Hi there & thanks for watching my video! 🌻🌻 Here's another related video on the topic of men & commitment: 10 Signs of A Commitment Phobic Man. th-cam.com/video/kiOp5tQza7Q/w-d-xo.html
This guy i talked said he didn't want a relationship or to ready to commit due to "trauma" but said he wanna "focus on himself" ( i dont blame him) yet we was doing all of these couple things, he literally said to me "i wouldn't want you either" i'm like okay sir😂 and i just disappeared on him then a month later his text said "hey hope you've been great" i didn't replied. they don't want you but say they "care for you" but wanna keep you around, like don't check up on me, they like control. but don't get mad whenever i get someone else. I'm more than sex and a situationship told him that too.
Funnily, my friends and I were discussing about this topic just yesterday. Then this video popped up on my notification when I opened YT. Everything you say here is correct, Renee. I've heard the same answer from a guy friend I talked to. Thanks much for creating this video. It stung a bit, but it's a wake up to everyone esp. women who are being strung along and are confused about why they're in that situation. You're the best, Renee! 💖💐
Hi lovely Lhara. Thanks for your gracious feedback and support, despite the fact that this may have been difficult for you to process. It's not always easy for me to deliver the content either. Information like this can be jarring! Sending you love and healing as you process this information. Post in the alumni group anytime if you need more support. It's a nice community there. 💜💝
With age and experience, this is where the importance of true groundedness and confidence comes in ... you may have found a wonderful human being in a man but not all those connections are your mate. You have to decide first what you want (ex. Maybe you want a committed relationship now maybe you don’t). If you do, then that’s the filter that applies to your dating. Hard if already a few years into a relationship when you realize this but you have to reset the bar ... kind yet grounded and firm, say to yourself these are my core boundaries for myself and the kind of relationship I want to be in. If the man doesn’t want that, you don’t have an agreement, so then you say thank you next.
Spot on and I agree that core beliefs and boundaries have to be set. Unfortunately, I know someone who says they want a committed relationship, i.e., a "partner", but I all I hear about with her is her having "friends with benefits" over the past 5-6 years I've known her. A few years ago, she hooked up with a guy that she was talking to and, after he revealed he was polyamorous and wanted an "open relationship", she said "this won't work", BUT, she then said "Well, I'd like to stay friends with him" and proceeded to be "friends with benefits" for the next couple years. Eventually, the guy moved on to a relationship with another woman and the woman I know ended up all bummed about it. Meanwhile, I'm sitting here like, "How did you think this was going to end up???". SMH.
I totally agree with what you said here because I am experiencing it. Think I broke it off with this man 20 times at least but always go back to him so I know I'm my own worst enemy. He's a good man but hasn't committed to anyone since his divorce 30 years ago! I know what I have to do, I just have to do it
It's a good thing that you know. Unfortunately the comfort of some situationships keep us going back. Whether it's the attention, the sex, the variety...whatever it may be. We have to decide exactly what our values are and where we want to be in 5 years from now. There's certainly a cost to continually engaging with this man.
It all comes down to what your goals are. Is your goal to find a man with those qualities? What can I do to increase the probability that I will find that again? Always be thinking "what else could I do?"
I think forgetting about it will come after you choose not to forget about it and process it all. It's very painful to be attached to the wrong guy, but we all need help and support to process before we can really move on. The earlier you feel and grieve, generally the faster you can move on.
Renee has a video called how to stay high value when he pulls away. Id check that out to start. It basically comes down to "what you resist, will persist." And resisting what you feel only makes those feelings stronger.
Mind blowing... 🤔Keep you around as a resource. I find that to be true. Not necessarily for sex although yes, but my mind. Information. Tends to ask me a lot of questions. Ugh. Enlightening. Thank you!
it is not for sex immediately but it could potentially lead to sex and for that reason is a resource worth of keeping around, depending of how many free resources (i.e. time) do you have. As a man, having 2 jobs and a small company, it's nearly impossible to "hang around", "netflix and chill" and "court". It has forced me to be blunt as hell, like... it is a go or not? which is something women detest lol.
As someone who is a “player” and only has casual relationships with girls and guys I can tell you I don’t keep them around because I see them as a resource; I keep people around because I like them as a person, and I like having sex with them, and I do not want the relationship to go any further because I am not looking to settle down right now, and I do not think that the person I am seeing has the potential to be a life partner. Something to also consider, men that do not want to progress the relationship with a women any further are going to be guys that have options and have been around - so they are not going to be needy and are only going to settle down with a girl when the time is right and they feel a strong connection.
You have to break the cycle, stay firm, say no, dont give in, move! Guard your heart its the only one you have! Please update me how your doing 2 years later? Did you survive? Did you find true love?
I wonder if anyone else feels like an alien on this planet trying to figure out human behavior. Think I'll just stick to the spiritual journey. Whoever is meant to attach will. 🖖🏾
And men are an even bigger resource to women. We pay ALL the bills and rent without splitting (if he do that's a boy not a man). We protect you physically mentally and spiritually. Women crave stability for themselves and possible children they birth, so men are the priority. Anyone could cook clean and should learn, and if he wants no kids then there's no mutual equal value . Sex work is legal in many places, so the sexual desire is no issue. In fact, on the sex work market you can get what you wish to get, fantasize about etc.
I am just straight up women. I just want a FWB nothing serious. I have managed to keep a 4 to 5 woman rotation over the years. I let women know that if you looking for long term relationship it ain't happening with me
I know a woman who says she wants a partner (monogamous relationship), yet over the past 5-6 years I've known her, all I ever hear about is her having FWB and flings. Incredibly hypocritical.
Renee! You never fail to amaze me 😍❤... it's not just what you say, but the way you deliver your message and the research that goes into creating key content 💞 A'lot of powerful points gone into this video 💯👌 thank God, because you really do help to me to stay grounded ❤🙏 On a final note, would like to add, calming music in the background, great thing to use in the video; it adds a special touch ✨ P.S. you truly are the Queen of Hearts, in my universe 💜♌👑
Bc you’ve slept with too many of them- it’s cheapened and weakens the feeling This is why body count is important- not a good bet for attachment and long term partnership
Hello and thank you for the insight! I am a man who is trying to navigate his feelings about a former lover. I don't think our emotional bond was strong enough before we started having sex. I thought I was in love with this woman, but maybe it was only ever infatuation and a case of the "harem effect" on my part- even though we had agreed to polyamory and weren't having sex anymore.
My man is bisexual and he chops and changed his mind about being with only me and wanting random men sexually! Does the same apply to commitment to a woman, to me?
It's not man or woman dependent - it's dependent on the type of relationship you personally have with him! In other words, whether or not he treats you the way that is described in this video depends on how he sees you and feels about you.
I got a man who’s keeping me around no sex he text me every day good morning and he tell me i love you I ask him why he’s keeping me around he does not answer @thefemininewomanrenee
You have to break the cycle, stay firm, say no, dont give in, move! Guard your heart its the only one you have! Please update me how your doing 2 years later? Are you healing? Did you survive? Did you find true love?
Hi there & thanks for watching my video! 🌻🌻 Here's another related video on the topic of men & commitment: 10 Signs of A Commitment Phobic Man. th-cam.com/video/kiOp5tQza7Q/w-d-xo.html
On becoming his One and only, can it work for a woman that wants a man who is already in a relationship?
@@eneannabelle It can work. It also depends on what type of relationship you're in with him.
This guy i talked said he didn't want a relationship or to ready to commit due to "trauma" but said he wanna "focus on himself" ( i dont blame him) yet we was doing all of these couple things, he literally said to me "i wouldn't want you either" i'm like okay sir😂 and i just disappeared on him then a month later his text said "hey hope you've been great" i didn't replied. they don't want you but say they "care for you" but wanna keep you around, like don't check up on me, they like control. but don't get mad whenever i get someone else.
I'm more than sex and a situationship told him that too.
Because he’s a narcissist and needs supply from as many outlets as he can get. It’s all about resources. My ex calls them “friends”.
Funnily, my friends and I were discussing about this topic just yesterday. Then this video popped up on my notification when I opened YT. Everything you say here is correct, Renee. I've heard the same answer from a guy friend I talked to. Thanks much for creating this video. It stung a bit, but it's a wake up to everyone esp. women who are being strung along and are confused about why they're in that situation. You're the best, Renee! 💖💐
Hi lovely Lhara. Thanks for your gracious feedback and support, despite the fact that this may have been difficult for you to process. It's not always easy for me to deliver the content either. Information like this can be jarring! Sending you love and healing as you process this information. Post in the alumni group anytime if you need more support. It's a nice community there. 💜💝
With age and experience, this is where the importance of true groundedness and confidence comes in ... you may have found a wonderful human being in a man but not all those connections are your mate. You have to decide first what you want (ex. Maybe you want a committed relationship now maybe you don’t). If you do, then that’s the filter that applies to your dating. Hard if already a few years into a relationship when you realize this but you have to reset the bar ... kind yet grounded and firm, say to yourself these are my core boundaries for myself and the kind of relationship I want to be in. If the man doesn’t want that, you don’t have an agreement, so then you say thank you next.
Spot on and I agree that core beliefs and boundaries have to be set. Unfortunately, I know someone who says they want a committed relationship, i.e., a "partner", but I all I hear about with her is her having "friends with benefits" over the past 5-6 years I've known her. A few years ago, she hooked up with a guy that she was talking to and, after he revealed he was polyamorous and wanted an "open relationship", she said "this won't work", BUT, she then said "Well, I'd like to stay friends with him" and proceeded to be "friends with benefits" for the next couple years.
Eventually, the guy moved on to a relationship with another woman and the woman I know ended up all bummed about it. Meanwhile, I'm sitting here like, "How did you think this was going to end up???". SMH.
I totally agree with what you said here because I am experiencing it. Think I broke it off with this man 20 times at least but always go back to him so I know I'm my own worst enemy. He's a good man but hasn't committed to anyone since his divorce 30 years ago! I know what I have to do, I just have to do it
It's a good thing that you know. Unfortunately the comfort of some situationships keep us going back. Whether it's the attention, the sex, the variety...whatever it may be. We have to decide exactly what our values are and where we want to be in 5 years from now. There's certainly a cost to continually engaging with this man.
It all comes down to what your goals are. Is your goal to find a man with those qualities? What can I do to increase the probability that I will find that again? Always be thinking "what else could I do?"
Damn the truth hurts... but it will set you free! 😝
Saw this in passing. A woman is doing this to me too, as a probable source of validation. One answer is - they are a serial manipulator.
Because he's a selfish jerk
Yes
All u said matches what i am thinking.. But just need to know how to move on and forget about it all
I think forgetting about it will come after you choose not to forget about it and process it all. It's very painful to be attached to the wrong guy, but we all need help and support to process before we can really move on. The earlier you feel and grieve, generally the faster you can move on.
Renee has a video called how to stay high value when he pulls away. Id check that out to start. It basically comes down to "what you resist, will persist." And resisting what you feel only makes those feelings stronger.
Mind blowing... 🤔Keep you around as a resource. I find that to be true. Not necessarily for sex although yes, but my mind. Information. Tends to ask me a lot of questions. Ugh. Enlightening. Thank you!
it is not for sex immediately but it could potentially lead to sex and for that reason is a resource worth of keeping around, depending of how many free resources (i.e. time) do you have. As a man, having 2 jobs and a small company, it's nearly impossible to "hang around", "netflix and chill" and "court". It has forced me to be blunt as hell, like... it is a go or not? which is something women detest lol.
As someone who is a “player” and only has casual relationships with girls and guys I can tell you I don’t keep them around because I see them as a resource; I keep people around because I like them as a person, and I like having sex with them, and I do not want the relationship to go any further because I am not looking to settle down right now, and I do not think that the person I am seeing has the potential to be a life partner.
Something to also consider, men that do not want to progress the relationship with a women any further are going to be guys that have options and have been around - so they are not going to be needy and are only going to settle down with a girl when the time is right and they feel a strong connection.
Men don’t keep women around for “information” 😂😂😂🤡
He won’t let go yet won’t let me go...
You have to break the cycle, stay firm, say no, dont give in, move! Guard your heart its the only one you have! Please update me how your doing 2 years later? Did you survive? Did you find true love?
I wonder if anyone else feels like an alien on this planet trying to figure out human behavior. Think I'll just stick to the spiritual journey. Whoever is meant to attach will. 🖖🏾
And men are an even bigger resource to women. We pay ALL the bills and rent without splitting (if he do that's a boy not a man). We protect you physically mentally and spiritually. Women crave stability for themselves and possible children they birth, so men are the priority. Anyone could cook clean and should learn, and if he wants no kids then there's no mutual equal value . Sex work is legal in many places, so the sexual desire is no issue. In fact, on the sex work market you can get what you wish to get, fantasize about etc.
I was literally clapping when you said "to show up as the one and only" woman. Haha! Love ur vids, Renee!
I am just straight up women. I just want a FWB nothing serious. I have managed to keep a 4 to 5 woman rotation over the years. I let women know that if you looking for long term relationship it ain't happening with me
I know a woman who says she wants a partner (monogamous relationship), yet over the past 5-6 years I've known her, all I ever hear about is her having FWB and flings. Incredibly hypocritical.
Renee! You never fail to amaze me 😍❤... it's not just what you say, but the way you deliver your message and the research that goes into creating key content 💞
A'lot of powerful points gone into this video 💯👌 thank God, because you really do help to me to stay grounded ❤🙏
On a final note, would like to add, calming music in the background, great thing to use in the video; it adds a special touch ✨
P.S. you truly are the Queen of Hearts, in my universe 💜♌👑
Aw, thanks Holly!! Appreciate your feedback and kind words. You are a queen yourself!! 💜👑
@@renee_wade from the heart and soul, Renee 💖💜 I will never stop appreciating who you are 💌💐🌹💌
Feeling privileged beyond measure, by you kind words 🌈💓
Hmm I'm a woman but having sex never made me have stronger feelings for a man.
Bc you’ve slept with too many of them- it’s cheapened and weakens the feeling
This is why body count is important- not a good bet for attachment and long term partnership
Not true, I had sex with my tutor , for a couple of months.... It hurt cause everytime a relationship ends is annoying and sucks. But quick felt ok
Hello and thank you for the insight! I am a man who is trying to navigate his feelings about a former lover. I don't think our emotional bond was strong enough before we started having sex. I thought I was in love with this woman, but maybe it was only ever infatuation and a case of the "harem effect" on my part- even though we had agreed to polyamory and weren't having sex anymore.
Hi renee
I love you and i love your vedios
How to know he wants to attach to me, i mean what are the signs or hints that he's serious
Sounds like my friend. There is no sex though.
Love the Eminem reference 😆
My man is bisexual and he chops and changed his mind about being with only me and wanting random men sexually! Does the same apply to commitment to a woman, to me?
It's not man or woman dependent - it's dependent on the type of relationship you personally have with him! In other words, whether or not he treats you the way that is described in this video depends on how he sees you and feels about you.
LMFAOOOO date a man that is not gay. Wtf you doing?
I got a man who’s keeping me around no sex he text me every day good morning and he tell me i love you I ask him why he’s keeping me around he does not answer @thefemininewomanrenee
You have to break the cycle, stay firm, say no, dont give in, move! Guard your heart its the only one you have! Please update me how your doing 2 years later? Are you healing? Did you survive? Did you find true love?