Cut These Words to Instantly Improve Your Writing
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 14 ก.ค. 2024
- Want to immediately make your writing sound more polished and professional? Start cutting unnecessary words. Today, I’m going over five types of words you should cut from your novel to instantly tighten up your writing and make every line pop on the page.
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MORE WRITING AND PUBLISHING ADVICE:
3 Ways to INSTANTLY Elevate Your Writing: • 3 Ways to INSTANTLY El...
Weak Writing to Banish From Your Manuscript: • Weak Writing to Banish...
Worst Amateur Writing Mistakes (With Examples!): • Worst Amateur Writing ...
5 TYPES OF WORDS TO CUT FROM YOUR MANUSCRIPT:
01:15 - Filter words
02:55 - Words indicating passive voice
03:56 - Weak or unnecessary adverbs
05:55 - Excessive dialogue tags
07:20 - Pet words and phrases
ABOUT ME:
My name is Alyssa Matesic, and I’m a professional book editor with nearly a decade of book publishing and editorial experience. Throughout my career, I’ve held editorial roles across both sides of the publishing industry: Big Five publishing houses and literary agencies. The goal of this channel is to help writers throughout the book writing journey-whether you're working on your manuscript or you're looking for publishing advice.
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Word of warning about backups, if you are thinking you can just go and find and replace all these words, make sure you take a copy of the work before you do so and that you set find and replace to 'replace exact word'
I do sometimes use the extra words (really, definitely, etc) in a particular character’s dialogue to portray their personality.
Definitely allowed in dialogue (IMO) as that's how people actually speak. And people also end words with prepositions when our English teachers told us it's not appropriate. But in my dialogue I allow it lol
@@Jus-X Agreed that dialogue should match how people speak. But there's nothing wrong with ending a sentence in a preposition, in dialogue or not. To quote Strunk: "English grammar isn’t something to mess with".
Tip for the dialogue tags "he said," "she said," etc.: If the line of dialogue stands alone as a paragraph, don't use them. In a paragraph with multiple lines of dialogue, use the tags as pauses or space for the character to breathe. For example:
"You should've told me you were leaving for the store," she said. "I would've added milk to the list." You can also use an action beat between the lines of dialogue or after a single line of dialogue.
'Weasel words' are another one to look out for: just, already, seems, even etc etc....
Good call,
This is a common mistake with beginning writers. "There seemed to be a lot of people in the room." It's okay, you can make a judgment! No need for "seemed to be".
@@toweypat I'm even weaseling them out of my own novel as we speak, apparently, they just seem to be everywhere now!
I'm sharply relieved I'm not the only one who calls character movements "choreography".
Also I think I'm most guilty of the pet phrases. The others though not that much.
@VeraBrightfeather Blocking is actually a pretty cool alternative. It's just unfortunate social media has attached a different meaning to that word.
Very helpful. I think my favorite pet word is "just". She just loved what he just told her and just couldn't wait to just get him back just once.
Having watched several of your videos I have learnt a lot, but have also got a bit of a confidence boost since many of these tips have come to me "naturally" while writing/revising my own work. It's exciting! Your videos are great!
I hear ya!! I been writing since I was 5 and over the years I can see how much my writing has matured. Mercy me, I still have room to improve but Alyssa’s videos make me excited to reach out to a publisher. Waiting on a few things to fall into place, then I’m going for it. 🤞
Working on my first novel and your videos are so helpful and encouraging.
I'm so glad you find my videos helpful! Thanks for commenting, and best of luck with your first novel!
Good luck!
@@AlyssaMatesic
I am writing a murder mystery series based on the 12 days of Christmas. At first it seems like all of these books are separate but by the end the detective get anonymously invited to a house where they meet the other detectives to solve a murder that was ruled an accident. In each book I want the respective detective to find one element that will help solve the group mystery in the final book.
*Question:* what are 12 elements that I can have the detectives find out to solve the group mystery? (I already have: the suspect, victims name, murder weapon, location of murder, time of murder, & alibi)
Thanx Alyssa!
Great advice. I always read and revise over and over as I write, catching a lot of what you listed. Your list, however, provides clarity, so when I continue editing, I can make sure I know what I’m looking for. I think a good word is streamline. It allows the reader to move through the words and get more involved. Thanks for your help.
Thank you I needed that
Thanks for the advice.
Great list! When I get back to editing, I will rewatch. Have a great weekend/week.
Great reminders Alyssa. Much thanks.
This is really good advice.
This was good advice - thank you!
Immensely insightful, thank you
Thank you Alyssa, for always the amazing tips!
Wow, what an informative video! This makes the writing easier to tackle. Thank you for your tips! This was super helpful. Thank you 😊
So glad it was helpful! Thanks for commenting :)
Thank you for your interesting presentation
nice tips! ❤ it’s useful for many types of writing, not just novels
I've become so aware of cutting the story to the bone, by deleting unnecessary words, lol. 😊
All very good advices that was given here, I said.
Passive voice tends to fill my first draft. I'm ready to fix it up when I work on rewriting.
We can never hear this advice enough! Especially with filter words. I do this too often, and I'm going to be more aware of it during editing.
Excellent advice as always, Alyssa! I know that I made a LOT of these mistakes early on in my current WIP. Fortunately, I had someone reviewing my work as I wrote, so I slowly got better over time. I know that pet phrases in particular are something I've become a lot more aware of and better at recognizing as I write. Working with someone who can identify those sorts of things and help you break some bad habits early on goes a long way in helping to continually improve through the process (and hopefully save some of the editing headache)!
Guilty. Great resource, thanks.
One way I try to get around passive voice is by replacing "was" with a different verb. Example from Draft 1 of my manuscript: "Still covered in “Protector” garb, she noticed Austin was sprawled on his right side." My final draft I'm trying to query reads: "Still covered in “Protector” garb, Austin lay sprawled on his right side." For anyone struggling with passive voice, I hope this helps.
Good advice. Thank you.
Who is covered in Protector garb? Your second revision is less clear. You still need "she noticed" because otherwise it seems like Austin is the one covered in protector garb. So, might I suggest "Still covered in Protector garb, she noticed Austin lying sprawled on his (right) side." (is specifying right necessary?). Or if Austin is the one covered, then put the dependent clause at the end. "Austin lay sprawled on his right side, still covered in Protector garb."
Also, the first dependent clause (from the context given) doesn't seem relevant to the rest of the sentence? Generally complex sentences are best used for enjamming things not within the scene itself like feelings, metaphors, or extra information.
@@ye_zus I’m sure that question is answered through the context already contained in the larger scene.
@@briankilgore8808 yes definitely, but the point still stands. I can only go on the two sentences presented and the meaning between them has changed. By removing "she noticed" the attribution of "the person in garb" has shifted from her to Austin. If that was the intention that's good. Just pointing it out
@@ye_zus you don’t think that’s a bit hypercritical? Unnecessarily so? They were giving a minor example, and you had to complain.
Excellent! Filter words are my Achilles heel. Gotta do a keyword search on my manuscript and clean house.
This was just what I needed right now. I am in the middle of editing and will return to this video later in the process.
I'm glad you found it helpful - good luck with your edits!
When I edit my manuscript, my first step is to go through my Just Look Like That list - it includes the examples you cited (save for 'to be' iterations which I go after in the listen through), unneeded directional words (I'm bad about up and down - if a character sits or stands, it's obvious which direction, among other ways I overuse them).
Another thing I noticed is dialogue tags stand out more in audiobooks. I try to pare these down during the listen through, where they stand out.
This video is really helpful. Of the several points that hit home, the very first cut me to the heart. Filter words. I will revise again, lol. I appreciate your insights.
So glad it was helpful! Good luck with your revisions!
@@AlyssaMatesic thank you for saying this. You’re the best.
OH BOY, I have a feeling I will be getting this in my feedback section this week lololololol. THANK YOU ALYSSA!
Caught me in the act of over using dialogue tags, lmao. The advice is still very helpful, and I love knowing about "choreography" as an alternative tag for my writing. :))
I’d love if you did page one review videos.
This came at the right time. I’m editing my manuscript after a huge revision from my beta reader’s feedback. 😊
Great advice. Stephen King wrote that “the road to hell is paved with adverbs”. It takes a lot for me to clean them up in my manuscript because I use them a lot in my daily conversations, but it’s important. All of these are spot on.
Could you make a video about social media for authors or editors? Like how do you create and manage an account as an author? What kind of content should authors post? Is it necessary for authors to have social media? I want to be an editor one day. But I also like to write a bit. Also, thanks for the videos!
Geeat advice! Occasionally, I'll use a filter word to remind the reader whose POV we're in if the chapter includes several characters talking (e g , she observed as he pressed every button on the control panel). That's an exception, though. Even then, it may not be needed. Or "She realized she forgot the keys." An altenative could be something like: She paused when she got to the door. She forgot the keys.
That could be shortened a little bit to "she paused at the door. She forgot the keys."
Even better!
1 - have heard all of this advice before, but as we say in my slavic culture, "Repetition is the mother of wisdom", and I appreciate the refreshing.
2 - the best way to re-run your manuscript is to finish it and let it rest and mature "in a drawer" for at least a week or a few, separate yourself from it. With that time distance taken, you will be able to re-read and edit it with a lot more clarity than you had when you wrote it.
good luck writer friends!
Thanks for your nuanced and informed approach to passive voice! One of my pet peeves is when people say that passive voice is always bad, or say that any form of "to be" is passive--totally missing that passive voice is always a two verb construction (a form of "to be" or "to get" + a past participle/"-ed" verb) and that if passive voice wasn't useful in English, the construction would just drop out of the language.
Learning all the appropriate uses for passive voice is a game-changer.
Passive Voice is great for flashbacks when the narrative is already in past tense. "Roxie remembered the day the Murphys died... It was a warm summer day-" and so on.
@@Jus-X It can be! Though, both the verbs in your example are in active voice--the "it was a day" clause is just using "day" to rename "it", which means the subject (it) is doing the action (was); passive voice typically either omits the subject, or puts it in a "by" clause (like "by zombies").
If we wanted to turn that first sentence into passive, it could be written "The day the Murpheys died by Roxie." That will get us the passive construction (a form of "to be" + an "-ed" verb--in this case "was"+"remembered) which is also signaled by the agent ("by Roxie") afterward to clarify who's remembering.
Passive voice is also a good tool to have when you're trying to improve cohesion on a sentence level--the ability to ensure the topic at the end of one sentence is next to the same topic at the beginning of the next sentence (even if that topic isn't the main subject of that sentence) can improve some sentence-to-sentence transitions a lot.
My pet clutter word is "seems."
Excellent advice. We're all guilty of many of these faux pas.
My writing was full of filter words and passive . It takes a lot of work to clean them out
Hi Alyssa, I have a question. If one was writing a series, kind of an epic. How would a developmental editor handle the first volume without knowing the rest of the story. As a new writer, Im concerned I might be looking forward too much. Secondly, the other volumes might have different themes. For example, one book might be a heroes journey type but the next volume might be totally different characters with a crime heist type theme.
Read William Strunk's The Elements Of Style.
That's a great one!
How many author's, or, how many manuscripts, do you work on over a year? Do you have an exclusive group of writers you collaborate with, or are you willing to take on a new voice? Also, are you exclusive to the genres you work in and, if so, would you consider branching into a genre you haven't done in the past? Thanks for all of the tips and videos.
I m listening to grammar worthy for publish. Every word counts, nothing else matters ... Filler phrases
I run my draft through Word Cloud and use the chart instead of the cloud. It lists every word in my draft from most used to least and reveals those words I overuse.
What a great idea! Thanks for sharing!
Question for #AskMeAnything - Do the Big Five publishers ever shy away from authors who have been published by small/independent publishers? Or does their interest actually increase? I suppose maybe the success of the published book(s) is a factor?
Some additional context, I am a horror writer thinking of writing a more extreme horror novel that might NOT be marketable to the Big Five. Wondering if getting this published through small press would later hurt my chances of getting Big Five-published with more marketable books.
I’m not sure if you’ve made a video about this before, but what is the difference between titles of editors in publishing? For instance, copy editor, developmental editor, etc. What is a literary agent?
I am guilty of all five, but I am learning through your helpful videos.
Thanks, Alyssa
I am having problems trying to download your Story Self-Assessment guide. I have signed up with my email but I can't find the correct link.
Can you help, please?
following as I have the same problem.
Hi there - please send me an email at hello@alyssamatesic.com and I will get the self-assessment to you!
I'm very guilty of this. Although not as bad as in the past. Prowritingaid has been very helpful on pointing them out but I try to avoid these adverbs and the word WAS as much as I can. My beta reader point these out as well and comes up with some very good suggestions. Also my editor manages to change sentences to something simpler.
How about just intentional, versus extremely intentional?
Is it passive speaking when using metaphors to immediately describe something that the character is experiencing or going through?
For example: “the blood in my mouth tasted like a bucket of old arcade tokens.”
Less is actually more. I literally realized that you should cut unnecessary words.
I need to watch this again, unfortunately. Did I just say unfortunately? (which is unfortunate?)
Instead of "The film disturbed me"- "The film was disturbing". I think it sounds better and make some more sense to me. Right?
Either one sounds fine to me? Don't overthink this.
First!
To me "The film disturbed me" is pretty clunky (and tell-y). It is verging on passive (what did the film do- tap me on the shoulder? No, it evoked a reaction in me, so "disturbed" is awkward, because actually "me" is the one whose physiology was impacted). As I reader I need to know why, and explaining is basically filtering too. at the risk of being wordy maybe use the chance to get into one or two of the senses, and tell some story... "my stomach twisted at the first gory scene, and I couldn't watch after that. Why did I always let Alyssa persuade me to watch these slasher flicks?"
One word that some authors use that I hate is "munch" as in; "he munched on his sandwich" or "she was munching her sandwich when the phone rang". It makes your character sound like a hamster. How about just writing that he/she was eating a sandwich?
Ha! You used the word 'vaguer' 🙈🙉🙊 sorry, just caught me off guard. But perhaps you were in active dialogue so it probably is ok🤔.
I agree with Alyssa 99% of the time but “he/she said” is an ‘invisible’ word to very experienced readers and it is better to use them than to risk knocking the reader out of the story by confusing them as to which character is speaking.
She covered that. She explained to use enough to avoid confusion, but to pull back when it's obvious or when "choreography" can do a better job.
NOTE: even an "under-writer" needs to delete excessive words. Go for clear, richly worded sentences and don't worry about word count.
By the same token, inserting random superfluous stock clips into a video (1:57, 6:11) adds fluff takes the viewer out and breaks the flow of the video.
For adverbs, I will use them to start sentences because otherwise it seems like most will start with 'She' or 'He' or a proper name. What's the best way to begin sentences without so many pronouns or proper names and cut unnecessary adverbs?
A few tips:
Try to see what sentences can be combined to avoid repetition. Example: "She picked up the glass. She walked over to the kitchen." To "She picked up the glass as she made her way to the kitchen."
You can also try to focus the beginning of the sentence on the action itself or a body part used to diversify how your sentences sound. Example: "She poured the wine into the glass. She took a sip." To "Her hand held the bottle steady as the wine filled the glass. Her lips met the rim as the dry flavor enveloped her."
You can have sentences here and there begin with a pronoun but if you want your sentences to sound more diverse, you can try this out.
Hope this helps!
Verbose - and often unnecessary - descriptions of 'everydayness' coupled with clumsy attempts at imagery doesn't improve a dull story ...
A whole page of fluff that means nothing
Am I losing my mind or is she extra beautiful in this video? 😮
Both could be true at the same time.
@@BooksForever But, according to Schroedinger, you will have to open the box first 😋
Yr Speech rate is like a billet train
Bone has no tongue na.
A little too overloaded so take a small topic and focus
Great advice and reminders. When I revise my drafts, I often focus on all of those things.