VENDING MACHINE OF LOVE | The Theme from OnlyCans
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 11 ก.พ. 2021
- ONLYCANS IS NOW AVAILABLE FOR FREE ON STEAM!
store.steampowered.com/app/41...
Yes, it's marked as adult but it's just about soft drinks, honestly. Seriously though, not for kids.
I was recent approached by a very dear friend of mine, a game developer, and asked to produce a theme song for the game they and their team were developing. I, being the wonderful friend I am was delighted at the prospect of helping a friend in their creative endeavours.
Then I played the game.
'OnlyCans: Thirst Date' is a game where you befriend and photograph a colourful cast of carbonated chromium companions and that is all I am prepared to say about it.
In all seriousness it's an incredibly well made little game and completely free on Steam and Itch.io. It's very silly, more than a little naughty and totally just about soft drinks.
If you're of sound mind and legal age I thoroughly recommend you check it out.
#OnlyCans
-----
Check out the full Stupendium originals playlist for all of my original songs!
STUPENDIUM ORIGINALS: th-cam.com/users/playlist?list...
THE STUPENDIUM ON SPOTIFY:
bit.ly/Stupendify
THE STUPENDIUM ON iTUNES:
bit.ly/StupendiTunes
Lyrics and vocals by The Stupendium
Additional vocals by Chel Wong:
linktr.ee/ChelWongAudio
Video edited by Paul Marke:
www.paulmarke.com/
Motion graphics by The Stupendium
Camera by Nick J. Henderson
Mixing by oo Oxygen:
/ @oxygenbeats
Beat produced by Anywaywell:
anywaywell.com/
-----
You can support The Stupendium on Patreon!
/ thestupendium
Grab your official Stupendium Merchandise! Shirts and mugs and hats, oh my! stupendiumstore.com/
Join the official Stupendium discord server!
/ discord
Drop me a tweet? @TheStupendium
The Stupendium is a musician, animator and content creator, creating weird, wonderful and usually incredibly nerdy songs and animations. Join them on their journey to obscure, niche internet stardom! They have some pretty decent videos, wonderful facial hair and a great sense of discomfort describing themself in the third person. - เพลง
OnlyCans: Thirst Date is now availavle for FREE on Steam! store.steampowered.com/app/417360/ #gaming_news
LYRICS:
VERSE 1
Hey guys, are your lips dry?
Any desiccated ladies trying to get by?
I know the best way for the girls and the boys to
Come together and enjoy a little moisture
So you’re waiting on the mate that’s one-a-million?
And carbonation ain’t the way that you envisioned
You say it’s strange but baby shed your inhibitions
And let your date slip into something aluminium
She’s elegant and eloquent and so effervescent
Subtle bubbles in my stubble feeling ever so pleasant
Never thought I’d find a girl with such a delicate essence
Free with the meal deal at the delicatessen
Saw you sittin’ in the fridge with a twinkle
Are you a multipack can or are you single?
A little of sipping and a spritz isn’t sinful
I’m just finna get my finger in your ring pull
CHORUS
So slot your pennies in the vending machine of love
And pick that fizzy little minx that you’ve been dreaming of
If you’re cursed with the thirst of a lonely man
You can get your juices flowing with some OnlyCans
Every glamorous can has a heart to fill
So I hope that you can handle three-thirty mil
Get lost in the froth as the foam expands
Get your lovin’ whilst you’re gluggin’ on some OnlyCans
VERSE 2
Now you’ve seen other paysite galleries
But none of those girls taste like raspberries
So if you think we’re just some obscene cannery
All our cans are over eighteen calories
So, give a spray for some flirtatious behaviour
That come-hither hiss is what you came for
We’ve been brewing up a plethora of flavours
Say we’re crude, you can never say we’re tasteless
So if you drink it straight or with a mixer
Bring a mister or a missus home for dinner
Everybody’s got a different fizzle in their spritzer
What’s it matter what ingredients are on your sticker?
I haven’t met you all, but it’s contextual
You’re all impeccable if it’s consensual
If you’re ace, demi, pan, flexible
End of the day we are all can-sexual
CHORUS
So slot your pennies in the vending machine of love
And pick that fizzy little minx that you’ve been dreaming of
If you’re cursed with the thirst of a lonely man
You can get your juices flowing with some OnlyCans
Every glamorous can has a heart to fill
So I hope that you can handle three-thirty mil
We can semi-guarantee that we won’t be banned
Get your lovin’ whilst you’re gluggin’ on some OnlyCans
VERSE 3
May be fizzy but I’ll spit a little candour
Sure it’s sticky but we’ll lick the spillage after
There’s only one app for tin-can philanderers
Snapping what the can did with your candid camera
Can a can cancan? Yes it can, all the cans in Cannes are
Canuck cans in Canada, Manly cans in Canberra in canoes
Grabbing noodles and canoodling with cans in Can Tho
Mexican cans in Cancun, scandalously scantily clad in their scanties and decanting at you
Camping with a Scandinavian can, under a canopy, alone in a canyon with your can boo
Share a cannoli with Italian cans on the canals before a candlelit dance
Then canter off to Canterbury for a canny romance, you better cancel your plans
This Can-sonova can’t handle the demand
Of Cantabrian cañ-oritas in cantinas with fans on the Canary Islands
Strip canasta ‘til you’re down to your pants
and your can-panion froths over your hand
Damn, these Cantonese Shizes are your creamiest stans
So go over to - Can-bodia,
You can let the local flavour flow over you
Getting down with the hard, round chromium
Lovin’s never been so low-sodium
Can looking like a snack? That’s a canape
Can-paining like Barack? That’s a candidate
Can sweet on your tongue? That’s a candy cane
Can rocking them guns? That’s some cannonade
Feel that can in your heart? That’s a cannula
Can sends it’s regards? That’s a Canister
Inquisitive can? That’s a canvasser
Insensitive can? Cantankerous
CHORUS
So slot your pennies in the vending machine of love
And pick that fizzy little minx that you’ve been dreaming of
If you’re cursed with the thirst of a lonely man
You can get your juices flowing with some OnlyCans
Every glamorous can has a heart to fill
So I hope that you can handle three-thirty mil
Hey, don’t touch, just hold the cam
Get your lovin’ whilst you’re gluggin’ on some OnlyCans
SPOKEN OUTRO:
So download OnlyCans, the game for soda lovers!
It’s got very high ratings!
…Oh, oh sorry. No. It’s very ‘hydrating’, my mistake.
How did you miss JAMAY-CAN?
This song might be the last piece of evidence of human life in the future and that scares me.
This was a very good song
Availavle
Hey Stupes, the game is not available in germany, seems I need a VPN. . . xD
I can't believe it took me my entire life until now to realize that every letter in LGBTQ stands for can-sexual.
Unless your ace then your cant-sexual
@@artoriasgameing6601 lmao that was good one ngl
@@artoriasgameing6601 💀
wait am i dumb i cant get what they r trying to say- can someone say like what letters in cansexual spell sexualities?
@@s0livagant_ They Can-Sexual, as in Have Sex. They Can in fact, Sexual. I think.
IF A SONG ABOUT CANS CAN RESPECT CONSENT AND LGBTQ, THEN YOU CAN
can can can
cansent*
YESS PREACH MATE
I cant
@@koopaking1959 you CAN
Loving how this attracted all the aroaces💀
I actually feel accepted here, thank you
As a aroace I can confirm
Sup
I'm chillin with a can in hand yea
@@ThePokemonSquadX is there a single place not being sexual is considered outrageous? I'm not ace and I but I legit can't even imagine a place that someone would be hated for not wanting that kind of thing... I mean maybe it's harder to date considering your options are damn near zero in the modern era of thots and degenerates... But as long as you find another ace in this world of cards it's not exactly something id imagine one would even think about... So I'm struggling to see why you would only feel "accepted" here and not literally everywhere.... Maybe pushy parents who want grandchildren? But even then in that situation your parents are just Karen's you can easily ignore and move on...
"get your mind out of the gutters"
The Stupendium has never sounded more british
Edit: THE MAN HIMSELF RESPONDED :OOOOOO
Have you seen my House Flipper song? Or Mask of the Rose? :P
@@TheStupendium naw im a new fan, but i'll check it out!
I'd HEAVILY recommend listening to Neath. Don't be afraid about the lenght of it and just give It a listen.
I found It like that and It is my favorite song of all time now
For me it was and always will be:
"I've always saw it more of a Cut Here."
Bit British innit bruv.
"Im sorry in advance"
*proceeds to make an absolute banger*
Get some help
@@pixilpiro1223 never
@@pixilpiro1223 if u think j need to get help for liking this song, then i think u need that help.
@@TwinaWina I also like this, So ill get some help,Just so you know, He already said get help
@Totally Unstoppable Why wouldnt be ohio
Did I really just enjoy a song about sexualized cans? Yes. Do I regret it? Hell no.
same tbh
Same
How CANdid of you, I admire your CANdor.
just like me fr
*This is ironically my favorite song of his right now.*
If I had a nickel for every time I’ve been told to “get your mind out of the gutter” in reference to beverages in a Stupendium song about beverages, I’d have 2 nickels, which isn’t a lot but dang is it hilarious that it happened twice
doofenshmrit quote real
Curse you, Perry the Platypus!
🟦
🟧
:/
🟫
🟦
🟧
>:O
Idk if this is about this song and a cup head song- but it might just be
Hello Doctor, been awhile~.
*trying to impress a woman*
"oh yeah im a huge fan of pop music"
*Shows her this*
Thats clever. Good pun. 👍
Let me guess... She's in love with you now?)
Aha hilarious!
As woman i would be impressed
@@martamorawska6658Same lol
Everyone: You can’t just make a song where all the rhymes are can
Stupendium: What if I did so anyway
then it would turn out amazing
you missed your chance to say "But you see... I *can*."
@@robbyrabago1437 Or to say "Hold my can"
“Yes I can.”
Nothing else *only cans?*
i am speechless. i never thought id love a song about oversexualized soft drinks but here i am. but seriously this is just amazing i love it
Of course he "can"
@@dpshadow7276 💀💀💀💀
@@dpshadow7276 *they
"I'd never thought I'd love a song about oversexualizing soft drinks" i
XD I mean same though
The fact that this song manages to be so queer-positive and sex-positive, by shining light on not as talked about sexualities, spreading important messages about consent and bringing up how sex isn’t something to be ashamed of in any (consensual) form because everyone is different and that’s ok while also being a song about dead souls trapped in pornographic soda cans and being an absolute banger is so impressive. Props to the Stupendium, they’ve truly outdone themself
I didn't know it was was a sex song I just thought it was a song about Loving soda
@@jakeutage374 hello there fellow ace
@@apolimeow Hello
@@apolimeow wait(sorry I'm late) but what's a ace, I just realized that
@@jakeutage374 ace means asexual
“Hey I’m making a silly little game about romantic sodas, think you could make a little jingle for the title screen for me? Nothing too crazy”
Stupendium: *focused thinking of over 100 can puns* “yea I think I can make something”
This might sound dumb but this gives me gender
That's why Gender is a fluid.
@@TheStupendium nice one 😂
@@TheStupendium I was already in (good) shock from the song, but this just adds carbonation.
Honestly same
The gender has.. A *cherry* masculine taste.. Very carbonated.. It makes me feel like I *can* do anything
Onlycans developers: this is impossible, we'll never find someone crazy enough to make music for our game!
Stupendium's friend, lit by dramatic lighting: I know a guy
Yes!
Genius
“LIT BY DRAMATIC LIGHTING”
I know a great musical guy
I CHOKED ON MY BREAKFAST LMAO
the fact that this song about having *relations* with soda cans is also one of the most inclusive and beautiful love songs ever written is amazing
"If you enjoyed the song, then please get help"
Stups aint pulling any punches 💀
I feel he's just had this song on his computer for years and was just waiting for any excuse he could find to upload it without looking suspicious
OnlyCans is in fact... A real game
@@randomdragon2589 I didn't say it's not...?
@@randomdragon2589 But who says the game was there before the song?
@@randomdragon2589 the game was made as a cover for the song obviously /s
@@williamsmith6921 obviously
If this is a song about soft drinks and nothing else...
...does that mean it's a pop song?
*Badum, Chhh*
“If your cursed with the thirst of a lonely man”
This, this is why I love humanity.
Sans is that you
Soda pop song >:)
I just realized that "get your mind out of the gutter" is something Stupes says in their Milk Milk Lemonade song, which has over a hundred beverage puns- soft drinks included.
Talk about genderfluid AM I RIGHT!?
Is difficult to explain...
"I'm very sorry you had to see that"
"If you enjoyed the song, please get help"
i have never been so offended by something i 100% agree with
@ExtraGoose Animations Same-
I’m sorry for people who haven’t seen this
This is so cursed and yet so groovy at the same time
Wait-
me to
I'm not saying this song is something I listen to often, but its hard to be sad when listening to a song about sexy soda cans.
It's super catchy for literally no reason
So we found the cure for momentary depression
I actually went through with a pencil and paper and throughout the whole song (not inclunding any in the intro or outro or echoes at the end of some lines) you said the word *Can* 87 times! There's got to be some kind of award for this
I CAN't believe it!
Why pencil and paper when you can just:
text = {copy lyrics}
print(text.lower().count("can"))
(btw I got 89)
WAS THAT THE CAN OF 87?!
@@DanyaV-real I got 90, using a clicker counter, clicked every time I heard/saw in lyrics "can"
@@emyjuli2724 True, the problem with my method was that it didn't count the word "cañ". Thanks for your correction. (Also I know that comment is 1 month old but I was too lazy to reply earlier and only now decided to do it okay goodbye)
Oh man, as an asexual with a soda addiction this was actually all I needed in life. I've been playing this song on repeat for weeks!
Same!!
We are unCANnily similar.
KA sparkling black grape my belovéd
Hello fellow soda-loving ace person
I’m aroace but I just found out I’m can-sexual
this is one of the most incredible things i have ever seen in my life
Awh, jeez! Thanks Rusty!
Only, if he Can agree with it.
@@TheSGL is that pun intentional?
i recommend you play the actual game, can i dare to say it every second is a wallpaper can-tendar
Is there hope for a collab between Rustage and stupendium
as an aroace person who doesn’t drink carbonated drinks, I’ve been listening to this for days on end. thank you for this song stupendium
The fact this is one of The Stupendium's highest viewed videos on their channel makes me happy
There are three things in this song that I love :
1. That beat
2. Mentioning the commonly forgot about sexualities (bout time for me to see something with pan in it!)
3. Not mentioning the fact that the cans strait up have souls in them and there is a flesh can with the soul of the CEOs son.
yeah, youd think the whole flesh-can thing would be right up stupes' alley
WAIT DON'T BRING UP THE THIRST BORN
You’ve got 420 likes, nice
Although there is a very vague illusion to the third thing with the line, "What's it matter what ingredients are on your sticker?"
i think you mean, can
He flexes his vocabulary and his style of clothing. Only he can pull it off
only he CAN do it
Unfortunately, to me, every man can pull off that style of clothing... and ONLY that style of clothing. Why does it look good to me?!
@@ChestersonJack not entirely sure. Probably you like those who are outgoing with their style
Can we not talk so much about pulling off my clothing? For one you might break the buttons!
@@TheStupendium I agree with you. There is too many good things to say that if I typed it all my fingers would fall off
"this is about soft drinks and nothing else" he says as he writes the best innuendos I've ever heard
Oh god… I fizzed everywhere..
😧
NAHHHHH-
WHAT
Rocket Fizzed
Sodaxual assault
You took “sex sells” to a whole new level.
Corporate would be proud
yes indeed
Frankly so did the actual game 💀
SEX SELLS AND SO DOES LUST BUT WHERE DOES IT ALL COME FROM- /lyr
The fact that this game is secretly about a guy trying to bring his son back to life via innocent souls trapped in soda cans makes this song feel a bit more sinister than intended.
Came from the game theory video too?
@@itsgirlcraft5842 Yep!
It does explain why the cans are quite, uh, *vocal*.
This makes the line: never thought I find a girl with such delicate essence' feel different remember he might be talking about the spirt in the can
I mean The Stupendium is an ace on making villain songs that imo rival Disney
Vending machine of love: Febreary 2021
Stupes coming out as pan: May 2021
On a totally unrelated note
The cans in the background Pink Yellow Cyan.
"Bring a mister or a missus home for dinner
Everybody’s got a different fizzle in their spritzer
What’s it matter what ingredients are on your sticker?"
"If youre ace, demi, Pan, flexible"
Both a Pan icon and a Can icon.
Not sure if anyone will ever read this but as an ace person the one line of recognition really means so much. Its been years since this song released but ive finally accepted myaelf and this aort of recognition does ab indescribable amount of good
Okay, how is it even PHYSICALLY POSSIBLE for somebody to be THIS good at puns?????? Did this dude make a deal with Satan or something to get this insane level of skill???? 😂
Knowing The Stupendium, most likely. After all....
It's whiskey business when you're playing Devil's Advocate, and this beverage needs leverage to ever get away.
@@anangelnamedcecil4958 👏
Paganini 2
Since pans are just an upgraded species of us bisexuals, I suppose the puns are just a part of the...
Meal Deal.
I'm sorry
@@blankcanvasstudios3463 I don't get it.
I counted them saying the word "can" no less than 87 times in this
fun fact, it's actually exactly 90
was this comment the Can of 87?! lol.
I got 82 when i counted
The bite of 87?
are we including the puns?
Can't even cansider something like this to be canon to the Stupendium's cantinuation of a healthy community.
Can you?
Gotta speak candidly, I can't
@@fufu_kunnn with full candor?
As an asexual person this song fills me with so much happiness. Thank you stupes!!!
i have a few dirty jokes in mind, but the short coment is yes.
if you click down, you forced yourself to see a bad joke.
sex is cool, but these cans are cooler.
As an ace person I’m literally crying, we never get representation, especially in these types of songs I love it
I gasped in excitement!!
I know right!
Mood
because it's sexual, and you are ace, therefore it seems odd it participate with the sexual song, yk?
Yes it was amazing
the pan-colored cans, the fancy outfits, the music, the puns, i love everything about this
nice pfp
I didn't even notice the pan-cans! 😮
Kel 👍
@@_0Happy_Face0_ Me either until I saw the mv
I like you pfp lmao
Such vo-can-ulary.
this song came on my playlist while i was drinking a can of soda and i don't know if that made listening to this better or worse
Someone had to paint a bunch of cans that they then had to dress up in ties, bows and garters for this. If it wasn't Stupendium Man himself, I wonder what poor soul had to do that.
That was all me. :P
@@TheStupendium I applaud your devotion to the project and how much attention to detail you paid. Because of you I actually did look up the game and had an amazing time torturing my boyfriend as we played it together. Thank you and thanks to your friend for this game!
@@Ballira He puts so much effort into his songs, it’s genuinely stunning!
@@TheStupendium All alone?😳
Damn I don't know if I want to know how long this took. Must've been a lot of work...
That's a dream job!
Stupendium's search history: Locations that start with Can
Words that start with Can
Idioms and phrases that start with Can
Can puns
@@cantchange901 Nothing wrong with perusing, browsing, skimming through, or even just a cursory glance at the thesaurus.
His history while making Rouge Gallery must be twice the length of equator.
@@tretretre1111 I was expecting you using some can puns....but i guess you *can*T
MI6 is currently wondering if they should ask the NHS to dispatch an ambulance to his house.
@@cantchange901 Even if he did, that doesn't mean he didn't look up those things. It's one thing to get a hundred words with can in it, it's another to make song lyrics out of them.
Anyway, in his song "amateur wordsmith" he outright says that "you'll often find him leafing through a damp thesaurus".
"If you liked this song, get help" fair, but you don't gotta call me out like that
2:41 "I wonder how many times I can say the word "can" in a single verse"
I’m a Vietnamese who has been listening to a hell ton of English musics, so the “grabbing noodles and canooding with Cans in Cần Thơ” hit me like a damn truck and left my jaw dropped 😭😭😭
Lmao samee
The Italian part hit me like a pizza cutter
@@user-fs1lp2xq6g HELP
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN-
@@BreadnButter2343 Cần Thơ is a city in Vietnam, I wasn’t expecting something Vietnam-related to be mentioned in the song
If I had a nickel for every time the Stupendium made a song about beverages and told me to get my mind out of the gutter, I'd have 2 nickels.
Which isn't a lot, but it's weird it happened twice.
@Samael Strebinger this and the cuphead song
If you're wondering it's "Milk Milk Lemonade"
@@kidjames6875 Fun fact: There is an Amy Schumer song with the same name!
Don't forget his christmas song with the santa cola.
@@bernardomarkuskampffdemelo4323 a disgrace
This feels sort of like a commercial for a little bit but without any specific branding for a soda, just the generic idea of soda, and It's a little uncanny and I like it.
If you look up "banger" in the dictionary, this song is listed
This song manages to be wonderfully sex positive, LGBT+ friendly, pro sex industry, while also being deeply hilarious and an absolute banger. Smashed it again Stupendium!
It’s amazing he made a completely normal song about soft drinks so expansive.
It’s amazing how a song about being horny for soda cans is such a banger
@@michaelzhang9806 wut u mean?
The song says "You CAN be what you want, we all have drinked from Cans"
Definitely a "bang"er.
Couldn't resist.
"I'm very sorry you had to see that"
"If you enjoyed the song, please get help"
Never have I heard such lies
My 62 year old dad absolutely loves this song and thinks of it as a s*x song about men and women. And whenever and I mean EVERY SINGLE TIME, I try and explain to him that this song is about a game where you sexualize cans he just brushes it off and calls me an idiot-
Art can have many interpretations.
Show her the game and tell us how it goes
(Edit typo)
@@Mr._inconsistent her?
@@Mr._inconsistenther?
@@Mr._inconsistent her?
Had a friend show me this out of nowhere a day ago. This is way better than I expected it to be and I now have new music to listen to. Thanks for making a song about JUST SODA AND NOTHING ELSE so good.
“say we’re crude you can never say we’re tasteless” is a CRIMINALLY underrated line
All of his lines are underrated tbh
Agreed, one of the best. Dude drops a couple high-quality bon mots almost every time, this is one of them here for sure.
@@apterixuwu Not all of them. Some of them get the recognition they deserve.
This is probably one of my favorite songs of his, I love it so much.
What's the deal with comments like "[something] - is underrated line"!? Aren't we already here to appreciate all lines of the song? How do you even know what lines rated what in other's minds?
I've listened to this like 500 times
you can* still listen to it if you want
(sorry i had to)
Glad you're enjoying it, man! :D
I'm not sorry in the slightest.
this is my 501th
Hey! Is that guy that does the videos... Occasionally. 😋
Gotta be the most enjoyful ad ever
This song include 10 times as many can puns as I thought were possible in the English language.
This was advertised as a completely normal song and I was not disappointed! Totally not romantic and it’s a just song about soda pop :)
This person gets it!
Not to mention that it SLAPS
Completely normal song, it's just about soda!
You sound so ironic...?
@@five_times_avy shh don’t reveal my secret
Imagine sitting down and seeing an email from your friend. It says "Hey man, you make really good game-themed songs! I'm working on a game can you make one for my game?"
So you're like, "Alright bet. Send the game and I'll see what I can do!"
And "soda can fetish the game" is what they send...
This is probably what happened
@@Br_wnskinarii check the desc
I aspire to have this level of songwriting talent someday. Seriously, people should take notes from this song about cans and absolutely nothing else
Im a drag king whose name is Sodapop. How do I NOT perform this? 😂
"What's your favorite song?"
"It's... complicated. But awesome."
Me, explaining some of my favourite TH-cam songs to my grandkids:
"At the time we used to play Minecraft, and someone who did made this song about being a dwarf that digs holes. There was one about Yoda from Star Wars ranting about being attacked by seagulls. And of course the sexy innuendo rap about soft drinks."
"Sure, grandpa. Now take your meds."
@@HaganeNoGijutsushi I love it XDD
“Call us crude, you can never say we’re tasteless.”
This man. is a GODDAMN. LYRICAL. GENIUS!!
I don't get it. Maybe cause english isn't ma first language
@@RiixxMC
crude (in drinks): if something doesn't have a certain softness that is wanted, it is called crude.
crude (in dating): if someone is rude or unfiltered, they are crude.
Tasteless (in general): tasteless is something that doesn't have flavour.
Tasteless (in relationships): when a person is boring, doesn't talk much or doesn't do much in a relationship, they are tasteless.
Because soft drinks always have flavour, they *cannot* be tasteless. But soft drinks *can* be crude.
The line is good because it works as a sentence for relationships, but also can be a sentence for soft drinks.
This makes it clever.
@@archedkraken3119 thank you so much! :)
Technically, soft drinks "can" be flavourless...
LaCroix
Kind of random but i keep thinking of "Cabinet man" when listening to this song. The story of Cabinet man is that there's a man who get's stuck in an arcade video game and with this i imagine a man who got stuck in a vending machine and who makes concoction and drinks for people while hiding in the machine.
Sir I do not think you understand
This song has me in an ABSOLUTE chokehold
It’s too good. You’re a lyrical genius and every listen is better than the last. You’re my favorite musician.
why is it that a song about sexualizing soft drinks is better than half the stuff on the radio
Cuz sexualizing soft drinks is so much less uncomfortable than the constant sexualization of humans in songs on the radio.
Person_4 summed it up great. The radio has long since become a scess pool + some sorta decent stations and bops when it comes to music
Yep it is
As someone who works retail i can assure you it’s all the stuff on the radio.
Because of shitty copyright laws.
My name is permanently on this? I regret many life decisions, this is not one of them. Great song as always.
Wait, 1 day ago?????
WAIT TIME TRAVELER
Early access that is why.
H- how just gow
@@lukiklepsa6218 i know its called a joke
idk how to explain, but the way you sing this and the way you present yourself in this video and just everything? Gender.
I am obsessed
Now this. is a kind of ad i would never skip
"So if you think we're just some obscene cannery, all our cans are over 18... CALORIES!" - UNDERRATED LINE.
So many times I was like "this is actually just a dirty jo- oh. No. It's still about cans."
He is amazing
maybe underrated, but not underage
@@DarkSoSpooky I like my wine like i love my women. Over a hundred and cooling in my basement.
@@alexs5814 I like my wine like I like my women.
I don't
This proves that Stupendium is so talented that he CAN make a song out of anything .
This was Soda-lightful.
The door is that way ->
Trash can not anymore.
Dude the Stupendium is a pop singer
As an aroace I'm very happy that this song is only about soda and nothing else. Like, there is so many songs that have some kind of romantic subcontext and it's kind of annoying.
I love this song an unhealthy amount, the can puns, the pansexual colours, the lyrics.. just everything about this is perfect.
Pansexual + Cans = Can-sexual
I swear this guy could write a song about "General Relativity" and it would somehow turn out to be another banger.
knowing stupendium...if he sees ur comment he might be up to something lol
NCR ranger, you are right
CAN WE MAKE THIS A THING XD
*salutes* o7 General Relativity!
'Well relatively speaking this relativity's speakings
is quite the language of speakings
Of intellectual teachings
By quite delectable beings
Needing a set set of meanings'
Oh god I'm envisioning it so well I'm starting to write the lyrics
Therapist: Pimpendium isn't real. He can't hurt you.
Pimpendium:
It is real, the prohecy.
I trust Pimpendium, he looks like wholesome Ron Jeremy
PIMPENDIUM *dies from aphyxeation
YOU BASTARD
I BURST OUT LAUGHING IN CLASS
TAKE MY LIKE AND THINK ABOUT THE CONSEQUENCES OF YOUR ACTIONS
The only pimp you can trust
I've not been feeling great this put a smile on my face :D
unironically the best friend ever
Am i the only one who wants to hear him make a song for Papers please?
Yes this NEEDS to happen
That would be really, really interesting. Especially considering the sad undertones the game has!
That would be amazing
Me too! If there's anyone who can make a great original song about corruption, the economy and patrotism then it's good ol' Stupendium!
He liked your comment. Prepare for wishes to come true.
Pimp Stupendium isn't real, he can't hurt you.
Pimp Stupendium:
Pimp Stupendium's presence is a slap to the face and I thank him for it.
I’d let him be my pimp
Stupimpdium
Bold of you to assume The Stupendium isn’t a pimp
Ofmg🤣
Ok but this is like my favourite song of all time for real. The innuendos, the video, the source material it’s representing, the costumes, a genuinely hilarious, delightfully unhinged, masterfully written and produced work of musical art. 10 feet pics/5 aroused cans of Pepsi Max
Sorry stupes hi ren just topped this one lmao
Still a fucking masterpiece tho
Perfect for pride month too
Stupendium made such a banger that i forgot there was a literal game named "Onlycans"
"If you enjoyed the song, please get help."
I'm afraid there's no cure for good taste.
you sure can*'t!!
If you make one more pun I will sh*tCAN you
Wait...crap
@@josuebarreragonzalez5627 it's a joke, don't be mad
@@Patch778 i know i was just joking or CAN't i?
@@josuebarreragonzalez5627 Yes, you CAN (That was cheap)
Fun fact: the word "can" is said 90 times throughout this song, and only 19 of those times are not in the 3rd verse.
oh wth
WHY?
How many times have you listened to this song ?
“Please get help”
can you stop.
I love that the cans are the colors of the pansexual flag
Two years later and no-one has topped this present for me, I don't think they ever will.
Love you lots, friend
"We can semi-guarantee that we won't be banned" is my favorite line.
Yesterday i found this song on Spotify. I never noticed it was a song about sexualized cans...holy hell. I love this.
What did you think it was then, just a normal song about soda cans???
Me too, 🤣🤣 o good person
@@Nikowo1610 YES, I'm am very dense
@@Theonea883 honestly yeah, valid
@@Theonea883 you really took the "this is a song about soft drinks and nothing else" to heart huh 😭😭
This is a literal Thirst trap…
This song has been stuck in my head for three weeks straight, and I still can’t manage to forgive you for “cansexual”.
All the rest of it, sure. But that… that line haunts me.
Edit: it’s kinda growing on me.
Now I'm just amused by the idea of them doing all this dancing in an empty, silent room in front of a green screen
No green screen on this video! ;)
i cant imagine how many times you must have cracked up while recording
@@TheStupendium ah, now it makes sense: the infinite white can-filled void is obviously the Matrix!
@@TheStupendium NO GREEN SCREEN?! That's way too impressive..!
@@TheStupendium You had cans floating? Now THAT would be impressive
I have a feeling OnlyCans is going to turn into a massive meme within the next couple of months
Meme? I think you mean most popular website
We can say we where the first
Agreed
Damn those cans look HOT
Yes. The future is bright.
I keep coming back to this because it's just so... tasteful.
how literally how does your brain work?! Such huge props def the best solid! Keep creating!
I think Stupendium is the only person who can say he's made a song around the subject of falling in love with cans
I'd argue with that but I don't think I can.
@@checkerhat327 It's hard to be cantankerous about it
Well, i decided to check OnlyCans once and chest on diet a bit.
And then I pick a can and noticed it was a diet one, 15 Kcal
Anyway, I'm locked up now :/
There may be one
*says in a dramatic deep voice
I have heard of an anime of legend with...
Can waifu's!
Akikan...*dramatic pause
It's intro or outro may have what you are looking for...
I can't remember *said in normal voice
@@elohimcabrera I don't know why I'm surprised that that's a thing.
Stupendium casually being LGBT positive is what i absolutely adore
Now it's LGBTC+
@@Victor_Graves the C is for cansexual
@@ahmedferas8333 Lesbian, Bi, Gay, Trans, C A N
And now we know their non binary!
@@L_Oeuf Wait, really??
i came back to revisit the song on youtube and just honestly love the instrumentals and singing. everything is perfect and honestly my favorite part is this 0:48 the singing here is just 👌thank you for making this!
with the amount of puns in this song bro, I feel like every undertale/underverse/deltarune fan be shaking in they boots