This is remarkable. It fits for me. Even in a most serious way. Two days ago I felt I was dying and I was giving up. Then a friend called round, just for few minutes, and I felt good after. I had energy. I was well and pain free. So there was a critic telling me it was hopeless, I had no chance, and a part who believed this. It is a “really hard place to be in”. I need to identify what’s my pattern, though I think it comes up when I feel pain and don’t know what to do. As a child I didn’t trust doctors or dentists. I didn’t trust adults at all. Yet I didn’t know the answers either. Unblending is the key.😊
Great video! And this hopeless part might as well be a depressed part because of how much hopeless it has been! Thank you! I am going to tell all my friends about your amazing channel! My therapist charges £75 and she hasn’t explained any of this to me. She is my second IFS therapist and my 8th therapist! You Rock!❤
🤣 That cover image made me giggle. It's SO on point. Lol Definitely giving this a try! 🙏🏻🤗💞Thank you for shining your light freely and truly, upon so many weary paths.
I’m in therapy now and this is my 2nd session of IFS therapy for childhood trauma. I’m struggling to “tap into” or get into this as I don’t think of anything and my therapist says my inner child is being protected and suppressed still. I have chronic bloating and digestive cramps for the past 10 years now. I really want this to work but a part of me is scared to let go and find out what I’m holding on too x
We always say in IFS to go as slow as the slowest part. You have the awareness to notice these different parts which is a great start. Notice if there may be a part that wants to get things "done" faster and see if you can connect with them, hear their story, and offer some relaxation.
That will be another part, that is scared of finding out what you’re holding on to. It’s scared this thing will be taken away from you and because it’s saved you for so long you won’t any longer be saved. Does that connect for you? Does it resonate with you? The scared part is fiercely trying to protect you from any further harm. Bless it. It just doesn’t know yet, there’s another way. An even better way. Releasing the pain while that protective part is still there, still helping the whole system. In a new way.
Unblending in I.F.S. sounds a lot like de-fusing in Action and Commitment Therapy. The difference? In A.C.T. one is encouraged to determine whether thoughts are helpful or not. In I.F.S. the focus is on how one can respectfully determine what is helpful. Accurate or inaccurate? Thank you.
One of the principles of IFS is see all our parts are doing their best to take care of the system based on their specific stored experience. In practicing IFS we want to acknowledge the effort of our parts and offer them more insight and particularly an opportunity to relax. Most often, simply by validating our parts, they can better integrate and serve the system without us needing to tell them "this thing you do is helpful, but this thing you do is not helpful". Although, for some parts, this may be very useful for them if communicated gently and compassionately, and, they are open and willing to receive that sort of feedback. So in a way, yes, I can see that distinction however, I wouldn't be overly focused on approaching parts with the idea that one will determine their helpful vs non-helpful qualities. Rather, simply approaching our parts to acknowledge them, better understand them, and make offerings to help them relax. Through this process they can naturally orient to more "helpful" roles. Thanks for asking. All the best, Conor
my thing i have no theory of mind inside my mind feels like a mind soup some ppl i can never get outta my head i am for ever engaged and fantasizing and i don't even know as who or about what really so please decipher me am i too crazy for isf ?
You are not crazy at all. It sounds like you have a very active part that is trying to take care of you. This part is probably pretty tired of running the show and could use some relaxation. Using IFS protocols to offer some relaxation to that part, may be enough to start the ball rolling. If you need any help with this, just let me know. Much love to you
Great stuff! It kills my soul that counseling is too expensive for most people knowing almost "ALL" of us need it to varying extents.
Ifs is the best way to self care Good Job.
This is remarkable. It fits for me. Even in a most serious way. Two days ago I felt I was dying and I was giving up. Then a friend called round, just for few minutes, and I felt good after. I had energy. I was well and pain free. So there was a critic telling me it was hopeless, I had no chance, and a part who believed this. It is a “really hard place to be in”. I need to identify what’s my pattern, though I think it comes up when I feel pain and don’t know what to do. As a child I didn’t trust doctors or dentists. I didn’t trust adults at all. Yet I didn’t know the answers either.
Unblending is the key.😊
Great video! And this hopeless part might as well be a depressed part because of how much hopeless it has been! Thank you! I am going to tell all my friends about your amazing channel!
My therapist charges £75 and she hasn’t explained any of this to me. She is my second IFS therapist and my 8th therapist! You Rock!❤
I hear other people talk about their inner critic and I think that I am on good terms with my inner critic.
That's not what he says
🤣 That cover image made me giggle. It's SO on point. Lol
Definitely giving this a try! 🙏🏻🤗💞Thank you for shining your light freely and truly, upon so many weary paths.
You are so welcome! Happy the cover made you giggle ;)
Thank you
Very nice video, simple, short, and uplifting!
i learned so much in his video alone!
Good job! Great illustration, and I found it very helpful. Thank you.
I’m in therapy now and this is my 2nd session of IFS therapy for childhood trauma. I’m struggling to “tap into” or get into this as I don’t think of anything and my therapist says my inner child is being protected and suppressed still. I have chronic bloating and digestive cramps for the past 10 years now. I really want this to work but a part of me is scared to let go and find out what I’m holding on too x
We always say in IFS to go as slow as the slowest part. You have the awareness to notice these different parts which is a great start. Notice if there may be a part that wants to get things "done" faster and see if you can connect with them, hear their story, and offer some relaxation.
That will be another part, that is scared of finding out what you’re holding on to. It’s scared this thing will be taken away from you and because it’s saved you for so long you won’t any longer be saved. Does that connect for you? Does it resonate with you? The scared part is fiercely trying to protect you from any further harm. Bless it. It just doesn’t know yet, there’s another way. An even better way. Releasing the pain while that protective part is still there, still helping the whole system. In a new way.
So deep
Sound is rough in empty room
Good topic though
Thanks
Unblending in I.F.S. sounds a lot like de-fusing in Action and Commitment Therapy. The difference? In A.C.T. one is encouraged to determine whether thoughts are helpful or not. In I.F.S. the focus is on how one can respectfully determine what is helpful. Accurate or inaccurate? Thank you.
One of the principles of IFS is see all our parts are doing their best to take care of the system based on their specific stored experience. In practicing IFS we want to acknowledge the effort of our parts and offer them more insight and particularly an opportunity to relax. Most often, simply by validating our parts, they can better integrate and serve the system without us needing to tell them "this thing you do is helpful, but this thing you do is not helpful". Although, for some parts, this may be very useful for them if communicated gently and compassionately, and, they are open and willing to receive that sort of feedback.
So in a way, yes, I can see that distinction however, I wouldn't be overly focused on approaching parts with the idea that one will determine their helpful vs non-helpful qualities. Rather, simply approaching our parts to acknowledge them, better understand them, and make offerings to help them relax. Through this process they can naturally orient to more "helpful" roles.
Thanks for asking.
All the best,
Conor
Please please buy some mic - hard to listen to a harsh sound ... plese 🙏
All my new videos have upgraded equipment :)
my thing i have no theory of mind inside my mind feels like a mind soup some ppl i can never get outta my head i am for ever engaged and fantasizing and i don't even know as who or about what really so please decipher me am i too crazy for isf ?
You are not crazy at all. It sounds like you have a very active part that is trying to take care of you. This part is probably pretty tired of running the show and could use some relaxation. Using IFS protocols to offer some relaxation to that part, may be enough to start the ball rolling. If you need any help with this, just let me know. Much love to you