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INFJs: 6 Ways to Stop Overthinking Everything (Therapy Skills)
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 18 ส.ค. 2024
- In this video I discuss 6 therapy skills to help INFJs stop overthinking everything. Let's face it, as INFJs we are prone to overthinking (big time). But there is a way to stop it!
These therapy tips should be taught in elementary school but are often brand new information to adults. Thankfully, through the power of the internet, we can learn them now. I truly hope this video helps you to better your INFJ life!
Here is the link to my INFJ Circle Newsletter! Please join us!
www.theinfjcir...
** The information in this video is intended to serve as educational information and is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. All content, including text, graphics, images, and information, contained in this video is for general information purposes only and does not replace a consultation with your own doctor/therapist.
At a younger age I was overwhelmed but now I got some tricks that really help me:
1. Write down all your fears in a diary
2. Meditation
3. Nobody is perfect except God so if something is gone wrong just accept it and forgive yourself
I have a hard time forgiving myself, I realized recently that I actually haven't done that at all
I catch myself overthinking everything.Then obsessing over overthinking as unhealthy... It's not even negative thoughts, depression or mental illness. It's more like a dilemma of conflicting narratives, and which one to believe. Critical analysis is a lost art. Despite overthinking, I believe it's a good thing to consider past, present and future in any given scenario.
As an INFJ with both ADD/ADHA, most of the time I think about thinking....until I see a squirrel. Wait a min.....a BIT of an outcast?
As an INFJ I watch your videos while washing dishes in order to not overthink 😂
I am an INFJ Danish woman all my life I been trying to find out what mental disorder matches my personality.. I always thought I was wrong and different from others. I’m much emotional, over thinking, but creative and talk a lot to myself.. I was accused for being boring and jealous of people because of my staring at people.. and I’m much lonely 😢. I was so surprised when I took a personality test and find out that I was a INFJ 😮 it gave me value in myself and I see that I am just enough and good enough just as I am ☺️🤲🏼❤️ tank you for your videos.. actually I think I really could fall in love with you 😂
All so very true. The battle field is in the mind. I practice short circuiting all negative and repetitive thinking as quickly as possible. My faith teaches me that these thoughts are not from God. This is a spiritual war. Luke 12: 25-26 God bless
Gemini INFJ here - double whammy in the overthinking dept !
Virgo- INFJ overthinker 😮💨🫣
I like the words, ‘your brain likes boundaries’ not to mention ‘we are in control of our thoughts’, using gratitude or more positive thoughts to change the dialogue in the brain. As an INFJ we are future oriented and so more prone to worry about what will happen, it’s good to find tips and tricks to stay more present
I feel so relieved to hear this discussed and to get a solution. It's a very uncomfortable thing to do compulsively
Mantra's.
Thy Will (not mine) Be Done
We carry this thought with us constantly, it is the proper use of the Will.
Serenity Prayer.
Anything as a mantra.
Love, mantras, and things that keep our thoughts in order. If we don’t have our thoughts in order, we are at their mercy. Thanks for the comment!
Jay
Being an INFJ, my intuition picks up on things that create even more over thinking.
I've always been prone to over-thinking since I was a child... even about silly decisions. For example, choosing 1 ice cream flavor or whether to wear my ponytail or wear my hair down for picture day. Walking has helped me w/ my overthinking as I'm able to relax, relinquish concerns, and focus on mother nature, the rhythms of my movement while supervising our dogs. Once, I had been overwhelmed w/ options during a walk that I nearly tripped... so, this error hasn't been repeated. I learned my lesson. Now, I correlate walking w/ an opportunity to deeply contemplate, reflect, and relax but to not go overboard.
Number 3 should be shouted in capital letters! So true but so hard. I find myself slipping while doing mindless tasks like vacuuming, data entry at work, etc. when I’m doing just enough to slip out of the present without being aware of it.
Ugh. This Ni Ti loop is the most annoying part of my personality. I drive myself and others crazy. Been working on it. Great video. Today going to try not to overthink about overthinking…🤔😂
INFJs: 6 Ways to Stop Overthinking Everything (Therapy Skills)
2:11
1.
Become aware
of when you
are overthinking
3:22
2.
You can
overthink
later
4:26
3.
Control
your
thoughts
5:47
4.
Take a deep
breath, get in
the present
6:37
5.
Ask yourself
the right
kinds of
questions
7:45
6.
Don't
Overthink
about
overthinking
Because so many people have been negative to me . I do over think and it's often worse case scenario. I should relax more and let go . I cannot change when things are positive or negative . All I can do is let them happen.
Overthinking is a big part of my life, when I'm alone, when I'm not distracted, I could be overthinking. It'll build the anxiety in me and I hate being anxious, I often have to deal with the anxious feeling alone, because no one really understands it, I'd rather to keep it to myself in that case.
I will imagine the worst case scenario and what will I do if that happens, I also doesn't believe in myself, I don't think I can face it, I can't do it.
I told that to myself and want to runaway from the problems, I used to do that. I still do it now and then.
I'm trying my best to improve and take actions, I would really love to take it slow, but sometimes I feared I might be not progressing much, and I'm wasting time.
This is all very overwhelming, I think I will figure it out, eventually. :')
I'll try my best to take advices and improve this issue of mine. Thank you Jay for sharing this video! ☆
My late husband used to critically say that I think too much. I didn’t know anyone could think too much. I overthink when I go to bed. Then I have trouble getting to sleep.
Yes, thinking is good, but after the conclusion is arrived at, that’s when it can become stressful. Nighttime is one of my worst times as well. Thanks for the comment!
Jay
Whenever I start overthinking I switch it to thinking about God, Jesus and His Holy Spirit, the war that occured in heaven and the calamity that will come upon satan 😂, I think and analyse about the millennial reign of Christ, and what will be of the fallen😮. These thoughts esp of the Creator keep my mind in peace ❤. I can not stop overthinking o , so I am always switching!
Love from Nigeria ❤❤❤
I pray about it all and tell the Lord I know He is in control and that I just need to stay in my lane and trust His process. There were a couple of times that I was becoming overwhelmed and had to say out loud to myself "Be still and know that I AM God" quoting that scripture helped me stay in faith and in the present. I recently helped my 80 year old hoarding widow neighbor clear out the mess that totally consumed her space. She surprised me when I arrived to help her and she didn't feel she could be a part of the process and went to her room to lay down because it was so overwhelming to her that's how she dealt with it. I found myself so buried in someone elses stuff and overwhelmed that I had to talk to myself out loud once again to over ride the enormity of it and was saying "Don't over think it" "Stay productive" etc. It still felt good to help her get her home into a functioning state again even if it won't stay that way for long.
So... You pray to God, but He doesn't answer you...
And it's because you think you are him!!
That explains why He don't want to talk to you!!
HAVE YOU EVER TRIED TO HEAR HIM? YOU ARE JUST TALKING ALONE!!
If you really want to hear God, take that dead book and read it while speaking it's content. Then put those hints in practice. Then if you fall in grace He may speak you new hints unknown to you.
But if your heart is narcissistic, he is not going to speak to you.
Do you wish to hear or to speak to people who result nasty to you? God don't as same.
I like that you know God and belive in Him. With the whole forgive yourself thing, which I've never done, not once in my life, I realized it to be one of things I'd never be able to do but give it all to Jesus to care for just like the whole believing in yourself thing, i grew up with self-doubt to this day, so I have no idea how to be confident about something, so as a Child of God, I'm looking forward to God's confidence instead
I also have found talking to our self out loud helps. It’s like your manager you talks to your worried you. Try it ❤
Great tip, I agree. Talking to yourself is a great way to externalize things. Kind of like writing them in the journal. Thanks for watching!
Jay
❤ thank you perfect timing
You are welcome!
Jay
I love this channel... when I watched the videos for the first time I didn't realize much but lately I could understand things a lot and the videos helped me a lot 🤍. Like I could detect narcissist abuse , stop myself from giving free therapy , stop feeling overwhelmed by intuitions , be proud of myself .... thanks a lot.. keep up the good work🥰🥰🥰
This is awesome! So glad the channel is helping you and I plan to keep going. Thanks for letting me know!
Jay
Good advice. It can be frustrating when we don't get things perfect right away. I'll add that holding on to our reality can help, building self trust and self compassion, one small step at a time. Looking forward to the next videos!
Thank you, my friend!
Jay
I used to overthink alot Until I now recognize when I am an immediately check myself,I hold the saying except the things I cannot change an have courage to change the things I can. I have faith that everything is meant to help me not hurt me. Having faith an trusting in God, 🙏🙏🙏
This is what it’s all about, realizing when you’re overthinking, when to take action, and when to let go!
Jay
I ended up here by accident, trying to distract myself from overthinking. I am so grateful that I did ❤ Bookmarking this video to watch again! I might have cried too much of relief and missed half of the video 😅🥹. You have a new subscriber! Thank you ✨
Again, this vid was spot on. This week has been of overthinking. Setting a time and limiting the time to think was a GREAT idea. I find that if i can step away even for a little while, it all seems less worrisome. YES, we are in control of our own thoughts. I have used that at night many times; "there is nothing I can do tonight, I will think about it again in the morning." And it is usually much better. You are the BEST at explaining and offering real advise. Glad you are here and I found you.
That means a lot to me Joe, thanks so much and I’m glad the video helped you. Also, glad you’re using some of the techniques.. Being aware that we can control our thoughts is such a game changer. Thanks for the comment!
Jay
You seem like a genuine supportive soul and I wish you all the best.
Thank you, I truly appreciate that. 🙏
Jay
Music helps me incredibly with this. Positive upbeat only.
Recent job interview - there’s nothing worse (except maybe a date). Made myself sick in the week leading up to it, and now I’m in INFJ-T hell. Physical pain and tears. I did great, until I ran out of steam, then it got awkward. I wish I could escape to a sunny iceberg for a month.
Very helpful. I find that the reason I overthink is that if I work out the possible outcomes, I won't have to worry about them anymore or maybe be more prepared for any outcome. Yeah. It doesn't really work very well. Thanks for your videos.
This
Yes 100% this and it doesn’t work.
Part of my overthinking I call my optimistic pessimism I hope for the best but prepare for the worst! I will always figure out the worst case scenario and how to deal with it but always hope for the best outcome
I am definitely prone to overthinking. I believe many times it comes down to my personal guilt around not feeling prepared to understand what can happen when a big decision or serious/important situation happens. I'm usually guilty of avoiding tackling or even being informed of what can happen in these scenarios. I've also been burned in the past/blindsided by bad news. Like in your scenario at the beginning of the video, my outcome was at the time pretty much my worst fears realized. I still do this now but the only thing that seems to help is to do the homework and at least know what the possible outcomes are of an important scenario before I'm faced with it. At least then I know what to expect if things don't go my way.
Jay.what you say / describe here is so accurate for me too.... always over thinking, which often ends in anxiety and worry. Logically I tell myself to be more relaxed but it is not easy to master.
I shall carry out your suggestions re overthinking. Thanks Jay. Mike.
I’ve done this before during a period of intense anxiety/OCD loop I was stuck in at the time. It worked really well. Setting worry time and boundaries. I still struggle with anxiety, but I’m learning and growing so much.
As an INFJ ,this is so true ...
Once i was traveling in a van amd the driver get off the van for some reason and my mind was thing what if i jump on his seat, start the van,we collide with a truck and boom😂😂😂😂
My aunt gave me her little daugter to carry her and my mind was imagining her falling on the ground even before just carrying her😂😂😂😂😂😂
Truly overthinking of INFJs sucksssssss.....
But thanks for such informative video ...❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤this channel makes me feel like we all are family 🥰
O-M-G 🤭 😂😂😂😂😂 I thought I'm the creepiest to have such thoughts 😂😂😂😂😂
@@bongzsnoochy4712 we all INFJ are in the same shoe😆😆😆😆😆
@@user-ayesha97 I'm all the more fueled rather 😂😂😂😂
@@bongzsnoochy4712 😆😆😆😆😆😆
Thank you Jay for your videos, an enlightening understanding of the one of a kind INFJ.
Finally a definition to my identity.
Back when I was growing up this newer way of understanding, thinking and beliefs didn’t exist. I have always approached events with such a deeper thought causing much undue stress. I was always told simply not worry so much about my concerns and fears. This advice never worked I just continued to worry even more.
I truly find peace and tranquility in spending much of my time living in a more solitary environment. Most
of my hobbies and pastimes are solitary in nature, I feel grounded and happy. True, you do need to get out and socialize, it’s for your own mental and physical health… balance.
A sigh of relief to know I am not the only “unique” person in this world and I can inch forward in life with a better understanding of my individuality. Cheers👏 to all the INFJ’s.
If there was any competition for overthinkers I would take the first place 🥇 for sure! 😂
This hits home 😢
I wake up in the middle of the night and then start over thinking....I get up make a herbal tea and normally go back to sleep ....distraction is the key:) I am a infj with adhd
Awww dear, I don't know what I'd do in that situation, maybe it'd get worse when it wakes me up at night. Just needs more patient in order to work on these things that Jay mentioned, work it out and do it patiently. For me, doing all that Jay mentioned, I'm a notewriter person and yet I'd not use it for a few days, even though my reason to install the notepad I liked was to use it daily to keep track of my mood, feelings and stuff. I even have a spot somewhere around the yard at home where I'd sit and talk to Jesus about stuff and yes I do feel a lil bit better afterwards but I'd still feel like that ain't nothing. So it needs time, extra patience to work on such things. I'm not saying this just coz I've worked it out, na, I'm still as stuck as you are, but since we're all go through same stuff, it helps to encourage one another and knowing that someone somewhere like you, is also fighting to make that change for the better, is motivation on it's own. Hope you be successful in what you do and be better 😊
I ruminate a lot especially when I'm in the midst of other types, and it'd start right at that place and of course we'd be talking and everything, so I get distracted until I'm finally home and in my space that I will resume where I left off 🤦🏽♀️
These videos have been so helpful! I live with cptsd, which I’m sure many of us do. Watching your videos I can see how this issue has contributed to my becoming an infj. But looking at it from the perspective of infj instead of cptsd has caused a great shift that is positive and productive. I’m not saying I should ignore the cptsd part (it 100% needs to be dealt with on the deepest possible level), but just approaching my odd ways from a more positive angle helps me climb out of the pit and stay out.
I’m glad the videos are helping you to see things from different angles. Thanks for watching!
Jay
What does the cptsd stands for?
Thank you, it helps a lot. It works.
You’re welcome!
Jay
Thank you so much for this beautiful video!!!
You are very welcome!
Jay
That boss is a narcassist to not give a clue.
I love your solution of writing it down, and I know from experience that this works for me. I will call it my rumination diary, lol. Thanks for this very timely help. Last night I spent several hours lying awake while ruminating over a work-related conversation with a co-worker. In the moment, I was unsure of the answer to her question. I felt that made me look bad and stupid. I clearly knew the answer but just had to think on it a while. However, I was pretty sure she did not want to hear about it at 1:00 a.m.🤣
It's just so silly to waste time replaying the tapes of the past, but it is very helpful knowing it's not just me.
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
I was wondering if any other INFJs are sensitive to words like myself. Even if my mind says i know they are joking/kidding with me, or being sarcastic it still makes me upset. That goes for positive stuff as well. It can make me happy even when someone is blowin smoke up my arse. Is this an INFJ thing or just a me thing? These things can definitely send me into overthinking
Yes, i Have such feelings As well, we May simply analyse others talking in a different way with more sensitive interpretation of even singular words, gestures, Tone od thé voice etc.
@@user-xd9bb3df4l Thanks for your input. Bless you
Nope you're not only one, I'm like that too 😂
Yes it sounds very familiar
But in my case it has a lot to do with this being a survival mechanism that has been very much needed throughout my life but yes over all I would benefit from taking a break from the catastrophe thinking
Helpful thanks. Will have to come back and watch it again.
I’m good with stop thoughts and have skills but great to learn more.
It’s got to become a lifestyle.
I started off in many ways but when I started, one of the things that was useful was listening to guided meditation.
Helped straighten out your thoughts without any effort and you got to relax.
All my best regards,
Saving this video:)
Glad this helped you! Yeah, it’s a process and it’s like weeding your garden. You have to do it daily. Thanks for the comment!
Jay
Why questions. That was interesting because it’s almost like generalizing.
You don’t always this or that.
The boss one was future thing and catastrophe thinking.
I like ask your self questions to get into action.
I do inner and outer control and emotional thinking and are we minimizing something and maximizing something else.
I watch out for should could would.
What’s the evidence behind your thoughts.
I notice worrying comes most often around people with a disorder because you’re kind of babysitting them incase any of there delusions play out and harm you.
I’m so excited you have me practicing a new skill… when do we worry.
My favorite that I do when I don’t feel like doing something is changing the narrative and visualizing what I have to do.
I like how you said don’t get caught up in not doing a lot. At least you’re trying.
When I get on a role and get to fast is the only thing that I haven’t put anything in place for myself… we’ll watch where my energy goes. That is what helps me.
I actually went to fast in life just because I could. Just because I picked up great attitudes.
Lots have changed since…
You’re welcome and your right it’s a daily thing like ground yourself. I look at four things, feel or listen for three then two.
I can’t remember the technique but works anyway.
All my best!
Jen
Asking yourself questions is one of the best ways to get yourself motivated and finding solutions. I like to ask, what can I do to help other INFJ’s? Or what can I do to make this business grow? Those are action oriented. But asking yourself why you’re a loser, or why you always fail, is bad. If you ask, why am I always so good at this? That would be an example a why question that would work out well for you! But for those purposes, I prefer thinking things like I am an action taker. Or, one of my favorites, I cannot fail, I can only learn and grow. Thanks for the comment!
Jay
I can automatically see the difference between the way of thinking.
So important to choose your words wisely.
I just got from learning from some mistakes.
Trying to remember what made me so effective before and it absolutely was because I chose my narrative carefully and filtered through thoughts easily.
I burnt out because I was around people making me jump through hoops for them.
I won’t do that again. New skill EARNED!!
Writing probably was helped so much now that I think of it. Helps stumble you when you’re on a roll.
That was when I was around difficult people. Like start off a response and you have to take accountability in it then ended up with something assertive to say.
I can look at it as people to practice my assertiveness with as opposed to what a drag!
Helpers a long life:)
Thank you very much.
You are welcome!
Jay
Thank you : )
I get really p!ssed at being told I over think. Its rude and disrespectful. I am a slow thinker/slow processer and need to be alone to do this. I wish I had a good come back for the accusers.
😂😂😂😂😂
God can take away overthinking ❤❤❤
Are you a child of God? 😊
Na. I can tell what my boss will say the moment I lay my eyes on him. But yeah, before that, I'd definitely be running circles in my head.
Oh my 🤭 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂
Infj with adhd here 🤚
When I'm in overthinking fase. I try to switch it to over think at one social problems or something witche needs an improvement. So gave the feed to my brain, to that crave, to get obsessed on something, but in a constructive way.
Yes, try to switch it to something constructive. If you can’t take any more action on it at the moment, then it just causes you stress for no reason. Thanks for watching!
Jay
How can an INFJ lose the stupid look?????? I go out to got something to think about.
Hey The INFJ Circle!..
I've been thinking about it for a while. I wanna share my thoughts with you all.
Aam.. what if we all INFJs gather as a group? We can change the world together. It's always suffering when we try to fix things all by ourselves. And in the end, we sacrifice our lives...
So I'm thinking... What if we work as a group?
1. We can help and guide the world.
2. If we are misunderstood or we need to get healed, we can heal or hear each other. We can be there for each other. Cause other personality types misunderstands us in the end.
We can break the curse together. We can't remove the deep darkness with our shallow lights. The darkness will hide us.. it'll take our lights away as always. So let's gather together and become a big light... To protect the world..
I'll be looking forward to your replies.
Great idea
He said IF you have someone in your life you can trust. Only GOD amighty
We overthink overthinking.😂
When am I overthinking , umm, let me think about that 😊
lol!
Jay
I am an INFJ. I was dx Autistic. Am I the only INFJ on the spectrum or are there many others out there?
@rick3747 and @FFF-123, you are not alone.
my pet cat is such a inj
Boost
As about thouths control, I have heard this one from Yuval Noah Harari on YT: you give command to your onw brain: "give me antother though!"
You say I think too much? U might be right, but I think you don’t think enough. You think I’m right?
I thought everyone did that.
🙏🏾
Are a lot of INFJ's autistic? I think I have ASD1 (Aspergers). Just curious about this.
Not possible
God can take away you anxiety and depression! Believe in him ❤❤❤
I totally understand you on this language you're speaking (if you know what i mean 😉)
How do I sign up for your newsletter?
The link is in the description below the video! Would love to have you on board.
Jay
Do you have an Instagram? I just signed up for your newsletter. Trying to get you in front of my face as much as possible haha!
Thanks! Just started one today - give me a minute to get the content flowing. instagram.com/theinfjcircle/
Overthinking is a friend, not a foe 😂, but we might not need to see this friend so regularly 😂