Instead of 'sparks joy', as a hoarder, instead ask yourself if you love how it makes you look, right now, today. Try it on if you arent sure. Another good question that worked for my dad was, would you buy it today?
I started my decluttering journey (I can't believe I just used the J word lol) early 2018 and I had clothes that I never wore, not because I didn't like them or because they didn't fit me, but because I thought they looked stupid ON ME. So I kept passing over them every morning because there was no way I could go outside in them. There was nothing wrong with the clothes, it was entirely about me and how I feel about myself, but the fact remained that I wasn't ever going to wear them, so they had to go. If I wouldn't put it on right now and walk out of the house in it, it has to go. It was so hard, and i'm not even in to fashion.
"because the majority of these clothes spark joy" YES!! That is what it's like to be a hoarder!! Although as I go along, I start to discover that as a borderline hoarder, I have trouble discerning between, "it sparks emotion" and "it sparks joy." My wires get crossed, and I think that "emotional" means "joyful." I'm getting better at it now!
I resonate SO much with you. I am also a hoarder, and was getting anxiety just from watching you go through your clothes, knowing that I have to do the same. I felt your nervous laugh through and through...you didn't even have to explain that it was your way of holding back tears. I immediately knew how you felt. You putting this on the internet is so brave, but more so it helps your fellow hoarders so much, knowing that we are not alone in our way of thinking. THANK YOU!!!
@angelamele67 me too and chronic neck, back and hip pain from arthritis!!! makes it so difficult to do everyday tasks, much less take on getting rid of my hoard!!! going to counseling this week for the first time as I am ready to get my house back! I just can't live like this anymore!!! I just can't!!! hope you are doing better 3 yrs. down the road...
Talking through the emotions is very powerful. Your doing an awesome job. You’re not the only one winning at the end. Your marriage, children, and family all win as well.
One thing I've done for sentimental clothing/ items is to time capsule it into a bin. I have one high school bin and one college bin. It lets me feel like I can tangibly keep who I was while not taking up tons of space. It has really helped me emotionaly while I let go of things. 💖
Start by getting rid of everything that doesnt fit. Then everything you have not worn in a year. Then go from there. Be ruthless. You can do this. Keep an eye on the prize... what is your goal for your home? Write it down and focus on that.
I wish you would try it on before throwing it out just because you haven’t worn it in a year. Maybe you didnt wear it because the other incidentals we’re blocking its energy
I don’t agree with getting rid of things that don’t fit as my weight goes up and down quite regularly plus I have a few items from being young and with a tiny waist as memories.I also have a case of vintage clothes that I’ve collected .
The thing with Konmari is it takes months. Even on the show she’s with them over months. So if it’s hard it’s okay, it’s supposed to be hard to change habits;) you’re doing great!
@@ahoardersheart sometimes the fear and anxiety of letting things go gets big. So chose the joyful items first. Feel gratitude for all the beautiful memories you will remember doing this xx
Im glad you said this. I thought i was being slow because its taken several weeks going through different parts of 2 bedrooms. Ive gotten rid of about 3 boxes of shoes and atleast 10 boxes of clothes. Over the past day or two ive gotten together 3 boxes of books that are being donated. It's an ongoing process.
Dear @A Hoarder's Heart -- You are about the most honest person I've come across regarding this trend of decluttering for us hoarders. Thank you for articulating so many things I can relate to but I could not put into words. You are definitely not alone. Thank you for putting a voice to what many of us experience. I feel many of the comments here are made by folks who are not able to understand your/our situation. I, too, put a lot of attachment onto things. I, too, keep nearly everything -- clothes, craft items, paper, cards, bits that could come in handy someday.... I have a poor memory and physical items (not pictures) help me remember. The idea of photographing everything and writing about it overwhelms me even more than keeping items, so that strategy won't work for me. So what am I to do? I've been giving my hoarding a lot of thought lately -- I am in the process of moving *and* I have a moth problem -- or maybe it is not really a problem because I have to touch and clean everything and throw some items away. And the thought came to me during this process -- Do I really need to hold on to the *memories* and the past?? This is a revolutionary turn of thinking for me. Will I really lose the memory of a past event if I toss a physical reminder? And if I do forget something because I toss the physical item, is that alright? Can I live with it? What am I afraid of losing? And why am I so attached to the *memories* my stuff evokes? While I ask myself these questions, I have no answers. Perhaps challenging my need for memories and loss gets me into an uncomfortable place and perhaps that is a better place than ignoring my problem. I just subscribed to your channel and I support whatever you do, however you do it, in whatever time it takes you. I hope you never feel that you must declutter just because "your audience" expects you to. Thank you for sharing your journey, wherever it takes you. Blessings and strength. --nina.
I just want to say that your message has filled my heart with so much happiness ♥️ This is the exact intention of my channel. To be completely honest with my hoarding, let non-hoarders understand how my hoarder mind is “wired” and to let other hoarders know that they are not alone. I have full faith that we can heal from our hoarding. I am learning to detach myself from my items as well. I’m learning that I am my smile and my laugh! I am not a sweater or a necklace. I keep repeating this to myself. And I feel the same way as you...pictures don’t really help. I wonder if it’s a sensory issue bc I need to see or touch it to feel that comfort of holding onto it. I’m so glad you found me! I feel like we can learn a lot from each other ♥️
@@@ahoardersheart -- First off, you are so courageous for undertaking this journey publicly. I am glad you wear glasses and do what makes you feel comfortable. It is enough to hear your thoughts and watch your progress. Who really needs to know your exact identity anyway? Second, you are kind-hearted -- the fact that you may feel one way, but respond to a commenter's suggestion in a positive way, never dismissing, is beautiful. For example, many have suggested you take pictures of your items before you toss them (as well-meaning friends have said to me), and you graciously thank each person for their idea. Somewhere along the way, IMHO, the KonMari "method" of decluttering has gotten co-opted to mean "minimalism" and I believe that is not the intent, tho I profess, I have not read Marie Kondo's books. Instead my journey with stuff is teaching me about being a caretaker -- Maybe I want 500 books, but I must love them enough to take care of them. Same with my clothes. Maybe it is ok that I have t-shirts from college and coffee mugs from vacations I took decades ago, and that is ok *as long as I take care of them*. We each have to define what it means to take care of our things. For me, I have a lot of stuff in boxes hidden behind other boxes so I don't see it. Because I am simultaneously preparing to move *and* battling pantry and clothing moths (go ahead, be horrified -- sometimes I am too -- but mostly I am ok with them because they allow me to purge), I have to open every box and ask myself not whether something sparks joy (bc everything does-- I love my stuff), but I have to ask if I am willing to take care of the item going forward. My stuff deserves better care than I've given -- too many woolens are now moth eaten because I didn't take good care of them. Food is spoiled because I didn't take care of it. I am realizing that I have only so much energy to take care of my possessions, so my current approach is asking what do I have the energy to keep. And as I said before, what memories am I willing to let go when I get rid of clothing or paper or gifts or coffee mugs. Thanks. It feels like I'm taking a break from my sorting and packing to have a quick cup of coffee with you, a new friend who understands the heartbreak, the heartache, the ridicule, the difficulty, the emotions, and so much more; but also a friend who Does Not Judge Me. Now I feel that when I get discouraged, I can come to your channel and watch and listen to you and feel a community That You Created. You rock, you know that? All the best to you as you share your journey.
@@nsavar5864 thank you so much for writing this...it is so hard, so isolating and so shaming to live like this and it really helps to find those who resonate...I have thought about this lately too, of the fact that the things I keep are things that need to be taken care of, that need time, and space and energy, and attention....
I love this train of thought on memories. this is a real process of letting go, of much more than tangible visible concrete items... thank you so much Nina for sharing this...this is such a debilitating mental space, at least for me, this hoarding is like living in a frozen hell...everything gets stuck and just blocks...
Many of the items I try to part with bring happy memories.. before my son died.. before I was depressed, before my mom died… but many of the things I try to part with also make me sad. It feels paralyzing.. but I also have wondered what life would be like without all of this stuff & the memories. I honestly think I would be happier. I remember what life was like when I didn’t have stuff. When I was 23 I literally owned one cardboard box of stuff, and a backpack of clothes. When I moved into the first house I bought I didn’t have furniture to fill the rooms. The closets were bare. The basement was empty. 40 years later every single closet is full, every bed has full storage bins under it, the basement is chuck full. I built a shed specifically to move bins of hoarded memorabilia into it to make room in the house. My house is clean, and the living areas are “happy”.. but everything is TOO full. It’s not all mine though, I am NOT a shopper… somehow it has all accumulated… a lot of it is the contents of my mom’s house that I emptied after she died (she was an organized hoarder and kept every interesting thing that our now deceased elders had collected- they were artists, writers, gardeners, photographers, etc). A lot of it is my daughter’s- every time she moved or downsized from college on up for 10-12 years. She travels the world and collects vintage clothes & curiosities. It is OVERWHELMING. Prior to when my mom died, I had spent YEARS sorting, & purging and “organizing” and had FINALLY gotten it down to one room in the basement that was full of bins. I was ready to airbnb my home and travel. Then my mom needed my help for a while, and then she died, & seemingly overnight my house was full again. I am exhausted and depressed because of it, and where at other times in my life I had the energy, motivation and focus to optimistically work on it.. I no longer do. I have barely done anything about it since bringing all the stuff from my mom’s house in 2021. I am wondering if I just had some major yard sales, and donated the rest of it how unhappy would I be? I feel like I would feel free. I feel like I would stop being depressed. Like I could start over in life. Like I would no longer feel paralyzed. I came here today (first time seeing this channel) hoping to find inspiration.. I did a google search for “Hoarder to minimalist in 30 days” 😂 I will keep looking. I think I REALLY need to figure out the overnight method. I can’t go on living this way; I am so, so unhappy. And it’s definitely because of the overwhelming burden of having so much stuff and feeling like there is no hope.
What helps me to let things go is to ask myself, “do I want to take this item forward to the next phase of my life?”. If you want to move forward with reducing your stuff, decide what you don’t want to take forward in your life, thank the item for the joy it gave you and let it go. Just like some toys, some clothes are meant for a reason or a season, not as part of a permanent collection. Good luck my beauty!
ArtJourneyUK what a wonderful idea...thank you so much for that insight!! If I want my next phase of life to have less clutter & less hoarder attachments...then the answer is quite clear. Thank you for showing me a new perspective ♥️
I helped my friend who was a hoarder, she had more clothes than you. She sounded exactly like you. I had to sit with her and handed her one article of clothing at a time. We made huge progress! But then she never got around to the next step of the Kon Marie method. So she still has a home full of things but at least it’s not over flowing with clothes. At least your brave enough to put your experience on TH-cam to share
Awe, thank you so so much 💜🦄💜 That’s why I’m sharing my heart as a hoarder...so ppl can understand they are not alone and that they can do it too! You friend was strong enough to do her clothes...she is also strong enough to do the other categories too 💜💜 It’s baby steps with hoarders...one day at a time!
I loved hearing you encourage the clothes to go forth and bring others joy. I don't use the KonMari method but a lot of my clients find success in doing two passes (on whatever category of items we are going through.)💛
The more you do this, the easier it will become. I think you did a great job and I loved that you talked things out with your clothes. It's really nice to see you be honest about what you are experiencing. It helps others to know that they are not alone and that they can change, too.
First of all, I LOVE how colorful and how much character your wardrobe has. It seems like you really show yourself and your personality through what you wear, so perhaps starting with your wardrobe would have been a more difficult place to start. But look at how well you did!!! You still were able to let go of a number of pieces and that’s what matters. The decluttering doesn’t have to happen in one go, it can take 2, 7, 20 times. What matters is that you remind yourself of the goals you set and what you want from your life, and you just keep taking the baby steps to get there. I’m proud of you! And I think you did an amazing job. Just take it one day at a time :)
Katie Pags oh thank you so much for sweet uplifting message ♥️♥️ It really means the world to me!!! And you are right, perhaps my clothes were too high on the emotion side to tackle all at once!! I am willing to try any cleaning/decluttering Challenge to see what works best with my hoarding mindset!! But baby steps is still will move me forward ♥️
I totally agree. You did great!! That bin you filled with winter stuff that you haven’t worn but just couldn’t part with? It’s out of your closet... so that is an excellent declutter right there. It will wait patiently in your basement until one day you will pull it out and be ready to say... These clothes hold lovely old memories, but I have so many great newer fresher memories so NOW I can let you go calmly, with joy. I am in the process of decluttering too. I downsized hard (and fast) after a divorce going into a much smaller place than I used to live. It’s been 3 years. It took me a year to open some of the boxes, poke through them and get rid of some of it... last year it was a bit easier. I am ready to dig into them again and let go of more. Maybe a lot more? Eventually I will get through all of it. Baby steps.
A Hoarder's Heart Don’t think the video is too long when you are showing your decision making process as that is what people like me(a slowly recovering hoarder)enjoy the most.There are are plenty of vlogs where people talk about things at the beginning of the process and lots of organising ones but not enough on why you keep/let go of things.For those of us that love our clothes we totally relate to you😁
11:14 "The problem is that I humanize things" wow, that spoke to me. My mom and I both hold onto things that we don't really need and I think this is why. What a wonderful way to look at this and brings a lot of insight. I'm sending this video to her, maybe we can start to purge together!
I can't explain how much I appreciate how raw and relatable and REAL you are in documenting decluttering! I've been watching youtube "closet cleanout" videos for probably 2 years now and all are either glamourized by skipping over the real piles/overwhelm or overdramatize "decluttering closet" as clickbait. Just had my ripe old age of 26 birthday last weekend and struggling with chronic physical illness + having both my sisters move out, (knowing im next), am panicked it's time for my process to progress with this. I didnt think my attachment to clothes for memories was shared with the same nuances and mindset as anyone bc i too struggle with anxiety/adhd/forgetting/sensory issues is so specific and scarce of finding anyone to really be understanding. I'm inspired to get going and might even try filming it too and not be ashamed of having attachments (all it means is my heart and head get too heavy in expressing emotion physically!) ♡ Much love & thanks to you 💕💫🌸
I saw your interview with Dawn from the Minimal mum and I decided to check out your channel. You are great and so funny..and so brave!!! ❤ I was laughting and crying at the same time, because it was as wathing myself. I was always saying that "spark joy"Konmari method is not very useful for us hoarders, because every peace of my clothes and other items sparks joy in me. And it always feels like parting forever with a good friend or a dear pet. I am struggling to declutter and have already parted with more than 130 kg of clothes and it is not even 1/3 of the clothes that I own. It is so hard but we can do it! Thank you so much for your honesty and help! Sending hoarders love from Europe, Croatia!
I feel like a lot of people search for MarieKondo videos to just watch people chuck things out with barely any effort as motivation for how easy it could be. But as a very sentimental person too I struggled with it! It was nice to see someone else experiencing the frustration 😂
John Smith lol, right!!! People would toss stuff and I’d already had 5 uses for it 😅 I will admit this was very hard for me but not impossible! We can do this...one sentimental piece at a time ♥️😅
Oh boy im decluttering my bedroom I think it might be the hardest place to start doing I did the bathroom first its the smallest place in my house kinda the easiest but my bedroom help me jesus clothes shoes I have a desk in there and guess whose in love with stationary yup this guy
I like watching M.K. but I don’t agree with her order.I don’t care about kitchen stuff etc.I am most sentimental about my clothes and books yet she says they are the easiest to get rid of.
Also I love that you're donating so much of it. Thrift stores and hand-me-downs are often the only ways I've clothed my kids sometimes. I'd say about 70% ish....of my own clothes are hand-me-downs. So go you for donating stuff!
Elizabeth Garrison awe, thank you so much!!! When I was a stay at home mom I used to always buy second hand & hand me downs. Now that I’m working, I’m buying new but I think it’s best for my purse & the environment to go back to that ♥️♥️♥️
So true. I donated all my stuff to a women's shelter. The only stuff that went into the trash was stuff that was worn out also socks and undies went into garbage too.
I haven’t tried the KonMari method, but I have watched a few of these videos and it appears to me that in order for this method to be effective we need to stop (but’s and if’s) because it seems like the goal is to de clutter the physical and emotional baggage that we carry. I am not ready to KonMari my house. When I do, I will be sure to truly let go of all the material things taking up space and time. I hope we can all find the joy and peace we seek. Thank you for sharing your journey.
Take pictures of all the clothes and other things that bring great memories and put them in a photo album that way you can always see it and remember it without it clut te ring your life
As someone who deals with anxiety and depression and some hoarder tendencies myself, I am in awe of your courage...love and prayers to and for you. 🤗🙏🏻💕
Thank you for sharing so much of yourself. I appreciate that you talk through your feelings and thoughts. Makes me understand myself a whole lot more. Thank you so much for sharing!
I feel this in my soul. This is why I have so many pieces of clothing, for my kids as well because I wanted to make them quilts using some of their favorite pieces but it isn't about them being their favorite pieces so much as me remembering them as babies and throughout the years. Thank you for this video! My goal this year is to get through the clothing clutter and let it go to bless other people in need. I don't need these items, nor am I actually using any of them. They are just creating more stress in my life.
Incredible...I love you!! I am just like you , I have memories in all my stuff. My house is a memory box. Full of thing that "spark joy" . It's so hard.. well done you. And thank you for sharing. I e been looking for someone like you for years. Its not helpful watching an organiser doing it as they don't have the emotional attachment. Thank you xx
Another good thing to remember is that you aren't "sending something away" there is no true "away"when you donate something you are allowing someone else to love it also. You can do it!
This video helped me realize the importance of bringing out everything of that category so when you realize your keeping too much you can look back at the massive pile and realize you need to do more lol
That is progress, I’m so bad I can’t even get rid of the grocery bags! It’s an addiction. Just last night my husband probably threw out a hundred grocery bags. I actually had to leave the room so I wouldn’t take them back.
I am a clothing hoarder and my hoard is about twenty times your hoard, EASY. My entire wardrobe would probably fill your whole living room. I watch so many videos, but every person that claims to be a clothing hoarder doesn’t even come close to my huge collection, and I’m starting to lose hope that there’s anyone out there like me that has conquered their mountain of clothes!!!
Girl, I feel ya! I came from a family of 7 siblings and we were very poor. My mom never got rid of clothes because all of our clothes were passed down/around. Now, I have a problem buying clothing or whatever and getting rid of stuff. Like out with the old in the with the new, it's just in in In. Lol. At least you are starting your journey and you gotta start somwhere!! Don't look at the thumbs down as a negative- I heard a TH-camr say it doesn't effect your page in a bad way- it has people interacting, so it's more a positive than a negative.
SOOOOO glad I finally found a moment to watch this video. You've done an amazing job! Thank you so much for making it, I think a lot of people will find value in your journey. Thank you also for sharing it on my channel! ❤️
A Small Wardrobe thank you so so much for watching it!! That really means to the world to me ♥️♥️ I’m trying to “rewrite” this hoarder mind of mine & your videos really inspire me to keep moving forward with my journey!!
First of all don't be embarrassed- you have great taste in clothes!! I kept saying oh that's cute lol! Plus i love watching konmari closet videos and ive seen way worse 😉 .....i'm so dang proud of you!!!!! I could watch this all day lol. I think it's incredible that you've made this decision in your heart to get things organized etc and that you are truly doing something about it and that you are sharing tvhe journey with us!! Please don't be embarrassed or ashamed!!
I love your sense of humor as you go through these videos. It’s actually amazing how positive you keep yourself even when doing something that can be so difficult. It’s really inspiring, and I hope to mimic your positive attitude in my own life.
I just found your videos and I am watching them all! My mom is a hoarder ( dirty dishes/ unwashed floor, goat trails) and I learned to self sooth by buying things from her. I am also an artist and a crafter. When you talk about how much potential your art supplies have - I really felt seen. Mostly, I wanted to comment on this particular video because of how smart and self aware you are.. The way you clearly talk about why things have value to you really helps me understand myself (and my mom). And you are so kind and understanding to yourself - I love your self compassion. This last winter was so hard - the pandemic, depression, cPTSD and S.A.D. along with buying a house and moving really laid me low. I couldn't get to my art and craft supplies and I felt so terrible. I coped by buying ( and over buying). It's spring now and i feel so much better. I've cleared a path in my studio and I am looking at things with fresher eyes. I can see a lot of these things as the cost of surviving the winter. Watching you clear your space ( and your focus on what is important to you (your family, charity) has been the boost I need to let go of these items now that they no longer serve me. Many thanks!
I get that the sensory thing is important. I'm not particularly crafty, but I've made baby quilts and throw pillow covers using a patchwork style from old clothes I loved. The most popular and requested, haha, was a baby quilt I've done for several family members. It was 3 sections of clothesline with a sun and clouds, with little clothes cut from pieces like my grandfather's postal shirt, a skirt of my grandmother's, my parents bedroom sheets that hits my sis and I because we both made their bed all the time when my mom worked, old adorable baby clothes, etc. Also decorate them with the buttons, especially the ones you recognize.. You get the idea. And I'm 65 so you know I've got some really old stuff going waaaay back.I love you! Even though you are so the mom I dreaded seeing at 7am soccer games because you were dressed to the nines, hair, makeup all perfect. Bleh! I have a severe sleep disorder so I was the mom hunched over my coffee thermos in sweats, lucky if I brushed my hair. My victory was getting my kid there on time. 🤷♀️ keep it up, you've inspired me to really get at the crap I haven't dealt with in years and years.
I know exactly what you mean by owned items being connected with memory. I think there is even research showing that hoarders' memory is wired differently than non-hoarders' memory. Being as it may, it feels as if I am giving myself Alzheimer's syndrome when I get rid of things, as the memory associated with these things will disappear along with them.
November 2023. Yesterday, I took a pile of books and magazines to the library. Today, I have another bag of stuff for Goodwill. I own 5 long-sleeved tees, and 3 sweat shirts. I have 2 dressy pairs of slacks and 3 pairs of jeans. You've made lots of progress. Tina, Al's wife
Keep going! Decluttering is like a muscle. It only gets stronger if you keep persisting on using it. I have a room that I have to walk in every day, set a timer for 15 minutes and declutter. No music no distractions: just declutter. (I realize that it's not the KonMari method, but it's what's working for me.) A book that really helped my way of thinking to help me let go of stuff (because I love love my stuff but my home was overflowing) was "Decluttering at the Speed of Life" by Dana K. White. In a nutshell, she talks about your home being a container and fitting everything in your container. I'm learning to be okay with the uncomfortable feelings that accompany each "loss" (it's scary!) because my goal (a simplified, clean home) has to outweigh my feelings. What also helps is to follow the FlyLady. She has divided the house into different zones and each month you rotate through your zones. Eventually you have less and less, and your home is cleaner and cleaner. Your goals need to outweigh your feelings. You'll get there because you've already started! Big hug from sunny SC!
Funny thing I watch so many channels where people have whole bedrooms they turn into closets I bet if most of them did this it would resemble we just don't call them hoarders cause the stuff is neat just like extreme couponers have stockpiles it's all an obsession gone out of control a.k.a hoarding it's still a love for things imagine how disciplined they have to be to contain it all in one space
The “sparks joy” method is not going to work for you because you’re finding joy in too many pieces of clothing. Instead, you need to ask yourself if you wear that item in the relevant season. If not worn , get rid of it. Try not to attach memories to clothing or you will never get rid of anything.
Sharon Ozvenom you are absolutely right. As a hoarder I overvalue, attach memories & stories or humanize the object. Once I can detach myself...this decluttering process will become so much easier ♥️
@@ahoardersheart any clothes that have given you joy check to see if u have any photos wearing the item, if you have keep a photo album of all your lovely stuff. Then you will find it easier to let go KNOWING that u have the memory in your heart and also a photographic memory of when u wore that item. Then you have a picture story book of what you wore. Letting go will accelerate your acceptance of where u are now and help u focus on where you want to be xxx
@@ahoardersheart i was a hoar too, I found myself doing this process in phases, The first phase, I gave away 20 garbage bags...HUGE! I was so happy with living with open spaces that provided, it helped me to declutter and go for phase 2. Hope that helps!
So happy that you speak what's going on with your anxiety. I have hoarder tendencies, I grew up with a hoarder mother and can understand where you're coming from
Don't feel embarrassed... you acknowledged that you have more stuff that you need and you are trying to change it.... that is a huge step and you can be very proud of it :)
Think how you want your house and life to be after declutter. Keep that vision in mind while decluttering (you can create a mood board and have it on sight). When deciding what to keep ask your self does this item help me reaching my goal and vision? Would i buy this again? And remember decluttering is a skill to learn! More you do it, easier it will be. And sorry about my english. Keep up good work!
Enni p thank you so much for all your advice & words of encouragement!!! These are definitely new questions I need to ask myself!! I’m grateful you shared that with me ♥️
What I go by is: if I have to store it or shove it in the back of the closet, I'm not using it and can't see it, so it's really not part of my life and it's got to go.
I think a better question for you and me in the case of books would be 'does this help me have joy in my current chapter of life or am I hanging onto memories because I I don't or can't enjoy My life now?'
Kate dscribe ohhhhh...what a beautiful analogy with the books!!!! I absolutely love that and will write it in my journal ♥️♥️ Thank you for sharing that with me!!!
@@ahoardersheart you are welcome. Another way I found to help me decluttering is pretend the house is on fire. Literally take five minutes, get your clothes out and grab the ones you absolutely must have or make you happiest and carry them outside to safety. It reduces the opportunity to humanize or anthropomorphize belongings. Do that with each category and you'll see what really matters to you.
Seeing you go through this and your thoughts reflect mine looking at all of our stuff it is difficult to part with things it gives me so much anxiety, you inspire me to tackle our stuff
In this old of white an grey you're such a colourful and Sparky person. I was looking for a organization video but couldn't get any motivation from the videos where all the clothes looked the same and were so few. I too have many clothes and most of them are as old as 20 years. Inspiring video. thank you !
I love that you're so honest about your process. I think most people judge hoarders by the show and most of us aren't like that. I appreciate your strength and it gives me strength on my own journey. Thank you!
I am laughing with you as I'm exactly the same and like you said humanise my stuff and have strong attachments. It helps me so much more watching a fellow hoarder who has same struggles as I do rather than a professional organiser
Dear Lord in heaven! Help this dear one! Letting go isn't easy. I know exactly how you feel. I put stuff in a declutter bag because they were too small for me. The bags sat in a corner until the bags decomposed when I picked them up. I got the clothes out, looked at them, I had lost weight. I tried them on and kept them. I'm right there with you girl. I have boxes and boxes I have to go through. I don't even want to deal with it. I was thinking of getting racks and hanging them in my garage and going out and shopping my stash every morning like a store. But that is my veiled attempt to keep things I have not worn. As we grow older and transition, our lives change and we stop wearing certain clothing. I attach memories as well to my clothes. Man! its hard!
Thank you for sharing your story with me ♥️ We can do this together if you like! I know as a hoarder...I feel alone, like I’m the only person who does this. Or thinks like this. All of my friends are so “OCD clean.” I wanted this to be a channel we’re people can share their struggles together & we can be encouraging to each other ♥️♥️ Many Blessings 🌟
same here it is very hard! and the "did you wear it in a year" in my opinion also does not work as a question for a hoarder - or for me anyway - there are a lot of things I have not been able to do/enjoy BECAUSE of the hoarding and depression and specifically for clothes also because of weight fluctuations...I do get into my nice clothes again and wear them and I am not going to re-buy my clothes every time my weight changes...(which I am working on as well) so I can relate it is hard!! sending you both "clearing energy" 💕
I found it helped me to let go of a lot of clothing (about 3/4 of my stuff) by changing my mind set. Instead of thinking of what the clothing represented of my past or perhaps that I might need it in the future, I looked at everything in the present. I asked myself "do I love it and am using it in my life now?" As I proceeded with my de-cluttering, it became easier. It was very liberating for me to let go of things I loved from the past. I never regretted anything that I let go and I am now working on other categories. Best wishes on your journey.
First of all, you did such a great job so far! Also, I would love to watch you do a time lapse or something of going through every item! (I like long videos hahaha). But some advice, since everything sparks joy, try to look at how often you use the item, how practical it is for your life going forward, if you saw it in a store now would you buy it again, etc. And don’t feel bad about that bin you aren’t ready to let go of! I do the same thing. I go through my closet periodically and pull out things I’m definitely not wearing, but sometimes those items sit in a bag for a few months as I let them go one by one.
valley180 thank you so so much for your love & support ♥️♥️ I’m still learning how to edit on my iPhone & I will learn how to time-lapse...that’s a great idea!!! And I love what you said...if I was at the store, would I still buy it. I have had that thought for more valuable items that I indecisive of selling or keeping. Example: we had a Pokémon card worth $300. I thought, “Would I buy it for $300 in the store?” The answer was no so we sold it. Now I didn’t think about doing it with all my things...just items with high monetary value. Thank you so much for that ♥️♥️♥️
I really love these videos, it's so awesome to hear your process and see your progress. I can tell when you're not excited by an object, your tone of voice changes! That's been really helpful for me to notice in you, because now I can use that as a tool for myself. Thank you!
I’ve never seen such an organised hoarder with a cute taste! Usually hoarders keep rubbish like giveaway shirts or pretty generic items or stuff they get on sale just because they’re cheap even if they’re not their style. I’m not a hoarder but would have a hard time parting ways with such nice clothes. Kudos to you for doing so 👍🏻
One of the things I've had to accept is that every little bit helps, even though I /want/ big quick dramatic changes. I've been deep-cleaning out my apartment over the last six months, and I wanted to be done by New Year's. It's now April and I still have a ways to go. 😅 But each time I give away even one small bag of clothes or an old coffee mug or whatever, that's one less thing in the pile. It /does/ add up over time. I've probably gotten rid of a third of the things I've owned (with a way still to go) and it's just been a little bit at a time, trying to keep a steady stream. Don't worry if you can't do it all at once. Any progress /is/ progress.
I know this is an old video but I had to comment. I have no idea how you did this! I can't contemplate doing this with my clothes. I'm having to do it gradually by wearing the same thing over and over until it's getting tatty. The only things I can get rid of easily is where I've made an obvious mistake buying it and it's the wrong size or doesn't work for my body. I'm in awe of you doing this massive declutter on your clothes all at once
Sometimes its easier, if you find it overwhelming, sort into sections, eg, do all your tshirts first etc. When I helped my hording parents do their clothes, it was easier for my dad to see just the 30 like items at once, and from that pick his favorites to keep, rather than seeing the hundreds of clothes to go through, and we managed to reduce probably more dramatically as each section was less overhelming. Regarding your box of excess winter clothes, maybe set a date to revist it and if you havent needed to take anything from it, consider purging some more of it then. Sometimes we just need to give ourselves more time to realise we dont really want it in the long run and it IS OK to let it go ☺
I am a hoarder from a long line of "collectors" and emotional folks. I'm very connected to my clothing. In doing (trying) this process, I started with all my bottoms: skirts, pants, capris, shorts etc. Those are the least emotional. Then I did dresses, because those are a very clear feeling of joy to hone that "spark" finding. Shirts and sweaters etc have been an ongoing process but I've gotten to: 1) "LOVE", 2)"hoarder brain loves"😊, 3) i need to "date" to assess if the (humanized) clothing and I are a good match, and 4) donations. I'm requiring myself to go on one "date" with category three clothing a week. And that has ended up with about 70% not being my sole mate. I totally feel you on this process and thank you for being so real 🙏
Baby steps are still moving forward. I'm excited for you to begin your journey, and it will take the time out takes. You go girl! You can do it! For my own experience, I've found that after going through all my clothes ~1 time a year for the last 2-3 years, things I held onto the first time, and even the second time, by the time I got to the third year I still hadn't used them or loved them, I felt free to release them. As I've moved forward, I've improved at letting things go earlier. Sending you high fives!
Feb.2023. When I get tired, I watch one of these old videos. I have a small closet, 1/2 full. Then, an overnight bag with summer clothes. I have a washer and dryer in my condo, so I don't need many clothes. Tina, Al's wife
I appreciate you sharing all these emotional challenges that you are facing! You may want to read the Kon Mari book and watch her first series, so that you actually have a really solid understanding of what her process is. It may make it easier for you to apply! Because I can see from the first moment that you are fuzzy on what the whole thing is about, so it's not much helping you. But you did part with a bunch of pieces, so very proud of you for making space in your life (and basement) for more joy and less clutter!
'I feel a lot of embarrassment and anxiety, I feel overwhelmed' I GET YOU SO MUCH. I have recently moved and even though I decluttered beforehand I saw in my new home it wasn't enough! My rules now are: - if it doesn't fit properly, sell or donate. - if it makes me look red in the face when I wear it without makeup, sell or donate. - if it's holding on by its last thread, throw away. - if I feel uncomfortable or ridiculous in it no matter what I wear with it, sell or donate. Just because I like it on other women doesn't mean I'll ever wear it. Even better if I can give it to friends, so I can still see the items, and they wear it so much better than me :) I have a few scarves, belts and shoes left to do. Maybe some more dresses. Wish me luck!
Bravo to you for recognizing that hoarding is a problem for you! Bravo to you for tackling a problem that is so difficult for you! Bravo to you for exercising your decision-making skills! I think that getting down to 1 bin of winter clothes that you don’t wear is impressive! Though your clothes are sentimental for you, I think that you’re recognizing the value of this activity; not only are you gaining space, gaining control, putting importance on moving forward, but I think you’ll see that if you don’t “down-size” now, you’re going to need to keep repeating this time-consuming activity; which will take away from future enjoyment of time that you could be spending with your family or doing something that you enjoy. Good for you - great job!
i appreciate this being an actual hoarder video and not like a lot of the videos on youtube where people call themselves hoarders but are really just collectors with no emotional attachment to the items
You are amazing! You plunged right in and kept right at it. You are sweet to let us in on it so we can learn from you and get energized from your successes.
Thank you for sharing your journey with us. I am about to go through this process myself and I am already feeling the anxiety and I haven't even started yet. Keep up the great work!
I would imagine a hoarder decluttering using this method would be tricky since everything seems to fall more into the sentimental category. You're doing good 🥰 definitely try reading the whole tidying up book tho, because you will become more emotionally aware of why things became like this and be guaranteed to not repeat because your eyes and heart are open to fully healing.
I am thrilled for you making so much progress! I have struggled with attaching to things as well, but I also get anxiety from clutter. Sometimes I just feel paralyzed when I am trying to do a declutter. But, progress is progress and it will inspire you in the future! Great job.
That is exactly how I feel inside too. I’m one Valium away from a Panic Attack when I declutter 😅. That why I laugh at myself or act silly. If I’m laughing, my anxiety stays calm. And Thank you for your encouraging message ♥️ It really helps me in this journey 🌟
I think you did an awesome job ! It's hard to let go of things for some of us hoarders....Truely. I'm proud of you and you inspired me to go back and tackle and finish the exact same project in my own closet. I love unicorns and sparkly things too. Big Hugs to you! Keep posting because it's helping other people. Don't listen to the haters and negative people.
I love your channel so much I go back to old vids sometimes for motivation☺️ I hope you are able to choose what brings you joy, and let go of the attachments. Clothes might tell a story of a certain time of your life, but YOU can tell that story. The wonderful person that YOU have become, speaks volume. You are a beautiful, loving and strong person now because of all your past. And so much awaits you in the future💕 Happy decluttering💕
Hard to know where to start. When I was moving, my lawyer boy suggested I separate out what I really wanted to keep. Then pack up the rest...and get a non-judgemental person to help. Easier to detach when you are not alone. Many people can identify. God bless you.
My mom was a hoarder. You are dealing with your issues. When I worked in an office, I had three pairs of dressy slacks, maybe a half dozen shirts, etc. I made a chart of all the combinations I could make. Tina
Thank you so much for doing this, for being you, for being real about how you process your thoughts ... I kept saying to myself you sound just like me!!!! I’ve been working through healing myself and understanding the issues surrounding hoarding for myself and my life. THANK YOU for sharing your journey! I want to give you a hug. We all need that ... 🥳🤗
Oh your message made me so so happy 💜🙏🏻💜 That’s why I created this channel!!! So people know they are not alone in this and together we can clean out our clutter & heal from hoarding!!!
I'm proud of you! You are killing it! I'm really proud of you for even posting this vulnerable side of you! I hope you know your helping others by posting this! Keep up the great work!!
I think you did really well! You were able to part with things that seemed to have been hard for you, and that's kinda the whole idea of the KonMari. We only want to keep things that truly fit into our lives that we want for ourselves.
You could always do what I do with my kids artwork- take a picture of it then put the pic in a photo album with a little thing when beside it of who did it what- it is the date etc etc. Instead of that you could journal about what that cute piece of clothing reminds you of etc and some memories... if you could just go thru and take the pictures.... then the things that you think you can part with because you will have a picture and the memories written down... you can go ahead ands donate the clothing and get excited for the memories that someone else will get to make with those clothes- then you can print the pics ..out stick them in a photo album or even just a notebook and theb write beside each one about what it reminds yout of and fun memories of what you did while wearing it etc..... when you are done with all the pics- and writing tnhe memories down etc.- you have a beautiful personal history/ journal that you can keep ands pass down to your kids one- day so they will have a whole journal of memories of your life! Plus fun pics- to go along with it! You can do this with any of the things you are getting rid of... the kids toys or little knick knacks .....that you don't really even look at anymore but you have a memory attached to it- so get the memory out of your brain and write it down and take a pic.... because if the items are just stored .....in the basement.... no one is getting joy out of it... ands certainly no one is getting to enjoy the memories that you are keeping in your heart!!! ...get those memories out of your heart and onti paper or even just start a free blog and keep it private ands when you take the pic you can just upload it to a blog post then you can write all about the season of your life and fun memories of yout wearing the outfit or what the knick knack reminds you of.... then just hit post and it's there forever .on your private blog. Would take you a few minutes or even if you want to gi in detail etc then do it in the evening before bed or something. Then after you hit publish take the item and donate it and while you are driving ti the donation place- think about all of the memories that someone else is going to get to have now with the item... aand think about the fact that maybe someone really really needed that item or had been looking everywhere for something like it and how excited they'll be. Also think about the fact that you will be blessing- someone and in return not only will you have the organized house of your dreams- ....but you will have an incredible journal of your life. If you do the quick free blog way ( which is what I suggest!!!) ...there are websites where they will print your blog like a book.... then you can get a couple copies of yiour super fun and unique journal ands have them forever and havr to pass down to yiour kids. I love to journal. I have my whole life and my mom even journaled for me from the day she found ir she was pregnabt with me until I turned 8 aand took over for myself. I have my whole life except for two bad years that i threw away when I was a teen.. ugh teenagers lol-...... anyway I have most of my life up until today documented in some way . It will be my legacy for my children. Im trying to slowly but surely get the journals typed up into a free private blog with pics etc so i can have it printed when i'm done for my children. ❤
@@ahoardersheart no problem!!! I hope it helps!! I would love a book like that lol. It gave me ideas of what I could use to do something like that for memories!! 💕
Andi Jackson thank you so so much for your encouraging message ♥️ It really means the world to me!! I feel so vulnerable sharing all of this but when I read kind comments like yours...I know I’m doing the right thing!!
Awww, you're doing awesome. People need others to be open and vulnerable. We all learn from each other. I like to think of everybody as snowflakes. We are all differently beautiful in our own ways. No one snowflake is better than the other. I went through my own process of getting rid of many many things. I say I'm a hoarder in recovery. But at any minute, I could relapse! I just went to Goodwill today. Only took $8.... I spent all $8.
I used to hold on to things, especially cloths and papers. I didn't really mind how messy things where around me. But about 3 years ago I broke down from depression, stress and anxiety(because of unrelated stuff) and after that I couldn't handel the mess I created anymore without going down the same spiral of stress and anxiety. I had to forced myself to get rid of stuff even if it was hard. And it has taken time. a lot of time. And I've gone though the same categories more than once. I'm still doing it. And I still collect things. But I feel a lot calmer now than what I did 3 years ago. Or even 1 year ago.
Congratulations on starting this journey. The fact that you recognize it is great. Just take baby steps to help keep your anxiety levels down. Like eating the Elephant, one bite at a time 😊
You are doing so good! Its ok to keep a few sentimental clothes! I struggle with clothes too. Between weight changes, style changes, and career changes I feel like I have 3 persons clothes! But I am working on it too! A simple trick I picked up that works well for hanging clothes is to hang up with the hanger backwards, and set a time limit, I go with a year because that covers all seasons and events. Whatever hasn't been worn you let go.
I think you need to set a goal (ie 4 Rubbermaid bins- though I'd aim lower, personally lol) per season. So, say, a total of 8 bins, 4 per "wardrobe". Then when they get full, you'll truly find your favorites. I do this when I shop for clothing, I have a one in, one out rule. So if I buy those cute shoes, what am I going to go home and get rid of? I have half of a standard closet and one dresser (not counting my winter coats) and don't rotate my wardrobe out for each season. It fits or something has to go. I don't know if any of that resonates with you, but I hope it's helpful. And hey, you may not be perfect but you're putting in the work. Keep it up!!!
I used to have about the same amount of clothes. I did the Konmari method and got rid of a lot of it because I wasn't wearing them. A lot of my clothes were truly ugly and hand me downs. I only regretted donating one of my shirts from high school and I got rid of it because the fabric is heavy and I live in the south, where it can be 80+ degrees at midnight. I gotta say that yours is the type of channel I've been looking for, for inspiration because I also humanize items and have issues letting go. I'm planning on trying a new system for the next month to see if it helps me.
I just discovered your channel, LOL, I'm not alone, in fact WAY more clothes than you. I totally relate to the overwhelm, the memories, the identity and all that attachment. We're currently on lockdown in New Zealand, so if one good thing is gonna come out of this covid pandemic, it's gotta be decluttering and culling the copious amount of clothes, shoes, and everything else I have acquired over my life. Thanks for the inspiration and motivation.
I love your clothes too! They’re so colorful and pretty. And I love how they remind you of your life story. I know this video is over 3 years old, and I don’t know where ups are in your journey today. I was thinking of what a joy it may be to write the stories down that go with the different items of clothing. That way you’re sharing your memories with others and those items of clothes could spark joy for those who love you, especially your children and other family members. Best of luck in your journey. Thank you for sharing your heart. ❤️
Instead of 'sparks joy', as a hoarder, instead ask yourself if you love how it makes you look, right now, today. Try it on if you arent sure. Another good question that worked for my dad was, would you buy it today?
Thank you so much for your great advice!!! I will have to do that from now on!!!
I started my decluttering journey (I can't believe I just used the J word lol) early 2018 and I had clothes that I never wore, not because I didn't like them or because they didn't fit me, but because I thought they looked stupid ON ME. So I kept passing over them every morning because there was no way I could go outside in them. There was nothing wrong with the clothes, it was entirely about me and how I feel about myself, but the fact remained that I wasn't ever going to wear them, so they had to go. If I wouldn't put it on right now and walk out of the house in it, it has to go. It was so hard, and i'm not even in to fashion.
I use the `would I buy this at the shops today?`
Great suggestion
Yes because of fashion people buy what's in the now. For me I just buy the basics so have something to wear.
"because the majority of these clothes spark joy" YES!! That is what it's like to be a hoarder!! Although as I go along, I start to discover that as a borderline hoarder, I have trouble discerning between, "it sparks emotion" and "it sparks joy." My wires get crossed, and I think that "emotional" means "joyful." I'm getting better at it now!
I resonate SO much with you. I am also a hoarder, and was getting anxiety just from watching you go through your clothes, knowing that I have to do the same. I felt your nervous laugh through and through...you didn't even have to explain that it was your way of holding back tears. I immediately knew how you felt. You putting this on the internet is so brave, but more so it helps your fellow hoarders so much, knowing that we are not alone in our way of thinking. THANK YOU!!!
I'm glad to see someone like myself (a hoarder) declutter. I also have chronic fatigue syndrome and depression so it's so so difficult to do it 😟❤🇬🇧
me too
@@Helen-us1ly 🤗
@angelamele67 me too and chronic neck, back and hip pain from arthritis!!! makes it so difficult to do everyday tasks, much less take on getting rid of my hoard!!! going to counseling this week for the first time as I am ready to get my house back! I just can't live like this anymore!!! I just can't!!! hope you are doing better 3 yrs. down the road...
I think you're courageous! And 100 items is a LOT of stuff, so don't listen to the negative comments.
Thank you so much 🙏🏻♥️ That means the world to me!
Talking through the emotions is very powerful. Your doing an awesome job. You’re not the only one winning at the end. Your marriage, children, and family all win as well.
O"HAPPY DAYS thank you so so much ♥️♥️ You’re so right, my family benefits as well and that is the main reason to keep going!
and US
One thing I've done for sentimental clothing/ items is to time capsule it into a bin. I have one high school bin and one college bin. It lets me feel like I can tangibly keep who I was while not taking up tons of space. It has really helped me emotionaly while I let go of things. 💖
Start by getting rid of everything that doesnt fit. Then everything you have not worn in a year. Then go from there. Be ruthless. You can do this. Keep an eye on the prize... what is your goal for your home? Write it down and focus on that.
Thank you so much!!! Yesss...eye on the prize 🏆♥️
Im doing something similar on my channel im gonna take your advice
I wish you would try it on before throwing it out just because you haven’t worn it in a year. Maybe you didnt wear it because the other incidentals we’re blocking its energy
I don’t agree with getting rid of things that don’t fit as my weight goes up and down quite regularly plus I have a few items from being young and with a tiny waist as memories.I also have a case of vintage clothes that I’ve collected .
The thing with Konmari is it takes months. Even on the show she’s with them over months. So if it’s hard it’s okay, it’s supposed to be hard to change habits;) you’re doing great!
Shaina Kelley thank you so much for your encouraging message...it truly helps me when I feel like I’m struggling ♥️
It's taken me years, and I still struggle with certain areas, clothes, books, papers.
@@ahoardersheart sometimes the fear and anxiety of letting things go gets big. So chose the joyful items first. Feel gratitude for all the beautiful memories you will remember doing this xx
Im glad you said this. I thought i was being slow because its taken several weeks going through different parts of 2 bedrooms. Ive gotten rid of about 3 boxes of shoes and atleast 10 boxes of clothes. Over the past day or two ive gotten together 3 boxes of books that are being donated. It's an ongoing process.
Right. But to be fair... they allow one week for clothes
Dear @A Hoarder's Heart -- You are about the most honest person I've come across regarding this trend of decluttering for us hoarders. Thank you for articulating so many things I can relate to but I could not put into words. You are definitely not alone. Thank you for putting a voice to what many of us experience. I feel many of the comments here are made by folks who are not able to understand your/our situation. I, too, put a lot of attachment onto things. I, too, keep nearly everything -- clothes, craft items, paper, cards, bits that could come in handy someday.... I have a poor memory and physical items (not pictures) help me remember. The idea of photographing everything and writing about it overwhelms me even more than keeping items, so that strategy won't work for me. So what am I to do?
I've been giving my hoarding a lot of thought lately -- I am in the process of moving *and* I have a moth problem -- or maybe it is not really a problem because I have to touch and clean everything and throw some items away. And the thought came to me during this process -- Do I really need to hold on to the *memories* and the past?? This is a revolutionary turn of thinking for me. Will I really lose the memory of a past event if I toss a physical reminder? And if I do forget something because I toss the physical item, is that alright? Can I live with it? What am I afraid of losing? And why am I so attached to the *memories* my stuff evokes? While I ask myself these questions, I have no answers. Perhaps challenging my need for memories and loss gets me into an uncomfortable place and perhaps that is a better place than ignoring my problem.
I just subscribed to your channel and I support whatever you do, however you do it, in whatever time it takes you. I hope you never feel that you must declutter just because "your audience" expects you to. Thank you for sharing your journey, wherever it takes you. Blessings and strength. --nina.
I just want to say that your message has filled my heart with so much happiness ♥️ This is the exact intention of my channel. To be completely honest with my hoarding, let non-hoarders understand how my hoarder mind is “wired” and to let other hoarders know that they are not alone. I have full faith that we can heal from our hoarding. I am learning to detach myself from my items as well. I’m learning that I am my smile and my laugh! I am not a sweater or a necklace. I keep repeating this to myself. And I feel the same way as you...pictures don’t really help. I wonder if it’s a sensory issue bc I need to see or touch it to feel that comfort of holding onto it. I’m so glad you found me! I feel like we can learn a lot from each other ♥️
@@@ahoardersheart -- First off, you are so courageous for undertaking this journey publicly. I am glad you wear glasses and do what makes you feel comfortable. It is enough to hear your thoughts and watch your progress. Who really needs to know your exact identity anyway? Second, you are kind-hearted -- the fact that you may feel one way, but respond to a commenter's suggestion in a positive way, never dismissing, is beautiful. For example, many have suggested you take pictures of your items before you toss them (as well-meaning friends have said to me), and you graciously thank each person for their idea.
Somewhere along the way, IMHO, the KonMari "method" of decluttering has gotten co-opted to mean "minimalism" and I believe that is not the intent, tho I profess, I have not read Marie Kondo's books. Instead my journey with stuff is teaching me about being a caretaker -- Maybe I want 500 books, but I must love them enough to take care of them. Same with my clothes. Maybe it is ok that I have t-shirts from college and coffee mugs from vacations I took decades ago, and that is ok *as long as I take care of them*. We each have to define what it means to take care of our things. For me, I have a lot of stuff in boxes hidden behind other boxes so I don't see it. Because I am simultaneously preparing to move *and* battling pantry and clothing moths (go ahead, be horrified -- sometimes I am too -- but mostly I am ok with them because they allow me to purge), I have to open every box and ask myself not whether something sparks joy (bc everything does-- I love my stuff), but I have to ask if I am willing to take care of the item going forward. My stuff deserves better care than I've given -- too many woolens are now moth eaten because I didn't take good care of them. Food is spoiled because I didn't take care of it. I am realizing that I have only so much energy to take care of my possessions, so my current approach is asking what do I have the energy to keep. And as I said before, what memories am I willing to let go when I get rid of clothing or paper or gifts or coffee mugs.
Thanks. It feels like I'm taking a break from my sorting and packing to have a quick cup of coffee with you, a new friend who understands the heartbreak, the heartache, the ridicule, the difficulty, the emotions, and so much more; but also a friend who Does Not Judge Me. Now I feel that when I get discouraged, I can come to your channel and watch and listen to you and feel a community That You Created. You rock, you know that? All the best to you as you share your journey.
@@nsavar5864 thank you so much for writing this...it is so hard, so isolating and so shaming to live like this and it really helps to find those who resonate...I have thought about this lately too, of the fact that the things I keep are things that need to be taken care of, that need time, and space and energy, and attention....
I love this train of thought on memories. this is a real process of letting go, of much more than tangible visible concrete items... thank you so much Nina for sharing this...this is such a debilitating mental space, at least for me, this hoarding is like living in a frozen hell...everything gets stuck and just blocks...
Many of the items I try to part with bring happy memories.. before my son died.. before I was depressed, before my mom died… but many of the things I try to part with also make me sad. It feels paralyzing.. but I also have wondered what life would be like without all of this stuff & the memories. I honestly think I would be happier. I remember what life was like when I didn’t have stuff. When I was 23 I literally owned one cardboard box of stuff, and a backpack of clothes. When I moved into the first house I bought I didn’t have furniture to fill the rooms. The closets were bare. The basement was empty. 40 years later every single closet is full, every bed has full storage bins under it, the basement is chuck full. I built a shed specifically to move bins of hoarded memorabilia into it to make room in the house. My house is clean, and the living areas are “happy”.. but everything is TOO full. It’s not all mine though, I am NOT a shopper… somehow it has all accumulated… a lot of it is the contents of my mom’s house that I emptied after she died (she was an organized hoarder and kept every interesting thing that our now deceased elders had collected- they were artists, writers, gardeners, photographers, etc). A lot of it is my daughter’s- every time she moved or downsized from college on up for 10-12 years. She travels the world and collects vintage clothes & curiosities. It is OVERWHELMING. Prior to when my mom died, I had spent YEARS sorting, & purging and “organizing” and had FINALLY gotten it down to one room in the basement that was full of bins. I was ready to airbnb my home and travel. Then my mom needed my help for a while, and then she died, & seemingly overnight my house was full again. I am exhausted and depressed because of it, and where at other times in my life I had the energy, motivation and focus to optimistically work on it.. I no longer do. I have barely done anything about it since bringing all the stuff from my mom’s house in 2021. I am wondering if I just had some major yard sales, and donated the rest of it how unhappy would I be? I feel like I would feel free. I feel like I would stop being depressed. Like I could start over in life. Like I would no longer feel paralyzed. I came here today (first time seeing this channel) hoping to find inspiration.. I did a google search for “Hoarder to minimalist in 30 days” 😂 I will keep looking. I think I REALLY need to figure out the overnight method. I can’t go on living this way; I am so, so unhappy. And it’s definitely because of the overwhelming burden of having so much stuff and feeling like there is no hope.
What helps me to let things go is to ask myself, “do I want to take this item forward to the next phase of my life?”.
If you want to move forward with reducing your stuff, decide what you don’t want to take forward in your life, thank the item for the joy it gave you and let it go.
Just like some toys, some clothes are meant for a reason or a season, not as part of a permanent collection. Good luck my beauty!
ArtJourneyUK what a wonderful idea...thank you so much for that insight!! If I want my next phase of life to have less clutter & less hoarder attachments...then the answer is quite clear. Thank you for showing me a new perspective ♥️
I love the idea of asking if an item (clothing or otherwise) is something I want to wear/use moving forward. Thank you for sharing
Hope everything is good Lily! Missing your videos!
lily! where ya been? I really miss you. hope all is well.
Miss you Lily!! Hope to see more of you.
I helped my friend who was a hoarder, she had more clothes than you. She sounded exactly like you. I had to sit with her and handed her one article of clothing at a time. We made huge progress! But then she never got around to the next step of the Kon Marie method. So she still has a home full of things but at least it’s not over flowing with clothes. At least your brave enough to put your experience on TH-cam to share
Awe, thank you so so much 💜🦄💜 That’s why I’m sharing my heart as a hoarder...so ppl can understand they are not alone and that they can do it too! You friend was strong enough to do her clothes...she is also strong enough to do the other categories too 💜💜 It’s baby steps with hoarders...one day at a time!
I loved hearing you encourage the clothes to go forth and bring others joy. I don't use the KonMari method but a lot of my clients find success in doing two passes (on whatever category of items we are going through.)💛
The more you do this, the easier it will become. I think you did a great job and I loved that you talked things out with your clothes. It's really nice to see you be honest about what you are experiencing. It helps others to know that they are not alone and that they can change, too.
Thank you so much 🙏🏻💜 This is my intention of the channel...to let other hoarders know they are not alone ♥️
First of all, I LOVE how colorful and how much character your wardrobe has. It seems like you really show yourself and your personality through what you wear, so perhaps starting with your wardrobe would have been a more difficult place to start. But look at how well you did!!! You still were able to let go of a number of pieces and that’s what matters. The decluttering doesn’t have to happen in one go, it can take 2, 7, 20 times. What matters is that you remind yourself of the goals you set and what you want from your life, and you just keep taking the baby steps to get there. I’m proud of you! And I think you did an amazing job. Just take it one day at a time :)
Katie Pags oh thank you so much for sweet uplifting message ♥️♥️ It really means the world to me!!! And you are right, perhaps my clothes were too high on the emotion side to tackle all at once!! I am willing to try any cleaning/decluttering Challenge to see what works best with my hoarding mindset!! But baby steps is still will move me forward ♥️
I totally agree. You did great!! That bin you filled with winter stuff that you haven’t worn but just couldn’t part with? It’s out of your closet... so that is an excellent declutter right there. It will wait patiently in your basement until one day you will pull it out and be ready to say... These clothes hold lovely old memories, but I have so many great newer fresher memories so NOW I can let you go calmly, with joy.
I am in the process of decluttering too. I downsized hard (and fast) after a divorce going into a much smaller place than I used to live. It’s been 3 years. It took me a year to open some of the boxes, poke through them and get rid of some of it... last year it was a bit easier. I am ready to dig into them again and let go of more. Maybe a lot more? Eventually I will get through all of it. Baby steps.
A Hoarder's Heart Don’t think the video is too long when you are showing your decision making process as that is what people like me(a slowly recovering hoarder)enjoy the most.There are are plenty of vlogs where people talk about things at the beginning of the process and lots of organising ones but not enough on why you keep/let go of things.For those of us that love our clothes we totally relate to you😁
11:14 "The problem is that I humanize things" wow, that spoke to me. My mom and I both hold onto things that we don't really need and I think this is why. What a wonderful way to look at this and brings a lot of insight. I'm sending this video to her, maybe we can start to purge together!
I can't explain how much I appreciate how raw and relatable and REAL you are in documenting decluttering! I've been watching youtube "closet cleanout" videos for probably 2 years now and all are either glamourized by skipping over the real piles/overwhelm or overdramatize "decluttering closet" as clickbait. Just had my ripe old age of 26 birthday last weekend and struggling with chronic physical illness + having both my sisters move out, (knowing im next), am panicked it's time for my process to progress with this. I didnt think my attachment to clothes for memories was shared with the same nuances and mindset as anyone bc i too struggle with anxiety/adhd/forgetting/sensory issues is so specific and scarce of finding anyone to really be understanding. I'm inspired to get going and might even try filming it too and not be ashamed of having attachments (all it means is my heart and head get too heavy in expressing emotion physically!) ♡ Much love & thanks to you 💕💫🌸
Checking in one year later and sending love.
Thanks for being so real. You are delightful.
As the daughter of a hoarder, I'm just so happy that you're trying all the things and finding what works for you!!
Thank you so so much 🙏🏻♥️!!! Your encouragement helps me on this journey!!!
I saw your interview with Dawn from the Minimal mum and I decided to check out your channel. You are great and so funny..and so brave!!! ❤ I was laughting and crying at the same time, because it was as wathing myself. I was always saying that "spark joy"Konmari method is not very useful for us hoarders, because every peace of my clothes and other items sparks joy in me. And it always feels like parting forever with a good friend or a dear pet. I am struggling to declutter and have already parted with more than 130 kg of clothes and it is not even 1/3 of the clothes that I own. It is so hard but we can do it! Thank you so much for your honesty and help! Sending hoarders love from Europe, Croatia!
I feel like a lot of people search for MarieKondo videos to just watch people chuck things out with barely any effort as motivation for how easy it could be. But as a very sentimental person too I struggled with it! It was nice to see someone else experiencing the frustration 😂
John Smith lol, right!!! People would toss stuff and I’d already had 5 uses for it 😅 I will admit this was very hard for me but not impossible! We can do this...one sentimental piece at a time ♥️😅
Oh boy im decluttering my bedroom I think it might be the hardest place to start doing I did the bathroom first its the smallest place in my house kinda the easiest but my bedroom help me jesus clothes shoes I have a desk in there and guess whose in love with stationary yup this guy
I like watching M.K. but I don’t agree with her order.I don’t care about kitchen stuff etc.I am most sentimental about my clothes and books yet she says they are the easiest to get rid of.
I totally relate to how you feel about your clothes.
One of the most realistic Konmari style of tidying up videos I’ve ever seen. very much needed this. Hugs to you 🤗
Also I love that you're donating so much of it. Thrift stores and hand-me-downs are often the only ways I've clothed my kids sometimes. I'd say about 70% ish....of my own clothes are hand-me-downs. So go you for donating stuff!
Elizabeth Garrison awe, thank you so much!!! When I was a stay at home mom I used to always buy second hand & hand me downs. Now that I’m working, I’m buying new but I think it’s best for my purse & the environment to go back to that ♥️♥️♥️
It troubles me that people DON'T donate it :( our poor planet and people who need it...
So true. I donated all my stuff to a women's shelter. The only stuff that went into the trash was stuff that was worn out also socks and undies went into garbage too.
I haven’t tried the KonMari method, but I have watched a few of these videos and it appears to me that in order for this method to be effective we need to stop (but’s and if’s) because it seems like the goal is to de clutter the physical and emotional baggage that we carry. I am not ready to KonMari my house. When I do, I will be sure to truly let go of all the material things taking up space and time.
I hope we can all find the joy and peace we seek.
Thank you for sharing your journey.
Take pictures of all the clothes and other things that bring great memories and put them in a photo album that way you can always see it and remember it without it clut te ring your life
zhanne williams-chandler thank you so so much for sharing your advice with me ♥️♥️ Great idea!
I was going to suggest that :)
As someone who deals with anxiety and depression and some hoarder tendencies myself, I
am in awe of your courage...love and prayers to and for you. 🤗🙏🏻💕
Thank you for sharing so much of yourself. I appreciate that you talk through your feelings and thoughts. Makes me understand myself a whole lot more. Thank you so much for sharing!
I feel this in my soul. This is why I have so many pieces of clothing, for my kids as well because I wanted to make them quilts using some of their favorite pieces but it isn't about them being their favorite pieces so much as me remembering them as babies and throughout the years. Thank you for this video! My goal this year is to get through the clothing clutter and let it go to bless other people in need. I don't need these items, nor am I actually using any of them. They are just creating more stress in my life.
Incredible...I love you!!
I am just like you , I have memories in all my stuff. My house is a memory box. Full of thing that "spark joy" . It's so hard.. well done you. And thank you for sharing. I e been looking for someone like you for years. Its not helpful watching an organiser doing it as they don't have the emotional attachment. Thank you xx
Enjoyed the video! I always say that "does this spark joy?" will not help a hoarder. Good luck with decluttering
Thank you ♥️♥️♥️ And you are absolutely right...hoarders need to be asked a different question!!
Yes as a recovering hoarder I totally agree!
I agree, have you guys watched that show 'Consumed' on Netflix? That was helpful to me. I'm starting to get rid of things because of that show lol.
@@flaviassimas I haven't. I use to watch Hoarders and Hoarding: buried alive for motivation
@@mamaloz6200 oh yes hoarder then kondo on Netflix and Hulu is motivation.
Another good thing to remember is that you aren't "sending something away" there is no true "away"when you donate something you are allowing someone else to love it also. You can do it!
Oh I love that!!! Thank you so much 💜💗💜
This video helped me realize the importance of bringing out everything of that category so when you realize your keeping too much you can look back at the massive pile and realize you need to do more lol
Sometimes I feel like if I can just release a grocery bag full of stuff, I am making progress.
Absolutely!!! We are building good habits that way!!
Gotta start somewhere!
Yes every little bit counts
That is progress, I’m so bad I can’t even get rid of the grocery bags! It’s an addiction. Just last night my husband probably threw out a hundred grocery bags. I actually had to leave the room so I wouldn’t take them back.
I am a clothing hoarder and my hoard is about twenty times your hoard, EASY. My entire wardrobe would probably fill your whole living room. I watch so many videos, but every person that claims to be a clothing hoarder doesn’t even come close to my huge collection, and I’m starting to lose hope that there’s anyone out there like me that has conquered their mountain of clothes!!!
Girl, I feel ya! I came from a family of 7 siblings and we were very poor. My mom never got rid of clothes because all of our clothes were passed down/around. Now, I have a problem buying clothing or whatever and getting rid of stuff. Like out with the old in the with the new, it's just in in In. Lol. At least you are starting your journey and you gotta start somwhere!! Don't look at the thumbs down as a negative- I heard a TH-camr say it doesn't effect your page in a bad way- it has people interacting, so it's more a positive than a negative.
SOOOOO glad I finally found a moment to watch this video. You've done an amazing job! Thank you so much for making it, I think a lot of people will find value in your journey. Thank you also for sharing it on my channel! ❤️
A Small Wardrobe thank you so so much for watching it!! That really means to the world to me ♥️♥️ I’m trying to “rewrite” this hoarder mind of mine & your videos really inspire me to keep moving forward with my journey!!
First of all don't be embarrassed- you have great taste in clothes!! I kept saying oh that's cute lol! Plus i love watching konmari closet videos and ive seen way worse 😉 .....i'm so dang proud of you!!!!! I could watch this all day lol. I think it's incredible that you've made this decision in your heart to get things organized etc and that you are truly doing something about it and that you are sharing tvhe journey with us!! Please don't be embarrassed or ashamed!!
Oh thank you so so much for your love & encouragement ♥️♥️♥️ That truly means the world to me, thank you!!!
I love your sense of humor as you go through these videos. It’s actually amazing how positive you keep yourself even when doing something that can be so difficult. It’s really inspiring, and I hope to mimic your positive attitude in my own life.
I just found your videos and I am watching them all! My mom is a hoarder ( dirty dishes/ unwashed floor, goat trails) and I learned to self sooth by buying things from her. I am also an artist and a crafter. When you talk about how much potential your art supplies have - I really felt seen. Mostly, I wanted to comment on this particular video because of how smart and self aware you are.. The way you clearly talk about why things have value to you really helps me understand myself (and my mom). And you are so kind and understanding to yourself - I love your self compassion. This last winter was so hard - the pandemic, depression, cPTSD and S.A.D. along with buying a house and moving really laid me low. I couldn't get to my art and craft supplies and I felt so terrible. I coped by buying ( and over buying). It's spring now and i feel so much better. I've cleared a path in my studio and I am looking at things with fresher eyes. I can see a lot of these things as the cost of surviving the winter. Watching you clear your space ( and your focus on what is important to you (your family, charity) has been the boost I need to let go of these items now that they no longer serve me. Many thanks!
I get that the sensory thing is important. I'm not particularly crafty, but I've made baby quilts and throw pillow covers using a patchwork style from old clothes I loved. The most popular and requested, haha, was a baby quilt I've done for several family members. It was 3 sections of clothesline with a sun and clouds, with little clothes cut from pieces like my grandfather's postal shirt, a skirt of my grandmother's, my parents bedroom sheets that hits my sis and I because we both made their bed all the time when my mom worked, old adorable baby clothes, etc. Also decorate them with the buttons, especially the ones you recognize.. You get the idea. And I'm 65 so you know I've got some really old stuff going waaaay back.I love you! Even though you are so the mom I dreaded seeing at 7am soccer games because you were dressed to the nines, hair, makeup all perfect. Bleh! I have a severe sleep disorder so I was the mom hunched over my coffee thermos in sweats, lucky if I brushed my hair. My victory was getting my kid there on time. 🤷♀️ keep it up, you've inspired me to really get at the crap I haven't dealt with in years and years.
I love how you talk about your feelings about the items because I feel the same way when I go through my things! I really like your channel, thanks!
Awe, thank you so so much ♥️🤗
I know exactly what you mean by owned items being connected with memory. I think there is even research showing that hoarders' memory is wired differently than non-hoarders' memory.
Being as it may, it feels as if I am giving myself Alzheimer's syndrome when I get rid of things, as the memory associated with these things will disappear along with them.
I’m SO proud of you!!! I know EXACTLY how hard this is and you are inspiring me. Keep going!
Thank you so much my friend 🙏🏻💗
November 2023. Yesterday, I took a pile of books and magazines to the library. Today, I have another bag of stuff for Goodwill. I own 5 long-sleeved tees, and 3
sweat shirts. I have 2 dressy pairs of slacks and 3 pairs of jeans. You've made lots of progress. Tina, Al's wife
Keep going! Decluttering is like a muscle. It only gets stronger if you keep persisting on using it. I have a room that I have to walk in every day, set a timer for 15 minutes and declutter. No music no distractions: just declutter. (I realize that it's not the KonMari method, but it's what's working for me.)
A book that really helped my way of thinking to help me let go of stuff (because I love love my stuff but my home was overflowing) was "Decluttering at the Speed of Life" by Dana K. White. In a nutshell, she talks about your home being a container and fitting everything in your container. I'm learning to be okay with the uncomfortable feelings that accompany each "loss" (it's scary!) because my goal (a simplified, clean home) has to outweigh my feelings.
What also helps is to follow the FlyLady. She has divided the house into different zones and each month you rotate through your zones. Eventually you have less and less, and your home is cleaner and cleaner. Your goals need to outweigh your feelings. You'll get there because you've already started! Big hug from sunny SC!
Oh thank you so much for sharing that with me!!! I’ll be sure to check out those books ♥️
I will look up the declutter in at the speed of life book, and Flylady was a good suggestion too.
Great suggestions💜
Funny thing I watch so many channels where people have whole bedrooms they turn into closets I bet if most of them did this it would resemble we just don't call them hoarders cause the stuff is neat just like extreme couponers have stockpiles it's all an obsession gone out of control a.k.a hoarding it's still a love for things imagine how disciplined they have to be to contain it all in one space
“if you have to think about it, the answer’s already no”. wishing you luck on your journey. thank you for sharing it!
Thank you!
The “sparks joy” method is not going to work for you because you’re finding joy in too many pieces of clothing. Instead, you need to ask yourself if you wear that item in the relevant season. If not worn , get rid of it. Try not to attach memories to clothing or you will never get rid of anything.
Sharon Ozvenom you are absolutely right. As a hoarder I overvalue, attach memories & stories or humanize the object. Once I can detach myself...this decluttering process will become so much easier ♥️
It's certainly a process, one I'm working on too. I think you're doing well to start and to share to help others.
@@ahoardersheart any clothes that have given you joy check to see if u have any photos wearing the item, if you have keep a photo album of all your lovely stuff. Then you will find it easier to let go KNOWING that u have the memory in your heart and also a photographic memory of when u wore that item. Then you have a picture story book of what you wore. Letting go will accelerate your acceptance of where u are now and help u focus on where you want to be xxx
@@ahoardersheart i was a hoar too, I found myself doing this process in phases, The first phase, I gave away 20 garbage bags...HUGE! I was so happy with living with open spaces that provided, it helped me to declutter and go for phase 2. Hope that helps!
You go lady! Keep up the Fantastic work. You will be free from clutter and anxiety soon enough.
So happy that you speak what's going on with your anxiety. I have hoarder tendencies, I grew up with a hoarder mother and can understand where you're coming from
Don't feel embarrassed... you acknowledged that you have more stuff that you need and you are trying to change it.... that is a huge step and you can be very proud of it :)
Think how you want your house and life to be after declutter. Keep that vision in mind while decluttering (you can create a mood board and have it on sight). When deciding what to keep ask your self does this item help me reaching my goal and vision? Would i buy this again?
And remember decluttering is a skill to learn! More you do it, easier it will be. And sorry about my english. Keep up good work!
Enni p thank you so much for all your advice & words of encouragement!!! These are definitely new questions I need to ask myself!! I’m grateful you shared that with me ♥️
What I go by is: if I have to store it or shove it in the back of the closet, I'm not using it and can't see it, so it's really not part of my life and it's got to go.
That’s a good way of looking at it!
I think a better question for you and me in the case of books would be 'does this help me have joy in my current chapter of life or am I hanging onto memories because I I don't or can't enjoy My life now?'
Kate dscribe ohhhhh...what a beautiful analogy with the books!!!! I absolutely love that and will write it in my journal ♥️♥️ Thank you for sharing that with me!!!
@@ahoardersheart you are welcome. Another way I found to help me decluttering is pretend the house is on fire. Literally take five minutes, get your clothes out and grab the ones you absolutely must have or make you happiest and carry them outside to safety. It reduces the opportunity to humanize or anthropomorphize belongings. Do that with each category and you'll see what really matters to you.
Seeing you go through this and your thoughts reflect mine looking at all of our stuff it is difficult to part with things it gives me so much anxiety, you inspire me to tackle our stuff
Thank you so much 🙏🏻♥️ I wholeheartedly believe you will be successful too 🌟🌟
In this old of white an grey you're such a colourful and Sparky person. I was looking for a organization video but couldn't get any motivation from the videos where all the clothes looked the same and were so few. I too have many clothes and most of them are as old as 20 years. Inspiring video. thank you !
Do your whole house!! I would love to follow along
Lol!!! I am!! I am trying every decluttering Challenge, game, Method to see what works best with my hoarding! I’d love if you could join me 🙏🏻😊♥️
Yeah me too
Me to
@@26alexther are you making videos I would love to watch
@@metamorphosisbyaprile7167 no I don't do videos,,I just love watching declutterring so I can get motivated..☺️☺️
I love that you're so honest about your process. I think most people judge hoarders by the show and most of us aren't like that. I appreciate your strength and it gives me strength on my own journey. Thank you!
“if you have to think about it, the answer’s already no”. wishing you lucky on your journey. thank you for sharing.
I am laughing with you as I'm exactly the same and like you said humanise my stuff and have strong attachments. It helps me so much more watching a fellow hoarder who has same struggles as I do rather than a professional organiser
Dear Lord in heaven! Help this dear one! Letting go isn't easy. I know exactly how you feel. I put stuff in a declutter bag because they were too small for me. The bags sat in a corner until the bags decomposed when I picked them up. I got the clothes out, looked at them, I had lost weight. I tried them on and kept them. I'm right there with you girl. I have boxes and boxes I have to go through. I don't even want to deal with it. I was thinking of getting racks and hanging them in my garage and going out and shopping my stash every morning like a store. But that is my veiled attempt to keep things I have not worn. As we grow older and transition, our lives change and we stop wearing certain clothing. I attach memories as well to my clothes. Man! its hard!
Thank you for sharing your story with me ♥️ We can do this together if you like! I know as a hoarder...I feel alone, like I’m the only person who does this. Or thinks like this. All of my friends are so “OCD clean.” I wanted this to be a channel we’re people can share their struggles together & we can be encouraging to each other ♥️♥️ Many Blessings 🌟
same here it is very hard! and the "did you wear it in a year" in my opinion also does not work as a question for a hoarder - or for me anyway - there are a lot of things I have not been able to do/enjoy BECAUSE of the hoarding and depression and specifically for clothes also because of weight fluctuations...I do get into my nice clothes again and wear them and I am not going to re-buy my clothes every time my weight changes...(which I am working on as well) so I can relate it is hard!! sending you both "clearing energy" 💕
Tfs your story I can imagine what you said when the clothes fit and congrats on the weight loss I know that can be hard
I found it helped me to let go of a lot of clothing (about 3/4 of my stuff) by changing my mind set. Instead of thinking of what the clothing represented of my past or perhaps that I might need it in the future, I looked at everything in the present. I asked myself "do I love it and am using it in my life now?" As I proceeded with my de-cluttering, it became easier. It was very liberating for me to let go of things I loved from the past. I never regretted anything that I let go and I am now working on other categories. Best wishes on your journey.
Just saw your most recent videos and came back here to tell you. Wow you’re doing so wonderfully!
First of all, you did such a great job so far! Also, I would love to watch you do a time lapse or something of going through every item! (I like long videos hahaha).
But some advice, since everything sparks joy, try to look at how often you use the item, how practical it is for your life going forward, if you saw it in a store now would you buy it again, etc.
And don’t feel bad about that bin you aren’t ready to let go of! I do the same thing. I go through my closet periodically and pull out things I’m definitely not wearing, but sometimes those items sit in a bag for a few months as I let them go one by one.
valley180 thank you so so much for your love & support ♥️♥️ I’m still learning how to edit on my iPhone & I will learn how to time-lapse...that’s a great idea!!!
And I love what you said...if I was at the store, would I still buy it. I have had that thought for more valuable items that I indecisive of selling or keeping. Example: we had a Pokémon card worth $300. I thought, “Would I buy it for $300 in the store?” The answer was no so we sold it. Now I didn’t think about doing it with all my things...just items with high monetary value. Thank you so much for that ♥️♥️♥️
I really love these videos, it's so awesome to hear your process and see your progress.
I can tell when you're not excited by an object, your tone of voice changes! That's been really helpful for me to notice in you, because now I can use that as a tool for myself. Thank you!
Oh wow, I didn’t even notice that! Thank you so much for sharing that with me 💜💗💜
I’ve never seen such an organised hoarder with a cute taste! Usually hoarders keep rubbish like giveaway shirts or pretty generic items or stuff they get on sale just because they’re cheap even if they’re not their style. I’m not a hoarder but would have a hard time parting ways with such nice clothes. Kudos to you for doing so 👍🏻
One of the things I've had to accept is that every little bit helps, even though I /want/ big quick dramatic changes. I've been deep-cleaning out my apartment over the last six months, and I wanted to be done by New Year's. It's now April and I still have a ways to go. 😅 But each time I give away even one small bag of clothes or an old coffee mug or whatever, that's one less thing in the pile. It /does/ add up over time. I've probably gotten rid of a third of the things I've owned (with a way still to go) and it's just been a little bit at a time, trying to keep a steady stream. Don't worry if you can't do it all at once. Any progress /is/ progress.
I know this is an old video but I had to comment. I have no idea how you did this! I can't contemplate doing this with my clothes. I'm having to do it gradually by wearing the same thing over and over until it's getting tatty. The only things I can get rid of easily is where I've made an obvious mistake buying it and it's the wrong size or doesn't work for my body. I'm in awe of you doing this massive declutter on your clothes all at once
Sometimes its easier, if you find it overwhelming, sort into sections, eg, do all your tshirts first etc. When I helped my hording parents do their clothes, it was easier for my dad to see just the 30 like items at once, and from that pick his favorites to keep, rather than seeing the hundreds of clothes to go through, and we managed to reduce probably more dramatically as each section was less overhelming.
Regarding your box of excess winter clothes, maybe set a date to revist it and if you havent needed to take anything from it, consider purging some more of it then. Sometimes we just need to give ourselves more time to realise we dont really want it in the long run and it IS OK to let it go ☺
Awe, thank you so so much for sharing that with me 🙏🏻💜 So very helpful!!
I am a hoarder from a long line of "collectors" and emotional folks. I'm very connected to my clothing.
In doing (trying) this process, I started with all my bottoms: skirts, pants, capris, shorts etc. Those are the least emotional. Then I did dresses, because those are a very clear feeling of joy to hone that "spark" finding.
Shirts and sweaters etc have been an ongoing process but I've gotten to: 1) "LOVE", 2)"hoarder brain loves"😊, 3) i need to "date" to assess if the (humanized) clothing and I are a good match, and 4) donations.
I'm requiring myself to go on one "date" with category three clothing a week. And that has ended up with about 70% not being my sole mate.
I totally feel you on this process and thank you for being so real 🙏
I once asked a woman if she needed 22 white blouses. She picked 6. Great progress. Tina
Baby steps are still moving forward. I'm excited for you to begin your journey, and it will take the time out takes. You go girl! You can do it! For my own experience, I've found that after going through all my clothes ~1 time a year for the last 2-3 years, things I held onto the first time, and even the second time, by the time I got to the third year I still hadn't used them or loved them, I felt free to release them. As I've moved forward, I've improved at letting things go earlier. Sending you high fives!
Feb.2023. When I get tired, I watch one of these old videos. I have a small closet, 1/2 full. Then, an overnight bag with summer clothes. I have a washer and dryer in
my condo, so I don't need many clothes. Tina, Al's wife
I appreciate you sharing all these emotional challenges that you are facing! You may want to read the Kon Mari book and watch her first series, so that you actually have a really solid understanding of what her process is. It may make it easier for you to apply! Because I can see from the first moment that you are fuzzy on what the whole thing is about, so it's not much helping you. But you did part with a bunch of pieces, so very proud of you for making space in your life (and basement) for more joy and less clutter!
if you are up to it, totally do your socks and undies too!! I JUST did it this week & it FEELS AMAZING!!!
You know what...I will !!!! But I’m not going to video all my spanxs to the world 🤣 But I do have A LOT I can get rid of!! Thank you!!!
'I feel a lot of embarrassment and anxiety, I feel overwhelmed' I GET YOU SO MUCH.
I have recently moved and even though I decluttered beforehand I saw in my new home it wasn't enough! My rules now are:
- if it doesn't fit properly, sell or donate.
- if it makes me look red in the face when I wear it without makeup, sell or donate.
- if it's holding on by its last thread, throw away.
- if I feel uncomfortable or ridiculous in it no matter what I wear with it, sell or donate. Just because I like it on other women doesn't mean I'll ever wear it. Even better if I can give it to friends, so I can still see the items, and they wear it so much better than me :)
I have a few scarves, belts and shoes left to do. Maybe some more dresses. Wish me luck!
Bravo to you for recognizing that hoarding is a problem for you! Bravo to you for tackling a problem that is so difficult for you! Bravo to you for exercising your decision-making skills! I think that getting down to 1 bin of winter clothes that you don’t wear is impressive! Though your clothes are sentimental for you, I think that you’re recognizing the value of this activity; not only are you gaining space, gaining control, putting importance on moving forward, but I think you’ll see that if you don’t “down-size” now, you’re going to need to keep repeating this time-consuming activity; which will take away from future enjoyment of time that you could be spending with your family or doing something that you enjoy. Good for you - great job!
i appreciate this being an actual hoarder video and not like a lot of the videos on youtube where people call themselves hoarders but are really just collectors with no emotional attachment to the items
❤️🙏🏻❤️ Yes, I wanted everyone to understand what a true person with hoarding disorder really thinks. Thank you for being so sweet and understanding 💞
I so can relate. I can remember so much of my life by looking at my cloths. but that's life. parting with them is the right thing to do. 🥀
You are right ❤️🙏🏻❤️ We can be strong together and know it’s okay to let it go 🌟
You are amazing! You plunged right in and kept right at it. You are sweet to let us in on it so we can learn from you and get energized from your successes.
Thank you for sharing your journey with us. I am about to go through this process myself and I am already feeling the anxiety and I haven't even started yet. Keep up the great work!
Thank you so much 🙏🏻♥️ I know you’ll do great in your KonMari too 🌟🌟🌟
It's all about the baby steps and doing what you are comfortable with. I love all your sparkles.
I would imagine a hoarder decluttering using this method would be tricky since everything seems to fall more into the sentimental category. You're doing good 🥰 definitely try reading the whole tidying up book tho, because you will become more emotionally aware of why things became like this and be guaranteed to not repeat because your eyes and heart are open to fully healing.
I am thrilled for you making so much progress! I have struggled with attaching to things as well, but I also get anxiety from clutter. Sometimes I just feel paralyzed when I am trying to do a declutter. But, progress is progress and it will inspire you in the future! Great job.
That is exactly how I feel inside too. I’m one Valium away from a Panic Attack when I declutter 😅. That why I laugh at myself or act silly. If I’m laughing, my anxiety stays calm.
And Thank you for your encouraging message ♥️ It really helps me in this journey 🌟
I think you did an awesome job ! It's hard to let go of things for some of us hoarders....Truely. I'm proud of you and you inspired me to go back and tackle and finish the exact same project in my own closet. I love unicorns and sparkly things too. Big Hugs to you! Keep posting because it's helping other people. Don't listen to the haters and negative people.
I love your channel so much I go back to old vids sometimes for motivation☺️ I hope you are able to choose what brings you joy, and let go of the attachments.
Clothes might tell a story of a certain time of your life, but YOU can tell that story. The wonderful person that YOU have become, speaks volume. You are a beautiful, loving and strong person now because of all your past. And so much awaits you in the future💕
Happy decluttering💕
Hard to know where to start. When I was moving, my lawyer boy suggested I separate out what I really wanted to keep. Then pack up the rest...and get a non-judgemental person to help. Easier to detach when you are not alone. Many people can identify. God bless you.
Awe, thank you so much my friend 🙏🏻♥️
My mom was a hoarder. You are dealing with your issues. When I worked in an office, I had three pairs of dressy slacks, maybe a half dozen shirts, etc. I made a
chart of all the combinations I could make. Tina
Try holding something you truely love and then try holding something you truely hate, that way you can recognize the feeling better.
Ohhhhh...what a great idea!!! Thank you!!
Thank you so much for doing this, for being you, for being real about how you process your thoughts ... I kept saying to myself you sound just like me!!!! I’ve been working through healing myself and understanding the issues surrounding hoarding for myself and my life. THANK YOU for sharing your journey! I want to give you a hug. We all need that ... 🥳🤗
Oh your message made me so so happy 💜🙏🏻💜 That’s why I created this channel!!! So people know they are not alone in this and together we can clean out our clutter & heal from hoarding!!!
I'm proud of you! You are killing it! I'm really proud of you for even posting this vulnerable side of you! I hope you know your helping others by posting this! Keep up the great work!!
Awe, your message made me so happy ♥️ Thank you so much 🙏🏻
I think you did really well! You were able to part with things that seemed to have been hard for you, and that's kinda the whole idea of the KonMari. We only want to keep things that truly fit into our lives that we want for ourselves.
Thank you so so much ♥️
You could always do what I do with my kids artwork- take a picture of it then put the pic in a photo album with a little thing when beside it of who did it what- it is the date etc etc. Instead of that you could journal about what that cute piece of clothing reminds you of etc and some memories... if you could just go thru and take the pictures.... then the things that you think you can part with because you will have a picture and the memories written down... you can go ahead ands donate the clothing and get excited for the memories that someone else will get to make with those clothes- then you can print the pics ..out stick them in a photo album or even just a notebook and theb write beside each one about what it reminds yout of and fun memories of what you did while wearing it etc..... when you are done with all the pics- and writing tnhe memories down etc.- you have a beautiful personal history/ journal that you can keep ands pass down to your kids one- day so they will have a whole journal of memories of your life! Plus fun pics- to go along with it! You can do this with any of the things you are getting rid of... the kids toys or little knick knacks .....that you don't really even look at anymore but you have a memory attached to it- so get the memory out of your brain and write it down and take a pic.... because if the items are just stored .....in the basement.... no one is getting joy out of it... ands certainly no one is getting to enjoy the memories that you are keeping in your heart!!! ...get those memories out of your heart and onti paper or even just start a free blog and keep it private ands when you take the pic you can just upload it to a blog post then you can write all about the season of your life and fun memories of yout wearing the outfit or what the knick knack reminds you of.... then just hit post and it's there forever .on your private blog. Would take you a few minutes or even if you want to gi in detail etc then do it in the evening before bed or something. Then after you hit publish take the item and donate it and while you are driving ti the donation place- think about all of the memories that someone else is going to get to have now with the item... aand think about the fact that maybe someone really really needed that item or had been looking everywhere for something like it and how excited they'll be. Also think about the fact that you will be blessing- someone and in return not only will you have the organized house of your dreams- ....but you will have an incredible journal of your life. If you do the quick free blog way ( which is what I suggest!!!) ...there are websites where they will print your blog like a book.... then you can get a couple copies of yiour super fun and unique journal ands have them forever and havr to pass down to yiour kids. I love to journal. I have my whole life and my mom even journaled for me from the day she found ir she was pregnabt with me until I turned 8 aand took over for myself. I have my whole life except for two bad years that i threw away when I was a teen.. ugh teenagers lol-...... anyway I have most of my life up until today documented in some way . It will be my legacy for my children. Im trying to slowly but surely get the journals typed up into a free private blog with pics etc so i can have it printed when i'm done for my children. ❤
Wow, thank you so much for taking the time to share that with me!! Such great ideas ♥️♥️♥️
@@ahoardersheart no problem!!! I hope it helps!! I would love a book like that lol. It gave me ideas of what I could use to do something like that for memories!! 💕
This is briljant! Totally remembering this
Such a beautiful moment that you were able to share. Truly amazing! Your honesty and communication was just so real. I loved it. Thank you!
Andi Jackson thank you so so much for your encouraging message ♥️ It really means the world to me!! I feel so vulnerable sharing all of this but when I read kind comments like yours...I know I’m doing the right thing!!
Awww, you're doing awesome. People need others to be open and vulnerable. We all learn from each other. I like to think of everybody as snowflakes. We are all differently beautiful in our own ways. No one snowflake is better than the other. I went through my own process of getting rid of many many things. I say I'm a hoarder in recovery. But at any minute, I could relapse! I just went to Goodwill today. Only took $8.... I spent all $8.
Andi Jackson I absolutely love your snowflake analogy ♥️ That it so beautiful & true and I’m going to write that in my journal!!!
I used to hold on to things, especially cloths and papers. I didn't really mind how messy things where around me. But about 3 years ago I broke down from depression, stress and anxiety(because of unrelated stuff) and after that I couldn't handel the mess I created anymore without going down the same spiral of stress and anxiety. I had to forced myself to get rid of stuff even if it was hard. And it has taken time. a lot of time. And I've gone though the same categories more than once. I'm still doing it. And I still collect things. But I feel a lot calmer now than what I did 3 years ago. Or even 1 year ago.
Congratulations on starting this journey. The fact that you recognize it is great. Just take baby steps to help keep your anxiety levels down. Like eating the Elephant, one bite at a time 😊
You are doing so good! Its ok to keep a few sentimental clothes! I struggle with clothes too. Between weight changes, style changes, and career changes I feel like I have 3 persons clothes! But I am working on it too! A simple trick I picked up that works well for hanging clothes is to hang up with the hanger backwards, and set a time limit, I go with a year because that covers all seasons and events. Whatever hasn't been worn you let go.
Laura Balzekas thank you so much for your encouragement & advice!! It really means a lot to me ♥️♥️♥️
I think you need to set a goal (ie 4 Rubbermaid bins- though I'd aim lower, personally lol) per season. So, say, a total of 8 bins, 4 per "wardrobe". Then when they get full, you'll truly find your favorites. I do this when I shop for clothing, I have a one in, one out rule. So if I buy those cute shoes, what am I going to go home and get rid of? I have half of a standard closet and one dresser (not counting my winter coats) and don't rotate my wardrobe out for each season. It fits or something has to go.
I don't know if any of that resonates with you, but I hope it's helpful. And hey, you may not be perfect but you're putting in the work. Keep it up!!!
I used to have about the same amount of clothes. I did the Konmari method and got rid of a lot of it because I wasn't wearing them. A lot of my clothes were truly ugly and hand me downs. I only regretted donating one of my shirts from high school and I got rid of it because the fabric is heavy and I live in the south, where it can be 80+ degrees at midnight. I gotta say that yours is the type of channel I've been looking for, for inspiration because I also humanize items and have issues letting go. I'm planning on trying a new system for the next month to see if it helps me.
This was the best declutter video I have watched today🤣JOY!!
Oh Joy!!!! This makes me so happy!!! Thank you for sharing that!!
I just discovered your channel, LOL, I'm not alone, in fact WAY more clothes than you. I totally relate to the overwhelm, the memories, the identity and all that attachment. We're currently on lockdown in New Zealand, so if one good thing is gonna come out of this covid pandemic, it's gotta be decluttering and culling the copious amount of clothes, shoes, and everything else I have acquired over my life. Thanks for the inspiration and motivation.
I love your clothes too! They’re so colorful and pretty. And I love how they remind you of your life story. I know this video is over 3 years old, and I don’t know where ups are in your journey today. I was thinking of what a joy it may be to write the stories down that go with the different items of clothing. That way you’re sharing your memories with others and those items of clothes could spark joy for those who love you, especially your children and other family members. Best of luck in your journey. Thank you for sharing your heart. ❤️