5 Things I Always Have on My Birth Plan ( From a mom pregnant with baby # 5)
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 11 ก.ย. 2024
- Printable Birth Plan from this video can be found here
hortonlane.com...
5 Things I Have On My Birth Plan Every Single Time.
I heard a suggestion to call your plan "birth
preferences." There is a lot of power in language.
Changing the world "Plan" to "Preferences" may help us let go of a bit of control if need be! As much as we want everything to go as planned, sometimes it doesn't, and the end goal is to make sure mom and baby are healthy!
I like to keep my birth plan simple because most of
the time, your nurses and doctors will walk you
through each step and give you your options.
Did you have a birth plan? If so, what was on yours?
#firsttimemom #pregnancytips #givingbirth #pregnancyhealth #pregnancy #momtobe
If you don’t want your son getting circumcised make sure you tell every single nurse, if they give your room a white board write down “NO CIRCUMCISION” and circle it a bunch of times! As nice as great as the staff was at the hospital where I gave birth, they just assumed that we would want to circumcise our son and it seemed like every couple of hours they would come into our room asking “OK is he ready to get his little procedure? The doctor is ready for him.” My husband and I ended up yelling NO!!!!!! Because we had been asked for the seventh time and we were so sick of being asked when we made it SO clear we didn’t want him being mutilated, and we were so scared he was going to get taken without our permission because they were so weirdly pushy about it.
Thats so weird! Why would they do that! I'm sorry you had to go through that. I hope everything is ok with your family and all of you are happy 💜
My friend kept telling them she didn’t want her son circumcised. They waited for her to fall asleep and came in to snatch him. Luckily, I was there and woke her up. I don’t understand why US doctors are so obsessed with mutilating baby genitalia. If I ever give birth, I don’t think I’d be comfortable going to a hospital after seeing that.
For my last two babies, each nurse shift change they would ask if the baby was to be circumcised. They weren't pushy though. We were at a baby friendly hospital so the procedure would be done in my room if we wanted it. It's becoming more common to not have babies circumcised at birth so nurses/doctors should be ready to hear no thanks.
Could I ask, why are you so against circumcision?
@@potatowarrior747 Could I ask, why are you FOR circumcision?
I remember going over my birth plan with my doctor for my first baby, and he was getting a little bothered because it sounded like I was really not going to let him take care of me (mine was long and super detailed). Finally, I said doc, I 100% trust you and your care of me and the baby. This birth plan is just how I would ideally like it to go and I'm hoping you'll help me make it happen. But, if there comes a point where you need to take over, I trust you to tell me that it's time for you to do so. He got it. That birth went amazing, even though I had to be induced. The only thing I remember him doing that I absolutely didn't want (and was just a habit for him) was counting while I was pushing. On my third push, I heard him start. In my brain I was screaming, "stop counting"! 😂 I started pushing harder, trying to make the contraction end so I could get him to stop counting. 🤣 I guess it worked - kid popped out! 💜 I wish he'd been there for the next birth, too. My favorite doctor ever.
Yeah I get why you didn’t want to be induced but my mom was induced with me for health reason mainly bc she was really small and could never gain much weight
(Also please don’t take this as hate I really hop it doesn’t come off like hate)
So basically if you needa get the baby out... Start counting
I feel like you don’t have a good grasp on how contractions actually work lmao
I love the idea of pushing harder out of spite making the birth go faster
@@JennifuhhGilardi I know exactly how they work, but when you're mid-contraction, what else are you going to do but push harder? 😂 In the end, it worked for both things - the contraction ended AND he quit counting! 😄😄😄
False information.
Episiotomy is a cut to the side to PREVENT a tear into the butt.
Not only to the side. There are about three types of cuts they can do. But they are less common and outdated now. Mainly used in emergency situations so she's right to say try and avoid them.
Exactly! Her other bad advice is delayed cord clamping. Early cord clamping prevents postpartum hemorrhage (massive bleeding) so she’s stupid
If you can, make sure you have a doctor that will only recommend a episiotomy, when it's absolutely necessary. The pain & recovery are worsen when you tear.
@@QueentDB that used to seem like the case with studies back in the day but more recent studies have now shown there doesn’t seem to be a difference! You might want to look into it if you haven’t heard about it, so you can see both sides.
I hoped someone would say this. Always prefer cuts. I teared both times, total rupture all the way. Recovery is open for interpretation.
As a midwife… you DO NOT need to birth on a bed. That practice was done to make that easier for the doctors. Not for your birthing. It makes things harder.
And episiotomies should not be done as routine. They are overused.
And the skin to skin, delayed cord clamping, vermix, and staying with baby are all great tips!
Yes thank you so many people don't even know about the APGAR that can be assessed on mama's chest & all of the beautiful benefits to skin to skin. I watched my strong little nephew latch on within 30 minutes of being born. It was the most beautiful & natural thing I had ever witnessed 🥹
why leave the vermix on??
@@kittycay2145 vermix is basically nature’s barrier cream. It keeps baby’s skin from getting all wrinkled and fragile in the womb. And once baby is out it keeps there skin protected from all the new wonders of the world, like bacteria, viruses, pollutants, foreign products, and from drying out.
Why clean off the natural product and then replace it with artificial lotions? I know it looks a bit yukky, but it’s fine. Plus it’s kinda thick, you can clean off the blood and other gunk without cleaning off all the vermix
@@kittycay2145it helps protect the baby from infections and contracting pathogens
@@nikeykaur8105 cool! thanks
GOOD JOB MOMMA!!! I didn't get any of this. As a result I've got PTSD from my son's birth. Unlike you, I no longer give Drs the benefit of the doubt. The have always treated me as an inconvience and tried to get me in and out with the highest bills possible. I even had my insurance double charged for a test I denied (hearing test because my midwife had already performed it). Hospitals are not your friends. I don't think doctors are particularly bad... but the administrators have influence over the care you and your baby are provided. Postpartum depression is a big effing deal, so make sure you get the birth you want, no matter what. Love the content! Xoxo
All great advice! I just had my third baby one month ago. Each time they automatically put them right on my chest. Skin to skin immediately, messy and all. That's perfect for breastfeeding within the first hour. They delayed clamping until the cord stopped pulsing. That's as long as I wanted but you can request longer. Baby gets first bath after 24 hours to keep the vernix. That was my hospital's guideline. My baby's were born late so they barely had any left. Only a tiny amount in their creases. After 40 weeks, it starts to dissolve away in the womb. But yes, don't wash it off right away since it's helpful for the baby.
Baby friendly hospitals keep baby in the room with parent for everything. I think all hospitals should update to this! We also had a musical charm on me and one on the baby's ankle. If the music didn't chime that meant the baby wasn't with the right parent. Also if the charm got close to the elevator, the elevator would lock so no one could escape with a baby. Great little safety feature!
Definitely ask about delivering in different positions! Labor at home if you can but don't be confined to the bed if you labor at the hospital.
My doctors said it is now believed to be safer and healthier to allow women to tear naturally if they're going to tear instead of getting the episiotomy. That made me nervous but I did prefer the recovery of not having the episiotomy for my last two births. I wasn't cut all the way to my bum though lol.
Epidural was not worth it for me. I had one for my first and did drug free for my last two.
Another good thing to add to birth plan is your stance on a catheter, C-sections, and birthing tools being used to help a stuck baby.
I didn't know about the anklets with my last unexpectedly-hospital birth. We left as soon as possible after delivery and they had forgotten to clip baby's tracking anklet. There we were at the door with security coming towards us to find the stolen baby. 😅 They were super nice though. I guess it was pretty obvious I was mom and had just delivered. 🤪 The nurses station was so appologetic.
@@donotneedtoknow7541 lol that's so funny! At my hospital, you are escorted to the elevator and the nurse cuts them off as you pass the nurses station. It's like you are never alone just in case I wanted to snag an extra baby or something on my way out.😂
@@adriennemcmillan9637 "snag an extra baby..."🤣🤣🤣
May I ask the benefits of the vernix staying on the baby?
@@perfectlyimperfect2368 it has antioxidant and antibacterial properties. It's their natural lubricant for the trip down the birth canal. It's a moisturizer that keeps them from drying out. It helps them regulate their body temp too.
They don't cut you to your butthole with an episiotomy!! 🤦🏼♀️ Seriously if you're going to make statements like this make sure you do your research before you tell a pregnant teen or first time parent coming across your video something like this. They could trust you because you have had 4 children. If you are about to tear you want that episiotomy! Let me tell you why, if you tear it's more likely to be way worse than the episiotomy, it can take longer for that tear to heal and it is also harder to sew up. If your doctor is sure you're going to tear doing an episiotomy can not only prevent you from having a nasty tear, in some cases giving you that bit of room can prevent tearing all the way to your asshole, a episiotomy will likely heal faster and it is easier to sew back together. Everything else you said in this video was spot on though.
I knowww right. This posted me so much 🙄
Episiotomy is given especially to prevent tear from vagina to butthole -.-
Tears can be that bad, and epiostomies can tear from where mom is cut. Epiostomies are no longer recommend practice. Studies have shown it's better to let mom tear naturally. Epiostomies may be used for shoulder dystocia, forceps delivery, or other cases in which the doctor needs to get in there. Again, epiostomies are not recommended for getting baby out. If a doctor wants to do one, he's out of date.
JEEEZUZ..... stop worrying abt everyone's damn feelings... Who cares if a PREGNANT TEEN is scared.... she shld be... She shouldn't even be pregnant... Keep the damn legs closed...
@@martinemikita9281 also dudes can keep it in there pants but yeah blame it all on the woman makes sense 🙄
Women tear naturally a episiotomy is to stop the tear from going into the back passage , so should only be done when there is risk of that ( instrumental delivery, or you are tearing that way ) or if baby is distressed and needs a quick exit
Those were my main points too!
I added that if possible, let Dad cut the cord, because he wanted to be able to do that. 😀
We had some hiccups with some of ours. With my second child, she was born around midnight, I'd been up all day, and then she decided she wanted to nurse immediately and just not stop. I was EXHAUSTED. A nurse came to check on me and asked how I was doing and I broke down sobbing about how tired I was. My husband was asleep and I didn't want to wake him, so she asked if I wanted her to take baby to the nurse's station and she'd bring her back when it was time to nurse.
I agreed, and it was the best 2 hours of sleep I ever had!!! I felt comfortable with it because it was a little hospital without a nursery. The nurses all ooohed and aaahed over her while I slept. I am glad I asked.
When my mom had my brother over 30 years ago it was always customary the baby stay in the nursery vs now where it's all about staying in the room. Anyway he was the only one in the nursery,small hospital,so the nurses never took him there but instead just always held him at the nurses station. So my mom different times would see them working with him just chillin in their arms. Lol where with me they all had to keep coming in so they could "meet the mom of the fattest baby in the nursery." Excuse you the fat baby has feelings! 😂
My birthing plan was literally the opposite on each point. Lol I was induced with each of mine, I took an epidural asap, I wanted babies separated from my body quickly and cleaned. Everyone's birthing plan is different but I bet we all love our babies the same. ❤️
You are my biggest inspiration as I tread these waters of first time motherhood (delivering in June 2023). I totally agree with everything you have said. I watched my nephew go chest to chest it was the most natural thing I ever saw. He was so calm on mama's warm chest & latched on withing 30 minutes of being born. It was then I knew chest to chest was in my future birth plan.
Never got skin to skin because of either early babys that needed to be checked if they could actually breathe on there own or some other crazy problem I got to kinda touch one before wisked away. Makes me sad but I also knew it was necessary for there health 3 out of 5 nicu babys
Nope, babies can be checked on mom, if even just for a moment.
@@hrw1936 not really if there very premature like 33 to 24 weeks like mine were and with one being a stat csection with something going on with baby that needed to be checked promptly and they can access a baby that is in distress a lot better on the cot than on mom
@@evawall9156 C-sections present thier own loss of control problems for mom. I'm glad your babies made it, however they were born.
@@hrw1936 yes the csection presented a whole different perspective but it really saved my babys life so im grateful to that . And my 24 weekers did not make it the odds were stacked against them not only because of there prematurity but also others things. I would love to have a delivery with skin to skin immediately but I aslo know if I were to have another baby that probably would not happen due to prematurity again. My 33 weeker is doing awesome though which at 33 weeks they typically do awesome, she just had a rather hectic rough start i had 2 rounds of steriod shots and yet she still ended up needing the ventilator.
@@evawall9156 I'm sorry to hear about the troubles you had. Xxx you're doing awesome
A hospital's number one goal is to not get sued. Everything they do is not what's best for women or children or humanity, but what is best for their bottom line. American hospitals are profit centers first. Keep that in mind. Love the channel
The only times I had hospital births my “plan” literally said “Please leave me alone until I call for you. I will wear the belly monitor, but that is the only “standard of care” I will accept unless I specifically ask for your help.”
One nurse said, “Why don’t you try homebirth if you get pregnant again.”
Excellent advice and I’ve done that ever since.
Hahaha I love it 😂
Yasssssss girl!!! Had the same birthing plan with all four of mine! Especially that the baby does not leave my sight, if they do..dad is there.
Chrissy I love you I swear you could deliver a baby by now lol!!!!!I love how you keep it positive but REAL!!!!I totally agree about keeping the baby with me noooo one takes baby without me or daddy present!!!👍👍Thank u momma,BTW HES ABSOLUTELY BEAUTIFUL!!!!!!
I wanted skin to skin & delayed cord clamping so badly, but my baby wasn't breathing when she came out. 😢 Dad went with her to the NICU where they worked to stabilize her for 15 terrifying minutes. I think he has some ptsd from that experience to be honest. I can't imagine watching that & i wasn't aware of any of that until i was out of recovery & back in our room. Apparently, there are tiny vessels in babies lungs that break away once the baby comes out & take a deep breath, unfortunately my daughters didn't for whatever reason & they had to have 2-3 Drs & a few nurses working on stabilizing her. They were close to transferring her by air over to the closest children's hospital. Beyond grateful for those Dr's saving her life. She's a healthy 1 y/o now ❤
I'm not too comfortable having any relatives in the hospital with me aside from baby Daddy but I'll tell you what I will certainly have my dad there since hes been a nurse for 34 years if nothing else to make sure I don't get pushed around.
Yes to the birthing ball! (And to everything else, but especially that one!)
I just had baby 3 and they were going to start me on pitocin but I refused and instead bounced on a birthing ball and within an hour, was having strong regular contractions and had the baby about 3 hours after refusing pitocin.
I also refused all pain medication. I just feel like things move faster that way. Wanting it to end is GREAT motivation to push. 😂
I had the same things in my plans. Except with my first 12yrs ago, he was out of the room a lot..I was very young and wasnt speaking up like I should have. But I did enjoy the rest when the nurses took him to the nursery lol
I just wanted to say that they don't cut all the way to the other passage, it's just a little cut and they usually only do it if necessary. The reason they make a little cut is usually because the baby's head might tear you down there and sometimes that tear can go from one passage all the way to the other. The other reason they make a little cut is so that you don't end up torn from front to back.
That’s why they say they do them but it isn’t back by research. That’s a very outdated reason as now it’s been shown they actually make tearing worse and they don’t heal any better than natural tears.
“I don’t care if baby is dying -right on my chest immediately”
The first one gave me this vibe.
You and only you.. because no one else got that vibe
@@lmt6672 It's true though. There are many instances where the newborn needs immediate medical care.
@@neonice notice she didn't say that. Babies are born with blood, sometimes poop (merconium) and some moms would prefer baby to get cleaned up a little first thing. Also, the medical team will still be there checking baby's condition, there's just no good reason to do that away from mom's chest most of the time.
@@donotneedtoknow7541 Checking baby's health on someone's chest is atleast very slow and inefficient. So ye.. especially if the baby needs help, definitely the last place to be
@@lmt6672 I got the vibe also, so.. stop speaking for me
Yes! I agree with these. ☺️👍
The Touch, the monitoring by Mom or Dad (or trusted Family member or Friend), and the Vernix (white stuff) on belly of baby because it helps the baby's digestive system.
Also, I learned that a great uncle of mine had a mental disability because the doctor used forceps to pull him out instead of using the forceps to widen the birth canal opening.
I was screaming begging for the clip because it hurt so bad, ring of fire like crazy.. they said "no shes almost out!" 🤣 I'm glad they didn't cut me because I didn't need any stitches..whew! These are great birth advices 😊
Haha such cute baby 😍 I've been giving birth 6 times and in Sweden all the things you counted they do here i don't need to tell them that 🥰
U r so lucky
This was my birth plan and I had an amazing homebirth
- No cervical exams or touching me qothout my consent
- No touching baby without my consent (caught baby myself)
- No episiotomy
- No perineal exam (did it myself)
- No epidural
- No drugs apart from gas and air
- Delayed Newborn Checks
- Baby stays with me- immediate skin to skin for the first 24 hours,
- Delay Cord Clamping
- Leave Vernix on
- No birthing on my back
- No Injection for Placenta
- No Coached Pushing (Just trusted my body)
- No breaking waters
I had the best birth I could have ever imagined. It was amazing ❤
Just trusted my body
It's gotta be nice to trust doctors during delivery of a new born....sadly not all of us are able to do so since we all aren't listened to equally when we ask for what we need from our birthing plan list that we painstakingly made...
I hear you. I got a Doula to help be my medical advocate because my friend has had to be her own when doctors were pushing for c-sections she didn't need. She had a v-back baby 3 & natural up to baby 8. Imagine how many times they tried to tell her she HAD to get a c-section because of baby 2.
Well this was my contraception for the day, thank you for that.
All of this! Yes! Especially the immediate skin to skin and dad has to be with baby if baby has to be taken out of the room!
We had to give up the freedom of movement and delayed cord clamping in my case cuz there was meconium in the fluid when my water broke, so there had to be constant heart rate monitoring during labor. Also meant he only had a few seconds skin to skin on my torso before they cut the cord and cleaned off his skin and suctioned out nose and mouth to make sure he hadn't swallowed it or breathed it in.
But in the end, healthy baby and healthy mama, and that's the most important thing!
Sometimes stuff just happens which makes certain procedures necessary for the health of the parent and the child. My mum has five kids, her first four kids were all natural births but then there were complications with my youngest brother that meant it would be safer for my mum to be induced. My mum then needed an epidural. No shame for wanting or getting any of these procedures, just do what you think is best.
I have had two kids and two birth plans where none of them happened the way I wanted because of emergency reasons. You can have a plan but you have to be flexible so you don't get disappointed or depressed when the birth doesn't go the way you planned it.
Plan A for ideal situation.
Plan B and possible plan C in case things go pear-shaped.
I had an episiotomy and it wasn't that bad. I was crowning for a long time and was on the verge of tearing. Honestly pushing is so exhausting and painful that you don't even feel the cut, and there is so much relief when the baby can finally come out. They also don't cut from your vagina staight down they usually just make a small cut off to the side. If you're pregnant just ask your doctor about it and they usually explain the reason for doing something like this.
Getting an episiotomy is nothing to be ashamed of or worried about many women opt to get this as a doctor can cut a straight clean line rather than the skin getting torn. the straight clean line makes it a lot easier to heal
What is the deal with not tying the cord off immediately? This is the first time I've ever heard anything about the cord not being tied off immediately. Everything else I completely agree with and understand.
Delayed clamping has become more popular in recent years. The placenta is still sending lots of goods to the baby after birth but not for long. It is often thought that as long as the cord is pulsing, the baby is still getting positive nutrients from it. Then you can clamp and clip it after the pulsing stops. It can be a few seconds after delivery to few mins. A more controversial view is that the cord shouldn't be cut off at all and should be allowed to dry and fall off naturally over a few days which is called a lotus birth. But unfortunately keeping it that long isn't safe and babies have died from infections. The placenta is an organ that dies after it's birthed. So if left connected as it dies and dries, harmful bacteria can grow and be passed to the baby. Not every time ends tragically, but often enough that those who back science speak out against it. But there are no risk in delayed clamping that I've read, only with the lotus birth.
It seems the slight delayed cord clamping and cutting, like when the pulsing stops, has been a thing in the UK for ages... but interesting that it's becoming more popular in the US currently.
I wish there had been a little explanation on the delaying cord clamping thing. I'm curious now why delay.
Baby gets more iron-rich blood if you let the cord stop pulsating and turn white before cutting.
I did everything exactly the same, except I said from the start that I didn't want an epidural. Giving birth is a natural process, so I didn't want to have any epidural or pain medication involved when it wasn't necessary! Sure, the pain is uncomfortable, but it's normal and natural and we women are made for it, we can do it. Also, giving birth is a wonderful experience, which is why I think you should experience it with everything that goes with it. The birth of my son was really painful, but I never felt so strong and powerful in my entire life as in labor and delivery, it was a wonderful experience and I would never do anything different! ❤️
I got an episiotomy in a bit of an emergency situation and glad I did as it stopped me tearing. It is NOT to your butt hole. It’s not that long a cut. I healed up super quick but my pal who gave birth a month later got a 2nd/ 3rd degree tear and took over a month to heal.
Thank you so much! I’m due in 4 days and this was great knowledge
Congratulations!! I’m due in August! 💙
That’s not how an episiotomy is done….🙄
I didn’t know it was a choice till she said it was. My doctor did the episiotomy without me knowing, I only pushed for 5 minutes and most of the time the staff was telling me to stop and breathe there was no rush, my daughter was naturally small. That’s where me doctor cut, not all the way to my bum hole but pretty close. I feel violated now knowing it’s not as normal as people made it seem. I highly doubt I would’ve torn, and would’ve loved to have a choice.
@@izzyvicente-bradley2311 I am so sorry you were assaulted during such an incredibly important moment in your life! Cutting someone without consent is assault no matter who is doing it.
I had to switch doctors in my last week but most hospitals will ask you about all these things. Even though it was my first and I tried to educate myself as much as possible, there were new things that came up, but they explain everything if you just ask what the purpose of something is. Even with some of the more pushy staff, stuck to your gut and you can always ask someone else since like 25 people will be in and out during the process.
What if you were about to tear really badly? It was my understanding the Docs Midwife’s making a cut was better than you tearing badly? I was cut before needing a forceps assisted birth
Great advice on my fourth baby boy. An talk about Circumcision if it’s something you don’t want because they always assume everyone wants it.
I agree with all of this and my baby’s never leave the room either, I did have my last during covid so they did come to the room for everything. This momma not letting no baby swooping happen neither
*me who’s not planning on having kids ever, doesn’t have a partner, and isn’t even the age of consent watching this*
I had my first two babies natural and wanted to do the same with my 3rd, but had to be induced to ensure my husband would not miss the birth and would not miss his grandfather’s funeral. I told them I wanted to go natural, but after hearing about pitocin o was open to an epidural if needed. I will never in my life forget how awful the nurse acted towards me when I asked for an epidural. My husband excused himself into the hall and gave the nurse of piece of his mind and requested a new nurse. I didn’t find out about any of that until weeks later.
I was the only girl in the hospital the day I was born for about half a day and my mom was convinced the nurses would kidnapp me so she made my dad follow them everywhere
Definitely used the epidural each of my 3 times 😂❤️
Did you feel like it delayed labor?
They must love her on that unit
😂😂
Wow cause she want what's best for baby? Sorry it's such an inconvenience fir you! Also nurses usually don't mind!
They love to help mom and baby to have the best experience possible!
I was a labor and delivery nurse and we really appreciated it if the mom had a birthing plan, so we could do everything possible that mom had a positive experience, because it also helps the baby if mom feels safe and happy!
@@buddyandme0511 yep!! Also you're awesome!
Interesting comment from a man. Your mother must love hear your takes on how women should approach pregnancy and birth!
My entire birth plan went out the window when I had to get an emergency c-section with my first child. This was 2 months ago 😂
Skin to skin is so helpful for bonding with baby. Do it immediately and it is easy to feel love.
Luckily all of these are standard practice at the hospital I gave birth at. We even requested that I wanted my placenta and no one batted an eye.
What did you want placenta for if you dont mind?
I found your channel about a week or so ago, I want to thank you for teaching me so much in that small amount of time. I had so many questions, but could never ask my family or they'd accuse me of being a slut..
In any case, it's important to mention that there's different circumstances for different mothers, depending on their bodies and the baby too. Some may need one procedure more than the other, while another needs no help at all.
Ok mom of 5 first one had the cut cause apparently I wasn't pushing good enough and needed suction, this was 26 yrs ago, all 5 were 3 weeks early, still got the skin to skin right after awesome, epidural with first none with second and epidural with the rest cause it's amazing!!! Birthing hour for all 20, 24, 15, 10, 3...my last baby was my favorite labor and my only girl!
To prevent the baby swap thing they are supposed to put matching bands on you, baby (in 2 places minimum usually a wrist and ankle just Incase one falls off there is a second in place as proof until it can be replaced) and one other person you choose (usually dad if there) before the baby is allowed to leave the room and it checked every time the baby is taken anywhere at all to verify the numbers match and it cannot be removed until the baby and mother are both discharged and off property. I found out about this when my youngest was discharged because I asked if they could go ahead and take off the band and they weren't allowed to and that we had to remove it once home or at least on the way home
OK I totally agree with all of that but with my youngest son I had to have an emergency c section amd he had to be rushed to the NICU sooo as good as all that sounds sometimes it doesn't work out that way and that's is ok you still have a wonderful bond with your baby even if you don't get to have skin right away and even if baby isnt in the same room as you because he is in the very capable hands of the NICU staff. My milk still came in amd we still got to bond just in a little different way. Don't feel shame or any less if your "birth plan" doesn't go how you thought it would. You are still a strong and amazing mother with a beautiful new baby.
Sometimes, yes, our bodies or the universe throw unexpected wrenches into this process. Have hugs. That must have been so terrifying. I hope he's doing all right and didn't need nicu care for too long.
It was too late for me to get an epidural. In a way I was ok not having it. Never got a chance to choose again, my husband was diagnosed with cancer when our son was 3(we were ready to try for baby #2), did not ever happen, he passed away a year and 5 days later at 43 years young.
Hey, 12 year old here, genuine question! What is skin to skin contact for? Why is it so important? Is it a “I’ve been waiting so long, give me the child N O W,” thing?
I’m not sure why immediate matters, but you’re probably right. However, I do know that consistent skin to skin contact with a baby is actually one of the things that helps their minds and emotions to work.
@@koolcatvalley oh. Ok. Thank you
@@fixingeverybodysgrammarigu4196 No problem! :>
Helps to keep baby warm, calms them, and helps them regulate their heart rate :)
Inside of mom is all baby has known. Skin-to-skin gets him familiar with her scent and helps with early bonding and attachment particularly when it comes to establishing breastfeeding. All this coupled with the above comment concerning regulating vitals in both mom and baby. Hope this helps.
I couldn't do skin to skin right after my youngest was born. She came so fast. The cord tried to be a bungee cord except it was wrapped around her neck. So it got tight. Then her little lungs didn't want to stay inflated, they kept flattening. I was so scared.
They did not give me an apeseiotamy I tore almost to my but hole and had over a hundred stitches
That's what the procedure is trying to prevent. Sadly this women decided to give uneducated false information out like it was fact. I'm sorry this happened to you I can't even imagine.
@@Eve0127 I don't think doctors do it anymore it was never offered as an option.
@@gizzyg5337 They do, I think it’s just not as common as it used to be.
@@kass_G59 wish they would have offered it to me healing took forever
@@gizzyg5337 Oh I’m sure!
Do you have to pay for skin to skin in america?
Also my midwive recommended not cutting the ambilical cord straight away so baby get all the nutrients from it ♥ so we stayed connected during our skin to skin 😊
The cost is not different for the US, you just need to be clear with your wishes. Some moms get a little queasy with all the things on a newborn and might be better off if the kiddo is cleaned up a little before the initial skin to skin. I am not a queasy person but I have seen people faint at the slightest blood or medical procedure so I cld see that being an issue for some.
@@PurdueAlum01 Well thats good i heard a rumor that it cost extra to have skin to skin on top of the cost of birth (the fact you have to pay for the birth and hospital stay seems ridiculous to me, but different countries have different schemes)
@@insertnamehere2289 oh.... thats just ridiculous 🙄 im sorry that happened to you 😔
💯...It doesn't always go as planned.
Hi there! You have such a great content! I'm feeling lucky just because I have found your channel ~
Thank you for your job
With love from Russia ❤️
Same sis! Had the same for each three of my babies 💜
gorl i don’t think you understand the point of an episiotomy
But if your birth plan doesn’t happen it’s okay too. I was messed up emotionally for over a year because my birth with my son went NOTHING to plan. I was preclamptic, he was in distress, I had to have an emergency c section. When they took him out of me I wasn’t allowed to do skin to skin cause he needed immediate oxygen. Good for this woman she was able to control her births, some of us don’t get this luxury, and if you’re one of these women like me it’s okay. You’ll still bond with your baby. 🥺❤️
that’s so valid about not letting baby leave without dad present
DO NOT ASK THEM NOT TO DO AN EPISIOTOMY! its to prevent the tear into the butt, as someone who had one and still tore really badly with my 10lbs baby the cut hurt less, healed faster, and was easier for them to stitch up than the tears i suffered.
Always take the clean cut over potential tearing, it is not pretty!
Episiotomies make severe tears more likely unfortunately. They didn’t always know that but now more research has been done. If you don’t want a bad tear, DON’T do the episiotomy.
Though more risk doesn’t mean a for sure outcome, glad yours went well!
That baby looks so comfortable!
If you're going to get an epidural there's no sense in waiting that's ridiculous. Imagine waiting until it's too late 😆 it happens all the time keep that in mind.
I mean she’s given birth 4 times I think she knows what she’s doing
@@abigailfitzgerald714 I given birth 5xs that's the most ridiculous thing I ever heard 🤣🤣🤣
I was told I could get an epidural between 5 and 7cm.... I took it as soon as I hit 5cm! Lol
All I'm saying is what's the point of enduring the pain if you're going to get the epidural anyway that's just stupid. If you can't handle the pain of child birth there are options that your mom or grandmother didn't have n if you decide to get an epidural that doesn't make you less of a woman. Why wait? To say you tried? Who cares 😂 I had a natural birth n there are plenty of others that have too woopty doo. With that said I've also had an epidural n laugh at every woman that says they're going to try to have an all natural birth that end up getting an epidural. It's pointless not to get one unless you're really scared of the possible side effects but in that case you're not going to get 1 if you care that much right?
@@abigailfitzgerald714sure, but people will watch this and follow her advice
FYI, if you have a c-section make sure your partner is there to do skin to skin. ❤️ I wanted to have a natural birth so bad, but my kiddo broke my water and then ZERO contractions happened. Almost 24 hrs later, with pitocen, still no contractions. So to the operating room I went.
I asked for help with breastfeeding..i will admit i was physically exhausted.. they took my baby to the nursery. I fell asleep right away but i was distraught when i woke up and my baby wasnt there...i just needed help..i didnt want them to take my baby. That would be something i made very clear in hindsight
Thank you for sharing!
Skin to skin is a must for me and yes I want baby in mine or my husband's sight at all times (irrational fear they will get switched, might not be so irrational) you've carried that baby the whole time just tearing it away right after is traumatic. That bonding while those hormones are released is vital for baby and parents.
I had a c section with twins I had no skin to skin until hours after they were born.
Me who had my baby at 26 weeks gestation, didn't have time for the meds at all, and he was immediately taken out of the room and I couldn't hold him at all for days....
My mom has had 6 kids, two are new Borns one was born 2020 another was born 2018, next was 2014 and me (the oldest) 2012 :)
YASSS my babies STAYED WITH ME in the room too!
I knew he was going to fall asleep that was adorable!!!
🥰 what a cute mommy/son duo
Can’t do some of these if u have a c section or if baby is sick
I had a birth plan, and a back up one, both didn't go to plan, just because yours went to plan, does not mean everyone else's does, I was supposed to be induced as I went over my due date but it was too close to Christmas, ended up in natural labour the day my inducement was supposed to be planned, a day into my 3 day labour, everything stopped, I was woken up in the middle of the night by a nurse who broke my waters to induce me (btw it wasn't 1 big gush, it kept coming over the course of a few hours) that shocked me a little. When it came to push time, due to previous injury to my left hip, I couldn't get my left leg into position and had to go into theater where they took out my epidural, numbed me from the waist down, I had an episiotomy (which isn't an incision from your vagina to your buthole, but is actually and i quote "Episiotomy, also known as perineotomy, is a surgical incision of the perineum and the posterior vaginal wall generally done by a midwife or obstetrician. Episiotomy is usually performed during second stage of labor to quickly enlarge the opening for the baby to pass through". Despite the episiotomy I still tore twice, needed 16 stitches which took what felt like forever for the woman to complete, but she said she wanted it neat and tidy, which I'll be forever grateful for. Trying to go to the toilet for the 1st time, especially number 2, was agonising, I was still half frozen in my legs when the nurses escorted me to the shower, left me and told me I was on my own, I had to make my own way back, to find my daughter awake and crying, I fell over on my way to her and couldn't get up, phoned her dad who had gone to drop off his family, and i was in tears asking him to come back and help me, maybe it's different in the US 🤷♀️ but my point still stands, everyone's experience is different, you could have several birth plans, and each one may be thrown out the window when the time comes, whilst it's good to have a plan, always expect the unexpected. Always.
I do all except for leaving the vernix on and delayed cutting I tried to get the epidural but my babies come too fast never any time for it and the inducing thing I don't know I have a superstition about it every time the doctor sets an induction date I have the baby the day before or I go into labor naturally the same day it is insane I don't know how I do that but it always ends up happening so when they say they want to induce I go ahead and do it because for some reason it just kind of jinxes things to do its natural thing but I end up having my babies completely 100% naturally no cutting none of that
My water broke but labor didn't start so they had to induce me. My plan went out the window but I was able to laugh about it because the most important thing to me was alive mom and alive baby. Long live epidurals!
why do you try to avoid epidural? just curious :)
Lady we need you lol keep spilling that tea ☕
All my exact requests too!!
After 4 babies you still don't know what an episiotomy is, but you're telling people not to get one? It is to AVOID you tearing from back to front. The incision is made towards the sides so that you do not just shear. An episiotomy is a controlled cut that is much easier to stitch and keep clean. If you tear then there's no guarantee that it will be a clean tear, and depending on the location it is more susceptible to infection.
4x as well. Last time, I got to pull him out from the armpits and brought him straight to my chest. GREAT staff, let me keep him there for like 30 minutes or so before the cleaned him and I needed a minute 😂 Go mama!!!!
Great advice
The baby leaving the room thing is so important for me. I absolutely will not have any baby swapping, so hopefully he can wear some type of thing with his name on it. Or the nurses will just be extra careful
I Don't understand, why delayed clamping of the cord??! Doesn't that make baby more vulnerable?
When I had my first in 1973 I was so naive no epidermal no pain meds not induced. . I demanded the baby put on me. Immediately but freaked tout seeing the white stuff and blood,started crying because I thought there was something wrong to keep him in the room with me all the time but I won! I also gwi up and walked around(18hrs in hard labor on essentially a cot in the labor room)nurses didn’t like it but too bad! I also insisted on nursing!
i wasn’t breathing for a very small amount of time after coming out. i’m glad my mom didn’t ask to hold me right away cause she’s a nurse and knew if i didn’t start breathing i could have issues, or something like that. but i was fine and mom got to hold me second. my dad stole me first lol
No one is putting their baby’s life at risk just for skin to skin 🙄 I really thought it would go without saying but if baby is in distress of any kind OF COURSE tend to the baby in the most suitable way. This was all in reference to a healthy uncomplicated birth. The whole point of saying this was to share that the bodily fluids didn’t bother me. The nurses check baby’s vitals while on mom’s chest and they are the ones that encourage skin to skin immediately
My mom made my dad follow the nurses with my siblings & I too lol
Every birth plan for every one of my kids NEVER went the way I wanted it! But my kids are healthy and happy, so I'm OK with that!
Maybe I'm old fashioned but aren't all of it normal in a birthing room?
30 year NICU RN - you got it almost all right!!! Perfect. Smart mommy! (Just review episiotomy)
If it wasn't for my episiotomy, i would've needed a c section which i didn't want. I'm ok with my small sutures 👌
How did your babies still have vernix on when they're delivered after the due date?