Back in my day Doug grabbed Patti Mayo's hand and the world cycled colors. It was one of the most powerful feelings as a little one. BUT NEVER BEFORE MARRIAGE YA DEGENS!!!!
Outfit goes hard as hell in this one tbh Edit: AND IT HAS THEMATIC SIGNIFICANCE !!! Congrats on escaping your castle, I hope to reach my own beach someday
I am currently living back with my mother after a 10-year long relationship ended and after 6 years of being independent, this video hits home so much and I am looking ahead and antsy to get my own place again. I hate having to explain that I am back home with my mom not because I am a moocher but because I fell on hardship and I want more than anything to be out of my cage again. All of this happening in the middle of my transition (my breakup wasn't because of that, it was just a coincidence). The past month and a half has been walking on eggshells and trying everything I can to not be a burden and never truly feeling welcome in the space that I was welcomed with open arms to. All of this while my Mom watches her son turn into a woman. It's hard. This video meant a lot, and not only that, it is about one of my favourite games of all time. Just incredible.
this is hitting hard rn as i’m about to move out of parent’s house again and will finally get to do what i want to do in life. i feel pressured whenever my parents are around the house, but the only times i leave the house is for work. you’ve really reassured me that my choice of moving is the right one and feeling bad about it isn’t my fault. thank you
I'm sorry for that episode during mother's day. The way you described your relationship with your parents really resonates with me. And Ty for the video, ico is to me one of the most inspiring pieces of art ever made. It's incredible how that castle made me feel at home and a stranger in a unknown world at the same time
10/10 title Edit after watching: Sometimes you don't realize you're trying to run, nor do you realize there's a cage in the first place - maybe that's how Yorda felt about her mother's castle. Maybe that's how I feel. It's good to know there might be something to look forward to, and I'm so happy to hear about where you're at now. Thank you for making this.
Just a heads up since you just moved, check the sacrificial anode on your water heater. If it's degraded it can lead to your water heater getting damaged. It's a pretty cheap fix and it saves you in the long run!
Wonderfully done vid at a time where I, and from the comments also a lot of others, are either questioning their cages or preparing to watch the castle crumble. Always reassuring to know none of us are alone in this struggle and that escaping is what needs to be done, even if it's an uncomfortable new world outside of the bars we find ourselves behind.
this is so lovely! I'm glad yall have a place of your own again. I'm also trying to get out of my mom's house and trying to get some friends out of their mom's houses too. it's been a struggle and it's encouraging to hear a happy end to that story.
please keep making these videos not a lot of people are so open with there lives and issues, it helps with issues that people don’t touch on most TH-camrs are showing off what they have, you are amazing for making these video’s, please keep making them!!!
I'm really glad you got out of there, Penelope. The situation reminds me of one I had with an ex a few years back - sharing a room with my girlfriend in her mother's house, being made to know implicitly but very clearly that we were not welcome to exist in any other part of the building. It was rough. I'm glad you both got out of there with your relationship intact.
I always love when Leadhead posts, and with a similar situation (ish) with my parents I guess I feel a less alone. Also congrats on the new place to the both of you !!
I genuinely hope you never stop making videos, I love them a lot, and your real conversations about life has helped this 20 year old trans girl a lot in a lot of ways Also, if you haven't seen it, I think you'd love I Saw The TV Glow
Hot Take: This makes a better story than it does a game. I say that knowing ICO's impact on gaming as a whole. My beef is not with the amazing artstyle or music or the story itself but with the mechanics of the game. There is something profoundly annoying about an escort mission where the person you're escorting makes no real effort to defend themselves or follow you. Frustration from this leads to a narrative dissonance between the player and story (at least for me personally) because you playing as Ico you should care for Yorda like Ico does. Instead I was always at my wits end with her. Which is problematic because the game crescendos with a section towards the end meant to highlight how lonely the game feels without Yorda by Ico' side and I had to come to that realization outside of my own personal relief as a player in not having to escort her anymore. Maybe my mistake was playing it for the first time in 2024 after experiencing AI companions (like Alyx in Half Life 2 or Ellie in Last of Us) that were influenced by ICO and improved on what this game started.
Your videos bring me such joy and comfort in life. Living with parents as an adult (particularly when you’re queer and they don’t fully approve) is a very trying experience. I’m doing that right now so I’m very glad to see you move out and find a new home with your found family, there is hope! :) love ya girlie ❤ you’re amazing
Thank you for another amazing video. I am so glad that you have been able to achieve this goal, congratulations. Your life parallels with ICO are so relatable and I wish I'd seen when I was playing it through twenty-some-odd years ago. One of the things I adored about that game back then was the save mechanic. It made the last act of the story feel so much more tense. Also, ICO had amazing music. Now I'm gonna go dig my PS2 out of storage and replay it.
This made me so happy. Congrats on your new home! Great video btw I had no idea about the thematic significance of ico and how it can be interpreted as a situation like that. Keep it going 👍🏼
Love your videos. Theyre unique atleast in the sense that i havnt found content that makes me think, introspect, or roll my relationships around in my head, current or past. I moved my gf in with me while im at my dads and it didnt work out because of my family and her mom was going through a struggle and she had to move back with her mom to help her out so i followed and it was a weird living situation because of her moms boyfriend at the time but they eventually had to move in with other family and me back to mine. Im grateful i found someone who i could move through these problems with. I hope the best for yall and that yall get on your feet and find your own place in the world. Keep doing your thing and thsnks for the videos friendo
This video hits way too close to home. I went to stay with my girlfriend for new year's a few months back and my parents threw a fit over it when I returned, telling me they felt shunned and uncared about. And yet they won't try to put in any work to engage wholly with me on my interests. It always has to be me the one who asks them to engage, to talk with me, to accommodate me. And I do it all for them unprompted way more often. They frame everything under the light of me being selfish and entitled, while I do so much for others. And it's never enough for them. The hardest part of living with my parents is knowing that they care and they love me and they still insist on hurting me. Maybe once I move out, that space will be enough for our relationship to start to mend. I'm not looking for therapy in the youtube comment section, no I'm here to tell you all that there is hope, there is escape, and there is freedom. I know it and I reach for it daily, now harder than ever before. Not out of spite for my parents, but out of hope for a better life for myself. I'm going to make it.
That absolutely sucks. I hope you get proper housing soon Lead! 😢 (Edit: Glad you did! 😊) Nobody deserves that. All my parasocial love. ❤ Edit: I have a similar sort of relationship with my father. He's different though. It's like he's bipolar. Sometimes he's warm and jokey and nice and other time he snaps and explodes at you, he frequently calls me useless and explains away things I say as being due to me lacking or not taking my medication. Basically he's an asshole and I'd love to leave but I can't right now. My mum is fine but non-confrontational, so she never stands up to him. Thankfully he doesn't abuse anyone. Recently came out as mtf and they were justifiably shocked, but it's difficult to grow into this except for in private as they require me to wait for a year or two to make sure I'm certain. I already know I'm certain. I'm 20 and every time I get hormone injections it's one more irreversible or hard to reverse change on my body. I hope one day I can be independent like you, and support my own girlfriend. (If I can find her..) Have a brilliant day and thank you for your work. I'm certain you were a big reason for me finally cracking my egg. Live well sis! ❤
Ico is such a good game, its interesting how it was the only game that made me care about a ncp that i had to carry though the entire story And its very interesting that art can make people relate so much with their own lifes
Wow! The editing is crazy! Also love your voice it’s very soothing to listen to and every time you say something it’s just so easy to keep listening to you and its sooo hard for me to keep attention (adhd) really well done with those colors it makes the video that much cooler! Always wondered about that game glad to learn about it here. Sorry about your situation I can only imagine such a situation and doing such thing scares me at least you both have each other in these trying times
Also I super understand the living situation, and feeling cramped I hope you and your partner will make it through, Good job with the talking about the themes of the story
If there was ever a relatable video, wife and I had to to live at my parents home and is such a strain on the relationship to not be free. Its great to hear you are all back in your own place and you managed to cross that stressful bridge.
This video hit HARD. Some years ago I had to move back with my parents after a 5 year relationship ended. Going crawling back was the second hardest thing I've ever had to do. The hardest was, for a multitude of reasons, actually living there. I didn't realize just how much it had effected my mental health until I was finally able to get a new place and spent my first night in it. It was like I'd been playing life on kaizo difficulty and was finally able to change it. Glad to hear that things are getting better for you!
Thank you for sharing this very vulnerable story. And thank you for bringing this game into the conversation. An added dimension to Yorda’s trauma, often glossed over in discussion, is that her mother is bilingual... and yet she only knows one language. One portrayed as hieroglyphs, an ancient language, a dead language. One that only her mother speaks... To me, it's like knowing there's a woman in your strictly English/Spanish speaking neighborhood with a homeschooled daughter who only speaks Mandarin, because that's all she was allowed to learn. The very nature of the game's language barrier is deeply uncomfortable under this lens. But it's also part of why the game feels so liberating everytime I replay it. Neither of these children deserve what has been laid out for them, and this game gives me the means to stop all that from coming to fruition. I hope everything continues to go well for you and your partner too.
your voice is so calming. it smells like marmalade, strawberry and banana. I express a lot of things like you do, but only inside, no one can or want to see it.. I dream of showing my true self, I hope I will leave my oppressive country before I become too old so I can look young and awesome like you and dress and look like I actually want all my life, like you do.
Happy you could find that person you can have the special experience of sharing a playthrough of a game you hold dear with. Also, idk why this popped in my head but you're giving Death Note character.
These new video titles read more like fragrance descriptions than TH-cam videos
Where’s my generational trauma candle
Reminds me of 1700s book titles ☠️ (in a good way [I think?])
@@d3vitron779
Smells of sadness and anxiety.
Mmm. Brings me right back.
@@d3vitron779Target has some good ones.
Midwest Emo Song Titles
Hand holding before marriage? 👺⁉️
😅 my favourite comment
Back in my day Doug grabbed Patti Mayo's hand and the world cycled colors. It was one of the most powerful feelings as a little one.
BUT NEVER BEFORE MARRIAGE YA DEGENS!!!!
Truly scandalous
👺⁉️ is my new favorite combination
@@username-yc3bd The tenacious emojis
We healing our wounds with this one!!!
the wounds caused by me watching her last video
Outfit goes hard as hell in this one tbh
Edit: AND IT HAS THEMATIC SIGNIFICANCE !!!
Congrats on escaping your castle, I hope to reach my own beach someday
We're all gonna get there someday ♡
ikr I wish I had half her sense of style
Try not to cry at a Leadhead video challenge (Gone wrong)(100% fail)
i saw this comment in the beginning of the video and thought surely i’m built different and won’t relate to this whatsoever. AND THEN
Oh boy let’s see if I cry
Or when I cry
When? I still don’t get it 😕
Leadhead notification
this must be peak
Just finished the video, it is peak
I am currently living back with my mother after a 10-year long relationship ended and after 6 years of being independent, this video hits home so much and I am looking ahead and antsy to get my own place again.
I hate having to explain that I am back home with my mom not because I am a moocher but because I fell on hardship and I want more than anything to be out of my cage again. All of this happening in the middle of my transition (my breakup wasn't because of that, it was just a coincidence). The past month and a half has been walking on eggshells and trying everything I can to not be a burden and never truly feeling welcome in the space that I was welcomed with open arms to. All of this while my Mom watches her son turn into a woman. It's hard.
This video meant a lot, and not only that, it is about one of my favourite games of all time.
Just incredible.
Your paramore genuinely happy to game with you? Something this slow and not blowing you off?
She's a keeper.
Home isn’t a place, it’s people and connections glad you found a roof for your home
(Snapping noises coming from hands) yes!
this is hitting hard rn as i’m about to move out of parent’s house again and will finally get to do what i want to do in life. i feel pressured whenever my parents are around the house, but the only times i leave the house is for work. you’ve really reassured me that my choice of moving is the right one and feeling bad about it isn’t my fault. thank you
wake up hun new leadhead vid
I'm sorry for that episode during mother's day. The way you described your relationship with your parents really resonates with me. And Ty for the video, ico is to me one of the most inspiring pieces of art ever made. It's incredible how that castle made me feel at home and a stranger in a unknown world at the same time
This was healing. Even for someone who’s not out of their cage
10/10 title
Edit after watching:
Sometimes you don't realize you're trying to run, nor do you realize there's a cage in the first place - maybe that's how Yorda felt about her mother's castle. Maybe that's how I feel. It's good to know there might be something to look forward to, and I'm so happy to hear about where you're at now. Thank you for making this.
Lead head is so back
Just a heads up since you just moved, check the sacrificial anode on your water heater. If it's degraded it can lead to your water heater getting damaged. It's a pretty cheap fix and it saves you in the long run!
Just bought a collector's edition Ico and SOTC at AX yesterday! Quite the timing.
Wow, Leadhead video about Ico mere days after I got the game!
The aspect ratio of your videos gets flatter and flatter on every upload.
She's taking over the 2nd dimension
I fear for when she has nowhere in the second dimension to conquer and moves to the third dimension.
Leadhead will be real in 2025
Wonderfully done vid at a time where I, and from the comments also a lot of others, are either questioning their cages or preparing to watch the castle crumble. Always reassuring to know none of us are alone in this struggle and that escaping is what needs to be done, even if it's an uncomfortable new world outside of the bars we find ourselves behind.
Unironically my summer
My favourite videos you make are ones that make me fall in love with games ive never heard of. Definitely one of my favourite videos in a while
this is so lovely! I'm glad yall have a place of your own again. I'm also trying to get out of my mom's house and trying to get some friends out of their mom's houses too. it's been a struggle and it's encouraging to hear a happy end to that story.
please keep making these videos not a lot of people are so open with there lives and issues, it helps with issues that people don’t touch on most TH-camrs are showing off what they have, you are amazing for making these video’s, please keep making them!!!
Uwa! Hand holding! Lewd!
It's been years since I watched anything from you! Just fell away I guess. Great work, I've got to catch up, looks like I missed a lot :)
Also, what IS that song that starts around 2:30? I'm _sure_ I've heard it before.
I'm really glad you got out of there, Penelope. The situation reminds me of one I had with an ex a few years back - sharing a room with my girlfriend in her mother's house, being made to know implicitly but very clearly that we were not welcome to exist in any other part of the building. It was rough. I'm glad you both got out of there with your relationship intact.
Holy shitttttt that was the plot of a buffy the vampire slayer (mom stealing daughters body & living through her)
Yes! New leadhead video!!!!! Thank you so muchhh
I always love when Leadhead posts, and with a similar situation (ish) with my parents I guess I feel a less alone. Also congrats on the new place to the both of you !!
That aspect ratio is amazing, oh my
EVERYBODY GANGSTER TIL AERIE BY LENA RAINE STARTS PLAYING IN THE BACKTOUND
Another Leadhead video hitting suuuuuper close to home! How you spoil us!
Is there a single other person who makes so personal and emotional essays as Leadhead?
This was so good.
Holy shit big muscle woman. Your outfit is incredible and it makes your arms look bonkers strong!
Holding hands? Overcoming trauma? Pray tell, what fantastic world is this?!
Great video, love the outfit, too. Cheers!
I didn't expect this video to make me feel the way it did - great work as always!
Had to drop a like and comment just for the title
I genuinely hope you never stop making videos, I love them a lot, and your real conversations about life has helped this 20 year old trans girl a lot in a lot of ways
Also, if you haven't seen it, I think you'd love I Saw The TV Glow
Hot Take: This makes a better story than it does a game. I say that knowing ICO's impact on gaming as a whole. My beef is not with the amazing artstyle or music or the story itself but with the mechanics of the game.
There is something profoundly annoying about an escort mission where the person you're escorting makes no real effort to defend themselves or follow you. Frustration from this leads to a narrative dissonance between the player and story (at least for me personally) because you playing as Ico you should care for Yorda like Ico does. Instead I was always at my wits end with her. Which is problematic because the game crescendos with a section towards the end meant to highlight how lonely the game feels without Yorda by Ico' side and I had to come to that realization outside of my own personal relief as a player in not having to escort her anymore.
Maybe my mistake was playing it for the first time in 2024 after experiencing AI companions (like Alyx in Half Life 2 or Ellie in Last of Us) that were influenced by ICO and improved on what this game started.
Your videos bring me such joy and comfort in life. Living with parents as an adult (particularly when you’re queer and they don’t fully approve) is a very trying experience. I’m doing that right now so I’m very glad to see you move out and find a new home with your found family, there is hope! :) love ya girlie ❤ you’re amazing
Thank you for another amazing video. I am so glad that you have been able to achieve this goal, congratulations. Your life parallels with ICO are so relatable and I wish I'd seen when I was playing it through twenty-some-odd years ago. One of the things I adored about that game back then was the save mechanic. It made the last act of the story feel so much more tense. Also, ICO had amazing music. Now I'm gonna go dig my PS2 out of storage and replay it.
Your videos and your voice are so comforting. Always a pleasure to watch these.
This made me so happy. Congrats on your new home!
Great video btw I had no idea about the thematic significance of ico and how it can be interpreted as a situation like that. Keep it going 👍🏼
Love your videos. Theyre unique atleast in the sense that i havnt found content that makes me think, introspect, or roll my relationships around in my head, current or past. I moved my gf in with me while im at my dads and it didnt work out because of my family and her mom was going through a struggle and she had to move back with her mom to help her out so i followed and it was a weird living situation because of her moms boyfriend at the time but they eventually had to move in with other family and me back to mine. Im grateful i found someone who i could move through these problems with. I hope the best for yall and that yall get on your feet and find your own place in the world. Keep doing your thing and thsnks for the videos friendo
So glad to see the two of you are in a better spot now.
The audio glitch at 12:44 is amazing, like I know it wasn't intentional but damn is that mic funny
This video hits way too close to home. I went to stay with my girlfriend for new year's a few months back and my parents threw a fit over it when I returned, telling me they felt shunned and uncared about. And yet they won't try to put in any work to engage wholly with me on my interests. It always has to be me the one who asks them to engage, to talk with me, to accommodate me. And I do it all for them unprompted way more often. They frame everything under the light of me being selfish and entitled, while I do so much for others. And it's never enough for them. The hardest part of living with my parents is knowing that they care and they love me and they still insist on hurting me. Maybe once I move out, that space will be enough for our relationship to start to mend.
I'm not looking for therapy in the youtube comment section, no I'm here to tell you all that there is hope, there is escape, and there is freedom. I know it and I reach for it daily, now harder than ever before. Not out of spite for my parents, but out of hope for a better life for myself.
I'm going to make it.
Fantastic video as always, hope things start looking up!
That absolutely sucks. I hope you get proper housing soon Lead! 😢
(Edit: Glad you did! 😊)
Nobody deserves that.
All my parasocial love. ❤
Edit: I have a similar sort of relationship with my father. He's different though. It's like he's bipolar.
Sometimes he's warm and jokey and nice and other time he snaps and explodes at you, he frequently calls me useless and explains away things I say as being due to me lacking or not taking my medication.
Basically he's an asshole and I'd love to leave but I can't right now.
My mum is fine but non-confrontational, so she never stands up to him. Thankfully he doesn't abuse anyone.
Recently came out as mtf and they were justifiably shocked, but it's difficult to grow into this except for in private as they require me to wait for a year or two to make sure I'm certain. I already know I'm certain. I'm 20 and every time I get hormone injections it's one more irreversible or hard to reverse change on my body.
I hope one day I can be independent like you, and support my own girlfriend. (If I can find her..)
Have a brilliant day and thank you for your work. I'm certain you were a big reason for me finally cracking my egg. Live well sis! ❤
I always seem to choke up with ICO video essays, but this one made me bawl my eyes out. Beautifully spoken.
Beautiful video writing as always
Ico is such a good game, its interesting how it was the only game that made me care about a ncp that i had to carry though the entire story
And its very interesting that art can make people relate so much with their own lifes
Wow! The editing is crazy! Also love your voice it’s very soothing to listen to and every time you say something it’s just so easy to keep listening to you and its sooo hard for me to keep attention (adhd) really well done with those colors it makes the video that much cooler! Always wondered about that game glad to learn about it here.
Sorry about your situation I can only imagine such a situation and doing such thing scares me at least you both have each other in these trying times
Glad someone mentioned the hidden co op mode
This is one of my fav games and my fav in uedas trilogy
Also I super understand the living situation, and feeling cramped I hope you and your partner will make it through,
Good job with the talking about the themes of the story
OMG MY CHILDHOOD GAME
This is my first video I have seen of you and this video made me subscribe
Beautiful video.
I needed this video, thanks.
Stay strong love❤
This video is so touching, it left me in tears. Thank you Leadhead! I'm so happy for you and your gf :)
Glad to hear you have your own space now, & hearing younger generations realise stuff that took me way longer to learn warms my heart. All the best!
Wonderful video!!
This shit abt to be fire
My first time engaging with games journalism was *GameTrailers* video on the legendary *_17 Colossus_* it showed me the indomitable spirit of humanity
@7:21 and also by way of crumbling infrastructure which feels apt somehow
I knew it would be good when it was about Ico, but you far exceeded my expectations! Thank you for your work! I applauded… by myself… in the bath 😂
This made me cry a little oopss
Edit: then you said coom slayer
Ooh I just replayed Ico last month! It's one of the earliest games I ever remember playing, and the dreamlike quality of it hasn't left me since
If there was ever a relatable video, wife and I had to to live at my parents home and is such a strain on the relationship to not be free. Its great to hear you are all back in your own place and you managed to cross that stressful bridge.
I'm so fucking proud of you by the way. In a distant queer solidarity kind of way
This one hit to deep. Thanks for the hid 😊
Congrats on the new Place!
Adding a comment for the algo so it helps too!
I'm so happy for you! I was tearing up when you said that this was being recorded from your new house. Wishing the best for you and your girlfriend ❤
This video hit HARD. Some years ago I had to move back with my parents after a 5 year relationship ended. Going crawling back was the second hardest thing I've ever had to do. The hardest was, for a multitude of reasons, actually living there. I didn't realize just how much it had effected my mental health until I was finally able to get a new place and spent my first night in it. It was like I'd been playing life on kaizo difficulty and was finally able to change it. Glad to hear that things are getting better for you!
Thanks a lot, an extremely touching experience !
FUCK YEAH YOU FUCKING GO and dont stop !!!!!!!
Like halfway through the video and ooh, we hittin close to home with this one, oh good lord
Thank you for sharing this very vulnerable story. And thank you for bringing this game into the conversation.
An added dimension to Yorda’s trauma, often glossed over in discussion, is that her mother is bilingual... and yet she only knows one language. One portrayed as hieroglyphs, an ancient language, a dead language. One that only her mother speaks...
To me, it's like knowing there's a woman in your strictly English/Spanish speaking neighborhood with a homeschooled daughter who only speaks Mandarin, because that's all she was allowed to learn.
The very nature of the game's language barrier is deeply uncomfortable under this lens. But it's also part of why the game feels so liberating everytime I replay it. Neither of these children deserve what has been laid out for them, and this game gives me the means to stop all that from coming to fruition.
I hope everything continues to go well for you and your partner too.
I love the way pull together your life and your love of video games.
Really happy to see you were able to find a new home 🏡
LOVE YOU!
yet another banger. typical leadhead W
"can you at least pretend to be thankful?"
God that fucking hits hard.
I watched this video, and have to say, the game can be an award winning film
new leadhead video 🔥🔥
yeah! she was so suprised!
Congrats!
A harrowing story for sure. I'm glad you've made it. Here's to new years of happiness and freedom
Ayy!! New vid!!
Am happy for you! Good luck!
your voice is so calming. it smells like marmalade, strawberry and banana. I express a lot of things like you do, but only inside, no one can or want to see it.. I dream of showing my true self, I hope I will leave my oppressive country before I become too old so I can look young and awesome like you and dress and look like I actually want all my life, like you do.
Beautiful video
CONGRATS ON THE HOME PENNY!!! Personal space is a tough one and I’m glad to see you got yours back
a leadhead ico video? i simply do not deserve this. can't wait to watch. SOTC is top 10 but never played a frame of ICO. let's go lead.
Happy you could find that person you can have the special experience of sharing a playthrough of a game you hold dear with.
Also, idk why this popped in my head but you're giving Death Note character.
ICO IS SO UNDERRATED😭❤️
I'm happy for you two!
incredible video
Congrats on the new house