it is a good start, but it is still all about you. I prefer "I know I am awesome, but what about you?" it reminds me that I am perfectly validated by myself and to be more curious about them. it is not about trying to be liked, it is about finding out if they are worth liking.
Here are some tips from us: - Compliment others genuinely and often, - Ask more questions about others than you make statements about yourself, - Assume everyone has something to teach you, - Present an open body language, - Do not try to impress
PR, VERY sound advice. May I add a corollary? Be kind. Be polite. Be courteous. And be respectful. Begin with these. If 'they' step over the line, at the very least you'll know you've made your best effort, and do take heart in that, while realizing even your best effort might still fail. I swear, with these and what PR mentions above, you should do pretty damned well.
@@michelrussell2014 I disagree. Building the things above into your behavior takes effort, forces you to NOT just 'be yourself'' but take others into consideration, and for the most part produces far better results.
I have one problem, i love jumping hanging running just anywhere and people think I'm showing off when I do its sad because I love doing it im not trying to show off sooooo
The simple take away message for me, "be your authentic self, and wear it like a badge". His authentic self allows him to take up space, sets the precedent and draws people into his world, where hes the main character, and we all come for the ride (stories)
Key points 1:20 Take 5 seconds to greet each person in the new social group 2:42 Don't try to blend in 3:15 Become a magnetic storyteller. Reminds me of Jordan P: Your value increases or decreases depending on how you convey ideas to others. 3:36 Cool Moment to show Louis from Ant Man! Love him! 3:45 Preframe story: say here is a funny story! This hooks people in. Then u begin telling your story. People are wired to love emotional journeys 5:58 Character method = play out your characters. Tell stories with your hands at the same time.
Fake it til its without thought, and it will become uniquely you. Musicians, comedians, etc tend to mimic, until they become comfortable and their own voice, sound, style develops.
What you mean to say is that no one is charismatic like this guy, we all have our own brand of charisma and the point is to use his example to bring out your own.
It's like martial arts pal. It's a technique, a trick, until you've practiced long enough that it became you. This whole "be yourself you're perfect" culture is weak, fake, and really starting to get old
Love the advice to determine the mood you want to set for an interaction and spend the first 10-20 seconds bringing that energy. Thanks for this video!
📜Here's the summary: Determine the vibe you want to project (e.g. slow, relaxed, carefree), and embody it for the first 10-20 seconds of contact with the audience Acknowledge people who don't seem important. Touch. Stay true to yourself instead of mirroring/blending in: if you want to lounge in your seat, do so even if all others are upright. Take up more space than you need. Learn how to tell good stories: * use a preframe hook, e.g. "Here's another funny story. It's true." * don't just tell the facts, convey the emotions you felt. People love emotional journeys. * act out the character. Even a change in cadence will be enough to convey another character. You don't have to be a professional actor. * (!) tell the story in the present tense; it's more immersive
You guys are one of the only people whose online courses are legit. I would recommend them to anyone who isn't comfortable around people. A 5 star review from here.
How to be confident like M. M.: 1) be born really good looking. 2) have a deeper than average voice 3) grow up somewhere you’ll pick up a disarmingly pleasant accent. 4) use the above to make a lot of money 5) now you too can make the world’s strangest car commercial and still get women and more acting gigs!
@Charisma on Command thanks for the video! Your channel focuses on boosting one's own charisma, but have you ever done a video on supporting or enhancing someone else's? Being a good "wing man," for example, or subtly encouraging someone who's feeling anxious (i.e. encouraging them without giving them a lecture on what they're doing wrong). Or even if it's someone who is already charismatic, how to play off them in a way that keeps the energy going without trying to one-up them. Basically, how to use your own charisma to make someone _else_ seem more charismatic. I'd love to see tips on that!
Literally every charisma video out there: Sit up straight, shoulders back open body language, be the dominant one in the room. Matthew McConaughey: Slouch back far enough in your lounge to a point where no one can see you but you can drink your glass of water from the floor.
I do a lot of these things and many times I end up getting talked over while Im telling a story, people miss my jokes, when I try to sit back and relax it looks like I gained 25 pounds of belly fat, if I do the low mathew type relaxed chill voice I just get completely ignored. Its easier not to get ignored or interrupted when you are a movie star and have the mic on stage.
I think just imitating all these without feeling comfortable in own skin wouldn’t work, without confidence you’ll come off as fake! Confidence+humbleness goes a long way!
@@-.__Hazel__.- You are right. Its easy to tell when someone is not being themselves. What this doesnt point out is that many people interrupt no matter how good a story is or how good its being told.
@@eleven8948 Did you ever consider that you're just not being captivating enough to keep people's attention? When you're nervous, it's easy to spill all the beans at once without any mystery or anticipation.
Certainly! McConaughey's charisma feels laid-back but intentional, and these habits can be powerful tools. Moving slowly and staying anchored? Those make a massive difference in how others perceive you. Greeting everyone and making yourself comfortable are easy but impactful actions that build rapport. And his storytelling style? Sharing emotions and acting out characters really hooks people in! Kind of like how in the Sense of Humor Improvement Program, small techniques can make a big difference in connecting with others.
To me, this video is more about how to be the Cool Guy in any setting, but isn't really transferable for women. People will criticize women draping themselves over couches, taking up extra space, talking too slow, & possibly even going up to each person. When it's about a neutral trait like confidence, it would be nice to show both men & women for each example, since society responds differently so often
greeting everyone when you walk in the room is tremedous in almost any social situation. People wait to see if you acknowledge them. even if you dont know that person, and a simple nod and eye contact is all you can give. It does wonders.
Charisma and confidence. AH. Winning attributes of a good human being. When I think about being likeable, loveable, and the best version of myself it is because of these desirable qualities. I hope more people find this video.
A m a quite confidence like Mr. Thomas PB Am effortlessly funny like my brother Dave Chappelle... I radiate confidence like My Prophet And now here I am to learn how to be effortlessly MORE confident from my long term fave Actor Matthew McConaughey....Bring it on
One thing that works for me, in fact has changed my life, mainly because it keeps me in the moment instead of following a preconceived thought: It's called the "three second rule." Upon being introduced to someone or just acknowledging them in passing, I offer a lips-closed smile and maintain eye contact for THREE SECONDS. Any longer can seem creepy, shorter you're searching for a thought instead of being present, and it can seem dismissive to the person you're encountering. Don't talk for three seconds, mentally count one-thousand-one, one-thousand-two, etc...sure it may seem awkward to yourself til you get used to it. Then talk, offer a handshake, look away, whatever. I find 99% of the time the other person looks away first. When you combine that with a sincere interest in the other person you appear confident and attractive.
And then you watch him as Rust Cohle... oh man...*** The best thing that ever happens to television. Ever*** and you got blown away how good actor he is! One and only!
What are some social rules of etiquette everyone should know and follow? Praise publicly. Criticize privately. Don't call someone more than twice continuously. Return money that you have borrowed even before the person ask for it. Never order the expensive dish on the menu when someone else is throwing you a party. Don't ask awakward questions. Always open the door for the person coming behind you irrespective of their gender. Respect different shades of opinion. A 6 can be a 9 too. Never interrupt people talking. If you tease someone and they don't seem to enjoy it. STOP !! When someone shows you a pic on their phone, don't swipe left or right. Never give advice until asked for. Never talk about your riches amidst the poor. Treat the cleaner with the same respect as the CEO. After reading something good. Trying saying thank you. If the person is talking to you, don't look at your phone. When you meet someone after a long time, Unless they want to talk about it, don't talk about their salary and age. Mind your business unless it involves you directly. Practice the art of appreciation. Har Har Mahadev 🙏.
Chance of McConaughey was that his dad was there to teach him with the right lessons and words, enabling him to get this magnetic self-confidence he has. It’s what you learn when reading McConaughey’s book. Unfortunately, we did not have all the chance to have such a dad.
Hmmm…. Backhanded Compliment. They could be Related. Joel is not Bad Looking. He’s Not my Type. So, I can’t saayyy, But, Mcconahey is a Different Kind of Handsome.
Mathew Mccoughney IS a relaxed and carefree person. Here I'm riddled with anxiety in the middle of Mental Health awareness week 'trying' to be like bro..
Confidence- is based upon a highly intelligent person who understands the elements relating to social affairs. Very much an extrovert. Me I am like Harry Potter in front of the mirror of “Erised” I know what I want… but how do I get there?” I being “eccentric” need a different nature of approach. Though I admire people like Matthew, but my communicational skills seem to be limited… I am a bit slower than most, but then I see reality from a very different perspective.
For storytelling, the #1 thing is practice. There’s a reason old people are regarded as better storytellers. They have told their stories many many times already, they’ve told them poorly and gotten meh responses, they’ve done trial and error to figure out what sort of things get better reactions. This amazing hilarious story you hear a person telling to a crowd has usually been told by that person many times before to friends or smaller groups. The video has some pearls to help you on your way, but simple experience in storytelling can’t be faked. I doubt 20 year old Matthew was a tremendous storyteller. If you’re young and think you’re not good at it, remember that maybe you just aren’t good at it YET. By the time you’re 30, 40, 50, etc, if storytelling and getting those reactions is something you’re passionate about, I guarantee you’ll be pretty damn good at it because you’ll have practiced doing it your whole life, you’ll have watched your audiences, and you will have figured out your own nuances that get the reactions you want.
Being disingenuous is not an objective. All the things you mention may be true for Matthew in the moment when "he's on", but enacting them comes from a core of confidence about his objectives & strategies that was developed throughout his life substantially through identifying with his role models. A person has to be themselves, but they can change not by just enacting superficial mannerisms but by understanding themselves, their goals, and thinking through what they need to do to achieve those goals and the life they wish for. While we don't get to choose our parents, we do have more to say about who we surround ourselves with as we get older and to realize what is important to ourselves. Those actors that walked fast to the stage are pretty successful people and they have found their niche, which is what we all would be lucky to identify. And when things don't work out, consider revising one's strategy to overcome the obstructions.
@Charismaoncommand Can you suggest any more female-oriented lessons? A young woman in my family is trying to learn social confidence, and likes your videos, but finds it hard to transfer examples with Matthew McConaughey and the like.
Is that a real, natural confidence? Or is just Matthew good at acting and playing the confident roles. Real him actually looks like the characters that he plays in the movies. The way he moves, the way he talks and the way he smiles is like a confident fictional figure from the movie showing up on in the reality. I believe everyone who got that kind of confidence can acquire any success in any field. Those ppl have a capability to attract ppl and make ppl do whatever he want them to do.
don’t let it discourage you you can do anything you set your mind to i have felt the same way but instead of letting it get to you push through and learn
"be a good storyteller" How can I be it if my social groups think I speak to much and need a lot of time to say stuff and they demand me to come to the point? When I try to tell something and train this style I get interrupted a lot (not just from one but the group seems to agree it's better if someone else is talking or tell te story) If I speak with strangers it might work. But with my established social group I already am stigmatized and can't really catch their attention or join conversations. They even ignore me when I try to join the talk (always when I think one of those finished their text. The other starts talking. He stops I try to join, the first one again.)
If people are telling you to get to the point, then you're probably emphasizing/spending too much time on the wrong part of the story. You've got a voice recorder on your phone right? So pick one of your favorite anecdotes and record it. Listen to yourself telling the story and practice how to make it more exciting to the listener, how to improve your voice, impersonating others in the story. Practice, practice, practice!
🎯 Key Takeaways for quick navigation: 00:14 Matthew *McConaughey's charisma stems from his relaxed and unhurried approach in interactions, setting a carefree tone.* 00:56 Greeting *everyone in a group, not just those deemed beneficial, enhances charisma and leaves a stronger first impression.* 01:51 Taking *up more space and adopting relaxed body language under pressure can convey confidence and ease.* 02:34 Staying *true to oneself and not conforming under social pressure can demonstrate significant confidence.* 03:18 Mastering *the art of storytelling, using emotional journeys, character acting, and present tense narration, can make conversations more captivating and charismatic.* Made with HARPA AI
your videos are good and all. but after watching you for three years, I am not that sure anymore how those talk show scenes relate to our real life to be honest. 😂
I try to imagine myself at a party, perhaps even in my own home in a smaller gathering, or moving around within a group of people at any kind of social setting to apply these techniques personally.
Step 1: Move slowly and don't rush. Look at footage of any Elvis concert when he first comes onstage and you'll see he's doing exactly what you advise. And people don't come more charismatic than Elvis was.
If you are trying to be like Mathew McConaughey or anyone else, then you already lack confidence and will still lack it when you try to be like them. Be yourself and that's it. Period. And some people will like you, and some won't. And be o.k. with that. And then, like people that like you. Don't chase after people that don't.
Hey guys can y'all please, please do a video on James Spader's character of Raymond “Red” Reddington from The Blacklist, i mean not only is he a total badass but he's also super smart and confident and doesn't care what others think of him at all, he would be great to do a video on i think.
2:40 - McConaughey also chose a more comfortable seat. I'd wager most of them are sitting upright because there's no back on that sofa. (IMO, it's an awkward couch.) So, if I had an option, I'd choose to sit on the end, where I can still engage with the group, because it's round, and there's also a curved part to be able to lounge a bit better. Bonus: you can reach the floor for your drink.
At 1:25: A hug when meeting someone for the first time? No way. That can be the most off-putting thing you can do with some people. Being attentive to their comfort level with touch--handshake, hug, fist bump, no touching--would be much more effective in establishing comfort and ease
''Confidence isn't saying to yourself, I know she'll like me...It's saying to yourself, I'll be fine whether she likes me or not.''
Great quote!
it is a good start, but it is still all about you. I prefer "I know I am awesome, but what about you?" it reminds me that I am perfectly validated by myself and to be more curious about them. it is not about trying to be liked, it is about finding out if they are worth liking.
...said the man who has everything
@@michaeljeacock that is still all about you
No.. Its i don't care weather she likes me or not. Im what i am
Here are some tips from us:
- Compliment others genuinely and often,
- Ask more questions about others than you make statements about yourself,
- Assume everyone has something to teach you,
- Present an open body language,
- Do not try to impress
PR, VERY sound advice.
May I add a corollary?
Be kind.
Be polite.
Be courteous.
And be respectful.
Begin with these. If 'they' step over the line, at the very least you'll know you've made your best effort, and do take heart in that, while realizing even your best effort might still fail.
I swear, with these and what PR mentions above, you should do pretty damned well.
Most importantly just be yourself
@@michelrussell2014 I disagree. Building the things above into your behavior takes effort, forces you to NOT just 'be yourself'' but take others into consideration, and for the most part produces far better results.
Present an open body language
I have one problem, i love jumping hanging running just anywhere and people think I'm showing off when I do its sad because I love doing it im not trying to show off sooooo
Not being afraid to look around the room you entered is a big one! Many people just zero in on the person they know in the room.
The simple take away message for me, "be your authentic self, and wear it like a badge".
His authentic self allows him to take up space, sets the precedent and draws people into his world, where hes the main character, and we all come for the ride (stories)
Matt has this calming aura; I cannot read his book without imagining him reading it out. Sets your mind at ease no matter where you are
🙌
The audiobook is narrated by him , it’s awesome
@@JakeSchwepker Yes his audio book is amazing. I'm constantly recommending it to people
What's the name of It?
@@matheusbarbosa6010 Green Lights
Key points
1:20 Take 5 seconds to greet each person in the new social group
2:42 Don't try to blend in
3:15 Become a magnetic storyteller. Reminds me of Jordan P: Your value increases or decreases depending on how you convey ideas to others.
3:36 Cool Moment to show Louis from Ant Man! Love him!
3:45 Preframe story: say here is a funny story! This hooks people in. Then u begin telling your story.
People are wired to love emotional journeys
5:58 Character method = play out your characters. Tell stories with your hands at the same time.
The teachers who influenced me most are those who took the characters in their story
Thank you i
@@donnaquinlan6530 You are very welcome.
Who does't love Louis from Ant Man?
Thanks for this!
I was scrolling for someone like you
Few are so charismatic as this guy. It’s a personality trait that can come off as fake. Just use your own unique personality and go with it.
I agree
Fake it til its without thought, and it will become uniquely you. Musicians, comedians, etc tend to mimic, until they become comfortable and their own voice, sound, style develops.
What you mean to say is that no one is charismatic like this guy, we all have our own brand of charisma and the point is to use his example to bring out your own.
It's like martial arts pal. It's a technique, a trick, until you've practiced long enough that it became you.
This whole "be yourself you're perfect" culture is weak, fake, and really starting to get old
I reckon am just as gooood.
Al right Al right Al right..;)
There's also the fact that he is a top notch professional actor
Matthew is so good at story telling, I'm getting annoyed everytime you cut his telling off😂
matthew just oozes charisma. so glad y’all did a video on him!
omggg ily netflix party !! you should do a video on a series of unfortunate events
Learning mindfulness and how to ground yourself and slow your mind down with breath work helps so much for a few of these points.
Great tip!
Long term meditator - totally! And people pick up on your calm energy - which is a nice feeling to me around.
Matthew shines, literally. His skin and hair GLOW.
Love the advice to determine the mood you want to set for an interaction and spend the first 10-20 seconds bringing that energy. Thanks for this video!
Legend has it matthew learned to be so charismatic by watching charisma on command
📜Here's the summary:
Determine the vibe you want to project (e.g. slow, relaxed, carefree), and embody it for the first 10-20 seconds of contact with the audience
Acknowledge people who don't seem important. Touch.
Stay true to yourself instead of mirroring/blending in: if you want to lounge in your seat, do so even if all others are upright. Take up more space than you need.
Learn how to tell good stories:
* use a preframe hook, e.g. "Here's another funny story. It's true."
* don't just tell the facts, convey the emotions you felt. People love emotional journeys.
* act out the character. Even a change in cadence will be enough to convey another character. You don't have to be a professional actor.
* (!) tell the story in the present tense; it's more immersive
You guys are one of the only people whose online courses are legit. I would recommend them to anyone who isn't comfortable around people. A 5 star review from here.
My fellow introverts, we meet again.
I'm very charismatic in my cave!
U r great mates
I've gained alot of knowledge just from the videos posted here I can just imagine what charisma university would do. It will be Epic
Interesting stories include:
- a good preframe
- emotional experience
- act-out characters
- gesticulating hands
- present tense
I love the disclaimer at the beginning like “even though you are probably uglier that Matthew, you can still use these tips”
How to be confident like M. M.:
1) be born really good looking.
2) have a deeper than average voice
3) grow up somewhere you’ll pick up a disarmingly pleasant accent.
4) use the above to make a lot of money
5) now you too can make the world’s strangest car commercial and still get women and more acting gigs!
😂
Love Matty!!! He's seriously just a cool dude. Glad he won an Oscar, he deserved it!!!
@Charisma on Command thanks for the video! Your channel focuses on boosting one's own charisma, but have you ever done a video on supporting or enhancing someone else's? Being a good "wing man," for example, or subtly encouraging someone who's feeling anxious (i.e. encouraging them without giving them a lecture on what they're doing wrong). Or even if it's someone who is already charismatic, how to play off them in a way that keeps the energy going without trying to one-up them.
Basically, how to use your own charisma to make someone _else_ seem more charismatic. I'd love to see tips on that!
Literally every charisma video out there: Sit up straight, shoulders back open body language, be the dominant one in the room.
Matthew McConaughey: Slouch back far enough in your lounge to a point where no one can see you but you can drink your glass of water from the floor.
I do a lot of these things and many times I end up getting talked over while Im telling a story, people miss my jokes, when I try to sit back and relax it looks like I gained 25 pounds of belly fat, if I do the low mathew type relaxed chill voice I just get completely ignored. Its easier not to get ignored or interrupted when you are a movie star and have the mic on stage.
Just relax, and dont speak if they didnt listen to you, you're Mathew Macconaghey after all
Can everyone just give this comment a thumbs up please ?!
I think just imitating all these without feeling comfortable in own skin wouldn’t work, without confidence you’ll come off as fake! Confidence+humbleness goes a long way!
@@-.__Hazel__.- You are right. Its easy to tell when someone is not being themselves. What this doesnt point out is that many people interrupt no matter how good a story is or how good its being told.
@@eleven8948 Did you ever consider that you're just not being captivating enough to keep people's attention?
When you're nervous, it's easy to spill all the beans at once without any mystery or anticipation.
There is only one caveat. You have conciously do these things until it becomes so normalized in you that you start doing it subconsciously.
Certainly! McConaughey's charisma feels laid-back but intentional, and these habits can be powerful tools. Moving slowly and staying anchored? Those make a massive difference in how others perceive you. Greeting everyone and making yourself comfortable are easy but impactful actions that build rapport.
And his storytelling style? Sharing emotions and acting out characters really hooks people in! Kind of like how in the Sense of Humor Improvement Program, small techniques can make a big difference in connecting with others.
To me, this video is more about how to be the Cool Guy in any setting, but isn't really transferable for women. People will criticize women draping themselves over couches, taking up extra space, talking too slow, & possibly even going up to each person.
When it's about a neutral trait like confidence, it would be nice to show both men & women for each example, since society responds differently so often
Oh, this totally works for women. I actually do a lot of these things and it's great.
greeting everyone when you walk in the room is tremedous in almost any social situation. People wait to see if you acknowledge them. even if you dont know that person, and a simple nod and eye contact is all you can give. It does wonders.
Love these videos! A masterclass on getting along better with everyone in your life.
Matthew is a great role model for these examples.
Charisma and confidence. AH. Winning attributes of a good human being. When I think about being likeable, loveable, and the best version of myself it is because of these desirable qualities. I hope more people find this video.
A m a quite confidence like Mr. Thomas PB
Am effortlessly funny like my brother Dave Chappelle...
I radiate confidence like My Prophet
And now here I am to learn how to be effortlessly MORE confident from my long term fave Actor Matthew McConaughey....Bring it on
I really like how you put out the important points with highlighter and the bold subtitles
I returned his book. I'm never interested in anything his says. But I like his relaxed posture.
One thing that works for me, in fact has changed my life, mainly because it keeps me in the moment instead of following a preconceived thought: It's called the "three second rule." Upon being introduced to someone or just acknowledging them in passing, I offer a lips-closed smile and maintain eye contact for THREE SECONDS. Any longer can seem creepy, shorter you're searching for a thought instead of being present, and it can seem dismissive to the person you're encountering. Don't talk for three seconds, mentally count one-thousand-one, one-thousand-two, etc...sure it may seem awkward to yourself til you get used to it. Then talk, offer a handshake, look away, whatever. I find 99% of the time the other person looks away first. When you combine that with a sincere interest in the other person you appear confident and attractive.
This is one of the best Charisma on command videos I've watched! Channel getting better and better
🙌
I think you can " fake " charisma but when you have ppl naturally born with it the vibe is not the same
People is spelled people, not ppl.
And then you watch him as Rust Cohle... oh man...*** The best thing that ever happens to television. Ever*** and you got blown away how good actor he is! One and only!
What are some social rules of etiquette everyone should know and follow?
Praise publicly. Criticize privately.
Don't call someone more than twice continuously.
Return money that you have borrowed even before the person ask for it.
Never order the expensive dish on the menu when someone else is throwing you a party.
Don't ask awakward questions.
Always open the door for the person coming behind you irrespective of their gender.
Respect different shades of opinion. A 6 can be a 9 too.
Never interrupt people talking.
If you tease someone and they don't seem to enjoy it. STOP !!
When someone shows you a pic on their phone, don't swipe left or right.
Never give advice until asked for.
Never talk about your riches amidst the poor.
Treat the cleaner with the same respect as the CEO.
After reading something good. Trying saying thank you.
If the person is talking to you, don't look at your phone.
When you meet someone after a long time, Unless they want to talk about it, don't talk about their salary and age.
Mind your business unless it involves you directly.
Practice the art of appreciation.
Har Har Mahadev 🙏.
Chance of McConaughey was that his dad was there to teach him with the right lessons and words, enabling him to get this magnetic self-confidence he has. It’s what you learn when reading McConaughey’s book. Unfortunately, we did not have all the chance to have such a dad.
i kinda do greet only the person i have work with... so that tip of yours actually very helpful for me.... can i get a heart 💜
What makes Jeff Goldblum so damn charismatic? I’ve been waiting for that one.
I like how most of the videos are just repeating what the other videls have already told you. Reaffirmation and helps to make it really hit home.
“Nothing great was ever achieved without enthusiasm.”
-Ralph Waldo Emerson
Love Matthew McConaughey 🔥
🔥
Appearance is also important. Dress in what makes you feel cool and confident. Decide on a cool hair style and facial hair style.
AH! Relaxed attitude. That is the vibe I need. Thanks!
Matthew could totally play Joel Osten 😂😂😂😂
All he has to do is blink 800 times a minute...lol.
Hmmm…. Backhanded Compliment.
They could be Related.
Joel is not Bad Looking. He’s Not my Type. So, I can’t saayyy,
But, Mcconahey is a Different Kind of Handsome.
I think it's partly a matter of being comfortable in your own skin.
Mathew Mccoughney IS a relaxed and carefree person. Here I'm riddled with anxiety in the middle of Mental Health awareness week 'trying' to be like bro..
find a way to blend his method into yours
Confidence- is based upon a highly intelligent person who understands the elements relating to social affairs.
Very much an extrovert.
Me I am like Harry Potter in front of the mirror of “Erised” I know what I want… but how do I get there?”
I being “eccentric” need a different nature of approach.
Though I admire people like Matthew, but my communicational skills seem to be limited… I am a bit slower than most, but then I see reality from a very different perspective.
For storytelling, the #1 thing is practice. There’s a reason old people are regarded as better storytellers. They have told their stories many many times already, they’ve told them poorly and gotten meh responses, they’ve done trial and error to figure out what sort of things get better reactions. This amazing hilarious story you hear a person telling to a crowd has usually been told by that person many times before to friends or smaller groups. The video has some pearls to help you on your way, but simple experience in storytelling can’t be faked. I doubt 20 year old Matthew was a tremendous storyteller. If you’re young and think you’re not good at it, remember that maybe you just aren’t good at it YET. By the time you’re 30, 40, 50, etc, if storytelling and getting those reactions is something you’re passionate about, I guarantee you’ll be pretty damn good at it because you’ll have practiced doing it your whole life, you’ll have watched your audiences, and you will have figured out your own nuances that get the reactions you want.
Being disingenuous is not an objective. All the things you mention may be true for Matthew in the moment when "he's on", but enacting them comes from a core of confidence about his objectives & strategies that was developed throughout his life substantially through identifying with his role models. A person has to be themselves, but they can change not by just enacting superficial mannerisms but by understanding themselves, their goals, and thinking through what they need to do to achieve those goals and the life they wish for. While we don't get to choose our parents, we do have more to say about who we surround ourselves with as we get older and to realize what is important to ourselves. Those actors that walked fast to the stage are pretty successful people and they have found their niche, which is what we all would be lucky to identify. And when things don't work out, consider revising one's strategy to overcome the obstructions.
@Charismaoncommand Can you suggest any more female-oriented lessons? A young woman in my family is trying to learn social confidence, and likes your videos, but finds it hard to transfer examples with Matthew McConaughey and the like.
Is that a real, natural confidence? Or is just Matthew good at acting and playing the confident roles. Real him actually looks like the characters that he plays in the movies. The way he moves, the way he talks and the way he smiles is like a confident fictional figure from the movie showing up on in the reality.
I believe everyone who got that kind of confidence can acquire any success in any field. Those ppl have a capability to attract ppl and make ppl do whatever he want them to do.
Question: does the occupying more space concept apply to both men and women? Does it have the same effect?
How on earth can I be cool WITHOUT TRYING when I literally have to watch an ENTIRE 10 min video on being cool without trying!!?🤦♂️
don’t let it discourage you you can do anything you set your mind to
i have felt the same way but instead of letting it get to you push through and learn
Guess just live the moment?
Just do it
"Alright, Alright, Alright"
-Matthew McConaughey
I love that Steve Carell is shown during the line "No matter what you look like"
"be a good storyteller"
How can I be it if my social groups think I speak to much and need a lot of time to say stuff and they demand me to come to the point? When I try to tell something and train this style I get interrupted a lot (not just from one but the group seems to agree it's better if someone else is talking or tell te story)
If I speak with strangers it might work. But with my established social group I already am stigmatized and can't really catch their attention or join conversations. They even ignore me when I try to join the talk (always when I think one of those finished their text. The other starts talking. He stops I try to join, the first one again.)
If people are telling you to get to the point, then you're probably emphasizing/spending too much time on the wrong part of the story.
You've got a voice recorder on your phone right? So pick one of your favorite anecdotes and record it. Listen to yourself telling the story and practice how to make it more exciting to the listener, how to improve your voice, impersonating others in the story. Practice, practice, practice!
Those dont seem like friends to me
🎯 Key Takeaways for quick navigation:
00:14 Matthew *McConaughey's charisma stems from his relaxed and unhurried approach in interactions, setting a carefree tone.*
00:56 Greeting *everyone in a group, not just those deemed beneficial, enhances charisma and leaves a stronger first impression.*
01:51 Taking *up more space and adopting relaxed body language under pressure can convey confidence and ease.*
02:34 Staying *true to oneself and not conforming under social pressure can demonstrate significant confidence.*
03:18 Mastering *the art of storytelling, using emotional journeys, character acting, and present tense narration, can make conversations more captivating and charismatic.*
Made with HARPA AI
Walk into any room and situation, clap your hands together once and say “Alright, alright, alright!”. Even works at wakes.
I always take more spot ! It makes me feel really comfortable. If i sit straight! I feel uncomfortable not authentic
When trying to practice everything I learnt, suddenly my mind goes frozen
Practice more at home until it becomes natural
I feel so much more confident after watching this tutorial!
i love this channel so much it hurts. thank you for your work.
perfection does not exis....
...t! 😝
How dare you not give me the end of the email story I'm hooked
Thanks for doin' McConaughey, just keep livin'💯
We can learn so much from his charisma.
The man is a national treasure.
Matthew is terrific! Never really noticed his charm. Thanks to your presentation.
your videos are good and all. but after watching you for three years, I am not that sure anymore how those talk show scenes relate to our real life to be honest. 😂
I try to imagine myself at a party, perhaps even in my own home in a smaller gathering, or moving around within a group of people at any kind of social setting to apply these techniques personally.
Step 1: Move slowly and don't rush. Look at footage of any Elvis concert when he first comes onstage and you'll see he's doing exactly what you advise. And people don't come more charismatic than Elvis was.
We need a Saul Goodman episode!
I wish I had 5% the confidence of MM. What a guy.
Very good video, really informative unlike most of the videos and channels online
It's not enough to act like King of Jungle, you must Be The King 👑
I've been slouching all my life, and yet.... I'm told by everyone to sit up straight. Now I have a legit reason to slouch lol!!!
Thinking of trying this! Thanks for the heads-up.
If you are trying to be like Mathew McConaughey or anyone else, then you already lack confidence and will still lack it when you try to be like them. Be yourself and that's it. Period. And some people will like you, and some won't. And be o.k. with that. And then, like people that like you. Don't chase after people that don't.
Great tips 👏 love this breakdown
Its so frustrating that some people are just born that way, while the rest have to watch youtube and make notes
He started his career by coming to my home filmed show. Gave him a couple of pointers, glad it all working out
And you take credit for his success with those few pointers?
Anyone here done the course? Been thinking of buying it for like a year now 👀
Hey guys can y'all please, please do a video on James Spader's character of Raymond “Red” Reddington from The Blacklist, i mean not only is he a total badass but he's also super smart and confident and doesn't care what others think of him at all, he would be great to do a video on i think.
0:12 man this channel is savage lmao.
Everyone will look like a great mean when they're talking , it's the people you're surrounded by that matters!
2:40 - McConaughey also chose a more comfortable seat. I'd wager most of them are sitting upright because there's no back on that sofa. (IMO, it's an awkward couch.) So, if I had an option, I'd choose to sit on the end, where I can still engage with the group, because it's round, and there's also a curved part to be able to lounge a bit better. Bonus: you can reach the floor for your drink.
as a sociopath i love your videos
6:02 hey, it's The Party! That made my day.
1:14 on the right is the best part of this video
There's a fine line between confidence and arrogance, which masks in Matthew's case an underlying fragile narcissism. Surpising that was missed.
I don't think that I'm a great storyteller. Do you have any books to recommend to improve that personality trait?
'You gotta stay relaxed' - Mark Hanna
At 1:25: A hug when meeting someone for the first time? No way. That can be the most off-putting thing you can do with some people. Being attentive to their comfort level with touch--handshake, hug, fist bump, no touching--would be much more effective in establishing comfort and ease
You need to do a video on dealing with one upper people at work without burning bridges!
Damn Mathew was literally born cool & that’s just him being comfortable with himself
I worked for a guy who acted nice to us, give us a pat on the back but it was obvious he only talked to us because it was business.
His memoir Greenlight's is very good. I would recommend reading.