Yeah we need to stop mom-shaming and let them raise their kids their own way because every kid is different! As long as the parent is not abusing or harming their kid let them discipline (or not) however they want.
Parents should discipline their children to teach them a lesson - these kids already know they've done something wrong and are willing to even pay up their pocket money to help fix it: lesson learnt plus extra credit! Any further punishment would be overkill and come from a place of anger and not teaching.
The lesson is only learnt if they actually paid for the vase not by saying they would by mouth cause teachers a lesson of if you break things anywhere like a store or even a friends house pay for it cause they bought it with money as well. You don't get to walk out of the store freely just by saying sorry like the mom in the clip is teaching her children
I need people to realize that discipline does not equal hitting your child. They are obviously good parents, the kids fessed up.and offered to pay. Its better than what I would have done at that age
I agree. I feel like they've been disciplined enough already to fess up and try and pay. They are still kids and mistakes will happen. Parents seem to be doing a great job. They were remorseful.
Whenever I think of disciplining I automatically think of hitting/beating because that’s the only way I was disciplined from age 3 to 17. I got perfect conduct reports throughout my whole childhood. My parents were very physically abusive especially my dad.
Exactly. I'm against corporal punishment, because in my experience, beatings were done out of anger and teaching fear moreso than trying to teach self-regulation and self-discipline. I also learned enough psychology to be successful at tutoring and babysitting without having to deal with behavior issues. The children want to cooperate so they can enjoy learning and playing. Edit: Also, I remember being little, so I know children are smart and can understand if you just talk to them (of course, use language accessible to them). I communicate well with the toddlers I babysit, bc I put in effort to understand them.
I walked on eggshells growing up because my parents would rage over every little mishap, and I developed severe emotional problems that only worsened in adulthood. I couldn't cope with negative emotions and would berate myself whenever things would inevitably go wrong. Be careful when "diciplining" your kids--however you treat them when they make mistakes is how they will react to their own mistakes.
Agreed. I had the same upbringing as you and I have bad emotional problems now as an adult. It's hard for me to cope with stress at 32 years old. I have anxiety and depression disorders
@@Tan87ful Lisa A Romano on TH-cam really helped me--she taught me that what happened in childhood wasn't my fault, and there wasn't actually ever anything wrong with me. Developing compassion for yourself is essential. I'm sorry that happened to you. Recovery is possible. Best of luck.
Sara Russo I completely agree my parents (especially my dad) was extremely physically abusive as a form of “disciplining” me. If I didn’t run across the house fast enough in three seconds when he counted I would get beaten. If I did not re-use a towel 4 times before washing it I would get beaten. People don’t realize that how you raise a child permanently affects them- for better or for worse- for the rest of their life.
100% agree with Tamera. They acknowledged their error and communicated it. It’s different if they tried to hide it and be sneaky (like I was when I was a kid,lol) . And another thing, discipline doesn’t mean “physical” punishment.
AMEN!! Unfortunately physical punishment is seen as the norm in a lot of black households. My mom was always quick to whoop when I was a kid. As a result I have issues that I’m dealing with as an adult such as second guessing myself and always feeling like I’m not good enough. When I have children, I’m gonna break the cycle.
Awe i thought that was cute how they chipped in their own money 😂😭 but honestly they’re just kids and realized what they ddI wrong and apologized and offered to help pay to fix it and as far as consequences go i agree with Amanda they should repair the wall themselves. You’re supposed to teach kids right from wrong & then have them right their wrong. Hitting them solves nothing
@@lyricgirl2012 If your kid has shown you that they're sorry and they try to resolve the issue, what more do you want from them? If they haven't you need to find a new way to discipline them. Whether that's taking something away, a lecture, a punishment, whatever it is.
I don't think they were talking specifically hitting. Discipline could be many ways. And I also think it depends on what they did. You can't just apologize for the wrong things you do and think the consequences are now wiped away. As for this one incident, I would just let them fix the wall.
Actually hitting let's them know their actions are wrong by causing physical pain when they do stupid things of this sort. Experiments have proven that this works. Obviously going overboard is a nono but a lil spanking goes a long way when it's needed.
😂😂 Gotta love Jeannie--- Asian Culture is very similar to African culture! Try that in an African home, and you will find a way to rewind to yesterday! Our parents don't play 😂👏🏾
@@jaydentheslayerthenightbeg2151 Same here!!! I'm really grateful for the upbringing and the discipline cause it's shaped me into the respectful woman I am today. I owe it to my parents alot!
@@charlotte6717 hmm... idk I would like to say I raise like that and I've never needed to get a spanking or anything... I just knew better from my parents.
What's crazy is we discipline kids over things we as adults would simply call a "mistake". So I broke something by accident. It was an accident! Yes teach about being careful and considerate of property but that's it! Imagine being told off as an adult for smashing a dish?!?
If an adult came into my kitchen and was fooling around and not being respectful of the environment around them and broke a dish...I'd probably tell them off. If an adult came into my kitchen and was being respectful and accidentally broke a dish I would be totally fine with that.
@@jessicag4422 punishing your kid for accidentally breaking something isn't going to ensure they don't accidentally break something as an adult. thats a false equivalent there.
My mom never hit me. From the age I can remember I was taught boundaries, for example: do not cross this line in the kitchen because you could hurt yourself at 3, leading to: do not go to that basketball game without my permission and knowledge because you do not know what can truly happen if you are no prayed up and prepared at 17. Me and my mom have the best relationship, she spoke to me, she treated me with respect by disciplining me with wisdom instead of hurting me with words, hands, etc. I am proud to say that I was raised well and I enjoyed being raised this way. Because she was always conversing with me, teaching me, and caring about my feelings I never ended up in trouble, when others went to those parties, or games, or lied to their parents, I was at home, church, or on a day trip with friends/family because she helped me acknowledge my self worth with discipline. I am 20 now and my friends/cousins still say they wish they had my mom as their mom because she is truly just that amazing! Love you momma. ♡ God bless you all, Jesus loves you. Be safe out there.
This kinda sounds like my mom lol. I’ve been whooped like twice only because they were major offenses. But my mom understands that whoopings (unless it’s genuinely something that bad) don’t do anything and they don’t make either of the people feel good. However, she taught me boundaries so I won’t do anything to get me far enough to get a whooping. I know not to do drugs, sneak out my house, etc. All of that to say she taught me to not even put myself in that position to begin with because world consequences are worse than any consequence she could give me and it didn’t take getting whooped. ( I still know that I can get it if I get out of line though)
What’s the point of discipline your child if they have already recognized the behaviour, apologized, and taken steps to try and correct it in a productive way like making the money to pay for the damage, on top of the guilt they obviously feel? All discipline will do is push them away from the exact way they should be handling their mistakes. ADULTS MAKE HUGE BIG MISTAKES TOO, and they’re going about handling it in such an adult way.
Kat Moscone they need to know that there are consequences even if they are sorry or willing to make amends. So you’re teaching them to think before acting, then think again. They’ll definitely want to learn that with punishment from a loving parent than punishment from the world.
HelenaJ but they realize there are consequences already, the consequences are guilt and shame, having to fix the mess yourself, having to pay for said mess, possibly losing a bit of trust from a parent, those are REAL concequences. All ‘discipline’ teaches kids is that a direct result of bad mistakes or bad choices is just punishment, it also teaches them that they can leverage mistakes with punishment. Sneaking out of the house is worth a week of grounding if the party I go to is amazing. But it’s not worth the disappointment on my parents face, it’s not worth having the cops called on the party and getting arrested for underage drinking, it’s not worth possibly getting in the car with a drunk driver or being stuck in the middle of no where, it’s not worth losing my parents trust, etc. Consequences are the result of an action, not a punishment.
leal I totally agree. And it doesn’t teach kids anything about the real world, or taking responsibility, or emotional regulation. My parents did a good mix of punishment and actual raising me. They snapped me out of bad habits and bad behaviour when they knew I was choosing to do the wrong thing, and they greeted me with love and understanding and helped me work THROUGH my bigger mistakes and mishaps. Because of that I feel GOOD about taking responsibility when I do something wrong and I know how to go about apologizing in a productive way and actually fixing my mistakes instead of just accepting a punishment and cursing the world.
@@KATVALENTINE guily and shame are not consequences they're emotions. Thats like saying depression is a consequence for trauma. So if a murdered feels sorry they should be let off??? Hell nah think again
I think a lot of people assign disciplining with spanking... and there’s so many ways to discipline your child without having them being “ afraid ‘ of you... you want your child to grow up respecting you , not to be afraid of you... because if you don’t try different methods or disciplining your child... they won’t make you their safe space because they feel like you won’t understand them or actively listen while you want to be heard...different methods also work for different children as well !
Well I got spankings as a kid and my parents then told me why they did it and I never feared them because looking back at some of the stuff I did as kid it was deserved probably because I was also stubborn as hell
My parents are different. Material things don't matter but you can not break the basic essentials: food, shelter, water, and hygiene/clothes. If I didn't eat it, it's leftover. If I tore the house to the point of something leaking, I would have to fix it. If I didn't clean up and mold was growing, I'd be scrubbing every each of the place to a shine you can see from the sky. Breaking vases was no big deal. Having said that, I loved my reputation of being the non-clumsy kid in my big family so I cried and fixed everything I ever broke. I couldn't stand the guilt or remorse. My conscious wouldn't let me live.
My husband would've given them (they would need to give him the money back) some spackle and some sheetrock and paint and told them to get to work. My twin sons did that when they were younger.
They definitely did right in taking responsibility. But they would for sure be grounded and/or helping me fix that wall. Your little money will be used for some plaster and a spatula. Get to work lol
@@shivairas6717 Yep! Why wouldn't I? Accidents are one thing but apparently they were fighting anyway when they made the hole. Absolutely they'd be grounded for that.
? All children need discipline. There are many aspects to discipline - guidance, instruction, training, reproof, correction, and even punishment. I think when people hear the word discipline they only think of punishment..
That’s an oxymoron. When you’re raising kids, you instill discipline in them if you’re doing your job. Through loving words, through chores, through conversations discipline is instilled.
My momma whooped my ass so much when I was younger even over little things that it took a toll on our relationship. Now as a mom myself, I try my best to be as patient as possible. I only bring out the whoopin when they get disrespectful or when they break something really important.
My brother did the same thing when we were arguing. After he did it, we were both shook and the argument stopped. He immediately called my mom ugly crying. He didn’t get whooping for it but he did get yelled at. Like this parent my parents felt his guilt was enough
There's no need to discipline them, it was an accident and clearly the kids have learned their lesson and already felt bad about it, so what's the point of punishing them now?
@Neta S she not promoting she pointing out different mindsets in cultures. For me my parents wouldn't hit me but definitely would have gave me a verbal lashing. To them this all they know they are a product of their environment, now with my youngest sister they learn other methods.
I personally don’t agree with beating, hitting your child; 1. You don’t want your children afraid of you, you want them to respect you. 2. You are not teaching a child why what they did is wrong, you are teaching them it makes you angry 3. You are beating your child because they frustrated you not because you are trying to teach them a lesson
She sounds like a good parent. The fact that they were sincerely sorry and tried to pay for it speaks to how well she has raised her children. Make sure they fix it and that's that on that.
There are consequences even if you’re paying. At those ages I would just tell them “yes I’m accepting your money, and your grounded.” But if they were younger they’d probably just be in trouble for the day and we would talk to them about playing/fighting etc. older they’d have worse consequences.
Those are good kids! I would have said we're using this money for the repairs and I need your help to fix it. Also letting the children know that they have to be mindful of what they're doing even while having fun.
I agree with Tam. Jeannie's story was fun but I don't think I'd do that with my children. I'd rather teach them Mercy and redemption. I'd have them help me fix what they broke. And I'd talk to them and let them know if that happened again, the would be consequences.
We make our girls learn how to fix it & they at 16&14 they can learn how to fix accidents! They tried me last summer & had to help their daddy & learn! Nothing wrong with you break you fix!🧡🌺🙏🏽🦋🧡
My mom didn’t play when it came to discipline. She would take away whatever she knew you loved most. For me it was going outside to play with my friends from my neighbourhood. She would ground me from going outside as a punishment😂
Jeannies mom is abusive the kids were being honest they said they would help fix it and they gave their mom money and wrote an apology letter. Seems like they are already disciplined to me
i think taking the money is punishment enough. it teaches responsibility for your actions rather than having a punishment like "no phone for a week" which kinda doesnt teach you anything
*as someone who used to get ABUSED as a child (and as a teenager), i really appreciate these parents for their communication skills. no one is perfect.* *love & light to everyone reading this* 🕊
It’s a difference between abusing your kids & simply giving them an ass whoopin 😂😂 I grew up in an era where if something gets broken in the house, YOU WILL BE GETTING WHOOPED because that means you were playing in the house & if you want to play, GO OUTSIDE 🤷🏽♂️😭 I’m 22 with 3 other brothers & 2 sisters (there’s 6 of us all together & we’re close in age) so if you got siblings you’ll never be bored lol 🤣 Sb: yes you can play indoors but there’s indoor activities 😭😭 like board games, eye spy, video games, coming up with dances, playing with toys... but Tag, Hide & Go Seek, Fumbly Rumbly, Manhunt or ANYTHING of that nature is a NO NO 😂😂‼️
I feel like Loni lies about her stories just to get a laugh. Jeannie always gets the audience rolling and she feels like she needs to say something too
My grandmother taught me the things to not say and do. If I said or did them, there was a punishment. It wasn't always a whooping. It could be no tv, going to bed early, no telephone, no electronics, no company, no playing outside, etc. She didn't want me to fear her but she wanted me to know she meant business!
I remember when I was about 11-13 I was running through a church parking lot with a male cousin of mine playing tag after service was out. I ran so fast and hard I ran and knocked off someone’s right side mirror to their car. Mirror was just hanging with wires hanging out. My arm was in so much pain but I blamed him. He went home and got a terrible butt whooping. I look back and feel terrible about that. Maybe I should confess now at age 27 😂
But its true, dry wall is so easy to break. I once smashed a door a bit too hard and the dry wall caved in. She was saying that the kids didn't have too do to much for the walls to break.
I agree with the way Tamera said she'd handle it. They said it was an accident, they apologized, they pitched in their own money. Obviously if it happens again it's a different story, but kids make mistakes. Plus I put a hole in the wall when I was like 11 too and I remember the guilt of that, I'd go easy on them😂🤷🏼♀️
We are strict in my home so it may sound weird, but I allow my kids to "fight" with each other. I allow them to have their RESPECTFUL arguements with each other. No hitting of course. But it gives them a chance to figure out confrontational situations. As far as the wall, I agree with them learning to fix it thought. It's an important skill.
Me and my sister fought physically all the time. We chased each other around the house with sticks, lamps, shoes, etc and we made far too many holes in the walls. When we asked our parents why they never got mad they said that they would rather have us get out all of our angers to each other young and make up rather than it all building up. My sister and I are very close and even when we do fight we buy the other food and talk it out after like half an hour.
yes! Tamera👏👏👏 but depending on their age I would have them learn how to fix it too. Have them go with you to Home depot with a list of materials they will need, because they have done their research (with help if needed), pay for it, go home and spend their weekend fixing it. They will learn actionable have consequences.
They don’t need to be punished if it was an accident. It seems they are truly sorry. I remember breaking a glass when washing dishes and the amount of yelling I got was so unnecessary especially considering we had 3 other ones left
I swear! I’m not even Vietnamese but sure am Asian. Lol yeah I rember growing up and we would legit cry if we break something in the house. I honestly like the asian way. It’s not about abusive, it helps you learn and grow and realize how hard your parents work. After that, never once broke anything in the house
Discipling your children is a preparation for adulthood. It gives them the foresight of when you commit or do something reckless or bad, there will be consequences. However, it is important to let your children know what they did wrong and how they should behave next time. Let them understand instead of focusing on the punishment. In Asian household, it is normal to discipline children even at the point of hitting their butts with flexible sticks. It enforces retention of what wrong was done and that such have punishments. However, there should be a balance of discipline and showing love or recognizing the good things they've done. Punishments for discipline, simple rewards for good behavior. Also make sure the hand that disciplines is a different hand that hugs, nurtures and show affection.
I agree with Amanda. I wouldn’t punish them or get mad but this an opportunity to learn a new skill. An adult could accidentally damage drywall and guess what we would repair it afterwards. Jeannie that was toxic. Just cause your mom did it doesn’t mean it’s right lol.
I think these kids are more disciplined than most kids. The fact they came clean and even suggested paying for it to get fixed. If it my bro and I, we’d say we didn’t know who did it 😂😂😂 until our parents beat the truth out of us. We’d make a whole ass lie cuz we’re so afraid of being hit. I think being able to say the truth, and not being afraid of getting hit is better
1) there is a difference between disciplining and punishing children- discipline= learning. Punishment=fear. 2) if the story Jeannie told was true that sounds like child abuse not discipline.
If this were a mistake, the parent did the right thing and it shows that she has raised great children seeing how they decided to pay. If they did it on purpose, they should be punished.
It depends on the circumstances surround the situation. Not all situations are the same. And it would depend on what the "punishment" is, it should fit the crime.
I would’ve gotten in HUGE trouble. I’m with Jeannie on this one. My parents would’ve kept me accountable. We weren’t allowed to rough house in the home and we knew. I get accidents happen but we never broke a wall 😂 Now, my husband and his siblings growing up? That’s a different story lmaooooooo
I honestly think what the mom did in this was good the kids took there own money to help fix it and I think that’s fair because in the real world if you break something you have to pay with your own money to fix it and this is a lesson that there already learning
I remember I threw a ball and it hit one of the little vases on the top in wall. I turned into spider man and climbed up, took the vase, super glued the little piece that broke off, and put it back facing the other way. No one found out 😂😂😂
No matter what this mom did she would be judged
Moni C The truth
Definitely 100% facts
Moni C agreed
Factssss
Yeah we need to stop mom-shaming and let them raise their kids their own way because every kid is different! As long as the parent is not abusing or harming their kid let them discipline (or not) however they want.
Parents should discipline their children to teach them a lesson - these kids already know they've done something wrong and are willing to even pay up their pocket money to help fix it: lesson learnt plus extra credit! Any further punishment would be overkill and come from a place of anger and not teaching.
maybe more should be put into maybe teaching them to deal with their emotions as well.
Jeanne's Movie Chats 👏
Boom!! Well said.
That is very true
The lesson is only learnt if they actually paid for the vase not by saying they would by mouth cause teachers a lesson of if you break things anywhere like a store or even a friends house pay for it cause they bought it with money as well. You don't get to walk out of the store freely just by saying sorry like the mom in the clip is teaching her children
I need people to realize that discipline does not equal hitting your child. They are obviously good parents, the kids fessed up.and offered to pay. Its better than what I would have done at that age
I agree. I feel like they've been disciplined enough already to fess up and try and pay. They are still kids and mistakes will happen. Parents seem to be doing a great job. They were remorseful.
Whenever I think of disciplining I automatically think of hitting/beating because that’s the only way I was disciplined from age 3 to 17. I got perfect conduct reports throughout my whole childhood. My parents were very physically abusive especially my dad.
Exactly. I'm against corporal punishment, because in my experience, beatings were done out of anger and teaching fear moreso than trying to teach self-regulation and self-discipline. I also learned enough psychology to be successful at tutoring and babysitting without having to deal with behavior issues. The children want to cooperate so they can enjoy learning and playing.
Edit: Also, I remember being little, so I know children are smart and can understand if you just talk to them (of course, use language accessible to them). I communicate well with the toddlers I babysit, bc I put in effort to understand them.
The fessed up to it which shows they are great parents!
🤣🤭👏
I walked on eggshells growing up because my parents would rage over every little mishap, and I developed severe emotional problems that only worsened in adulthood. I couldn't cope with negative emotions and would berate myself whenever things would inevitably go wrong. Be careful when "diciplining" your kids--however you treat them when they make mistakes is how they will react to their own mistakes.
Agreed. I had the same upbringing as you and I have bad emotional problems now as an adult. It's hard for me to cope with stress at 32 years old. I have anxiety and depression disorders
@@Tan87ful Lisa A Romano on TH-cam really helped me--she taught me that what happened in childhood wasn't my fault, and there wasn't actually ever anything wrong with me. Developing compassion for yourself is essential. I'm sorry that happened to you. Recovery is possible. Best of luck.
Omg same!!
@@Askalott oh ok. Thank you. Those are kind words that I needed to hear
Sara Russo I completely agree my parents (especially my dad) was extremely physically abusive as a form of “disciplining” me. If I didn’t run across the house fast enough in three seconds when he counted I would get beaten. If I did not re-use a towel 4 times before washing it I would get beaten. People don’t realize that how you raise a child permanently affects them- for better or for worse- for the rest of their life.
100% agree with Tamera. They acknowledged their error and communicated it. It’s different if they tried to hide it and be sneaky (like I was when I was a kid,lol) . And another thing, discipline doesn’t mean “physical” punishment.
AMEN!! Unfortunately physical punishment is seen as the norm in a lot of black households. My mom was always quick to whoop when I was a kid. As a result I have issues that I’m dealing with as an adult such as second guessing myself and always feeling like I’m not good enough. When I have children, I’m gonna break the cycle.
@@cartrice2010 exactly, which is why I avoid them as much as possible.
Awe i thought that was cute how they chipped in their own money 😂😭 but honestly they’re just kids and realized what they ddI wrong and apologized and offered to help pay to fix it and as far as consequences go i agree with Amanda they should repair the wall themselves. You’re supposed to teach kids right from wrong & then have them right their wrong. Hitting them solves nothing
what to do if the kids don't listen to you and do it again? Do you keep teaching them the same thing over and over again?
@@lyricgirl2012 Obviously not? Lmao
@@lyricgirl2012 If your kid has shown you that they're sorry and they try to resolve the issue, what more do you want from them? If they haven't you need to find a new way to discipline them. Whether that's taking something away, a lecture, a punishment, whatever it is.
I don't think they were talking specifically hitting. Discipline could be many ways. And I also think it depends on what they did. You can't just apologize for the wrong things you do and think the consequences are now wiped away. As for this one incident, I would just let them fix the wall.
Actually hitting let's them know their actions are wrong by causing physical pain when they do stupid things of this sort. Experiments have proven that this works. Obviously going overboard is a nono but a lil spanking goes a long way when it's needed.
😂😂 Gotta love Jeannie--- Asian Culture is very similar to African culture! Try that in an African home, and you will find a way to rewind to yesterday! Our parents don't play 😂👏🏾
So similar. Im a grown woman now and lm so grateful for that upbringing
@@jaydentheslayerthenightbeg2151 Same here!!! I'm really grateful for the upbringing and the discipline cause it's shaped me into the respectful woman I am today. I owe it to my parents alot!
Lmao Tamera definitely comes across as a push over type of parent
@@charlotte6717 hmm... idk I would like to say I raise like that and I've never needed to get a spanking or anything... I just knew better from my parents.
@zambiangal1 im starting to see that vietnamnese discipline is equal to my strict zambian discipline🤣🤣🤣🤣🇿🇲🇿🇲🇿🇲🇿🇲❤🙏🏾
What's crazy is we discipline kids over things we as adults would simply call a "mistake". So I broke something by accident. It was an accident! Yes teach about being careful and considerate of property but that's it! Imagine being told off as an adult for smashing a dish?!?
If an adult came into my kitchen and was fooling around and not being respectful of the environment around them and broke a dish...I'd probably tell them off. If an adult came into my kitchen and was being respectful and accidentally broke a dish I would be totally fine with that.
Beck Cetera 💯facts there’s a difference
it wasnt an accident tho, she punched a wall
Sarah D2 that’s why you discipline them as kids do they don’t do the same mistakes we do.
@@jessicag4422 punishing your kid for accidentally breaking something isn't going to ensure they don't accidentally break something as an adult. thats a false equivalent there.
“You break, you buy! You break, you cry!” I love Jeannie’s response and that accent is everything!!!
LMAO Mama Mai, you break you buy, you break you cry. Poor Jeannie.
😂😂😂😂
I was searching for this comment 🤣🤣🤣
"Y'all got hella vases in your house" LOOOLL Amanda!!!
I thought I was the only one who heard that lmao...had me dying😂😂
“How you gone walk pass the wall and not know its busted” 😂😂😂
LOL I felt that one too!!!
That part had me screaming in laughter
toyshop 😂😂😂I’m glad she don’t want kids
It was an accident
They were obviously remorseful and willing to fix the issue.
My mom never hit me.
From the age I can remember I was taught boundaries, for example: do not cross this line in the kitchen because you could hurt yourself at 3, leading to: do not go to that basketball game without my permission and knowledge because you do not know what can truly happen if you are no prayed up and prepared at 17. Me and my mom have the best relationship, she spoke to me, she treated me with respect by disciplining me with wisdom instead of hurting me with words, hands, etc. I am proud to say that I was raised well and I enjoyed being raised this way. Because she was always conversing with me, teaching me, and caring about my feelings I never ended up in trouble, when others went to those parties, or games, or lied to their parents, I was at home, church, or on a day trip with friends/family because she helped me acknowledge my self worth with discipline. I am 20 now and my friends/cousins still say they wish they had my mom as their mom because she is truly just that amazing! Love you momma. ♡
God bless you all, Jesus loves you. Be safe out there.
Tiara Words from God Your childhood and mom both sound lovely❤️
@@laurenj432 Thank you, she is truly the best! I was blessed with a beautiful mama and a beautiful family! God bless you, Jesus loves you Queen! ♡
This kinda sounds like my mom lol. I’ve been whooped like twice only because they were major offenses. But my mom understands that whoopings (unless it’s genuinely something that bad) don’t do anything and they don’t make either of the people feel good. However, she taught me boundaries so I won’t do anything to get me far enough to get a whooping. I know not to do drugs, sneak out my house, etc. All of that to say she taught me to not even put myself in that position to begin with because world consequences are worse than any consequence she could give me and it didn’t take getting whooped. ( I still know that I can get it if I get out of line though)
What’s the point of discipline your child if they have already recognized the behaviour, apologized, and taken steps to try and correct it in a productive way like making the money to pay for the damage, on top of the guilt they obviously feel? All discipline will do is push them away from the exact way they should be handling their mistakes. ADULTS MAKE HUGE BIG MISTAKES TOO, and they’re going about handling it in such an adult way.
Many parents use discipline as an excuse to take their anger out, rather than actually correcting behaviour.
Kat Moscone they need to know that there are consequences even if they are sorry or willing to make amends. So you’re teaching them to think before acting, then think again. They’ll definitely want to learn that with punishment from a loving parent than punishment from the world.
HelenaJ but they realize there are consequences already, the consequences are guilt and shame, having to fix the mess yourself, having to pay for said mess, possibly losing a bit of trust from a parent, those are REAL concequences. All ‘discipline’ teaches kids is that a direct result of bad mistakes or bad choices is just punishment, it also teaches them that they can leverage mistakes with punishment. Sneaking out of the house is worth a week of grounding if the party I go to is amazing. But it’s not worth the disappointment on my parents face, it’s not worth having the cops called on the party and getting arrested for underage drinking, it’s not worth possibly getting in the car with a drunk driver or being stuck in the middle of no where, it’s not worth losing my parents trust, etc. Consequences are the result of an action, not a punishment.
leal I totally agree. And it doesn’t teach kids anything about the real world, or taking responsibility, or emotional regulation. My parents did a good mix of punishment and actual raising me. They snapped me out of bad habits and bad behaviour when they knew I was choosing to do the wrong thing, and they greeted me with love and understanding and helped me work THROUGH my bigger mistakes and mishaps. Because of that I feel GOOD about taking responsibility when I do something wrong and I know how to go about apologizing in a productive way and actually fixing my mistakes instead of just accepting a punishment and cursing the world.
@@KATVALENTINE guily and shame are not consequences they're emotions. Thats like saying depression is a consequence for trauma. So if a murdered feels sorry they should be let off??? Hell nah think again
Kids at 8,9,and 11 know what they are doing too Tamera. I’m sick of people saying kids don’t know stuff bc they definitely do.
"Y'all got hella vases in your house!" 😂😂😂
"Y'all got hella vases in your house."😂😂😂 Amanda
Amanda : y'all got hella vases in your house..
She know loni be making up stories 😂😂😂
Why Loni gotta make up stuff??🤦♀️
Haha cuz she didn’t get the last word
I think a lot of people assign disciplining with spanking... and there’s so many ways to discipline your child without having them being “ afraid ‘ of you... you want your child to grow up respecting you , not to be afraid of you... because if you don’t try different methods or disciplining your child... they won’t make you their safe space because they feel like you won’t understand them or actively listen while you want to be heard...different methods also work for different children as well !
All that, conduct disorders, psychological issues and a ruined self-esteem too.
Well I got spankings as a kid and my parents then told me why they did it and I never feared them because looking back at some of the stuff I did as kid it was deserved probably because I was also stubborn as hell
Yes! I came to say this. Glad I saw you well worded comment, saved me having to type so much. 👏🏽👏🏽
Agree with everything you wrote.
@Shandaece Alexander Amen!! Preach!
I loooove Amanda's response and Jeanies response! Definitely good Parenting
These types of conversations never happen in Africa
Yep
Yep.... just get your mind and body prepared for the whooping
My parents are different. Material things don't matter but you can not break the basic essentials: food, shelter, water, and hygiene/clothes.
If I didn't eat it, it's leftover. If I tore the house to the point of something leaking, I would have to fix it. If I didn't clean up and mold was growing, I'd be scrubbing every each of the place to a shine you can see from the sky.
Breaking vases was no big deal. Having said that, I loved my reputation of being the non-clumsy kid in my big family so I cried and fixed everything I ever broke. I couldn't stand the guilt or remorse. My conscious wouldn't let me live.
Probably because I'm African, I don't know what this looks like. We didn't have that privilege lol. I was in constant fear growing up😂
Connie even until now that I am adult, I am afraid to make my mom or grandmother upset 😂😂😂.
I'm with you there sister. I was beaten and it didn't scar me, instead it made me become stronger.
Ok my momma would’ve whooped my ass today tomorrow and 2 weeks from now
Well hopefully you can see what impact they have had on you and not use that type of punishment on your children
@@TheHairiestPotter it hasn't had any negative impact on me.
My husband would've given them (they would need to give him the money back) some spackle and some sheetrock and paint and told them to get to work. My twin sons did that when they were younger.
They definitely did right in taking responsibility. But they would for sure be grounded and/or helping me fix that wall. Your little money will be used for some plaster and a spatula. Get to work lol
Briana Oliver grounded for an accident? Harsh
You will ground your kids over this??
@@shivairas6717 Yep! Why wouldn't I? Accidents are one thing but apparently they were fighting anyway when they made the hole. Absolutely they'd be grounded for that.
@@user-nq6um4bs5y Nah. Not harsh at all to provide consequences to actions that were avoidable.
Briana Oliver well that’s you then. I like the way that mom handled this
Lol "you break you buy", Dont Be a Menace in South Central. You know Jeannie watched that many times.
Dear Jennie Mai I need you to
write a book. I love your stories 😁
I truly believe parents who are disciplined don't need to discipline their child. They'll learn it from your being.
? All children need discipline. There are many aspects to discipline - guidance, instruction, training, reproof, correction, and even punishment. I think when people hear the word discipline they only think of punishment..
@@ivorenesmith9003 I agree that all people should practice being disciplined.
😂 😂
That’s an oxymoron. When you’re raising kids, you instill discipline in them if you’re doing your job. Through loving words, through chores, through conversations discipline is instilled.
Jeannie and her stories😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 Mama Mai is a living legend
“Y’all got hella vases in your house.” LOL 😂😂💀
I love how those 3 black women were nodding in agreement 😂😂
My momma whooped my ass so much when I was younger even over little things that it took a toll on our relationship. Now as a mom myself, I try my best to be as patient as possible. I only bring out the whoopin when they get disrespectful or when they break something really important.
2:49 "You break, you cry" 😂 😂
All parents should make sure they’re in a good headspace and can handle their emotions before having kids.
The best part of this video? Amanda: Y’all got hella vases in your house 😂😂😂 👌🏽
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣Come now, Jeannie makes the show so much more fun and entertaining!😂😂😂 I would stop watching if she left for whatever reason...🤷🏻♀️
The people who felt it wasn't enough expected there to be a beating or something. A sincere apology and their savings is enough for children.
Loni: I like that they told her
Jeannie: How you gone walk past the wall and not know it’s Busted
Me:😂😂😂😂
Lol I was looking for this comment had me rollin 🤣🤣🤣
Hahaha I died Jeannie is SO funny 😂
Lmao Amanda “y’all got hella vases” 🤣
My brother did the same thing when we were arguing. After he did it, we were both shook and the argument stopped. He immediately called my mom ugly crying. He didn’t get whooping for it but he did get yelled at. Like this parent my parents felt his guilt was enough
There's no need to discipline them, it was an accident and clearly the kids have learned their lesson and already felt bad about it, so what's the point of punishing them now?
@Neta S she not promoting she pointing out different mindsets in cultures. For me my parents wouldn't hit me but definitely would have gave me a verbal lashing. To them this all they know they are a product of their environment, now with my youngest sister they learn other methods.
I personally don’t agree with beating, hitting your child;
1. You don’t want your children afraid of you, you want them to respect you.
2. You are not teaching a child why what they did is wrong, you are teaching them it makes you angry
3. You are beating your child because they frustrated you not because you are trying to teach them a lesson
YOU DUMB SNOW FLAKE PEASANT.
La_Trolette Wow 😳 You sound so moronic.
cut the cameras No one said anything about hitting. There are many other ways to discipline.
Paris Antoinette Discipline for an accident ?? Discipline yourself for having weak walls
La_Trolette You abu$ive child abu$er
She sounds like a good parent. The fact that they were sincerely sorry and tried to pay for it speaks to how well she has raised her children. Make sure they fix it and that's that on that.
There are consequences even if you’re paying. At those ages I would just tell them “yes I’m accepting your money, and your grounded.” But if they were younger they’d probably just be in trouble for the day and we would talk to them about playing/fighting etc. older they’d have worse consequences.
*I respect the children for owning up to what they did.*
"You break, you cry" African parent's rule too Jeannie...
Those are good kids! I would have said we're using this money for the repairs and I need your help to fix it. Also letting the children know that they have to be mindful of what they're doing even while having fun.
Jeannie...was not playing 😂🤣😂
I agree with Tam. Jeannie's story was fun but I don't think I'd do that with my children. I'd rather teach them Mercy and redemption. I'd have them help me fix what they broke. And I'd talk to them and let them know if that happened again, the would be consequences.
We make our girls learn how to fix it & they at 16&14 they can learn how to fix accidents! They tried me last summer & had to help their daddy & learn! Nothing wrong with you break you fix!🧡🌺🙏🏽🦋🧡
Always looking at Adrienne
She's so beautiful
My mom didn’t play when it came to discipline. She would take away whatever she knew you loved most. For me it was going outside to play with my friends from my neighbourhood. She would ground me from going outside as a punishment😂
Jeannies mom is abusive the kids were being honest they said they would help fix it and they gave their mom money and wrote an apology letter. Seems like they are already disciplined to me
@Shay91 You aren't any better.
@Ah she's still had enough time to change.
i think taking the money is punishment enough. it teaches responsibility for your actions rather than having a punishment like "no phone for a week" which kinda doesnt teach you anything
You don’t have to beat them in order for them to understand that they did something wrong
Dang, that's the first time that I didn't crack up at one of Jeannie's stories. It made me feel bad.
I would have got a whooping. I didn’t make
money like that growing up to even chip in.
Amanda is actually growing on me
Mama Mia raised Jeannie well.😂I love their stories
*as someone who used to get ABUSED as a child (and as a teenager), i really appreciate these parents for their communication skills. no one is perfect.*
*love & light to everyone reading this* 🕊
Right back at you Love!
Awaken Light Worker *thank you!*
It’s a difference between abusing your kids & simply giving them an ass whoopin 😂😂 I grew up in an era where if something gets broken in the house, YOU WILL BE GETTING WHOOPED because that means you were playing in the house & if you want to play, GO OUTSIDE 🤷🏽♂️😭 I’m 22 with 3 other brothers & 2 sisters (there’s 6 of us all together & we’re close in age) so if you got siblings you’ll never be bored lol 🤣
Sb: yes you can play indoors but there’s indoor activities 😭😭 like board games, eye spy, video games, coming up with dances, playing with toys... but Tag, Hide & Go Seek, Fumbly Rumbly, Manhunt or ANYTHING of that nature is a NO NO 😂😂‼️
1:55 Jeannie is like NAHHHHHHHHH BEAT THEY ASS 😭😭🤣🤣😂
ya’ll gotta hella vases in ya’ll house” ☺️😭😂😭😂
Yall got hella vases in the house
I feel like Loni lies about her stories just to get a laugh. Jeannie always gets the audience rolling and she feels like she needs to say something too
My grandmother taught me the things to not say and do. If I said or did them, there was a punishment. It wasn't always a whooping. It could be no tv, going to bed early, no telephone, no electronics, no company, no playing outside, etc. She didn't want me to fear her but she wanted me to know she meant business!
I remember when I was about 11-13 I was running through a church parking lot with a male cousin of mine playing tag after service was out. I ran so fast and hard I ran and knocked off someone’s right side mirror to their car. Mirror was just hanging with wires hanging out. My arm was in so much pain but I blamed him. He went home and got a terrible butt whooping. I look back and feel terrible about that. Maybe I should confess now at age 27 😂
shamonica stanfield lol F that niinja
I’m Loni. Like, “I don’t know who did that. I never even seen that vase in my life.” 🤷🏽♀️😂
adrienne so cute. "my baaad!" jeannie look like she gonna float away in that sweater lmao
Loni always acts like she knows everything... who cares if its dry wall tf? its more about the action, she just always wants something to say
Denny I agree, she always says the dumbest things.
But its true, dry wall is so easy to break. I once smashed a door a bit too hard and the dry wall caved in. She was saying that the kids didn't have too do to much for the walls to break.
Somebody getting a whooping... In another note, Jeannie lemme borrow that sweater boo
Okay!!
You’re going to hit your child for a mistake they made?
Imagine beating your child for a mistake lmao and y'all wonder why teenagers are crazy and wild n don't like their parents
@@emilyslaton2100 yes and then they could pay me the money for it too.
I agree with the way Tamera said she'd handle it. They said it was an accident, they apologized, they pitched in their own money. Obviously if it happens again it's a different story, but kids make mistakes. Plus I put a hole in the wall when I was like 11 too and I remember the guilt of that, I'd go easy on them😂🤷🏼♀️
Adrienne looks like a lawyer in this Clip lol
We are strict in my home so it may sound weird, but I allow my kids to "fight" with each other. I allow them to have their RESPECTFUL arguements with each other. No hitting of course. But it gives them a chance to figure out confrontational situations. As far as the wall, I agree with them learning to fix it thought. It's an important skill.
If I break anything, I just rotated and wait for the next person to move it and then act like they broke it 😂
Me and my sister fought physically all the time. We chased each other around the house with sticks, lamps, shoes, etc and we made far too many holes in the walls. When we asked our parents why they never got mad they said that they would rather have us get out all of our angers to each other young and make up rather than it all building up. My sister and I are very close and even when we do fight we buy the other food and talk it out after like half an hour.
Sorry to say but Tameras kids are going to Run Tamera 😂😂😂
I need to here the full story cause kids be bad for no reason sometimes, I agree with Jeanie and Amanda they need to learn to fix the wall
yes! Tamera👏👏👏 but depending on their age I would have them learn how to fix it too. Have them go with you to Home depot with a list of materials they will need, because they have done their research (with help if needed), pay for it, go home and spend their weekend fixing it. They will learn actionable have consequences.
Jeannies story are hilarious 😂
They don’t need to be punished if it was an accident. It seems they are truly sorry. I remember breaking a glass when washing dishes and the amount of yelling I got was so unnecessary especially considering we had 3 other ones left
Love you, Jeannie!
I swear! I’m not even Vietnamese but sure am Asian. Lol yeah I rember growing up and we would legit cry if we break something in the house. I honestly like the asian way. It’s not about abusive, it helps you learn and grow and realize how hard your parents work. After that, never once broke anything in the house
Omg Mamma Mai! She’s crazy... love her
Parents need to discipline their child. ...plus all the baby stuff the ladies are recommending
Discipling your children is a preparation for adulthood. It gives them the foresight of when you commit or do something reckless or bad, there will be consequences. However, it is important to let your children know what they did wrong and how they should behave next time. Let them understand instead of focusing on the punishment.
In Asian household, it is normal to discipline children even at the point of hitting their butts with flexible sticks. It enforces retention of what wrong was done and that such have punishments. However, there should be a balance of discipline and showing love or recognizing the good things they've done. Punishments for discipline, simple rewards for good behavior. Also make sure the hand that disciplines is a different hand that hugs, nurtures and show affection.
I agree with Amanda. I wouldn’t punish them or get mad but this an opportunity to learn a new skill. An adult could accidentally damage drywall and guess what we would repair it afterwards. Jeannie that was toxic. Just cause your mom did it doesn’t mean it’s right lol.
I think these kids are more disciplined than most kids. The fact they came clean and even suggested paying for it to get fixed. If it my bro and I, we’d say we didn’t know who did it 😂😂😂 until our parents beat the truth out of us. We’d make a whole ass lie cuz we’re so afraid of being hit. I think being able to say the truth, and not being afraid of getting hit is better
Lol everyone wants to disapline other parents kids but their own!!
Loni killed me🤣
Mama Mai is genius!!
1) there is a difference between disciplining and punishing children- discipline= learning. Punishment=fear.
2) if the story Jeannie told was true that sounds like child abuse not discipline.
If this were a mistake, the parent did the right thing and it shows that she has raised great children seeing how they decided to pay. If they did it on purpose, they should be punished.
It depends on the circumstances surround the situation. Not all situations are the same. And it would depend on what the "punishment" is, it should fit the crime.
Mama Mai be so extra 🤣
Loving this look on Adrienne!
I would’ve gotten in HUGE trouble. I’m with Jeannie on this one. My parents would’ve kept me accountable. We weren’t allowed to rough house in the home and we knew. I get accidents happen but we never broke a wall 😂 Now, my husband and his siblings growing up? That’s a different story lmaooooooo
I honestly think what the mom did in this was good the kids took there own money to help fix it and I think that’s fair because in the real world if you break something you have to pay with your own money to fix it and this is a lesson that there already learning
I remember I threw a ball and it hit one of the little vases on the top in wall. I turned into spider man and climbed up, took the vase, super glued the little piece that broke off, and put it back facing the other way. No one found out 😂😂😂