As a spouse how do you NOT take it personal when he continues to get further and further away from our marriage. He has been for over 3 long years very selfish, distant, and the only thing that has been on his mind is making other people happy. (Including himself). How long can a wife be supportive and "help" him transition through without feeling like why am I even here. When you say its not about "me" than why is all the negative affecting "me". 3 years in is getting really old. He won't communicate cause then I'm the negative. After 30 years of being together I know I'm not the shiny new penny but neither is he. (He is 10 years older) Taking care of myself is coming to the realization the longer he stays in his midlife the more I want out of his life. Thats a part of the oxygen for myself. Oh forgot to mention this is round 2 of midlife crisis, grand total of at least 14 years.
Connie Petersen, that sounds like a long time to be going through a midlife crisis. You may consider some coaching to get clear on what you want and your options. It is tough to have a fulfilling marriage without communication.
@@LiveOnPurposeTV Thank you for responding, its been a long battle. I just want the drama to be done with so we can move on with this chapter and just grow old together. However you are right, no communication is a battle. I'm in therapy and I think he would benefit from it also. Its just not of importance to him, since he feels we have no problems. (Denial)
This sounds all to familiar . Sometimes advice is good but doesn’t always work for everyone going through it . I’ve been a punching bag tossed to side by my spouse for a little over 2 years . It’s hurtful and exhausting. It’s like waiting for him ... that’s if he ever returns to himself again and realize that We belong together Bc it’s already been 21 years! It’s hard to be positive when you don’t matter and are labeled as the problem. I am currently trying to seek therapy Bc this marriage is consuming my energy and life. One day I’m okay out and about doing me, next I’m alone and crying .
I'm 38 and I'm going through a terrible one right now but I think a lot of its purpose I'm not really worried about death I've got finances that are pretty decent for a single guy. But I want to know why God put me on this planet and I pleaded with him let me know
Mine became someone else I didn’t recognize. 20 years of marriage and he decided to start partying like he was in his 20’s from drugs to hanging with very shady characters. He became extremely disrespectful towards me in and outside of the house which then escalated to him getting physical. I took my 3 kids and I shut that door forever. He became self absorbed without a shred of empathy for anyone. He has spun out of control since then even more.
@@ealeem8986 I’m going through this right now. I think my partner (we’re not married but have been together for 12 years and he suddenly wants space), he just turned 40, and there’s a girl he’s been flirting with. 2 weeks ago he said basically in a nutshell, “you’re not good enough and I want my own space.” This girl he’s been talking to, going on dates w found out about me and contacted me! She’s in her 20s too and a feminist like me, so we’ve secretly been talking and she told me EVERYTHING! He lied to her about his age, about me etc etc. Yesterday she told the HR woman what was going on to protect herself and job and it got around back to him. He started blaming me for all of it🙄He’s literally crazy and I don’t even recognize who he is. He’s acting like a 25 year old, drinking etc. Night and day difference from the stoic man I once knew. It’s like he had a “matrix” moment one day. I don’t know what to do.
Men are easy. To help him deal with his "Midlife Crisis" or the New Age term "Awakening", you have to hyper focus on yourself. The only chance you have is to make yourself as healthy and hot as you possibly can. If you have given up on yourself then he probably has too. Get in the gym, make yourself hot, ignore him, live an exciting life and maybe you will prevent the almost certainty of the end of your relationship. When the woman goes through Midlife Crisis...........Good luck.
My other half has just got a sports car. Our daughter hates it, our dog hates it and so do I. I offered to sit in the back because it is so uncomfortable. He had to literally drag me out of the car, because I could not get out. Good job I am on a Plant Based Diet. We need a family car. One that out daughter can enjoy and be comfortable. A car with four doors not two. Because our puppy likes to stick his head out the window, which does not exist with this car. Let's face it. Some men are just selfish 😭😂🤣
Yes!!! My other half got 9 sports cars in the past 7 months! He said he always loved sports cars now he finally has an opportunity to collect them. Orange, neon blue colors, bright green colors. I didn’t realize it was a midlife crisis until he became more selfish and rude, more distant :( So sad :(
Hey, seriously take it from me, it’s ok for you to not like it, but just thank god he didn’t say “you’re not good enough” and start trying to date a 28 yr old who then called you, to tell u everything and THEN told HR at their work to try and get him fired 😬 I wanna laugh but it literally heartbreaking bc I can see his crash course a mile away. His paycheck effects ALL of us. Wish us luck, pray for us.
What to do if my dad tells my mom he regrets not meeting more women in his past? Or that he just wants to "explore" so to speak? Is there something we can do or will it just resolve on it's own? It's kind of really hard to listen to, both as their child and for my mom, and to be fair I'm kind of mad about how selfishly he behaves.
It doesn't sound like he is behaving in a mature way. It really isn't your issue and I hope your dad gets some help before he makes decisions he will regret later.
What if he suddenly ended the relationship with you after a fight then kept himself some time to think and come back to tell you he seems to have MLC and he can't have a girlfriend now, saying he has a lot of problems in his life now and he wants all his time for himself (also has a son). I'm so hurt he loved me so much all in a sudden he said he doesn't feel love for me, but still has feeling. Should I tell me I am willing to be there to support him? Even if he needs his time for his focus
Nature is cruel. When plants die they often go to seed. I noticed that my husband wanted to hang out with younger women like strippers and prostitutes who are fertile. Nature was cruel also in that he had had a heart attack and couldn’t do much but that didn’t stop him from throwing money and time at them that he didn’t give to us (wife of 34 years and our adult children). His mid life crisis turned into his end of life crisis because he died January 11, 2020. My psychiatrist friend said that happens a lot. So if you love him call him every day and see if he is okay. I told him those whores were not his friends and things like that and at least he died knowing that I tried to help him. He was only 61 years old. It was so strange as if he was mentally ill that I think another hormone kicks in and makes them this way; perhaps a death hormone. He was like an addict. His only way to get over it was rehab, prison or death and it was death. Death was the only way he could come home and I think he knew it and gave in.
I’m having this issue, but the other way around. My co worker has mid life crisis but he’s infatuated with me and I’m in my 20s. I try to not talk to him, but he’s trying to get closer and closer to me. I don’t think it’s fair for his wife. What should I do?
inserter400, I am sorry to hear this. I appreciate you watching and trying to keep your marriage intact. We do have some other videos that you might find relevant on the Positive Relationship Resources playlist: th-cam.com/play/PLq2mRDkHEBPA410uJ9woXx9B9WiPyM7fX.html For more personalized help, we also have a free 25 minute call with one of our Live On Purpose coaches. If that sounds interesting to you, go here to schedule: DrPaulJenkins.com/breakthroughcall
i am holding on but no matter how much i do to support her or give her space she is still filing for divorce . anything i can do reconnect with my wife and avoid a divorce ?
inserter400, while I am a very positive person, I also understand what I have control over and what I don't. If your wife wants the divorce, you may not be able to change her mind.
Lol love your humour. Brilliant. 🤣😂😭 Our daughters Dad just brought a stupid sports car. He was thinking about him. And only him. Cares not that the back seats are tiny and uncomfortable. My daughter hates it, and so does our dog. Doodle had no window to hang his fluffy head out of. I sat in the back, because our daughter could not stand being in the back. Her Dad had to drag me out of the back. Let's face it some men are selfish.
Many women love to say that men are having a mid life crisis when they go off and do what they have putting off for years like hobbies or new adventures. There’s no such thing. It’s just a convenient term used by many women to keep men in their place. Have you noticed that women don’t call it a midlife crisis when they go through the same thing?
Yes I do call it a mid life crisis for me too. I started studying. My (now ex) husband found another partner. Same feelings, different ways to act on it.
Our mid life change is a physiological condition called menopause. However, in our mid life transition, we tend not to have affairs, buy sports cars, get hair implants, take Viagra and run after young women trying to regain our youth and stave off death.
I'm currently going through menopause. I'm trying to keep in shape & grow mentally/emotionally. My husband is dragging me through his MID LIFE CRISIS! I've given him everything for almost 30 years but it's never enough. It doesn't matter that I've rocked his world all that time...he wants more.
Once you come to terms with mortality, you find peace and acceptance.. personally, I’m thankful it doesn’t last forever! Love your channel :)
Glynis84, enjoy the moment and where you are and don't worry about the future.
I’m not sure that I can take a few years of this “I’m not satisfied with anything and drinking a lot again and being an A hole.
Terri Johnston, I hope you can get some clarity on this. If you need a coach, we have some available to help. www.drpauljenkins.com/breakthroughcall.
As a spouse how do you NOT take it personal when he continues to get further and further away from our marriage. He has been for over 3 long years very selfish, distant, and the only thing that has been on his mind is making other people happy. (Including himself). How long can a wife be supportive and "help" him transition through without feeling like why am I even here. When you say its not about "me" than why is all the negative affecting "me". 3 years in is getting really old. He won't communicate cause then I'm the negative. After 30 years of being together I know I'm not the shiny new penny but neither is he. (He is 10 years older) Taking care of myself is coming to the realization the longer he stays in his midlife the more I want out of his life. Thats a part of the oxygen for myself. Oh forgot to mention this is round 2 of midlife crisis, grand total of at least 14 years.
Connie Petersen, that sounds like a long time to be going through a midlife crisis. You may consider some coaching to get clear on what you want and your options. It is tough to have a fulfilling marriage without communication.
@@LiveOnPurposeTV Thank you for responding, its been a long battle. I just want the drama to be done with so we can move on with this chapter and just grow old together. However you are right, no communication is a battle. I'm in therapy and I think he would benefit from it also. Its just not of importance to him, since he feels we have no problems. (Denial)
This sounds all to familiar . Sometimes advice is good but doesn’t always work for everyone going through it . I’ve been a punching bag tossed to side by my spouse for a little over 2 years . It’s hurtful and exhausting. It’s like waiting for him ... that’s if he ever returns to himself again and realize that We belong together Bc it’s already been 21 years! It’s hard to be positive when you don’t matter and are labeled as the problem. I am currently trying to seek therapy Bc this marriage is consuming my energy and life. One day I’m okay out and about doing me, next I’m alone and crying .
Do you need help? I know of a powerful prophet who can help you.
WhatsApp him
It's a sad thing for the spouse to go through and those that have been left behind without really knowing what happened.
Stefany Dower, it can be very sad. I hope we can pick up the pieces and made a life through living on purpose.
I'm 38 and I'm going through a terrible one right now but I think a lot of its purpose I'm not really worried about death I've got finances that are pretty decent for a single guy. But I want to know why God put me on this planet and I pleaded with him let me know
Keep asking and looking, there are answers.
Dr. Paul your twin sister turned 53?? 🤔 you must have been born 10 years after her 🤪
Janet Spiteri, how did you know? Haha. She won't appreciate that.
@@LiveOnPurposeTV if she's anything like you she'd appreciate the joke and possibly insist that technically you were born first 😜
Just kidding!! 😁
Mine became someone else I didn’t recognize. 20 years of marriage and he decided to start partying like he was in his 20’s from drugs to hanging with very shady characters. He became extremely disrespectful towards me in and outside of the house which then escalated to him getting physical. I took my 3 kids and I shut that door forever. He became self absorbed without a shred of empathy for anyone. He has spun out of control since then even more.
Dorothy Abed, how sad.
I'm in the same boat as you are. I have three children. It makes me sick to see him acts like he's in his 20s, when he's already 41.
@@ealeem8986 I’m going through this right now. I think my partner (we’re not married but have been together for 12 years and he suddenly wants space), he just turned 40, and there’s a girl he’s been flirting with. 2 weeks ago he said basically in a nutshell, “you’re not good enough and I want my own space.” This girl he’s been talking to, going on dates w found out about me and contacted me! She’s in her 20s too and a feminist like me, so we’ve secretly been talking and she told me EVERYTHING! He lied to her about his age, about me etc etc. Yesterday she told the HR woman what was going on to protect herself and job and it got around back to him. He started blaming me for all of it🙄He’s literally crazy and I don’t even recognize who he is. He’s acting like a 25 year old, drinking etc. Night and day difference from the stoic man I once knew. It’s like he had a “matrix” moment one day. I don’t know what to do.
More like mid 30's and realizing agism is real.
deamondoll, yes, it is real, unfortunately.
Men are easy. To help him deal with his "Midlife Crisis" or the New Age term "Awakening", you have to hyper focus on yourself. The only chance you have is to make yourself as healthy and hot as you possibly can. If you have given up on yourself then he probably has too. Get in the gym, make yourself hot, ignore him, live an exciting life and maybe you will prevent the almost certainty of the end of your relationship. When the woman goes through Midlife Crisis...........Good luck.
Mark Burch, thank you for watching and commenting.
Men are far from easy and it sounds like you're not speaking from experience in having a husband go through years of crisis. It is not that simple.
DON'T TAKE IT TOO PERSONALLY!!!
My New Motto during this hard phrase.. Thank you Dr. Paul glad I saw your video.. by mistake..best mistake 😃
So happy you found us, snowflake. Honored to have you at Live On Purpose TV.
My other half has just got a sports car. Our daughter hates it, our dog hates it and so do I. I offered to sit in the back because it is so uncomfortable. He had to literally drag me out of the car, because I could not get out. Good job I am on a Plant Based Diet.
We need a family car. One that out daughter can enjoy and be comfortable. A car with four doors not two. Because our puppy likes to stick his head out the window, which does not exist with this car.
Let's face it. Some men are just selfish 😭😂🤣
Butterfly Lullaby, people can be selfish. I hope your husband realizes this wasn't the best purchase and changes it soon.
Yes!!! My other half got 9 sports cars in the past 7 months! He said he always loved sports cars now he finally has an opportunity to collect them. Orange, neon blue colors, bright green colors. I didn’t realize it was a midlife crisis until he became more selfish and rude, more distant :( So sad :(
Hey, seriously take it from me, it’s ok for you to not like it, but just thank god he didn’t say “you’re not good enough” and start trying to date a 28 yr old who then called you, to tell u everything and THEN told HR at their work to try and get him fired 😬 I wanna laugh but it literally heartbreaking bc I can see his crash course a mile away. His paycheck effects ALL of us. Wish us luck, pray for us.
What to do if my dad tells my mom he regrets not meeting more women in his past? Or that he just wants to "explore" so to speak? Is there something we can do or will it just resolve on it's own? It's kind of really hard to listen to, both as their child and for my mom, and to be fair I'm kind of mad about how selfishly he behaves.
It doesn't sound like he is behaving in a mature way. It really isn't your issue and I hope your dad gets some help before he makes decisions he will regret later.
What if he suddenly ended the relationship with you after a fight then kept himself some time to think and come back to tell you he seems to have MLC and he can't have a girlfriend now, saying he has a lot of problems in his life now and he wants all his time for himself (also has a son). I'm so hurt he loved me so much all in a sudden he said he doesn't feel love for me, but still has feeling. Should I tell me I am willing to be there to support him? Even if he needs his time for his focus
Cat Riot, you will have to decide what you want and if you are willing to give him time or not. Your choice.
Nature is cruel. When plants die they often go to seed. I noticed that my husband wanted to hang out with younger women like strippers and prostitutes who are fertile. Nature was cruel also in that he had had a heart attack and couldn’t do much but that didn’t stop him from throwing money and time at them that he didn’t give to us (wife of 34 years and our adult children).
His mid life crisis turned into his end of life crisis because he died January 11, 2020. My psychiatrist friend said that happens a lot.
So if you love him call him every day and see if he is okay. I told him those whores were not his friends and things like that and at least he died knowing that I tried to help him. He was only 61 years old.
It was so strange as if he was mentally ill that I think another hormone kicks in and makes them this way; perhaps a death hormone. He was like an addict. His only way to get over it was rehab, prison or death and it was death.
Death was the only way he could come home and I think he knew it and gave in.
Lillie Knight, I am sorry it turned out like this for you. Thanks for watching and commenting.
I’m having this issue, but the other way around. My co worker has mid life crisis but he’s infatuated with me and I’m in my 20s. I try to not talk to him, but he’s trying to get closer and closer to me. I don’t think it’s fair for his wife. What should I do?
AA A, tell him that you are not interested. Do not associate with him outside of work and if he is inappropriate, tell management.
I AM HAVING TROUBLE COPING WITH MY WIFES MIDLIFE CRISIS. SHE NOW WANTS A DIVORCE
inserter400, I am sorry to hear this. I appreciate you watching and trying to keep your marriage intact. We do have some other videos that you might find relevant on the Positive Relationship Resources playlist: th-cam.com/play/PLq2mRDkHEBPA410uJ9woXx9B9WiPyM7fX.html
For more personalized help, we also have a free 25 minute call with one of our Live On Purpose coaches. If that sounds interesting to you, go here to schedule: DrPaulJenkins.com/breakthroughcall
@@LiveOnPurposeTV THANK YOU , YOUR VERY KIND . I WILL PHONE NEXT WEEK
I'm in the same boat and feel lost. She say it's not that but have all the signs
You are doing such great things for humanity. Thank you!
d k, thank you for being a part of our community.
It’s just exhausted to deal with those 49 men crisis😢
I get it.
i am holding on but no matter how much i do to support her or give her space she is still filing for divorce . anything i can do reconnect with my wife and avoid a divorce ?
inserter400, while I am a very positive person, I also understand what I have control over and what I don't. If your wife wants the divorce, you may not be able to change her mind.
I’m in the same place. My husband is done with me.
Do you need help? I know of a powerful prophet who can help you to make things work out.
WhatsApp him
+2⃣3⃣4⃣7⃣0⃣4⃣1⃣1⃣2⃣6⃣4⃣8⃣5⃣
I had mine at 29. I was way ahead of the curve .. I'm late 40s now.
Thank you for sharing.
TIL that I've been having a midlife crisis since I was 14
Jon Snowver, you didn't say how old you are. Sounds like it might be chronic in your situation.
😂🤣😂 “sorry to burst that bubble for you.” You are such a classic. Absolutely love your channel. Thank you for being a part of my team.
Steve Omomen, we are glad to have you at Live On Purpose TV.
I just want to say that this helped me more then any article I have came across
Thank you, I wish you and your husband a very Happy New Year.
Great video 🥰and your right, a sense of humour is the best thing to have❤️
Sarah Brennan, it has seen me through many a parenting trial.
Live On Purpose TV a very true word said lol 😆🥰
Dr paul, how do I deal with my dads midlife crisis.
thanks!
Divorce him and start dating
Yvette Nunez, that is an option.
Lol love your humour. Brilliant. 🤣😂😭
Our daughters Dad just brought a stupid sports car. He was thinking about him. And only him. Cares not that the back seats are tiny and uncomfortable. My daughter hates it, and so does our dog.
Doodle had no window to hang his fluffy head out of.
I sat in the back, because our daughter could not stand being in the back. Her Dad had to drag me out of the back.
Let's face it some men are selfish.
Thank you so much, my heart needed this
amanda travis, you are welcome.
if he denies midlife crisis what then?
Lisa Otruba, you get to decide what then, for you and for the relationship. It might be a good time to talk to someone, like a coach.
Love this channel, so much great advice on here!
Hip Mama, thanks. Glad you are finding the videos helpful.
Thank you for this!
My pleasure!
Many women love to say that men are having a mid life crisis when they go off and do what they have putting off for years like hobbies or new adventures. There’s no such thing. It’s just a convenient term used by many women to keep men in their place. Have you noticed that women don’t call it a midlife crisis when they go through the same thing?
David Arbelaez
I agree with you here!
Yes I do call it a mid life crisis for me too. I started studying. My (now ex) husband found another partner. Same feelings, different ways to act on it.
David Arbelaez, I guess it doesn't matter what we call it. Hopefully we can get through it together.
Our mid life change is a physiological condition called menopause. However, in our mid life transition, we tend not to have affairs, buy sports cars, get hair implants, take Viagra and run after young women trying to regain our youth and stave off death.
I'm currently going through menopause. I'm trying to keep in shape & grow mentally/emotionally. My husband is dragging me through his MID LIFE CRISIS! I've given him everything for almost 30 years but it's never enough. It doesn't matter that I've rocked his world all that time...he wants more.