my mother was an under age hippie pregnant with me in 1969 and kept me for 2 years then gave me up for adoption I had abandonment issues. my adopted parents didn't know what was wrong with me. father was abusive and mom was alcoholic. I had to forgive all of them to get sober. I an 48 now and free of hate thanks to aa.
Good that you were finally able to break the cycle. Abusive childhoods can be generational curses flowing from the parents to the children and on and on if the cycle isn't broken.
Lenora Holland , flashbacks of childhood sexual molestation came back to me in my 50s. I wound up having a severe mental break and had 28 electric shock treatments. Abuse is a killer.
As a mum i just wanted to time warp and scoop up the little boy in you and hug him and mother him ...tuck you in bake cookies bless my babies i know monster mothers like that its appaling. You have matured into an intellegent aware man not broken by blows but strengthened .thankyou for sharing your insite ...its not always "normal" or ok...
It breaks my heart to know this goes on daily. It’s Soooo sad & horrific what you and other children have to go through. I hope & pray you find healing and peace. Thank you for sharing your story. Love & blessings
OMG! This is almost a blueprint of my childhood. I managed to avoid most of the ‘beatings’, by being a good girl. My sister was much more wilful than me, so received regular beatings. For me, it was ‘everything is your fault’. My fault she was sad, my fault she was angry, my fault when she banged her head on her car door! I used to believe she was watching me. I thought she recorded me through those buttons. It made me so scared. I always assumed it was just me, as anyone I have ever told, just looked at me like I was mad! This is the first time ever I have heard the same sort of thing! She also taught us that the whole of life is ‘hell’, that only we die can we go to heaven. I am 54, she has been dead for a decade. When she died, my only emotion was joy at finally being free! So, thank you so, so much, for sharing that. xxx
Lots of people have been through similar circumstances and never realized it because they never heard anyone else talk about it, (at least not anyone who still had most of their screws intact)! It's easy for me to talk about it because it doesn't bother me anymore, so I figure it would help a few others out if I did.
it made us stronger i was the black sheep my brothers were well clothed and fed but not me my brothers got it because they were older my sisters because they were girls always. the evil logic of that i hated and suffered from all my young life anything broken lost or taken was my fault it was never me but had to take the beatings both my parents are gone now but like you no tears for them i like you have never spoken of it to any one some of the stuff i will never mention to any one ever i felt relief at there passing
My mother played some of those games too. I did the laundry and somehow a navy t shirt got into the whites. I was so afraid and got beat mightily for that. Spent most of my life thinking I must be crazy, because I would never have allowed a navy item to go in a white load. One day about 10 years ago, the family was remiscing and my mom said "remember that time I put the navy t shirt in the white load?" And laughed! I am 59. I spent most of my life thinking I was crazy! What I have learned, is that some things from an abusive past will affect you always. No one "gets over it". I'm sorry you also lived thru abuse.
Completely relate to what you went through. My mom was a single mother, she worked, had lots of boyfriends, drank a lot and was always gone. She was abusive in different ways than your mom. Been in and out of therapy most of my life. Left home at 16. Started working at 13 (lied about my age) save every penny and got the hell out. Moved to New Mexico and built myself a great life.
@@CoffeeTalkLive My childhood was a living hell!! Everything was my fault as well!! I was the reason for her unhappy life! So I got punished for it! She used my sexual abuse to get what she wanted from my Father! So dysfunctional! I was watched, I was followed, I was humiliated in front of others! Just anything to make my life miserable. She locked herself in her bedroom and said she was going to kill herself because I went on a date! So I was the REASON she wanted to kill herself! If I got sick she said it was God's way of punishing me for being a bad daughter! She went thru my dirty clothes, especially my underwear t o see if I was being a bad girl with boys during school! She beat me one time in front of my father, humiliating me because I bled in my underwear from my period! I almost had a nervous breakdown at 17! I was locked out of the house and didn't know if I was going to let in the house! She had a gun with her at all times! Her purse! Her nightstand and I thought she would blow my brains out at night! She threatened to cut my hair off in my sleep! I had very long hair! My father threatened to cut my nails off while I slept! This poor man I feel so sorry for and can identify with him! My mother said, she knew EVERYTHING I did when not in her sight and I was terrified of her and at the time my whole family was, but I didn't know that! They just didn't CONFRONT it! That's WHY I never told about my sexual abuse by my Father! What a miserable life we go thru! So sad! Many people know and don't give a shit! It breaks my heart to hear this man! I can so identify and my heart goes out to him!
@@RubySlippers1100 I hope your able to have a fresh start with the going through being abused by both of your parents and not being shown no Real Love, I wish you nothing but happiness and blessings.
It's sad how as a child the first person your supposed to receive love from is your parents, but it's so sad that the most people to fear are your parents 😢I try everyday to not be anything like my "breeders"
I don't worry about it anymore, that's how I'm able to talk about it so casually. But I have found that when I talk about those sorts of things it brings out other people who have been in similar situations. I've gotten a lot of messages from people who were basically like, "thanks for saying what I've been afraid to".
I was raised by a paranoid schizophrenic mother and I endured massive abuse and torture. I tried telling people but no one ever believed me, because she could be such a Jeckle and Hyde. Years later I went back and confronted the people that were suppose to protect me in the juvenile system. Somehow an "I'm sorry" did not cut it. Still to this day I struggle with letting people close to me, because I do not trust. Therapists all try to tell me that I turned out so normal, for having been through all that I have. I would always tell them, "trust me, I am far from normal." Lmao! What is normal anyway? Do any of us really know? I will say this, going through all that I have, I have found a path to spirituality that I might not have found otherwise. It has caused me to be extremely tender hearted and more able to have compassion for others. Life continues to be a journey. One day at a time. Sending beautiful blessings and love to all.
Bless your heart, my heart is breaking hearing your story, i wanna give you a big hug. im glad you're strong enough to talk about it and not let it consume you. i think of my own kids and how fragile their little minds were during the first 10 years, mammas are ment to keep their little ones positive and praise them, what you went through has me crying , im an empath and i feel everythng deeply, im so sorry, I must say you turned into a fine Adult, Handsome too, you inner strength shines through, stay positive and may the rest of your life be beautiful
I hear from people sometimes who basically say "thanks for talking about this, because I can't". So hopefully other people hearing about my experiences will help them understand that they can face theirs also.
Im sure you are making a positive impact in peoples life. you should start a facebook group based on this. many people would benefit from it for sure. including people who are expecting their first child. proper guidance and understanding how not to treat a child. You are definitely a light worker. the ripple effect you are creating by caring enough to reach out to people will go a long way, keep up the good work, well done fellow lightworker
I am so proud of you for telling your truth. I hope you have given a child the strength to come forward and tell on their abuser. I thank you for your courage.
David congratulations on having the courage to tell your story and rise as the Phoenix from the flames. Unfortunately childhood abuse stays you for a lifetime and you are not able to just " get over it" or " leave it in the past ". Just like other people that have PTSD this will always be a part of you. Thank you for posting the video may it give hope to many victims and open the eyes of any one around a victimized child.
Poor little fella. I am sorry for the little boy in you. Your mother should love you unconditionally. She was mentally ill and should not have "parented". I dont know how you survived and pray you have thrived in spite of this rearing.
This is my first time watching you, you're amazing. It has reignited my deep hate for my stepfather. I am healed from his sickness (Complex PTSD: from Surviving to Thriving. By Pete Walker) and my children are thriving. I just turned 50 and I'm tickled - I made half a century and I'm happy.
You make me look at my little boy and just treasure him even more. I’m proud of your courage and your candor in sharing the horrors of your childhood without raging. You have such a kind face, and my mama heart aches for you. ✌🏽❤️
Wow! You literally just described my childhood. I know your pain, you didn't deserve any of that abuse, neither did I. Thanks for sharing your story, it really brought home how unoriginal abusive mothers are.
Finally there's a way to talk and hear about something like this. Poverty, Horder-Syndrome, Abuse.....so many kids used to think, they were the only child in the World to live under those Circumstances. Thank you for speaking up for people, who went through all of this. No child should feel so terrible alone in the Universe like you or me did. God bless you! Greetings from Austria
So glad you’re speaking up about your experiences, it’s good for people to hear about it bc the first step is realizing that this stuff is not normal and should not be happening, nobody deserves that. There were a lot of mind games in my teen years which actually pushed me towards psychology and child developmental psych as well. I’m so sorry for what you were put through, but it’s amazing to see you are still here and trying to spread word about this subject. Sending love x
Yeah, when you are young you think that is normal, which is the biggest part of the problem. Then when you reach out you discover that people don't seem to want to know, (makes you feel isolated).
That's true. I personally still feel it's very important to talk about it, especially with the means and platforms we have to do so nowadays like the internet and stuff. I think people have gotten better relating to opening up about personal issues and others have gotten much better about being receptive to it and wanting to help as well! I know people are still struggling to find those they can talk to about issues going on at home etc but I think not even 20 years ago people didn't like to talk about problems to do with stuff like this. Maybe there was a fear of feeling weak or the fear and experience of rejection and shunning after coming out with things. I just have faith in the fact that people do care for others and want to help and that communication and opening up is a good thing in so many aspects! Nobody deserves a cold shoulder or a look the other way in times of need, which is why what you're doing is great because now others can follow suit and speak up as well, in this case it makes people feel less isolated and more understood! X
I grew up abused too. I remember one "spanking" that involved breaking 3 different kitchen tools accross my bare butt, then a yard stick finally a metal spatula until I was bleeding. Then had to wash the blood off kitchen floor, with no pants on. But nobody would help even though I told people. One day I lost it and hit her back, so they called the sheriff and had me arrested.
My father passed away when I was 5. He was in the army for years and also paid into SS for years. My mom collected 1,500 dollars a month for me a month and she never bought me clothes or anything for school. It caused me to be made fun of and ultimately I quit school. She would spend the money on her or my stepfather. She also sold all the land my father left me in his will cuz my stepfather convinced her I'd never need it. She's also passed away. I took care of her the last few years of her life and she left my brother (who was never there) a $50,000 insurance policy and I haven't seen him since. I lost everything taking care of her. My job, my fiance and my vehicle cuz I had to quit my job. I'm about to be homeless and I can't help but think that was her last "fuck you Darlene".
That is not what you deserved. I'm so sorry to hear you went through this. I as a mother can't even imagine to harm my children in anyway shape or form. I hope you heal and forgive her for all the bad things she did to you. You deserve to be whole and happy.
Laurdess Valentino Hi I agree I was thinking "what a movie that would make". I wander what made her so evil? I have ideas like narcissistic, bi-polar etc. But why?
Sometimes people with Borderline Personality Disorder take anti-psychotic medication, I have read. There are books about growing up with a Borderline mom, and the abuse that it entsils. I can't remember the exact titles, since I don't have BPD myself, and I don't think my mom has either, but something like "Understanding the Borderline Mother", and "Surviving the Borderline Parent". I read that it is common for Borderline people to lock their family members outside overnight.
I know what you're going through because I too survived child abuse. My abuse was physical, mental and emotional. My mother told me if I told anyone they would send her to jail and would be put into a home. I had anger for a long time and it caused me physical problems until I found out my mother and father were mentally ill. Around the age of 30 I was able to forgive them. That allowed me to get rid of the anger and it felt like a big load was lifted off my shoulders. I have four children and never abused them and they grew up having self worth, unlike me. I still have some lingering issues due to my childhood but am able to overcome. The physical problems it has caused is I now have Primary Progressive Multiple Sclerosis and degenerative spine disease plus a couple of other things. God bless you.
It's unfortunate that you have to carry your injuries with you from your childhood. I have an idea of what that is like due to constant aches and pains from some of the damage I received as a child. Nothing like what you must be going through I'm sure, but I get it...
My mom told me the same thing. I was around five I had already been abused sexually for three years and it had recently stopped. I told my mom I wanted her to put me up for adoption and she told me the only people who would want me were old men who wanted do to the “THINGS” I didn’t like to do. Scared me half to death. She also would say things like I’m going to go hand myself because of kids. Lots of abuse in all forms and now I’m getting flashbacks. They think it was set off from having a girl. I’m so scared of her getting hurt they way I was.
My mother was terrible but she didn't play those kind of games. I'm so sorry. Now I have a son and he's my world. I can't imagine hurting him in any way. I'm so sorry this happened to you.
There's a lot of us. I've been watching a lot of your videos and my mom did A LOT of the same things your mom did, like throwing me out constantly, playing games, I wore bruises a lot. CPS was unheard of in those days but they want to fuck with good parents now because of the money incentives they get.
I am so sorry you had to go through such abuse and cruelty. She sounded very mentally ill. God be with you and bring healing to you. I want to give you a hug.
The amount of people who have commented and have similar stories or been thru abuse from their parents is really sad..there are so many of use millions world wide that are never heard of but you are all strong survivors and yous all deserve the deepest respect and the best and nicest things in the world...its sad to hear as little kids bad things happen to yous or mistreated and neglected..no child should ever go thru that ...very sad
I hate that as a little boy you have to suffer so much. My heart hurts for you and I sincerely hope you are doing the healing work so that you can find the love that you never had. Sending you light and love and prayers
Thank you so much for sharing your story. It's so often the story that men keep quiet about the abuse they endure. Thankl you for breaking the silence and sharing your story. It musten't have been easy.
I hope you faced her out on how this made you feel. My heart goes out to you and wish for you strength and real love. You are a brilliant shining example of human resilience and courage. Your presence will help other survivors find strength and hopefully peace of mind
You are extremely brave for talking about the abuse. Some of us still want to pretend abuse never happened...what for? She denies all of it anyway and she isn't sorry anyway. My advice to you is give it to God, he is the only one who can take the pain and the resentment away. No therapy nor medication will do as good as Jesus. I tell you this because its the truth. I had to give it to him...I didnt want to go on pretending all was ok while I was slowly dying inside. Pray to God to heal you. I feel for you.
I don't know if it's so much bravery, or that I'm so over it I can talk about it casually. Either way from the comments it seems to help others in similar circumstances come to terms to hear someone else talk about it freely.
This is still on going, they beat us expected us to be normal. Normal is NOT REAL. You worry all the time, because you never know when you are going to get hit. I was told to go to my room and not to come out even to relieve myself. Was force to eat green chilie so hot that she couldn't eat it. Its unreal the things that were said and things I was forced to do. When she became sick and was going to die, I went to speak to her. She said " Oh it's you, I never liked you anyway ". I said " I'm sorry that no one LOVED YOU AS A CHILD. I'm sorry that no one SHOW YOU ANY KINDNESS. I'm sorry your people BEAT you as a child. I'm sorry that your older siblings hurt as a child. She kept looking the other way. I finished with " you could never STOP MY DADDY FROM LOVING ME MOST OF ALL." THAT WAS WHAT YOU WHAT YOU WANTED. " Now I have been telling my Dad about why he didn't protect his children. Yes he is old but he put his children in a position to live with a monster. She was just as ugly to her blood child. A DEMON she was.
I went through emotional and physical child abuse, but nothing like you did. I'm so sorry you went through that. I have a saying, whatever doesn't break you, makes you a stronger person. I'm so happy you went to college and are able to talk about it and help others.
David I am so sorry for what you went through......what a horrible childhood........you are a lovely person and what you said about the fact that very often people know that a child is being abused and don't intervene is so true. Some years ago I called the police regarding a little boy who constantly had black eyes from his step dad.......so many people knew what was happening to this kid and did nothing.......it sickened me. As soon as I heard about this child and what he was going through (and saw the blackened eyes for myself) I got him some help. It is never acceptable for people to ignore a child who is being abused. Good luck to you David and thank you for having the courage to speak out.
So happy for you to be able to tell it like it is. Are you my long lost little bother? So sorry you had this mother. I am older and laid both parents to rest. I proved I am a better soul by treating her with compassion till the end. Be proud
I think the one thing worse than the abuse is finding out that people knew I was being abused and didn’t help or they didn’t want to hear me or believe me when I told them what was going on. This type of psychological abuse needs to be brought to light.
Looking back on my own experience, there were people that knew, but I think they were just at a loss of what to do. They didn't want to cause more damage or make things worse. They did little things to help, like let me stay for dinner, etc. Most young children, even though being abused or neglected, still "love" their abuser (parent) and are fearful of being separated from all they really know. So now that I'm older I understand where these people were at.
I'm so sorry you suffered like that. Your story of survival & resiliance is so special though. Thank you for being vulnerable. Thank you for reaching out and sharing. Blessings.
I’m so sorry to hear your story and read the abuse stories in the comments. My heart breaks in knowing the unimaginable things you guys went through at the hands of people who were supposed to take care of you. I wanted to share something from my heart and I hope I don’t get hate for this next part as I’m only stating my own thoughts, if a person doesn’t believe this that’s fine, hope we can all be respectful. To all: even through all that pain and lonely nights, there was somebody by your side that heard you and never wanted you to suffer that way. You are loved. You are worth way more than you imagine. God loved you so much to the point of giving his life for you. I pray for peace that goes beyond all understanding that comes only from Him. I pray for healing of all those past wounds. I pray for restoration and new found hope. Wish you all the best.
There's just no way to tell you how much I feel for you! Had so much of the same type thing many years before you, and in a different environment, but so many of the "games" and tearing down! There's just no way to explain to others the effects these things have on you, and you've done a great job of conveying here. People who didn't have to hold their breath EVERY morning of their lives to figure out which "mother" was going to with us that day will never understand the terror.... Kudos for coming through it, and keep up the good work...
Mine too!! Seriously, at least you had food ! I mean I cannot believe the similarities and I am not kidding you, my mom did this shit and then some! People I think don't even believe me when I say what happened to me, I lived in cars, no food, men allowed to do horrible things, rode in the car during robberies, I could go on and on .....
I just found your channel. Thank you so much for sharing your pain with me. You seem to have grown up into a well-spoken, strong, handsome man. I commend you for not hiding behind the truth and letting us all know we aren't alone. I'm so very sorry what has happened to you and every victim of abuse.
Thank you for sharing. No wire hangers crazy mother!!! My fathers mother (I don’t call her grandmother) was just like your mother. Except, his father finished the jobs by breaking his bones. I am so sorry. This is not your fault. I can tell you know this now, but as a child you don’t know who you can trust. Of course since my father was abused... you can imagine it trickles down. Thank god he wasn’t AS bad, but I told a police officer and he said, “Hunny, I can’t do anything if your mom doesn’t file charges.” Here I am welted from my neck, back, legs black, blue purple, and bleeding (yes there was blood) so much for asking for help.
Thanks for sharing.Takes alot of courage to tell the world and share your pain. I can imagine the emotional and physical exahaustion just trying to talk about it. God bless.Peace.
The I’m up so you’re up game is something my birth mother used to do to me. She would wake me up at 2 in the morning and make me write in a journal. It was such bizarre behavior. This happened from my ages 5-7 years old. It was very scary, she would scream at me if I cried and asked to go back to sleep. I have never shared this with anyone except my older brother. I try not to think about those years too much, it’s painful to remember.
I’m so sorry you went through this. I know a little boy who is a child of a woman with MPB and he goes through hell. He’s been taken but put back in her care!!!! What bothers me the most with many case of abuse is even when it’s evident, and you have proof, it’s the authorities who fail to intervene the way they’re meant to. I don’t know what else to do 😭
Heartbreaking story. Unbelievable how twisted and evil people can be. What ever the reason, it’s inexcusable. Makes my blood boil. You are amazing! Thank you for telling your story. It will help many people.
Coffee Talk - it reached me. I can’t imagine how some people can be so sadistic to their own children. I am pretty chaotic and always struggling, but I love my children to bits and do the best I can.
I didn't just have a mom like this but most of my relatives. I'm 50 now. I just started learning about narcissism and other family neglect and abuse a few years ago. They've stolen a mom from me, a family, a childhood, a home. I'm basically dead. Not some heroic survivor. I want to get some repairation from them somehow or I probably won't survive. I watched the movie mommie dearest several years ago and was struck by that ladies demeanor, similar to my mom. That lead me to learning about narcissism. These people, my family or relatives, what ever are very deadly evil cowards. I just say one thing among many about my mom. I was an only child. Her only child who she never cared about or spent time with me. She remarried. Never cared about me. Then when I was about 24 yrs old she and her husband adopted a baby who she treated like gold. Then this adopted child has just now recently had a baby. It's sickening.Theirs much much more they've done to me. Basically like mommie dearest times ten. I probably won't be alive much longer. Sorry about your mother.
A lot of us have had our childhoods ripped away. And we should have reparations for it, but we won't. That's the first hurdle you need to get over, that even if you are owed something by someone else, you aren't going to get it. So owe yourself instead. Of all the people, you are the one that you should be able to rely on the most, don't let yourself down. Whatever happened to you it happened in another time and another life, so leave it there. Stop bringing it with you. Leave it there on that version of you, and concentrate on the version of you that is living in the now.
Russell Maxwell oh my god. That’s horrendous. She’s a total narcissist. Please don’t do anything to yourself. I’ve suffered from narcissistic abuse too. It’s hideous. I struggle each day. I can give you my email address if you want? Please don’t give up. She’s pure evil. I am here for you my friend.
Me too!! My entire family was a pack of pedophiles! They were all mentally sick and evil!!!! It was 24/7 torture for me. The others complied to their perversions but I hated them and they tried to kill me several times! Horrible human beings😡
Your story broke my heart.. I'm so sorry and glad that you are here today able to share your story. Wish I could give you a big hug. Easy stories like this on the news but to hear it so personally.. your are an amazing and special person. Good wishes for the best future possible. ❤❤
Im 51. Last year I finally sought counselling. Drugs and alcohol could only work for so long..... Wish I had of done it 45 years ago! We are Survivors, not victims... Broken people break people.... ;(
a friend of mine who also has abusive parents recommended your channel to me. it’s so cathartic to hear other people’s experiences. I don’t remember what age it started, probably around 10 or 11, but at some point my parents started making me stay awake till 3AM while they shouted at and interrogated me, even on schools nights knowing I had to be up at 6. even if I didn’t have school, my dad would sometimes wake me up after just a few hours of sleep and keep going. thank you for sharing your story.
l swear if l ever win the lotto im giving money to you to have a childhood you never had, your storys broke my heart, god bless you stay strong everyone is behind you and im praying for you from lreland💚
+Coffee Talk yes its lovely here but raining 90 per cent of the time😂 tho im in belfast, tourist usually come up here for the game of thrones tour or the murals and peace wall☺hope your doing ok
my mom passed away 2yrs ago..I have to say,i adored my mother..she was very loving.we were poor ,on welfare,but that didn't matter to me..at 8yrs old she married a man that loved to mentally abuse me..it caused me to completely change.by the time I was 15,i quit school and was a teen Mom twice I struggle with substance abuse , depression,anxiety...now I'm 40,been clean since the day my mother overdosed..and I see that ppl had it alot worse than I did.and I feel like I wasted my life "feeling sorry" for myself. but everyone deals differently..I jus wish I could go back and change things,instead of letting my anger take over I really could've helped others..sorry u endured what u did..glad u r helping others.
Thank you so much for sharing your story, even as sad as it is ~ I can imagine what you must of gone through~!!! I wish I could have been there for you~!! I am very proud of your accomplishments~!! You are a great person to say to say the least~! You still have that right to be angry~! I love you man~! may your paths now be filled with hope, sunshine, and rainbows~!! ~Your blessings as many as the stars in the heavens~!! ~peace~
thank you so much for sharing, it is always so much easier knowing you are not alone in this. I will always be affected by what I had to endure. I have flashbacks, nightmares, anxiety, PTSD, and severe depression from my experiences. I truly believe it will never end.
It's a shame what you have to go through. But there can be an end to it, or at least some relief as you get older and move farther away from the experiences. Remember, they are behind you somewhere in the past, another time, another life. They can be left behind.
Years ago l would have said you don't no abuse .but , now 54yrs old I've come to realize the sycililogical effects of worthlessness and disprovel has effected me most.Always trying to win aprovel and never believing it if I had it , I wanted to be everybodies friend , best employee , and honest . All just to work myself into an early grave with few friends ,little to no money and family " 4 brother that don't talk to each other " . See , they call the ME TO movement a new thing , I'll bet the one that named it was a bully that was tired of hearing there victims complain .lol luv ya bro , keep fighting the fight .My mouth as a sword I Will strike my enemy down, not for my well being but there's . For the spiritual ,wealth is measured in the sole .God bless .
My whole family abused me and nobody never has cared about helping me and still nothing has changed except me turning into a very angry person that stays in a constant rage. I ABSOLUTELY HATE MYSELF AND I HATE BEING ALIVE 💯
I was beaten for no reason. ...like 50 whelp marks on my legs and she loved to pull my hair out. We had a nice house and a maid. Poor Mommie had to stay home when the maid was off. I was hundreds of times told to get out and get a job at a drive in restaurant. I was a quiet good kid. I had 2 dresses in 5th grade, I usually had three pairs of underwear. I went to a private school. She had numerous pill overdoses and drank all the time. She also flaunted her affairs behind Dads back throughout m y life. Today my two sisters still live at home. I got out. We all act like she was a good Mother. I am still afraid of her and she is unbelievably 99.5 and has to be the worlds oldest living drunk. Should I have killed her when I was a teenager? I caught her at 19 when I was a virgin sleeping with a boy I had dated among other things. I guess she was a nymphomanic. I appear normal but so empty and yearn for a Mother. I hope she dies real soon. I had a horse and a retired cavalry officer who taught me to ride for free of course. That is what saved me. Daddy was absent a lot and cold. We dared not tell him anything. I wanted good credit. I started working at 19. She had charged a thousand dollars on my store credit. I was too scared to say anything to her. She got me to invest in the family company and I could not get my life savings back. LOL. I am 70 now. Why did I ever go back or not confront her? Fear I guess. My Mother cooked and the food was great. It take decades of therapy to say I now know she is a MONSTER. Please Mother, turn the tv off . its 1 AM and I have school tomorrow.
I am so sorry to hear what you went through. I was physically and mentally abused as a child by a family member that was supposed to watch me after school. I wasn't believed until the situation was dire and undeniable. What you went through was awful and it breaks my heart. You are in my thoughts and I am sending you all my love.
There must be something deeply wrong with a mother who treats their child like this. How can you look into those innocent eyes, knowing that this little person trusts you and needs your protection, how can you become a devil and torture this little person? Makes me 🤮
Thanks for sharing your story. It is so awful what you went thru.. there is very little out there about psychological torture and abuse. It is admirable that you are helping others and must be a very strong person
I’m very sorry you had a childhood like that when it should be the best part of our life. You seem to be healing well and got a great education. It could be a lifetime of healing I’m praying for you David. God bless you
I could hardly get through this. I am so sorry you had to endure this for many years. I kept waiting for you to say that you finally spoke up and someone helped you. For the people who knew and didn’t help.... they’re no better than she was.
I know exactly what you mean when I told of the abuse no one would help, teachers, pastors, mostly because my mom had told them that I was a difficult child and they believe her. No one when they saw the bruises even cared. But the emotional scars are what hurt the worst. I stay far away from my family, I am free, free, free, today.
My mother used to play dead. She'd say your daddy is dead so you want me dead too. I was 4-5 years old. She'd play dead, she wouldn't smile or anything. I know how this guy felt there.i remember how she'd drag me to bars and stay til closing time. I would sleep on 2 chairs til we went home. I know how it feels to be abused.
None of this is your fault! She had serious problems! You are such a strong person and I truly hope your life is the best it could be! You deserve the best.
I agree with comment that 'society failed you'. Your mother was a schizophrenic and she misused her medications. Why wasn't this noticed and you removed from her care??? She must have had doctors and social workers handling her case so why did they not consider the child left in the care of this very sick woman?!?! This sadly is far to commonplace in society when kids in abusive homes are failed by those PAID to protect them. Thank you for your story and i hope this helps you move on from your past trauma.
Your mom is sick and I pray you overcome the twisted bs she put you through. You are a wonderful beautiful person, thank you for sharing your story, it is so freeing to finally see that we that have been through this kinda stuff aren't alone as we tgought
Thank you for sharing! I just found your channel and (while I won't get too personal) I can say that in an odd sort of way it really helps to know that one is not alone in having experienced abuse from the people that were supposed to take care of them. You are so brave to talk about this as it can be quite traumatic and difficult to sort through and articulate, especially to other people. Thanks again and I hope that you and everyone else in the comments of this video have found some peace in your lives despite what you've endured. :)
You should have been protected from this abuse, your mother was not capable of mothering you, and should have been prosecuted, or sectioned at least, but others were complicit and should have stepped in. Your disclosures will help others to expose the terrible lives some children endure. I with my siblings were battered and abused by our father, but even as a young child I realised other adults, including my mother failed to protect us. I told my head teacher what was happening (this was in the 1960s) to be told you girls get hysterical over nothing. I gave up on others helping me and simply endured my miserable life, and planned to leave, and at 17 yrs. got out, as did my siblings. Keep up your good work in exposing the truth. I worked through most of my hang ups through being as good a mother as I was able to be, to my own children ( made mistakes, probably overprotective at times, but certainly would not and did not intentionally hurt them) and then later going to uni. and becoming a social worker, fiercely defending vulnerable people. Hope this helps more and more abused/neglected children to get the love and support they deserve.
I'm so sorry you had to go through this. That's such a tough life for a little one to go through. Stay strong and hope you get tonnes of happy times now 😊
OH MY GOODNESS BROTHER YOUR MOTHER WAS VERY SICK! IT'S HARD TO HEAR YOUR STORY! THE MOST POWERFUL THING YOU CAN DO TO HER NOW IS FORGIVE. IT WILL GIVE YOU YOUR POWER BACK. GOD BLESS YOU FOREVER...KEEP SHINNING LIGHT INTO THE DARKNESS! ❤💜❤💜❤ 2017🇺🇸💞
Coffee Talk Absolutely my brother! My heart breaks for you and still I rejoice for you. You forgiving her crushes the darkness and gives Glory to your Father GOD. You are a miracle! You are educated, articulate, handsome and wonderful! Bless you in Jesus Name ❤💜❤💜❤ 2017🇺🇸💞
I can relate to you within a minute ! I was NEVER a priority to my mother ! I feel horrible for you and anyone else that has gone through this insanity !
I am so sorry David your mom ABUSED you like this!! But look at you today! you turned out to be a INTELLIGENT productive Gentlman! SO MANY FAILED YOU DAVID! Your story is heart breaking! It's sad other family members did not take you out of that house and away from from mentally unstable CRUEL MOTHER! and of course SOCIAL SERVICES FAILED YOU! 😢😢she MANIPULATED You and played very CRUEL MIND GAMES with you.But FAST FORWARD to NOW You are a VERY INTELLIGENT! Man! Educated and well spoken! YOU did a GREAT JOB! working on YOURSELF! to GET where you are today!! CONGRATULATIONS DAVE!! you over came your ABUSE AND NEGLECT!! Thank You for sharing your sad personal story! MAY GOD always BLESS YOU!! 🙏🙏🙏😍😍😍
What a life of hell you have had. I wish you had been my little boy, I would have just loved you and cared for you like I did my daughters. I sure hope you find some comfort and Solace now.
You are a strong man and you have came a long way in your life. Alot of times this turns people to suicide, and I am glad you have not chosen that outcome
I'm so sorry you had that awful childhood...on behalf of moms everywhere... I'm just so sorry 😢. And..where were your relatives? Shame on friends/family/teachers for not picking up on any of this abuse
When I grew up I didn't really know who was abused and who was not, nor all the things that I'm learning now, in the last four years, how "normal " appearing families live their daily lives so differently. I have been " traumatized " and " untraumatized " from a college class in Early Childhood Development to " friends ", and the internet on Narcissism, and more. I AM MOST GRATEFUL FOR THIS EDUCATION.
my mother was an under age hippie pregnant with me in 1969 and kept me for 2 years then gave me up for adoption I had abandonment issues. my adopted parents didn't know what was wrong with me. father was abusive and mom was alcoholic. I had to forgive all of them to get sober. I an 48 now and free of hate thanks to aa.
Good that you were finally able to break the cycle. Abusive childhoods can be generational curses flowing from the parents to the children and on and on if the cycle isn't broken.
Saddened to read your experiences, but happy that you`re hate free.
This is straight up child abuse. Sorry to hear that you had to go through that.
my dad never talked about his childhood he let it consume him he ended up drinking himself to death glad your able to talk about ot
That's a shame. I know it can be very hard on a lot of people.
My dads the same way
Lenora Holland , flashbacks of childhood sexual molestation came back to me in my 50s. I wound up having a severe mental break and had 28 electric shock
treatments. Abuse is a killer.
Yes you are 200% correct! She's NUTZ!
Agreed. Talking helps
As a mum i just wanted to time warp and scoop up the little boy in you and hug him and mother him ...tuck you in bake cookies bless my babies i know monster mothers like that its appaling. You have matured into an intellegent aware man not broken by blows but strengthened .thankyou for sharing your insite ...its not always "normal" or ok...
It breaks my heart to know this goes on daily. It’s Soooo sad & horrific what you and other children have to go through. I hope & pray you find healing and peace. Thank you for sharing your story. Love & blessings
I'll take all the blessings I can get, thanks
OMG! This is almost a blueprint of my childhood. I managed to avoid most of the ‘beatings’, by being a good girl. My sister was much more wilful than me, so received regular beatings. For me, it was ‘everything is your fault’. My fault she was sad, my fault she was angry, my fault when she banged her head on her car door! I used to believe she was watching me. I thought she recorded me through those buttons. It made me so scared. I always assumed it was just me, as anyone I have ever told, just looked at me like I was mad! This is the first time ever I have heard the same sort of thing! She also taught us that the whole of life is ‘hell’, that only we die can we go to heaven. I am 54, she has been dead for a decade. When she died, my only emotion was joy at finally being free! So, thank you so, so much, for sharing that. xxx
Lots of people have been through similar circumstances and never realized it because they never heard anyone else talk about it, (at least not anyone who still had most of their screws intact)! It's easy for me to talk about it because it doesn't bother me anymore, so I figure it would help a few others out if I did.
it made us stronger i was the black sheep my brothers were well clothed and fed but not me my brothers got it because they were older my sisters because they were girls always. the evil logic of that i hated and suffered from all my young life anything broken lost or taken was my fault it was never me but had to take the beatings both my parents are gone now but like you no tears for them i like you have never spoken of it to any one some of the stuff i will never mention to any one ever i felt relief at there passing
paul stewart so sorry to hear. None of you deserved that! Sending prayers and love for you all.
Tracey Banting like my childhood. I am 36,and I feel that like I am still stuck in the past.
My mother played some of those games too. I did the laundry and somehow a navy t shirt got into the whites. I was so afraid and got beat mightily for that. Spent most of my life thinking I must be crazy, because I would never have allowed a navy item to go in a white load. One day about 10 years ago, the family was remiscing and my mom said "remember that time I put the navy t shirt in the white load?" And laughed! I am 59. I spent most of my life thinking I was crazy! What I have learned, is that some things from an abusive past will affect you always. No one "gets over it". I'm sorry you also lived thru abuse.
Completely relate to what you went through. My mom was a single mother, she worked, had lots of boyfriends, drank a lot and was always gone. She was abusive in different ways than your mom. Been in and out of therapy most of my life. Left home at 16. Started working at 13 (lied about my age) save every penny and got the hell out. Moved to New Mexico and built myself a great life.
Good that you were able to get away and leave that life behind.
I am so very sorry for you!!!! I'm fighting for children's rights daily. You have no idea how much you can impact people by your truth. Thank you
I'm not afraid to talk, so I figure others who have been through similar circumstances might be encouraged to let it out and eventually let it go.
Coffee Talk I'm seriously hoping I can one day.... Finding you has been a blessing
Coffee Talk I had Huskies for a year...do you mind if I mention you in my channel, if not, I understand
You can mention me on your channel, that's fine.
Coffee Talk you are such a lovely person!!!! I shall share you, I honor your permission 🌬️🌬️😍😁❤️
man ... i thought my childhood was bad... sorry to hear you went through such terrible child abuse dude
We all have a story to tell. Some worse than others.
@@CoffeeTalkLive My childhood was a living hell!! Everything was my fault as well!! I was the reason for her unhappy life! So I got punished for it! She used my sexual abuse to get what she wanted from my Father! So dysfunctional! I was watched, I was followed, I was humiliated in front of others! Just anything to make my life miserable. She locked herself in her bedroom and said she was going to kill herself because I went on a date! So I was the REASON she wanted to kill herself! If I got sick she said it was God's way of punishing me for being a bad daughter! She went thru my dirty clothes, especially my underwear t o see if I was being a bad girl with boys during school! She beat me one time in front of my father, humiliating me because I bled in my underwear from my period! I almost had a nervous breakdown at 17! I was locked out of the house and didn't know if I was going to let in the house! She had a gun with her at all times! Her purse! Her nightstand and I thought she would blow my brains out at night! She threatened to cut my hair off in my sleep! I had very long hair! My father threatened to cut my nails off while I slept! This poor man I feel so sorry for and can identify with him!
My mother said, she knew EVERYTHING I did when not in her sight and I was terrified of her and at the time my whole family was, but I didn't know that! They just didn't CONFRONT it! That's WHY I never told about my sexual abuse by my Father! What a miserable life we go thru! So sad! Many people know and don't give a shit! It breaks my heart to hear this man! I can so identify and my heart goes out to him!
@@RubySlippers1100 I hope your able to have a fresh start with the going through being abused by both of your parents and not being shown no Real Love, I wish you nothing but happiness and blessings.
It's sad how as a child the first person your supposed to receive love from is your parents, but it's so sad that the most people to fear are your parents 😢I try everyday to not be anything like my "breeders"
For adults who abuse children, there is a very very special place in hell for you. I am so sorry to hear about your abuses.
These are the moments I wish there was a hell.
David, very sorry you had such a horrific childhood, at the hands of your own Mother. I hope you have found Peace, and Love. Teri x
I don't worry about it anymore, that's how I'm able to talk about it so casually. But I have found that when I talk about those sorts of things it brings out other people who have been in similar situations. I've gotten a lot of messages from people who were basically like, "thanks for saying what I've been afraid to".
I was raised by a paranoid schizophrenic mother and I endured massive abuse and torture. I tried telling people but no one ever believed me, because she could be such a Jeckle and Hyde. Years later I went back and confronted the people that were suppose to protect me in the juvenile system. Somehow an "I'm sorry" did not cut it. Still to this day I struggle with letting people close to me, because I do not trust. Therapists all try to tell me that I turned out so normal, for having been through all that I have. I would always tell them, "trust me, I am far from normal." Lmao! What is normal anyway? Do any of us really know? I will say this, going through all that I have, I have found a path to spirituality that I might not have found otherwise. It has caused me to be extremely tender hearted and more able to have compassion for others. Life continues to be a journey. One day at a time. Sending beautiful blessings and love to all.
I know where you're coming from. My mother was a saint, just ask her...
@@CoffeeTalkLive Right!?! lol!
Kathleen Beveridge p
Make a video. Share your story with us.
Do you still have contact with your mom?
Bless your heart, my heart is breaking hearing your story, i wanna give you a big hug. im glad you're strong enough to talk about it and not let it consume you. i think of my own kids and how fragile their little minds were during the first 10 years, mammas are ment to keep their little ones positive and praise them, what you went through has me crying , im an empath and i feel everythng deeply, im so sorry, I must say you turned into a fine Adult, Handsome too, you inner strength shines through, stay positive and may the rest of your life be beautiful
I hear from people sometimes who basically say "thanks for talking about this, because I can't". So hopefully other people hearing about my experiences will help them understand that they can face theirs also.
Im sure you are making a positive impact in peoples life. you should start a facebook group based on this. many people would benefit from it for sure. including people who are expecting their first child. proper guidance and understanding how not to treat a child. You are definitely a light worker. the ripple effect you are creating by caring enough to reach out to people will go a long way, keep up the good work, well done fellow lightworker
I am so proud of you for telling your truth. I hope you have given a child the strength to come forward and tell on their abuser. I thank you for your courage.
David congratulations on having the courage to tell your story and rise as the Phoenix from the flames. Unfortunately childhood abuse stays you for a lifetime and you are not able to just " get over it" or " leave it in the past ". Just like other people that have PTSD this will always be a part of you.
Thank you for posting the video may it give hope to many victims and open the eyes of any one around a victimized child.
Hope your doing good buddy, sending blessings your way man!
Much appreciated, thanks for your sentiment.
сйкис
David Gudgeon
Poor little fella. I am sorry for the little boy in you. Your mother should love you unconditionally. She was mentally ill and should not have "parented". I dont know how you survived and pray you have thrived in spite of this rearing.
This is my first time watching you, you're amazing. It has reignited my deep hate for my stepfather. I am healed from his sickness (Complex PTSD: from Surviving to Thriving. By Pete Walker) and my children are thriving. I just turned 50 and I'm tickled - I made half a century and I'm happy.
Glad you escaped it and doing well.
You make me look at my little boy and just treasure him even more. I’m proud of your courage and your candor in sharing the horrors of your childhood without raging. You have such a kind face, and my mama heart aches for you. ✌🏽❤️
Wow! You literally just described my childhood. I know your pain, you didn't deserve any of that abuse, neither did I. Thanks for sharing your story, it really brought home how unoriginal abusive mothers are.
Many of them seem to fall into the same patterns of behavior.
I wonder why that is?
Finally there's a way to talk and hear about something like this. Poverty, Horder-Syndrome, Abuse.....so many kids used to think, they were the only child in the World to live under those Circumstances. Thank you for speaking up for people, who went through all of this. No child should feel so terrible alone in the Universe like you or me did. God bless you! Greetings from Austria
So glad you’re speaking up about your experiences, it’s good for people to hear about it bc the first step is realizing that this stuff is not normal and should not be happening, nobody deserves that. There were a lot of mind games in my teen years which actually pushed me towards psychology and child developmental psych as well. I’m so sorry for what you were put through, but it’s amazing to see you are still here and trying to spread word about this subject. Sending love x
Yeah, when you are young you think that is normal, which is the biggest part of the problem. Then when you reach out you discover that people don't seem to want to know, (makes you feel isolated).
That's true. I personally still feel it's very important to talk about it, especially with the means and platforms we have to do so nowadays like the internet and stuff. I think people have gotten better relating to opening up about personal issues and others have gotten much better about being receptive to it and wanting to help as well! I know people are still struggling to find those they can talk to about issues going on at home etc but I think not even 20 years ago people didn't like to talk about problems to do with stuff like this. Maybe there was a fear of feeling weak or the fear and experience of rejection and shunning after coming out with things. I just have faith in the fact that people do care for others and want to help and that communication and opening up is a good thing in so many aspects! Nobody deserves a cold shoulder or a look the other way in times of need, which is why what you're doing is great because now others can follow suit and speak up as well, in this case it makes people feel less isolated and more understood! X
I grew up abused too. I remember one "spanking" that involved breaking 3 different kitchen tools accross my bare butt, then a yard stick finally a metal spatula until I was bleeding. Then had to wash the blood off kitchen floor, with no pants on. But nobody would help even though I told people. One day I lost it and hit her back, so they called the sheriff and had me arrested.
My father passed away when I was 5. He was in the army for years and also paid into SS for years. My mom collected 1,500 dollars a month for me a month and she never bought me clothes or anything for school. It caused me to be made fun of and ultimately I quit school. She would spend the money on her or my stepfather. She also sold all the land my father left me in his will cuz my stepfather convinced her I'd never need it. She's also passed away. I took care of her the last few years of her life and she left my brother (who was never there) a $50,000 insurance policy and I haven't seen him since. I lost everything taking care of her. My job, my fiance and my vehicle cuz I had to quit my job. I'm about to be homeless and I can't help but think that was her last "fuck you Darlene".
I hope to God you are in a better situation, may God protect you from all that is bad.
That is not what you deserved. I'm so sorry to hear you went through this. I as a mother can't even imagine to harm my children in anyway shape or form. I hope you heal and forgive her for all the bad things she did to you. You deserve to be whole and happy.
I pray for your healing in every way. I am so sorry for all you suffered.
Dude... write a book. Seriously.
Laurdess Valentino
Hi I agree I was thinking "what a movie that would make".
I wander what made her so evil? I have ideas like narcissistic, bi-polar etc. But why?
He mentioned that his mom took medicines for schizophrenia.
Yes I agree
Sometimes people with Borderline Personality Disorder take anti-psychotic medication, I have read. There are books about growing up with a Borderline mom, and the abuse that it entsils. I can't remember the exact titles, since I don't have BPD myself, and I don't think my mom has either, but something like "Understanding the Borderline Mother", and "Surviving the Borderline Parent". I read that it is common for Borderline people to lock their family members outside overnight.
Moondog 😯 What?!? I had no idea that there were books about my mom!
I know what you're going through because I too survived child abuse. My abuse was physical, mental and emotional. My mother told me if I told anyone they would send her to jail and would be put into a home. I had anger for a long time and it caused me physical problems until I found out my mother and father were mentally ill. Around the age of 30 I was able to forgive them. That allowed me to get rid of the anger and it felt like a big load was lifted off my shoulders. I have four children and never abused them and they grew up having self worth, unlike me. I still have some lingering issues due to my childhood but am able to overcome. The physical problems it has caused is I now have Primary Progressive Multiple Sclerosis and degenerative spine disease plus a couple of other things. God bless you.
It's unfortunate that you have to carry your injuries with you from your childhood. I have an idea of what that is like due to constant aches and pains from some of the damage I received as a child. Nothing like what you must be going through I'm sure, but I get it...
Deborah Tawadros this gives me hope.
My mom told me the same thing. I was around five I had already been abused sexually for three years and it had recently stopped. I told my mom I wanted her to put me up for adoption and she told me the only people who would want me were old men who wanted do to the “THINGS” I didn’t like to do. Scared me half to death. She also would say things like I’m going to go hand myself because of kids. Lots of abuse in all forms and now I’m getting flashbacks. They think it was set off from having a girl. I’m so scared of her getting hurt they way I was.
Michelle Herrera I’m so sorry to hear that. Sending prayers your way!
Steph P thank you
My mother was terrible but she didn't play those kind of games. I'm so sorry. Now I have a son and he's my world. I can't imagine hurting him in any way. I'm so sorry this happened to you.
It's okay, I'm over it. I tell the story to reach out to others who might have gone through similar experiences.
There's a lot of us. I've been watching a lot of your videos and my mom did A LOT of the same things your mom did, like throwing me out constantly, playing games, I wore bruises a lot. CPS was unheard of in those days but they want to fuck with good parents now because of the money incentives they get.
I am so sorry you had to go through such abuse and cruelty. She sounded very mentally ill. God be with you and bring healing to you. I want to give you a hug.
The amount of people who have commented and have similar stories or been thru abuse from their parents is really sad..there are so many of use millions world wide that are never heard of but you are all strong survivors and yous all deserve the deepest respect and the best and nicest things in the world...its sad to hear as little kids bad things happen to yous or mistreated and neglected..no child should ever go thru that ...very sad
There were many, and they don't feel like they can ever express it, which means they still carry the weight of it.
Omgoodness. I'm so sorry you had to go thru this. Positive vibes your way✨
I'll take all the positive vibes I can get, thanks
I hate that as a little boy you have to suffer so much. My heart hurts for you and I sincerely hope you are doing the healing work so that you can find the love that you never had. Sending you light and love and prayers
I appreciate that, thanks
Thank you so much for sharing your story. It's so often the story that men keep quiet about the abuse they endure. Thankl you for breaking the silence and sharing your story. It musten't have been easy.
It gets easier once you get it out. That's why I can talk about it so easily now.
I hope you faced her out on how this made you feel. My heart goes out to you and wish for you strength and real love. You are a brilliant shining example of human resilience and courage. Your presence will help other survivors find strength and hopefully peace of mind
You are extremely brave for talking about the abuse. Some of us still want to pretend abuse never happened...what for? She denies all of it anyway and she isn't sorry anyway. My advice to you is give it to God, he is the only one who can take the pain and the resentment away. No therapy nor medication will do as good as Jesus. I tell you this because its the truth. I had to give it to him...I didnt want to go on pretending all was ok while I was slowly dying inside. Pray to God to heal you. I feel for you.
I don't know if it's so much bravery, or that I'm so over it I can talk about it casually. Either way from the comments it seems to help others in similar circumstances come to terms to hear someone else talk about it freely.
Jesus is how I survived it.
This is still on going, they beat us expected us to be normal. Normal is NOT REAL. You worry all the time, because you never know when you are going to get hit. I was told to go to my room and not to come out even to relieve myself. Was force to eat green chilie so hot that she couldn't eat it. Its unreal the things that were said and things I was forced to do.
When she became sick and was going to die, I went to speak to her. She said " Oh it's you, I never liked you anyway ".
I said " I'm sorry that no one LOVED YOU AS A CHILD. I'm sorry that no one SHOW YOU ANY KINDNESS. I'm sorry your people BEAT you as a child. I'm sorry that your older siblings hurt as a child. She kept looking the other way. I finished with " you could never STOP MY DADDY FROM LOVING ME MOST OF ALL." THAT WAS WHAT YOU WHAT YOU WANTED. "
Now I have been telling my Dad about why he didn't protect his children. Yes he is old but he put his children in a position to live with a monster. She was just as ugly to her blood child. A DEMON she was.
I went through emotional and physical child abuse, but nothing like you did. I'm so sorry you went through that. I have a saying, whatever doesn't break you, makes you a stronger person. I'm so happy you went to college and are able to talk about it and help others.
David I am so sorry for what you went through......what a horrible childhood........you are a lovely person and what you said about the fact that very often people know that a child is being abused and don't intervene is so true. Some years ago I called the police regarding a little boy who constantly had black eyes from his step dad.......so many people knew what was happening to this kid and did nothing.......it sickened me. As soon as I heard about this child and what he was going through (and saw the blackened eyes for myself) I got him some help. It is never acceptable for people to ignore a child who is being abused.
Good luck to you David and thank you for having the courage to speak out.
Good that you stepped in where so few people would have bothered.
Thank you! I am a true believer that those of us who have a voice need to speak out for the weaker ones. Bless you
Sorry you went through this she was a mind controller. So sick. I hope you are at peace from her. You didn't deserve this.
I don't really think about her anymore unless I'm telling a story about her.
Does she live near you or have you moved far away from her now x I hope that your life is now a happy one and that all is good for you now xx 😊😊
So happy for you to be able to tell it like it is. Are you my long lost little bother? So sorry you had this mother. I am older and laid both parents to rest. I proved I am a better soul by treating her with compassion till the end. Be proud
There are a lot of people in the same boat, many don't realize until they hear someone else's story.
I think the one thing worse than the abuse is finding out that people knew I was being abused and didn’t help or they didn’t want to hear me or believe me when I told them what was going on. This type of psychological abuse needs to be brought to light.
I'd rather not have known that the knew!
Looking back on my own experience, there were people that knew, but I think they were just at a loss of what to do. They didn't want to cause more damage or make things worse. They did little things to help, like let me stay for dinner, etc. Most young children, even though being abused or neglected, still "love" their abuser (parent) and are fearful of being separated from all they really know. So now that I'm older I understand where these people were at.
I'm so sorry you suffered like that. Your story of survival & resiliance is so special though. Thank you for being vulnerable. Thank you for reaching out and sharing. Blessings.
Hopefully someone realizes that others have been through similar circumstances and that they will be okay.
I’m so sorry to hear your story and read the abuse stories in the comments. My heart breaks in knowing the unimaginable things you guys went through at the hands of people who were supposed to take care of you. I wanted to share something from my heart and I hope I don’t get hate for this next part as I’m only stating my own thoughts, if a person doesn’t believe this that’s fine, hope we can all be respectful.
To all: even through all that pain and lonely nights, there was somebody by your side that heard you and never wanted you to suffer that way. You are loved. You are worth way more than you imagine. God loved you so much to the point of giving his life for you. I pray for peace that goes beyond all understanding that comes only from Him. I pray for healing of all those past wounds. I pray for restoration and new found hope.
Wish you all the best.
There's just no way to tell you how much I feel for you! Had so much of the same type thing many years before you, and in a different environment, but so many of the "games" and tearing down! There's just no way to explain to others the effects these things have on you, and you've done a great job of conveying here. People who didn't have to hold their breath EVERY morning of their lives to figure out which "mother" was going to with us that day will never understand the terror.... Kudos for coming through it, and keep up the good work...
Stay strong!!
My mother was like that or even worse :,-(
A lot of people have had really bad experiences it seems.
Not my mother but Fairbridge Childrens Home,WA.
FREAKS!
Mine too!! Seriously, at least you had food ! I mean I cannot believe the similarities and I am not kidding you, my mom did this shit and then some! People I think don't even believe me when I say what happened to me, I lived in cars, no food, men allowed to do horrible things, rode in the car during robberies, I could go on and on .....
My mother was as cruel as they come! I still have bad memories! Plus I was sexually abused by my father and she knew!
@@sophiemack235 I had a sick mother, sadistic father, and was in juvenile lockup...I hear you!
I just found your channel. Thank you so much for sharing your pain with me. You seem to have grown up into a well-spoken, strong, handsome man. I commend you for not hiding behind the truth and letting us all know we aren't alone. I'm so very sorry what has happened to you and every victim of abuse.
Just trying to let other people know that it's okay to talk about it.
Thank you for sharing. No wire hangers crazy mother!!! My fathers mother (I don’t call her grandmother) was just like your mother. Except, his father finished the jobs by breaking his bones. I am so sorry. This is not your fault. I can tell you know this now, but as a child you don’t know who you can trust. Of course since my father was abused... you can imagine it trickles down. Thank god he wasn’t AS bad, but I told a police officer and he said, “Hunny, I can’t do anything if your mom doesn’t file charges.” Here I am welted from my neck, back, legs black, blue purple, and bleeding (yes there was blood) so much for asking for help.
Sounds similar to the things my mum did. It’s a terrible feeling. So glad you’re still with us today x
Truth is always stranger than fiction... stay strong!
Yes it is!
Thanks for sharing.Takes alot of courage to tell the world and share your pain. I can imagine the emotional and physical exahaustion just trying to talk about it. God bless.Peace.
The I’m up so you’re up game is something my birth mother used to do to me. She would wake me up at 2 in the morning and make me write in a journal. It was such bizarre behavior. This happened from my ages 5-7 years old. It was very scary, she would scream at me if I cried and asked to go back to sleep. I have never shared this with anyone except my older brother. I try not to think about those years too much, it’s painful to remember.
People don't realize what torture that can be. It is abuse.
Lauren C so sorry this happened to you. My mom used to wake me up during the night to study . I was only 12
@@fitnessbabe7958 soul destroying!
All the best,honey.xx
♥
I’m so sorry you went through this. I know a little boy who is a child of a woman with MPB and he goes through hell. He’s been taken but put back in her care!!!!
What bothers me the most with many case of abuse is even when it’s evident, and you have proof, it’s the authorities who fail to intervene the way they’re meant to. I don’t know what else to do 😭
I'm hugging you right now.
I appreciate the sentiment
That’s what I was thinking too. Big hugs.
I'm so sorry you had to go through that.
Heartbreaking story. Unbelievable how twisted and evil people can be. What ever the reason, it’s inexcusable. Makes my blood boil. You are amazing! Thank you for telling your story. It will help many people.
Hopefully it lets people know that it's okay to talk about things like that.
Coffee Talk - it reached me. I can’t imagine how some people can be so sadistic to their own children. I am pretty chaotic and always struggling, but I love my children to bits and do the best I can.
I didn't just have a mom like this but most of my relatives. I'm 50 now. I just started learning about narcissism and other family neglect and abuse a few years ago. They've stolen a mom from me, a family, a childhood, a home. I'm basically dead. Not some heroic survivor. I want to get some repairation from them somehow or I probably won't survive. I watched the movie mommie dearest several years ago and was struck by that ladies demeanor, similar to my mom. That lead me to learning about narcissism. These people, my family or relatives, what ever are very deadly evil cowards. I just say one thing among many about my mom.
I was an only child. Her only child who she never cared about or spent time with me. She remarried. Never cared about me. Then when I was about 24 yrs old she and her husband adopted a baby who she treated like gold. Then this adopted child has just now recently had a baby. It's sickening.Theirs much much more they've done to me. Basically like mommie dearest times ten. I probably won't be alive much longer. Sorry about your mother.
A lot of us have had our childhoods ripped away. And we should have reparations for it, but we won't. That's the first hurdle you need to get over, that even if you are owed something by someone else, you aren't going to get it. So owe yourself instead. Of all the people, you are the one that you should be able to rely on the most, don't let yourself down. Whatever happened to you it happened in another time and another life, so leave it there. Stop bringing it with you. Leave it there on that version of you, and concentrate on the version of you that is living in the now.
Russell Maxwell oh my god. That’s horrendous. She’s a total narcissist. Please don’t do anything to yourself. I’ve suffered from narcissistic abuse too. It’s hideous. I struggle each day. I can give you my email address if you want? Please don’t give up. She’s pure evil. I am here for you my friend.
@@CoffeeTalkLive my mom and other relatives have stolen two or three homes from me also it's not really just nothing
@@vanessasouthern1792 okay. my email is russellmaxwell245@gmail.com and did you have any family members at all that were caring and loving. Thank you
Me too!! My entire family was a pack of pedophiles! They were all mentally sick and evil!!!! It was 24/7 torture for me. The others complied to their perversions but I hated them and they tried to kill me several times! Horrible human beings😡
Your story broke my heart.. I'm so sorry and glad that you are here today able to share your story. Wish I could give you a big hug. Easy stories like this on the news but to hear it so personally.. your are an amazing and special person. Good wishes for the best future possible. ❤❤
Im 51. Last year I finally sought counselling. Drugs and alcohol could only work for so long..... Wish I had of done it 45 years ago! We are Survivors, not victims... Broken people break people.... ;(
You'll pull through it, hang in there!
Thanks...one day at a time is all any of us can do!!
a friend of mine who also has abusive parents recommended your channel to me. it’s so cathartic to hear other people’s experiences. I don’t remember what age it started, probably around 10 or 11, but at some point my parents started making me stay awake till 3AM while they shouted at and interrogated me, even on schools nights knowing I had to be up at 6. even if I didn’t have school, my dad would sometimes wake me up after just a few hours of sleep and keep going. thank you for sharing your story.
A lot of people don't get how that can be torture for a child to be kept up like that.
l swear if l ever win the lotto im giving money to you to have a childhood you never had, your storys broke my heart, god bless you stay strong everyone is behind you and im praying for you from lreland💚
Well greetings Ireland, beautiful landscapes!
+Coffee Talk yes its lovely here but raining 90 per cent of the time😂 tho im in belfast, tourist usually come up here for the game of thrones tour or the murals and peace wall☺hope your doing ok
Hanging in there best I can, thanks
Daniélín NicG that is the nicest thing I’ve heard for a long time on social media.
Thank you for being brave enough to share your story! I hope you can heal from this♥️
I'm doing fine. Just sharing so others can see there is a way past it all.
my mom passed away 2yrs ago..I have to say,i adored my mother..she was very loving.we were poor ,on welfare,but that didn't matter to me..at 8yrs old she married a man that loved to mentally abuse me..it caused me to completely change.by the time I was 15,i quit school and was a teen Mom twice I struggle with substance abuse , depression,anxiety...now I'm 40,been clean since the day my mother overdosed..and I see that ppl had it alot worse than I did.and I feel like I wasted my life "feeling sorry" for myself. but everyone deals differently..I jus wish I could go back and change things,instead of letting my anger take over I really could've helped others..sorry u endured what u did..glad u r helping others.
It's a shame that things went sour with the new husband. I hope your new perspective serves you well.
I'm so very sorry that you experienced these things. I can't even imagine. You're a very strong person to persevere through such abuse. *HUG*
Thank you so much for sharing your story, even as sad as it is ~ I can imagine what you must of gone through~!!! I wish I could have been there for you~!! I am very proud of your accomplishments~!! You are a great person to say to say the least~! You still have that right to be angry~! I love you man~! may your paths now be filled with hope, sunshine, and rainbows~!! ~Your blessings as many as the stars in the heavens~!! ~peace~
Thank you for your kind sentiment
thank you so much for sharing, it is always so much easier knowing you are not alone in this. I will always be affected by what I had to endure. I have flashbacks, nightmares,
anxiety, PTSD, and severe depression from my experiences. I truly believe it will never end.
It's a shame what you have to go through. But there can be an end to it, or at least some relief as you get older and move farther away from the experiences. Remember, they are behind you somewhere in the past, another time, another life. They can be left behind.
Years ago l would have said you don't no abuse .but , now 54yrs old I've come to realize the sycililogical effects of worthlessness and disprovel has effected me most.Always trying to win aprovel and never believing it if I had it , I wanted to be everybodies friend , best employee , and honest . All just to work myself into an early grave with few friends ,little to no money and family " 4 brother that don't talk to each other " . See , they call the ME TO movement a new thing , I'll bet the one that named it was a bully that was tired of hearing there victims complain .lol luv ya bro , keep fighting the fight .My mouth as a sword I Will strike my enemy down, not for my well being but there's . For the spiritual ,wealth is measured in the sole .God bless .
Touche
Tony Tackett Wow inventive spelling of psychological there!
My whole family abused me and nobody never has cared about helping me and still nothing has changed except me turning into a very angry person that stays in a constant rage. I ABSOLUTELY HATE MYSELF AND I HATE BEING ALIVE 💯
I bet you ran for the hills as soon as you could . You are certainly a survivor !!! God bless you .
Yes I did actually...
Thank you. You are strong and brave. For sharing and for surviving this. Many of us can't and don't. Much love too you brother
That's why I talk about it from time to time, so people can see someone who got through it.
Remember, you are good, no matter what she did and said to you.
Listening to your story,I felt your isolation and loneliness as a young child. Thank you for sharing. Much love and respect to you.🙏
True enough that it was very lonely.
I was beaten for no reason. ...like 50 whelp marks on my legs and she loved to pull my hair out. We had a nice house and a maid. Poor Mommie had to stay home when the maid was off. I was hundreds of times told to get out and get a job at a drive in restaurant. I was a quiet good kid. I had 2 dresses in 5th grade, I usually had three pairs of underwear. I went to a private school. She had numerous pill overdoses and drank all the time. She also flaunted her affairs behind Dads back throughout m y life. Today my two sisters still live at home. I got out. We all act like she was a good Mother. I am still afraid of her and she is unbelievably 99.5 and has to be the worlds oldest living drunk.
Should I have killed her when I was a teenager? I caught her at 19 when I was a virgin sleeping with a boy I had dated among other things. I guess she was a nymphomanic. I appear normal but so empty and yearn for a Mother. I hope she dies real soon.
I had a horse and a retired cavalry officer who taught me to ride for free of course. That is what saved me. Daddy was absent a lot and cold. We dared not tell him anything. I wanted good credit. I started working at 19. She had charged a thousand dollars on my store credit. I was too scared to say anything to her. She got me to invest in the family company and I could not get my life savings back. LOL. I am 70 now. Why did I ever go back or not confront her? Fear I guess. My Mother cooked and the food was great. It take decades of therapy to say I now know she is a MONSTER. Please Mother, turn the tv off . its 1 AM and I have school tomorrow.
Star Shine wow love that sucks soo sorry
I am so sorry to hear what you went through. I was physically and mentally abused as a child by a family member that was supposed to watch me after school. I wasn't believed until the situation was dire and undeniable. What you went through was awful and it breaks my heart. You are in my thoughts and I am sending you all my love.
There must be something deeply wrong with a mother who treats their child like this. How can you look into those innocent eyes, knowing that this little person trusts you and needs your protection, how can you become a devil and torture this little person? Makes me 🤮
Thanks for sharing your story. It is so awful what you went thru.. there is very little out there about psychological torture and abuse. It is admirable that you are helping others and must be a very strong person
It will make you or break you, that's for sure...
I agree this breaks my heart as well. It is so hard to understand. Why....?? Why would she do all of that to her own child?? So unbelievably cruel.
Partly mental illness, partly just plain mean. But if you ask her, she was the perfect mother...
I’m very sorry you had a childhood like that when it should be the best part of our life. You seem to be healing well and got a great education. It could be a lifetime of healing I’m praying for you David. God bless you
I'll take all the blessings I can get, thanks
Its over now.she cant hurt you. thnx for sharing. God bless You😇
I could hardly get through this. I am so sorry you had to endure this for many years. I kept waiting for you to say that you finally spoke up and someone helped you. For the people who knew and didn’t help.... they’re no better than she was.
Thank you so much.I totally empathize with you and Thank Giod you survived too.Much of your testimony mirrors mine. Thank you God Bless You always.
God bless you as well
I know exactly what you mean when I told of the abuse no one would help, teachers, pastors, mostly because my mom had told them that I was a difficult child and they believe her. No one when they saw the bruises even cared. But the emotional scars are what hurt the worst. I stay far away from my family, I am free, free, free, today.
The abuser has a sick need to controll and feel all powerful. Also to blame others for evetything. No responsibility.
My mother used to play dead. She'd say your daddy is dead so you want me dead too. I was 4-5 years old. She'd play dead, she wouldn't smile or anything. I know how this guy felt there.i remember how she'd drag me to bars and stay til closing time. I would sleep on 2 chairs til we went home. I know how it feels to be abused.
God bless u and I’m glad u broke the cycle.... and nothing your mother did to u is not your fault... 💐🌷🌹😉
None of this is your fault! She had serious problems! You are such a strong person and I truly hope your life is the best it could be!
You deserve the best.
I agree with comment that 'society failed you'. Your mother was a schizophrenic and she misused her medications. Why wasn't this noticed and you removed from her care??? She must have had doctors and social workers handling her case so why did they not consider the child left in the care of this very sick woman?!?! This sadly is far to commonplace in society when kids in abusive homes are failed by those PAID to protect them. Thank you for your story and i hope this helps you move on from your past trauma.
I was often treated by "professionals" like I was the problem. Never occurred to them to find out the source of my bad behavior in school...
Hmmm! Anyone not a 'professional' would realise kids act out when they are unhappy!
Your mom is sick and I pray you overcome the twisted bs she put you through. You are a wonderful beautiful person, thank you for sharing your story, it is so freeing to finally see that we that have been through this kinda stuff aren't alone as we tgought
So sorry you had to go through that :( This makes me so sad.
It's alright, all in the past..
True :) Well you're a very strong person! It's very motivational :)
Thank you for sharing! I just found your channel and (while I won't get too personal) I can say that in an odd sort of way it really helps to know that one is not alone in having experienced abuse from the people that were supposed to take care of them. You are so brave to talk about this as it can be quite traumatic and difficult to sort through and articulate, especially to other people. Thanks again and I hope that you and everyone else in the comments of this video have found some peace in your lives despite what you've endured. :)
You should have been protected from this abuse, your mother was not capable of mothering you, and should have been prosecuted, or sectioned at least, but others were complicit and should have stepped in. Your disclosures will help others to expose the terrible lives some children endure. I with my siblings
were battered and abused by our father, but even as a young child I realised other adults, including my mother failed to protect us. I told my head teacher what was happening (this was in the 1960s) to be told you girls get hysterical over nothing. I gave up on others helping me and simply endured my miserable life, and planned to leave, and at 17 yrs. got out, as did my siblings. Keep up your good work in exposing the truth. I worked through most of my hang ups through being as good a mother as I was able to be, to my own children ( made mistakes, probably overprotective at times, but certainly would not and did not intentionally hurt them) and then later going to uni. and becoming a social worker, fiercely defending vulnerable people. Hope this helps more and more abused/neglected children to get the love and support they deserve.
I'm so sorry you had to go through this. That's such a tough life for a little one to go through. Stay strong and hope you get tonnes of happy times now 😊
OH MY GOODNESS BROTHER YOUR MOTHER WAS VERY SICK! IT'S HARD TO HEAR YOUR STORY! THE MOST POWERFUL THING YOU CAN DO TO HER NOW IS FORGIVE. IT WILL GIVE YOU YOUR POWER BACK. GOD BLESS YOU FOREVER...KEEP SHINNING LIGHT INTO THE DARKNESS!
❤💜❤💜❤
2017🇺🇸💞
Long since forgave her, but I won't forget. Keeps me from crossing that bridge with her again.
Coffee Talk
Absolutely my brother! My heart breaks for you and still I rejoice for you. You forgiving her crushes the darkness and gives Glory to your Father GOD. You are a miracle! You are educated, articulate, handsome and wonderful! Bless you in Jesus Name
❤💜❤💜❤
2017🇺🇸💞
Well bless you too!
you are so strong to went through all this hell and find courage to speak up and help others
Hugs xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx no one should have to endure any of this at all!
I can relate to you within a minute ! I was NEVER a priority to my mother ! I feel horrible for you and anyone else that has gone through this insanity !
I was lucky I left the home at around 12 years old I can't imagine were things would have gone.
I am so sorry David your mom ABUSED you like this!! But look at you today! you turned out to be a INTELLIGENT productive Gentlman! SO MANY FAILED YOU DAVID! Your story is heart breaking! It's sad other family members did not take you out of that house and away from from mentally unstable CRUEL MOTHER! and of course SOCIAL SERVICES FAILED YOU! 😢😢she MANIPULATED You and played very CRUEL MIND GAMES with you.But FAST FORWARD to NOW You are a VERY INTELLIGENT! Man! Educated and well spoken! YOU did a GREAT JOB! working on YOURSELF! to GET where you are today!! CONGRATULATIONS DAVE!! you over came your ABUSE AND NEGLECT!! Thank You for sharing your sad personal story! MAY GOD always BLESS YOU!! 🙏🙏🙏😍😍😍
What a life of hell you have had. I wish you had been my little boy, I would have just loved you and cared for you like I did my daughters. I sure hope you find some comfort and Solace now.
You are a strong man and you have came a long way in your life. Alot of times this turns people to suicide, and I am glad you have not chosen that outcome
I'm so sorry you had that awful childhood...on behalf of moms everywhere... I'm just so sorry 😢. And..where were your relatives? Shame on friends/family/teachers for not picking up on any of this abuse
Found out years later that the relatives knew and didn't want to get involved.
When I grew up I didn't really know who was abused and who was not, nor all the things that I'm learning now, in the last four years, how "normal " appearing families live their daily lives so differently. I have been " traumatized " and " untraumatized " from a college class in Early Childhood Development to " friends ", and the internet on Narcissism, and more. I AM MOST GRATEFUL FOR THIS EDUCATION.