INFLUENCER INSANITY EP 3 | "Sad Beige Moms" of TikTok prioritize aesthetics over child development
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 25 มิ.ย. 2024
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#tiktok #influencer #sadbeigemoms
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CHAPTERS
0:00 Intro & Background
3:20 Factor Sponsorship
5:10 Why do I care?
11:01 Social media examples
23:10 Why “sad beige” exists
SOURCES MENTIONED IN THIS VIDEO:
About Montessori Education: amshq.org/About-Montessori#:~....
The Influence of Colour on Memory Performance: A Review: www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/arti...
The Issue With Beige Parenting: www.meredithherald.com/post/o....
What Is ‘Sad Beige’ Parenting, And How Did We Get Here?: www.huffpost.com/entry/sad-be...
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So about those children who down through time wore natural fabric or whites etc. I hardly think they were hindered because of it. And actually they were more talented & smarter than our children are today. Now I personally have no skin in the game at all. But I have to say what is more concerning is the electronics programs music anything external that denies a child of learning without all the frame rates? I dont know who came up with the notions that flashing colors black & white contrast objects were going to increase a child potential but I call hogwash. I realize there is an entire industry built around children but as I stated earlier children from earlier times were smarter more talented than we see in our children who are indoctrinated into the world of electronics etc. I hate beige btw. Lastly making children fit into your world is not parenting..................Selfish entitled self absorbed bores....
@@illusionary5951 I agree with your points.
What is the best stimuli to children? Keep them close to parents and siblings! Not alone in the strollers. I highly recommend to read: Jean Liedloff's book - The Continuum Concept: In Search of Happiness Lost
I thought those wellness shots were the worst. Actually they should be the next ep in this series
little hero's
words spark interest and big topics are talked about, great work.
@@elbookish2912 lol damn, that was a very smooth call out. Sometimes we say and do things that are hypocritical and we need people to call us out.
I remember seeing a video of a goth mom where most of her house was black/dark colors, but she had the brightest, most colorful nursery/playroom so her kid could still get their fun toys and learn about colors and stuff.
that’s so cute 😭😭
I love goth baby! Her parents are doing it right.
Reby Hardy?? Her house is gorgeous. THe actual nursery is victorian gothic, but there's a hidden playroom behind a bookshelf that is SOOOOOO bright and fun and the baby clearly thrives in it
this was my life growing up. people sometimes didn't believe that I, a blonde girl during her pink princess phase, belonged to my goth mom. she said she loved going out with other goths and their kids, because the adults wore their fanciest dresses and people gave them strange looks, while the kids were colorful balls jumping around them, not even noticing that their parents were different. my room was a barbie wonderland, i can't imagine growing up only having addams family and tim burton merch..
@@jenksjax makes me think of the OG TV Addams family. The original Goth Family, with a "black" home but because it was shot in B&W the set was varying degrees of bright pink so that it looked black and grey on TV (black and grey didnt translate well on b&w grainy tiny sets) so your mum snd you were keeping up the very best of Addams Family Values!! Embracing the differences and being equally supportive of being all in black or all in pink!!
Putting spray paint on a child’s toy that they will probably put their mouth on is idiotic .
Yeah, like did we not learn from kids getting lead poisoning from eating chipped paint off their toys?
My thoughts exactly.
Worse than that, it's negligent.
Very
yup. comfortable with their kid eating spray paint flakes just for the sake of beige and internet points. so weird
I love that she cosplayed as a beige mom for this video. The slicked back hair, small gold earings, beige zip-up fleece. It's the details.
I was about 5mins into the video when I realized that! 😂
This!
Ya. That disappinted me in a way...
Came here to comment this!! 😂
@@unknownperson-qd1xt lmao what why
In about 25-30 years there will be a Netflix special featuring these kids talking about how gloomy and depressed the kids felt growing up. Also, how overbearing and abusive their mothers were because the kids feelings didn’t matter.
Oh definitely. These mums have no idea. I give my daughter all the choice of colours in the world and she's so happy.
And it will show those kids' homes as grownups and how they have decked them out over the top with bright colors 😅
@@TigerLilly4495 Right! In all the brightest rainbow colors! Their house is gonna look like a Lisa Frank painting.
It's proven that kids need colour to help their brain grow. Even in the pediatric ward, they tend to paint it with different colours and different pictures to make the baby's brain active. I think that these influencer parents should be educated on that and I'm glad Hannah finally spoke about it.
I think in about 10 years they will be on TikTok complaining about their childhood, just like the teens making TikToks about their Almond Moms xD
spraying toxic paint on your children's' toys, is a guarantee way to get that full Victorian era experience.
😂
And maybe a bowl of lead paint flakes on the side.
@@davidcox3076 "I should have saved some paint chips for Wednesday"
Lol bro said Victorian era experience 🤣🤣🤣
Well they certainly knew a thing or two about aesthetics that were... to die for😏
It's giving "I want a child but I want them to be exactly how I want them to be and to fit perfectly into the rest of my life how I want it" aka an accessory.
These people tend to also be 'mummy vloggers' so it makes perfect sense that they want a child as an accessory to show the masses and earn money from it, sadly.
Yep, that's what I get from it too. The sad beige moms are just the social media evolution of those parents who try to make their children a mini me.
This. I feel like these kids' lives are going to be stifled in so many ways, and not just color.
@@nicoler5713exactly. And the reason she only sees it in first time moms of babies and toddlers is that the children don't play ball and reality strikes their lives
exactly why i’m not going to have kids, i‘m just no the type for it and im not letting society and even my family pressure me into having one. i just finished two and a half years of therapy b/c my upbringing was just like you describe.. i was an accessory.
"Your home has the aesthetic of a dentists office and the comfort level of an airport lounge"
So the "official" Montessori books (Montessori Baby and Montessori Toddler) DO say: "Whenever possible, choose toys and containers for your children that are made from natural materials such as wooden toys and woven baskets." - I think the sad beige moms just heard "Natural materials" and said "OK. Brown wood stuff. Bet."
As a therapist, here is my two cents. It’s not the lack of color that is concerning to me, children will see colors everywhere else than home. It’s the importance that those moms give to perfection and projecting perfection. This has the potential to be extremely hurtful for the children long term. (Sorry if they are syntaxe mistakes, my first language is french 😊)
EDIT: I see some comments about de development of the eye. I just wanted to add that if those children only saw beige, of course, that would be a big problem. BUT, those children will see other colors. They will see different eye and hair colors, clothes of people visiting, mom’s or other visitor’s makeup, food they eat, colouring books and crayons, and they just have to look outside the window to see plenty of colors. They will also go outside and go at other people’s houses, etc. ❤️
Very well put! I know a little French and you did well
@@ketameanii ☺️ thank you!
Oui 😅 kids will learn colors from life anyway (seeing orange carrots and red cars ) it's more about always having the newest trending toy that's the issue and always photo perfect for social media
Exactly this.
This!!!
Don't have kids, don't have TikTok, and my poverty makes me immune to influencer culture. This series is fascinating.
😂 I share the same immunity… for the same reason
Not all kids are conceived with the mothers consent... Please REMEMBER that.... But you can switch the rooms around...you yourself having a neutral bedroom/office/bathroom...and the colours everywhere else...I did that ,with my 5 kids
“Don’t” was not an imperative. I’m sure they were saying “I” don’t have…
Seeing that they used “my” and “me”
And since we are being super concise now, I have kids but not tiktok or much money. There is where I personally identified with this comment. Absolutely hilarious.
God bless you mama.
Thinking poverty keeps you immune from influencer culture is a blindspot
I study psychology in Italy and I've had the chance to visit a montessori school, it is NOTHING like how the tiktok beige moms make it out to be. The classrooms had so many sensorial material and it was filled with bright colours alongside the neutral colours. There was a perfect balance.
People are using their children as accessories online. It’s insane to me. 🙄
It's giving "I want a child but don't want them to take up space" vibes. Child is an accessory in that case, not a separate being with their own likes, wants etc. Even my dog takes up more space with all the quirky toys he happens to like.
Spot on.
you nailed it!!!!!
What a fucking nightmare. It's UNREAL that mothers don't love their children. At all. They can't even muster to do the most basic things correctly. Selfish and absolutely disgusting.
Yes! It’s the definition of narcissism!
Right! Sometimes there's dog toys all over my floor lmao
so i grew up with a mom that wasn't sad beige but was equally strict about the aesthetics of the house. and, to put it shortly, i grew up feeling like i was not allowed to be a person. i was an accessory to the house, not a human. because my tastes were automatically insulted and dismissed, i still now as an adult struggle to develop ideas and tastes in a way that doesn't cause me anxiety.
I’m so sorry that was your experience-you should have been allowed to be your own person and develop your own style ❤ my partner had a similar experience and is rediscovering the joy of colors and self-expression. Wishing you all the best on your self-exploration journey!!
@@Anna-dd4rh thank you so much for your kind words!! i'm learning to develop my sense of self a bit more everyday so i think it'll be okay eventually :) i wish all the best to you and your partner as well!
Sorry for that. Your mom missed the best part of being a parent, how crazy creative a kiddo can be!
I’m so sorry. You are enough and matter. ❤
When I grew up my mom had orange carpet and a green refrigerator and I hated it. But I was just glad I had carpet and a refrigerator.
This also applies to parents who dress their children like small adults. Not even about the plain colors, but even the style & fits. It’s just so unnecessary. They’ll have all of their adult life to wear that, let them wear fun, colorful clothes. They’re gonna look back & cringe. I have a new appreciation for my Barney shoes that I loved as a child.
It's true. It's actually sad that as the children get older the clothing options available get less cute and colorful. I wear colorful clothing as an adult and it's nice when your child can look at your clothing and actually identify colors, not just dull, neutral tones.
The one thing I do like is that clothing isn't as gender conforming/extreme as it was before. My kid is 15 and she was a baby at the beginning of this change and it was annoying that the only clothing I could find was bright pink sequins, bows and ruffles. It was so limiting because she didn't like that stuff.. So I like that it's not as extreme now but I definitely disagree when parents won't let their kids express themselves or wear character clothing and instead make them wear boho muted adult clothing. It's weird because when I was a kid in the 90s, it wasn't that extreme like it was for my kid. In all of my photos, I was wearing jeans, Jean jackets, 101 dalmatian shirts.. At some point it all became extremely gaudy.
Yes, so true. The clothes my daugther is choosing are not stylish or chic. Do I sometimes prefer the cute little outfit I choose over the dress with a lot of glitter she chooses? Yes. Do I think she looks like a little raspberry because of all the pink? Yes. Am I asking myself if this elsa phase will ever pass? Also yes. But I am proud of her, that she already knows what she likes and what not. And as long as it is warm enough, she can choose.
But I have to say I am a little bit stricter with dressing up. Dressing up is something you play and she can do whenever there is time for. Getting ready in the morning is something different. So there are no fairy wings or princess dresses when we leave the house.
As a former baby, I can safely say I am all for color. I had a LOT of color around me. My parents didn’t care if the room matched at all. We always had colorful wall papers, sheets, toys, clothes, etc. and 30 years later I love colors!!
I literally think about how colors are so important for kids all the time just because I remember how much I LOVED seeing all the colors around me. I loved all my colored pencils and crayons, my rainbow guitar, my colorful unicorn baby blanket, etc. I even remember my dad found a little toddler-size activity table that someone was throwing away and brought it home and I remember that there was a spot of hot pink nail polish on it and it was my favorite part of the table! Haha
Then, I remember in college there was an internship at some orphanages in Romania and they explained how important colors are to the development of the children and it all made sense!
Former babies against sad beige mom trends ✊🏼✊🏼✊🏼😂😂
Morticia addams : “You have gone too far. You have married Fester, you have destroyed his spirit, you have taken him from us. All that I could forgive. But Debbie... pastels?”
This right here ^ exactly
I don't have a problem with pastels per se as they make vivid colour pastels which is nice and colourful. Like the 1950s inspired colorful kitchens. Are they still called pastels though? 🫣
😂😂😂😂👍
I like pastel too but for child really bother me😮
This is the BEST Comment!
Older mum here. No matter how expensive or aesthetically pleasing a baby product may be, children would rather play with the cardboard box they come in. 😂😂😂
so basically like cats. :D
That grounding feeling 😂 I get you
Oh yes! Lol my boy’s best toy was an Amazon box or empty containers 😂
Haha straight up facts!
I thought the same thing.
The genderfication of colors began in the mid 1900s when mass production of textiles made clothing more affordable. Priot to this, the norm was to treat all children slightly genderless in plain white dresses and let baby boys grow their hair. This was because of the high rate of infant mortality. Buying gender specific clothing wasnt a thing cuz it was just smarter to wait and see if they survive. This is why when you look at old baby photos, they always looked what we would consider feminine. To get mothers to buy more clothing, manufacturers began pushing pink and blue colors. This is the same tactic the fashion and textile industry has been using against us for centuries.
The sad beige moms are the moms who have kids for the ✨aesthetic✨ and to post them on instagram for clicks, not to genuinely grow a family. I feel sorry for those kids.
Aside from developmental issues, the beige mom trends concern me most because it is teaching children that nothing is theirs. Nothing really belongs to them. It sets a tone that a child’s interests or taste are not important if they do not fit mom’s aesthetic. I couldn’t imagine being a child and feeling like a guest in my own house or my own room.
My daughter has a giant rainbow in super bright colours above her bed. She chose the colours herself and the size of it and I spent days painting it for her. I don't love it, but it's her bedroom and she gets a say in it, we don't always agree on the way it looks, but I need to respect her likes and dislikes, as long as it's not harmful to her. She was 5 when she asked for the rainbow 🌈.
I was thinking along the same lines but specific to influencers. Their poor babies are going to grow up as decor items. So, not only guest in their own home, but object in the home. Just ew.
Very Ruby Franke
@@anaalves3658reminds me of when my 8 yo daughter asked for bright pink walls in the first home we purchased. We let her pick the color 😊
I wasn’t a sad beige baby but there was definitely some disdain over what I liked growing up. It’s worse than being a guest in your own home, it’s like being an intruder.
Another example of "classy if you're rich, trashy if you're poor"! I grew up in apartments, my parents were always afraid of not getting their security deposit back so I always had landlord special white/beige walls growing up. I HATED IT! I always dreamed of being able to paint my walls whatever color I wanted. We also didn't have money for "themed" decor but whatever we could get on sale which was often boring, solid neutrals. I laugh now at the beige moms because in the 90s/00s their aesthetic would've been seen as "poor" but now they're trying to hard to signal "rich".
Same, my mom once told me not to draw on the walls in my room so i drew on the walls in my closet because its not technically my room. And then when she finally got a house she kept the pink-beige walls as well as the dark panneled walls because she was afraid it wouldn't sell even though she's not selling any time soon. She only unclenched about my choice of green and blue when she saw it was color of the year and that lighter greens are calming.
yes my mom didnt even let me put up posters on my wall because she was scared the tape would remove the paint.
what they dont realize is that it still makes them look poor. like idk who told them that a spray-painted toy basketball hoop looks 'aesthetic' and not like they picked it up off someone's front lawn. that wouldnt be a problem for normal humans but i think these people would have a mental breakdown if they knew how this looked lmao
@@Imbatmn57 "unclenched about my choice"🤣
For me it's opposite.
As a kid I disliked those obnoxious , chuncky toys. With loud colors. I always preferred more calming, cute , sleek, sophisticated and intricate designs like adults had.
But unfortunately kids toys and accessories are all about being loud and on your face.
So I am not much concerned with kids not seeing colors bcs it's also adults who decided kids love obnoxious things and flooded everything with that mentality.
When in reality every kids can be different like I was.
Some kids might end up liking the calm and serene look of Beige so it entirely depends on kid. Hence, no worries that they can't see colors and it's not stimulating enough.
However what concerns me about these sad baige moms is whether they will let the kids be themselves and not enforce their preference over them.
Their obsession of being perfect can be very toxic towards their kids if they had very different taste.
Acklowledging that you're terrible doesn't improve your case by the way. They admit that they are sad beige moms to preempt any criticism - it's a rhetorical strategy. But it doesn't change the fact that they hinder their children's development.
I normally dont respond to videos, but i really wanna say how much I admire the fact that you not just 'bash' the videos, but actually come with good, well-rounded arguments why it's a questionable situation. I really enjoyed the scientific explanations you got from your studies!
Not sure what they are thinking. “I’m worried about toxins, so I’m going to spray paint all my kid’s plastic toys.” I wonder if the spray paint manufacturers have any warnings on the cans to discourage this behavior.
I get buying the beige items but when they spray painted the naturally colorful toy into beige I felt so pissed like WHAT ARE YOU DOING ISN'T PAINT TOXIC?! I wasn't allowed to be in a room that was recently painted that was my bedroom and the place smelled like paint for a week, how could she just let her kid play and breath in the freshly wet spray painted hoop?
That was honestly the primary concern for me. Even the special plastic formula spray paint will come off. It's designed for outdoor furniture, not kids toys.
If their kid got sick after eating this spray paint, who are they going to sue? The paint manufacturer? If so, then pretty soon we might see: "not suitable for making kids' toys sadder" warning on the can.
Right? How has she not heard of the bad things that happened to kids in the past with eating paint chips?
i have some here and there is a "suitable for toys di 71-3" label on it. my guess is there are different ones?
wouldn't all that spray paint on the sad christmas tree be very TOXIC? 😮 The original product, aside from being more visually stimulating, was specifically designed to be baby proof in terms of safe materials. This is beyond idiotic
Yes, it 1000% is. They WILL consume chips of the paint. There’s a reason us car painters have to take so many safety measures when working with paint in any way.
Absolutely! I wouldn't use spray paint on anything for my pets and they give it to their babies.
yep, as a plastics engineer this made me physically uncomfortable. Stop spray painting children's toys!!! Also wouldn't recommend doing this indoors and with no personal protective equipment, maybe they've done that once too often..
Honest answer? It's made of plastic. By definition it is not safe, lol. If you want a safe version, use a real tree or a toy-tree made of real wood. That's it.
Yeah she literally says in the original video that only a little bit of the paint chipped but it was okay cause she fixed it and that's like immediately after painting
There is no way that spraypaint DIY isnt sticky, the mom didnt even read how to spraypaint and just layered ot on from 4 inches away :') poor kiddo
The description of a sad beige kindergartener in a classroom for the 1st time is literally how I, as an autistic person, felt in a classroom growing up. These parents are going to end up creating autistic symptoms in their kids that they shouldn't have to deal with, and I wouldn't wish on anyone.
The biggest issue isn’t so much the “lack” of color but the fact that these moms basically view their kid and motherhood overall as an accessory for social media clout. This can very much enter territory of control and abuse in the future where the kid will be expected to fit into mom’s aesthetic
imagine having the only kid in kindergarten that can differentiate ecru, eggshell, buff titanium, almond, etc!!
@@pupawupagusbut they won’t because they will only be able to see bright colours until they are 4+
They just will live n a sad monochrome world.
@@dianeshelton9592 usually kids are at least five before kindergarten, no? listen lady, don’t crush mothers’ dreams ok
Bruh…
@@pupawupagus what your dream is to live in a beige home which deprives any child of the needed physical stimulation. I sure as hell want to destroy that dream. A child’s needs always come first especially over a dream to follow a certain aesthetic. How shallow self absorbed do you have to be to have that as a dream. Yuk!
As a car painter what grinds my gears the most is the spray painting everything without any research about what’s safe and when. You CANNOT use toxic paint on unprepared baby/toddler toys that WILL end up in their mouths, making them ingest harmful chemicals.
EDIT: thank you for acknowledging the danger of it all, omg. Just cause a bottle says „sticks to plastic“ it literally means nothing. Some plastics aren’t even able to be painted in a way that’ll last for a long time…
It really goes to show how tunnel visioned into the aesthetic she was. Having a good surface is like spray paint 101.
Won't spray paint even degrade some plastics? That's great for your kid.
My house is a minefield of toys and the walls are plastered with my kids artwork everywhere and I just couldn't imagine telling my kids "no i can't put that picture you made on the wall because it doesnt match my aesthetic" My aesthetic is whatever the heck they want.
As an ecec educator myself, this is also what worries me. I remember hearing/reading about an study of how Covid effected childrens emotional development and creative play. Because everyone, especially adults, needed to wear masks, it showed how kids later (mostly those born right before pandemic) had difficulty recognizing different emotions, since there was no grown up to show example. So those emotions didn't show in their play or if they did, kids found it hard to connect the expression to the emotion/voice.
I cannot imagine other difficulties this can cause to children by not allowing them to get access to colours and 'wild' environment. Parents are worried about adhd, autims extr. that they think cooling everything down helps their kids and prevents what they fear for the most. But as you said on the video, world is 't as call as sad-beigde-moms fantasy and I bet it can cause anxiety and overstimulations for kids who grew up in over lame surroundings.
"beige toys are just calming, clean, and nontoxic" *sprays rainbow toys with TOXIC beige spray paint*
We call them depressing whats more fun then a kids room with blue red yellow green pink purple etc 😊
@ren.x - well said! The toxic spray paint, peeling off the plastic tree was disconcerting
And sprays toxic paint in the environment. i know, americans don´t give a sh*t about nature -.-
if plastic toys (surface) were toxic, there would be a scandal and they wouldn't be around for so many decades.
this whole "plastic is toxic, wood isn't" debate is laughable, especially since wood can have a toxic layer, too.
@@alliwhite3941 i think a lot of these ultra beige parents have a bad habit of forgetting that they themselves were once kids who most likely played with plastic toys...and they came out "fine". i'm more worried about plastic toys being more harmful for the environment than "toxic" tbh
I grew up in one of those boring beige homes back in the 90s and let me tell you, I inherited my childhood home and I put every color you can think of in my home. I HATE beige and neutrals aside from black. The more color the better.
You are my spiritual buddy with the whole "give me all the colors" thing. I'm an illustrator and colorist for a living and I SURROUND myself with vibrant color. Color makes you happy! And black makes colors pop even more!
When I sell my work at trade shows and such, every display tool in my booth is either silver or black because not only does it drive attention to my work, it makes the vibrant color in my work pop even more, like I already said.
I hate this beige trend with the fire of a thousand suns. 🤮
Yeah, my mom turned our (mine and sister's) bedroom beige, I moved to living room and ruined my back sleeping on couch 💀
Same! My mother's place is all white, beige and bleached wood. I hated (and still hate) it with a passion.
At sixteen, she finally allowed me to choose the paint for my room's walls, and I chose vivid crimson. Needless to say, she wasn't happy about it, and repainted the walls as soon as I moved out at 18.
Now, at 32, I look like a clown and my apartment is my circus. I NEED all the colors of the rainbow all the damn time.
I'm willing to bet that many of those poor kids will also hate beige and their childhood homes.
I have so many colors too. I can't stand the beige life. It looks super depressing to me.
I should have read your comment before leaving my own, I feel the same - all of the colors now, please.
I honestly noticed this trend start right after Kim Kardashian showed her home that had literally nothing and all beige or white, but even then she showed her kids rooms and playrooms and they had so much color.
my parents LOVED hanging our artwork around the house while we were growing up, there was always colour in our house as well as in our wardrobes. my siblings and i were allowed to be whoever we wanted and we would have felt stifled if we weren't allowed colour. I feel bad for these children.
None of these mothers have a clue about eyesight development and its saddening. Babies need strong, bright contrastinf colours because newborns cannot see nuanced colour gradients. And they need to experience colour for brain development.
(Or the fact that humans will become psychotic if deprived of all greens. No, really. NASA did research on the need of plants in your environment (if not needed for food). And people will experience psychosis if deprived of all plants for a prolonged period of time. Green colours are soothing to our brains. Colours impact our psychology. Even of tiny babies)
Yes! Love your comment. Thank you for stating so well exactly what my old brain was thinking. Grandma and mama of many here. Our eyes and brains naturally crave the colors of our beautiful world. 🌎 🌲🌾🍄🌼🌿🌈🍇🏕️
@@Weissguys6 i'm a millenial m9m myself: my son is 2 and our daughter is due april/may. We got bombarded with the sad beige, and it's actually hard to find affordable baby clothes of good quality that aren't muted colours or shades of beige and grey. It's rather frustrating.
I'm all for usinf natural materials (we try to keep plastic to a minimum ourselves, as wood is also often nore durable) but absolutely go for colour. Parenting is all about your child's needs over your wants. Children need colour
Thisssss
I just.. most “sad beige moms” have a lot of plants in their house so idk about this.
@@jordanlunsford9214 the plant thing was an example on how colour affects our psyche. Not that they don't have any plants at all.
We have different but similarly strong psychological ties to other colours as well
That lady spray painting kids toys made me feel so uneasy. Toy companies work hard to make these baby toys safe to put into mouth and this tiktok lady just destroyed them with paint that is propably not healthy to consume... I hope it was just a ragebait video and her babies didn't play with that.
As an older first-time mom (have 2 babies in my 40s) it’s my observation that these promos are geared towards moms that are young and vulnerable.
I love saying this, my mom has a beige and earthy color house with vintage decor, but my room is not even close to being beige. I just painted it purple, I have a lot of plushies and a lot of pink and childish decor because this is what makes me happy and my room is my own house with my own aesthetic and my mom is absolutely ok with it. (I'm 17 btw) My sister has her own room, and it is also purple with all the decoration she wants (it is full of kuromi stuff cuz she loves her) and my mom doesnt say anything about it, as long as it is clean it is totally fine (She is 8). My baby brother yet doesnt have a room but he does have a place for his toys, which is a big corner in the living room for now but even tho it looks ugly and kinda ruins my mom's aesthetic, my mom totally gets that this is a space he needs and even sometimes the mess is too much and she just wants to throw everything away but she is very happy by seeing my baby brother playing with his toys.
She has to sacrifice some aesthetic for her kids, and this is what every parent should do. Kids are only kids once, and they are gonna be grown-up adults, and you are gonna be wishing you could have given them a more colorful and cheerful childhood.
I always think about a tiktok I saw from a goth mom. Their whole house was black/grey but the babys room was like an explosion of colour 😊 she was very conscious about the need of colour in babys development 😊
Omg my goth sim family got that same treatment! I made the house fully goth except for the kids room wich was very colorful and magical. Ppl that pressure children into some dumb aesthetics for internet clout shouldn‘t be allowed to have kids.
Im one of those. My house was all black and gray, when i got pregnant, everything turned i to dino explosion. Ive still got skulls everywhere, but weve added a ton of color to the house and his room is like pre k jurassic park. Ive even started *wearing* more color because i wabt him to be happy.
Can you share her @? Would love to support that mom!
@@JilTheReal I don't know the account name, but most of her videos start with something like "Another day in the life of a goth baby" so I'm sure if you search for goth baby they'll pop up!
wanted to go down that path with my 2nd child. The beige nursery aesthetic was just getting started and seemed very appealing. My daughter VERY clearly loved bright colors everywhere, the more the better. 😂 😆 she won 🤗 it makes her happy and it's an easy yes for me.
I really truly believe that the "sad beige" trend simply boils down to this: Status Symbol.
The rich and "classy" have clean, neutral homes, furnished with simple, expensive, clean décor and toys.
Most of the beige toys and clothing are SO EXPENSIVE compared to the rainbow, gaudy counterparts, even within the same brand name. Rainbow toys are cheap, and easily accessible at any Walmart, but usually you have to seek out the beige, neutral toys from somewhere like Target(yes, at my class level--AKA: poverty--Target is considered expensive) or purchase online for a markup.
Most of my childrens' toys are hand-me-downs or yard sale finds, and they are whatever color they happen to be, I'm just happy my children have toys at all.
It's all an act of looking higher class and neat. (In my opinion.)
Edited to say: I hope this doesn't come off as judgmental of those who can afford the more expensive toys. I am so happy for them!! I'm talking in terms of the trend trying to push the idea that beige is better.
Rich people should consider it more sustainable to get used toys. I think you're smart to get used toys when they are so plentiful!
@@lauralaforge558 I agree. Also a lot of older toys were built more sturdy and last longer, so they can be enjoyed for so much longer!
Exactly this👆🏾
Salem Tovar went over that this is definitely a don't be poor trend. It also started though, something like 10 years ago, when there were a whole bunch of toy recalls. A lot of plastic toys were found to have problematic levels of things like BPA if they were chewed on or brought into a car. There were so many choking hazards. Paint kept having random toxins in it, which could harm kids, again, if placed in their mouth. So people started gravitating to unpainted wooden toys to avoid toxins. Then it caught on with influencers and took on a new life.
As I understand it, there are not as many recalls now. Fewer kids seem to be choking to death on Nickelodeon's toy of the year. Spray painting something beige seems so much more toxic than those plastic toys I grew up with that probably gave me a toxic load of ten different chemicals.
I absolutely agree. Kids are inherently messy. Beige says, “Our home isn’t touched by mess, we’re perfect and can afford a clean and consistent aesthetic at all times.”
‘Beige moms’ says it all: “my priority is my social media presence and my influence over my kid is completely beige.”
"I want MY play set tree to look..." gurl really?
When my daughter was growing up, our home looked like a circus exploded in a phone booth. She was happy, and she played, she dressed up the cat, and we laughed. My home was never a showplace, I worked while she was little (but after a great company with flex hours). I was the opposite of these sad bright moms - maybe I was tacky loud mom? Yeah, I like that actually.
She's 20 and in college now and is home every weekend. We play video games together, and watch You Tube and Tiktok... and we still laugh so much.
Our home is so much more tidy, less circus colors. The time just flew by!! I'm so grateful for her and how we enjoyed her childhood.
There's a time for everything. When the kids are little, maybe it's THEIR time to color your world.
I love this
I'll never be a mom but your comment brought me to (good) tears. My mom has always been like this and I'm so grateful. She never got mad at messes
Perhaps loud tacky moms are getting their kids ready for the real world of chaos... or perhaps it's b/c I have a fondness for loud and tacky when dealing with curious kids and sparking their creativity.
I love what you said it's so true. When I had 3 small ones everybody said it would fly by and to enjoy. I heard it so much I wish I would have paid a little more attention, because it did!
Now I realize just like nature, life is full of seasons. Enjoy them all ❤
Very well put. When we bring kids into the world it’s their turn to color OUR world.
“neutralize the tree” sounds like she is unaliving it 😭 😂
She definitely unalived those poor ornaments.
She sort of did 😅
I’m in Australia and it’s the same here. I too call them beige babies. Shops full of boring beige baby clothes and items. Babies need colours.
One of the best discussions I have seen on this topic, thank you!!
The sad beige trend that also influences the clothing parents buy for their children is also odd and frankly, kind of heartbreaking 😢. I LOVE seeing my 3 year-old's face light up when he sees clothing with his favorite movie characters, or colorful animals and vehicles. He also associates what he wears with the toys he plays with and the items he sees out in the world. I'll say "Look buddy, there's a truck, like the one you have on your shirt! Or look at these dogs on your pjs-- we love dogs, don't we?" He giggles and smiles and is a fast, perceptive, little learner. Making a beige aesthetic your whole personality and forcing your kids to accept that you just don't like "bright colors" is selfish and immature!
I took a child development class in college and I seem to remember being told that high contrast was important for infants. It can be black and white, but they do better with things that are easier to differentiate for young eyes. I worry that there could be acual repercussions of everything being so similar in tone.
I was thinking the same thing. I read something saying that the older you get the less vibrant color is. Obviously color could be a huge stimulant with a child’s development. Probably why kids’ toys are brightly colored.
I recently took a professional development course on playground design for childcare centers, and even there it mentioned this, but as a safety issue. If the playground and the flooring are similar in color, they can have trouble differentiating between the equipment and the floor, which can lead to more playground injuries as kids trip over things.
With the "beige everything" stuff, the kid's toys aren't going to contrast enough with the ground, so they won't notice they're stepping on a toy until it's too late. Or if the equipment blends into the flooring like the slide at 19:50, they might be focused on getting something on the other side of the room, and in their excitement forget that there's a slide in the way and trip over it.
Agreed. I think it would be most sensible to to have two spaces, namely a playroom and nursery room or spaces. The playroom can be stimulating and colorful for activities. And the nursery can be for sleep and more muted, soothing and less stimulating. It even allows the kid some agency because they can choose what space they want to be in and thus if they want more or less stimulation.
We had child development as part of our home ec class. Yes, in the 70's, we actually had classes that taught cooking, sewing and yes, childhood education. So even I know this.
WHAT do they teach kids in high school these days?
@@seameology I had a class like this in high school called “Home Economics” and that was around 2005. I wonder if they still have that class?….
As a Montessori teacher: please don't buy expensive "sad beige" stuff on Dr. Montessori's account. Baby needs to hear speech plenty and often, practice face-to-face time, explore their five senses (including colorful sights and sounds!) and enjoy age-appropriate freedom of movement. The other stuff is just "gravy."
And it's not like Montessori schools/toys are devoid of color (same with Waldorf which I have more experience with and has similar stuff). Wood is popular but it's often painted, paired with colorful fabric, etc. Don't forget the abundant crayons and colored pencils either. "Natural" doesn't have to mean bland.
@@omreee686especially since nature has brought colors like tree leaves, flowers, and animals like butterflies
What about the steiff teddy bear, gold rattler, gold/platinum baby pacifier. I am in a great position to buy nice things for my future baby.
I went to a Waldorf school as a kid and it was COLOURFULL. There was not a single white/gray/beige wall in the entire school. The classrooms had different colours depending on the ages of the students (younger kids had warm colours like red, orange and yellow, older kids had colder colours like purple, blue and green), we did LOTS of arts and crafts, and the toys were painted in all sorts of colours with natural, water based paint.
We had montessori toys too and they were not sad beige at all. They were sort of minimalistic (to encourage the imagination), but they were made with naturally dyed materials. We even learned how to dye wool yarn with different plants to make different colours!
A Waldorf/Montessori childhood is VERY colourful, and it makes me sad to see these influencer parents use these labels to justify their children's sad beige lives.
The montessori schools I went to when I was younger definitely had the opposite look of what these beige moms are desperately aspiring for. My first school was a renovated, traditional Filipino house that was renovated to accommodate for grades K to 6, and the classrooms were so colorful. I remember my classroom specifically being green and white with patterned tile floors, and montessori-style tools of all colors to help students retain interest. Going to high school at a different campus but still montessori, the classrooms for our age range were far less colorful but there was still an effort to keep things visually interesting while we learned, and the pre-k students still had the most colorful tools in their part of the school. Montessori learning doesn't want aesthetics, it needs a balance between natural tools and efficient learning, which I feel its succeeded at far better than spray-painting your kids' toys beige to "be less overstimulating and pretty"
You are SO REFRESHING. Giving ypur opinion, telling your story without bashing anyone and somehow still appreciating both sides that your debating. Its incredible and i love the effort youre putting in to these videos.
My playroom growing up was hot pink and a Paris theme. My mom loved to decorate and it was my safe space because pink is my favorite color. My mom also let me paint my bedroom neon lime green in middle school. Never regretted it and kinda miss it to be honest! Life is meant to be lived in color and children are not trends!!
This speaks to the greater trend of children as accessory instead of their real purpose. You should talk about all these women in due date groups saying how depressed and upset they are to be having a boy instead of a girl because they want a “mini” or a “bestie”. They want an accessory.
This comment should be higher up on this list.
This! Completely agree and that's so sad.
all i can think of is just damn, gender role enforcement starts early huh. like my primary worry is for trans and/or intersex kids, but even dycis children dont always adhere to those tastes. my cister (sic) sure didnt! and my parents were sensible and respected that. as if their sons would never want to play dressup, or their girls couldnt climb trees. ugh
dycis? @@gwennorthcutt421
@@gwennorthcutt421That's.... Unfortunately not really the point here anyway.
No matter the gender or association of the child, no child deserves to be nothing more than an *object* to the parent. Is what OP and these repliers are saying.
These moms/parents seem to acknowledge that all they want out of a child is a lil trophy to flaunt around for bragging rights, instead of treating them like a human being. It has nothing to do with gender roles. It has everything to do with ethics and humanity.
My concern isn't just the developmental possibilities of a lack of color, but also that these kids are growing up in a home where the priority is looking good for a bunch of strangers on the Internet. How many other (independently small) ways is this going to affect the child's environment and experience? I have friends who grew up in extremely image focused homes in the 90's who are in therapy to deconstruct some of what they learned now. I can't imagine it will be better for these kids. That said I also tend to believe and hope that the majority of parents are doing their best for their kids, based on their knowledge and experience. I hope that remains true with these parents and helps to mitigate some of the potential harm.
That’s such a great point. It’s also likely that these moms won’t allow the normal messes kids make while playing. I had a friend as a 10 year old whose mother wouldn’t even let her bring friends into the house because she wanted a picture perfect home. Yikes!
This should be called Sad Moms Put Their Babies in Beige Prison.
This is what I was thinking too. These kids may start to feel like their wants and needs aren't as important as making sure everything looks nice, even though I also believe and hope the parents want the best for their kids and would never want to make them feel that way. Since kids are still learning how to understand their environment and social situations, they can leap to conclusions you might not expect and even things that seem small to an adult could have an unintended impact on kids' self esteem and how they see their role in their family.
I really want to know if there's a correlation between sad beige moms and almond moms. Either way, the sad beige moms are borderline abusive and I wouldn't be surprised if they grew into continuing to force "aesthetics" onto their "dolls".
You could dive into the whole “Montessori” movement as well. It’s something that was born out of necessity for lower income communities and wealthy people adopted it to sell products.
I went to a montessori school and no, in most places, it is still about the learning style.
@@super-quantumunitintelproc8107 that would be nice if that was the case everywhere. I’ll clarify that I meant the term “montessori” became trendy in the last few years and it’s used as a buzzword, instead of a curriculum, to sell sad beige toys and accessories.
I also don't necessarily like everything about tje Montessori's approach.
It's good for many kids, but not for others.
I think adults should realise that, rather than getting fixated on trends.
@@super-quantumunitintelproc8107 I’m specifically talking about the part where wealthy people are using it as a buzz word to sell products.
@@maribreeze7560 Alright then! That's a great topic imo. If you wanna be enraged, look up "Montessori beds"
So they grow up feeling like there’s no room for quirks, mismatching, mistakes, clutter.. they are going to raise perfectionists who don’t know how to relax
Many people repeat the behavior or run away from it. The kid could rebel by being a total mess to stick it to mom.
Or the workforce will just make them that way anyway
@@intuitive_duck yeah that happens too
@@normandy2501 not always
It looks like this beige sad moms don’t even understand why the seasonal depression exist. It’s SAD to live in a world where everything is just white, brown, white, grey and dark green. We are all just happy with spring because the colors are back in nature and our life!!
Well, seasonal depression actually has a lot more to do with daylight time variation, during spring the days get consecutively longer. The colours do bring a lot of happiness though, not gonna argue that haha
anecdotally i agree with you (hate overcast days for this reason) but sad is actually linked to the reduced daylight hours in the winter. that's why a commonly used treatment for sad is a uv lamp - makes your brain think its getting more daylight.
@@gabrielaribeiro6155 I feel like it's a little bit of both. I agree, moreso to do with the daylight, but there are some recent studies that show green in nature also helps your mood (lowers blood pressure and decreases anxiety). Personally, I have moved from a state where everything died in the winter and it was all grey and my seasonal depression was a lot worse than in my new state where it still gets overcast and still somewhat cold but there's evergreens and other greenery still around.
Arguably, state #1 was a lot colder (getting down to 0F) and thus I also didn't go out as much but idk, I still think the greenery helps. I missed it so much while in state #1
There’s seasonal depression in summer as well though, I actually thrive in cloudy shades of grey type of weather 🙈
I hate spring, but I agree kids NEED color
lmao not me finishing the learning farm song by heart. “Shapes and colors, music too, there’s so much to do!” My little one is seven now and it *still* hasn’t left my head.
My nephew had that toy and that song haunted me for months after every visit 😂
As a preschool teacher, this video is incredible and touches on so many important issues. Thank you for making it!!!!!!
The sad beige also sends a message that you’re wealthy enough to buy everything new. Babies need a lot of stuff, especially if you’re a first-time parent, and most people depend on hand-me-downs and gifts which are inevitably not all going to match perfectly. At my old job, when someone got pregnant, you better believe at least one person was coming in with a trash bag or 2 of their kid’s old clothes to pass on. It makes me wonder what these people did with all their baby shower gifts, because I have doubts that your second cousin is going to spend $300 on a beige and sage wooden block set for you.
Babies don't need that much stuff but we're collectively lead to believe they do...
You're absolutely right that you got to be rich to get all the brand new trendy stuff for your kids supposedly well-being.
Hi 👋🏼 converted sad beige mom here! I bought lots of woods, neutrals, and didn’t have a ton of color for my son when he was born. But around 1 year old her started to show more interest in those types of toys and toys gave in. I didn’t think it was fair to force my child to play with things I liked when he clearly had a desire for the bright colorful toys. My daughter came around and there’s no rules on color in this house anymore. I never even thought of the developmental aspect but I’m glad I gave in for my children’s sake 🤍
"Converted sad beige mom" made me giggle! I'm right there with ya!
All that's left to do is to convert that sad grey heart at the end :)
Good job paying attention to what your child wanted! The aesthetic route is a nice idea, but the development is so much more important.
Good job on paying attention to your child's wants.
I love color (beige included) but I always am curious what makes you gravitate to the neutrals? I've heard a lot of answers and always appreciate when people share
Thank you for this video. I am not really on socials and had no clue this was a thing but I LOVED all of the points you made in this video. This seems like a possible breeding ground for developmental concerns and I love the point you make about parents making it about them and not their kids.
OMG I love this type of content! Finaaaallyy there’s someone calling out the BS of these “normalized” but ridiculous trends. Thank you!
A pediatric audiologist friend of mine BEGS everyone to please cover their kid's toy's speakers with Scotch tape. You'll still hear the sound but it is usually FAR too loud for baby's ears (and it's better for Mom and Dad too lol)
We put a large bandaid over one of the speakers on our daughters toy because it was SOO loud!
I did this! They were so dang loud, every speaker got duct tape. The toys were still loud and interactive, but they weren't absolutely overwhelming.
We did this with an Elmo "radio" toy for my oldest...it was just too startling loud.
Is the tape a choking risk? I would worry baby would peel the tape off and choke on it.
@@daphnereal3129 she never touched it. It was strong enough tape. It blended in and then she never seemed to notice. She could enjoy her toy without it being shockingly loud.
I love that she's wearing beige while talking about sad beige moms! 😄❤
Look, I love beige! 🤣 Just not for kid's toys hahaha
I thought it was cute and almost mocking the moms in a very soft way
She's in a beige room, too! 😂 Good thing the green plant is there, or I'd go insane.
I love when she points this out in the video! I also, love seeing the bright toys she has for her child!
that's all I can focus on 😂
My girls are 6 and 5, and I basically let them choose their own outfits, as long as they're weather/activity appropriate. Tbh, they look straight-up crazy sometimes, but they're happy... We've had colorful plastic toys, noisy toys, wooden toys, etc. Whatever works for your family.
I loved the insight you gave in this video. The psychological effects on "sad beige kids" has been something I've wondered about since the trend first started.
Montessori Teacher here! None of the classrooms I've ever been in, even when training, were beige or even beige leaning. There are tons of colors in Montessori classrooms! Maybe not the loud plastic rainbow crap talked about in your wonderful video, but still, lots of color. Because we teachers also know that color is important for brain development! Looking at colors is literally what helps babies see! Great video by the way!
Exactly this. Color is important but so many of the colorful toys nowadays have colors that don't even exist in nature and can be extremely overly stimulating. Especially if it flashes or talks/ plays music none stop
Yes! I love the colourful Grimm's toys. We have the blocks and my son loves them. We're not Montessori but the toys are just so beautiful and exciting!
Ikr? When I think of Montessori I don't think about beige. Natural good quality materials maybe, but it isn't an aesthetic.
Yes Montessori and Waldorf toys are such a great option if you don't want to over stimulate your child or home but still want to use colours!
@@francoiselafferty-hancock5112 you’re comment made me look those up and thats exactly what I like! I like color but not that non natural plastic color, those toys look great!
That's so depressing. I'm not a mom (or plan to), but I assume beige stuff would get dirty SO fast with a baby.
They don’t let their kids get dirty 🤮 Not allowed to play outside or messy play
beige crayons probably@@restingwitchfacetarot605
@@restingwitchfacetarot605is this fr???
It’s hard for ME at 41 to keep anything light color clean! Let alone a baby or child!
Every color gets the same amount of dirty. It’s just that some colors show the dirt more so then you’re forced to clean it more often rather than just leaving it dirty.
Holy cow, I've been a bystander to all this without even realizing the depth of this trend. This explains so much to me with all the products I see and the uniform plain nurseries that make me feel bad that mine doesn't look as nice. I will say I am a sucker to pastels, but I thrive to give my kids any thing rainbow colored if it can come in it. I'm so grateful for your video cause this trend does too well at trying to suck new moms in. Never spray paint baby toys.
Thank you for talking about the spray paint!!! Kids eating paint was my first concern as soon as
I saw the painted tree.
In a few years, these moms are going to be wondering “why is my 6-year-old sitting in front of the wall, drooling?!” 🤣💀
😂 the favorite "toys" my 3 year old niece likes are the sparkliest most colorfull jewelry I own and my make up ,is like her dreams come true bright colorful things and textures to "play" with I let her play but only if I am watching her. So making a toddler only play with sad beige toys is not good for them they like colorful things.
@imitationporcelain , yes, very young children are attracted to bright colors. That's why a lot of children's educational toys are in bright colors like red and yellow. It's also why a lot of book covers for children and adults are colorful. Even now, when I'm shopping I am often immediately drawn to bright colors. I keep a healthy balance in my inside decor, but my garden is an explosions of colorful flowers, tomatoes, pumpkins and other fruits and vegetables. It's delightful. Life is colorful.
Ok, lets look at the toys of other eras. Yes, childreen like brighly painted toys, we've stablished. They like high contrasting colors even more than just bright solid colors. Before plastic tho, brightly colored toys were hand painted, and were Sexclusively for rich kids, and less fortunate childreen were lucky to own a tin train, a ragdoll or a wooden spinner. If they grew up to be mentally imparired for lack of stimuli; well, we never noticed it inbour grandpas and grandmas. They learned their colors, so there's that.
Even if i had lots of colorful blocks and toys; my favorite things to play with as a child were prop foods, sticks, leaves, seashells, my fathers hardware box, and my mom's sewing thread box (much to their dismay). My take from that is kids not only enjoy color for the sake of it. They like color inside categories they can identify and develop preferences for: fruits, color pencils, toy cars etc. And they like to learn and imitate adults while they discover the world more than playing with any toy.
@@Ab3ndcgi, a lot of what you are saying applies to older kids. But babies, who can't even sit up yet, also benefit from color. For example, it can help develop their eyesight, among lots of other important things.
Also, children of all ages spent a lot more time outside back in the day, surrounded by color. And the world in general was more colorful than we realize. A lot of stuff that survives from previous centuries has faded over time, so we imagine everything was drab and dull. But when you see depictions of how some things actually looked back when they were originally made, it can be shocking how colorful things actually were.
Personally, I think if experts are telling you playing with brightly colored toys will benefit your child, and not playing with such toys has even the tiniest chance of hurting them, why in the world would you not give them some brightly colored toys?
@@Ab3ndcgi Before plastic, paint and dye were used. However, for poorer kids, their toys wouldn't be carefully preserved, and so the dye would fade and paint would chip off. If we look even at the middle ages, we see a wide variety of toys like balls and marbles and dolls and carved figures, usually all quite colorful. Hollywood's idea of drab, earth toned medieval peasants is very wrong. Take a look at illuminated manuscripts, even preserved clothing we have, and it's all richly dyed in the brightest colors possible. Even if a peasant couldn't afford kermes (a red dye) they could afford madder root (another red dye). There are so many ways to dye fabric, and even change that color depending on your methods and mordants. Life was very colorful, for everyone.
This makes me so sad. Early Childhood educator here... studied for a long time to be able to be bossed around by toddlers all day. But - early childhood education is my passion and having studied deeply into child development... this is so wrong. These poor kids probably cannot tell the difference between many of those colors, most likely don't even see clear lines for a while, and all the things that you stated. I don't love how chaotic kids toys can be but they still need it. They need high contrasting colors, realistic items.. I could go on and on. The highest early childhood accreditations would never pass any of the sad beige mom curated rooms as a high level of learning.
I’m also a qualified early childhood educator and worked in the sector for almost 2 decades, I completely agree. I’m now a full time sahm, I’m so glad I’m not raising my kids like this. My home is that a home for my family not the atheists of modern beige trends.
Also, I don't think I saw a single children's book in this video. It's basically never too early to start reading to a baby/toddler. I still remember grabbing my little books from a low shelf and bringing them to my mother to read when I was like 4 or 5, or just flipping through them looking at the illustrations. If there are any picture books (which are almost always colorful) around, they're probably in a cabinet or something where these kids won't think to interact with them because they're out of sight or reach.
I don’t know that the trend is necessarily harmful; bright paints commercially available are really a post-Victorian thing. Most homemade dyes were pretty muted until just before then, too, and humanity has turned out fine. But intentionally eschewing color when you have the ability to have it seems strange. I guess you could argue that I’m a monochrome pink mom; but at least our rainbow toys are actually rainbow!
I’m really curious to know what your opinion on children playing with spray paint covered toys is? Young kids put so much in their mouths and I can’t imagine all that spray paint is good for them
@@nobodynohow8039 Fair point, but one thing this all-beige aesthetic really lacks is contrast (which is especially important for newborns who don't really see color yet and are most likely to not be leaving the house and seeing color elsewhere). Even before bright colors were common, there were still dark and light, shiny and dull, etc. Anyways, this color thing is not exactly a health crisis but the attitude that's it's fine or even aspirational to purposefully deny a baby stimuli is worrying IMO.
I haven't seen videos about Sad Beige Moms, but I have noticed a lot of moms having that color set in their kid's room when I watch reels on Instagram. I honestly thought nothing of it, but after watching your video, that makes sense.
You are a great speaker, so elocuent, the way you comunicate and deliver message is so perfect, love it
If you cant sacrifice your aesthetic for your child, then are you really ready for them?
I think a key issue with this trend is that the moms are still buying a ton of stuff but try to make it seem peaceful by keeping everything neutral. Overstimulation comes from an excess of choices, not an excess of colors. Honestly, I wouldn't want that big plastic tree in my house either. My solution? DON'T BUY IT! I keep very few plastic toys in my house and virtually no toys that light up or make sound. I definitely don't think they are necessary as teaching tools. We read a lot of books, spends lots of time outside, and do lots of cooking and crafting. The result is a peaceful home that isn't cluttered and is conducive to learning and open ended play. And it is still very colorful!
We are on the same page! We own 3 toys that make sound/ have light affects. A fire truck, a police car and an ambulance. My son can play for hours with wooden blocks of duplo.
"Overstimulation comes from an excess of choices, not an excess of colors." ONE MILLION PERCENT. Spot on.
THAT 🙏 it is just not needed to buy a ton of toys no mater if colorful or badge
Outside is perfect, mud, leaves, worms to eat… kids love whatever they can explore.
It doesn't have to be colourful though. In the times of yore, life was not 'colourful'. People couldn't afford 'colour'. Look at Victorian bedrooms, or the bedrooms and nurseries of times way before that. Colour and paint was expensive. Children still thrived. They don't need 'colour' to thrive, where are the studies showing this!! They need love, attention, lots f time, lots of play in nature and with people they love, in order to thrive. Not rooms filled with colour.
First-time moms we always fall into buying expensive toys, and children don't play with that, but they play with the box in which the toy came
I could never be an influencer. Nope. I am so private, it’s almost painful. All money ain’t good money is what my grandma always told me!
I'm fully qualified to teach preschool and in my ECE classes they said that bright colors were actually crucially important for infants' visual development, kids are born with pretty bad eyesight and the high contrast and bright colors helps them with focus and adjustment. Sound helps their little brains developing literally from before they're even born, color helps their eyes begin to do their part in that process as soon as their eyes are open. They need the visual stimulation for their cognitive development AND physical development. This trend is honestly deeply concerning if you know anything about early childhood development.
Came here to say the same thing. Wrote my comment before I saw yours :')
(Though I am not fully qualified yet, I will be eventually!)
That's what I was wondering, if it would actually affect brain development for vision especially if they didn't leave the house much. As someone with a visual impairment you can only get so much back later.
I’m a preschool teacher, and it breaks my heart to see moms limiting their child for their own aesthetics.
Amazing effort put into this video!! Great points
in fact, this fisher price thing is totally overstimulading your baby. Everybody told me not to buy it.
Totally agree
I am an early childhood educator who has spent literally decades working with children under the age of 5. Boy, do I have thoughts on this! Infants’ vision develops throughout their first 12 months. Initially young infants focus on high contrast and bright colors because they are the easiest for them to see. This preference persists as their eyes and vision develop during the first 12 months. A sad beige mom to a young infant who insists on that aesthetic could be delaying their child from being able to see, and thus learn about, a large portion of their world. Having said that, I do believe that highly colorful environments(think this-looks-like-a-rainbow-vomited-all-over-this-place) can also be overstimulating to young children. Bright colors should be present, but having neutrals is also beneficial. Some examples: have many colorful toys and natural material neutral toys as well. Forego the bright rainbow plastic storage bins and use neutral fabric baskets. Paint your child’s bedroom a muted neutral, but introduce color through linens, wall hangings, rugs, etc. It is all about balance -avoid the extremes. And as an educator, I cannot end this comment without saying to all parents read to your child early and often! And please, please, please don’t “sad beige mom” your book selections.
I too, hate the good 'ol 90s rainbow vomit trend. My favorite decorating "trend" is making the walls, furniture, appliances, and flooring neutral colored, which allows interesting objects to be pops of color, so your eyes are drawn to them, like toys, books, food, houseplants, disposable supplies, etc.
Early educator teacher here as well. I have my room so full of color and the kids LOVE it. It definitely plays a huge part in not only their development but mood as well.
I pick whatever will hide stains the best 😅
Exactly! I think the discussions here about Montessori (natural materials with plenty of primary colors) pretty much nail it...realism!! Like you said, balance! And the needs of the child for visible, contrasting colors. What colors are the world? Seasonally ever-changing blue sky, white clouds, green plants, brown wood, spots of colorful flowers, fruits, vegetables. Natural is generally peaceful, but displays a great variety of colors; only in very hot, desolate, dry places is it ever just plain beige.
The saddest thing for me is that these people are selling the idea that their kids are, at best, accessories that need to be styled into their life or, at worst, that they are a hindrance and an imposition to their lifestyles that needs to be whitewashed into the background.
Love that you wore beige to critique the beige mom trend.
God forbid any of these women read a book on child development.
What makes me sad is, there's a charm in the chaos children bring. When I see the floor with toys scattered around, and the window full of tiny hand prints, and the bookcase full of poorly drawn family portraits... One day everything will be gone. And you will miss it. Now you get tired just thinking about how to clean it, but remember to enjoy every phase of their lifes, you only get to enjoy it once.
Yes. This gives the "I want a child but I don't want it to look like I have a child" vibe. I don't understand it.
Thank you ❤
YES! My gaggle of kids are teens now. I'm already crying about them leaving LOL. I quit to stay home when my second child was 2. I love every. single. bit of my life with children. I love all the messes, the noise, every little thing. It's a tragedy to see people missing out. Deathbed regret right there. Yikes.
Thank you! Needed to read this. I have a 15 month old and am constantly cleaning up messes😂❤
@@emmytrumpetsmine 7 & 5 . Still clean up behind them 😭😭😭😭
I can’t imagine being a baby only looking at beige. Your kids development is more important than your own personal aesthetics!!
They don't care.
@@silviamagdathey really don’t. It’s like their kids are accessories to their videos.
With how bad their eyesight is, most babies probably couldn't tell anything apart. They would just be laying in a beige void, not knowing what's close to them or far away. Not knowing where one beige splotch ends and the other begins. Even their own parents' faces blend in with their beige surrounding. Hellscape.
or you can teach your kid to be asthetically pleasing
Thank God, someone finally talks about it 😢
As a mom I love your perspective of this isn’t just your home right now and it’s just a season… my kids toys are definitely obnoxious at times but they are so happy and it’s like there will be time to have an aesthetic house when my kids grow up so I’ll take the reminders of childhood around my house while it’s so short
“She would just roll away and find something else to play with.” 😂 IDK why that’s so funny to me!
And that is the real Montessori way! we all have fallen in the trap, but if you want to go Montessori, open the tupperware drawer and mybe a wooden spoon and let the magic start :-)
Like my cats who prefer any chewed torn apart disgusting thousands years old cardboard box over their new toy 😂❤
a little log of a baby just noping out of a boring toy mat for something louder and brighter is so great
@@AerynKDesigns ahaha exactly, like: "Bye, Im outta here" 🤣
That part got me too. Lol
Why can't beige parents have a *gasp* Toy box where you can hold bright and colorful toys, and put them away when you have guests or once baby is asleep?
Yeah, that seems to be the simple solution but apparently they don’t even want any color that’s hidden
I have a ton of large woven baskets. We are a very neurodivergent household. We're easily overstimulated so reducing visual stimuli helps us.
Babies see contrast so making everything a shade of beige is depriving them.
As a parent, I’m very appreciative of this video and being able to find your channel!
As a currently very pregnant early twenties gal, I see it as a class thing. I’m taking whatever I can get. If someone wants to buy me something then I can’t complain, bc i can’t afford to buy every single thing I want, let alone have it fit any sort of “aesthetic”. I got hand me down clothes for my baby which I’m a million times over the moon grateful for because now they have clothes! If I was so stuck in my ways that my baby’s wardrobe/toys needed to look a certain way then rent wouldn’t be paid. Influencer looks can only happen seamlessly with influencer money.
You mean 'influencer credit cards'? Because they usually don't have the cash reserves to actually sustain that lifestyle...
@@MZB80Right. So many people want to appear wealthy, but that can be faked. Having debt up to your eyeballs isn’t wealth, it’s a curse.
Same! I've been blessed with so many hand me downs for our kid's clothing, and we rarely buy them any toys because they get plenty for their birthdays from family! This does mean I have to lower my standards for how picture-perfect they are going to look every day. It helped me become aware that I was viewing my first kid as an accessory on some level because I cared so much what people thought of how he looked. Our kids are having their childhood. They're not models and I wouldn't want them to be.
If you begin to follow things like Montessori groups, please have in mind that most of that content is actually misunderstanding the point. Montessori is not about colourless toys, it's about giving every child the same opportunity (and simple tools were originally the way to achieve that). So try to focus on the important things (follow the child's interests, enjoy everyday activities together etc).
Let me further assure you that they anyway grow out of the clothes and toys so fast that there is little value in insisting on asthetics
I hate social media.
The fact that you sang the welcome to our learning farm we have lots to show you. I about fell out of my chair! My son had this one and loved it!