I know it’s not healthy for you and I don’t recommend doing it. But I started smoking Cigars occasionally. People started approaching me more when I have a Cigar in my hand just to tell me stories and have a nice conversation about something. Now I don’t recommend smoking cigars everyday I’ll smoke one once a month everything in my opinion is okay if you do it in moderation and don’t over indulge. I don’t recommend cigarettes whatsoever however.
The place you're describing in the beginning is a third place. A place where you can hang out inexpensively and make friends randomly which is severely lacking in our north american world and it has permeated problems all the way through the ages.
If you think it's lacking in North America... this sort of thing doesn't exist in Eastern Europe. You know who you know and that's it. No one talks to strangers.
I'd like for you to not need a car for everything lol. But fortunately many cities have downtowns with these sorts of places. I can be lucky to live in Washington DC for this sort of thing
@@Ready4Whatever DC itself has many bars and restaurants, but even outside of DC, there are some nearby suburbs where you can find them. Rosslyn, Crystal City, Shirlington, Old Town Alexandria, Tysons, Reston, Leesburg, etc.
I try to be friends with people but I'm always last place in any social situation I'm in. For various reasons, I have come to the conclusion that people don't care for me or my company. I try to go out and should do this more but I click with no one. I'm honestly filled with flaws and lack social status. Often people just say I'm nice which translates to boring and harmless. I'm not so filled with passion confidence and excitement to leave a lasting impression and make them feel good. I have nothing to offer.
Why don't you actually go and increase your value. Go to gym, put on muscle, you will look better and be more confident. Get some skin care routine, get you face to be clean. Try some fragrance, new haircut. If you don't have any money than get job and earn it. I am not saying to change for other people but for you. Because you will be way more confident and happy. Especially if you keep promises you gave yourself like spending less time on phone, no sugar, good sleep routine etc. Improve yourself and you will have something to offer.
@@damjan2440 Thanks that makes sense. I'm looking to improve my personality as well as looksmax. Part of my insecurity comes from not being able to relate to people about their interests. If I'm lucky I'll meet someone who will introduce me to things that change my interests.
11:05 was definitely true because I approached a group of friends and they said “It takes a lot of courage to just come over and introduce yourself and I really respect that!” ❤
I got rid of 90 percent of my friends the past few years. I became more and more successful and they seemed more and more stuck and just bitter about life. I can't be around shit like that anymore. I tried helping but they didn't want to better themselves. Been working on dating, have a date Thursdsy, and I definitely need to make some new friends.
I'm going to the gym,but im mostly isolated there despite having people around,no one talks with no one,wich is kinda a good thing because they focus.But I'm thinking of trying Crossfit for the community, although im not sure i like this kind of training,but im considering it.
part time job is a great way to meet people. I've got jobs basically for the social aspect of it. I'm pretty introverted and quiet and got a delivery job at a big employer. I was talking to good looking women daily. I didn't hit on them because of the work thing, but we hung out and got to meet other people. It was easy and natural.
Yeah, this works for people who ran through the instances of a propper socialization and now find themselves in a situation where they leave an old friend group because they've outgrown them or move to a new place e.g. Most people will go through such a situation a few times in their lives but it won't make a big deal as they are used to integrate quickly under new circumstances. However, people who generally feel uncomfortable around those propper socialized ones, especially in groups, need other solutions. Statistically, it's very unlikely for people who have social anxiety, avoidand personality disorder, trauma etc. that causes a lack of social connections, to improve by will. This is, because the premise of such a disorder usually causes subconscious believes and identity traits that have to be displayed by experts first to weaken them. This doesn't mean that it is not one's own responsibility to do something about the problems but the solution is way more complex than just getting into a job, a course or a gym to meet people. And it will definitely take more than one summer to accomplish. It's like putting a dog in an environment of birds. It won't change it's behaviour and grow some wings just because it sees others having them. Exercise needs to be adapted to the circumstances of the individual needs.
man you are taking yourself too seriously. Just force yourself, be disappointed in yourself, think back about those shitty interactions in your bed and grow up that's it. You'll eventually become more confident
@@KokahZ777 Ok, listen: 1) I'm not even in the state where I feel like the fictional person I described, at the moment. I became better at approaching people or laughing about mistakes instead of cringing upon them and have managed to form a little circle of friends and contacts. Not big though, but decent. 2) But I have been there a while ago. And when I was there, the mistake I made was doing the exact same thing, that Denmo suggested - without having seen this particular video of course but plenty of even-minded life coaches who are selling textbook mentality for the wrong audience. I would bet, that 70% of the viewers of this video are at the entirely wrong place, because what they need is a therapist and not someone who tells them they should behave ordinarily and then everything will get better by magic. 3) With that being said, here is what I did (wrong): I forced myself into groups of those people (hard enough during COVID) I've long been afraid of. I went to social events, parties, even a job that required me moving out from home for a while. According to the thesis of this video, this should have made me stronger, right? No, of course not. It only reinforced every inhibition I've ever held towards people. And with the experience I have now, it appears totally obvious to me why. 4) If you have a trauma, a mental disorder, depression or something like that (which I assume the majority of people in the self-help scene have), odds are not likely that it will go away by doing what once caused it, IF you are not aware of your emotional processing, the original source of that emotion and a specific skillset of what to do about. To obtain that skillset you will have to have the right training, which presupposes the right trainer (aka psychiatrist) to recognize what the root of the problem is in the first place, right? And this is why doing all the stuff I've mentioned served me nothing and it will probably not serve the people that consume only self-help videos with no adjusted advice for their individual needs. 5) Arguing with "and grow up that's it" is the exact mindset that inhibits you from becoming actually more aware of yourself and others, because it boils down extremely complex effects to a frustration of not allowing your rationality to put your emotional understanding in a healthy relation to the root of the feeling itself. 6) Finally, that doesn't mean that Denmo's advice is generally bad. A good portion of "fuck off"-mentality can help but it's not suited for you if you have to solve underlying problems first. Do you understand? It's basically the wrong tool for your approach.
@@desty4030 I assume that you didn't even read my text or just the first lines which brings me to the conclusion that it must have triggered your ideology so hard that you "wasted" time as well to write an answer. And now it should become clear to you what my comment actually intended...😂
I’m in this stage where I’m on the brink of overhauling a social life based on an experiment that just never worked out. And this is helpful cuz I’ve been wanting to go to a county fair with a friend, but I’ve always been frustrated knowing I don’t really have any. Thing is, I’ve always had people that have liked me but I never tried to connect with them because my mind was always focused on trying to be friends with people who I wasn’t compatible with. If there’s anything I can add, be friends with who comes to you. Beggars can’t be choosers.
I do Uber on Saturday nights and honestly It's been one of the best things i've done to meet new people. I've met so many girls and successfully got their number for future rides. If you're fun and like to talk a lot this has to be the best way imo.
Do you ask girls out in your car though cos it's kind of a dodgy situation to be in if you're the girl. She doesn't know you, nor your temperament, so if she rejects you when you ask for her number she could be scared that you get angry and she ends up in a bad spot. Suppose it'd be fine if you gently suggest that your single and available and leave it up to her to actually say she's interested in you (unfortunately ik not many women will be bold enough to do this).
@@JBry_ I don't go that route as you have a higher chance of rejection. I give them my number for future rides and they reach out to me, once they get comfortable with seeing you more often you ask them out.
@@Denmosocial fair enough, we're all Jeffrey's or whatever. Either way your content is great, especially the 2023 monk mode vid helped a lot. I hope you make more long form content in the future 🙌
The older you get, the more you realize friends are not worth investing in. I'm not saying have no friends but only keep a select few people in your life who put a similar effort in. I'm in my late 20's and it seems people are always busy in life and can't even make a bit of time to hang out. Then it turns out most are just at home doing nothing. Focus on yourself first. Get your career going and once you have that going for you. Everything in life follows through. Your meet women once you got money and people will naturally want to be around successful people.
This seems like you are advising people to essentially forget about the social side of life during their 20s which is where most people will have the most fun socially. Surely you should try to focus on both making friends, having fun, and also beginning your career?
@@JBry_ You only got so much time in your life. Not saying you shouldn't have fun with others. Just that friends come and go far more than anything else. Put your energy into something that will give back to you.
@@JBry_ Yep, might sound harsh on paper but its truth to it. They say friends can replace family but the reality is. Friends far too often come and go. Most get a bit busy in life and never even attempt to communicate to you. A simple how you doing text once every few months is too much for some. Do a little test. Don't communicate to no friends unless they attempt to with you. Give it 6 months. The ones that communicate to you are worth keeping. The ones who ignore you are not. Funny thing is, those who I don't really even consider my friend I talk to more on a regular basis then those who would be my friend.
PSA: One cold approach led to having a bundle of friends, as of writing this. I talked to chick who sitting next to me and we had a blast of a conversation. At the end of the lecture, we had the same next class (chemistry, ironically, coz we got that chemistry *wink wink) and I met her friends (4 in total) and I had a blast, asked deep questions and everyone seemed happy. I sat next to them and we blew off yet again. Then before class started, there was an empty seat next to me and this chick, who btw I always wanted to talk to and actually know, sat next to me and we blew off as well. And I was to bundle everyone, the 5 girls on my left and the 1 girl on my girl, into one group and just talk and have a great discussion. I'm not going to talk about the day before as it was crazy as today. My confidence? mayn I'm in cloud 20 atp
Denim has good advice until he tells you to disregard discipline when it comes to sexual activity then he just tells you to be licentious and never to embrace the virtue of chastity.
I don't think he's religious. I'm Christian, if the advice he gives is against my beliefs then I won't follow it. You don't need to follow everything he says.
@@self-improverhis is exactly what I think about Denmo as well. Second stage, red pill creator. And a very good one at that. The red pill is important to go through as a phase but I think guys like him, HowToBeast, and other red pill creators will have their awakening to god pill very soon. Red pill will solve a lot of human issues but will not solve those that have the depth to reach spirituality. However, this type of advice in self improvement, and even talking to girls (minus the sex) helps guys who are in the camel or first stage.
I’m early 20 and I work for a small company with mostly adults who have kids and no time to go out. I need to figure out how to make friends other than work
this video filled me with so much rage and anger because all the things he said to do, i feel like i could never not in a million years could do, i suffer from a lot of social anxiety and when i'm in a room with a bunch of people i immediately start to shut down but i feel alone in this world and i don't have any friends and i haven't had girlfriend in 3 years and i've been suicidal for a hot minute now because it's really starting to affect me and really want to do the stuff you mentioned but i just can't, for some reason my stupid peace of shit worthless fucking mind just won't let me.
Same here bro im 25 and never had gf and real friends, i feel like its over, i worked out on my physiquw but have no social skills and skill to find a good job, i only know english and i feel like a loser becsuze what else it is
Dude, you're an entitled brat, because you've HAD a girlfriend, but also take it for granted and proceed to whine and complain. I've never touched or kissed a girl in my entire life (same as many guys out there) and I'm old enough when it seems really weird and exceptional. Go out and solve your problems, dude, you have it better than many of us. You can do it
Sup dawg. I've been following you for a minute now, and would like to purchase your course. You plugged in 2 different courses in this video. Which one should I get? What's the difference between the 2? Thx!
What if you’re too depressed to go out and do things? I’ve forced myself to hang out with people when I’m depressed and all I wanted to do was go home the whole time
try to change your view on this. Find ways how social interaction can bring you energy instead of taking. And don't say that this is impossible cuz you're introvert. Find the way! Btw once I found really good advice on this thing -- when you go out, go out with intention to have fun. Like, no matter what happens, no matter what mood would guys you hang out with have -- you anyway have fun. Try to implement this mindset.
How do I build connections, bond, and make jokes? I am loved by everyone, I bring a ton of value, 1/2 the people I can make laugh for days, the other 1/2 do not get it and make me feel awkward. I am ambitious, smart, kind, funny, chill, borderline quiet. To me everyone including work where I have been for a year feels like a stranger, I do not want to hang out because I have not yet gotten anyone to make me want to likely because I have not gotten anyone to open up to me. Also not many people ask me to hang out and I do get awkward in convos from time to time and they sometimes do get dry. I do not know what to do about that. Can we get a video??
Hey man, great video as always. How viable do you think these strategies would be for teens? Gyms and jobs most likely, but I do not know about the other opportunities you mentioned. Thanks dude
Joining clubs is definitely gonna be good. There should be more activities aimed at younger people rather than adults so this will work in your favour.
This is how most people think as well. Like people aren't getting part time jobs to meet fun people, they're getting a part time job because we're in a recession and costs of living are only rising. They are not interested in making friends.
@@katobytesDepends what the job is. Working in a party destination or the busiest part of town at the busiest bars/clubs I'm sure you are going to find a lot of the people who work there do actually want to meet lots of new people and do new stuff with them.
First of all thanks for the vedio. I'm from Ottawa, 🇨🇦🇨🇦. So boring city. Nothing to do. People are not very friendly. I work at Downtown. Sometimes I say hi. Girls got angry. Idk why? Their ego goes up😮😮
I have been thinking of joining a german class group, but I'm afraid I'm gonna find only guys like me there! And there's no refund, you have to pay a fine of at least half the semester. And I'm so done of doing things only weird introvert dudes do! Prior to that, I spent 2 years on an IT course and I didn't make any friends there. I used to think of myself as a shy person until I met those guys.
Can you not get a free taster session for this group to try it out first? Maybe email them and ask. Also, why do you think a class focused on learning German would be full of male introverts?
@@mannycalavera1848 The people who go to the taster session could still be representative of the people who will actually be in the class. At uni open days for courses you meet people there who are similar to the people who end up taking the course at that uni.
The issue is I’m over 25 now, have a fairly successful career, remote, moneys all set. Is it even worth it to get a low level job like you mentioned, just to build a social circle or meet girls? Also I have a hard time finding a part time job that only works weekends.
@@-whackdthat's probs gonna be difficult if he has a fully remote job. Not like he's in the office and every1 is off to the pub on a Friday night straight after finishing. I'd suggest trying to join a few clubs for sports/activities you like and meet like-minded people there.
why couldn't utube recommend this video at the start of my summer holidays it is litreally recommending me a day before when my schools are going to open
My friend group who I mainly party with is mostly guys in our 30s and a couple in early 40s. This is the time when you can use money to take your boat onto an empty end of a lake and host raves where everyone is on MDMA.
Thanks bro, really helpful video. Quite sad that there is not so much tourists nowadays in Moscow due to well known circumstances, but all other advices that you gave are really applicable. Keep up!
My neighbor always has a bunch of people at his house. I think I'll invite him to grab some cold ones. He's drinks like a fish though and I'm sober now. 😅
Hey Jack appreciate your content. But it always demoralises me when girls say they dont wanna get approached or bothered I do approaches and they go well but never did anything more from there. So is cold approach still relevant in 2023
Girls do want to get approached by guys they like. It's just the same as how guys love to get approached by girls they like. How do you know if the girls are gonna like you before you approach? In most cases, you can't...so just do it and find out :))
Yeah, bro. What's really frustrating about your content is that you are exceptionally good at making it sound way easier than it actually is. In fact: I don't know how it is for other guys - but the very reason _why_ I'm here in the first place is that the approaches you mentioned I tried didn't work out well!! The thing is that in order for those activities to work you need to _be_ a social guy in order for people to want to hang out with you in the first place.. And _that_ would be the real question: _How_ do you become this heartwarming, charismatic, likable guy people want to spend time with, people don't turn down when you try to get them to go out and bring together with other people!? You (and no other coaches) answer that question..
i am also in the situation that you and a lot of other guys are in socially, but i do feel like I'm improving pretty quickly and hopefully transitioning into that likeable guy. i think the thing that will allow you to improve is practice. if your approaches go badly, you need to learn from failure and try again and again. all difficult things in life are learned through failure. this is especially the case socially, but we all fear failing socially to an irrational degree. you have to let the ego go, even humble people have an ego which is why they try so hard to maintain that status of humility. it's all just a giant game of pretend, it doesn't matter if you fail
@@lukepowers8122 True words, thx a bunch for that! I also feel by now, that it depends to a significant degree to _who_ you meet. I just recently befriended a group of guys from my gym and with them it just works like a _charm_ because were on the same wavelength. The ultimate level however is: how do you get to create that vibe with _most_ people, or at least _more_ people, not only the ones that you have the easiest time with (not to say they are easy, but we just have _a lot_ in common, you know what I mean)?
Im 37 working pt at a coffee shop inside a hospital. What do u thinn about a man my age friending younger people. I feel like that branch that isnt pruned. Theyre there so im not gonna NOT be friends but its obviouslt im 15 years older... And yes I do like younger women. It is what it is Idk how to find ppl my age. I dont necessarily care but i feel like othrt pll do. Sort of stuck in a weird situation
I'm 22 and just had a rly gr8 time with >20 ppl on a bar crawl where most were 30+. I don't think it's a problem but ik some of my m8s my age would be a bit weirded out by it. I'd say just don't care about what ppl think. If you and some younger ppl get on, just be friends. As for meeting ppl ur age, that sounds difficult. Could try bumble for friends with an age limit? Might just have to try lots of different clubs/activities ur interested in until you find ppl uu age that u click with and can start a social circle from there.
@@JBry_ cool to hear that. When I was younger I had several older friends. The only ppl weirded by it were my parents lol But not guys my age are married w kids. It feels like I missed some sort of invisible deadline and so now it just makes sense to find younger women who love older men and maybe some guy friends in their late late 20s to mid 30,s who arent married. The married w kids thing creates a mild disconnect.
How can I combine this lifestyle of doing party, meeting friends and chics and doing cool stuff and on the other side going monk mode, crushing my fitness and business goals ect?
Is that even possible? Surely you have to grind one or the other for a while and then reduce intensity to be able to attempt to pursue both at the same time
for example 3 months monk mode, then go more social. Just do one thing after another. You can't go partying and monk mode simultaneously, but you can do them in order
![[Full Episode] The Restaurant War Thailand ศึกพ่อค้าซ่าแม่ค้าแซ่บ Episode 2 | 29 ก.ย. 67](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/r3lfLNH6Ke4/mqdefault.jpg)
Stop scrolling, start approaching
What about people with autism?😢
@@robinsoncrusoe2775start approaching
No, i don’t think I will.
@@robinsoncrusoe2775 still approach yeah I’m sure it’s way scarier but do it
I know it’s not healthy for you and I don’t recommend doing it. But I started smoking Cigars occasionally. People started approaching me more when I have a Cigar in my hand just to tell me stories and have a nice conversation about something. Now I don’t recommend smoking cigars everyday I’ll smoke one once a month everything in my opinion is okay if you do it in moderation and don’t over indulge. I don’t recommend cigarettes whatsoever however.
lmao interesting
I don’t recommend cigarettes, but I have met some really cool people at bars having cigarettes outside lol
Thank you Denmo! I will try to use this at my work today😊
This is such a cool idea. However there's just one thing I need to do before I become the type of guy to try this.
What's that
@JBry_ I'll tell you when it's done. Hopefully I'll remember.
@@pranavgainz4180 Ok, good luck
What do you think of female friends
Waste of time. Female friends are basically all the problems of a relationships but without the reward.
Legit Q. Did you just photoshops yourself in the thumbnail image?
The place you're describing in the beginning is a third place. A place where you can hang out inexpensively and make friends randomly which is severely lacking in our north american world and it has permeated problems all the way through the ages.
If you think it's lacking in North America... this sort of thing doesn't exist in Eastern Europe. You know who you know and that's it. No one talks to strangers.
I'd like for you to not need a car for everything lol. But fortunately many cities have downtowns with these sorts of places. I can be lucky to live in Washington DC for this sort of thing
@@airbus7373where in dc are there third places?
@@Ready4Whatever DC itself has many bars and restaurants, but even outside of DC, there are some nearby suburbs where you can find them. Rosslyn, Crystal City, Shirlington, Old Town Alexandria, Tysons, Reston, Leesburg, etc.
@@airbus7373 bars and restaurants are third places? Last time I checked people go there and stick to who they know
Denmo couldn't be a better time for this .. really struggling to form a social circle
He loves to shot the timing
Bro same
Same here
Same imma watch the whole video
me too
I try to be friends with people but I'm always last place in any social situation I'm in. For various reasons, I have come to the conclusion that people don't care for me or my company. I try to go out and should do this more but I click with no one. I'm honestly filled with flaws and lack social status.
Often people just say I'm nice which translates to boring and harmless. I'm not so filled with passion confidence and excitement to leave a lasting impression and make them feel good. I have nothing to offer.
Become better friends with yourself first and foremost.
go to therapy and get rid of trauma taking throught it and that energy will come.naturally
Why don't you actually go and increase your value. Go to gym, put on muscle, you will look better and be more confident. Get some skin care routine, get you face to be clean. Try some fragrance, new haircut. If you don't have any money than get job and earn it. I am not saying to change for other people but for you. Because you will be way more confident and happy. Especially if you keep promises you gave yourself like spending less time on phone, no sugar, good sleep routine etc. Improve yourself and you will have something to offer.
@@damjan2440 Thanks that makes sense. I'm looking to improve my personality as well as looksmax. Part of my insecurity comes from not being able to relate to people about their interests. If I'm lucky I'll meet someone who will introduce me to things that change my interests.
@@Freshadventures_ I agree, but I'm not sure how to put that into practice.
11:05 was definitely true because I approached a group of friends and they said “It takes a lot of courage to just come over and introduce yourself and I really respect that!” ❤
I dont have any friends
so make some
I got rid of 90 percent of my friends the past few years. I became more and more successful and they seemed more and more stuck and just bitter about life. I can't be around shit like that anymore. I tried helping but they didn't want to better themselves. Been working on dating, have a date Thursdsy, and I definitely need to make some new friends.
Have fun on your date Thursday budd 🎉
@@austintomkewitz3981 Thanks man! I really appreciate that!
Good luck with the date man
@@PiiDGE Thanks!
In case anyone wondered how my date went, it went well, and I snagged the gals number and will be having a second date.
I'm going to the gym,but im mostly isolated there despite having people around,no one talks with no one,wich is kinda a good thing because they focus.But I'm thinking of trying Crossfit for the community, although im not sure i like this kind of training,but im considering it.
part time job is a great way to meet people. I've got jobs basically for the social aspect of it. I'm pretty introverted and quiet and got a delivery job at a big employer. I was talking to good looking women daily. I didn't hit on them because of the work thing, but we hung out and got to meet other people. It was easy and natural.
Yeah, this works for people who ran through the instances of a propper socialization and now find themselves in a situation where they leave an old friend group because they've outgrown them or move to a new place e.g. Most people will go through such a situation a few times in their lives but it won't make a big deal as they are used to integrate quickly under new circumstances. However, people who generally feel uncomfortable around those propper socialized ones, especially in groups, need other solutions. Statistically, it's very unlikely for people who have social anxiety, avoidand personality disorder, trauma etc. that causes a lack of social connections, to improve by will. This is, because the premise of such a disorder usually causes subconscious believes and identity traits that have to be displayed by experts first to weaken them. This doesn't mean that it is not one's own responsibility to do something about the problems but the solution is way more complex than just getting into a job, a course or a gym to meet people. And it will definitely take more than one summer to accomplish. It's like putting a dog in an environment of birds. It won't change it's behaviour and grow some wings just because it sees others having them. Exercise needs to be adapted to the circumstances of the individual needs.
man you are taking yourself too seriously. Just force yourself, be disappointed in yourself, think back about those shitty interactions in your bed and grow up that's it. You'll eventually become more confident
@@KokahZ777 Ok, listen: 1) I'm not even in the state where I feel like the fictional person I described, at the moment. I became better at approaching people or laughing about mistakes instead of cringing upon them and have managed to form a little circle of friends and contacts. Not big though, but decent.
2) But I have been there a while ago. And when I was there, the mistake I made was doing the exact same thing, that Denmo suggested - without having seen this particular video of course but plenty of even-minded life coaches who are selling textbook mentality for the wrong audience. I would bet, that 70% of the viewers of this video are at the entirely wrong place, because what they need is a therapist and not someone who tells them they should behave ordinarily and then everything will get better by magic.
3) With that being said, here is what I did (wrong): I forced myself into groups of those people (hard enough during COVID) I've long been afraid of. I went to social events, parties, even a job that required me moving out from home for a while. According to the thesis of this video, this should have made me stronger, right? No, of course not. It only reinforced every inhibition I've ever held towards people. And with the experience I have now, it appears totally obvious to me why.
4) If you have a trauma, a mental disorder, depression or something like that (which I assume the majority of people in the self-help scene have), odds are not likely that it will go away by doing what once caused it, IF you are not aware of your emotional processing, the original source of that emotion and a specific skillset of what to do about. To obtain that skillset you will have to have the right training, which presupposes the right trainer (aka psychiatrist) to recognize what the root of the problem is in the first place, right? And this is why doing all the stuff I've mentioned served me nothing and it will probably not serve the people that consume only self-help videos with no adjusted advice for their individual needs.
5) Arguing with "and grow up that's it" is the exact mindset that inhibits you from becoming actually more aware of yourself and others, because it boils down extremely complex effects to a frustration of not allowing your rationality to put your emotional understanding in a healthy relation to the root of the feeling itself.
6) Finally, that doesn't mean that Denmo's advice is generally bad. A good portion of "fuck off"-mentality can help but it's not suited for you if you have to solve underlying problems first. Do you understand? It's basically the wrong tool for your approach.
@@randommaddlhat7358 Why do you waste so much of your time on stuff that doesn't matter?
@@desty4030 I assume that you didn't even read my text or just the first lines which brings me to the conclusion that it must have triggered your ideology so hard that you "wasted" time as well to write an answer. And now it should become clear to you what my comment actually intended...😂
@@randommaddlhat7358 You sure like to assume a lot
I’m in this stage where I’m on the brink of overhauling a social life based on an experiment that just never worked out. And this is helpful cuz I’ve been wanting to go to a county fair with a friend, but I’ve always been frustrated knowing I don’t really have any. Thing is, I’ve always had people that have liked me but I never tried to connect with them because my mind was always focused on trying to be friends with people who I wasn’t compatible with. If there’s anything I can add, be friends with who comes to you. Beggars can’t be choosers.
I do Uber on Saturday nights and honestly It's been one of the best things i've done to meet new people. I've met so many girls and successfully got their number for future rides. If you're fun and like to talk a lot this has to be the best way imo.
Damn that's actually a decent idea
Do you ask girls out in your car though cos it's kind of a dodgy situation to be in if you're the girl.
She doesn't know you, nor your temperament, so if she rejects you when you ask for her number she could be scared that you get angry and she ends up in a bad spot.
Suppose it'd be fine if you gently suggest that your single and available and leave it up to her to actually say she's interested in you (unfortunately ik not many women will be bold enough to do this).
@@JBry_ I don't go that route as you have a higher chance of rejection. I give them my number for future rides and they reach out to me, once they get comfortable with seeing you more often you ask them out.
@@JeanClaud3 How do you give them future rides? Like you drive them without using Uber?
@@arcticape445 Yea we do cash/etransfer, I make more that way since there's no commission split for uber.
I need this I hate being introverted all the time
time to execute
u in florida by chance?
@@Luruns no texas
Denmo, you can read my mind. That was a video idea that I wanted to share with you today and now you made a video about it. You are amazing ❤
here to help ya G
Winter just started here in Uruguay lol. Summer starts on september.
Bro sounds like hes talking to 3 year olds wtf, like i like your content but G, we aint stupid
most of youtube have the IQ of 3 year olds
@@Denmosocial fair enough, we're all Jeffrey's or whatever. Either way your content is great, especially the 2023 monk mode vid helped a lot. I hope you make more long form content in the future 🙌
Ok but ya bois outta school and he wants to sleep in and stay at home gaming 😭 nah jk thx for the advice keep up the good work
Bold of you to assume I have friends
so make some
@@Denmosocial working on it, your video definitely gave me some great ideas
The older you get, the more you realize friends are not worth investing in. I'm not saying have no friends but only keep a select few people in your life who put a similar effort in. I'm in my late 20's and it seems people are always busy in life and can't even make a bit of time to hang out. Then it turns out most are just at home doing nothing. Focus on yourself first. Get your career going and once you have that going for you. Everything in life follows through. Your meet women once you got money and people will naturally want to be around successful people.
This seems like you are advising people to essentially forget about the social side of life during their 20s which is where most people will have the most fun socially. Surely you should try to focus on both making friends, having fun, and also beginning your career?
@@JBry_ You only got so much time in your life. Not saying you shouldn't have fun with others. Just that friends come and go far more than anything else. Put your energy into something that will give back to you.
@@RedX165 Interesting advice. I think I'm going to try and follow it. Thank you.
@@JBry_ Yep, might sound harsh on paper but its truth to it. They say friends can replace family but the reality is. Friends far too often come and go. Most get a bit busy in life and never even attempt to communicate to you. A simple how you doing text once every few months is too much for some.
Do a little test. Don't communicate to no friends unless they attempt to with you. Give it 6 months. The ones that communicate to you are worth keeping. The ones who ignore you are not.
Funny thing is, those who I don't really even consider my friend I talk to more on a regular basis then those who would be my friend.
PSA: One cold approach led to having a bundle of friends, as of writing this. I talked to chick who sitting next to me and we had a blast of a conversation. At the end of the lecture, we had the same next class (chemistry, ironically, coz we got that chemistry *wink wink) and I met her friends (4 in total) and I had a blast, asked deep questions and everyone seemed happy. I sat next to them and we blew off yet again. Then before class started, there was an empty seat next to me and this chick, who btw I always wanted to talk to and actually know, sat next to me and we blew off as well. And I was to bundle everyone, the 5 girls on my left and the 1 girl on my girl, into one group and just talk and have a great discussion. I'm not going to talk about the day before as it was crazy as today. My confidence? mayn I'm in cloud 20 atp
Do this but not for summer.. how to meet people and make friend circles when youre 25+ with successful career and business
Denim has good advice until he tells you to disregard discipline when it comes to sexual activity then he just tells you to be licentious and never to embrace the virtue of chastity.
I don't think he's religious. I'm Christian, if the advice he gives is against my beliefs then I won't follow it. You don't need to follow everything he says.
@@self-improververy true
what benefit does having discipline with sexual activity have?
@@self-improverhis is exactly what I think about Denmo as well. Second stage, red pill creator. And a very good one at that. The red pill is important to go through as a phase but I think guys like him, HowToBeast, and other red pill creators will have their awakening to god pill very soon. Red pill will solve a lot of human issues but will not solve those that have the depth to reach spirituality. However, this type of advice in self improvement, and even talking to girls (minus the sex) helps guys who are in the camel or first stage.
Maybe catholic priests should embrace the virtue of chastity and stop raping children
I think in the US or Canada it's kinda easier to build new circles than in europe , especially some place of europe more than others
I’m early 20 and I work for a small company with mostly adults who have kids and no time to go out. I need to figure out how to make friends other than work
Yeah. But gym friends are ocassionally friends.
this video filled me with so much rage and anger because all the things he said to do, i feel like i could never not in a million years could do, i suffer from a lot of social anxiety and when i'm in a room with a bunch of people i immediately start to shut down but i feel alone in this world and i don't have any friends and i haven't had girlfriend in 3 years and i've been suicidal for a hot minute now because it's really starting to affect me and really want to do the stuff you mentioned but i just can't, for some reason my stupid peace of shit worthless fucking mind just won't let me.
Same here bro im 25 and never had gf and real friends, i feel like its over, i worked out on my physiquw but have no social skills and skill to find a good job, i only know english and i feel like a loser becsuze what else it is
Dude, you're an entitled brat, because you've HAD a girlfriend, but also take it for granted and proceed to whine and complain. I've never touched or kissed a girl in my entire life (same as many guys out there) and I'm old enough when it seems really weird and exceptional. Go out and solve your problems, dude, you have it better than many of us. You can do it
Why does this video make me so uncomfortable
scared to take action maybe
@@33Danso3x Yes, and not knowing what to say, what to do, how to maintain a friendship, fear of breaking the ice, time management, etc. Shit is hard.
Thank you denmo, I really appreciate this video
send it to your friends
Sup dawg. I've been following you for a minute now, and would like to purchase your course. You plugged in 2 different courses in this video. Which one should I get? What's the difference between the 2? Thx!
Send an email and we can answer any questions
A travel job sounds like a great idea. What's a good website to find these jobs?
the timing of this is nuts
here to help ya
What if you’re too depressed to go out and do things? I’ve forced myself to hang out with people when I’m depressed and all I wanted to do was go home the whole time
You make it look easy cause you're an extrovert. As an introvert being social requires much energy.
try to change your view on this. Find ways how social interaction can bring you energy instead of taking. And don't say that this is impossible cuz you're introvert. Find the way!
Btw once I found really good advice on this thing -- when you go out, go out with intention to have fun. Like, no matter what happens, no matter what mood would guys you hang out with have -- you anyway have fun. Try to implement this mindset.
There’s summer smash this weekend so if I bought tickets already it would’ve been too late to go cuz I
Saw the only day available is Sunday
Why so many people are alone ?
internet is too easily accessible
I met my friends every week for boxing but I wanna meet new people to hangout everyday have fun
How do I build connections, bond, and make jokes? I am loved by everyone, I bring a ton of value, 1/2 the people I can make laugh for days, the other 1/2 do not get it and make me feel awkward. I am ambitious, smart, kind, funny, chill, borderline quiet. To me everyone including work where I have been for a year feels like a stranger, I do not want to hang out because I have not yet gotten anyone to make me want to likely because I have not gotten anyone to open up to me. Also not many people ask me to hang out and I do get awkward in convos from time to time and they sometimes do get dry. I do not know what to do about that. Can we get a video??
Just hang out with the people you click with. You’re not going to be friends with absolutely everyone. Also, maybe they’re awkward, and you aren’t.
Hey man, great video as always. How viable do you think these strategies would be for teens? Gyms and jobs most likely, but I do not know about the other opportunities you mentioned. Thanks dude
Yeah I wanna know as well
Joining clubs is definitely gonna be good. There should be more activities aimed at younger people rather than adults so this will work in your favour.
School clubs that you’re interested in are your best bet, playing sports also helps a lot
Lol. When the video begins with "Wouldn't it be nice to build a whole new social circle?" Resounding NO.
then dont bro
@@Denmosocial Yeah, I mean, my introverted ass can barely manage keeping my existing relationships on a lifeline :D
This is how most people think as well. Like people aren't getting part time jobs to meet fun people, they're getting a part time job because we're in a recession and costs of living are only rising. They are not interested in making friends.
@@katobytesDepends what the job is. Working in a party destination or the busiest part of town at the busiest bars/clubs I'm sure you are going to find a lot of the people who work there do actually want to meet lots of new people and do new stuff with them.
It's freezing this side of the world
👌tnx man you helped me a lot.
First of all thanks for the vedio. I'm from Ottawa, 🇨🇦🇨🇦. So boring city. Nothing to do. People are not very friendly. I work at Downtown. Sometimes I say hi. Girls got angry. Idk why? Their ego goes up😮😮
I have been thinking of joining a german class group, but I'm afraid I'm gonna find only guys like me there! And there's no refund, you have to pay a fine of at least half the semester. And I'm so done of doing things only weird introvert dudes do!
Prior to that, I spent 2 years on an IT course and I didn't make any friends there. I used to think of myself as a shy person until I met those guys.
Can you not get a free taster session for this group to try it out first? Maybe email them and ask. Also, why do you think a class focused on learning German would be full of male introverts?
@@JBry_ cause pretty girls aren't into learning languages, only English.
@@JBry_ and yes, there are free sessions, but you wont get to know who you will be studying with.
@@mannycalavera1848 surely some are?
@@mannycalavera1848 The people who go to the taster session could still be representative of the people who will actually be in the class.
At uni open days for courses you meet people there who are similar to the people who end up taking the course at that uni.
The issue is I’m over 25 now, have a fairly successful career, remote, moneys all set. Is it even worth it to get a low level job like you mentioned, just to build a social circle or meet girls? Also I have a hard time finding a part time job that only works weekends.
You don't need to add a part time job onto your full time job, dude. You need to do what he said, spend time after work meeting new people.
@@-whackdthat's probs gonna be difficult if he has a fully remote job. Not like he's in the office and every1 is off to the pub on a Friday night straight after finishing.
I'd suggest trying to join a few clubs for sports/activities you like and meet like-minded people there.
why couldn't utube recommend this video at the start of my summer holidays it is litreally recommending me a day before when my schools are going to open
But why make a social circle in the first place ?
Selfish reasons? They help you with stuff.
I love this guy
Amazing. I'm going to make a 5 year plan video for you, Denmo.
Oh the first world...
w advice
Very very difficult to make friends let alone build an entire new social circle once you are in your mid to late 30s.
I always knew Gym would be a potentially good option but I can't even do that because I have too many chronic injuries that don't allow me to train.
stop making excuses and figure it out brother you can find a way
My friend group who I mainly party with is mostly guys in our 30s and a couple in early 40s. This is the time when you can use money to take your boat onto an empty end of a lake and host raves where everyone is on MDMA.
I think it starts becoming difficult already when you're 25. But yeah it's particularly difficult after 30 because people have children then.
@@tonyg4058Can you walk or hike?
Thank you!
I love Queens of the Stone Age and Royal Blood..........love the shoutout 😂
new album eh you like it?
@@Denmosocial Big fan of it! Already have it on vinyl. Have you listened to it?
Bro i don't bother trying to achieve anything in life because the next day i could die in a car crash
Indeed , great video. Let the ones complaining is imposible be loosers.
Thanks bro, really helpful video. Quite sad that there is not so much tourists nowadays in Moscow due to well known circumstances, but all other advices that you gave are really applicable. Keep up!
cheers my man
My neighbor always has a bunch of people at his house. I think I'll invite him to grab some cold ones. He's drinks like a fish though and I'm sober now. 😅
Anyone in PA?
Im not introverted. I'm a people person..... I'm just not a stupid people person.
Is that TaySocial you're hanging with?
Nice video as aways my bro
always great videos. Always great advice. Man fawks
Good 👍🏻 stuff jack and hilarious 😂 the same time
"You gonna be extroverted". Yeah.
dropping a comment cause i enjoyed the video
Thank you my brother
i gotchu
Hey Jack appreciate your content. But it always demoralises me when girls say they dont wanna get approached or bothered I do approaches and they go well but never did anything more from there. So is cold approach still relevant in 2023
Girls do want to get approached by guys they like. It's just the same as how guys love to get approached by girls they like.
How do you know if the girls are gonna like you before you approach? In most cases, you can't...so just do it and find out :))
How do you make people worship you?
Ahaha @ 15:20 this dude just chats nonsense
Fuckman i am having 41 degrees in my city
FUCK YEAH, LET'S DO IT GUYS!!!
Yeah, bro. What's really frustrating about your content is that you are exceptionally good at making it sound way easier than it actually is. In fact: I don't know how it is for other guys - but the very reason _why_ I'm here in the first place is that the approaches you mentioned I tried didn't work out well!!
The thing is that in order for those activities to work you need to _be_ a social guy in order for people to want to hang out with you in the first place.. And _that_ would be the real question: _How_ do you become this heartwarming, charismatic, likable guy people want to spend time with, people don't turn down when you try to get them to go out and bring together with other people!?
You (and no other coaches) answer that question..
i am also in the situation that you and a lot of other guys are in socially, but i do feel like I'm improving pretty quickly and hopefully transitioning into that likeable guy. i think the thing that will allow you to improve is practice. if your approaches go badly, you need to learn from failure and try again and again. all difficult things in life are learned through failure. this is especially the case socially, but we all fear failing socially to an irrational degree. you have to let the ego go, even humble people have an ego which is why they try so hard to maintain that status of humility. it's all just a giant game of pretend, it doesn't matter if you fail
@@lukepowers8122 True words, thx a bunch for that! I also feel by now, that it depends to a significant degree to _who_ you meet.
I just recently befriended a group of guys from my gym and with them it just works like a _charm_ because were on the same wavelength.
The ultimate level however is: how do you get to create that vibe with _most_ people, or at least _more_ people, not only the ones that you have the easiest time with (not to say they are easy, but we just have _a lot_ in common, you know what I mean)?
Im 37 working pt at a coffee shop inside a hospital. What do u thinn about a man my age friending younger people. I feel like that branch that isnt pruned. Theyre there so im not gonna NOT be friends but its obviouslt im 15 years older... And yes I do like younger women. It is what it is
Idk how to find ppl my age. I dont necessarily care but i feel like othrt pll do.
Sort of stuck in a weird situation
I'm 22 and just had a rly gr8 time with >20 ppl on a bar crawl where most were 30+. I don't think it's a problem but ik some of my m8s my age would be a bit weirded out by it.
I'd say just don't care about what ppl think. If you and some younger ppl get on, just be friends.
As for meeting ppl ur age, that sounds difficult. Could try bumble for friends with an age limit? Might just have to try lots of different clubs/activities ur interested in until you find ppl uu age that u click with and can start a social circle from there.
@@JBry_ cool to hear that. When I was younger I had several older friends. The only ppl weirded by it were my parents lol
But not guys my age are married w kids. It feels like I missed some sort of invisible deadline and so now it just makes sense to find younger women who love older men and maybe some guy friends in their late late 20s to mid 30,s who arent married. The married w kids thing creates a mild disconnect.
Am leaving thn byeii its rainy season here in india
Denmo please delete the investing spam in the comments
Someone from VIenna who wants to connect?
Denmo here ♥️
Man this is some great advice
Problem with this is that I’m 19, I can barely find girls my age and can’t really date younger or older girls
Not even on dating apps?
Don't use dating apps. Search for a job in a bigger city, and when you find one, move there
perfect timing for this video...right on the money Jack.
Definitely needed this.
This was me in high school and college 🤔🤫
thank you for everything
Wow never this early!
big ups the advice man
how the start businsess with part time job broo
you certainly can, because it is.. *part* time
How can I combine this lifestyle of doing party, meeting friends and chics and doing cool stuff and on the other side going monk mode, crushing my fitness and business goals ect?
Is that even possible? Surely you have to grind one or the other for a while and then reduce intensity to be able to attempt to pursue both at the same time
for example 3 months monk mode, then go more social. Just do one thing after another. You can't go partying and monk mode simultaneously, but you can do them in order
@@huseeads yes that's right. Thanks bro
Think to south emisphere
Good vid 👌
Quest line recovered❤
Thanks!
Addicted to Denmo ✨
I 100% need new friends.
This is VIP
Just the video I need :)
good man
@@Denmosocial good boy (fixed)