What a funny coincidence to stumble upon this video's title. A couple of weeks back I started a discussion amongst friends about vanity and it's varying levels, to contrast why I don't have tattoos and don't want to, while some of my friends do and have. My argument was that to alter one's base image requires a certain level of vanity, be it wearing accessories to getting tattoos. I said that getting a tattoo on your arm is akin to wearing a watch you can never take off, and we went from there. They were surprised to the fact that the didn't think there's vanity in getting tattoos, and some even got offended, thinking I was calling them vain and superficial, though I was clear in saying, it's just my own personal preference, if I don't feel comfortable using rings, most certainly a tattoo wouldn't do me any good either.
This is really interesting to read! I think your experience reflects well how vanity as a concept is 1) not wholly agreed on in terms of definition (is it simply an interest in image and image preservation - or is it about excessive preoccupation? Or is evident proeccupation with looks socially frowned upon to the extent that this preoccupation is deemed inherently excessive?); and 2) vanity has negative connotations, and any association with it can feel like a judgment on character; when, in fact, it is external social pressures and values that have conditioned people to be preoccupied with image - and such a preoccupation is even logical, to an extent, within a society that tends to treat attractive people better. Thank you for the thought-provoking comment!
@@ganymedia For one it's expected that individuals have a modest sense of vanity in order to live in society, like a well groomed appearance, clothes, in a way, even hygiene fits this criteria when talking about taking care of your image and how you interact with others. In the end I believe it all boils down to choices, some choices are easier than others, like wearing clothes, but depending how far you'd go to alter your image, for example buying expansive clothes. Vanity then would become more apparent and so give a clear chance for people to judge you.
This is so thought-provoking! Specially within the context of identity. I have tattoos, but not to show off. I have them in places no one will ever see (and not even for intimacy reasons... I'll get there). I have them because they remind me of everything that forges who I am. So for me, tattoos indeed have to be deeply significant, not only because they look cool. I have them hidden, yes, because they're for me, but because of another deeply depressing thing that has to do with the matters of this amazing writing of Rosalind: it's because of body-shaming. Tattoos where for me an exercise of self-esteem, self-value and even to have a little bit of vanity that I could appreciate within myself, but I'm never going to show them because... I don't even show my arms; I'm always wearing some kind of jacket over my tshirts even if there's the hottest climate. I've been body-shamed all my life: things like "I'm not muscular enough" or I don't "look strong enough" or I look like Gollum (which not, but muscular people and other kinds people have told me this in 1 o 2 intentions - both quite twisted: to bully me or to motivate me to make more exercise) or even people I care squeezing my arms after a hug (like a sign of affection) and making me feel uncomfortable. I always fought with the idea of having "normal" arms. And thought I know there's nothing wrong about my body (I'm healthy and bursting of life), I'm still struggling with the idea of finding no rest in a physical-centered world. I'll never be enough in the physical way... but for who? I'm still working on this. This is my existential crisis.
What a funny coincidence to stumble upon this video's title. A couple of weeks back I started a discussion amongst friends about vanity and it's varying levels, to contrast why I don't have tattoos and don't want to, while some of my friends do and have. My argument was that to alter one's base image requires a certain level of vanity, be it wearing accessories to getting tattoos. I said that getting a tattoo on your arm is akin to wearing a watch you can never take off, and we went from there. They were surprised to the fact that the didn't think there's vanity in getting tattoos, and some even got offended, thinking I was calling them vain and superficial, though I was clear in saying, it's just my own personal preference, if I don't feel comfortable using rings, most certainly a tattoo wouldn't do me any good either.
This is really interesting to read! I think your experience reflects well how vanity as a concept is 1) not wholly agreed on in terms of definition (is it simply an interest in image and image preservation - or is it about excessive preoccupation? Or is evident proeccupation with looks socially frowned upon to the extent that this preoccupation is deemed inherently excessive?); and 2) vanity has negative connotations, and any association with it can feel like a judgment on character; when, in fact, it is external social pressures and values that have conditioned people to be preoccupied with image - and such a preoccupation is even logical, to an extent, within a society that tends to treat attractive people better.
Thank you for the thought-provoking comment!
@@ganymedia For one it's expected that individuals have a modest sense of vanity in order to live in society, like a well groomed appearance, clothes, in a way, even hygiene fits this criteria when talking about taking care of your image and how you interact with others. In the end I believe it all boils down to choices, some choices are easier than others, like wearing clothes, but depending how far you'd go to alter your image, for example buying expansive clothes. Vanity then would become more apparent and so give a clear chance for people to judge you.
This is so thought-provoking! Specially within the context of identity. I have tattoos, but not to show off. I have them in places no one will ever see (and not even for intimacy reasons... I'll get there). I have them because they remind me of everything that forges who I am. So for me, tattoos indeed have to be deeply significant, not only because they look cool. I have them hidden, yes, because they're for me, but because of another deeply depressing thing that has to do with the matters of this amazing writing of Rosalind: it's because of body-shaming. Tattoos where for me an exercise of self-esteem, self-value and even to have a little bit of vanity that I could appreciate within myself, but I'm never going to show them because... I don't even show my arms; I'm always wearing some kind of jacket over my tshirts even if there's the hottest climate. I've been body-shamed all my life: things like "I'm not muscular enough" or I don't "look strong enough" or I look like Gollum (which not, but muscular people and other kinds people have told me this in 1 o 2 intentions - both quite twisted: to bully me or to motivate me to make more exercise) or even people I care squeezing my arms after a hug (like a sign of affection) and making me feel uncomfortable. I always fought with the idea of having "normal" arms. And thought I know there's nothing wrong about my body (I'm healthy and bursting of life), I'm still struggling with the idea of finding no rest in a physical-centered world. I'll never be enough in the physical way... but for who? I'm still working on this. This is my existential crisis.