Conan Catches Jordan Schlansky Coming In Late | CONAN on TBS

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 28 ธ.ค. 2024

ความคิดเห็น • 10K

  • @samflynn97
    @samflynn97 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5060

    6:56 "You're not making eye contact with me."
    "Why would I?"
    This man has a lot of experience with interrogations...

    • @nicomas2471
      @nicomas2471 5 ปีที่แล้ว +31

      omg didn't notice that, thanks lol

    • @Tyler-eq6hp
      @Tyler-eq6hp 5 ปีที่แล้ว +78

      It's part of his various roles and responsibilities

    • @marisad9856
      @marisad9856 5 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @@Tyler-eq6hp various...lol

    • @danieldmyers
      @danieldmyers 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      420 basically abusing him? Yeesh. Get a boss.

    • @marcogiordano1207
      @marcogiordano1207 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@danieldmyers work alone. Thats better

  • @t.p.w.6343
    @t.p.w.6343 5 ปีที่แล้ว +32753

    This video is a gateway drug into Jordan Schlansky Saga.

    • @dabbyt3800
      @dabbyt3800 5 ปีที่แล้ว +49

      Tayna Weher yes it is 😂😂

    • @aryanrana6369
      @aryanrana6369 5 ปีที่แล้ว +87

      For me it is the end coz ive seen all the others already

    • @mumin9436
      @mumin9436 5 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Yes yes yes 😂👌

    • @GS-kj6ur
      @GS-kj6ur 5 ปีที่แล้ว +45

      Just joined today these are hilarious

    • @michaelheath2866
      @michaelheath2866 5 ปีที่แล้ว +26

      Yeap, I've seen all of them, and I keep Jonesing for more.

  • @victor_r.m
    @victor_r.m 5 ปีที่แล้ว +17249

    He got him with that “I’ve worked for a living”😂

    • @nurmadihahbintizulkifli1734
      @nurmadihahbintizulkifli1734 5 ปีที่แล้ว +576

      that is such a good roast, i love that 😂

    • @trainofaaron
      @trainofaaron 5 ปีที่แล้ว +136

      In the 19th century

    • @user-xs3og8us3d
      @user-xs3og8us3d 4 ปีที่แล้ว +88

      So glad I am unemployed.

    • @samthoeung4382
      @samthoeung4382 4 ปีที่แล้ว +55

      @@user-xs3og8us3d lol u wont when u out on the streets

    • @doritogamingyt
      @doritogamingyt 4 ปีที่แล้ว +95

      @@NealJett you must be fun at parties

  • @gabriellex6142
    @gabriellex6142 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2573

    This is an all-time classic! 9 years later and I still revisit this piece of art from time to time!!

    • @masimmomasimmo
      @masimmomasimmo ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Same ❤

    • @Dee010s
      @Dee010s ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Me too. love that personal espresso machine bit n the free food

    • @hypergolic8468
      @hypergolic8468 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      "You know how I knew it was the centre.... I've worked for a living" classic 🤣🤣😂😂

    • @erikrojas8906
      @erikrojas8906 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Same ♥

    • @edwardbennett959
      @edwardbennett959 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Same here!

  • @chsandstrom
    @chsandstrom 5 ปีที่แล้ว +16082

    ”My lack of awareness of the time is not responsible for the hour that I arrive in the office”

    • @pillar350
      @pillar350 5 ปีที่แล้ว +301

      Mirk Jerken best line ever

    • @angieb976
      @angieb976 5 ปีที่แล้ว +531

      They need to make a movie and have a douchie character inspired by this guy with this guys lines

    • @Standin.Fallen
      @Standin.Fallen 5 ปีที่แล้ว +170

      I should use this in school

    • @castlehill6717
      @castlehill6717 5 ปีที่แล้ว +145

      Low key sick line, lol

    • @yalamburrrr
      @yalamburrrr 5 ปีที่แล้ว +67

      Low key a bar

  • @PrettyProChannel
    @PrettyProChannel 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5844

    "Remove your shirt. What part of your body did you shave?"
    "My face."

    • @seanA416
      @seanA416 3 ปีที่แล้ว +233

      "What about down south?"
      "That's private."
      "But you just took off your shirt"

    • @FriendlyCroock
      @FriendlyCroock 3 ปีที่แล้ว +36

      @@seanA416
      You don't need to quote the entire thing.

    • @mikrogoon
      @mikrogoon 3 ปีที่แล้ว +32

      "I'm just asking if you shave your John Dory, do you?

    • @myy1008
      @myy1008 3 ปีที่แล้ว +56

      @@FriendlyCroock you're part of the problem

    • @Hchris101
      @Hchris101 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      I hug fully clothed grandmas

  • @RG-vp6br
    @RG-vp6br 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4581

    “What do you think the human response would be ?” Hahah

    • @alex_lomov
      @alex_lomov 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      "the"

    • @primtve_dope9568
      @primtve_dope9568 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@alex_lomov what?

    • @tildaheart3372
      @tildaheart3372 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      THEY ARE LEARNING, THE "JORDANS" ARE LEARNING!!!!

  • @DanFlashes99
    @DanFlashes99 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2967

    "I've been experimenting with oats and whey" is one of the funniest lines ever uttered on this show

    • @joliecide
      @joliecide 2 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      Maybe he was curious...

    • @alexanderdeadmansche
      @alexanderdeadmansche ปีที่แล้ว +26

      Hilarious that he goes into so much detail

    • @YhormTheGiant1
      @YhormTheGiant1 ปีที่แล้ว +37

      Sounds like Patrick Bateman haha

    • @timy9197
      @timy9197 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +16

      But did you know that he prepares his body in various ways?

    • @Thomas-ib8fe
      @Thomas-ib8fe 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +25

      Very few people noticed he emphasizes "immediately" as if he quite literally immediately as he wakes up reaches to his side and drinks a prepared shake!

  • @PantheonContent
    @PantheonContent 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1983

    "I Prepared my body in various ways" is the best quote ever.

    • @gfox9295
      @gfox9295 5 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      And so useful in so very many possible situations!

    • @MrTruth111
      @MrTruth111 4 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      lol that response will certainly stop any further questioning about being late

  • @entertain7us148
    @entertain7us148 5 ปีที่แล้ว +7534

    "you've studied humans on our planet for a while"

    • @BlueEyes-WhiteDrag0n
      @BlueEyes-WhiteDrag0n 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@exorbitantmango200 reply*

    • @Overneed-Belkan-Witch
      @Overneed-Belkan-Witch 5 ปีที่แล้ว +58

      Well, he's half Vulcan and Half Italian

    • @drinkwater247
      @drinkwater247 5 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      His true boss is mark zucc, and we all know it

    • @tastytizzler1383
      @tastytizzler1383 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@BlueEyes-WhiteDrag0n you made that guy delete his comment 😂

  • @neo3888
    @neo3888 6 ปีที่แล้ว +13469

    Jordan Schlansky - The only person who could pull off being a nerd, a creep, a robot, and a douchebag all at the same time

    • @orpa007
      @orpa007 6 ปีที่แล้ว +256

      Therefore I love him!

    • @yellowblanka6058
      @yellowblanka6058 6 ปีที่แล้ว +41

      Hahaha, dead on.

    • @sammie5758
      @sammie5758 6 ปีที่แล้ว +146

      And a cutieeee

    • @Fifthelement203
      @Fifthelement203 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      wite faec 😂😂😂😂

    • @MoralMonster
      @MoralMonster 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      😂😂😂

  • @samfilmkid
    @samfilmkid 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1765

    The cocktail of giddiness, amazement and murderous rage on Conan's face when he realizes the gold mine of comedy he has discovered right under his nose is the most underrated part of this video.

    • @hellterminator
      @hellterminator ปีที่แล้ว +42

      Sorry, but you're just reading too much into it. Conan didn't discover anything here, he had been doing Jordan remotes even back in New York.

    • @maulds7650
      @maulds7650 ปีที่แล้ว +52

      @@hellterminator Every segment he does with Jordan is like that though, that's why every segment is an escalation

  • @AishwaryaNet
    @AishwaryaNet 5 ปีที่แล้ว +8140

    "Then I prepared my body in various ways" 🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂

    • @rjharris1960
      @rjharris1960 5 ปีที่แล้ว +100

      Who talks like that?

    • @mant555
      @mant555 5 ปีที่แล้ว +26

      @@willarduswonkituss305 Im dying

    • @psychoaztecs
      @psychoaztecs 5 ปีที่แล้ว +48

      i'm gonna be borrowing that quote from now on.

    • @Strimlarn87
      @Strimlarn87 5 ปีที่แล้ว +50

      Everything he does is various.

    • @whatwouldtarado213
      @whatwouldtarado213 5 ปีที่แล้ว +33

      PATRICK BATEMAN!

  • @URAWESOME94
    @URAWESOME94 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2017

    The blank, lifeless look on his face along with his monotone speaking absolutely kills me every time. I’ve only recently found this vids and they’re pure gold.

    • @largol33t1
      @largol33t1 4 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      I love when Conan goes out on "field trips" and drags Jordan with him. They're the modern day version of Stan & Ollie! 😁

    • @gikgik4254
      @gikgik4254 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Probably Xanax or oxys

    • @Psydvckthefirst
      @Psydvckthefirst ปีที่แล้ว

      @@gikgik4254 5 years in a good improv theater

    • @mahalalel27
      @mahalalel27 ปีที่แล้ว

      Blessed is the man that trusteth in the Lord,
      and whose hope the Lord is.
      For he shall be as a tree planted by the waters,
      and that spreadeth out her roots by the river,
      and shall not see when heat cometh,
      but her leaf shall be green;
      and shall not be careful in the year of drought,
      neither shall cease from yielding fruit.
      Jeremiah 17:7-8 💙✨

    • @URAWESOME94
      @URAWESOME94 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@mahalalel27 that has absolutely nothing to do with my three year old comment.

  • @Trevor_on_Youtube
    @Trevor_on_Youtube 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2685

    Jordan sounds like he walked into “To Catch a Predator”

    • @quchi7232
      @quchi7232 5 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      this comment got me. Lmao

    • @ryancourt8065
      @ryancourt8065 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Would be funny if Chris Hansen was there...

    • @DK-uj1er
      @DK-uj1er 5 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      ‘Prepared my body in various ways’

    • @mekaniklboltmb4880
      @mekaniklboltmb4880 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Would you please have a seat

    • @cookingwithlove6313
      @cookingwithlove6313 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Hahahaha....LOL

  • @astroloudboy
    @astroloudboy ปีที่แล้ว +2191

    3:11 *Jordan showing his card like it's FBI badge had me rolling* 😂

    • @jesssss12
      @jesssss12 ปีที่แล้ว +80

      😂 it’s straight from an FBI movie

    • @santibarbarulo7446
      @santibarbarulo7446 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Could u tell me what the had me rolling expression is please?

    • @jeremiahking2072
      @jeremiahking2072 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      ​@@santibarbarulo7446laughing hard is what it means

    • @karlebersberger2835
      @karlebersberger2835 ปีที่แล้ว +24

      ​@@georgecampbell349Schlansky. Jordan Schlansky.

    • @09tgfl81
      @09tgfl81 9 หลายเดือนก่อน

      😂

  • @SmylzMuzik
    @SmylzMuzik 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3721

    Conan: okay jordan, no matter what you do, you're gonna keep your job, BUT i get to make fun of you publicly in front of millions of people.
    Jordan: I accept this pact as a form of intellectual rebellion.

  • @txmoney
    @txmoney 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3187

    “I’ve worked for a living”. That was savage!

    • @ExileOnDaytonStreet
      @ExileOnDaytonStreet 5 ปีที่แล้ว +44

      txmoney That was glorious

    • @LordLazo
      @LordLazo 5 ปีที่แล้ว +72

      txmoney
      Jordan got murdered on that one

    • @mrjack8849
      @mrjack8849 5 ปีที่แล้ว +45

      Even my mom in her 60s laughed at that.

    • @OMW-on4vk
      @OMW-on4vk 5 ปีที่แล้ว +61

      It’s true as well, Conan got screwed a lot of times before and he always refused to give up and always come out on top

    • @googelle7555
      @googelle7555 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      I've watched and laughed at this part so many times, which now makes me wonder .. I wonder what Jordan did for a living before Conan.
      #toolazytowikisearch

  • @jasminkhangura3832
    @jasminkhangura3832 8 ปีที่แล้ว +6794

    I am just discovering the miracle that is Jordan Schlansky. Binge witching what I've missed all these years

  • @andrewfroese1067
    @andrewfroese1067 ปีที่แล้ว +722

    “You put the time card in the middle. Do you know how I know? I’ve worked for a living.”
    Conan throwing shade at Jordan is the best.

  • @jeremiahhyslip5803
    @jeremiahhyslip5803 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4689

    Anyone else notice at 8:27 that Jordan’s office plaque says “One Cranky Fake Italian”??

    • @Mauro0
      @Mauro0 4 ปีที่แล้ว +78

      Nice catch!!

    • @solkels_z4794
      @solkels_z4794 4 ปีที่แล้ว +163

      also is that the 500 dollar espresso machine in the back? 4:10

    • @MeMe-td1ye
      @MeMe-td1ye 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Where??

    • @jeremiahhyslip5803
      @jeremiahhyslip5803 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      @@MeMe-td1ye The sign right next to his head! Can be seen clearly if you pause at 8:29

    • @MeMe-td1ye
      @MeMe-td1ye 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@jeremiahhyslip5803 in Italian??

  • @ragerodracir
    @ragerodracir 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3176

    he just stands in his office, shirtless in front of his boss, with his hands in his pockets

    • @ASHISHPATEL-ot3lu
      @ASHISHPATEL-ot3lu 5 ปีที่แล้ว +303

      Wearing a pair of sunglasses

    • @ohhhboyyy7625
      @ohhhboyyy7625 5 ปีที่แล้ว +325

      While he explains how he prepares his body in various ways

    • @Teck0ne1
      @Teck0ne1 5 ปีที่แล้ว +128

      In such a monotone voice ...

    • @geo865833
      @geo865833 5 ปีที่แล้ว +147

      If that is not badassery, then I don't know what is.

    • @lacrospilacrospi3465
      @lacrospilacrospi3465 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Fired

  • @supermigit999
    @supermigit999 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9457

    One day Conan is going to go missing, and we will all know who did it.

    • @PANDA_SPEAKS101
      @PANDA_SPEAKS101 4 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Ha

    • @Umoade
      @Umoade 4 ปีที่แล้ว +34

      And no one will tell

    • @zacheryjequinto7259
      @zacheryjequinto7259 3 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      That day will be in June

    • @philb6133
      @philb6133 3 ปีที่แล้ว +68

      We haven’t seen Jordan in awhile, maybe Conan killed him first.

    • @jinxjaws
      @jinxjaws 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      But there will be no proof!

  • @ern1982
    @ern1982 3 ปีที่แล้ว +363

    "I prepare my body in various ways" is iconic at this point

    • @NiVi192
      @NiVi192 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      Somebody's gotta put that on the back of a t-shirt!

  • @asemfarouk9741
    @asemfarouk9741 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6390

    Conan: “you’re not making eye contact with me”
    Jordan: WHY WOULD I?

    • @glp046
      @glp046 3 ปีที่แล้ว +304

      I think he avoids eye contact with Conan When he's on the verge of cracking up.

    • @LastLighthouse
      @LastLighthouse 3 ปีที่แล้ว +121

      Unlike Ellen, Conan invites eye contact from his employees

    • @joyandpeacefullaughter5307
      @joyandpeacefullaughter5307 3 ปีที่แล้ว +95

      @@glp046 Or he's just super introverted. I hate eye contact. It's useless to me.

    • @lukebennett1648
      @lukebennett1648 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      @@joyandpeacefullaughter5307 me too

    • @clamdigger1602
      @clamdigger1602 3 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      @@joyandpeacefullaughter5307 Well, he's acting, but you should get over that because it's not a good look in job interviews, etc. (no pun intended)

  • @kgisabeast
    @kgisabeast 5 ปีที่แล้ว +7117

    Conan is hands down the funniest late night host. He’s actually a comedy genius. He even wrote a lot of the golden era simpsons episodes

    • @exildur
      @exildur 5 ปีที่แล้ว +211

      Wow, I had to look this up to confirm. I never knew that! Now I like Conan even more!!

    • @misskorah4291
      @misskorah4291 5 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Lukas ANDY RICHTER IS WAY FUNNIER THAN CONAN.

    • @yeltsin6817
      @yeltsin6817 5 ปีที่แล้ว +104

      His IQ is apparently very high

    • @futuropasado
      @futuropasado 5 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      what episodes¿¿??? i want to know

    • @adgato75
      @adgato75 5 ปีที่แล้ว +99

      @@futuropasado You'd have to look it up , but apparently he ended up very influential on The Simpsons. From what I have read , Conan was the main motivator for taking the show from a boring animated sitcom ( which it was , early on ) to a more interesting kinda crazy version with strange episodes. I think people point to the Monorail episode as being when that shift started to take place.

  • @Kvmilla
    @Kvmilla 8 ปีที่แล้ว +8751

    "I've worked for a living" THE SHADE

    • @manictiger
      @manictiger 7 ปีที่แล้ว +306

      Step 1: Fold ice pack until you hear a crunch sound
      Step 2: Apply ice pack to affected burn area

    • @cod-slayer2697
      @cod-slayer2697 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      Kvmilla 4

    • @um-mr9jf
      @um-mr9jf 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Kvmilla I don't get it

    • @MarcHershey
      @MarcHershey 6 ปีที่แล้ว +62

      He didn't even do it correctly lol the sheet is to go sideways LOL

    • @NattyMattyD
      @NattyMattyD 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Kvmilla i

  • @channelmixer
    @channelmixer 3 ปีที่แล้ว +426

    I swear I was depressed in early February and then I discovered and binge watch all of the Conan and Jordan videos and my depression lifted. I am being serious! Conan rocks!

    • @sofiesummerbradley
      @sofiesummerbradley 3 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      Listen to his podcast and you will fully overcome depression 😇

    • @Joedirt3349
      @Joedirt3349 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Better than Prozac!

    • @michaelscottoriginal
      @michaelscottoriginal 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Hope you are doing well now

    • @Gurra88
      @Gurra88 ปีที่แล้ว

      *feeling blue

  • @michaelbross5687
    @michaelbross5687 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3557

    He looks like the kind of guy who would try to avoid synthetic maltodextrin.

    • @jayweatherbee8666
      @jayweatherbee8666 5 ปีที่แล้ว +28

      Most under rated comment on the internet yet.

    • @michaelbross5687
      @michaelbross5687 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Jay Weatherbee thank you 😂

    • @nataliaa.1094
      @nataliaa.1094 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      😂

    • @littlered6340
      @littlered6340 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      😂 😂 😂

    • @seanmatthewking
      @seanmatthewking 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      You look like the type of person who actively takes synthetic maltodextrin.

  • @herropreaseherro7870
    @herropreaseherro7870 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5758

    Meanwhile, Sona just finished four seasons of Friends

    • @keithpatrick156
      @keithpatrick156 3 ปีที่แล้ว +194

      She prepared her mind in various ways. Watched "Friends"...."Gigolos"...

    • @ligregni
      @ligregni 3 ปีที่แล้ว +73

      but she got to the office on time

    • @firecrackerjack68
      @firecrackerjack68 3 ปีที่แล้ว +64

      @@ligregni but Jordan has various tasks and duties as an associate producer.

    • @tonypele7054
      @tonypele7054 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      🤣🤣

    • @neldormiveglia1312
      @neldormiveglia1312 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      @@ligregni uh yeah, you gotta start your series marathons early

  • @adiantum7124
    @adiantum7124 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2282

    4:57 "I prepared my body in various ways"
    the words hit my brain that is my best words what I had ever heard... Jorden you re genius

    • @davec3651
      @davec3651 3 ปีที่แล้ว +42

      It totally applies to us all though. It can mean anything from eating breakfast to washing hands, or exercising. "Various" really is a magical word.

    • @VERSACE.1X
      @VERSACE.1X 3 ปีที่แล้ว +43

      your words hurt my brain reading this comment

    • @David-tq8ok
      @David-tq8ok 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      @@VERSACE.1X various words

    • @peteralbrecht473
      @peteralbrecht473 2 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Isn't that a quote from American Psycho?

    • @alexanderdeadmansche
      @alexanderdeadmansche ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Such a funny way of putting it. I also love that he has to include the fact that he’s been experimenting with oats and whey

  • @EnterShikari777
    @EnterShikari777 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +51

    The part when Conan says “You’re not making eye contact with me” and Jordan’s response is “Why would I?” always kills me

  • @dpatel313
    @dpatel313 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2511

    How a human would say , "got ready"?
    "Prepared my body in various ways"
    Nailed it 👍

    • @jsmall10671
      @jsmall10671 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Yeah, he's cheating.

    • @spyninja1456
      @spyninja1456 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

      AI generated man

  • @davidpulatov9987
    @davidpulatov9987 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5748

    Judge: you're still looking at 6 years
    6ix9ine: do you know what Jordan does on Friday’s?

  • @WineProneCowboy
    @WineProneCowboy 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4758

    I just noticed that Jordan is wearing a Google t-shirt in this video. Proof that he is late to work on Fridays because he has to go to a Google lab first for his weekly recalibration?

    • @rosieej5267
      @rosieej5267 3 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Will you explain that please?

    • @szepi79
      @szepi79 3 ปีที่แล้ว +180

      @@rosieej5267 the butt of the joke is that Jordan isn't human, but a prototype robot, who needs to be recalibrated to fool the regular humans.

    • @Muzical-Man
      @Muzical-Man 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Yeah I think your right. Jordon must be a robot because he’s emotionless, stubborn, stiff and a creep. Elon Musk may be a robot too

    • @dacsus
      @dacsus 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      @@szepi79 It looks like Rosiee J is also going to get recalibrated...

    • @CalvinJary
      @CalvinJary 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Clearly they have work to do if a freshly calibrated Jordan acts like that.

  • @catdaddydonbrewer007
    @catdaddydonbrewer007 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1135

    Conan will go down in history as the all time funniest talk show host in the history of television!

    • @belltolls1984
      @belltolls1984 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Absolutely!

    • @iPlayDotaReligiously
      @iPlayDotaReligiously 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Agree 💯

    • @alru5792
      @alru5792 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Conan is pretty funny, but definitely NOT one of the best ever.

    • @catdaddydonbrewer007
      @catdaddydonbrewer007 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      @@alru5792 name 3 living talk show host that are better and name 3 dead talk show host better. Cause there’s only been maybe 20 relevant known talkshow host ever.

    • @maly_bobon3352
      @maly_bobon3352 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@catdaddydonbrewer007 eric andre

  • @Joey_Shepard
    @Joey_Shepard 5 ปีที่แล้ว +794

    3:29 Love how Jordan casually throws his jacket at his pile of crap

    • @gogogoooooooooo
      @gogogoooooooooo 5 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      We don’t see it, but there’s actually an open couch behind the boxes lmao.

    • @Amoogus
      @Amoogus 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Shepard

  • @anthonysclafani3963
    @anthonysclafani3963 7 ปีที่แล้ว +3382

    "In case he ever makes a friend"

  • @hidayatghozali
    @hidayatghozali 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2104

    8:29 the sign to his office says "Jordan Schlansky One Cranky Fake Italian"

    • @wondrouswisdom8387
      @wondrouswisdom8387 5 ปีที่แล้ว +24

      Omg, I never noticed! 🤣🤣🤣

    • @twilightzone1805
      @twilightzone1805 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      OMG I never noticed ...

    • @LonesomeBossDaily
      @LonesomeBossDaily 5 ปีที่แล้ว +34

      He ride a vespa, drink expresso, has olive oil and pepper in his office that is very Italian

    • @prolly537
      @prolly537 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@LonesomeBossDaily he used to ride a vespa

    • @twitterodammit5082
      @twitterodammit5082 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@prolly537 what happened

  • @GammaX13
    @GammaX13 3 ปีที่แล้ว +770

    "I've been experimenting with oats and whey"
    "I prepared my body in various ways"
    This is a great first episode of the Jordan Schlansky Saga

    • @user-bz7hz4jl1t
      @user-bz7hz4jl1t ปีที่แล้ว +7

      I think the character originated earlier, but good intro to the character nonetheless

    • @mahalalel27
      @mahalalel27 ปีที่แล้ว

      Therefore whosoever heareth these sayings of mine, and doeth them, I will liken him unto a wise man, which built his house upon a rock:
      And the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat upon that house; and it fell not: for it was founded upon a rock.
      And every one that heareth these sayings of mine, and doeth them not, shall be likened unto a foolish man, which built his house upon the sand:
      And the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat upon that house; and it fell: and great was the fall of it.
      Matthew 7:24-27 💙✨

    • @alecedgerly1277
      @alecedgerly1277 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Yeah, this is where you’re really gonna save ‘em lmao, in the comments section of a youtube video.

    • @stormrevenant
      @stormrevenant ปีที่แล้ว +2

      It's not the first episode, the first episodes were meeting Jordan, house hunting with Jordan, Conan and Jordan visits Italian restaurant, and coffee machine.

  • @Dmdm_dm
    @Dmdm_dm 5 ปีที่แล้ว +8289

    Is no one gonna comment that Jordan is amazingly fit for a guy in his 40s?

    • @sjrn24
      @sjrn24 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3025

      That's what you get when you experiment with oats and whey

    • @Smurffitness
      @Smurffitness 5 ปีที่แล้ว +443

      not sure if amazing is the word. dude just takes care himself.

    • @Dmdm_dm
      @Dmdm_dm 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1257

      @@Smurffitness Having a sixpack and virtually no fat on your body in your 40s is an amazing achievement. I bet you that only 1% of people in their 40s have a body like that.

    • @davecolvin7969
      @davecolvin7969 5 ปีที่แล้ว +86

      Or maybe you're just a mess

    • @Dmdm_dm
      @Dmdm_dm 5 ปีที่แล้ว +427

      @@davecolvin7969 I bet Jordan's way fitter than you

  • @stevesalazar7857
    @stevesalazar7857 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3736

    Immediately after Jordan says "I prepare my body in various ways" I literally paused the video, laughed, and said out loud "this isn't scripted?"
    Then I resume the video and Conan says "I want to tell the audience this isn't scripted. This is really happening" hahaha

    • @namaloompakistani1768
      @namaloompakistani1768 3 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      What does it mean? Prepare my body in various ways

    • @sirrismendozasunlessrealms5775
      @sirrismendozasunlessrealms5775 3 ปีที่แล้ว +68

      @@namaloompakistani1768 It could mean like how some people use olive oil before a sex session,
      going swimming,
      to the spa.
      Different scenarios where you could just assume funny things.

    • @platinumpineapple9943
      @platinumpineapple9943 3 ปีที่แล้ว +93

      brush your teeth, use the bathroom, put on deodorant does anyone have common sense

    • @StephanieVeeMusic
      @StephanieVeeMusic 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

    • @atlantis5001
      @atlantis5001 2 ปีที่แล้ว +77

      @@platinumpineapple9943 Yeah we understand what he meant, but nobody calls mourning routine "preparing your body in various ways" 😆

  • @ellisguerrero212
    @ellisguerrero212 6 ปีที่แล้ว +3578

    *"I PREPARED MY BODY IN VARIOUS WAYS"*

    • @b15cowboy75
      @b15cowboy75 6 ปีที่แล้ว +49

      Ellis Guerrero dude looks strong tho

    • @nellerboy2000
      @nellerboy2000 6 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Various

    • @o.a.47
      @o.a.47 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      666th like

    • @shantellsimms3860
      @shantellsimms3860 6 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      He always various ways and I laugh everytime he is funny 🤣😂🤣

    • @schprox
      @schprox 6 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      I touch my body in various ways

  • @allison1507
    @allison1507 3 ปีที่แล้ว +391

    Who else is here rewatching these after finding out Conan is ending his late night show?

    • @sunritroykarmakar4406
      @sunritroykarmakar4406 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      me

    • @georgieacero7043
      @georgieacero7043 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      WHAT NO

    • @12structures
      @12structures 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      so sad. I don't get why, other than them forcing him out, Im assuming because he wont' ago along with these late night 'hosts' agenda, aka Team Biden / Communism affiliates such as Kimmel, Seth, Colbert, etc..

    • @xxwhispersxx2856
      @xxwhispersxx2856 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      12structures, he got another show on HBO, and HBO pays a hell of a lot more. Follow the money.

    • @arthursdl
      @arthursdl 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      @@12structures I hope you make a friend one day

  • @SonOfMuta
    @SonOfMuta 8 ปีที่แล้ว +2892

    "Know how I know it was the center? Because I've worked for a living." I believe the mic has been dropped

    • @kinglyyasin5985
      @kinglyyasin5985 8 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      ikr

    • @roba6356
      @roba6356 8 ปีที่แล้ว +71

      Best part of the skit

    • @MrGbounds
      @MrGbounds 8 ปีที่แล้ว +95

      That was one of those savage moments that you just don't cross. Lol

    • @UseToPewProfessionally
      @UseToPewProfessionally 8 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      The Son of Muta that part killed me ha!

    • @harryscheuerle659
      @harryscheuerle659 7 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      except that he didn't tell him he had to punch it sideways. so im not sure hes ever used one

  • @stormwatcheagle5448
    @stormwatcheagle5448 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3193

    This man is a vulcan. There is a starship somewhere missing its science officer.

    • @brucewayne4483
      @brucewayne4483 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Lmfao!!!

    • @leoscorpio42
      @leoscorpio42 4 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      Evan Reeves "...without taking up an inordinate amount of desk space." = Yeah, Vulcan makes sense.

    • @googleuser2874
      @googleuser2874 4 ปีที่แล้ว +23

      He's the human version of Spock.

    • @WizardOnAWhale7
      @WizardOnAWhale7 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      I definitely get a Tuvok vibe from him.

    • @roguesheep3083
      @roguesheep3083 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Apparently, it's an act, but he is only exxagerating his actual self.

  • @PoTato-wk8gh
    @PoTato-wk8gh 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2305

    I can't believe this isn't scripted...pure gold

    • @francescomarialeo
      @francescomarialeo 6 ปีที่แล้ว +230

      Jordan is a character but nothing is predefined. It 's half true

    • @Peter_1986
      @Peter_1986 6 ปีที่แล้ว +36

      +Po Tato
      I personally think that that's the only way to really make a conversation sound natural - most movies have a very distinct "acting feel" to them since the actors have to follow scripts, and it will typically sound a lot more natural if you let the actors improvise their lines.
      It may be less practical, but it will feel more genuine and "real".

    • @BlueEyes-WhiteDrag0n
      @BlueEyes-WhiteDrag0n 6 ปีที่แล้ว +45

      Just search *Jordan Schlasky Breaking Character*
      _It's just that he is playing a Role of a Weird Human. But in reality he also is just a Simple guy who laughs at Conan's Jokes. But don't watch the video or you might not feel the Humour in these videos anymore_

    • @jason2014
      @jason2014 6 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      @@francescomarialeo To think this isn't scripted is a lie to yourself and your own dignity.

    • @charlesxav6817
      @charlesxav6817 6 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      I personally believe it’s not scripted, and that Jordan wasn’t notified about Conan’s visit to his office. Here’s why:
      1) Jordan spoke with a normal tone at the beginning, “ Feels like an acceptable reaction to me”. The “ to me “ part is a bit highly tuned, which implied a plea of guilty.
      2) Jordan seemed rather surprised when he realised there’s a camera crew in there.

  • @Rocketmanrun
    @Rocketmanrun 3 ปีที่แล้ว +305

    "Ive been experimenting with oats and whey." Quite possibly my favorite line ever

    • @Rocketmanrun
      @Rocketmanrun ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Same

    • @billbauer9795
      @billbauer9795 9 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Why? I don't get it.

    • @EricThomason
      @EricThomason 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      @@billbauer9795 Because it's delivered at such a funny time. Conan is trying to interrogate him about his tardiness and he responds with oddly specific details of his breakfast shake

  • @faderpie
    @faderpie 10 ปีที่แล้ว +390

    "Then, I prepared my body in various ways."
    LMFAO

    • @Fivehe
      @Fivehe 10 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Love your profile pic

    • @papajohn4118
      @papajohn4118 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      fdr shah

  • @jetjazz05
    @jetjazz05 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1638

    I don't know if Jordan is an actual person or a character... but he's great.

    • @Smurffitness
      @Smurffitness 5 ปีที่แล้ว +100

      mix

    • @kakokapolei123
      @kakokapolei123 5 ปีที่แล้ว +312

      I believe it's just an exaggerated version of himself

    • @kakokapolei123
      @kakokapolei123 5 ปีที่แล้ว +75

      mhm izme I think he said so in a Reddit AMA
      Edit: I'll copy an paste the question and his response here:
      "Is your on-air personality similar to your actual personality? If so, don't you realize how you come off, and that the reason we think you're hilarious is not because of your culinary / fasion / etc. bravado?"
      "Yes to both. -JS"

    • @alizivani6274
      @alizivani6274 5 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      @mhm izme Jesus Christ, why do you keep replying to each comment. These comments are all from months ago.

    • @rvk4b3
      @rvk4b3 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @mhm izme shhh

  • @pradyunmanoj6716
    @pradyunmanoj6716 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2153

    3:07
    the funny thing is, u expect him in the car, and then he comes in his scooter 😂🤣🛵

    • @klaus_lima
      @klaus_lima 4 ปีที่แล้ว +184

      As he thinks a stereotypical italian does.

    • @user-cn4se7ui6j
      @user-cn4se7ui6j 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      😂

    • @pradyunmanoj6716
      @pradyunmanoj6716 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@user-cn4se7ui6j lmao

    • @amoreazione3563
      @amoreazione3563 4 ปีที่แล้ว +95

      he's driving a Vespa which is the quintessential Italian scooter. And fun fact: many Italians, rich or poor, do drive to their workplace on vespas

    • @davidbustamante7278
      @davidbustamante7278 4 ปีที่แล้ว +40

      @@amoreazione3563 damn he’s obsessed with italians

  • @priyabuddhavarapu
    @priyabuddhavarapu ปีที่แล้ว +18

    It’s been ten years since I saw this video and the phrase “I prepared my body in various ways” still sends me into the stratosphere every time I hear it

  • @occipitalneuralgia2339
    @occipitalneuralgia2339 5 ปีที่แล้ว +468

    “”Why would you have two?” One to open, and one to never touch as investment collectible. Makes total sense!

    • @kylethenile
      @kylethenile 5 ปีที่แล้ว +24

      One to rock, one to stock

    • @Turnheadcough
      @Turnheadcough 5 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Riiiiight. One to play with the other to keep girls away

    • @SincerestSawa
      @SincerestSawa 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Any collector knows you get two

    • @danielr3522
      @danielr3522 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      I did *not* know that, Dianna, though in retrospect it makes perfect sense.

  • @aypeey8831
    @aypeey8831 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1366

    I've worked for a living...absolutely killed me how he destroyed him in 5 words 😂😂

    • @peaceduke1
      @peaceduke1 6 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I didn't get it. Could you please explain it to me?

    • @MrJovanify
      @MrJovanify 6 ปีที่แล้ว +73

      @@peaceduke1 Conan is stating that he used to work a 9 to 5 job in which he is pay by the hour and up to 40 hours a week. People would clock in using those time cards back in the day, then clock out when there shift is done. Those who are paid salary don't have the luxury of having a "fixed" time to work and generally work for more than 40 hours getting paid the same salary regardless how long they have worked for that week.
      In Jordan's case. He makes the joke because it is assume that Jordan never gotten paid hourly in his life, instead is paid a salary.
      edit: On top of that, salary pay is normally given to upper position like management.

    • @MrZackavelli
      @MrZackavelli 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      That's more like four words and a letter

    • @Ken.-
      @Ken.- 5 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      He still didn't use the punch clock correctly. You know how I knew....

    • @antpat
      @antpat 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Conan probably worked a real job for a few months now claims to have "worked for a living" so he doesn't alienate his viewers being a millionaire... Rich people are always downplaying their status to appease their working slob viewers.

  • @NishantGogna
    @NishantGogna 8 ปีที่แล้ว +903

    jordan is the unsung hero of the internet

  • @MannyManny91
    @MannyManny91 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +3773

    Who’s still watching this in 2024!?

  • @MegazoneMusic23
    @MegazoneMusic23 8 ปีที่แล้ว +138

    07:25 "My Lack of awareness of the time is not responsible for the hour that I arrive in the office " - J.S.
    Classic Schlansky-isms

  • @empire0
    @empire0 9 ปีที่แล้ว +793

    Conan's joke backfired a bit when Jordan took his shirt off and he's ripped.

    • @Dmdm_dm
      @Dmdm_dm 9 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      empire Conan's also very fit

    • @empire0
      @empire0 9 ปีที่แล้ว +109

      ***** People that don't have pictures of themselves flexing and taking pictures of themselves shirtless in a mirror as their profile pic.

    • @empire0
      @empire0 9 ปีที่แล้ว +69

      ***** Nah

    • @user-py6kt7id3t
      @user-py6kt7id3t 9 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      empire That's what you'll get when you mixed oats and whey.. lol

    • @MihaiViteazul100
      @MihaiViteazul100 9 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      ***** It's not bothersome per se, but it's pretty tacky.

  • @JulioCoudio
    @JulioCoudio 7 ปีที่แล้ว +5259

    Correct.
    This is not true.
    Why would I ?
    Undecided.
    This guy is a replicant.

    • @Verbal_Kent
      @Verbal_Kent 7 ปีที่แล้ว +145

      Julien Coudray he is so uncanny.. I know some one like this. I told him about jordan .. And he was like.. "Thats not funny...". With the most unemotional expression
      I was like... "Spot on!" 😎🤣🤣🤣🤣

    • @matthewm.6405
      @matthewm.6405 7 ปีที่แล้ว +55

      They make him do a baseline test every week

    • @Zip-id7pm
      @Zip-id7pm 6 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      Matthew M. Interlinked!

    • @yassinelamin5243
      @yassinelamin5243 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Juli

    • @nthnlzhang
      @nthnlzhang 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      He said "I've decided"

  • @alexkozlovsky8233
    @alexkozlovsky8233 ปีที่แล้ว +40

    I re-watch this clip once every few months and it never fails to make me happy.

  • @AceBobcat
    @AceBobcat 8 ปีที่แล้ว +2614

    Jordon's probably the real life version of Dexter Morgan.

    • @hmfoden
      @hmfoden 8 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      EXACTLY who he reminds me of!!

    • @jsnthurst1
      @jsnthurst1 8 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      He's just a Vulcan!

    • @jackroberts4521
      @jackroberts4521 8 ปีที่แล้ว

      THANK YOU!

    • @michaelsemen5529
      @michaelsemen5529 7 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      He's just Hachiman in real life from OREGAIRU

    • @albert0495
      @albert0495 7 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Or the real version of Gilfoyle on Silicon Valley

  • @mattschumacher4581
    @mattschumacher4581 8 ปีที่แล้ว +287

    HAHAHAHAHA I just looked at the Jordan's Wikipedia page and it says that he performs "various tasks" for Conan😂

  • @FrankieBeanss
    @FrankieBeanss 9 ปีที่แล้ว +1766

    anyone notice that the coffee maker is now in his room lol

    • @sya286
      @sya286 9 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Yasss hahaha

    • @shellsy515
      @shellsy515 9 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      It looked like it was in the hall.

    • @BabyBillo
      @BabyBillo 9 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      +FrankieBeans it's still in the hall. you can see it as jordan walks in. that is another one

    • @joewouldknow
      @joewouldknow 9 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      +BabyBillo Excellent catch there, I didn't notice. I think it's hilarious that he bought another one!

    • @ConjahConj
      @ConjahConj 8 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      +FrankieBeans thats a printer you idiots, do you know what a printer is?

  • @fletcherreed3259
    @fletcherreed3259 3 ปีที่แล้ว +76

    I think Jordan legitimately has anxiety issues around Conan LOL the look of relief on his face when Conan finally walks away is priceless

  • @freddiesharpe6297
    @freddiesharpe6297 8 ปีที่แล้ว +281

    every month or so i go on a Jordan Schlansky binge

  • @AxeMurderer24
    @AxeMurderer24 7 ปีที่แล้ว +9056

    Looks like Jordan's experimentation with oats and whey is paying off. Dudes looking swole

    • @DisassociationStabalized
      @DisassociationStabalized 6 ปีที่แล้ว +875

      Jordan actually maintains an impressive physique. I'm surprised he doesn't get swarmed by ladies.
      Oh right, he acts like a Gen I Android.

    • @kaitlynnp.6752
      @kaitlynnp.6752 6 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      Thunderchole hehehehhehe

    • @JotaShank
      @JotaShank 6 ปีที่แล้ว +165

      He reminds me of Patrick Bateman... a less violent and less shallow version of him.

    • @samyargo9752
      @samyargo9752 6 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      Thunderchole have you watched "American Psycho"?

    • @samyargo9752
      @samyargo9752 6 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Jota.Shank "less"?

  • @tylerg7921
    @tylerg7921 5 ปีที่แล้ว +415

    "If anyone wants to get Jordan a wedding present, I believe he's registered at Toys R Us."

    • @tijuanamustchange
      @tijuanamustchange 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      hey, don't diss Toys R Us.... our favorite wedding present was "Risk", to this day I don't know if it was given with good intentions or trying to make a fight.

  • @fasteddylove-muffin6415
    @fasteddylove-muffin6415 3 ปีที่แล้ว +166

    "You've studied humans on our planet for awhile." Hilarious. Probably true too.

  • @shannonbriggs100
    @shannonbriggs100 9 ปีที่แล้ว +587

    Jordan may seem boring to a lot of people but I could easily imagine him being a very interesting person to talk to. He holds a lot of facts and information. He also seems very well educated, polite and friendly.

    • @007NowOnline
      @007NowOnline 9 ปีที่แล้ว +54

      Shannon Briggs Topics would revolve around bears, beets and battlestar galactica.

    • @erwingray7118
      @erwingray7118 9 ปีที่แล้ว

      Teal'c I he finds a girl with similar interests, it'd be heaven on earth for him, I imagine

    • @007NowOnline
      @007NowOnline 9 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Erwin Grey True. .. though, I think I heard he got married.

    • @erwingray7118
      @erwingray7118 9 ปีที่แล้ว

      Teal'c Actually she's prolly lucky, cause he's not half bad looking

    • @druii2
      @druii2 9 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Teal'c I believe that's Dwight Schrute

  • @phothewin6019
    @phothewin6019 8 ปีที่แล้ว +1762

    I'm supposed to be studying for a midterm right now but I can't stop watching Conan vids lol.

    • @신예원-w2n
      @신예원-w2n 8 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Duwang Is Unbreakable me too I can't stop watching these videos

    • @motherspiders3913
      @motherspiders3913 8 ปีที่แล้ว

      me too

    • @user-wq6uz9sd6e
      @user-wq6uz9sd6e 8 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Duwang Is Unbreakable me aF

    • @kubraozyrt
      @kubraozyrt 8 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Duwang Is Unbreakable same but finals

    • @terabithia2904
      @terabithia2904 8 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      finals tomorrow and I can't stop watching :(

  • @kentfink9509
    @kentfink9509 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3736

    This guy is extremely angry, and I'm envious of his self control.

    • @whoopsie890
      @whoopsie890 5 ปีที่แล้ว +601

      He's in on the joke. He's playing an exaggerated version of himself.

    • @hepty3179
      @hepty3179 5 ปีที่แล้ว +60

      Simon Knight right his also playing an extremely angry guy with great self control

    • @RabbitConfirmed
      @RabbitConfirmed 5 ปีที่แล้ว +34

      @@firstLast-jw7bm That or, he is a psychopath. Heh

    • @tijuanamustchange
      @tijuanamustchange 5 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      @@RabbitConfirmed "There has been no catharsis, I HAVE LEARNED NOTHING"

    • @casono
      @casono 5 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      When Conan said to punch in i was hoping Jordan would be like "Can I punch you?"

  • @duckbert3314
    @duckbert3314 2 ปีที่แล้ว +23

    "I prepare my body in various ways" he says that so creepily yet funnily at the same time. Pure gold.

  • @hasanrahman5128
    @hasanrahman5128 8 ปีที่แล้ว +800

    i was just binge watching conan's videos and realised that it can be made into tv sitcom and it would be a hit

  • @shyamram92
    @shyamram92 8 ปีที่แล้ว +252

    "you know how I know its supposed to be in the center? Because i've worked for a living" Conan with the cleverest roast

  • @rkline65
    @rkline65 3 ปีที่แล้ว +269

    Of all the Jordan skits, THIS one never gets old.....

    • @theaveragemegaguy
      @theaveragemegaguy 3 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Seriously this was the first one I saw and every time I watch it I die of laughter

    • @pablot-r9402
      @pablot-r9402 9 หลายเดือนก่อน

      It's certainly one of the most sincere, and is a great introductory video to those we are trying to introduce to the Conan + Jordan saga! The only thing more we could ever wish for is for these two to have met each other sooner! So much situational / conversational comedy gold! 💛

  • @musiqa-workshops
    @musiqa-workshops ปีที่แล้ว +62

    Knowing that this is not scripted you have to appreciate how well Jordan depleted Conans attacks in the first 3 minutes. He actually went boss mode all the way, from throwing his jacket into the trash pile to preparing his body in various ways and keeping his shades on after arriving at work at 1 PM, then making Conan thirsty by taking his shirt of while calmly disclaiming "I only shaved my face". Jordan is the man.

    • @bajskuk
      @bajskuk ปีที่แล้ว +1

      It's semi scripted.

    • @CapoElChivo
      @CapoElChivo 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      ⁠@@bajskukin a reddit AMA Schlansky confirmed the Espresso remote and some others werent scripted, I’d bet a lot of the milder office prank skits like this are unscripted.

    • @NinuRenee
      @NinuRenee 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      I dont know how Jordan is in real life, but the way he portrays himself in Conan's show to me just looks and sounds like someone who hasnt come out or even to terms with their asperger/alexithymia. I never realized his traits being ASD back then but now in hindsight it's painfully obvious.

  • @LeoCharles
    @LeoCharles 8 ปีที่แล้ว +283

    "I prepare my body in various ways" im using that sentece before going out for now on lol

  • @liesoul
    @liesoul 8 ปีที่แล้ว +387

    jordan almost cracked at the body shaving part

    • @louieis1337
      @louieis1337 8 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Lmao true

    • @FishoD
      @FishoD 8 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      exactly, no matter how many times Conan says he is real it is clear he plays a character...

    • @Janette388
      @Janette388 8 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      +Fisho D yea if Jordan isnt real .well what a great actor!! cause i would be laughing throught the whole video😂

    • @MannyJohnson1984
      @MannyJohnson1984 8 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      +Fisho D Aaron debunked this in StreamCoco. Jordan is a real lol

    • @xgalarion8659
      @xgalarion8659 7 ปีที่แล้ว

      timmy timson consider that conan said wikibear is totally real, and a lot of other things. I think schlansky is real though, there are weird people.

  • @johnnyfelcher8156
    @johnnyfelcher8156 8 ปีที่แล้ว +855

    Conan laughing at his own jokes seems to make the jokes even funnier.

  • @mikeyslots_
    @mikeyslots_ 3 ปีที่แล้ว +86

    At 6:43 Conan avoided a huge issue by not saying anything about Jordan being married, you can see him pause for a little as if he thought about it. Sign of a smart comedian

    • @ozaki66
      @ozaki66 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Why would it be a huge issue?

  • @plasmichoneytrip
    @plasmichoneytrip 8 ปีที่แล้ว +419

    He's the associate producer...Even if this was not scripted, he knows what's good for a show.

    • @adelachaudh2416
      @adelachaudh2416 8 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      But still.. I measn even if I knew this was staged it would've been a great sketch. They are so funny together!

    • @Dem0nized
      @Dem0nized 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      Ricca Shaps funny thing is scripted or not anyone will believe what he says.

  • @mei5102
    @mei5102 7 ปีที่แล้ว +642

    I thought it was Jordan in the black car, but then I saw the red scooter 😂😂😂😂😂

  • @MiyukiDragon
    @MiyukiDragon 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5952

    "Then i prepared my body in various ways."
    - Jordan Schlansky 2k13

    • @amandab3946
      @amandab3946 5 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      Hades Of The underworlds
      2k13

    • @MiyukiDragon
      @MiyukiDragon 5 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      @@amandab3946 2K19 For viewers in 2k19. I know its 2k13

    • @jackjohnson8305
      @jackjohnson8305 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@MiyukiDragon Doesn't matter when we watched it it still is 2k13.

    • @amandab3946
      @amandab3946 5 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Hades Of The underworlds
      Lol
      “a house divided cannot stand” - Abraham Lincoln- 2k19

    • @RabbitConfirmed
      @RabbitConfirmed 5 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      He is the real American Psycho

  • @scytheria7
    @scytheria7 3 ปีที่แล้ว +72

    Jordan could honestly be The Office James Bond if that makes sense lmao… the physique, clear familiarity with being interrogated, articulation and vaguely European vibe… 10/10

  • @rk1695
    @rk1695 7 ปีที่แล้ว +321

    "You have studied humans on our planet for a while"

  • @albboy96
    @albboy96 10 ปีที่แล้ว +647

    its probably the 10th time ive watched this and its still funny as hell

    • @DooMylicious
      @DooMylicious 9 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      same here, I always find myself returning to these videos

    • @TstormVA2012
      @TstormVA2012 9 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      This is my first..and I'm dying. Just dying!!!

    • @seattlegirl33
      @seattlegirl33 9 ปีที่แล้ว +23

      Anytime I'm in a shitty mood I watch this....never gets old!

    • @chembiz
      @chembiz 9 ปีที่แล้ว +58

      I watch this whenever I'm avoiding cleaning and/or studying.

    • @sergiotaki9
      @sergiotaki9 9 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      albboy96 right there with you!

  • @ESE33
    @ESE33 4 ปีที่แล้ว +502

    I love how Conan keeps stressing "he's a real human being" because otherwise we would forget

  • @br0d1zzle_11
    @br0d1zzle_11 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Conan and Jordan is my internal dialogue everyday. I love this video. I could watch a thousand episodes of these two interacting

  • @panzerwolf494
    @panzerwolf494 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1893

    "In case he ever makes a friend" (conan laughs)
    "In case he ever gets married" (conan laughs)
    I couldn't help but laugh hysterically

    • @reyzephlyn105
      @reyzephlyn105 5 ปีที่แล้ว +30

      The two cups are for the Death Squad Commander lol

    • @reganwolf4405
      @reganwolf4405 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      😆👌🏼

  • @karimaltairi7580
    @karimaltairi7580 6 ปีที่แล้ว +893

    i like how when Jordan took his shirt off Conan wouldn't stop staring

    • @SeeburgMusic
      @SeeburgMusic 6 ปีที่แล้ว +66

      Who COULD stop staring?

    • @aquarius4884
      @aquarius4884 6 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      6:19 Conan looks away tho.

    • @lostalien9538
      @lostalien9538 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      everybody wants Joardas D

    • @citobop256
      @citobop256 6 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Jordan could have this. Daaaaaaamn. He is hot

    • @stranraerwal
      @stranraerwal 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@lostalien9538 : not me !

  • @allys744
    @allys744 4 ปีที่แล้ว +228

    “Anyone wants to get Jordan a wedding present, he’s registered at toys R us.”

  • @matthewadair4507
    @matthewadair4507 ปีที่แล้ว +25

    This’ll be 10 years old next month. Time flies when on a Conan/Jordan Schanlsky binge fest.

  • @nateschwartz8808
    @nateschwartz8808 9 ปีที่แล้ว +396

    I bet Jordan Schlansky watched the same, "How To Be Normal: For Beginners" video that Spongebob watched.

    • @xstrawarot
      @xstrawarot 9 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      haha xD

    • @davej479
      @davej479 9 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      ***** Hi how are ya :)

    • @nendrob155
      @nendrob155 9 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      David Romero Wonderful weather we're having.

    • @Benfamir
      @Benfamir 9 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Lmfao

    • @leesway
      @leesway 9 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      lmao! hi. how are you? pleasant weather we're having.

  • @rosssharma542
    @rosssharma542 8 ปีที่แล้ว +1003

    This video contains one my favorite interactions being two human beings:
    Conan: I just asked if you shaved your John Dory. Do you?
    Jordan: I believe that's a private matter.
    Conan: You draw the line there?
    Jordan: In terms of talking about my daily grooming rituals?
    Conan: Yes.
    Jordan: Yes.
    Conan: Okay. You can put your shirt back on.

    • @David-sp9vd
      @David-sp9vd 8 ปีที่แล้ว +55

      No keep the shirt off and leave the glasses on.

    • @CrniWuk
      @CrniWuk 8 ปีที่แล้ว +106

      The fact that this was not scripted, makes it absolutely perfect. So much magic going on between those two guys.

    • @joet8862
      @joet8862 8 ปีที่แล้ว +137

      Conan's an improv master, and Jordan's quick-witted

    • @existencedefieslogic9658
      @existencedefieslogic9658 7 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Gilles M. One human and one Vulcan*

  • @OLBastholm
    @OLBastholm 8 ปีที่แล้ว +1614

    I simply don't believe this wasn't scripted. It's way too good to be real.

    • @alexandrakalandarishvili4901
      @alexandrakalandarishvili4901 8 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      i think so too

    • @victorle3652
      @victorle3652 8 ปีที่แล้ว +257

      The Jordan Schlansky in these videos are the exaggerated version of himself.

    • @JadeJackal4
      @JadeJackal4 8 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Victor Le You know him?

    • @spaceenablers4753
      @spaceenablers4753 8 ปีที่แล้ว +89

      The best things aren't lol

    • @scofield1154
      @scofield1154 7 ปีที่แล้ว +26

      conan made a meme out of him , probably when he saw him behaving weird like this.

  • @midwestpuertorican6637
    @midwestpuertorican6637 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    Ten years later and I’m still watching this. Huge Conan fan.!

  • @nemesis1ization
    @nemesis1ization 11 ปีที่แล้ว +69

    "my lack of awareness of the time is not responsible for the hour that i arrive in the office" because the real reason is Jordan setting out early on Friday mornings to find swamps and wastelands to dump the corpses of his victims.

  • @DestituteBaron
    @DestituteBaron 9 ปีที่แล้ว +813

    "Do you know how I know it's the center?"
    "How?"
    "Because I work for a living."
    I'M DONE

    • @fearlesprobe
      @fearlesprobe 9 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      ***** ^This

    • @minartson
      @minartson 9 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      ***** Everyone got that buddy :D

    • @securuslol
      @securuslol 9 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      ***** The fact that this other guy didn't get the past tense, the difference between "I work" and "I've Worked" , means that not everybody got it.

    • @minartson
      @minartson 9 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      ***** Maybe he just remembered it wrong. He still got the main idea.

    • @bigmike-
      @bigmike- 9 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Digger Gaming en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_burn_centers_in_the_United_States

  • @Romeis
    @Romeis 6 ปีที่แล้ว +1563

    "I'm experimenting with oats and whey"
    WHO SAYS THAT

    • @Alejandro_87
      @Alejandro_87 6 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      BAWderDOn people that like the smell of their own farts

    • @kirop7
      @kirop7 6 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      I do. Is it weird?

    • @morningstar577
      @morningstar577 6 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      600xOverkill is that a South Park reference? Lol

    • @Alejandro_87
      @Alejandro_87 6 ปีที่แล้ว

      morning star ;)

    • @idkmybffjv
      @idkmybffjv 6 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Little Miss Muffet?

  • @marksparroweducation
    @marksparroweducation 2 ปีที่แล้ว +88

    I don't know why but whenever the exam period starts, I somehow end up on a Schlansky marathon

    • @Alex_1729
      @Alex_1729 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      You're procrastinating. Watching Schlansky videos is what you do when dealing with stress. You've made a habit out of it. Cue, Craving, Response, Reward. Stress appears, wanting relief, watching videos, feeling good. If you want to pass the exams, you need to break the cycle. If you need more psychological analysis just reply with something 😂

    • @HeroicHaroon
      @HeroicHaroon ปีที่แล้ว

      @@Alex_1729 goddamn bruh, tell us more