10 Signs Of A Low Value Woman | What Is A Low Value Woman?
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 13 มิ.ย. 2024
- Welcome back to my channel! In this video, I will discuss ten signs that may indicate a woman has low value in a relationship. Some of them are crucial for your relationships, so listen closely! Disrespect for men, false beliefs about patriarchy, issues in communication, clinginess, and many other things will be covered in the video.
My insights on this topic will help you recognize and address these potential red flags in your current or future relationships! Don't forget to leave a like and subscribe to the channel!
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Chapters:
00:00 Intoduction
00:46 Disrespecting men and her male partner in relationships
2:24 Not nurturing or lack of female empathy toward others
03:55 A woman that can't communicate like adult
05:08 Being clingy
07:01 Obsessed with attention
08:34 Connection between appearance and self-worth
10:22 She doesn't have a lot of lifelong friends
13:10 She is flirting with other men
13:59 The negative woman
15:35 Controlling woman
16:16 Conclusion - บันเทิง
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Number one should be "disrespecting anybody". Retail staff, servers in restaurants, anybody at all. She'll be dissing your friends, your family and her own children, if it gets that far.
I completely agree.
Absolutely.
You can tell a lot about someone's character by observing how they treat people from whom they don't need or want anything, and how they treat people who have less status than they have.
@@davepenn9181What status? It's all in their head, they ain't got no status or value... they only lie and pretend they have worth
I don't particularly respect disingenuous people. If you think that everyone is who they seem to be, then you are ripe for abuse.
A 10 in looks, but a 3 in personality is a 3! Natural beauty, modesty and a thoughtful, kind heart makes the best girlfriend. This has always been what I searched out.
Conversely, a 3 in looks but a 10 in personality can actually be a 10.
Spot on, brother!👍 All of the above (except looks), a low number is what it is! Someone with all of the great traits you mention, being a 9-10 on those, I can accept. While I do want a woman who takes care of herself, a 9-10 isn't necessary, however with all the other great traits, a woman who may be a 5-7 in looks may indeed be that 9-10 to me!❤❤❤
All I care about is love, happiness, togetherness, passion (even at 60!) & each of us doing our part to keep it that way. It takes two to make a couple!🙏🙏🙏
Nope, she's a 10. Just a 3 in personality.
Why is it always looks and personality anyway, and even IQ for some, and nothing about thoughtfulness? I guess that could be considered a part of her personality, but the word "personality" is usually used to describe only the external part.
@@devilsoffspring5519I think you just won an argument against yourself.
@@DoubleplusUngoodthinkful You might have a good point :) It's just that the word "personality" is usually used to describe only the externally-shown part of the human mind's functions.
Number 8 should be number 1. A woman flirting with other men in your presence is the ultimate in disrespect. When I was 48, I was dating a 24 year old. She was in graduate school and spoke 4 languages , so very intelligent.I never would have considered someone with such an age difference but she approached me at the gym and wanted to go out. I stopped seeing her because she would flirt with other men when we were on a date. A total deal breaker.
Good on you for walking away. Not too many guys willing to do it that, these days.
Yea you're damn right bro, average and low value B!t€e$ always do that no matter what their age is, ran away when ever you see this crap behaviour.. It's the instant and ultimate deal braker only low value, simp, loser would entertain this behavior from the who®es...
I dated a 20 year old when I was 33.. same deal. She would flirt with other guys and even my best friend who is my cousin. She slowly showed her true self over time and let me tell you, she was very bad. She said shit like, "I will ruin you if we ever break up!" Well.. she ruined herself time and time again after I dumped her. She's single and alone and the towns cum bucket last I heard..
Dating a woman half your age is just weird to me.
@@afridgetoofar1818 do you say the same for women dating guys half their age?
I’m 68 years old, I agree with your value system but in today’s world I’m pretty sure I would avoid the whole dating scene!!
It isn't easy but at 74 I'm still trying
I am 72 and still trying.@@robertbiolsi9815
I'm 69. Looking poor is in my nature anyway but, I go beyond that. Women our age statistically have less money and they have more debt. I'm not saying they're gold diggers but, they may be asking themselves often about what they're going to do about their money problem.
It's nothing compared to even 20 years ago and I'm only 41.
The kids aren't alright.
H. L. Mencken - 'Bachelors know more about women than married men; if they didn't they'd be married too.'
11th sign: The low value woman tells me she is living on a monthly disability payment due to diagnosed mental illness caused by alcoholism.
Agree with this. Drugs and alcoholism are deal breakers, unless they've been sober for years. Even then I would proceed with caution.
@@kennithminnich Yep. Total, absolute deal breaker, regardless of what else she might bring to the table.
That's not a sign, that's an entire road block.
Hospitality is so huge with me. It’s not necessarily a 7 course meal. Sometimes it’s just a glass of water at the right time.
A hug and a hot cup of coffee ☕️ goes a long way indeed...
Sometimes hospitality is leaving me alone and I'll have a bag of chips for dinner if that's what I feel like--if I feel like any dinner that day at all.
A woman with more hetero male friends than females is a huge red flag. I dont care if her reason is "women are too jealous" or "catty". Something is going on there.
I second this. You could not be more correct. A friend pointed out that usually this happens because no other woman wants her around her man because she is a piece of you know what, which is why most girls will not have anything to do with her
I would split these in to two to three groups. A girly girl with mostly male friends is a red flag. This is the majority. But a tomboy with mostly male friends, thats quite a bit different. One is deliberately hanging out with people that have dissimilar hobbies. The other has a friends group with similar hobbies. A chick thats in to something like dirt track racing is just not going to find many female friends. There is also another group of women that are less emotional an more scientific minded. They really dont get along with the average emotional women. But a lot of these are also tomboys. Not to say that something is not going on in the second twos friends groups, but it sure is in the first one.
@@RebelCowboysRVs good evaluation
Not always.. some girls just don't like hanging out with other girls because of being too judgmental and always playing games.. they would rather be around guys who give them attention but it doesn't mean they're whores or sluts it just means they feel more comfortable around males.. our very narrator of this video had more guy friends than girlfriends she seems like she's got her head screwed on straight
@@RebelCowboysRVsI'm an autistic woman and I have like 4 friends, 3 of them being guys, but I hang out with none of them because life sucks with situation/circumstances. Would hate to think men think this is a red flag simply based on the surface level.
I hate the whole men feel less bullshit. We don't feel less. We just have spent our life having to control our emotions. If we don't people get hurt, property gets damaged and police get called. If we open up to women a lot of them use it against us. We learn these lessons early by experience and or through seeing it happen to those around us.
I'm very emotional as a guy, BUT most of the time I keep it controlled. And a lot of times it manifests as enthusiasm for work or other goals not necessarily the sappy shit that women are known for.
Sounds like you have mommy issues.
I agree with you. Women in the west have fostered unemotional men because we get VERY severely punished by women if we ever show any to them
We're taught to be tough. "Suck it up, buttercup!" Works great in combat and other high-pressure situations, and it can give comfort to those around us when the shit hits fan. But it comes at a cost. It took me until my 50's to allow myself to acknowledge my feelings - that I had some, and that they should matter to anyone who claims to care about me.
@@davepenn9181 imagine what it's like being married to someone like that.
A healthy amount of being clingy is a sign of interest and love. Very much welcomed.
My wife is "High value" af honestly, we are near 6 years strong and the few negative traits she possessed are things she's actively working on, and encourages me to do the same in a very healthy way. I love this woman
Power couple
Check back in 16 years, 26, 36 etc
@@toddjohnson271 idk what you're trying to say lol
@@jgibson9989 She can change.....all my buddies in their 40's are divorced after 20 years.
I was on cloud 11 during 2 yrs until things started later. Sometimes a narcissist does love bombing and man has no clue.
I don't think that if a woman won't leave the house without makeup, it necessarily means her appearance is tied to her self-worth. My wife refuses to go anywhere without makeup. She's not trying to attract anyone and if her self-worth were tied to her appearance, she'd wear it at home too. She simply wants to be presentable, something that people used to do in past decades. I equate it to not wanting to go to Walmart in your pajamas.
haha
Powder and colored long lasting chapstick is a presentable look to take care of your daily responsibilities.👩
No mention of multiple tats and piercings?
😂Yep!
Guess she figures that Speaks for itself haha
Ole Rich Cooper hammers that point home relentlessly.😂
I don't mind the look of the tattoos, but too often do you find women with tattoos to be mentally unstable.
You mentioned the price you pay for dating a "10"...I once dated a "10" lady (3rd runner-up Miss California), and we had a way of interacting that you might find interesting. I also grew up with a mom who was "the prettiest girl at her high school," and I had learned to deal with the kind of manipulative tactics such women learn. So when I was out with this lady and she pulled some of her stuff on me, I immediately knew what was going on. So instead of falling for it, I would treat it as a joke and mimic it back to her. This had never happened to her before, and instead of getting angry, this girl was so surprised that she broke out into gales of laughter! She thought it was the funniest thing she had ever seen, and ever after that, as long as we dated, she would explode into laughter every time I would mimic back to her her manipulative tactics. In fact, I don't think I ever laughed with any woman as much as I did with this gal, and although she did play the dumb blonde to a tee (which I mimicked back to her constantly to gales of laughter) she turned out to be actually wayyyy smarter than she let on. I did "pay the price," though. She ran off with a guy who had a million dollars. Just one of my stories....
The prettier she is, the harder she'll work to conceal her intelligence, simply because the 'top tier' men she's mingling with, whether she wants to or not, have no interest in it, and other women will use the knowledge to socially thrash her. It's similar to how very handsome players will completely suppress their romantic side. Both of them also do it as a defense.
You didn't pay the price - The guy w/the million dollars paid the price...
Actually, I don't think he got her either....@@nelsonzambrano5788
Most 10s are super high maintenance and more of a hassle than their worth. You can bet if there is a mirror near by she will ALWAYS find a way over to it no matter the circumstance. Guys are much better off getting with a 6 or 7..
@@gc4644 Problem is even 6s are becoming high maintenance.... Thank the body positivity movement.
Sarah missed a couple:
11) narcissistic - she wants to be the center of the universe. Her ego will not allow you to tell her that she's wrong when she's clearly wrong, like the sky being blue when she says it's red. Just the way she expects you to cater to her wants and desires.
12) dream killers - everyone has hopes, dreams and desires. We keep them to ourselves and go after them. Without them, life can get meaningless pretty fast. But when you tell them to a dream killer? They will spend all their energy, time and effort trying to convince you and tell you that's not possible it's a bad idea, etc. Even if it's entirely within your grasp. Those people will make your life hell and suck the soul right out of you.
When a woman says to you something like “I’m a mess” or “my life is a wreck” you really need to listen to her. It’s a moment of truth. Very likely she doesn’t like herself much.
“I hate drama!” Often just means she does like drama from others but her drama is fine.
Party girls are a lot of fun… if they aren’t YOUR girlfriend.
Don’t worship her, or any person for that matter. (unless you want to be in a cult)
No is a beautiful word. Boundaries are necessary.
Or maybe she likes herself too much.
As a woman, I 100% agree with your list. This is spot on.
I have been blinded by beauty and lights once. That did not end well. She ditched me three months after being married.
😡
As a man i do NOT mind clingy at all. I tend to value one woman relationships and always love to interact with her. If a woman isnt clingy, it's actually a turn off for me. Other guys may be different
I found they can go from clingy to "Where are you? Who with? Doing what?" rather quickly.
Clingy isn't bad on the surface but usually has other underlying problems.
There absolutely will be times in your life when you need to be by yourself or with other men for a day or so. You don't want clingy, trust me. You want a woman who can occupy herself for that time and be happy about it. Missing you? Sure, that's great. Checking up on you all the time? No.
@@gregvanpaassen I absolutely agree and get that at work or at home when she's working
@@longsword1969 There is also a difference in being "clingy" in the 'honeymoon' early days of the realtionship when you just want to be with each other.. but yeah, after it calms down abit, the clingly-ness needs to taper down.
Not having a friend circle doesn't necessarily count as low value or a red flag. What if us authentic types have come across many types whos values do not aligne with ours? I am 40 married with 2 kids, i love my little family with all my being. However outside of home life i do feel quite lonely, 10 years back i had lots of issues pertaining to unresolved truma / ptsd ect. I was a very different man to who i am today. Over the years i ve had to clear many ppl out of my life, true i could have done some things better & there are a few aspects that i still need some work with. Some of the loneliest ppl sometimes turn out to be the most trustworthy. I feel its becoming almost impossible to trust anyone now, seems like most not all, enjoy only the convenience our presence offers them. Only time & real testing situations reveal whos who. Set boundaries be fearless, love yourself & stay true to your values even if it makes you unpopular or lonely. Authenticity will drew the few and repel the many
Agree. I have a very small circle. I don't dislike people, but I do tire quickly of games and drama.
@Hawkeye2001 it's so difficult to relate to anyone nowadays, isn't it. I have a few friends but hardly see or hear from them. Agree I prefer tranquillity growth, peace & discipline. I see any toxic behaviour. Sure, I will stop & check first to make sure I am not contributing to said toxicity. Once a pattern of pathology is established, I speak out and walk away. Like you say, there is no time for drama. Sure, peace sometimes has to be fought for via healthy conflict. How many now take accountability for their actions, words, etc, plus its this "me v you" attitude rather than 2 people v a problem, which is a huge deal breaker
@@Hawkeye2001men typically have smaller friend groups than women
" I feel its becoming almost impossible to trust anyone now,"
So, you are the only good person in the whole world?
@jamese9283 No, of course not. I am no more perfect than the average person. I have strengths & flaws, yet I believe in transparency & a code of keeping things real. None of us are error free. We all have made unhealthy choices at some point in our lives. The question becomes, "Do we let our past define our future?" Strong boundaries will always reveal who's who, so if someone corrects me & is able to offer advice which helps me grow and improve, then I am truly grateful. We all have a right to be loved & respected, like all things, there has to be a reciprocal nature to proceedings
Good advice. What caught my ear was, 'showing your curves without showing skin'. Right on target, bulleye. Drives my crazy. Love it.
You’re right, I liked what Sarah said about this, I don’t know at which stage my wife is in her mind that she has to show cleavage to feel like a woman, I mean.. can you respect me like a husband and pull up your blouse, at church!!?? I’m 45 and she’s 52.
I'm SO GLAD you differentiated clingy from co-dependant. Personally I'd swap them around and say co-dependant is bad and clingy is OK.
However my point is, being 'clingy' and wanting to hear from / be with your man / updated by your man etc are signs of possessiveness and submissiveness, which are both great signs for a female partner to have. She WANTS to be with you. Of course there's a limit. But generally as a dominant man I've found clingyness to be a good sign of a submissive, loving partner.
9:42 Respect for injecting the word “vapid” into the discussion.
Vocabulary matters. ⭐️
My dad and my grandfather had a few good pieces of advice for when finding a woman to date. The first 1 being look at her mother, since 9 out of 10 times she ends up like her. So if her mom is a good woman then typically you are good. The next was find a woman who has the same values as you. This will lead to less fights over all and lead to a better relationship. My grandparent on my dad's side where married till death till they parted. My grandpa died 2 years after my grandma died from a broken heart.
That's a pretty comprehensive list Sarah, and I sure would have loved having someone like you explain it to me when I was a young man. I'm an old man now, I was in five long term relationships and I have been married three times; that's a whole lifetime of relationship misery and I consider that my parents and educators just left me to fend by myself like a babe in the woods and there are a lot of she-wolves out there. Curreently I have been married over 20yrs to a woman I first knew in nursery school; we share a lot of common history and values but our relationship has been an uphill battle all the way. As such, our marriage has been a great education session in self respect and Love for both of us. Your comments are pretty much, right on the button as far as I can see from the perspective of my 76 years. Thank you for your great work.
Yeah, I must say, this was pretty insightful. Most women don't pick up on these behaviours. I have disagreed with Sarah on a few of her videos, but she got pretty much all spot on. I don't think the "Communicate like an Adult" is exactly right, it is somewhere between childish and unintellectual, but close enough. Sad to say my wife has demonstrated all 10 in our time together. The real trick is to just keep calling it out. Giving up the fight makes it much worse.
We get older, but the problems don't change, somewhere ther was a caveman zoning out wondering, what the fuk is that girl talking about? Much respect sir.
19 years of marriage, w/ 3 separations (went back for the kids) 1 other long term (and long distance) relationship.
My parents were given a Shotgun Marriage. This was before divorce and women's lib and abortions. Yup, they didn't do anything to prepare me for life or relationships. In fact they took me 3000 miles away from any family that would have been helpful. As role models of marriage and relationships themselves, Genghis Khan couldn't have been worse.
You have these traits when a man cheats on you
@@simonemedley922 it's mostly women doing the slimey cheating thing, then coming home to your marital bed and acting like nothing wrong,but meanwhile everything's wrong. And the women start picking fights, cutting off the husband or boyfriend from sex, and not caring what she is doing to the family and relationship. It happens all the time, and im glad that videos like this are out to help men realize what may be happening in their relationship, and to know that they're NOT crazy, or being ridiculous or possessive. Nah, women are mostly the ones doing the cheating and lying and destroying of families. Guys are simple, real simple, just give us some action once in awhile. Even once a week would be OK, but no, women want to play games with that, but will open up shop to a guy who doesn't give 2 fks about her.
Early on I thought having things in common was what made a good relationship. Later I figured out that the things that compliment each other are of the utmost importance. And if you can recognize your partner’s strengths and let them employ them at the right time, you become a very strong couple and will have a strong marriage.
My grandmother call these “no account.”
I don't have many close friends as any spare time I have, I'd rather spend with my family. I don't think that makes me a strange person !!
Your time is the most precious thing you can give someone, and my family are the most precious people to me.
This is definitely your best video yet. Really practical advice that hits home.
Early on talking to a girl I ask her about her family. If she trashes on her family I move on. I also ask if she likes living in the city I happen to live in, if she goes straight into how she hates it and wants to leave I will also move on. I love where I live and have no intention of leaving.
I've personally seen this one. If she wears a tee shirt that says, "The Future is Female", AVOID!
A little clinginess is alright it's much better than someone who ignores you and that has one word responses for everything and gives condescending responses when you do manage to get a few words out of them.
I was with my ex for 27 years. She never wanted to sit close to me or touch me, unless it was sex, (we did have a good sex life at least). I even had other girls comment to me about how "cold" she was to me. I always brushed it off, now in hindsite I was the one who was DUMB for being there.
Really happy that young guys have wise teachers like Sarah these days. Wish I had this knowledge 25yrs earlier 😅
Sarah… thank you for your unveiling of the women’s world and mind/ chaos. I’ve been married to these 10 things for 10 years. I know I have my flaws, but women… they really know how to throw a wrench into the gears. Some women, not all. I’m a hard working man, Mexican, and am tired. Would like to be with a woman that is not negative.
My Filipina wife is very clingy and I love it…. Thank you Sarah for doing your part to stop gender hatred. America men and women need to start enjoying and respecting each other. My wife doesn’t understand why they hate each other…She thinks it’s kinda foolish.
I feel sad seeing so many men hate women and vice versa - women hating men. It's heartbreaking. I wish everyone would take responsibility to heal themselves so they can see the value in others, just their fellow humans. With an open heart instead of closed 💗
At age 20, I was with a woman who had ALL 10 signs, and then some! It was a living hell! It was all about the veeeee. 😂 That was her only redeeming quality. I used to get yelled at if I didn't run to a payphone, WHILE AT WORK, when my pager went off. I was supposed to jump down off a 3-story roof and run to the phone! Friends would always tell me she would ride around with her ex while I was at work every day. My buddy called him, "her security blanket". Truth! What an embarrassing & painful time for me. Thankfully I can laugh about it now. Been married 20 years (To someone else, thankfully!) this coming May, and it's all been good since. Took a LOOONG time to find a good one! Of course, I was broken, too, so I had to fix myself first. That's an ongoing project that'll never end, lol.
I remember pay phones and pagers. You date yourself, sir!
@@WardDorrity 😂Indeed!
To your point number seven, I am completely blind, and don't have a lot of close friends. I have found that many people either don't know how to relate with me, or are too afraid to approach me in social settings. Appreciate your content.
It's a weird thing, tbh. I've been both places. Went from always alone to meeting acquaintances everywhere on a short walk through the city, and back.
Learned a lot about people, but most of it seems to have been surpassed by time.
We'll see how it goes.
I disagree with #7. My wife of 30 years has few friends but she never speaks poorly of other women. She is just a quiet introvert. She is kind of a nerd who prefers reading books over socializing. This is the only sign of the 10 you list where she gets a guilty checkmark but I don't think her lack of many friends has hurt our relationship over the last 30 years at all. I have few friends as well so I guess maybe we are both "low value" people?
Actually, I think most people in the world today have few REAL friends. I have lots of acquaintances and several what I would call "fair weather" friends but that's about it.
You missed a lot of the nuance on #7. As she said in the video, having any 1 of the 10 is not bad. Having few to no friends is not healthy for most people. It is good for anyone to have a trusted different perspective on life. Social skills can be learned. Nothing wrong with being an introvert, but you should look for chances to pick up some new friends. It can be refreshing.
I’m not dating anyone now and not really interested in having a relationship, but I’m watching a lot of dating and relationship videos lately, and… I really enjoyed this video, Sarah! From the way you presented the points we (men) can all relate to, to your talking and presentation style (with good pace, and often, when you said “that’s the kind of woman you want”, I went “yes!”), to your sense of humor and sometimes not hesitating to poke fun at yourself… I enjoyed and am enjoying it all! Subscribing now! 😎❤️
The whole friend circle is complete BS. My parents and my grandparents have had the best marriage throughout their whole lives without any friends at all. I believe friends do more harm than good in most cases, when it comes to relationships and marriages.
A corollary to not having maintained friendships, is a woman who's rapidly hopped from one job to another, by quitting or getting fired, for years on end. She may claim that at the last employer, where she only lasted a couple of months, "everyone was out to get me" or that "my boss was a cunt/asshole" or "they wouldn't listen to any of my ideas." She may be really poor at working through conflict or adversity. She may be extremely disagreeable. She may be unable to regulate her emotions. She may be a drama/conflict instigator. Whatever the dynamic, it's a huge red flag.
That's a red flag for men and women.
I was going to make this comment with a lot less explaining.
* Not ALL women are good at domestic tasks. Some are better suited for intellectual or spiritual pursuits.
* EVERY TIME we have an issue where it is "I" who is having a disagreeable experience, then it is "I" who's ego needs readjusting. As in owning ALL of my ego's emotional dysfunctions. She may doing exactly what she is here to do, and my ego may be freaking distorted in a way for me to blame her instead of being emotionally responsible. And maybe you're incapable of ALL that.
Bro that was my ex she had about 5 different jobs within a year and a half
You are describing one of my good buddies ex to a "T"!!!!!
Love the way you keep it real. I've been dating now for over ten years since my wife died, and have seen all the the ten signs you list in various quantities in numerous women. All caused me to pull the plug on the toxic mess that I would not allow into my life. At this point I've pretty much thrown the towel in on dating. I figure I gave it a decade's worth of time, effort, and money, so now it's time to fully accept the enjoyable bachelor life I lead. I still enjoy watching videos like yours now and again to reinforce my conclusion. Thx.
Absolutely agree 100%
I'm in my 50's and its been over 6 years. I really expext to be by myself the rest of my life, I not tall, not good looking, and don't have a lot of money. I do like horses and dogs tho, and they are good pals. lol.
You’re absolutely on point accurate with the points you outlined. Even though some people and different situations may have different words or titles for these separate categories but regardless they relate the same. Great video.
Sarah, you are fantastic! I really really like you, because you are so natural, so honest and straight forward, and especially, you are totally free from all the crasy ideas that come from the very woke world that we have around us. Especially when you talk about the differences between the sexes, you are always spot on. I am a 68 year old guy from Sweden, and I can only confirm that everything that you say, not only in this video, is soo true! Thank you!
Better for a man to live alone in a small cabin than in a mansion with a modern woman.
Excellent video. Sarah Dawn you're amazing!
# 11 High body count (Edit - cannot effectively pair bond any longer)
That is more of a deeper tell of the #5 "Obsessed with attention". Especially if you don't know her body count. Cause when you think about it, those with high body counts are probably obsessed with attention.
She won’t admit to body count because she knows her’s is too high. She had a hoe phase and doesn’t want to own it.
Should be #1.A criterion, but hey it's youtube...
And a High BC often correlates with a Low Value Woman ie: most of the points presented.
Also contrary to the feminist view of " it shows she is an empowered Woman " it actually shows in most cases that she has a low self esteem and those where they have a high self esteem you are probably dealing with a Narcissistic or Sociopathic PD with the accompaning manipulative traits.
my ex had 9 of these traits and an average BC but higher than me.She could still couple bond with me and I stayed with her longer than any preceding guy and afterwards as well(I left because of the Jealousy and Controlling aspects - she had Bipolar PD.
after we split she went on a high BC binge for 7 years without settling down until she hooked up with a much younger guy she married but that ended up lasting a bit shorter than my tenure with her. I have stayed with the same lady since we split( she has 1 of the 10 traits and a low BC- a completely different experience over 20 years vs the 5 years of rollercoaster relationship.)
my ex does seem to have settled down but not due to "finding a man" actually due to her grandchildren( she was married before she met me as was the current lady in my life).
@@jacquesc3166 Definetly in the top 3.
Blue, green, red, orange or purple hair.
Watching this... something hit me... and YES, the second part will offend someone...
I WANT a honey-do list... However, I cannot work on an empty stomach... make me a sammich...
I could have phrased it differently... but heck, if I am going to offend, I may as well sink the titanic!
Great advise! Thank you!
If women were getting paid less than men, then I want only women in my company, job description, hard labor construction, oh sometimes we don't have a bathroom on site.
Women are held back due to taking maternity leave and women are generally the ones that stay home with kids. The ones that aren't going to get promotions due to upcoming leave or the fact that sick kids mean the women will most likely miss more work.
Women are held back if they have kids.
Ignoring that, sure, women are paid equally. Lol
They're totally fine with that "inequality".
I agree with you. What you have said, I know I have to work on myself better and you have helped thru my healing. Thank you
Number 7 should be moved up higher. The ability to maintain friendships is extremely telling.
Agree 100%. I once dated a woman who wanted to interview a few of my friends. Partially to verify that I had some. I happily agreed and said I'd like to interview a few of her friends as well. Of the 3 contacts she gave me, only one responded to my query. And a conversation with that person, revealed that he hadn't had any contact with her for several years and they were never very close. I should have heeded this red flag since it would have shown her for the narcissist she was. And that she used people until she used them up and then she burned them to the ground.
Exception: Military service. You're moving every 2-3 years, possibly with deployments added in. No opportunity to build long-term friendships. You may run into people you've known before, and that's usually cool, but you don't form close friendships -- or you learn to accept that friendships are temporary.
Equally bad or worse IMO is if she has 2-3 lifelong close friends, & they're all toxic / in dysfunctional relationships and/or they're 304s. BIG red flag.
@@Deavertexyep, I moved around a lot & was in the military. I've stayed in touch with some ppl, lost touch with others. Many ppl treat ppl as "friends of convenience" & "we'll hang out because you're here now" but you won't matter once you're out of sight. My long term friends are now scattered across the US so it's not like I can go hang out with my besties as I please. It's incredibly hard to make new friends now because ppl are more anti-social or openly rude. It's even harder when ppl have the judgement of "oh this person doesn't have friends so there must be something wrong." The added irony is those aren't the kinds of ppl I would even want to try to get to know lol. So it's become a very odd cycle of no local friends = added hindrance to make new ones.
@@davepenn9181kind of weird to interview friends as a credit bureau😮
Thank you for your incites. This video and "Dating after divorce" directly addresses my personal issues.
You mean insights, the other is their highest skill
Men want love, affection and respect from their mate. It’s a simple as that. And so many women are unwilling to give it. Also, if a woman is disrespectful to others, even though she seems to be respectful to you, that is a big red flag, that she will eventually treat you the same way.
Sara, I was trying to think about the last time I had a relationship like you describe. It was 1975. It’s now 30 dates and two marriages later. I had and saw those in High School and college but never now.
I got so tired on one dating app where many women would say they hated “players” but then talked about how they still like to flirt.
I rejected one woman for that reason and she protested it was not the same thing. I agreed it wasn’t until a guy took the bait, but that’s no different than the way a “player” uses flattery, charm and charisma. He’s just being “nice” until she takes the bait. Women often have such big blindspots about how they act. I think low value women think (or realize) they are competing against free porn now and try to lure (flirt with) men by advertising they are the live version. Some may be but they will never accept the man not paying for a “date”. Porn wins that argument every time. lol
While I understand men are stereotypically less emotional, I don't think it's true at all. As far as I can tell, we're just as emotional, but we're met with very different reactions when we try to express those emotions or seek support. We have to learn to control them in ways that women don't and we learn to hide them in order to present an image that's acceptable to the world around us
Not just that but men have their own outlet to go through their emotions and it is different for men than it is for women.
A guy can settle in after a hard day and do nothing. He can watch TV without watching it, his brain can turn off and he just zones out.
Women don’t do this.
"Maybe she was homely growing up and developed a charming personality to compensate. Now that she's blossomed, she still has the personality."
~ Shallow Hal.
These ladies are called unicorns. If you find one, do not scare her off. We want to catch her and study her so that the production process can be replacated.
There's a bit of irony that can come with "the ugly duckling" situation. When you dismiss an attractive person as "potentially problematic" on looks alone & don't bother even speaking to them, how would you know if they're vapid, shallow & snobby? When ppl assume "they must get compliments all the time so I won't say anything", maybe they never actually hear it? When ppl assume "they'll just reject me so I won't even try", some never get approached because everyone is too scared to try. There are even some ppl who assume "they must skate by on their looks so I'm going to knock them down a peg." Do you know that that does to a person when it happens repeatedly? It instills the belief that they're ugly no matter what which gives way to things like facial & body dysmorphia. That's something you can't see. Not everyone is focused with plastering their face on social media for validation so not everyone is living the instathot life either. You thinking they do because of what other ppl do doesn't make that a fact.
You can't dictate another person's reality or mindset based on the way they look. You actually have to speak to someone to find out who they are. This goes for both men & women. I've known ppl from either side who's self-perception of their appearance does not fit with what others think.
A relationship is like any other investment. You have to gauge what is the return in investment (ROI). A common refrain today is what do you bring to the table. I am 61, retired, divorced 20 years, and happy. Why would I want to invite drama, accusations, criticism, nagging, and problems into my life only to lose half my stuff at the end? What's in it for me? Relationships rarely pencil out. It's no wonder that 50% of them fail.
Sage advice. Really enjoy your messages.
Wow Sarah, thanks!
So you just described someone 'i used to know.
Your point about repeating mistakes is well taken.
Like your frankness. Very refreshing.
Thanks for this informative video 🙏
Great advice! Sadly, I have repeatedly fallen into bad situations with narcissistic women throughout my life. I’m actually starting therapy next week in hopes of trying to make better choices.
Most people are selfish, both men and women, so it may not be your fault. It's simply hard to find someone with the skills to get along with anyone long term.
Excellent comments keep up the good work I hope to follow you. I may the angels keep you in good health.
People generally refer to acquaintances as friends. Friends spend time with each other, not simply exchange texts.
I love that there is no background music. It makes your video more interesting.
Very informative, thanks!!
Your videos are always so beneficial!
Awesome loved the advice
This woman has great insight just as Pearl ! Good job lady ! Keep speaking up !
Wow that was really good information Sarah, thank you.
Your content is simply great. Much love from 🇩🇪❣️
Great video. Thanks
Insightful and correct. There are others, but this is quite a good list. A great starting point for women to be accountable to their actions and words.
I can’t believe how many of these my ex fit into. It’s just crazy. You make so much sense and I am very aware and know what I am looking for hopefully in a future relationship. Your videos are greatly appreciated by me and I thank you for spelling it out. You rock in my opinion 😊
Great list thank you
Thank you Sarah!
Appreciate you. Thankyou for all your help.
The only one that my ex wife ended up fitting in these categories was flirting with other men in front of me and I never had any inclination that she did it when I wasn’t around because she was such a controlling person the only free time I had was when she would be at work or at college otherwise she would blow my phone up non stop until I was home. I slowly got isolated from my friend group of actually hanging out but I made sure to keep in touch with everyone. She was really good at masking many of these negative traits but without actually seeing the first 2-3 of the list where the only ones that showed at the beginning.
The problem is these problems
Appears five to six months in. Never on the first date or when it does it’s very easy to avoid .
Good video Sara! I wish i would of known this a long time ago
Good Video!! Very Informative 😮❤
Here's one of my deal-breakers--when she doesn't smile, or smile easily, I don't care how great she looks. I'm gone.
I think that's a bit shallow. Smiles are easy; extending yourself (picking up from the airport at 10 P.M. ) is more difficult. Serious does not always mean unkind.
Doesn't cost anything to smile, @@FlamingCockatiel If she can't manage that small gesture, it's not out of the question that she wouldn't think twice about withholding physical intimacy. I stand by my standard.
@@hookalakah You never know what's going on in someone's life. A lot of people have lost a lot in the past years. A lack of smiling is normal in response to stress. I've faced multiple bouts of unemployment, and the uncertainty of the job search, plus the worry about being able to provide for myself and save for retirement, these are stressors never far from the surface. You can't just smile those problems away.
Also consider that some people just naturally smile less often than others. What might make others grin evokes smaller smiles but not necessarily less enjoyment.
Thank you very much for this information. It can be applied to many personal relationships, including those with men.
Great list. So true everything is there at the beginning if you look a little further. Number 2 is extremely important. Noticing if she cares and acts to meet your needs; or if she is selfish. Same goes with your need to share little things; does she respond to even small bids or does she ignore you and prefer her phone. Your glass example is so true. Another one which is important but difficult is her past relationships; are people in and out after a year or two. Also is she fair with money or do you find yourself paying for more. At the end do you have peace of mind and are you really happy.
Wow my most recent ex nailed 9 of the 10 red flags plus being disrespectful to others, once she got comfortable enough around me to let the real her shine through. The only one she didn't do was flirt with other men in front of me, but she would come home from working as a waitress and tell me about all the guys flirting with her while she was working, so kind of the same I guess.
And if you called her on it, she'd say she needed to flirt to get tips (and then the shaft).
@@thesuperioraffection4502 if she was younger, maybe. But she was north of 50 and looked older than her actual age even though she spent tons of money on age defying makeup, that she spent 2 hours or more per day putting on before leaving the house for anything. I think it was more of a self denial/jealous of the rest of the 20 something serving staff and she did it to try and feel better about herself.
I didn't have the heart, nor did I care enough, to tell her the "age-defying" stuff did not work as advertised.
Overall she had a lot of self loathing problems and chose to take "the make everyone around her at least as miserable as her path", as opposed to identifying and working on her issues.
We were together less than a year, and it quickly became apparent after she moved in that she was not the loving and caring person that she seemed to be. With in a month of her turning 50, it became apparent that cranky, mean and racist person she became, was not a temporary "change of life phase", but the real her. I confronted her with it, gave her a month to see if that made any difference, and then told her I was happier and way less lonely being single than in a relationship with her and that it was time for her to move on.
I've dated quite a few tens and usually we got along great but whenever I dated a less attractive woman there were always issues with their insecurities . Seems they were always jealous of me.
The last one is the worse. I've seen them all. You are right, Sarah.
I love the touchy feely nurturing one .
Hey Sarah Dawn. You're GORGEOUS!!!!!
Thanks a ton Sarah. So practical. As always I will ask.. Please Give us a chorus of Let it be.
WOW, it's Roger Moore's grand daughter! These are great points, well done!
Sarah for the win!💪👍
Ms. Moore is a bright lady who is wise about relationships 😊
Thank you!
There is no paygap, its a mith. If factored job to job women make more in almost all fields.
And it costs more to employ women. The insurance is significantly more expensive. If women could do the same job cheaper, who would employ men? Business is about profitability. If all that stuff were true, I would not hire men in my plumbing business.
They always said that lie because female dominated fields like child care pay less than male dominated engineering...
they literally want babysitting to pay the same as a c level executive.
Great video. Nice to hear this info from a level headed person. Healthy men need confirmation like this.
Solid list.
Very enlightening !
Thank You Sarah Dawn .