John’s Dementia Vlog - Talking to our daughter Kate
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 15 ก.ย. 2024
- Our daughter Kate comes by to help out every Tuesday evening while I’m at my Samba band practice. She is an absolute rock here for me and I don’t know if I could do this without her support and help. I hope you enjoy this casual chat with her where I cover two important topics; what she does as a care helper, and how all of this has affected her and how she’s coping. Kate is very open, sharing, observant and also insightful and I think you’re going to enjoy this. @Katevg
Hello everyone! Thank you for such lovely comments. It was really nice to hear that some of you enjoyed my own perspectives on things.
I like reading all your comments on my dad's TH-cams. It's a great joy that on Tuesdays sometimes he'll tell me his favorite comments that he engaged in.
There doesn't seem to be a lot of unique support for frontal temporal lobe dementia in combination with primary progressive aphasia.
When my dad started this TH-cam channel and started getting commenters and subscribers, it was the first time that he seemed to be getting the support that he needed.
Thank you all so much for looking out for my dad and being that support group that he needs. I'm trying my hardest but I couldn't do it without you all.
You are a very special daughter. Thank you for helping your dad and giving him respite on Tuesday nights. My Aunt had primary progressive aphasia as well. It is very difficult as they lose their ability to communicate. Your mom is very blessed to have you and your dad caring for her.
Thank you for being there for your dad. He definitely needs that time to go out. My sister has frontotemporal dementia behavioral variant and global aphasia. It’s been rough, so I understand exactly what is going on. I understand the grieving when things trigger you. I also get trigger and ugly cry. I wish the best for your family.
Thank you Kate for everything! God Bless you❤️🙏
Kate, you are a terrific caregiver and both Mom and Dad are lucky to have you. And as you know, your dad is a terrific guy. 👍🏻❤️
Thanks for sharing your care giving and feelings 🫶🏼
She sure looks like her mom. What a blessing she is.
Kate is so mature and pragmatic for a young woman in her early 30’s. The likeness is obvious, and kate’s warmth and brains are palpable. For such a devastating diagnosis, Heather is truly lucky to be surrounded by such love and care. 😓🧡💛❤️
Kate is so well spoken, professional & loving. What a sweet daughter.
She’s my rock ❤
Your daughter is a beautiful blessing. I can see she really loves the both of you. You and Heather did a wonderful job raising her. GOD bless you all.
Thank you to all of you.
Kate, you have such a wonderful, positive attitude about all this.
John, thank you for sharing these videos, for providing helpful, practical information, and for your heartfelt candor. My thanks to your daughter, too.
I was hoping you would visit the channel. Your podcast has been a great help to me. Thanks!
Everyone: Zita who left this comment, has one of the most profound podcasts I have ever heard. If you’re a spousal caregiver, you really owe it to yourself to tune in and listen to this. www.myspousehasdementia.com/
What a precious daughter with a precious attitude. ❤
You have a lovely, articulate and level-headed daughter there John. There is an advert running in the UK at the moment where a guy (I think he is making his wedding speech) says "The first time I lost my mum was XXXXX, then second time was XXXXX, the third time, etc etc. The grieving process with dementia's is protracted and cruel. I lost my mother in 4 months to pancreatic cancer. There is no easy way to lose somebody but keep supporting each other !
What a wonderful family! I am the mom of two boys and my oldest has multiple disabilities and will be living with me for life. It is nice to see a family working together to support each other through challenges.
Truly awesome! 💞🍃✨
A family like mine is maybe more typical..caring in specific situations but otherwise detached and unaware.
With lifelong chronic health issues I have learned self management recognizing siblings just can’t grasp situation. I didn’t anticipate this as our mother was awesome with her own mother in law’s failing health and soon after with her mother’s Alzheimer’s. She was loving and resourceful. My siblings surprised me with being oblivious to our mother’s encroaching dementia and cascading decline. In her final year they dropped their clueless perspective ultimately having her sign a directive to end her life withholding food and water living on a skilled nursing unit where care was superb. I will never comprehend their lacking of empathy while advertising their regret her life was concluding.
So huge
then to witness a more open and sophisticated ability to embrace the situation and cope ..and admiration for Kate’s proactive and loving contributions.
Caring for a loved one with Dementia is such a long, slow grieving process.. some days you are so busy with the tasks, there’s just no time to rest and absorb, and grieve. Kate is a gift! Thank you Kate for loving your mom (and your dad!) in such a special way.
Beautiful Kate! Looks so much like precious Heather. Blessings to you all.
Your daughter is amazing, I have a daughter who is similar. She is helping me so much. Thank goodness for our girls.
I so wish my father and brother were able to talk so openly about my mother's dementia like this incredible family. 🙏
A beautiful interaction between dad and daughter, on such a personal topic.
Thanks, Kate. You're wise, smart and fun.
A beautiful interview. I did a double take I thought it was Heather. Kate you expressed yourself so well. Your Mum and Dad so appreciative of you.
Your daughter is lovely in every way, you are so fortunate to have such a loving family!
Wow, what a great daughter. She is so articulate and comes across as such a good person. Extremely likable in this video.
What a wonderful support system, you and Heather have. ❤❤❤❤
Wow she definitely looks like Heather absolutely beautiful.. She even laughs like her..John it’s so nice too see the daughter involved with helping.. Kids these days are all selfish with just all about them.. Kiddos
You two are so sweet and adorable together. Thanks for sharing.
What a lovely young lady! How wonderful to see the love among the members of your family.
Thanks! buddy, for shearing amazing videos...;-)🙏
What a great daughter. Wonderful that she is so great with her momma❤
Lovely to "meet" Kate. What a lovely young woman who clearly moves through life with love and devotion. That apple didn't fall far from the tree, Dad. 🌳🍎
What a great daughter you & Heather raised!
Your daughter is a year older than me. What a blessing she seems
Wow what a tremendous blessing u & Heather have for a daughter! 🥰 And being a nurse too is great addition. Kate thx for sharing & being such a wonderful daughter for your parents & showing genuine love in action. Rare gem these days. Take care & God bless! 🌸🌺🌸
Thank you. It’s nice to hear a relatable conversation, from one daughter to another. What a blessing it is to have family support. Way she goes 💜
My dad had my mom at home with dementia (she passed 2 weeks before my dad was going to tour assisted living for them) and benefited greatly From a caregiver class. When I helped her with showering and dressing, she would say I can’t believe I have to have you help me with this and I matter of factly, you helped me for years I can help you once and a while, and she said ok.
Wonderful daughter! ❤
You have a wonderful family, thank you to Kate for a daughter's perspective. Much appreciated. The support you give one another is obvious, and so wonderful to see. A million thanks!
She is an astounding young woman 💪🫶
Very special people, indeed! 💞🪴✨
John, God is with you. He will never leave you nor forsake you. Stand on this promise, God is faithful. He will provide all that you need to get through this. Thank God for Kate. Such a blessing.
Great teamwork. Sending love and prayers 🩷
It is so good hearing Kate's experiences with her Mom. Thank you for sharing!
Lovely meeting you and Heather’s daughter. It’s so important to have these conversations. You can see how she was raised with wonderful parents. 💕💕💕
You’re so lucky to have a daughter that is so loving and involved. I have three kids (two daughters)…and the oldest won’t have anything to do with me. I do not know why. We are a whole new category of parents…now called “Estranged Parents”, and there are hundreds of thousands of us. So hold her tight and give her all the love I can’t give my daughter…
Nice; thanks to both of you for opening up.
I just loved listening to you and your daughter discussing the importance of family and the time Kate is spending with her mom. Great video 🙏❤️
Such a sweet family, and sooo much support!❤
I’m so happy you have a helpful daughter. God bless you both.❤
You have a lovely daughter!
It is bittersweet.
Lovely.
Kate, in her way your mom is teaching you patience, compassion and unconditional love for when you have a family. You have a remarkable supportive family .
I lost my father to dementia, he had no idea who I was as the end . 😢. Stay strong
That’s beautiful way to put it.
How lovely to hear your story tonight .. Sending all of you love from England
Wonderful, loving daughter!
She’s just amazing… She’s my rock.
You are blessed to have Kate so close by to help and to be able to spend time with Heather.
Hello Kate. Good to meet you.
Great conversation. Bless you both ❤
What an awesome daughter you have! It's hard to say you are lucky since Heather is going through such a horrible illness but you have a wonderful family and support system with your daughter and sister.
What a smart, insightful young woman you and Heather have! 👍🏼♥️🇨🇦
Great conversation, love between you, Kate and Heather is undeniable! She is one special gal! But look at her parents! Hard grieving while loved one is failing, but it’s because we love so hard! You both are kind and caring! Heathers smile and charisma is always shining through! She knows that she is well cared for. Keep up the amazing work!
So beautiful ❤❤❤❤
Such a beautiful daughter and such a beautiful relationship that she has with mom and a strengthening relationship with you also dad. We understand as dementia is on my husband's side and we have seen his mom and sister live with this. May God continue to strengthen you all for each day ahead.
With love, Mari from Alabama
It takes a village. What a beautiful family. Kate, you are an angel!!!
Very well spoken
Wow! Thank you for including the details like when H took initiative on her own. So interesting and inspiring to learn how behavior changes all the time. May alll beings be healthy, happy, and at peace.
So glad you have each other in this hard situation. A wonderful loving and supporting family. ❣
It was so nice to meet Kate. You both are loving people and you will give each other the love and support you both need.
My heart goes out to you. ❤
Kate, wow, you are very impressive. What a compassionate heart you have.
so glad you each have each other. 😊
This is a wonderful video, talking a bit about the "behind the scenes." Kate is a big help, John, you are a wonderful husband. With the support of Kate's husband, your family is a beautiful team all in for Heather. We're thinking of you from Akron, Ohio, USA.
I don't know Kate or Heather (or your son) as well as I know you John but I always had the perception your family are a bunch of cool, kind people. I'm glad you all have each other.
@@Petitephysiquebarre yes they are all amazing loving and supportive. I’m so lucky! ❤️
John .....Your not alone ♥️🎗
Aw Kate : ) ... You're a Sweet-Heart !! ~ I'm soooo glad to hear You ''speak to'' - grieving in the 'here & now' - yes, it's so Important that people [like u said / eluded to] start to ''feel'' it now & [if possible] ''not'' bottle it all up : (
In closing, Thank-you for being such a Great & Caring daughter as well as a Super support to your Father during this journey for him as well ! All the Best & again, Thank-you for sharing your thoughts, perspective, feelings ...
Family support ❤
Praying it works out for all.❤
That was beautiful John. So much love.. You and Cate and Heather and your son as well. All so lucky to have one another to lean on through this journey. 💔
She is so adorable. Best luck to you all! 🙏❤️🌻
Great routine , we got one of those battery operated animal nail file things and took the guard off to do Mums nails. She had the hardest nails, the lady who came to do pedicures said there was no doubt her calcium was at a good level.
It might be helpful to join a support group or find a therapist to help with what will come, caregivers need care too and it’s important for both of you to maintain your mental health. Take care and be well, you’re both doing the best possible for Heather. 🥰🙋🏼♀️
Your daughter is saying what I feel about my mom. My mom (Parkinson’s) is in the stage where she knows how she is struggling and I am trying to balance acceptance and trying to get her to do as much as she can. It’s sad and frustrating and I am totally not in control of the situation.
So nice to have met your daughter. What a great family! ♥️. You all are very blessed 💕
I love Kate's attitude of "this is just life." I'm going through some horrendous health stuff and very early on, I found that it was better to accept it. As soon as I did that a weight was lifted.
These videos are both inspiring and heart breaking. Thank you for sharing your journey.
Really nice to meet your daughter and hear her perspective on her Mom and how she handles what is happening. I've often heard memory/dementia journeys described as 'the long goodbye', which is very accurate.
Your family is always in my prayers! The hardest part for me with my father's dementia was when he had to be put in a nursing facility and I had had a very hard day working with a difficult individual. I had always leaned on my father and his advice and talked over the issues I was having in my life. I went to see him, and just broke down in tears because when talking to him because he started as if he was trying to talk back and he had tears in his eyes and was making crying noises, I just clasped his hand and started telling him everything was going to be fine. He had a big smile come across his face as if he understood. I miss him so much, such a great and loving father!
Congratulations on 10.000 subscribers.
@@user-tf9bm5su7z thank you, I’m just amazed! I had no inkling that my channel would takeoff like this, and it speaks volumes about how good people are, with an appetite for empathy based content. It really warms my heart.
Bless you for what you have done and do..I lost my mom..she was 92..And our ending wasn't a pleasant one..Mom, her sundowning...her paranoia, she got mean and nasty..It was the hardest thing..and I've worked as an aid..and LPN...so Bless you both .because I know how challenging it is for anyone going through this..
You are blessed to have a strong family unit. Talking, sharing, crying and making strong memories together binds your family unit and will carry you through. Letting go is the hardest part of loving someone and you all clearly love Heather with every fibre you all have. God bless you all ❤
You’re really blessed to have both a good network of friends and family to help you through the process of helping Heather out. Bless them all.
This is exactly our home I do this for my mom we are very blessed to have a caregiver, almost every day to do the morning shower routine. Everything that you guys talked about dealing with routine, is absolutely crucial. It's so wonderful to know that one is not alone in this journey
❤❤❤❤❤
Kate is a wonderful daughter and you guys are an amazing family! Much love ❤
I'm so grateful for Heather she's surrounded by a strong and loving family. I understand your daughter's sadness of losing her mom slowly. But it's also a gift she's spending that time with her. It's very touching. I guess you need a good cry about the situation. All my respect and love for the hard but loving task you've been giving. Life is unpredictable but you manage to handle it. You have a great family, John. Heather's condition is heartbreaking but at least she's at home. ❤
Thank you Kate and thank you John. You are caring for Heather, and loving her. I just saw another video where the husband cannot do it anymore. No judgement, but it was so sad to see. Not every spouse can do what you are doing. Keeping Heather at home for as long as you can. God Bless you. I hope my husband can do the caring if I should come down with a memory disease. I know I could do it for him
Thank you for sharing your caregiving. Your daughter Kate is a treasure.
🙏❤️🙏
Such a healthy father/daughter conversation 🕊💜
What a great daughter!
She is so beautiful and I love that she is there for you!
She is the real deal. Im so glad you have her!
Nice interview and it gives us a glimpse into the old Heather, I am sure she was just like Kate, same loving caring person. Glad to hear she seems to be doing a little better at the moment.
Glad you enjoyed it!
Ok, this brought tears to my eyes. I've gone thru this with my mom. The precious relationship you two have will definitely be even stronger in the years to come because of this shared journey. When you are in the midst of the journey, sometimes it is hard to see the precious memories that you will hold onto the rest of your lives. I'm so thankful for both of my dear parents. Your communication is so important. Hugs to you both. 💞
Thank you so much!
Glad you have your daughter’s help and support!
Thank you for thanking your daughter. Those are words I won’t get to hear because my dad is gone. But given it wasn’t the first time he had me home to care for “your mother” I can’t imagine I wouldn’t be here to walk her home. ❤ Thanks Kate for being brave and sharing the hard stuff with us.
Heather is so blessed to have her dear family by her side, caring for her like they are. Let's keep the van Gurps in our prayers. "May God bless Heather, John, Kate and aunt Hetty and all those who interact with Heather, in Jesus name, Amen!"
Very touching chat,so natural,no masks,so understanding and most of all,connection in this family is palpable.You are all tightly together in this and you have got time to save every minute of this process for memory bank.Heart warming to watch and listen you two.
Kate, you are the best. We care about your parents and worry that your father has been overwhelmed. Knowing that you are there to support him is so comforting. Take care of yourself. John, you and Heather raised a wonderful daughter. Stay strong, John. You are not alone. 👊
It’s so easy to see that your family is steeped in love and acceptance. It is also clear that these characteristics are not new, but have grown through the span of your family. Again, thanks for sharing your experiences.