life to mind about.
So true!
thank u for reminding me that i do not matter !! ♡ (in a good way)
I stinkin love your channel. Just keep talking, I love it.
That means so much to me🥺 thank you so much!!!
I am nearly 30 and I was hanging onto the hurt I caused someone at the age of 20, for 8 or 9 years. I found a contact for this person and emailed him a few months ago, because I'd decided I was ready to apologize.
His respond included the words "to be honest, I think its weird you're emailing me after all this time." And I thought, you know what? It is weird. Its weird that I'm apologising for hurting his feelings almost 10 years later! Then I realised that it was me who needed to let go of my guilt and shame and that I didnt owe anyone an apology or have to make things right before i could let it go. People are responsible for themselves. It was ME who had to let go.
Yeah ...I am astonished why I am listening to you now ,bcz I needed it 1-2 years ago when I needed to be one who should not care ....
Never too late :)
@@LucyAlllan ❤️❤️
Mark Manson has improved my life so much
glad i have found your channel Lucy! 🦋♥️
I am so glad that you are here Betul :)
Your voice is so soothing. I can listen to you for all day. Good content ☺️
😊 thank you
Love Mark Manson’s book. It really is a modern take on stoicism. I was the same with being worried about posting videos - but just going for it. Glad I found your channel!
oh nice, another stoic! Welcome aboard :)
Loved this book. This is how I feel and sometimes about Relationships. It’s crazy that we think so much yet really most people just don’t give a fuck. I’m definitely still learning to not be super anxious about people opinions. Finally made my first TH-cam video so that was a start.
it's a journey but we will both get there. Good luck with TH-cam :)
I think i'm genuinely in love with your brain, but i guess it's not a so terrible disease. I'll live with it. Keep up the good work Lucy, you're smart and full of good vibes.
Love your drive for true self-development!!
Self-development without the self-deprecation 😉 Thank you so much Thora
I've always wanted to make a daily vlog, and ended up making it and uploaded it last night. Turned out I edited it wrong and the quality is bad, I've been sharing to everyone and didnt get a lot of feedback so I thought maybe I should take it down and gave up vlogging.. then this video came up in my recommendations, I watched it til the end.. and yeah, who cares, I'm gonna continue 😄 thank you Lucy for the great video!
You can do it! Let's goooooo Salma!
I love your energy. Very peaceful. I know about the book, I didn’t read it but I k is about it. The idea brought me a lot of peace as well. 😊
Glad you enjoyed Maryam!
I always get held back by the thought of that ONE person on that ONE occasion who may notice you, whether that's positive or negative, I always consider that ONE of chance that I am seen.
Loved your video. Thank you
Glad you enjoyed it!
This is a good channel to hear thoughts from a young woman. Glad it popped up on my YT suggestion. Great words of wisdom!
Thank you so much, have the best day🥰
I need to read that book. I appreciate your transparency. New subbie here ❤️
It's so good! I hope you will find it useful :D
@@LucyAlllan I’ve been hearing about it for a long time & has been procrastinating to get it lol
I can dig it. Thanks for the book recommendation!
Any time!
Thank you. I actually went through/ am in a situation and this came to me at the right time. I wonder if this has a little Bhuddist philosophy, to think 🤔 of nothingness or I am nothing. The way I understood was when someone needs help with a problem that I don’t put any of my opinions or subjectiveness into solving the problem. Sometimes the best way is letting go if the problem doesn’t get better. Anyway just a thought. Your video helped me a lot. Many blessings to you!
❤️
Needed this reminder. Thank you!
Glad it was helpful!
this is so good! I love how real this is. I honestly think social media has a huge effect on how people become stuck in toxic productivity. Thanks for great content!
I tried to read this book last year but couldn't get past the first chapter. I hated it and I hated the way he worded things haha, it sounded so pessimistic to me. I loved your video though, you had such a gentle loving way of explaining the message! 💕