Only once did I cold approach a woman I had never seen before. She was walking by carrying an orange that was larger than a large grapefruit. I said “wow.” And when she looked, I said “that’s a big orange.” We ended up together for two years. So maybe watch for interesting fruit.
Just say hello, how are you. Or say hello, do you mind if we talk/I join you? Don't try pick up lines, don't comment on their looks, don't try stupid crap. Just be honest and open. Also try to get a sense of their mood...this is a big deal. If they're not in the mood to talk you're going to get shot down fast.
@@victoriasmith490 That is why I said "most" (but not all) women ;D. I think an athlete that can outrun a fleeing man, just because he noped out of a conversation, is unlikely to pursue him.
Best approach *ever* (my personal experience/ edit): A lovely relaxed evening in a well known and crowded pub. In between songs I received a tap on the shoulder and a guy asked me in a very nice and relaxed way "would you be very offended if I asked you to sleep with me" . LOL there was no way I could be offended by his politeness and I really appreciated the direct approach. It made me smile. (NO I did not sleep with him, but he turned out to be a great guy. Unfortunately there were always a couple of hundred miles between us afterwards/ deployed all over the planet, and we eventually did not stay in touch.)
Note to the "must be attractive" advice: you have no idea if someone finds you attractive until they tell you, and despite what Hollywood tells you, everyone has differing tastes. There can really be "a lid for every pot", as the saying goes. And no, if you're on the heavier side, while the stereotypes about you are cruel, that doesn't mean you're automatically a slob -- it means the clothes you have to work with weren't made with you in mind. Look to clothing brands made for the larger and/or taller guy, invest in getting a few pieces tailored (which is actually why the Chris Evans of the world look good -- tailoring), and learn how to put outfits together. Work on your posture if you can, it does make a huge difference on its own, and finally: walk around with an attitude of self-assurance. A mindset of knowing that the world isn't out to get you, "what will be, will be, and I will roll with it", that attitude is a great one to have. It not only projects the kind of attitude many women like in men, but it will help you in your day to day life as you take on the challenges of the day. Dating shouldn't be your only goal in life -- being a self-actualized, self-assured person who can handle your business should be your first goal. Everything else follows on.
yeah 'attractive' is basically the one word equivalent of 'beauty is in the eye of the beholder'. someone might not look special to most people, but they're everything that someone else has every dreamt of. one person's plain and simple is another person's amazingly beautiful
@@alleycatalog Basically. Everyone will be attractive to someone, face and body type wise, but putting effort into your presentation and care will show that you will put effort into a relationship, and are worth the effort someone can put into a relationship with you.
Great start! No use getting upset trying for something that is not available. Most women (and men) will understand the challenge it is to approach someone, and will take it as a compliment you made the effort! So even if we say "no" you made our day a bit better, unless.... the attitude from a lot of guys that screams "I made the effort, now hand me my reward" as if we have no choice that truly scares and threatens us! Getting together (for just a chat or making babies and having grandchildren along the line) should always be a free choice for both parties.
This video is a perfect example of why I've stopped approaching women altogether what's absurd to me is what is the a need to be with a woman in the first place - men have to do all the work, they have to make a constant effort not to say the wrong thing or step out of line and that they do, and most of time she'll either get hysterical, tell you she has a boyfriend, or at worst report you to an authority, in which she'll initially be believed. Why not just skip the whole process? For happiness? You'll find happiness in other ways, self fullfilment, family, personal goals. To ease the fear of dying alone? Chances are she'll die before you or you'll seperate eitherway, very rarely do couples die together bonded in eachother's arms like the "Psyche Revived by Cupid's Kiss". At the moment I'm studying animation, I'm improving on myself and, being honest, I feel alot better now that I don't bother with women anymore. not to mention my self esteem and self image has majorly improved (I've been dressing and grooming much better) I also find the amount of privilage and entitlement women have honestly sickening. Women have all the jurisdiction on the faith of a man's life when it comes to accusations and many men's lives have been ruined as a result, and yet these man hating women still complain. and also, I am not using the word ""Rad"", sorry
A couple things. Different things will work for different women. And please, never get angry if she says no. I can only speak for myself, but when I'm approached by a random guy, my first thoughts are about my safety. I had to explain this to my brother the other day and he was absolutely shocked. Before I think about whether or not I'm attracted to you, I have to determine whether you are a threat or not, if you are stable, if you are telling the truth... This is what I'm thinking when you are walking up to me giving me your best opener. And I am an opened, people loving person. I've just been burned THAT many times. I don't mind being approached at all, once I determine that you are not a danger to me. If I'm not interested, I say so politely and pleasantly. It doesn't piss me off to get approached. But depending on the circumstances it does make me nervous sometimes. I was working alone in the back of a store once, and a guy approached me and started to flirt. He was huge! He seemed Pleasant, and friendly, but he was very persistent and I started looking for exits in case I had to make a break for it, and thinking of an excuse to end the conversation that would not make him angry. That poor guy probably had the best of intentions, but not all men do, and It Only Takes One Nut Job, and a woman can be in serious trouble. These kinds of things happen all the time. When men approach women, men see an opportunity for connection with a potential to be embarrassed. Women also see an opportunity for connection, with potential Danger. I'm posting this because my brother was completely surprised to hear this, so a lot of other men must not know it either. And telling her that there is nothing to worry about DOES NOT HELP. You have to show her. Keep a bit of a distance. If she seems nervous, back up a bit. Try to relax. Over eagerness can be mistaken for instability. I'd be happy to answer more questions if you would like.
I mean alot of this just sounds like hiding your intentions as if you genuinely just approached this woman for no reason. It sounds like were being unintentionally told to manipulate and deceive... so dumb to me.
You've missed the point. It gives women the chance to check you out. Get a feel for who you are. Believe me, we know why men talk to us in most cases. Especially on the street
Every man I’ve dated, I met at a party, at work, or through mutual friends. Either i knew him or I had friends who would voich for him. Complete strangers at best have made me lol walking past me. I laughed and was flattered by compliments but I didn’t think they were really asking me out or showing real interest. Unfortunately, I speak to people in public sometimes . This is unfortunate because it’s sometimes taken as expressing dating interest. Sorry, I was just finding some situation at the grocery store funny and I said it out loud. For anyone who has strong reactions when a woman says “no”, consider that the person you see may not be the person she looks like. You don’t know her age, her health conditions, her beliefs, her living situation, her feelings for someone else. No, I’m not seeing anyone. Also, no, I don’t want to give you my number. There’s no comfortable way to say that. I’m socially awkward too and never connect “are you married” with the guy asking me that then expecting a date. I am finally strong enough not to give out my number to strangers. I need to stop answering all the other questions, too.
LOL I hear you. One plus: once you get older (and older and older) that problem will go away. Do not change, keep sharing your stories/ observations with strangers, you probably make people happy with them. Human contact is getting quite rare, stay human! And asking someone "are you married" implies "if you have a guy protecting you I will back off, otherwise I consider you fair game" -> which is threatening in itself! So you are not wrong in taking that one badly ;). Why can't these guys just say " Hey, I think I like you and am wondering if you would/could like me too?" - it would make it so much easier to say " You look like (you may be) a nice guy, but I am not shopping for one right now". In that case you both receive a compliment (the other party thinks I am a nice person) and nobody feels bad about it.
@@muurrarium9460 That response to the “are you married” will also work for the guys who just ask me to marry them. Your suggestion is much kinder, thank you. As I’ve often thought, I’m not that bad, I just need better writers.
@@Sunset553 We all do :) do not be too hard on yourself. Witty repartee mostly only happens on screen, and it takes a team of scriptwriters to come up with one sentence...
So basically you can only date girls you already know or co workers which usually ends badly. Fuck women are a waste of time you just keep provin it dude
If women didn't want to get harassed they'd do the approaching. Don't tell us to read your body language or ambiguous signals, they're ambiguous. People can talk for a reason, don't claim men are bad at communicating when you try to manipulate everything passive aggressively in a relationship.
You don't need social media to meet women - is what I'd say pre-covid. Nowadays, it is weird out there because that cute booty chick might be a man under the mask. Lolol Good luck being single or good luck looking!
@@chaosgamer016_5 Nice. You will meet plenty of girls in school and your spelling will only get better. Focus up in high school though, it is all that really matters.
"It is really too bad, unfortunate, sad, that our schools do not teach conversation-skills, conversation-ability, human interaction ability, ability to connect with people, or that our society doesn't place more importance on those. They are just as important as math or history or any other subject. Hell, to me, they are much more important, thousands of times, millions of times more important, because communication is the way you climb social-ladders." "The better you are at conversation, the easier it is to get a job, promotion, attract people to form relationships, networking with people to advance professionally, networking with people for job prospects, and befriend people with ease" Never truer words have been said or spoken, it's a sarcastic mindset of mine but I feel men need it far more than women do or just men need far more social skills training than women do since men have always been expected to do the heavy lifting in social interactions between men and women
If you want a woman, or a person in general, to smile, tell them a joke. Jokes bring on laughter, which start with smiles. Make sure it’s a good joke, not a mean joke or a bullying that’s in the form of a joke.
first few dates/meetups: leave as many options open to make the lady feel like she has choices! It also makes you seem more adaptable and humble, therefore, takes the pressure off of having to guess and control the sexual situation - you can actually ask what she likes without it looking like youre inexperienced..you just come off as a gentleman eager to learn her body..its hot. Oh and dont try to control the date/meetup and move it towards sex too quick...too much control makes you seem like a sexual predator MILES before sex is brought up. its creepier when it does get brought up. And if she takes too damn long to choose, bring out a few options with potentially hilarious outcomes (eg. "hey lets go grab some food and just ride the trains and watch people", play some games that involve people watching, ask some crazy situational scenarios that could have some fascinating answers, etc.). If shes not eager, at least you come off as adventurous and exciting so you can walk away head held high. If she IS eager then she might be available. If she's not into dating, but still goes ahead, then you just scored yourself a friend. This can also be a great step: the more female friends you have, the more you appear approachable and dateable and um...sexy? idk what it is, chicks just seem to gravitate towards guys who have female friends. Maybe its some lowkey indication that theres no pressure coming from yo, but more from your hot female friends and so the interested chick might actually approach YOU more to...less work for you and clearer signs of interest.
I'll keep some of this stuff in mind when I try but a lot of this doesn't really apply in most situations. It all depends on that woman's idea of what is good idea. When looking at these comments in the video they tend contradict each other a lot. I say this because what a woman considers "creepy" varies from woman to woman. While there are some gems in here most of it doesn't help. So I'm still gonna take my shot and hope for the best with the good bits in here in mind.
My rule of thumb: play it by ear. If you are feeling her and think she's feeling you. If the vibes are right. Go for it. Otherwise, call it a wash and move on
Don't approach women ever. Work on yourself until they approach you. Be aloof, be zen, ultimately come to the conclusion that they're not worth your time. Grind and work on you. Stay strong kings. 💪
'something they have control over, not body or face' just wanna say we all have some control over these things. you can eat more/less or work out more/less to decrease or increase your size. i think complimenting someone for having a fit body is a good thing. if someone spends hours in the gym, it's nice for someone to acknowledge that and they would appreciate that
This is hard one because I do agree that for those who work out and spend a lot of time and effort on their body/at the gym, some may like it to hear “wow, do you work out?”, but some also may not, and there’s not much of a way to tell right off the bat. I think for most women, hearing any comment about their body, even if it’s a compliment, immediately get us thinking about our body and feeling self conscious, while also put off by the fact that the shape of our body is what’s in the top of your head at the moment. Even if it’s well intentioned, it can come off as awkward or even frightening if done especially poorly. Sometimes it can work but I wonder if it’s just better to be safe than sorry and talk about something else. I know I’d much rather hear a guy ask about the stickers on my laptop than comment on how good my shorts make my legs look!
@@handitover. I’m eternally shy and introverted, so I won’t be commenting on anyone’s appearance. Naturally more likely to express excitement over cool stickers 😂
Every woman I've ever asked out after having met in person said yes. Every one of them also turned out to already have a boyfriend, fiancé, or husband at the time. I don't hit on anyone anymore.
Best approach is not approaching women at all. Just wait until women approach you to avoid all the conundrums and difficulties with approaching women as a man
usually just mention something small like "oh thats a good book" or "i like that band too" or "i like your style" to initiate conversation. try to stay away from statements on her body/apperance because that can come off as creepy. maybe exchange a few sentences and then tell her your name and ask for hers. be friendly. but dont try too hard or be overly agressive
The best guys I’ve met always ask about the bands on my tshirts! Discussing and learning about each others interests and passions is a great way to connect!
I saw a guy fill up 4 different girls on a bed and walk away with a girlfriend. Literally just layed in the middle of a group of girls. I accidentally bumped his hand and he immediately puts it on my thigh and rubs. I slap the shit out of him. Then two minutes later my friend taps me, told me he had just felt her up, then pointed to my friend who was holding his hand and smiling weirdly. He also had one girl who called him Little (his name with and ie on the end) and he had kept hiking her dress up and she just kept tying to pull it down but was too nice to tell him to stop. Don't do that shit. Lol
I dont understand the whole approaching random women thing. Sure, for a one night stand it makes sense, but why get so bent up over it then? If you want to be almost guaranteed, you have to go with volume. Talk to a lot of women and surely youll find someone who might wanna have sex. For a relationship this shit doesnt work you gotta know what youre getting into. Its the worst thing when youre already together and only then get to know each other.
That’s why it’s better to approach the “randomly talking to a woman at bar” as less of a way to score a girlfriend and more of a way to score a friend. Save the relationship goal for the future. Two hours of trivia together at a pub and you discover you both love tennis? Perfect, let’s meet up for tennis sometime! And now you have a friend. And like you said, friends are where the best relationships grow from!
Did I hear that one right? If you are talking to me just because you find me attractive, don't talk to me. Assuming I did, that makes no sense. We are all creatures of sight. If we see someone, we think looks good, we are going to talk to them. We are not going to talk to someone we do not find attractive. That is man or woman. I cannot believe that a woman who is approached by a man she does not fine attractive will be given a chance. It does not matter if he says and does everything right. If he has "man boobs," it's over before it starts. She will not talk to a man she does not find attractive and that is her right. But she does not hold herself to the same requirement she would put on a man. Women are taught to be polite? Where? That one must have come from somewhere that is not the U.S.A.
A majority of these tips mention waiting for a social environment such as a bar. but what it's in a supermarket or in the st where you're most unlikely to see this person every again. Surely you have to take the shot or forever wonder wha could have been
Women just aren’t interested in me I accept this and I have had a lot more friends now although I have to be careful because a lot of women take my attitude as being vulnerable and try to take advantage of me which is just awkward.
If they are not interested, why would they take advantage? (OH wait...you are American and this is a "free meal" / "free drinks" kind of situation? In NL, we 'go dutch' automatically, letting a guy pay for something is actually a big step in the direction of a serious relationship. So I always forget dating practices differ...)
Don’t give up Chris! Give it time, stay genuine, and keep it up with the friends, they make everything better. And yeah, going Dutch may be a good way to stop the issue of being taken advantage of, I’m sorry it happens :( there’s someone out there for you, Good luck!
Probably not the best person for advice since I have only been in one relationship (lasted 5 days:/) but, basically *Don't immediately ask for our numbers *Don't excessively talk about yourself/ continue to talk to us even if we clearly don't show interest And I'm not sure about everyone else about the "don't talk to me if I have headphones on" thing, but I listen to music excessively (get anxious/stressed if I don't have some sort of sound)and if you would like to talk to me just lightly tap my shoulder or wave in front of my face (not directly but a foot away will do) And I will attemt to communicate with you. Hope this somewhat helps
This stuff is so contradictory, what comes out of it is basically *"we sometimes want to be approached, sometimes not, sometimes it depends on the guy, so just guess whether we do or not and act accordingly"* -_- And then they say women don't communicate in ways that are incoherent, that it's a stereotype....XD
Are all men the same? No. Neither are all women. What works for some of us does not work for others. For example, I talk to anyone, anywhere anytime but it doesn't mean I am flirting. So if a guy was hitting on me in public I would wonder if he's just a friendly guy or flirting. This is how I met my husband. Turns out he was flirting. He did just what the other women said to. Talked about things until I realized and then he asked me out for coffee. He did not compliment my body. He did not leer. He was very polite. But some women might not ever feel comfortable talking to some random guy on the street ever. We are NOT all the same.
@@KRaikkonenSF because that's the best anybody can do... Generalities. Generally there is no physical danger for men to approach women. There is a physical danger for women, so it makes them either get angry/annoyed, nervous, or proceed with caution. It depends on the person and situation.
Also, if she's lesbian and states it right away leave her alone. I don't have enough fingers tho count the times i have been forcefully engaged in a discussion about my sexuality and why is it wrong and it's because i haven't tried a dong. This happens to me a lot especially with people fron the middle east (rather than caucasians, africans or latinos, they seem to be more open minded on this), and some of them asked with politness and instantly stopped hitting on me, they only made questions out of curiosity and I don't mind that. I can get that probably in your country is illegal being gay or theres a heavy stigma out of it, and I'm gonna answer whatever polite question u might have, but don't try to enforce me your belives only because you were taught otherwise, I'm not trying to convert you or smth duh don't do the same
Just go into the situation as yourself as awkward as you may be don't come off like you're trying to force anything. Make sure you're washing your ass regularly and most importantly DON'T HAVE EXPECTATIONS OF ANYTHING PAST A CONVERSATION. Them expectations are the reason why you're so hurt when you get told no.
NUMBER 1 TIP Don't be ugly. With the sexual revolution even ugly women (ugly both in an apperence sense and personality) can get with top tier men. So us guys who are below average in one way or another is doomed
Ugly is subjective, everyone’s got their own taste. I personally love chubby guys and guys with bigger noses, which i suppose is off from what is considered the ideal attractiveness of today’s guys. The “attractiveness” of your body and face matters less to most (not all, unfortunately) women. If you are a kind open well-intentioned guy with **good hygiene** that respects the ladies you talk to, I promise you’ll make tons of friends and relationships with women! It take practice, dont give up! There’s some one out there for you mike!
@@mikefitzgerald18 and that's 100% okay. Even if you don't have a flawless beard or perfectly chiseled muscles you are still absolutely worthy of love! I know how hard self-esteem can be to build up. But with effort, self-esteem is something you can actually work on to improve and over time you can gain confidence that will help life become much more fun to navigate. Remember that you don't have to "measure up" to anything (being the strongest/hottest/manliest guy in the room), and don't let people around you make you feel lesser because you don't fit into what they think "handsome" should look like. You just have to be the genuine you and I promise that if you have a good heart and a great laugh, most people (all the good people, at least) will look straight through your looks and love you for you! I wish I had some resources on hand to link, but if this is something that is really affecting your quality of life I would suggest talking to a therapist-- they can help a lot on building good habits and seeing yourself in a better light. If you're iffy about professionals, you could check out some self-help/self-esteem books online; some of them have really helpful advice! I hope this has at least been a tiny bit helpful and I'm sorry for the novel of a response haha. Have a good day Mike!
We have some control over that. Color and style and we often put a lot of effort into it so I would say yes techincally but also no. Compliments on hair is not the same as compliments on bodies.
If youre approaching a girl at a party, please don’t come up with a drink and offer it to us. I know 99% you just want to be nice but in our minds we are immediately wondering if it’s been drugged. Please don’t take it personally if we say no either! It’s just better to be safe than sorry. It’s ok to offer to buy us a drink at a bar/pub as long as we are there and can see the bartender mix it for us. That is greatly appreciated! You guys in the comments all sound very sweet and I wish you luck in your romantic endeavors!
The best thing to approach women is be attractive if you have that you almost say what ever you want. I have a attractive friend he talks crazy to women and gets them 70% of the time. Have money is also helps you drive up in a Lamborghini you can get a lot of women too. I can make most women cry from laughing that does not work it helps but is something women say they want but don’t. I’m not blaming women that’s just the game.
@@CrimTube Oh *that* yup, that's an internet thingy I guess. I was explaining to someone I had boobs, so I wasn't a 'dude', but then was told "dude" today means male&female at the same time .... But you are right, the whole #metoo makes things a lot harder for anyone. I think that (oh blast I forgot his name again) had a very, very good point: unless men actively step up and intervene/ correct their peers/fellow men if they are misbehaving there is no hope for any of us (male of female). It is such a shame that 2% of any gender can make life so very, very difficult for the other 98%. Grinn I thought "Lostgears" was an anime-character or something and had a vast meaning (which I completely missed out on).
@Jas Yann The thing about #metoo is that there are *some* men who will not respect personal boundaries, especially when they are in a position of power. (Of course there are some women who did and do the same thing, but somehow the male victims are mostly ignored) Unfortunately acknowledging that abuse makes all men somehow look bad? (A question mark because I am convinced most guys are just great people and not out there to abuse trust and force women into things they do not want. Just like most women are not bat-shit-crazy ;) Even though there are some days when one may doubt that ;) )
Only once did I cold approach a woman I had never seen before. She was walking by carrying an orange that was larger than a large grapefruit. I said “wow.” And when she looked, I said “that’s a big orange.” We ended up together for two years. So maybe watch for interesting fruit.
This is the correct method. Comment on her oranges
Don't attempt by serenading with a song about cheese. It don't work. But I think that dude has a nice story. (It was a dare and i* was 15.)
They all pretty much just said read their body language and that they dont trust you in most scenarios
Sounds like the average Salesman vs potential-buyer scenario. We assume a salesperson is trying to actively scam us an react accordingly.
@@anders8204 Actually, give her your number and if she want to be on touch, she will, is the best advice.
+ They make killer nachos
- This is a sushi bar
+ I never said that they were good at making them ;D
I’ll give it a shot, Mr B
Puffer fish nachos
Hey! For example, The best thing in McDonald's are the chicken nuggets, not the burgers!
no lie, there should be more convos in regards to this subjects, thank you ladies this has been helpfull
Just say hello, how are you. Or say hello, do you mind if we talk/I join you? Don't try pick up lines, don't comment on their looks, don't try stupid crap. Just be honest and open. Also try to get a sense of their mood...this is a big deal. If they're not in the mood to talk you're going to get shot down fast.
Aka Recipe for sliding I to the friend zone.
Don't think I'll ever approach a woman the whole idea of it gives me the fear
Don't: most men can outrun a female :)
You have an advantage there. If it gets too much you can always run away.
@@muurrarium9460 *takes notes* great thinking
@@muurrarium9460 😂😂but what if she's an athlete?
@@victoriasmith490 That is why I said "most" (but not all) women ;D. I think an athlete that can outrun a fleeing man, just because he noped out of a conversation, is unlikely to pursue him.
@@muurrarium9460 true
Best approach *ever* (my personal experience/ edit): A lovely relaxed evening in a well known and crowded pub. In between songs I received a tap on the shoulder and a guy asked me in a very nice and relaxed way "would you be very offended if I asked you to sleep with me" . LOL there was no way I could be offended by his politeness and I really appreciated the direct approach. It made me smile. (NO I did not sleep with him, but he turned out to be a great guy. Unfortunately there were always a couple of hundred miles between us afterwards/ deployed all over the planet, and we eventually did not stay in touch.)
Note to the "must be attractive" advice: you have no idea if someone finds you attractive until they tell you, and despite what Hollywood tells you, everyone has differing tastes. There can really be "a lid for every pot", as the saying goes. And no, if you're on the heavier side, while the stereotypes about you are cruel, that doesn't mean you're automatically a slob -- it means the clothes you have to work with weren't made with you in mind. Look to clothing brands made for the larger and/or taller guy, invest in getting a few pieces tailored (which is actually why the Chris Evans of the world look good -- tailoring), and learn how to put outfits together. Work on your posture if you can, it does make a huge difference on its own, and finally: walk around with an attitude of self-assurance. A mindset of knowing that the world isn't out to get you, "what will be, will be, and I will roll with it", that attitude is a great one to have. It not only projects the kind of attitude many women like in men, but it will help you in your day to day life as you take on the challenges of the day. Dating shouldn't be your only goal in life -- being a self-actualized, self-assured person who can handle your business should be your first goal. Everything else follows on.
Okay so substitute attractive for good grooming. No one wants to date a smelly slob. Men or women.
yeah 'attractive' is basically the one word equivalent of 'beauty is in the eye of the beholder'. someone might not look special to most people, but they're everything that someone else has every dreamt of. one person's plain and simple is another person's amazingly beautiful
@@alleycatalog Basically. Everyone will be attractive to someone, face and body type wise, but putting effort into your presentation and care will show that you will put effort into a relationship, and are worth the effort someone can put into a relationship with you.
Great start! No use getting upset trying for something that is not available.
Most women (and men) will understand the challenge it is to approach someone, and will take it as a compliment you made the effort!
So even if we say "no" you made our day a bit better, unless....
the attitude from a lot of guys that screams "I made the effort, now hand me my reward" as if we have no choice that truly scares and threatens us!
Getting together (for just a chat or making babies and having grandchildren along the line) should always be a free choice for both parties.
This video is a perfect example of why I've stopped approaching women altogether
what's absurd to me is what is the a need to be with a woman in the first place - men have to do all the work, they have to make a constant effort not to say the wrong thing or step out of line and that they do, and most of time she'll either get hysterical, tell you she has a boyfriend, or at worst report you to an authority, in which she'll initially be believed.
Why not just skip the whole process? For happiness? You'll find happiness in other ways, self fullfilment, family, personal goals. To ease the fear of dying alone? Chances are she'll die before you or you'll seperate eitherway, very rarely do couples die together bonded in eachother's arms like the "Psyche Revived by Cupid's Kiss". At the moment I'm studying animation, I'm improving on myself and, being honest, I feel alot better now that I don't bother with women anymore. not to mention my self esteem and self image has majorly improved (I've been dressing and grooming much better)
I also find the amount of privilage and entitlement women have honestly sickening. Women have all the jurisdiction on the faith of a man's life when it comes to accusations and many men's lives have been ruined as a result, and yet these man hating women still complain.
and also, I am not using the word ""Rad"", sorry
A couple things. Different things will work for different women. And please, never get angry if she says no.
I can only speak for myself, but when I'm approached by a random guy, my first thoughts are about my safety. I had to explain this to my brother the other day and he was absolutely shocked. Before I think about whether or not I'm attracted to you, I have to determine whether you are a threat or not, if you are stable, if you are telling the truth... This is what I'm thinking when you are walking up to me giving me your best opener. And I am an opened, people loving person. I've just been burned THAT many times.
I don't mind being approached at all, once I determine that you are not a danger to me. If I'm not interested, I say so politely and pleasantly. It doesn't piss me off to get approached. But depending on the circumstances it does make me nervous sometimes.
I was working alone in the back of a store once, and a guy approached me and started to flirt. He was huge! He seemed Pleasant, and friendly, but he was very persistent and I started looking for exits in case I had to make a break for it, and thinking of an excuse to end the conversation that would not make him angry. That poor guy probably had the best of intentions, but not all men do, and It Only Takes One Nut Job, and a woman can be in serious trouble. These kinds of things happen all the time. When men approach women, men see an opportunity for connection with a potential to be embarrassed. Women also see an opportunity for connection, with potential Danger. I'm posting this because my brother was completely surprised to hear this, so a lot of other men must not know it either. And telling her that there is nothing to worry about DOES NOT HELP. You have to show her. Keep a bit of a distance. If she seems nervous, back up a bit. Try to relax. Over eagerness can be mistaken for instability. I'd be happy to answer more questions if you would like.
I mean alot of this just sounds like hiding your intentions as if you genuinely just approached this woman for no reason. It sounds like were being unintentionally told to manipulate and deceive... so dumb to me.
You've missed the point. It gives women the chance to check you out. Get a feel for who you are. Believe me, we know why men talk to us in most cases. Especially on the street
Every man I’ve dated, I met at a party, at work, or through mutual friends. Either i knew him or I had friends who would voich for him.
Complete strangers at best have made me lol walking past me. I laughed and was flattered by compliments but I didn’t think they were really asking me out or showing real interest.
Unfortunately, I speak to people in public sometimes . This is unfortunate because it’s sometimes taken as expressing dating interest. Sorry, I was just finding some situation at the grocery store funny and I said it out loud.
For anyone who has strong reactions when a woman says “no”, consider that the person you see may not be the person she looks like. You don’t know her age, her health conditions, her beliefs, her living situation, her feelings for someone else. No, I’m not seeing anyone. Also, no, I don’t want to give you my number. There’s no comfortable way to say that. I’m socially awkward too and never connect “are you married” with the guy asking me that then expecting a date.
I am finally strong enough not to give out my number to strangers. I need to stop answering all the other questions, too.
LOL I hear you. One plus: once you get older (and older and older) that problem will go away. Do not change, keep sharing your stories/ observations with strangers, you probably make people happy with them. Human contact is getting quite rare, stay human!
And asking someone "are you married" implies "if you have a guy protecting you I will back off, otherwise I consider you fair game" -> which is threatening in itself!
So you are not wrong in taking that one badly ;).
Why can't these guys just say " Hey, I think I like you and am wondering if you would/could like me too?" - it would make it so much easier to say " You look like (you may be) a nice guy, but I am not shopping for one right now". In that case you both receive a compliment (the other party thinks I am a nice person) and nobody feels bad about it.
@@muurrarium9460 That response to the “are you married” will also work for the guys who just ask me to marry them. Your suggestion is much kinder, thank you. As I’ve often thought, I’m not that bad, I just need better writers.
@@Sunset553 We all do :) do not be too hard on yourself. Witty repartee mostly only happens on screen, and it takes a team of scriptwriters to come up with one sentence...
So basically you can only date girls you already know or co workers which usually ends badly. Fuck women are a waste of time you just keep provin it dude
If women didn't want to get harassed they'd do the approaching. Don't tell us to read your body language or ambiguous signals, they're ambiguous. People can talk for a reason, don't claim men are bad at communicating when you try to manipulate everything passive aggressively in a relationship.
dangle some cheetos on a string
Hot Cheetos you might be onto something.
Hahaha! 😂
Im male but the bigest reson I don't have an gf is becuse I dont have any of social media yeah I first need to escape my buble
You don't need social media to meet women - is what I'd say pre-covid.
Nowadays, it is weird out there because that cute booty chick might be a man under the mask. Lolol
Good luck being single or good luck looking!
No just stay in school.
@@chickenpermission7016 I don't know what you mean but tnx I guess
@@NickBuenoo dude Im working I finished scool 1 year ago
@@chaosgamer016_5 Nice. You will meet plenty of girls in school and your spelling will only get better. Focus up in high school though, it is all that really matters.
"It is really too bad, unfortunate, sad, that our schools do not teach conversation-skills, conversation-ability, human interaction ability, ability to connect with people, or that our society doesn't place more importance on those.
They are just as important as math or history or any other subject.
Hell, to me, they are much more important, thousands of times, millions of times more important, because communication is the way you climb social-ladders."
"The better you are at conversation, the easier it is to get a job, promotion, attract people to form relationships, networking with people to advance professionally, networking with people for job prospects, and befriend people with ease"
Never truer words have been said or spoken, it's a sarcastic mindset of mine but I feel men need it far more than women do or just men need far more social skills training than women do since men have always been expected to do the heavy lifting in social interactions between men and women
As a girl, about 80% of these are fantastic advice
No no it is not....
idk just casually ig. just don’t be creepy or stalker-ish
Basically don’t approach me at all. If you trying to hit on me or get my number I don’t care. That’s creepy and I don’t want to know you. 🤷🏻♀️
You’re the reason why people have bad self esteem when talking to women
Presenting their COVID vaccination card while remaining 6ft is a good start.
The video hasn’t even finished yet lmao
If you want a woman, or a person in general, to smile, tell them a joke. Jokes bring on laughter, which start with smiles. Make sure it’s a good joke, not a mean joke or a bullying that’s in the form of a joke.
first few dates/meetups: leave as many options open to make the lady feel like she has choices! It also makes you seem more adaptable and humble, therefore, takes the pressure off of having to guess and control the sexual situation - you can actually ask what she likes without it looking like youre inexperienced..you just come off as a gentleman eager to learn her body..its hot.
Oh and dont try to control the date/meetup and move it towards sex too quick...too much control makes you seem like a sexual predator MILES before sex is brought up. its creepier when it does get brought up.
And if she takes too damn long to choose, bring out a few options with potentially hilarious outcomes (eg. "hey lets go grab some food and just ride the trains and watch people", play some games that involve people watching, ask some crazy situational scenarios that could have some fascinating answers, etc.). If shes not eager, at least you come off as adventurous and exciting so you can walk away head held high. If she IS eager then she might be available. If she's not into dating, but still goes ahead, then you just scored yourself a friend. This can also be a great step: the more female friends you have, the more you appear approachable and dateable and um...sexy?
idk what it is, chicks just seem to gravitate towards guys who have female friends. Maybe its some lowkey indication that theres no pressure coming from yo, but more from your hot female friends and so the interested chick might actually approach YOU more to...less work for you and clearer signs of interest.
This is really great advice!! Adventurous random dates are always the best
I'll keep some of this stuff in mind when I try but a lot of this doesn't really apply in most situations. It all depends on that woman's idea of what is good idea. When looking at these comments in the video they tend contradict each other a lot. I say this because what a woman considers "creepy" varies from woman to woman. While there are some gems in here most of it doesn't help. So I'm still gonna take my shot and hope for the best with the good bits in here in mind.
My rule of thumb: play it by ear. If you are feeling her and think she's feeling you. If the vibes are right. Go for it. Otherwise, call it a wash and move on
A wise man once said "Bitches ain't nothing but hoes and tricks."
Dre had like one really bad experience with a girl and then generalised all of em dude
@@tipoftheiceberg7034 And he was fucking right.
There's only one valid response if they reject you.
"Someone's on their period."
Don't approach women ever. Work on yourself until they approach you. Be aloof, be zen, ultimately come to the conclusion that they're not worth your time. Grind and work on you. Stay strong kings. 💪
'something they have control over, not body or face' just wanna say we all have some control over these things. you can eat more/less or work out more/less to decrease or increase your size. i think complimenting someone for having a fit body is a good thing. if someone spends hours in the gym, it's nice for someone to acknowledge that and they would appreciate that
This is hard one because I do agree that for those who work out and spend a lot of time and effort on their body/at the gym, some may like it to hear “wow, do you work out?”, but some also may not, and there’s not much of a way to tell right off the bat. I think for most women, hearing any comment about their body, even if it’s a compliment, immediately get us thinking about our body and feeling self conscious, while also put off by the fact that the shape of our body is what’s in the top of your head at the moment. Even if it’s well intentioned, it can come off as awkward or even frightening if done especially poorly. Sometimes it can work but I wonder if it’s just better to be safe than sorry and talk about something else. I know I’d much rather hear a guy ask about the stickers on my laptop than comment on how good my shorts make my legs look!
@@handitover. I’m eternally shy and introverted, so I won’t be commenting on anyone’s appearance. Naturally more likely to express excitement over cool stickers 😂
Every woman I've ever asked out after having met in person said yes. Every one of them also turned out to already have a boyfriend, fiancé, or husband at the time.
I don't hit on anyone anymore.
me with aspergers constant confusion
Don't. Take. Advice. From. Redditors. Don't. Approach. Women. Live ya damn life. Not a single comment here is someone saying that the advice worked
Best approach is not approaching women at all. Just wait until women approach you to avoid all the conundrums and difficulties with approaching women as a man
This is really good advice :)
usually just mention something small like "oh thats a good book" or "i like that band too" or "i like your style" to initiate conversation. try to stay away from statements on her body/apperance because that can come off as creepy. maybe exchange a few sentences and then tell her your name and ask for hers. be friendly. but dont try too hard or be overly agressive
The best guys I’ve met always ask about the bands on my tshirts! Discussing and learning about each others interests and passions is a great way to connect!
I saw a guy fill up 4 different girls on a bed and walk away with a girlfriend. Literally just layed in the middle of a group of girls. I accidentally bumped his hand and he immediately puts it on my thigh and rubs. I slap the shit out of him. Then two minutes later my friend taps me, told me he had just felt her up, then pointed to my friend who was holding his hand and smiling weirdly. He also had one girl who called him Little (his name with and ie on the end) and he had kept hiking her dress up and she just kept tying to pull it down but was too nice to tell him to stop. Don't do that shit. Lol
I dont understand the whole approaching random women thing. Sure, for a one night stand it makes sense, but why get so bent up over it then? If you want to be almost guaranteed, you have to go with volume. Talk to a lot of women and surely youll find someone who might wanna have sex.
For a relationship this shit doesnt work you gotta know what youre getting into. Its the worst thing when youre already together and only then get to know each other.
That’s why it’s better to approach the “randomly talking to a woman at bar” as less of a way to score a girlfriend and more of a way to score a friend. Save the relationship goal for the future. Two hours of trivia together at a pub and you discover you both love tennis? Perfect, let’s meet up for tennis sometime! And now you have a friend. And like you said, friends are where the best relationships grow from!
@@handitover. that is so true!
Did I hear that one right? If you are talking to me just because you find me attractive, don't talk to me. Assuming I did, that makes no sense. We are all creatures of sight. If we see someone, we think looks good, we are going to talk to them. We are not going to talk to someone we do not find attractive. That is man or woman. I cannot believe that a woman who is approached by a man she does not fine attractive will be given a chance. It does not matter if he says and does everything right. If he has "man boobs," it's over before it starts. She will not talk to a man she does not find attractive and that is her right. But she does not hold herself to the same requirement she would put on a man.
Women are taught to be polite? Where? That one must have come from somewhere that is not the U.S.A.
Nah man this thread is a PRIME example why men not approaching yall no more Jescus Christ this exhausting just to read 🤦🏾♂️🤦🏾♂️🤦🏾♂️
They shouldn’t 😸 /hj I’m not sure tho tbh
don’t lol
If you ask for their name, ask them if there's a silent letter infront of it.
A majority of these tips mention waiting for a social environment such as a bar. but what it's in a supermarket or in the st where you're most unlikely to see this person every again. Surely you have to take the shot or forever wonder wha could have been
Women just aren’t interested in me I accept this and I have had a lot more friends now although I have to be careful because a lot of women take my attitude as being vulnerable and try to take advantage of me which is just awkward.
If they are not interested, why would they take advantage?
(OH wait...you are American and this is a "free meal" / "free drinks" kind of situation? In NL, we 'go dutch' automatically, letting a guy pay for something is actually a big step in the direction of a serious relationship. So I always forget dating practices differ...)
Don’t give up Chris! Give it time, stay genuine, and keep it up with the friends, they make everything better. And yeah, going Dutch may be a good way to stop the issue of being taken advantage of, I’m sorry it happens :( there’s someone out there for you, Good luck!
Probably not the best person for advice since I have only been in one relationship (lasted 5 days:/)
but, basically
*Don't immediately ask for our numbers
*Don't excessively talk about yourself/ continue to talk to us even if we clearly don't show interest
And I'm not sure about everyone else about the "don't talk to me if I have headphones on" thing, but I listen to music excessively (get anxious/stressed if I don't have some sort of sound)and if you would like to talk to me just lightly tap my shoulder or wave in front of my face (not directly but a foot away will do)
And I will attemt to communicate with you. Hope this somewhat helps
Actually, give her your number and if she want to be on touch, she will, is the best advice.
5 days and one relationship is not enough experience to be giving advice.
Well, now my socially awkward self might be able to actually approach women now
Just because someone smiles back doesn't mean it's a green light yall. I smile at everybody. Kids to old people.
dont, let them approach you, then tell them to bugger off
This stuff is so contradictory, what comes out of it is basically *"we sometimes want to be approached, sometimes not, sometimes it depends on the guy, so just guess whether we do or not and act accordingly"* -_-
And then they say women don't communicate in ways that are incoherent, that it's a stereotype....XD
Are all men the same? No. Neither are all women. What works for some of us does not work for others. For example, I talk to anyone, anywhere anytime but it doesn't mean I am flirting. So if a guy was hitting on me in public I would wonder if he's just a friendly guy or flirting. This is how I met my husband. Turns out he was flirting. He did just what the other women said to. Talked about things until I realized and then he asked me out for coffee. He did not compliment my body. He did not leer. He was very polite. But some women might not ever feel comfortable talking to some random guy on the street ever. We are NOT all the same.
@@alleycatalog yeah so why are so many people coming up with some ideas that they present as general rules ?
@@KRaikkonenSF because that's the best anybody can do... Generalities. Generally there is no physical danger for men to approach women. There is a physical danger for women, so it makes them either get angry/annoyed, nervous, or proceed with caution. It depends on the person and situation.
@Jas Yann So..... there's like no f*cking answer to the question, then, which is my point
@@crystalcole888OK so would you say there is more physical danger in the presence of black or latino men ? Because statistics show.....
One word...
Don't.
Also, if she's lesbian and states it right away leave her alone. I don't have enough fingers tho count the times i have been forcefully engaged in a discussion about my sexuality and why is it wrong and it's because i haven't tried a dong. This happens to me a lot especially with people fron the middle east (rather than caucasians, africans or latinos, they seem to be more open minded on this), and some of them asked with politness and instantly stopped hitting on me, they only made questions out of curiosity and I don't mind that. I can get that probably in your country is illegal being gay or theres a heavy stigma out of it, and I'm gonna answer whatever polite question u might have, but don't try to enforce me your belives only because you were taught otherwise, I'm not trying to convert you or smth duh don't do the same
Portuguese CC Lol
Just go into the situation as yourself as awkward as you may be don't come off like you're trying to force anything. Make sure you're washing your ass regularly and most importantly DON'T HAVE EXPECTATIONS OF ANYTHING PAST A CONVERSATION. Them expectations are the reason why you're so hurt when you get told no.
i dont know why this is making me sadder and dont want to approach women more :(0
NUMBER 1 TIP
Don't be ugly. With the sexual revolution even ugly women (ugly both in an apperence sense and personality) can get with top tier men. So us guys who are below average in one way or another is doomed
Ugly is subjective, everyone’s got their own taste. I personally love chubby guys and guys with bigger noses, which i suppose is off from what is considered the ideal attractiveness of today’s guys. The “attractiveness” of your body and face matters less to most (not all, unfortunately) women. If you are a kind open well-intentioned guy with **good hygiene** that respects the ladies you talk to, I promise you’ll make tons of friends and relationships with women! It take practice, dont give up! There’s some one out there for you mike!
Also I love your profile picture haha
@@handitover. thanks
@@mikefitzgerald18 and that's 100% okay. Even if you don't have a flawless beard or perfectly chiseled muscles you are still absolutely worthy of love! I know how hard self-esteem can be to build up. But with effort, self-esteem is something you can actually work on to improve and over time you can gain confidence that will help life become much more fun to navigate. Remember that you don't have to "measure up" to anything (being the strongest/hottest/manliest guy in the room), and don't let people around you make you feel lesser because you don't fit into what they think "handsome" should look like. You just have to be the genuine you and I promise that if you have a good heart and a great laugh, most people (all the good people, at least) will look straight through your looks and love you for you! I wish I had some resources on hand to link, but if this is something that is really affecting your quality of life I would suggest talking to a therapist-- they can help a lot on building good habits and seeing yourself in a better light. If you're iffy about professionals, you could check out some self-help/self-esteem books online; some of them have really helpful advice! I hope this has at least been a tiny bit helpful and I'm sorry for the novel of a response haha. Have a good day Mike!
Stop looking for Top Tier if you are not top tier.
"How to approach a women?"
Don't...
Does hair count as a physical trait?
We have some control over that. Color and style and we often put a lot of effort into it so I would say yes techincally but also no. Compliments on hair is not the same as compliments on bodies.
@@alleycatalog depends could be a mix of both. Eg: I love the way you've styled your hair, it really frames your face/highlights your cheekbones.
Eh, as a female singleton, I keep to myself.
I hate this generation
If youre approaching a girl at a party, please don’t come up with a drink and offer it to us. I know 99% you just want to be nice but in our minds we are immediately wondering if it’s been drugged. Please don’t take it personally if we say no either! It’s just better to be safe than sorry. It’s ok to offer to buy us a drink at a bar/pub as long as we are there and can see the bartender mix it for us. That is greatly appreciated! You guys in the comments all sound very sweet and I wish you luck in your romantic endeavors!
100%
Helpful
The best thing to approach women is be attractive if you have that you almost say what ever you want. I have a attractive friend he talks crazy to women and gets them 70% of the time. Have money is also helps you drive up in a Lamborghini you can get a lot of women too. I can make most women cry from laughing that does not work it helps but is something women say they want but don’t. I’m not blaming women that’s just the game.
Where the hell did you get that bs idea man
Bottom line, if you don't want the women in your life approached that way, then don't approach women that way.
Or just don't approach women at all
Seriously.... WHAT IS UP WITH THE CC?????? UGH!!!!!
Evening
imagine following all of this 'advice', you would be a parking meter attempting to flirt with a hooman wimen
RRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
Just dont approach woman, it probably wouldnt work and isnt worth the afford, specialy when you arent tall, athletic and handsome.
Modern feminism: don't
Kinda hard to women as normal people with the #metoo bs.
Woman speaking here since I could troll you with this name hardcore.
Why would your username have *any* significance at all? (not trolling you, I really have *no* idea)
@@muurrarium9460 Idk what this person means by that either.
@@muurrarium9460 a lot of people on here for some reason assume I am male.
@@CrimTube Oh *that* yup, that's an internet thingy I guess. I was explaining to someone I had boobs, so I wasn't a 'dude', but then was told "dude" today means male&female at the same time ....
But you are right, the whole #metoo makes things a lot harder for anyone. I think that (oh blast I forgot his name again) had a very, very good point: unless men actively step up and intervene/ correct their peers/fellow men if they are misbehaving there is no hope for any of us (male of female). It is such a shame that 2% of any gender can make life so very, very difficult for the other 98%.
Grinn I thought "Lostgears" was an anime-character or something and had a vast meaning (which I completely missed out on).
@Jas Yann The thing about #metoo is that there are *some* men who will not respect personal boundaries, especially when they are in a position of power. (Of course there are some women who did and do the same thing, but somehow the male victims are mostly ignored) Unfortunately acknowledging that abuse makes all men somehow look bad? (A question mark because I am convinced most guys are just great people and not out there to abuse trust and force women into things they do not want. Just like most women are not bat-shit-crazy ;) Even though there are some days when one may doubt that ;) )