Living Alone in Japan - furnishing my apartment, food montage & meeting Conan Gray (visual diary)

These were clips of January to March of 2023. There’s not much going on during those months (I literally lost track of time) except I prioritized slowly furnishing my apartment and also going to my first concert!!! How exciting! Conan Gray is one of the people who influenced me to document my life alongside Clahrah and my siblings, so having the chance to attend the concert was unbelievable. After that, I was back to my normal routine of learning to navigate life as an individual in another country and a few breakdowns are normal I guess.
These months were the time I was and still slowly adjusting to my new life by buying furniture to make my apartment my own safe space and learning to be an adult by budgeting (yet failing to do so). Being independent and also trying to be a responsible person, first thing to do is to clean your room. In my opinion, a clean room means a clear mind.
Thankfully, being a middle child, to say I easily got used to the routine of adulting is believable(?)
Having my own space and paying my bills with my money that I worked hard for is another topic I would say. It was very difficult. It is very challenging to pull yourself up and push yourself to be productive when you’re dealing with anxiety, depression, loneliness, and other sad emotions (in short: adulthood). And these clips would only show me that I was coping by eating lots of food (stress eating maybe) and taking videos of myself cleaning because that’s the only way to motivate me to move and clean.
But it also reminds me that even the smallest achievements and moments (even the mundane things) makes everything bearable. It reminds me of the spark in me that I usually think is gone, and when I edit these videos, I see and remember what I felt in that moment. I remember the feeling of accomplishment by doing laundry even though I just wanted to lay down all day, I remember the feeling of opening the curtain and seeing the sunset after cleaning the room, I remember the feeling of heaviness lifting up. And these feelings sparks joy in me and gives me hope and settles althe thought of “everything will be alright”. And I pray the same to everyone who can relate. #life
Romanticize your life, celebrate small victories that you only know but still pat yourself on the back because you are doing great, we all are. Let’s keep going!
-Joleeen 🍀

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Lezzgoooo!!

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Lezzzgooo zeze ❤