Dad walks up to a hardware clerk and says "I need some 2x4s" the clerk asks " how long do you want them" dad says "for a long time I'm building a house"
Elephant jokes were my favorite when I was a kid. "How does the elephant hunt for rabbits?" "Hides in the grass and makes carrot noises." "How does the elephant catch sparrows?" "Sits on a ledge pretending to be a bread crumb"
How do the elephants get down from the trees? They sit on a leaf and wait until fall. How can you tell if there's an elephant in the fridge? There are footprints in the pie. Why is it dangerous to go for a walk in the forest in the fall? That's when all the elephants come tumbling down.
The best pirate joke ever: A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender says "Hey, did you know that you have a steering wheel on your crotch?" The pirate replies "Arrgghh. It drives me nuts!"
How many elephants can you fit in a Volkswagen? Four, one in each seat. (...Tell another joke...) How do you know if there is an elephant in your refrigerator? Footprints in the butter. How do you know if there are two elephants in your refrigerator? You hear them talking. How do you know if there are three elephants in your refrigerator? Door won't close. How do you know if there are four elephants in your refrigerator? Empty Volkswagen on the driveway.
Just love this channel, hearing Nicky’s accent, makes me sad how many of us can be found across the oceans! Keep it ip guys and girls, nothing better than a few dad jokes after a work day.
you guys gotta a derivative joke out of Mitch Hedberg's (1968-2005) material, he used to say "I don't like rice because no matter how hungry I am I cannot eat 2000 of something" or depending on the show "Man, I really like rice, it's great when you're hungry want to eat 2000 of something" Mitch was the king of presenting puns and absurd sentences in dead pan style
Hi All, thanks for all of these great jokes. I shared some of these, from this video with people on my Facebook friends list over the weekend, they got some laughs. Thanks again! :-)
Nah, there were times they didn't count her chuckles. Pretty biased counting. She was got a few more times than the counter showed, usually when the teller laughed harder.
Blind man walks into a bar with a service dog and starts swinging it across the bar. The bartender shouts:”what the hell are you doing with a dog?!” The blind man replies:”just looking around” 😂
Great stuff, but I don't think it should count against you if you laugh from a comment from the audience or if you laugh second. Only the first to break should get a point.
It was sweet to see how excited Jana got when she made her dad laugh.
Yes agreed!
Fellow arrives in Australia, and is asked if he has a criminal record.
He says, "Is that still required?"
Classic
Yeah probably.
A foreigner arrives in Australia.
The government tells the 27 000 000 population to adapt to them. : )
@@chuckmaddison2924 Pathetic mate.
@@markdegroot5599 At the company I work for it's very much the case.
Leigh nailed it with delivery of the deja vu joke. He was justifiably really happy with himself too.
Probably too happy haha
Making it the opener was perfect.
The joy Jana has when she makes her dad laugh is priceless
Does Jana use instagram?
Most particularly, I loved NICKY’S inability to hold back laughter with Jana’s “An Irishman walks out of a bar”. 😂 06:54
Please turn this into a regular thing. Had so much fun.
Legend we will!
Dad walks up to a hardware clerk and says "I need some 2x4s" the clerk asks " how long do you want them" dad says "for a long time I'm building a house"
LOL 😂😂😂😂😂😂
🤣🤣
I gotta try that at the lumber yard...oughta be fun...lol
@@richa.s9912 K😅ookbkij😅kbbko😅bi😅kbkokbokok kkilkobk
@@gregjorda3080 b😊kokkkb
Jana's skydiving joke is probably one of my all time favourites over the years, Actually hilarious it came up here.
If you first don't suceed then skydiving isn't for you.😉
And now it down here ‼️😂
Don't rely on Skydiving it will let you down every time!
In the same spirit : You can eat every mushroom... some just once tho.
Why don’t blind people go skydiving?
It scares the crap out of the dog. 🪂 🐶 😱
You can see the same sparkle as Jana in her father’s eyes when he laughs, they’re so funny together 😊
It's Matt's constant little muffled laughs in the mic that do it for me. I don't know how everyone's not constantly cracking up because of that 😂😂
Hahaha you are quite right
I like how Jana seems so unimpressed by some of these. That's one of the funniest parts of this. Lol
The elephant jokes were fantastic, as was the punchline=setup joke Jana told! She is just unbreakable!
So do you know how to put 4 crocodiles in a Mini?
Ask the elephant to get out first
An irish man walks out of a bar. My new favorite lol
Build a man a fire, keep him warm for a couple of hours. Set a man on fire, keep him warm for the rest of his life.
🤣🤣🤣
Elephant jokes were my favorite when I was a kid.
"How does the elephant hunt for rabbits?"
"Hides in the grass and makes carrot noises."
"How does the elephant catch sparrows?"
"Sits on a ledge pretending to be a bread crumb"
How do the elephants get down from the trees? They sit on a leaf and wait until fall.
How can you tell if there's an elephant in the fridge? There are footprints in the pie.
Why is it dangerous to go for a walk in the forest in the fall? That's when all the elephants come tumbling down.
@@jespervalgreen6461 All the classics!
And now we know why autumn is sometimes referred to as "the Fall".
@@jespervalgreen6461 How do you get down from an elephant?
You don't.
You get down from a duck. 🤣🤣
JANA's chuckles > My life
Hahahaha they are quite rare 😂
Ey nicky has a pure south african sense of humor🤣🤣
Oom Nicky is ‘n lag
"Did I already do my deja vu joke?"
"You just asked me that a second ago."
Hahaha love it!
Napoleon was buried very close to his mother. Like a bone-apart.
Haha this is the best
I almost spit out my coffee...
That's a really clever one.
I always think Eloise has the best material; she just makes herself laugh. :)
The levitation of birds joke deserved far greater reaction. Impeccable delivery was key.
That's definitely my kind of humor...kudos to Nicky.
It's a Steven Wright joke, kind of deadpan/surreal humour.
The best pirate joke ever: A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender says "Hey, did you know that you have a steering wheel on your crotch?" The pirate replies "Arrgghh. It drives me nuts!"
Why do pirates insulate their ships? For the ARRR-value.
What's a pirate's favorite letter? You may think it's the "R" but it's really the "C".
Did you hear about the pirate that was a Wheel of Fortune contestant? He lost, kept asking for an ARRR.
I have a stiff neck. I took a viagra and I didn’t swallow quickly enough.
@@jefformsby5604 😂😂😂
Oh God!!! Jana and her Dad...can go on for hours
Love the elephant and mini joke. I have been telling a version of this for decades. 💚💛⛳
In my day, it was a Volkswagen.
@@honzo1078 Same! And involved a refrigerator :)
footprints in the butter…
I dont get it.
How many elephants can you fit in a Volkswagen? Four, one in each seat. (...Tell another joke...) How do you know if there is an elephant in your refrigerator? Footprints in the butter. How do you know if there are two elephants in your refrigerator? You hear them talking. How do you know if there are three elephants in your refrigerator? Door won't close. How do you know if there are four elephants in your refrigerator? Empty Volkswagen on the driveway.
13:35 that "oooh" of understanding was sooo cute :D
My vote so far is for “most people are quite shocked when they find out I’m not a qualified electrician”.
I did not get the joke 😢
@@misbahurrehman4426 the double meaning of “to shock”. Surprise and electrocute. The joke basically makes use of both meanings.
@@georgecaplin9075 my native language is not English, so i did not get many of the jokes 😔
@@misbahurrehman4426 did my explanation help, though?
@@georgecaplin9075 yes, it means many people get electric shock
Jana's "An Irishman walks out of a bar" was great, but Eloise's Grandfather joke was my favorite!!
The 2 jokes abt mini & elephants cracked me up out loud n tears went down my eyes. Golly!
Reverse paranoia is when you can't shake the felling that you're following someone.
With Dad jokes, delivery is key. And these people f*cking nail them :D
I fell in love with Jana sooo badly. She's amazing
The man and the fire make me burst out of laugh. Thanks.
that one's a classical Terry Pratchett
This is what we have been waiting for!!! Did not disappoint!!
Amazing thank you legend!
Just love this channel, hearing Nicky’s accent, makes me sad how many of us can be found across the oceans! Keep it ip guys and girls, nothing better than a few dad jokes after a work day.
Out of curiosity, what accent is that?
Is it me or does the DAD deliver the dad jokes the best
Hahaha he should 😂
I'm in love with Jana. What a funny beauty she is, wow.
The IKEA one got me outta no mans land! 😆😆😆😆😆
Hahah I need to go watch that one again
How do you get a elephant into a Safeway shopping cart...
Take the S out of safe and
The F out of way 😮😂
Laughed my bottom off 🤣🤣. Nicky sounds South African !! I remember the mini jokes. As he told the second part of it and burst out laughing so loud.
Lol, yes! Heard him from a mile away 😂
the rice joke was classic Mitch Hedburg!
Jana is stone cold!! Excellent video!
Bruce lee and Suddenly one was my favourite! I was in fits!
I told my wife she was painting her eyebrows too high.
She looked surprised.
you sure it wasnt a sharpie. 😂😂
🤣🤣🤣
Appreciated the Mitch Hedberg and Steven Wright oneliners.
Too good.. Well thought well written jokes.. And at the end, Jana is beautiful.. I think I am her biggest fan..
Love that feedback thank you legend!
Stand in line Bagga.....
Some of these jokes were borrowed..
Some good stuff in there. Especially the Stewart Francis jokes.
He is a gun!
@@WeGotTheChocolates He definitely is, along with Tim Vine.
Oh, snap...I forgot about Gary Delaney, too. Put some of his in there and you'll just about guarantee victory!
@8:14 Matt suddenly turns into Yoda.
The elephants in the mini was the best joke.
I didnt understand the elephant and mini jokes but then i was introduced to a whole genre of jokes!
Yes elephant is it’s own genre 😂
i think they mean Mini Cooper, a brand of car known for being on the small side
@@CorvusCorone68 yeah that part i got, i didn’t understand that the punchline was just the absurdity of an elephant in a mini cooper lol
@@CorvusCorone68 That is exactly right!
How do you get out of an elephant?...
Run around till you get pooped out
What Google replied when I search Jana?
"Google itself has been searching"😅😅😂
😂😂😂
you guys gotta a derivative joke out of Mitch Hedberg's (1968-2005) material, he used to say
"I don't like rice because no matter how hungry I am I cannot eat 2000 of something"
or depending on the show
"Man, I really like rice, it's great when you're hungry want to eat 2000 of something"
Mitch was the king of presenting puns and absurd sentences in dead pan style
I'm pretty sure "I can levitate birds" was a Mitch Hedberg joke, too.
@@clawsoon yeap
"I can levitate birds with the power of my mind... but only when they're flapping"
And had he lived a little longer we might have gotten a 3rd sentence disclaimer for ostriches 😂
Correction to what I said... the "I can levitate birds... no one cares" joke was Steven Wright.
The Mexican magician joke deserved better, but it was good of Eloise to taco one for the team.
Hahaha agreed 😂
@@WeGotTheChocolates you have dad jokes jalapeño comments section right now.
Loved the rocking chair one! Skin is my favourite 😃
Skin has been dominant in recent times!
Can't tell you how many times i have watched this same video... so good...
Absolute legend!
omg....the testicle glitter one got me
One who gets most points is purest at heart.
Hi All, thanks for all of these great jokes. I shared some of these, from this video with people on my Facebook friends list over the weekend, they got some laughs. Thanks again! :-)
Thanks for sharing!! That's awesome!
I’m about to go to work with tears in my eyes, thanks alot Chocca’s!!! …..
…. No, no… seriously, thank you!
Loved the lazy eye gag
2 minis parked outside took tf out 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
I love these so much. You guys are great
Thank you so much legend!
The elephants in a mini was the best; reminded me of the elephants in a Tree joke
What's the context of it?
Filling the elephants in mini, if you could
@@TheRockyinvincible th-cam.com/users/clipUgkx-lNQTNnu_VmYRr8heFaFvqlV_JteQ5Tk Elephants hiding in trees ...
@@TheRockyinvincible th-cam.com/users/clipUgkxgQ68L7NfF_6VQk6HJCVBdKTVJjqqhZFK E's. in a mini
Grandpa dieing peacefully in his sleep is one of my go to dad jokes. Gets you some odd looks sometimes...
my laughter will be delivered in 3-4 business days
Boom thank you!
The toaster joke was so stupid, I cackled
Still can't figure out why the bread on my Galaxy isn't cooked yet. 😛
Hahaha I love that joke
Funnest extended family ever! That was awesome!
Did you hear about the chameleon who was too afraid to change color in public?
He had a reptile dysfunction
I wish I could laugh like that, the most you'll get from me is a smile and that's when it's a funny joke. I guess I could fake it.
Jana is the GOAT
She's top shelf!
5:55 I swore he was gonna say "Not telling everybody." 😂
I'm here for the joke reactions, unlike the others here apparently
Randomly came to your videos while searching for Dad Jokes. You have the best videos. Thank You for making us laugh 😂.
Love from Pakistan
Amazing legend thank you so much for the support!
Jana is brutal at this! icemaiden!! love the vids!!
Nah, there were times they didn't count her chuckles. Pretty biased counting. She was got a few more times than the counter showed, usually when the teller laughed harder.
What do you call the dog with no legs?
Doesn't matter, it's not gonna come anyway.
The delivery in some of these🤌🤌🤌
at first I was like: why their accent is so strange, then I realized that it's not a US/UK english, love from Kazakhstan!
Jana has such a soothing voice ngl
Please upload pt3 sooner rather than later. You guys and gals are my fave. Thanks xx
And now I understand where Jana gets her sense of humor from haha
The internet.
Those two elephant joke. I think they are the oldest jokes I remember.
I love them.
Am i the only one who expected Skin to end the alphabet/pirate joke with: "Because they get stuck at the Aarrr (R)"? I feel cheated!
I also thought that 😂
The Irishman joke and the granddad's passengers joke are my favorites here.
Jana mastered this game. She's not giving any points
No signs of cracks yet
You gotta get Jana with the "stupid clever" jokes
How do you know an elephant has been in your fridge?
You can see its footprints in your cheesecake.
Hahah now I feel like cheesecake
I bought a dog from a blacksmith once. Soon as I got him home he made a bolt for the door.
Blind man walks into a bar with a service dog and starts swinging it across the bar.
The bartender shouts:”what the hell are you doing with a dog?!”
The blind man replies:”just looking around” 😂
Hilarious, i frequently watch this.
Please continue with these vids!
Great stuff, but I don't think it should count against you if you laugh from a comment from the audience or if you laugh second. Only the first to break should get a point.
Legitimately watching this for the third time in as many days 😂 👍😎💯
Ya know, if someone who's not a father tries to tell dad jokes, that would be a feaux pa.
So much fun!
Why does Matt get away with laughing all the time yet anyone else makes a noise and they score a point?
This need to be an Olympic sport
Definitely hearing some Mitch Hedberg and Stewart Francis one-liners in there LOL
There are sometimes the same jokes in different episodes, but I still have to laugh because of the delivery and you all laughing
Spotted at least two Mitch Hedberg and Stewart Francis classics in there.
Awesome guys.. you are the first channel that I ever subscribed.. Jana is indeed tough.
Did anyone else have to turn on captions for Nicky's jokes? Between his accent, volume, and proximity to the mic, I could barely understand him.
her dads first joke was Mitch Hedberg