The power of reclaiming your name | Ilknur Eren | TEDxBayonne

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 22 ส.ค. 2022
  • The name Ílknur is very common in Turkey, but not so common in the United States. In this talk, Ílknur takes us through the beautiful story behind her first name and explains why she ultimately stopped “Americanizing” herself.
    Ilknur is a software engineer and a DACA recipient who is passionate about advocating for immigration rights and people with disabilities and believes that personal stories can shape the world to a better place. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at www.ted.com/tedx

ความคิดเห็น • 99

  • @darshanashetty3467
    @darshanashetty3467 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    I have never been abroad but I thought if ever any English speaking person would be unable to pronounce my Sanskrit origin name I would introduce myself as Dash which are first two letters of my first and last name. But one of my friend living in Nashville introduced me to his American friend via video call but surprisingly,he was able to pronounce my name very well also greeted me with joined hands and a namaste. Jaw dropping experience totally.

    • @yannickbaroue
      @yannickbaroue ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Darshana looks easy to pronounce. Pronouncing the three a as the a in 'cat' word and rolling a bit the r.
      Maybe I'm wrong but it looks really easy

    • @taw2377
      @taw2377 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@yannickbaroue it’s more like dar-shon-uh I’m pretty sure. Source: had a friend named Darshan. The a like cat sound isn’t really as common in Sanskrit languages, and they don’t really roll their r’s much either

    • @sibapadhy3278
      @sibapadhy3278 ปีที่แล้ว

      It's totally well framed word mam 😊

    • @yannickbaroue
      @yannickbaroue ปีที่แล้ว

      @@taw2377 Good to know. Thank for the explonation.
      I speak a few latin languages which makes me more comfortable with a sound.
      I have been to India twice.
      A lot of people are rolling the r in India, not like the latin people. That's why I was guessing like that.
      My mistake.
      Thank you for the explonation

  • @cynthiacastrorodriguez8276
    @cynthiacastrorodriguez8276 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Absolutely beautiful Ilknur. So upset you never told me your real name at work, but now I know it, and I think it's absolutely beautiful and unique! Just like you!! The meaning is beautiful and total is you First liked and I recall liking you when I first met you just like most of everyone at Ovation! BRAVO Ilknur! Bravo!

  • @irenemcnamara9699
    @irenemcnamara9699 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Your experience might be helpful to my daughter. She hates her name, Irene. I have explained to her that it is only because she lives in America. It is considered very beautiful in many countries, meaning peace. I will tell her about your video.

  • @noomwa
    @noomwa ปีที่แล้ว +21

    Soooo true! For years, in my preteens, I adopted an American name -- Katie -- for years because I was frustrated with having to explain and repeat my birth name. Americans of all color, size, and creed still chopped up Katie. Lol. I finally reclaimed my birth name in my early 20s. It was empowering and like a weight had been lifted.

    • @hannesRSA
      @hannesRSA ปีที่แล้ว

      How is it empowering? Doesn't seem like it should matter. Guess it depends, if you don't really like your own name and the hassle of correcting people, you can choose a new name without carrying a weight.

    • @altitudeiseverything3163
      @altitudeiseverything3163 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      As an immigrant to the US as a shy child, I would cringe when I had to constantly correct people when they garbled my name. I didn’t like the extra attention when I was trying so hard to blend in, so I just let people pronounce it in the incorrect, nails-on-a-blackboard way that *they* ‘felt comfortable with.’ That was a mistake. Everyone has a right to *their* name, and it isn’t asking too much for people to take a couple moments to learn how to pronounce it. It’s simply common courtesy. When I began college, I was more assertive about people calling me by my correct name. I repeated it until they got it right. It’s a lovely name with a proud and interesting history; I shouldn’t have to change it in any way for the convenience and comfort of others. *It’s my name.* And, yes… reclaiming it was very empowering! Glad you found your voice! ❤️

    • @altitudeiseverything3163
      @altitudeiseverything3163 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@hannesRSA She never said that she disliked her name, but that it was uncomfortable having to constantly correct people. And yes… one’s name matters very much and it *is* empowering to own it, with pride, for all the history that comes with it. Immigrants shouldn’t have to give up everything unique about themselves in order to find their place in a new country.

    • @hannesRSA
      @hannesRSA ปีที่แล้ว

      @@altitudeiseverything3163 that's an opinion. Some personalities value culture and heritage, some think it's rubbish and that's also a valid stance. Still don't understand "empowering".. maybe it also only makes sense to some personalities.
      I have a Dutch derived name and first language... I find no use for it, don't see the point in having pride in Dutch ancestry when they don't recognize me as such etc.

    • @altitudeiseverything3163
      @altitudeiseverything3163 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@hannesRSA Yes, people are different. That’s the point actually. *You* are in no position to judge someone else’s life experience or feelings about it. It may not “matter” to you, but it does to them. So… it matters. No one is under any obligation to try to get you to understand why this is empowering. Again, it obviously *is* to the speaker, the commenter here, to me, and to a number of others here.

  • @SupremeEyeQQ
    @SupremeEyeQQ ปีที่แล้ว +1

    This is awesome Ilknur! Your progression is amazing.

  • @carissalintao2232
    @carissalintao2232 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    Love this - such a timely message that the world needs to hear.

  • @rubin-healmysocialanxiety702
    @rubin-healmysocialanxiety702 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Very inspiring thanks for sharing your story! ❤

  • @yannickbaroue
    @yannickbaroue ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I lived 3 years in England and people could not pronounce my surname Baroué.
    I explained a million times it's pronounced Bar way but it was like nobody listened 😆
    Finally I accepted Bay roo pronounciation instead of Bar way.
    Some countries with a huge majority of monolingual people can struggle with foreign names.

    • @Nyny.1000
      @Nyny.1000 ปีที่แล้ว

      In England it’s also a mental struggle for people who don’t want to learn a foreign name and want to make a point about how foreign names are hard.

  • @lena421
    @lena421 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I tried that when I first moved to Germany. Germanized my name to make it easier for people to pronounce it. It was weird to try to respond to a name that wasn't mine and people sometimes would even get offended when I didn't realise they were speaking to me. Could only do it for about 8 months before I realized it was not the best move. I then had to ask everyone to call me by my actual name. I've been here for 4 years now and some people still refuse to call me by my actual name, but that's their issue.

  • @leilanybarletta6509
    @leilanybarletta6509 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I live in Uruguay and I have a hawaian name. As a kid I hated it, I've been all my live struggling with it and unrespecful people loughs. Now I am called Lei or Leila, only my boss calls me Leilany. Thank you for sharing your story!

  • @nicosmarcou679
    @nicosmarcou679 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    Amazing and inspiring talk - well done. Very thought-provoking and powerful. One of my fave talks.

  • @JoeL-is5ts
    @JoeL-is5ts ปีที่แล้ว

    My little sister, I am so proud of you. Love you 😘

  • @doriangraya
    @doriangraya ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I’m pregnant and I’m Italian, my little boy will be called Luca which is short and easy to pronunce, it’s also very Italian and religious name. What is important is teaching him to be proud of his roots, identity, culture, wherever he will go.

  • @rainjaytvvlog
    @rainjaytvvlog ปีที่แล้ว

    Short but powerful; I will call it "the hidden limiting belief".

  • @heyunlong9382
    @heyunlong9382 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    My family name is He, and now people like to call me Mr He(English pronunciation),instead of my former English name Charles or Andy which are unsuitable to my face, culture and character etc. Sometimes, i thought maybe providing an English name is out of the convenience for English native speakers to call us. But maybe they are more curious on our real name and culture. Well, if they don't care about yours, then why you insist having such a name.

    • @hannesRSA
      @hannesRSA ปีที่แล้ว

      My wife has Chinese and Catholic names which she never uses.. not sure what they're for. Because she doesn't speak Chinese and everyone calls her by the name adopted in Indonesia - Chinese names were not allowed to be registered.

  • @miky8788
    @miky8788 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    .. was a great great channel ..

  • @thebiblioholic
    @thebiblioholic ปีที่แล้ว

    Congrats on reclaiming/reasserting your name! I noticed your pronunciation of it (specifically the second syllable, nur) sounded a little soft/Americanized.

  • @szabosandor8783
    @szabosandor8783 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    I am reclaimer of my NAAAAME!!!!

    • @daniellukonga3074
      @daniellukonga3074 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Born in Flames!!
      I have been blessed!!!

    • @szabosandor8783
      @szabosandor8783 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      ​@@daniellukonga3074 My family crest is a demon of death!!

    • @giampix36
      @giampix36 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      YES, JESUS CHRIST THE ONLY THING I WANTED TO READ, LOVE YOU!

  • @user-ln3so1gw1v
    @user-ln3so1gw1v ปีที่แล้ว

    Why the TED App search doesn't work? It always gives me "No result" ..!!!

  • @ailsaphinoir5130
    @ailsaphinoir5130 ปีที่แล้ว

    I have quite a lot of people outside of my native country (Scotland) finding it hard to pronounce my name, and instead often call me "Elsa".

  • @Chanoey333
    @Chanoey333 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    The message of this talk is important, but it really should have been condensed down to a couple of minutes or so

  • @VWatchie
    @VWatchie ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I am probably missing something here, but I don’t really care what people call me (as long as it isn’t something derogatory) as long as I know they’re meaning me. Anyway, I’m still very careful to call people what they want to be called. So, my name is Håkan (an ancient Viking name) but I always introduce myself as Carl in English speaking countries to make it a bit easier for my fellow human beings. Personally I don’t mind one bit.

    • @ZPositive
      @ZPositive ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I totally agree. You see things rationally and in proper perspective. This talk is about an illegal immigrant claiming victimhood. Never mind the opportunities our culture, society, and way of life have offered her, and never mind the dismal future she escaped. This is all about her feelings, and whiny pedantic fixation on something as trivial as how she's addressed.

    • @VWatchie
      @VWatchie ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@ZPositive well said and I think you’re absolutely right about that.

  • @anushreepatil5116
    @anushreepatil5116 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Beutiful name and a beutiful message .... Don't hinde your culture!

  • @stanlawfitness827
    @stanlawfitness827 ปีที่แล้ว

    Awesome Ilknur !! Thank you for your inspiration.

  • @daviddevlogger
    @daviddevlogger ปีที่แล้ว +1

    You can't give up now, it's just a season. Whatever you are going through. No matter how hard it is... It will pass. Better days are coming ahead ❤️

  • @nduxmaryam
    @nduxmaryam ปีที่แล้ว

    As long as I can pronounce my name nothing else matters. Other People can always learn to pronounce it.

  • @YY-ug9mv
    @YY-ug9mv ปีที่แล้ว +2

    MY NAMEEEEE İS GYOBU MASATAKA ONİWAAAAAA!

  • @arjunv2117
    @arjunv2117 ปีที่แล้ว

    Ilknur

  • @stayhappylittlemermaid
    @stayhappylittlemermaid ปีที่แล้ว +3

    For everything you have missed, you have gained something else, and for everything you gain, you lose something else.

  • @user-yp4nm3os8f
    @user-yp4nm3os8f ปีที่แล้ว

    🍀🙂🍀

  • @hawa7984
    @hawa7984 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I’m not sure how Ilknur is hard to pronounce, but I imagine it’s not the easiest to remember, or spell correctly. I wish everyone went by their real names, and wonder if immigrants know how many of us prefer unique names (at least to us) over something common… that being said, even though growing up my name was always mispronounced, misspelt & often forgotten, peoples response always was positive, often telling me they loved the uniqueness of it. Now that society seems quite used to “Janae”, I sometimes miss the confusion, simply because I never wanted a common name.

  • @yyaaqqoouubb
    @yyaaqqoouubb ปีที่แล้ว +1

    ❤❤❤

  • @ashfaqkhan3440
    @ashfaqkhan3440 ปีที่แล้ว

    My name Ashfaq was funny name for Australians

    • @ZPositive
      @ZPositive ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Do you go by Ash?

    • @ashfaqkhan3440
      @ashfaqkhan3440 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@ZPositive no Sir, I ask Aussie to call me Khan.

  • @cherylcallahan5402
    @cherylcallahan5402 ปีที่แล้ว

    *Ted x Talks Bayonne Darka LLknur Eren appreciate your videos Listening 🌟 from Mass USA TYVM 💙*

  • @saifislam7227
    @saifislam7227 ปีที่แล้ว

    noor in Arabic light soft light

  • @ceylan193
    @ceylan193 ปีที่แล้ว

    Nice talk

  • @karamellkamels
    @karamellkamels ปีที่แล้ว +1

    The reason for her appearance is just that everyone knows her name now.😂good marketing

  • @prakashdvrma37
    @prakashdvrma37 ปีที่แล้ว

    Wow

  • @purposedpatience6597
    @purposedpatience6597 ปีที่แล้ว

    😍😍😍😍

  • @mutmut0255
    @mutmut0255 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    edevletten isim değiştirmek artık mümkün. bugünlerde bu konuşuluyor. bi sn. o da ne?. hay allah! tedx amerikada yaşayan Türk ilknur'u gittiği ülkede yaşadığı zorlukları anlatsın diye konuşmaya çıkarmış. isminden dolayı sıkıntı çekmiş. "americanizing" demiş. ne tesadüf yahu.

  • @TheVigilante2000
    @TheVigilante2000 ปีที่แล้ว

    While in Turkey names may not relate to foreign races or ethnicities; nor may they be offensive or ridiculous. If the US had the same laws as Turkey , she would be arrested and forced to change her name into something non-foreign.

    • @MrCvjalexander
      @MrCvjalexander ปีที่แล้ว

      What’s your point? She is speaking about her experience here in the US. Why does it matter what happens in Turkey?

  • @xparqcxsmx3512
    @xparqcxsmx3512 ปีที่แล้ว

    Tatakae

  • @innovativefacultytrainingp1546
    @innovativefacultytrainingp1546 ปีที่แล้ว

    gr8

  • @faijulaman7937
    @faijulaman7937 ปีที่แล้ว

    ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

  • @MissButterflyLeo
    @MissButterflyLeo ปีที่แล้ว +1

    How can you say you’re reclaiming your identity/ name when you are actually pronouncing it wrong?

  • @ruatsangawhite7261
    @ruatsangawhite7261 ปีที่แล้ว

    ereehhh

  • @awesomehs6049
    @awesomehs6049 ปีที่แล้ว

    OMG make ur mind up jeez

  • @kevinwilliams3272
    @kevinwilliams3272 8 หลายเดือนก่อน

    You spent too much time complicating things, Ilknur. Apart from your name being your identity, as you ended up realising, you have 2 lovely names in Ilknur and Eren. Personally I like Turkish female names - e.g. Zeynep and Sebnem - which resonate with me because I'm a great fan of Turkish pop songs (well, mostly the female artists). Honestly, Lara doesn't suit you at all. And if I had been one of your customers and you had introduced yourself to me as Lara, with your perfect Turkish physique, I would have looked you in the eye and shaken my head so that you would know I didn't believe you. You're a very beautiful and elegant (lovely dress and low stilettos, mmmmm) young woman, in fact everything a woman should be. And I say "long life and happiness" to Ilknur Eren, but I have nothing to say to Lara. ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

  • @ivanhoegalahad
    @ivanhoegalahad ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Es freut mich, dass wenige Prozent der Menschheit sich darüber den Kopf zerbrechen dürfen. Die überwiegende Mehrheit kann froh sein, überhaupt je nach ihrem Namen gerufen zu werden. Wenn Prinzessinnen ihre Erbsen beschreiben.....😔

  • @ar.Shayan
    @ar.Shayan ปีที่แล้ว

    Ok, but its none of our business
    What i can learn from your this speech?

  • @Hamzah-dhillon
    @Hamzah-dhillon ปีที่แล้ว +1

    1st viewer 😍

    • @AB-yb3oe
      @AB-yb3oe ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Take your medel 🥇
      😅

  • @jeffbezozss
    @jeffbezozss ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Merhaba it's Arabic word

  • @terkan1980
    @terkan1980 ปีที่แล้ว

    But your name is not ILKNAR turkish people are not pronunce like that . ILKNUR the real one and she is stil embarissing her native personality and she is trying for amercanize her real name she is contradicting herself

  • @afnanahmed8288
    @afnanahmed8288 ปีที่แล้ว

    She looks like Elon Musk
    and that made me click on this video

  • @MATMAP
    @MATMAP ปีที่แล้ว

    Jaeger?

    • @thestargazer6335
      @thestargazer6335 ปีที่แล้ว

      Ohhh! Even i was gonna comment the same!

  • @nobrubgp
    @nobrubgp ปีที่แล้ว

    Lost of time.

  • @luffyyyy658
    @luffyyyy658 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    This sister look like elon musk

    • @tonycheung596
      @tonycheung596 ปีที่แล้ว

      That drives me to click on the link

  • @irenemcnamara9699
    @irenemcnamara9699 ปีที่แล้ว

    Your name sounds exotic. It sounds like a women from an alien planet.

  • @beingkushalraj
    @beingkushalraj ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Why I Felt like she is female elon musk🚶

  • @TheHaloTr
    @TheHaloTr ปีที่แล้ว +2

    A whole lot of talk for such a minor inconvenience.

    • @farukbulut5319
      @farukbulut5319 ปีที่แล้ว

      Waste of time...

    • @criscosta1129
      @criscosta1129 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Maybe "minor" for you, from your perspective. Not for her, not for me and a lot of people.

  • @farukbulut5319
    @farukbulut5319 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    It's something like waste of time to listen this Tedtalk. But beyand it, the message is important, just keep being yourself. And give easy-pronounced names to your new burn babies.

  • @tin2009tin
    @tin2009tin ปีที่แล้ว

    Such a waste of time....

  • @ZPositive
    @ZPositive ปีที่แล้ว

    My grandparents immigrated to the USA in the 50s. Legally. They were always ashamed of their native names and their accents. They wanted desperately to blend in. So much that they changed their first names so they'd be more American.
    That's how this melting pot used to work. Not some whiny gen-Zer complaining about her name. But these were rugged people who loved America, and wanted to be Americans. This annoying victim is offensive to me.

    • @ZPositive
      @ZPositive ปีที่แล้ว

      @navtown wanting to integrate into society, wanting to speak perfect English, wanting your kids to speak perfect English, and recognizing the prosperity that this country brings you are all healthy things. They are the spirit that made this country great. I do not see those traits in recent immigrants. Especially immigrants here illegally. If you refuse to follow our laws, refuse to integrate into our society and culture (yes, changing your name is often part of this), and refuse to recognize our culture, you slowly destroy this country.

    • @MrCvjalexander
      @MrCvjalexander ปีที่แล้ว

      Why should any person have to anglicize their name or give up every part of their culture. If we use the idea of the melting pot, it would seem that this country should absorb these variation not tamp them out.

  • @ZPositive
    @ZPositive ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Don't force American culture to change for you. Force yourself to change for American culture. It's a tiny price to pay for all the opportunity for prosperity we offer.

    • @immigrationcanada1802
      @immigrationcanada1802 ปีที่แล้ว

      America exists because of immigrants, otherwise it was a barren continent

    • @ZPositive
      @ZPositive ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@immigrationcanada1802 yes, absolutely. I do not dispute that for one second. But we were populated by immigrants who appreciated this new culture and society, and wanted to be a part of the melting pot. Getting angry because the locals mispronounce your name is not being a part of the melting pot. It's being an ungrateful, pedantic child.

    • @ZPositive
      @ZPositive ปีที่แล้ว

      @@jennil7797 my grandparents immigrated here in the 50s. Legally, unlike this complainer. And my grandparents gladly changed their names in order to fit in. That's the American spirit. Forcing others to bend to you is not the American spirit. That's just selfish victimhood.

  • @Greg-gi7je
    @Greg-gi7je ปีที่แล้ว +1

    This might be the most unsatisfying, silly and self absorbed Ted talk.
    This is the type of girl who will go for coffee and spend 10 minutes talking about stones and birth signs. The only reason she wouldn’t go for hours is because anyone with self respect for their own time would walk out by the 11th minute.
    Nobody who is serious really cares where you are from or what your name is. It’s much better to work on perfecting a craft or service and stop worrying about how you fit it. It’s narcissistic and boring. Worry about how your labour increases others quality of life.

    • @LuciddreamZ1
      @LuciddreamZ1 ปีที่แล้ว

      This should be the most ridiculous and ruthless comment i have seen in my life. It must have been a waste of time writing this comment for you. I wish you to spend your time on more meaningful things instead of writing bad comments to people. RESPECT Please.