I was blessed(?) to have both ADHD and Autism; it made me more aware of my fidgeting and social issues from an early age, allowing me to take note of them and become actively aware of them. I continue to be quite aware of them, and each conversation is a tic-tac-toe game for me. I've been told that's not something that people normally have to do, but it comes with the territory of my brain, and I can use it to my advantage in every interaction. Some quickfire tips: - If you're fidgety, try and gesticulate more. Luke's doing it right here. Every time you want to move your hands or fidget, use them to accentuate your point. Don't use them aimlessly. - The silence and stillness: This is a constant struggle for me (for the obvious reasons I outlined above), but it can be done. It's a muscle I have to exercise every day, and I've been told it's a lot easier for others than me, but that doesn't mean I quit trying. If I can do it, everyone can. You just have to believe you can. - Hands stay *out* of your pockets. No matter what: It's a small thing, but the typical "hands in pockets" pose (you know the one) quickly marks you as someone that isn't open to talk or someone that's shady. I literally spent five years of my life refusing to let people see my hands unless I was actively working on something. This is problematic, don't do it. - If you *really* hate eye contact but want to improve your tolerance to it... get a customer service job. I've worked in customer service and retail roles for the past 7 years, and people genuinely get upset and short with you for not exercising good social skills or eye contact. Make the alternative (no eye contact) painfully uncomfortable. Sooner or later your brain is going to default to the easier of the two options (in this case, *maintaining* eye contact and social skills). Finally, since I'm on the topic of work... *don't* be that guy that's always upbeat and bubbly and positive for the sake of it. This is more of a personal peeve of mine, but I genuinely prefer authenticity over the over-the-top "I'm just so filled with gratitude for this minimum wage job" mentality. Please don't be like that, you're allowed to be a little miffed if something goes wrong. If you're having a bad day or aren't feeling well, say it. A lot more people care than you think, and it will earn you more social points than the alternative would. You're a person with faults and peeves and bad days, not a character; we are all people. This will earn you significantly more friendships in the long run, because you'll quickly learn when someone is having an *off* day and how to best interact with them (or if you should interact with them at all). Cheers.
@@JLM-y5g this comment is incredibly helpful and so fucking inspiring for me to see bro. All incredible points. Super on point with the fact that all of these are social muscles you have to train. You get better and it gets easier over time. Thank you for taking the time to share with the gang
This is so so true and valuable, especially when it comes to the thoughts that you make in your head like “oh they are not so cool ( this seems selfish but it does happen when you close your heart and give up to give a try, oh I would be a burden nobody wants to be with me”. I hope I can change soon… My past relationship, my appearance and the trauma in the past slowly shaped this insecurity and awkwardness in me, trapped me in my own prison. I know I’m a good person and open to making friends-I don’t want to be alone anymore, I don’t want to be a people pleaser in order to make friends anymore,… Hope I will feel better and hope we will all be happy
@@mannnxoxo if you’re watching content like this and have the drive to do it, I have no doubt you will get there man. Trauma can fuck you up for a while but the first step is recognizing it. Looks like you’re on your way to me :) keep me updated🤙
Dude I really needed this… I’m meeting someone for the first time this Wednesday- and I was like Oh shoot, what if I screw up or make a mistake… but if that happens oh well right? Ya live and ya learn. Thank you!!!
My biggest insecurity is my weight. I’ve always seen myself as an unattractive slob that no women would want. Not trying to garner a sob story just stating the truth of how I see myself. I started working out this year and have lost 65 lbs. Yet I still feel worthless. It doesn’t help being the most out of shape person in the gym cause I’m always tempted to compare myself. It’s something I’ve always struggled with and I hope to one day be the man I want to be. Thanks for the video bro.
@@BlueBEAZY45 thank you for sharing bro, that was really honest. A lot of people struggle to lose the weight in the first place because their self-image never changes as being someone who is overweight. 65 pounds is huge progress and nothing to play down, I hope you’re proud of that brother. Keep going.🤝
@@Luke_Grenoble Body Dysmorphia is definitely real and I’ll be even more honest that I’ve thought about ending things for years. But I know I would leave a wake of devastation behind by doing so. My family and friends would be absolutely devastated and therefore I’ve been more or less living for their sake for years. It’s a helluva predicament to be in but the saddest thing isn’t the suicidal thoughts but the fact I chose to have those thoughts. I chose to be overweight and hate myself. That’s the most damning thing about all of it. I am still responsible moving forward.
@@BlueBEAZY45 yessir body dysmorphia is a bitch. I’m sorry to hear you’re struggling brother, what’s helped me at my low points is to meet myself where I’m at. Get really consistent at the habits that make for great mental health starting at the lowest possible level to check that habit for the day, then building with time. While it’s true that often choices lead to mental state that also means that you have the power to change where you’re at. If you want any other resources or need anything from me bro, feel free to hit me up on Instagram @jlgrenoble
![CAMPปลิ้น | EP.83[1/2] เปิดแคมป์หลอนต้อนรับ 2 ตัวพ่อแห่งวงการผี!](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/2uPuHYHgwiI/mqdefault.jpg)
I was blessed(?) to have both ADHD and Autism; it made me more aware of my fidgeting and social issues from an early age, allowing me to take note of them and become actively aware of them. I continue to be quite aware of them, and each conversation is a tic-tac-toe game for me. I've been told that's not something that people normally have to do, but it comes with the territory of my brain, and I can use it to my advantage in every interaction.
Some quickfire tips:
- If you're fidgety, try and gesticulate more. Luke's doing it right here. Every time you want to move your hands or fidget, use them to accentuate your point. Don't use them aimlessly.
- The silence and stillness: This is a constant struggle for me (for the obvious reasons I outlined above), but it can be done. It's a muscle I have to exercise every day, and I've been told it's a lot easier for others than me, but that doesn't mean I quit trying. If I can do it, everyone can. You just have to believe you can.
- Hands stay *out* of your pockets. No matter what: It's a small thing, but the typical "hands in pockets" pose (you know the one) quickly marks you as someone that isn't open to talk or someone that's shady. I literally spent five years of my life refusing to let people see my hands unless I was actively working on something. This is problematic, don't do it.
- If you *really* hate eye contact but want to improve your tolerance to it... get a customer service job. I've worked in customer service and retail roles for the past 7 years, and people genuinely get upset and short with you for not exercising good social skills or eye contact. Make the alternative (no eye contact) painfully uncomfortable. Sooner or later your brain is going to default to the easier of the two options (in this case, *maintaining* eye contact and social skills).
Finally, since I'm on the topic of work... *don't* be that guy that's always upbeat and bubbly and positive for the sake of it. This is more of a personal peeve of mine, but I genuinely prefer authenticity over the over-the-top "I'm just so filled with gratitude for this minimum wage job" mentality. Please don't be like that, you're allowed to be a little miffed if something goes wrong.
If you're having a bad day or aren't feeling well, say it. A lot more people care than you think, and it will earn you more social points than the alternative would. You're a person with faults and peeves and bad days, not a character; we are all people. This will earn you significantly more friendships in the long run, because you'll quickly learn when someone is having an *off* day and how to best interact with them (or if you should interact with them at all).
Cheers.
I relate, I'm also acutely focused on how I'm perceived 😉
@@JLM-y5g this comment is incredibly helpful and so fucking inspiring for me to see bro. All incredible points. Super on point with the fact that all of these are social muscles you have to train. You get better and it gets easier over time. Thank you for taking the time to share with the gang
why do Americans always have like 4 doors in their room?
Dudeeee i thought the exact same thing
They are very important trust me 🙏
one of ems a closest door, the front door, the door that connects to the bathroom, and a secret fourth one.
@@CrispyOnionChannel I need a door to the room that stores all the spare doors
backrooms
Failure is always better than regret.
Having said that, this being some sort of granular rocket science speaks more of the state of society.
🌎🔥🔥🍿🍿🍿🍿
This is so so true and valuable, especially when it comes to the thoughts that you make in your head like “oh they are not so cool ( this seems selfish but it does happen when you close your heart and give up to give a try, oh I would be a burden nobody wants to be with me”. I hope I can change soon… My past relationship, my appearance and the trauma in the past slowly shaped this insecurity and awkwardness in me, trapped me in my own prison. I know I’m a good person and open to making friends-I don’t want to be alone anymore, I don’t want to be a people pleaser in order to make friends anymore,… Hope I will feel better and hope we will all be happy
@@mannnxoxo if you’re watching content like this and have the drive to do it, I have no doubt you will get there man. Trauma can fuck you up for a while but the first step is recognizing it. Looks like you’re on your way to me :) keep me updated🤙
Dude I really needed this… I’m meeting someone for the first time this Wednesday- and I was like Oh shoot, what if I screw up or make a mistake… but if that happens oh well right? Ya live and ya learn. Thank you!!!
@@hollycarfley5747 live and learn dude! Always take the lesson or the win. Good luck Holly
My biggest insecurity is my weight. I’ve always seen myself as an unattractive slob that no women would want. Not trying to garner a sob story just stating the truth of how I see myself. I started working out this year and have lost 65 lbs. Yet I still feel worthless. It doesn’t help being the most out of shape person in the gym cause I’m always tempted to compare myself. It’s something I’ve always struggled with and I hope to one day be the man I want to be. Thanks for the video bro.
@@BlueBEAZY45 thank you for sharing bro, that was really honest. A lot of people struggle to lose the weight in the first place because their self-image never changes as being someone who is overweight. 65 pounds is huge progress and nothing to play down, I hope you’re proud of that brother. Keep going.🤝
@@Luke_Grenoble Body Dysmorphia is definitely real and I’ll be even more honest that I’ve thought about ending things for years. But I know I would leave a wake of devastation behind by doing so. My family and friends would be absolutely devastated and therefore I’ve been more or less living for their sake for years. It’s a helluva predicament to be in but the saddest thing isn’t the suicidal thoughts but the fact I chose to have those thoughts. I chose to be overweight and hate myself. That’s the most damning thing about all of it. I am still responsible moving forward.
@@BlueBEAZY45 yessir body dysmorphia is a bitch. I’m sorry to hear you’re struggling brother, what’s helped me at my low points is to meet myself where I’m at. Get really consistent at the habits that make for great mental health starting at the lowest possible level to check that habit for the day, then building with time. While it’s true that often choices lead to mental state that also means that you have the power to change where you’re at. If you want any other resources or need anything from me bro, feel free to hit me up on Instagram @jlgrenoble
Wholesome glow-up.
so happy to see your channel growing!!
@@locovoox thank you, always love seeing your comments :)
bro ur content is valuable
@@FieldVivian you’re valuable ;)
Damn dude, you're so effortlessly charming lol. Would love to see a detailed video to achieve your charm. Love your voice btw.
@@divine_schizo thank you :) I’ve got a few on charm if you scroll back through my content, but I’ll keep that in mind for what I cook up next🤝
Im actually surprised your not popular yet
@@tranqilparade That’s very kind, we’re on our way brother💪
You’re = you are
"do what the alpha gorilla would do in this situation" lol. This guy cannot be real.
@@GreatPotato36 Hundo cent baby, go gorilla mode
King Luke has provided 🥪 👑
@@karasu_tengu14 bread for all🍞
How to voicemaxx bro
@@divine_schizo voicemaxx has me dead bro hahah I can definitely talk soon about some things I’ve done to speak better
You are not better than anyone and everyone else is not better than you.
@@mmc577 well said
hurry up n tell me foo
Failure is always better than regret.
Having said that, this being some sort of granular rocket science speaks more of the state of society.
🌎🔥🔥🍿🍿🍿🍿