Coach Craig Kenneth I LOVE the workbooks! They are keeping me busy and positive during this tough time. Also, it may be a strange ask but any chance you guys would be willing to touch on weathering this crisis when you are also going through losing your partner? I heard that my ex-partner is happily shacked up with his new woman while we all hunker down🤮 and I wonder if this will bring him and his rebound closer together…would love to hear your take on how to deal with all of this while the world has completely turned upside down... thanks! 🙏
@@CoachCraigKenneth question it’s been 10 month since the break up and he still text me every three days saying hey I want to do no contact but I don’t wanna ignore him and I’ve been following his lead this whole time and we haven’t grown any closer granite I slip up and I send long text messages every now and again but I want to do a no contact I want him to realize it and I wanna he’ll do I just ignore him?
Trust the process. Walk away, let things go. If they value you, you’ll hear from them. In the meantime, personal growth and abundance in your life is key. I had an ex come back 6 times, thanks to no contact and growth. It works.
Videos on Top this woman in particular seems to keep coming back in my life. I think it’s truly because I’ve gone into no contact right away, gave it time, let things go and moved on assuming I’d never hear from her again. I’ve always focused on learning relationship skills, developing my own skills, hitting the gym, setting goals and really just becoming a better partner.
Well if she came back 6 times after getting rejected every time then that sounds excellent on your part (though it can be a nuisance, happened to me as well). But if we are talking about getting back together and breaking up repeatedly, it sounds toxic and you better hope she doesn't come back again haha, nobody is worth all that drama and energy.
Onur Böle well I mean she reached out after 7-8 months and a short term relationship....a huge part of me is slashing don’t do it...we’re meeting next Friday....it always ends with us hooking up... then casually dating... we’ll see
As someone with an undergrad degree in Psychology, with a core focus in Social Psychology, I have to say that everything Coaches Craig and Margaret say is dead on. When a breakup occurs and a strong attachment exists the person doing the dumping is experiencing the negative arousal of Cognitive Dissonance. To overcome this they use the phenomenon of Confirmation Bias. Initially they only look to confirm they did the right thing in breaking up ignoring all else. This protects them from facing the negative feeling associated with their decision. But, because negative memories fade faster than positive ones, that they start to remember the good times more than then bad. This leads them to swing the other way, grieving what they have lost. But this is just my 2 cents.
That's some really good insight. During this time I've been really concerned my ex's GOOD memories will fade. Luckily, we had SO many amazing memories. It is encouraging to know the mind will amplify those, not downplay them.
After a 5 month separation of my girlfriend of four years, she contacted me one day about “our cat”. During this time I had really just focused on myself, gotten sober, changed jobs, and worked on my mental health. I learned to be comfortable with being alone. Now we have been together since December of 2022 again. We have a better relationship than we ever have, but I know if things were to not work out I will survive just as I did when we were separated.
Glad it's working out for you. This no contact is amazing. Been 21 years and she's gonna call any day now, I can feel it. Seriously though, years ago there were so many signs and coincidences that were pretty uncanny. Apparently signs are complete BULLS**T.
No contact allows you to slowly feel comfortable by yourself again. Once you know that you can go on without them, you're set for life. If they contact you again, give it a shot, if you want to. If they don't reach out, who cares, you're over that lifestyle and there are plenty more people in this world to find happiness with.
Exactly! This is the true purpose of no contact. To process a loss, grieve and move on. This has nothing to do with the other person coming back or not. You get to decide later if you want them back or not based on if it’s in your best interest. If they don’t come back, more often than not, you don’t even notice because you’ve moved on with your life.
I have MS and most of the time you would never know it he said he broke up with me because of that my flares and symptoms are far and few between iRun I workout I work full-time you would never know I had a condition two times he's made it clear that it gives him anxiety how can it move that he wasn't even there one of the times is this a cop out
I am writing this to the people that are hurting, waiting for their ex, a girl/guy their talking to to reach out during no contact. I want you all to know that some day it will be okay. Even if they don’t contact, they don’t necessarily want to get back together sometimes. But the fact that they reached out to you after God knows how long is a BIG win for you! Celebrate the wins. I pray that your relationship with your person rekindles back. If had some type of connection with this person and you do no contact VERY WELL, I guarantee you, you’ll feel so much better! Not only will it allow your ex to reach out but it will allow to you to grow and become an even stronger person than before. I’m saying this through personal experience and I’ve grown a lot and working things out. God bless you guys
Guys don't listen to people commenting "nope, if they left you they were never yours", they're just telling their stories indirectly. You follow YOUR heart, not theirs
I applied the no contact rule for 7 weeks and did everything according to your videos. I did not beg or plead, I used social media to show him my new and improved self. He went from cutting all contact with me for WEEKS to chasing me (he literally stood outside my house crying begging me to come out). We met and now he's obsessed with me, he can't even ben without me one hour without texting. He even asked me to move in with him again! Thank you for everything. Stay strong everybody!
T J don’t block them. That just shows him or her that you still care and are bothered by the break up. Also, do not ever go to their social media.. it’s just picking an old scab..it won’t heal that way. I realized every time I peeked his profile I would feel like shit so I just stopped. Took a bit of willpower at first but now I’m good. That was also the one thing that really helped me start moving on . Good luck
@@sadep0330 day six for me. The pain is rough. Knowing that this time there is no emotional turmoil, because I can see where it went wrong what we are both at fault for, leaves it "neat and tidy". That is unsettling.
This is so true. It took my ex 3.5 months to reach a point where she wanted to reconcile. You just need to give it enough time. Because if they don’t reconsider their decision you will reach a place where it does not matter as much anymore. Use this time to grow on your own because you will never be as motivated or dedicated to selfwork as you are at this time. Stay strong and love yourself.
@@Gong14921 if that is really how you feel then of course, that is how you should act. I feel, however, that that stance is one of insecurity. (This need not apply to your specific situation, it is just my general opinion.)
@@magnussahlstrom4172 can you please elaborate a bit more? Because I was looking at it from a place of self-respect, but maybe you have another view that I haven't considered.
Yea..I feel you.hurt even more if it's breadcrumbs. I am going through it.hurts to know the person can change so much it's like you don't even know who they are.in my case,I got diagnosed with a heart condition and liver condition within 6 months of this breakup. The heart problems and other issues started right after the breakup and he may seem like he cared and asked me how I am but eventually he doesn't care anymore and couldn't care less even if I drop dead in front of him.I am already going through the breakup then the health problems...he knows it and is still mean,cold savage and harsh and very unapologetic about hurting or upsetting me whether on purpose or not.I am still trying to heal.
Well Craig and Margaret are speaking exactly the truth. I did the dumping once and then after five months I felt a strong regret and was reaching out to that person like crazy. So guys believe it, the dumper is going to give themselves a second thought of what they have done eventually.
Absolutely it’s True that what Craig and Margaret say about most Dumpers do give second chances too decent Ex Partners My LDR Ex is extremely receptive too our chats and has been giving me hints that’s the door is open again 😬
Coach Craig Kenneth you mentioned that if they reach out about anything (breadcrumbs) that is good and we should respond. 1. Does that give the ok to initiate contact next or go back to NC? The guy I was dating for 2 years sent a text about something not important a week ago and his texts aren’t so loving and animated like they have been the last 2 years. I think we’re all wondering if breadcrumbs are just their way of keeping us on a string?
I don't. Dumped his ass for a reason. He didn't give a shit when he had me and never will. Works on ur self esteem. I only feel sad for him cuz he's too old to be a fuckboy and all the empty sex with all the hos on Earth can't begin to compare to the love and loyalty of a real woman. Most importantly he never got to hit this fine ass!! Loser!!!
@Plug Walk that fool already tried to come back twice if it's any of ur business. I still don't miss his lying ass. There is more to miss about a real woman than sex.
That's what I really needed to hear "dumper is gonna regret and go through those same emotions". This session really helped me without any bullshit tactics and not damaging my thoughts of moving on. Understanding the actual power of time.
I'm the dumper and I don't regret it. I went no contact so as to not get sucked back in. I would never go back without a sincere apology and him showing real progress working on his problems
By the time they contact you, chances are, you don't want the relationship as it was when it ended. The first couple weeks is the hardest, but it is the most important part. That starts the ball of doubt rolling every so slightly. Every week it starts gaining momentum.
Going through it now. Got dumped 2 weeks ago and been in no contact since, at first it was extremely hard but each day that passes I'm getting better and less interested in reconnecting.
@LeeEverett1 Way to go! It is hard, but necessary. I used to think about when I broke up with a girl, and she left me alone, was I sure it was the right thing. The ones that kept trying and got a little crazy were ALWAYS no way to try again. Good luck! I found my person 10 months ago, she is worth what I went thru to be available to her.
@@BjManberries Yeah it's tough man it just shocks me that she'd let this fall apart so easily. We had one small dispute, our first dispute in the whole relationship and she basically ran and ghosted me. My thoughts keep telling me that I'm thinking about it more than her and she's just living life not having any doubts. Makes me lose hope that she'll ever reach out anyway, 2 weeks is a long time IMO compared to us talking daily. Glad to hear you found someone
If you walk away & don't look back it shakes them to know they're not worth a backwards glance. When you realize that it's actually true? That's when that person no longer seems at all appealing to you no matter how much you once loved them✌️✌️
Be careful with the "not ignoring them" if they're texting you. They could still be texting you because they want to hold onto you even after you guys aren't together anymore, not because they want to/are ready to get back together. I had a mutual breakup with my bf and he kept texting me everyday like normal, not because he wanted to get back together but because he wanted to feel like he still had me somehow. Let them feel the loss, let them miss you and use this time to heal and move on.
The secret is you have to stay strong & firm. Prayers is the key to endure it, then if he comes back he is yours, if he’s not he never was. I’m telling this to myself 😁 Thanks Coach Margaret & Coach Craig❤️
I’ve been on both sides of this. For anyone who maybe made some mistakes after the breakup here’s a story that might give you hope. I can say no contact absolutely had an effect on me. I broke up with someone I had reconciled with (after being broken up for around two years w zero contact) because they had become controlling and manipulative because of their insecurities and it was overwhelming, I couldn’t even have a nap or hang out with friends because of their need for me to respond to texts, and it drove me back to someone else. The breakup was awful, we had been together officially for about five months but very close for way longer. They begged and pleaded and spammed me for weeks, harmed themselves, I had to reach out to one of their friends at one point because I was concerned for their safety. I tried to stay in their life because I cared but it was an outburst every other day because they were hurting and it caused me a lot of stress and was clearly not helping them heal. After two months of this one day they asked me straight up if I was seeing someone else and I told them the truth, they were very upset and ended up saying they couldn’t talk anymore and had to stop all contact. I agreed and did feel guilty, but was also relieved it was over. I was sad but it didn’t last long as I was excited and happy about being with the other person. Then after around three months it just started to hit me. I forgot the negative feelings and just missed them, I couldn’t see what they were doing on social media at all, I thought about them every day and started feeling just awful. At four months I was crying over it often, even being with someone else. The tables turned completely. Then they texted me one day (right after I had been crying over it lol) looking for closure, but we ended up reconnecting. We didn’t date again, we were close for awhile and were intimate occasionally (both being single at this time) but neither of us had really worked on ourselves so it didn’t last. The friendship fizzled out and they removed me from their socials a few weeks ago with no explanation and I’ve just accepted we outgrew each other. Now I’m on the other end with someone else, going no contact and working on myself while they’re in a rebound hoping they’ll go through what I went through and reach out someday. Almost feels like karma. But I’ve made so much progress with my mental health I’m almost glad the breakup happened, I’ve realized the mistakes I made and I’m working on fixing my unhealthy and toxic tendencies. And I do believe he’ll come back eventually, he always does as soon as I move on. :-) Good luck to everyone going through this, it’ll all work out in the end no matter the outcome!!
Thank you for sharing this! I think my "ex" is in her relief phase right now and im working on myself and hitting the gym. Whatever happens happens but I'm moving forward either way
@@teddyboy9116 yeah, mine is 30 minutes away. I came across her at a lake nearby but that was an hour from both of us. Craziest coincidence in my life. Stay strong, if I could still stay NC after seeing her. You can
Hey , im now on day 1 i tried and i always find myself reaching out. I hate that i have no self control. I saw on Instagram that he followed some girls and we broke up about a week ago. Drive me crazy!!!! He blocked me everywhere!! And his parents doesn’t answer me at all. Idk what i did so wrong that i deserves that. Anyway now im blocked even on email . I really trying not to contact , i dont wanna make hopes that he will come back cause its not likely that he will even unblock me.
You guys are amazing. Married 28 years wife left for another. I did all the wrong things. She didn't come back, I would have done anything for her to come back. Now after many years I am glad she didn't.
I went no contact, man it was hard but, I was good. 5 months later, just when I was just getting over him he showed up at my place at midnight yelling my name outside my window. I let him in because he was a little tipsy and loud. He was shaking like a leaf so, I let him sleep on my couch. We conversed and he said being lonely sucks. It’s a longer story but, we’ve been back together for six months now. He’s an avoidant and is getting better everyday. He still can’t say I love you but, his actions say otherwise. I’m doing my best to be a good partner but, I’m still a little scared but, not like before. My anxiety has gone way down. I am open with him but, not super needy. I try and do the things I’ve learned from Craig and Margaret and am constantly working on bettering myself but, for me. It’s gotta be for yourself not for them. You’ll be stronger, happier and healthier! Thanks Craig and Margaret for making me a better person and partner. You got me through a really long and tough time.
Gao Ang, I did. Unfortunately, he broke up with me again about a month ago. He wouldn’t open up and I was getting frustrated and he knew it and knew he was causing it. Btw I was extremely patient with him. His actions said love but, he has never said it. He told me he loves things about me but, not me. He also said he wanted to experience other people. His idea of experiencing other people is three dates and done. He has a teenage son with addiction problems which affected the relationship also and he avoided dealing with this too. I tried to open his eyes about it but, he didn’t want to hear it. Avoidant to a T. I’m in no contact again and most likely will not hear from him as I told him not to contact me. The sad thing about it is he has taught his son to be like this and he has no idea how much damage this has caused. I love him very much but, I know he has years of trouble ahead with the kid and he may never change or accept love or trust anyone ever. (Ex wife cheated then married a millionaire 6 months later which devastated him) I could go on but, I’m trying to focus on myself and this makes my head spin. I’m meditating and breathing to relax my mind, working out and dating a little. Hopefully, in a few months I’ll forget him and find someone who can love and communicate better because I deserve it.
Brenda Sienkiewich thanks for sharing the story , I told myself don’t give hope but still missing him , his real reason is he is afraid he is going to regret if he marry and now I’m in China he is in Italy then he said distance and border is the biggest problem better break up now than later ( we have seen each other 7 months ), he was such warm guy with me and a guy would do everything for me but he took it back at one day . Nothing to complain but I want back with him , and get over him
They’re right ... but also be prepared, because even if you follow this advice, which is great advice, it doesn’t guarantee anything, sometimes people will move on regardless, so accept that could happen... Have hope but also be realistic and work on yourself...
I got Dumped last on December 2019. I was needy I begged and pleaded so bad but guess what I did No contact for 3 months and she called me today, so far everything is flowing through nicely now and we gonna have dinner together next weekend. We both so happy no contact is the only way to go goodbuddies
Hi Sam Great news for you getting back with your ex hope things are going strong. My situation is the same I was dumped in February for being too needy and I chased her for months I'm now in no contact for last 3 weeks I know she isn't seeing anyone and when I last saw her by mistake when passing each other at a shopping centre she looked tired and a bit more weight .I'm doing all the self improvement gym drum lessons new hairstyle new clothes I lost 14kilos so when she saw me I'm sure she would have noticed the changes
Congratulations on getting back together I hope it's going strong. I'm exactly the same I did so much chasing stalking and now I've stopped ...I hope she returns it's been 7 months
Craig and Margaret and everyone here I just wanted to post that I have a good friend of mine [ who called me with this news]who broke up with the "love of her life" 26 years ago. Recently she put her profile on facebook and guess what the love of her life contacted her and they started seeing each other again. They have been in no contact with each other for almost three decades. So guys you never know.? Believe me Margaret and Craig know what they are talking about so work on yourself and be happy with your self and your life . Remember you had a life before them!!!!! Wonderful, insightful video as usual.... you both are amazing!
I had an ex recently start contacting me again, after 10 years. And I was so crazy back then to him, after we split I went into deep depression and contacted him so much, incessantly and ruined everything. Cried for two years, took about 4 to feel like I could finally let go to feel better, decided to stay single on own completely for 9 yrs.. and as soon as I got to a place within me to date someone new, and started liking this new person.. My ex contacted me. It felt like a universal wakeup call at the time. I didn't want him back because I'd finally let go of the hurt and started liking this new guy I was dating, so I focused on him.... well, after only a few months 😔 I'm back in the same boat but with the guy I now like, ending things and heartbroken. And my other ex, is now calling me frequently. I'm glad I'm only at friends mindset with him now, because that pain was way too deep to ever go there again.... but my point, yes.. Hadn't heard from him for a decade! So it can definitely happen everyone. I'm glad for you friend Holly, that it's a different situation for her. Though from what I've witnessed in my circle of life, that can often be a repeat about to happen of something that was never truly healed.. so I hope her case ends as an exception and not that. Xx
This Thnks giving my ex from 40yeas ago emailed me and we started talking 2 or 3-hour sessions twice a week for ten weeks until I said let's stop this so we tried and now it's really hard to, She's in a part-time relationship and lives 2000 miles away. Anxiety all over again. but every two or three days a text or an email pops up!
A woman leaves mentally before she leaves physically. I do not like to let go of people, I try to keep trying even though they kept being so mean. It took him to really hurt me for me to let go.
ballinlough12345 I’m in the same boat trying to get the mother of my beautiful daughter back , I neglected her and done a lot of silly things , I’ve take my energy away from her and I’m half seeing results but I don’t let anything get to my head... how did you go about it
Hello Craig, just drop by to say thank you for creating this channel, it’s my most recommended TH-camr channel for sure. Thanks to you, Marguerite and Victoria for all the mental supports to thousands of broken hearts out there. For countless sleepless nights, your videos helped ppl to get over the darkest time in their life, giving great motivation and hope in believing oneself again. After a long long period of time, I’ve finally reached the point that I don’t want anyone back and I don’t care if they are living their best or worst life without me. I got myself back. Thank you! God bless you all!
My ex left me just over a month ago, yes I begged and reached out for about 2 weeks, I then went straight in no contact, I haven’t reached out or heard from him, it’s now been 3 weeks, We were only together for 7 months so I really don’t see us getting back together. But I’m getting stronger now and don’t even feel like I want him back now. Thanks to you guys I feel stronger and happier now 🥰🥰🙏
in 2020 I had the worst heartbreak ever. I wanted that girl back so badly, you couldn't imagine. Now she texted me 2 1/2 years later, how she's missing me and wants me back and would like to start all over again. 2 years ago I would've been so happy to read that message. But meanwhile I know that the breakup was a blessing in disguise. She was a toxic person but my love blinded me. I declined politely and wished her all the best. I just wanted to let you guys know, exes come back, even years later. But sometimes you don't even want them back at that point. :)
Wow I felt like I just had an actual session with you two! Thank you!! My husband of 7 yrs lost his job due to covid, left me & our 4 children & says we are over. We have been playing this back and forth game and just when I feel like things are doing better he shuts off his emotions blocks me I don’t hear from him for days. I’m going to stop the begging do the no contact and let him feel what life is truelly going to be like when he can’t come running back when he feels like it. You two are awesome!!! And thank you for sharing your knowledge with all of us❤️
I cried for almost 4 months and cried today as well. Been in no contact for almost 2 months now. I felt every single things that they described. Whenever I felt like I am too overwhelmed with feelings and starting to feel anxious in regard to my ex, I listen to these twos and walk for an hour in my neighbourhood until I feel ok. It’s so painful.
Coach Margaret is like the grandma I never had: warm and nurturing. Mine was more like: domineering and loud. No wonder our family is full of neurotic people.
NC is the hardest thing to do, BUT it get easier AND my ex reached out. He even asked about the cats!!!! (Indirect/direct approach) Thank you coach Craig & coach Margaret!! I continue to learn so much from your content. FOREVER GRATEFUL
Io Europa Ganymed Kallisto No. He pursued heavily and made future plans until he ghosted. 2 weeks later, when he had asked me to come visit him on base, pictures were posted of him with another woman. I blocked him again and have completely closed the door. I deserve so much better
@@karissakarma2997 oh... That was... Totally unexpected. Wow. Some people are really trash. In any case, you haven't lost anything, but you have gained a lot of experience and growth through this struggle which makes you stronger in future relationships. 💪
I am dealing with this now. I have taken him back 7 times now and just went NO contact again today. This NEEDS to end!! You are SO correct on ZERO appetite, diarrhea, exhaustion. I used to be so very happy-go-lucky and positive! I feel like a completely different person now, its awful!
Currently got a girl going cold on me. For the first time ever, I’m gonna just let her go instead of chasing her. Already got it in my head she’s gone so it’s either her putting more effort in or me remaining the fun confident guy she originally fell for. Win win.
@Corina Luana Vlad our situations are very different. Im currently going to school, and work a full time job and was working my ass off to provide a better future. I used so much of my energy to push her, and encourage her to do the things she needed and wanted to do. In the end, after 2.5 years she dumps me by removing our relationship status on facebook, no call, no text nothing. I call her, and she saids she is with someone else. I feel worthless, and suicidal.
@@gwynbleiddroach2589 I feel the same way. We were staying together for 5 years even planned a wedding. I cried begged but she said no! What hurts the most is my mum was there saw me at my weakest and even cried but she said no. Ive even done bodily harm to myself I feel as worthless
I was feeling down and sad. Thank you! I needed to hear this. I feel so much better and will continue with no contact, haven’t heard from him for about 1 month. This message was so helpful and helped me stay strong .. love you guy’s.❤️
hey craig, i just got dumped by someone who i never thought could hurt me. I came across this video at the right time .I am grateful that i came across your video. I do firmly believe if you were honest in a relationships , they are going to realise someday but you can not beg them to see it. TIME, UNIVERSE, FAITH, GOD ,PATIENCE and SELF ESTEEM is something that will open their eyes to look out for you. Thanks
I’m always coming back to the no contact videos because my anxiety causes me to think no contact won’t work on my ex (he’s the one exception) but these videos always help to bring me back to reality.
I’ve watched this video a hundred times on repeat. Gives me some hope. I miss her so much. She said she needs space and her birthday is next week. She is also an FA and I am an AP. Trying to keep my shit together and staying no contact. This sucks but you guys nailed it. Please send me out good vibes…my heart is breaking
When you are trying to let go of something, it really helps so much faster when you don't get anything to do with it anymore every single day. That is also true with letting go of someone. And it surely takes time. Great content, Craig!
20 yrs together and he doesn’t even talk to me anymore. And now he’s “ building with the woman he left me for”.. devastated.. I did nothing wrong . I feel like I was bad or something was wrong with me . This is so hard. He don’t even seem like he’s affected at all. All I can see is them being happy together and bonding. I feel Like I’m grieving and I can’t get out of this self sabotaging and having no zest for life anymore while he seems so happy. This broke my spirit
Margaret at her finest! My favorite video with her. I miss her. She was a wonderful attachment guide and educator. I’m so grateful i had the opportunity to council with her. ❤
Craig, your videos really help me when I feel anxiety about my breakup and honestly just put me at peace and know that everything will be okay regardless of what happens. I can honestly say after finding these videos they have saved me from own thoughts and feelings. It has been a little over a month since the breakup, I am finally going to truthfully begin no reaching out. It is a little difficult because we do go to the same church together. but right now I have hope and I am going to work on myself. I just found out he had thrown out the things (gifts) I have given him.. which hurt and I'm not so sure what that means but if I can have some clarity on that.. that would be great. Hang in there everybody.
@@sofiahussein3751 I’m so sorry. I also pleaded and begged him to talk to me, to take me back but to no avail. It sucks because just like that , they seem to have no feelings at all. Been in no contact since february, i broke nc in april but didn’t get any reply and i felt worst. I hope u feel better soon
Success story here! After two weeks of No Contact, she finally messaged me and within that short period of time, she realized how much worse her life had gotten without me. She was amazed by my newfound emotional intelligence and is falling in love with me all over again. DO THE WORK! TIME WILL WORK IN YOUR FAVOR IF ITS MEANT TO BE. BUT ITS ESSENTIAL THAT YOU DO THE WORK! Coach Craig is right!
Hi coaches, your videos are the most detailed ones on youtube and also these keeps me still sane amid anxiety and loneliness due to breakup. Keep up the good work!
The power of love has the power to render us helpless,even kill us literally!! Songs, stories,books have been written about this emotion, God bless all the broken hearted 🙏💔
He reached out yesterday...after one year and four months of no contact. (I thought this stuff only happened to other people 🤭). "No contact" works, if used as directed. Worst case scenario, if they don't come back, you've regained your dignity and respect.
When they both say “dumpers do regret their decisions”. 🙌. It ain’t gonna be the same without coach Margaret. I’ve never missed someone I never met so much before
In week 6 of NC. Been running, biking, lifting some dumbbells, watchin rocky training montages, and doing a decent job stayin off social media. If what i provided for her was truly something she loved, (which i do believe she did love) then maybe someday, ill hear from her. Stay busy!
@SLM M Staying busy gets you out of the house first off. At some point you have to actually get up and do something. Update wise, I've moved on, been roughly 6 months since the break up and yeah I feel alot better.
@@heathertaylor3256 been doing better, been working 40 to 50 hours a week, gaming with the bros, it definitely gets better when you get out of the house
@@Coleslaw97 I’m only on day 3 and it’s killing me, not been out the house since Sunday when he called it off. Lockdown doesn’t help either, hard times 😞
@Frangipani Yang thanks for your insight, when I get the time I'll look at that. I'm a freestyle fitness instructor and omg it's hard to focus on preparing written workouts when my mind is elsewhere. I know I got stuff personally to work on and I hear talking helps and therapy. Sometimes I feel I've got not much energy to even organise that. I heard on this podcast about breaking up etc and no contact. Frankly I don't even know if it was her or me to initiate not reaching out. I did tell her some other time to me to visit if she'll have me back and she deep down will always be that friend but not right now I need to heal. Next day or next 5 days she never contacted me. So I may have started it and she left me be or she left me be due to a lash out at the heat of the moment and feels guilt..
I couldn't agree more. When the coaches with the real deal speak you just know they know their stuff. This is one of the best videos on these issues I've watched. 👍👍👍
Bro. I’m gonna keep it real. Every time I smile. I see my ex. I invited my ex girlfriend out one day, and the people that know me asked us both if we were related. They told us that we look like brother and sister, but we were dating at the time. And when I used to look at photos of us two side by side. I can actually see what people were talking about. She broke up with me, but for some reason she would call me nonstop after the breakup, she would drive by my house, she would email me, she would call me off different numbers. I don’t know if she still thinks of me, or has she moved on, but I’ve been working on myself, I’ve improved financially, and mentally. Physically fit now. I do miss her touch, and the way she tasted. If she reached out to me now. I would take my time, and answer. But I would talk to her. We were together for 9 month’s.
Success story here!! My ex bf and I are back together. We were broken up for a little over a month. He said he still loves me and everyday he thought of me and everything made him think of me. I was in NC for about 25 days until I reached out about money I needed from him for concert tickets I still had. He sent over the money and we had very sporadic and random chill conversations every other day for about a week. I really felt like he only replied to my texts to be polite because we didn’t really end on bad terms. His replies were casual and seemed apathetic. So finally I asked an open ended question and asked how he was doing. Then we had a whole day of good conversation then that same day he asked me out to get boba. That same night but he said he was scared that I was going to move on and had to tell me he still loves me and missed everything about me. We both agreed to work on ourselves and push each other to be our best and be a strong couple. I said we can take it slowly and I’m open to it. But ultimately I told him I loved him still too! Update: we broke up 3 months later
Nothing. Is the key word to remember. Nothing YOU could have said/done would have saved the relationship. They made the choice for you. My last ex, I went through all of what you said. It caught me off guard. i spent 2 weeks not eating/sleeping/ just broken and empty. Experienced Anxiety Attacks everything triggered me someone who has PTSD for the first time in my life. Right after the breakup I called her up and thought It was a misunderstanding or I blew it. Did not call to beg or plead just clarification cause it had not hit me yet. She was cold/emotionless/monotone. Hearing me breaking as it was hitting me did not move her. The thing is when we met she lost her job and I was her rock. A year later I lost my job, it was not a good fit. She was M.I.A in my corner. One day we were in bed and something felt off. She asks me what am I thinking? I replied "I think you will ditch me since I have no job and its difficult to score an interview" She assured me she would never leave me and here she is a month later leaving me. The advice I got was the following. People that love ya, don't leave ya. When the chips are down, you see who stood with you. She left at my worst and does not deserve me at my best. A cousin suggested to grab everything note/paper memento and put it into an envelope and mail it to her home and the return address from her job. No letter. Let her guess the message. It could say "I am done with you" or "I dont want to remember you" or "I find out something that we will never get back together" and etc. She broke up with me 2 weeks before her birthday. So when I mailed this it arrived the day after her birthday. I just turned out that way. My cousin had tolled me the 2nd week and I did first thing monday. My sister volunteered and dropped off everything my ex gave me to goodwill. Why keep her memory alive and keep the hurt alive in my heart. I wish Coach Craig were to include how some of these exes that deeply hurt us may have been NPD. Narcissistic Personality disorder. After watching channels such as AngieAtkinson and Assc Direct and Narcology Unscripted. You see the patterns that Coach Craig says about exes and are related to NPD. Such as at first your partner love bombed the hell out of you. Second is they devalue you where they pick at you and start fights. Gaslighting comes in and leaves you 2nd guessing everything. 3rd is they discard you at your worsts. 4th They try to hoover (like the vacuum) you back and repeat the cycle. After dealing with Narcs you feel depleted, exhausted mentally and broken. Sound like what Coach is talking about and you never see the breakup. Also a woman rarely leaves you unless she has someone else lined up. My ex kept on hanging out and talking a lot with 1 male guy friend from her circle. Never had the proof but had a strong hunch. Oh well, not my prob. She became his problem. Time passed and I reconnected with extended family. Healed and learned a new craft and career. I deleted and rebuilt my social media but never put anything personal other than related to my new business venture. A week before valentines day she went around all of my blocks and left me a voicemail from a number I did not recognize. She called me from the County Mental Health Services. Her profession is something entirely different. NOW, that she was possibly having her rock bottom moment. Here she is calling me to be her support when she left me at my worst. I blocked her and moved on. I suggest never get back with an ex who left you. They only comeback when its to their benefit not yours. LIke how steel becomes stronger with fire. That was me. She showed me the type of women she is and I thank her for that. I wish her all the best but leave me alone. She chose her friends/party/freedom and let me know in her way my suffering was not important to her. Sweetie, careful what you wish for. For it may come true. If she left me once, what stops her from doing it again? Did she comeback after possibly the other guy ditched her? Did she finally realize I was the prize? It doesn't matter. I moved on, I was forced to grow without her. If she was not there during my struggle she does not deserve me when I hit success.
It is hard and I've broken my own no contact rule before. But that said, at some point you get to the point you realize that why would you want to be with someone that doesn't want to be with you? You have to have some self-respect. I've learned the really hard way that my definition of love (spending time together, talking, laughing, playing...) is not everyone else's definition of love. I've learned that I have a need to HELP whenever I sense a need and that I get taken advantage of. I've come to realize that I am SICK to DEATH of apologizing for being who I am. Smothering? I just care. Your idea of a good time is laying in your bed and spending hours on FB. I'm wrong for wanting attention and affection? I have to ask you if you love me because it is pulling teeth to get you to say it on your own? Thank you Craig and Margaret for stating the truth that we tend to not want to hear. For saying what I've known in my heart always. Hope always sprang eternal within me. I still love this man but it has to cut both ways. He told me he couldn't give me what I need. I guess he knew what he was talking about. I should have believed and listened. Outcome? No hope left in me whatsoever that there is anyone who is right for me. I'm apparently some weirdo. 60 is too old for belief in fairy tales. And sorry for what devolved into my situation. I did not mean to go there but its only been two days. Going through all the stages. Disbelief, sadness, anger, back to sadness...but I'm ok. Truly.
First time seeing these guys! They are so great together! OMG, what a different experience & wisdom brings to the table! It's crazy because when I caught my husband talking to an X fiance, I felt like someone broke up with me but I couldnt understand it. Been married 22 yrs. I did all of the things u guys mentioned even though I'm still in the house with our grown kids. He never apologized sincerely but blamed it on me! It's been 7 years and nothing ever got better but only worse. We have no connection what's so ever. About 6 months ago I brought that up, and he basically agreed in a rude, nasty way and then walked away from me. I'm so done. I'm finally making an exit plan cause he will never leave this house. When I threatened to leave (about 3 mo. ago) he told me, and I quote "Go for it!". Apparently I'm a joke now. I stopped chasing him little by little over the last few years. In the last few weeks, I stopped chasing him at all. I dont think I want him anymore, whether or not he changes after he has treated me so worthless for so long.
@@MM-Iconoclast Were still in the same house. I've been busy working and being with my close friends & family ;) I want to file for divorce very soon. Working on it. I basically ignore him. It's much more easy to do now lol. I even sleep in another room. I love sleeping alone!
I came across that channel after Margaret passed away, but oh my she looked like an amazing woman, truly the grandmother full of wisdom I've never known.
i dropped her shit off, hugged her, and when she said "bye" all sad... I smirked and said "for now." ... turned away and never looked back. focus on self improvement and you'll get better and she'll eventually regret it lol. you dont actually want her back!
After 2 months of no contact, he reached out to me, but he didn’t feel regret, he didn’t want to make the relationship work. So reaching out does not mean they are into us.
Every word on what you are going through is true. And it WAS like a faucet had been turned off! I did do the crying the begging the pleading, the texts. . . . . . Thank goodness i found you both not long after. The confusion! The anguish! The physical pain. . . . . At first as a ploy to get my partner back i was inviting him round, texts, making him dinner, asking him to fix things, using our son as an excuse. . . How can you make someone miss you when you are giving them everything they always had? I urge you to slow down and follow their advice. It's hard, unbearably so. I actually had to lock myself away upstairs last week to stop myself going down and either bleeding all over him or handling things really badly. I mean, i don't know what's going to happen, but i 100% do believe in the process. Thanks So so much.
In my experience with no contact, I have had 5 out of 6 of my exes come back, I completely disappear, remove them from all social media, the average time has always been about the 3 month mark when they reach out, but others were 6 months, some I've had even 5 years later they are still looking for me, saying they can't forget me. It's disappointing though because usually by then I've moved on and don't wish to have them back. Can u do a complete video of the Applebee's girl situation? We only get tid-bits of the story LOL
5/6? DAMN. For some reason I can't get myself to remove them from social media though... she ended things saying she isn't ready, im her best friend and she doesnt deserve me, its unfair & that she needs to figure herself out she's too lost & wants to figure herself out (she's avoidant .. im anxious). I've just been staying off of social media, not posting. It makes me wonder if she'll ever come back or not honestly.
@@SR0490 Watch the video by Craig Kenneth, "Meeting Your Ex Where They're At" it's a great one for trying to understand their side of the coin and having empathy of where they are at in their life. And "If I Leave My Ex Alone, Will They Miss Me?" is one of my all-time favorites. My most recent ex (also my best friend) just ended the relationship over Xmas for the same reason, said he wasn't ready for a relationship, had to figure his life out, etc. as he was younger than me by a lot. This video Meeting Your Ex Where They're At really helped me put things into perspective and have empathy for him and his situation. I'm pretty sure he will come back because I treated him like gold and he will see how the others/next gf won't compare to me. It is unfair, but try not to take the rejection too personally, if it would be personal, he or she would never have started a relationship with you anyway. I'm anxious too and I had an avoidant ex come back at the 7 month mark but he messed too much with my head and played too many games during the relationship so I did not even answer his texts. Avoidants don't mesh well with anxious. I have always done the no contact rule, and it really works (I'm an experienced no-contacter LOL). And don't check their social media, it only causes you more pain and you start assuming things that are probably not true. I also didn't post anything during NC, this also gives them a chance to wonder about you and they will have to come directly to the source if they want to know about your life. Up your gym workouts, take new classes at the gym, or try a new hobby, bike rides, take long walks, get a dog, take weekly massages if you can as it boosts the oxytocin in your brain, see friends, I purchased the workbooks The Knowledge to understand relationships better, and I listened to Craig Kenneth every day and night all day long to soothe my anxiety whenever I felt like I was going to break NC and I also did lots of holistic therapy (Reiki, sound healing, biomagnets, etc. to calm me) and I stayed away from any distractions like going to bars, etc. because as an anxious I knew I could be lured into dating a new person, so I just focused all in on myself and healing. 5/6 of my exes did come back, so I can confidently say that there is a good chance your ex will reach out, just give her time and space. Stay strong, you can do this! Have Discipline or Fail! LOL
@@spacito8617 Ive watched it and rewatch many videos over and over. It is definitely a good one. I am just hoping I'll get a chance to turn things around and implement what im learning and now understand. I guess I'll give her the time to understand. NC is on for legit only 2 weeks. I have a feelings it'll be a long way to go.
@@spacito8617 starting I did begging and pleading and sending memories.... He just ignored me.... And I was calling him daily and texting him so much big big paragraph..... At least for one month.... Ltr he just blocked me... Ltr I started texting him from my friends and family members number.... He just blocked me... And didn't even contact me at all.... It's almost 2 and half month he blocked me everywhere...... He screams to be very happy now.... He is enjoying so much like before.... His shop is very near to my home... He is not even trying to meet me or call me.... He just moved on.... I'm getting scared....
@@spacito8617 now I'm totally bind... I just kept quite from past one month and I saw law of attraction videos and working on that.... He has done my insult.... But to I like him so much..... I'm shocked so much.... He has moved on
It's been 6 months since last contact. I have seen him twice on dating apps & looking great & happy on social media. He is done. I think once a few months go by, it's time to let go & move on.
Hey, May be I dnt know u, may me I never saw u or talked to you. Bt I want to say everything will be fine and awesome. You are a wonderful person and u deserve a lot of love and respect.❤ All this universe and I m with you . You will be happy
I'd genuinely like to hear stories about people who went no contact, was contacted by their ex and then went on to have a long term relationship. Anyone?
I really, really appreciate the both of you. Of all the channels that touch on no contact and letting go, honestly this is the most in-depth, insightful and respective of both the process and turmoil of the breakup
9 months of no contact did a world of good. I needed space and time to figure out how to move on in my life. I broke up with my ex and I got the shock of my life when he reached out wanting to sort things out.
Every time I feel like contacting my ex..I watch these videos😊 and I then drop the idea of reaching out. These videos give me inspiration to stick to NC. 😊
Thank you Craig and Margaret for these amazing videos. I learned many things from your videos that changed my life and put me on a positive path. 😊🙏🏼😊🙏🏼 your help is greatly appreciated.
I cry so hard, nearly everyday. I can’t mend. Thanks for the comforting words. My ex had reached out within one week but had an ultimatum, I declined that because it was not what we had agreed upon originally at beginning of relationship and it’s something I’d prefer to conclude in my own mind, not being persuaded by others. Now I see things tiny bit different but he won’t even talk to me or call me back after totally devaluing my ENTIRE EXISTENCE.
I am focusing on myself, and I have improved so much. Hopefully my ex decides to try us once more. I know she will be floored by the improvements I have made.
I tried to move on from a partner who betrayed me for 6 months before dumping me in the cold way described here. She had plenty of time to try out her new man and I didn’t stand a chance. That was nearly 40 years ago and I’ve suffered trauma ever since. Life can deal some of us a cruel hand and that’s all there is to it.
I couldnt thank you more than enough. You were my comfort thru the crazy storms. I was always told or knew that no contact rule should last for atleast 30 days regardless if the ex contacted me that i should just ignore it. You are the first coach i listened to that opposed that idea. While i was on my 1st week of NCR, my housemaid told me that my ex has been communicating with her and that he intends to talk to me tomorrow (after how many harassing messages he sent me also for many days), i was so anxious to break the NCR and this gave me so much hope that yes, you will break the NCR if they want to reach out to you. And this time, on the 8th day of NCR, I was surprised- instead of receiving his harrassing messages as i am accustomed to them, i recieved a formal CAN WE TALK? I WANT TO TALK TO YOU NICELY AND TALK ABOUT THINGS PROPERLY. I immediately gave him a thumbs up and he called right away. I was surprised that he talked to me in a dignified and in a more respectful tone. I was used to his harassment, verbal abuse and screaming- but this time, he was different. And we took the time to reconcile things, and now we are happy and contented with taking things slow. Thanks coach. You saved my life. I was very determined to ignore this ex till 30 days. And i saw this before it happened.
@@MM-Iconoclast right now we no longer are together. No matter how desperate and foolish i was, this vid worked. But now i no longer tolerate his ass. I hate him. He still wants to keep in touch but i got tired.
My situation is tragic. My boyfriend broke up with me because of threats from his adult children. We had a very nice, easy going relationship and loved each other. Your videos help me understand what’s happening and what to do next.
Everyone is just telling me to accept that it's completely over. I can't even handle daily life tasks. I miss him so much. I don't want to accept that it's over. I'm a very anxious and my ex is avoident. I doubt he'll regret his decision.
I hope you both find the strength to make it through. My three-year relationship just ended a few weeks ago so I’m right there in the same boat with you guys. We can do this be strong.
Been long doing a lot of work on myself, so I stayed away from he channel for the time as I have to let a lot of information sink in. And now that I'm back, I still love how you're working together. Craig you're handsome 🥰🥰 Margaret you look so great!!!
One of your best videos! I am also doing the workbooks and can’t tell your how much they are helping right now. Thank you both so much! 🙏💕
Do you love the workbooks?
Coach Craig Kenneth I LOVE the workbooks! They are keeping me busy and positive during this tough time. Also, it may be a strange ask but any chance you guys would be willing to touch on weathering this crisis when you are also going through losing your partner? I heard that my ex-partner is happily shacked up with his new woman while we all hunker down🤮 and I wonder if this will bring him and his rebound closer together…would love to hear your take on how to deal with all of this while the world has completely turned upside down... thanks! 🙏
@@CoachCraigKenneth Where can I find your workbooks?
Only on my website
@@CoachCraigKenneth question it’s been 10 month since the break up and he still text me every three days saying hey I want to do no contact but I don’t wanna ignore him and I’ve been following his lead this whole time and we haven’t grown any closer granite I slip up and I send long text messages every now and again but I want to do a no contact I want him to realize it and I wanna he’ll do I just ignore him?
Trust the process. Walk away, let things go. If they value you, you’ll hear from them. In the meantime, personal growth and abundance in your life is key. I had an ex come back 6 times, thanks to no contact and growth. It works.
J Brazo wow !! That is awesome
Videos on Top this woman in particular seems to keep coming back in my life. I think it’s truly because I’ve gone into no contact right away, gave it time, let things go and moved on assuming I’d never hear from her again. I’ve always focused on learning relationship skills, developing my own skills, hitting the gym, setting goals and really just becoming a better partner.
Well if she came back 6 times after getting rejected every time then that sounds excellent on your part (though it can be a nuisance, happened to me as well). But if we are talking about getting back together and breaking up repeatedly, it sounds toxic and you better hope she doesn't come back again haha, nobody is worth all that drama and energy.
Onur Böle well I mean she reached out after 7-8 months and a short term relationship....a huge part of me is slashing don’t do it...we’re meeting next Friday....it always ends with us hooking up... then casually dating... we’ll see
Videos on Top any insight I can give, I’d be glad to. Yes, lol I’ve actually been playing for 16 years
As someone with an undergrad degree in Psychology, with a core focus in Social Psychology, I have to say that everything Coaches Craig and Margaret say is dead on. When a breakup occurs and a strong attachment exists the person doing the dumping is experiencing the negative arousal of Cognitive Dissonance. To overcome this they use the phenomenon of Confirmation Bias. Initially they only look to confirm they did the right thing in breaking up ignoring all else. This protects them from facing the negative feeling associated with their decision. But, because negative memories fade faster than positive ones, that they start to remember the good times more than then bad. This leads them to swing the other way, grieving what they have lost. But this is just my 2 cents.
That's some really good insight. During this time I've been really concerned my ex's GOOD memories will fade. Luckily, we had SO many amazing memories. It is encouraging to know the mind will amplify those, not downplay them.
The faded affect bias
I like your two cent. I hope that is exactly what happens.
Well said and most definately needed to hear your 2 cents...
Worth more like 2 million...
Thx so much !!
what if they go back to their ex in 5 days ?
After a 5 month separation of my girlfriend of four years, she contacted me one day about “our cat”. During this time I had really just focused on myself, gotten sober, changed jobs, and worked on my mental health. I learned to be comfortable with being alone. Now we have been together since December of 2022 again. We have a better relationship than we ever have, but I know if things were to not work out I will survive just as I did when we were separated.
Congrats brother hopefully I get this outcome
can you give more info? what was the original reason for breakup? was there any pleading?
Glad it's working out for you. This no contact is amazing. Been 21 years and she's gonna call any day now, I can feel it. Seriously though, years ago there were so many signs and coincidences that were pretty uncanny. Apparently signs are complete BULLS**T.
God bless you brother!
still together ?
These two people keep me sane during no contact.
God bless them to no end.
Update us bro!
What happened?
Please update!
he is my therapist , doesnt know it
No contact allows you to slowly feel comfortable by yourself again. Once you know that you can go on without them, you're set for life. If they contact you again, give it a shot, if you want to. If they don't reach out, who cares, you're over that lifestyle and there are plenty more people in this world to find happiness with.
Yeah
Exactly! This is the true purpose of no contact. To process a loss, grieve and move on. This has nothing to do with the other person coming back or not. You get to decide later if you want them back or not based on if it’s in your best interest. If they don’t come back, more often than not, you don’t even notice because you’ve moved on with your life.
Needed to hear this. Thank you for your warm words
I don't think you should reply if they try to contact you. Why open that wound? No
I have MS and most of the time you would never know it he said he broke up with me because of that my flares and symptoms are far and few between iRun I workout I work full-time you would never know I had a condition two times he's made it clear that it gives him anxiety how can it move that he wasn't even there one of the times is this a cop out
I am writing this to the people that are hurting, waiting for their ex, a girl/guy their talking to to reach out during no contact. I want you all to know that some day it will be okay. Even if they don’t contact, they don’t necessarily want to get back together sometimes. But the fact that they reached out to you after God knows how long is a BIG win for you! Celebrate the wins. I pray that your relationship with your person rekindles back. If had some type of connection with this person and you do no contact VERY WELL, I guarantee you, you’ll feel so much better! Not only will it allow your ex to reach out but it will allow to you to grow and become an even stronger person than before. I’m saying this through personal experience and I’ve grown a lot and working things out. God bless you guys
Thanks alot
Guys don't listen to people commenting "nope, if they left you they were never yours", they're just telling their stories indirectly. You follow YOUR heart, not theirs
Yes ❤
Yup
I applied the no contact rule for 7 weeks and did everything according to your videos. I did not beg or plead, I used social media to show him my new and improved self. He went from cutting all contact with me for WEEKS to chasing me (he literally stood outside my house crying begging me to come out). We met and now he's obsessed with me, he can't even ben without me one hour without texting. He even asked me to move in with him again! Thank you for everything. Stay strong everybody!
Nora Noren same situation but he doesn’t contact me... it’s been 7 weeks since he stopped talking with me
This story gives me hope :) Congratulations!
T J don’t block them. That just shows him or her that you still care and are bothered by the break up. Also, do not ever go to their social media.. it’s just picking an old scab..it won’t heal that way. I realized every time I peeked his profile I would feel like shit so I just stopped. Took a bit of willpower at first but now I’m good. That was also the one thing that really helped me start moving on . Good luck
T J I get it... I had a rough day yesterday. It passes
Wow!! Truly amazing, really wish the happens to me.
Boy, he's not lying about the physical pain. OMG This shit is awful!
Im sitting with my ex in break room right now 6 months no contact all kinds of hoover, breadcrums etc etc , it gets easier 🤗
I hope you guys are doing ok?!
This shit is murder. Omg. First day of no contact. It’s hard as fuck.
@@sadep0330 day six for me. The pain is rough. Knowing that this time there is no emotional turmoil, because I can see where it went wrong what we are both at fault for, leaves it "neat and tidy". That is unsettling.
@@dominiquespeaks7308 you're okay, pal. I dont need to swap numbers.
This is so true. It took my ex 3.5 months to reach a point where she wanted to reconcile. You just need to give it enough time. Because if they don’t reconsider their decision you will reach a place where it does not matter as much anymore. Use this time to grow on your own because you will never be as motivated or dedicated to selfwork as you are at this time. Stay strong and love yourself.
Good message
good luck, love people ♥️♥️♥️
I won't take her back if she's been dating around and then trying to get back with me. I would feel that I was the backup instead of the priority.
@@Gong14921 if that is really how you feel then of course, that is how you should act.
I feel, however, that that stance is one of insecurity. (This need not apply to your specific situation, it is just my general opinion.)
@@magnussahlstrom4172 can you please elaborate a bit more? Because I was looking at it from a place of self-respect, but maybe you have another view that I haven't considered.
These videos always help with my anxiety. I woke up from a very vivid dream of reconciliation and it stung to know it wasn’t real.
Yea..I feel you.hurt even more if it's breadcrumbs. I am going through it.hurts to know the person can change so much it's like you don't even know who they are.in my case,I got diagnosed with a heart condition and liver condition within 6 months of this breakup. The heart problems and other issues started right after the breakup and he may seem like he cared and asked me how I am but eventually he doesn't care anymore and couldn't care less even if I drop dead in front of him.I am already going through the breakup then the health problems...he knows it and is still mean,cold savage and harsh and very unapologetic about hurting or upsetting me whether on purpose or not.I am still trying to heal.
I’ve had several of those recently. Dreams really can be the fucking worst sometimes
I had a dream recently that mine said sorry and wanted me back.i woke up SO EXCITED!!!!! Then I realized it wasn't true. I feel for you...
I've been having those every single day and it hurts so much 💀
Me
Too. Thought the break up was a nightmare but it was it. So so so sad and lonely
A moment of silence for who got dumped 😂
Just ignore the ex and keep dancing👊
😍😍😍😭
Yeah
Margret is awesome. She reminds me of my g ma when she loved me a child. Great advice
I do like to dance thanks 🙏🏼
Well Craig and Margaret are speaking exactly the truth. I did the dumping once and then after five months I felt a strong regret and was reaching out to that person like crazy. So guys believe it, the dumper is going to give themselves a second thought of what they have done eventually.
Thank you!
Absolutely it’s True that what Craig and Margaret say about most Dumpers do give second chances too decent Ex Partners
My LDR Ex is extremely receptive too our chats and has been giving me hints that’s the door is open again 😬
Indeed that's true and then the dumped can show them the middle finger .
@@andreamagyar7776 That's what I'm looking forward to
Coach Craig Kenneth you mentioned that if they reach out about anything (breadcrumbs) that is good and we should respond. 1. Does that give the ok to initiate contact next or go back to NC? The guy I was dating for 2 years sent a text about something not important a week ago and his texts aren’t so loving and animated like they have been the last 2 years. I think we’re all wondering if breadcrumbs are just their way of keeping us on a string?
The best part of the entire video was when both y'all said in unison, "DUMPERS DO REGRET THEIR DECISION!". 😀😄😂
I don't. Dumped his ass for a reason. He didn't give a shit when he had me and never will. Works on ur self esteem. I only feel sad for him cuz he's too old to be a fuckboy and all the empty sex with all the hos on Earth can't begin to compare to the love and loyalty of a real woman. Most importantly he never got to hit this fine ass!! Loser!!!
@@dw9658 lol. Dag girl!
@Plug Walk that fool already tried to come back twice if it's any of ur business. I still don't miss his lying ass. There is more to miss about a real woman than sex.
Yes!!🙏💯
@@dw9658 same, girl, same!
That's what I really needed to hear "dumper is gonna regret and go through those same emotions". This session really helped me without any bullshit tactics and not damaging my thoughts of moving on. Understanding the actual power of time.
100% agree. Same. 👊🏽
Yes im going through the same emotions Im depressed and regret it
I'm the dumper and I don't regret it. I went no contact so as to not get sucked back in. I would never go back without a sincere apology and him showing real progress working on his problems
By the time they contact you, chances are, you don't want the relationship as it was when it ended. The first couple weeks is the hardest, but it is the most important part. That starts the ball of doubt rolling every so slightly. Every week it starts gaining momentum.
YES!
Yup
Going through it now. Got dumped 2 weeks ago and been in no contact since, at first it was extremely hard but each day that passes I'm getting better and less interested in reconnecting.
@LeeEverett1 Way to go! It is hard, but necessary. I used to think about when I broke up with a girl, and she left me alone, was I sure it was the right thing. The ones that kept trying and got a little crazy were ALWAYS no way to try again. Good luck! I found my person 10 months ago, she is worth what I went thru to be available to her.
@@BjManberries Yeah it's tough man it just shocks me that she'd let this fall apart so easily. We had one small dispute, our first dispute in the whole relationship and she basically ran and ghosted me. My thoughts keep telling me that I'm thinking about it more than her and she's just living life not having any doubts. Makes me lose hope that she'll ever reach out anyway, 2 weeks is a long time IMO compared to us talking daily.
Glad to hear you found someone
If you walk away & don't look back it shakes them to know they're not worth a backwards glance. When you realize that it's actually true? That's when that person no longer seems at all appealing to you no matter how much you once loved them✌️✌️
Be careful with the "not ignoring them" if they're texting you. They could still be texting you because they want to hold onto you even after you guys aren't together anymore, not because they want to/are ready to get back together. I had a mutual breakup with my bf and he kept texting me everyday like normal, not because he wanted to get back together but because he wanted to feel like he still had me somehow. Let them feel the loss, let them miss you and use this time to heal and move on.
Going through this now and it’s only been a week 😢 The breakup wasn’t mutual tho. Like what’s the point in texting if you broke things off.
I need a hug from the both of you . I don't want you to stop talking in this video.
nikki khas 74 same
Same ❤️
I know. I've watched it 2x in a row....maybe 3.
Same
The secret is you have to stay strong & firm. Prayers is the key to endure it, then if he comes back he is yours, if he’s not he never was. I’m telling this to myself 😁 Thanks Coach Margaret & Coach Craig❤️
I recommend you to a man who can help you manifest whatever and whoever you want to manifest within two-day ♥️♥️♥️
He was the person who helped me manifest back my ex three days ago with out delay 💯 💯💯
Whtsaap him**
___+ 2::3::4::81::40::79::93::23...
@@emilykane465 Tell me Sis
I’ve been on both sides of this. For anyone who maybe made some mistakes after the breakup here’s a story that might give you hope. I can say no contact absolutely had an effect on me. I broke up with someone I had reconciled with (after being broken up for around two years w zero contact) because they had become controlling and manipulative because of their insecurities and it was overwhelming, I couldn’t even have a nap or hang out with friends because of their need for me to respond to texts, and it drove me back to someone else. The breakup was awful, we had been together officially for about five months but very close for way longer. They begged and pleaded and spammed me for weeks, harmed themselves, I had to reach out to one of their friends at one point because I was concerned for their safety. I tried to stay in their life because I cared but it was an outburst every other day because they were hurting and it caused me a lot of stress and was clearly not helping them heal. After two months of this one day they asked me straight up if I was seeing someone else and I told them the truth, they were very upset and ended up saying they couldn’t talk anymore and had to stop all contact. I agreed and did feel guilty, but was also relieved it was over. I was sad but it didn’t last long as I was excited and happy about being with the other person. Then after around three months it just started to hit me. I forgot the negative feelings and just missed them, I couldn’t see what they were doing on social media at all, I thought about them every day and started feeling just awful. At four months I was crying over it often, even being with someone else. The tables turned completely. Then they texted me one day (right after I had been crying over it lol) looking for closure, but we ended up reconnecting. We didn’t date again, we were close for awhile and were intimate occasionally (both being single at this time) but neither of us had really worked on ourselves so it didn’t last. The friendship fizzled out and they removed me from their socials a few weeks ago with no explanation and I’ve just accepted we outgrew each other.
Now I’m on the other end with someone else, going no contact and working on myself while they’re in a rebound hoping they’ll go through what I went through and reach out someday. Almost feels like karma. But I’ve made so much progress with my mental health I’m almost glad the breakup happened, I’ve realized the mistakes I made and I’m working on fixing my unhealthy and toxic tendencies. And I do believe he’ll come back eventually, he always does as soon as I move on. :-) Good luck to everyone going through this, it’ll all work out in the end no matter the outcome!!
Thank you for sharing this! I think my "ex" is in her relief phase right now and im working on myself and hitting the gym. Whatever happens happens but I'm moving forward either way
worked for me with the most stubborn woman in the world.. Took 3 months of no contact , I mean no contact.. Its hard as hell but it works
@tj.. nope if I did that she can’t contact me .. I just didn’t contact her at all no matter what
@@teddyboy9116 still holding strong?
@@teddyboy9116 stay strong. I'm in the same boat
@@teddyboy9116 yeah, mine is 30 minutes away. I came across her at a lake nearby but that was an hour from both of us. Craziest coincidence in my life. Stay strong, if I could still stay NC after seeing her. You can
Hey , im now on day 1 i tried and i always find myself reaching out. I hate that i have no self control. I saw on Instagram that he followed some girls and we broke up about a week ago. Drive me crazy!!!! He blocked me everywhere!! And his parents doesn’t answer me at all. Idk what i did so wrong that i deserves that. Anyway now im blocked even on email . I really trying not to contact , i dont wanna make hopes that he will come back cause its not likely that he will even unblock me.
Our society puts so much emphasis on relationships but not many young people know how to be healthy single
Realest comment. We can’t truly value the addition of a partner until we have learned to love ourselves and be ok with being alone.
Well then this is for the people that desire to be in relationships.
We crave relationships in all forms Stu
@James Bond Ok, so go desesperate to find a partner
You guys are amazing. Married 28 years wife left for another. I did all the wrong things. She didn't come back, I would have done anything for her to come back. Now after many years I am glad she didn't.
In many cases it’s good that they are not coming back!
Marisa Marino maybe the majority of cases
Yes I feel that way it’s peaceful and stress free...
Definitely
This.. cause she is a cheating &^$
I went no contact, man it was hard but, I was good. 5 months later, just when I was just getting over him he showed up at my place at midnight yelling my name outside my window. I let him in because he was a little tipsy and loud. He was shaking like a leaf so, I let him sleep on my couch. We conversed and he said being lonely sucks. It’s a longer story but, we’ve been back together for six months now. He’s an avoidant and is getting better everyday. He still can’t say I love you but, his actions say otherwise. I’m doing my best to be a good partner but, I’m still a little scared but, not like before. My anxiety has gone way down. I am open with him but, not super needy. I try and do the things I’ve learned from Craig and Margaret and am constantly working on bettering myself but, for me. It’s gotta be for yourself not for them. You’ll be stronger, happier and healthier! Thanks Craig and Margaret for making me a better person and partner. You got me through a really long and tough time.
Brenda did you went to NC immediately?
Gao Ang, I did. Unfortunately, he broke up with me again about a month ago. He wouldn’t open up and I was getting frustrated and he knew it and knew he was causing it. Btw I was extremely patient with him. His actions said love but, he has never said it. He told me he loves things about me but, not me. He also said he wanted to experience other people. His idea of experiencing other people is three dates and done. He has a teenage son with addiction problems which affected the relationship also and he avoided dealing with this too. I tried to open his eyes about it but, he didn’t want to hear it. Avoidant to a T. I’m in no contact again and most likely will not hear from him as I told him not to contact me. The sad thing about it is he has taught his son to be like this and he has no idea how much damage this has caused. I love him very much but, I know he has years of trouble ahead with the kid and he may never change or accept love or trust anyone ever. (Ex wife cheated then married a millionaire 6 months later which devastated him) I could go on but, I’m trying to focus on myself and this makes my head spin. I’m meditating and breathing to relax my mind, working out and dating a little. Hopefully, in a few months I’ll forget him and find someone who can love and communicate better because I deserve it.
Brenda Sienkiewich thanks for sharing the story , I told myself don’t give hope but still missing him , his real reason is he is afraid he is going to regret if he marry and now I’m in China he is in Italy then he said distance and border is the biggest problem better break up now than later ( we have seen each other 7 months ), he was such warm guy with me and a guy would do everything for me but he took it back at one day .
Nothing to complain but I want back with him , and get over him
Did you have any other relationship during no contact period?? Im on day 25 of no contact.
@@fatimahk89 I tried dating, slim pickings out there. We got back together a little over a year ago and have been doing good.
They’re right ... but also be prepared, because even if you follow this advice, which is great advice, it doesn’t guarantee anything, sometimes people will move on regardless, so accept that could happen... Have hope but also be realistic and work on yourself...
I got Dumped last on December 2019. I was needy I begged and pleaded so bad but guess what I did No contact for 3 months and she called me today, so far everything is flowing through nicely now and we gonna have dinner together next weekend. We both so happy no contact is the only way to go goodbuddies
Awwww so happy for you!!!!!!!!!
Wow... I'm happy for you guys. Good luck!!
How was the dinner, if it already happened? :) Im NC Day 45.
Hi Sam
Great news for you getting back with your ex hope things are going strong. My situation is the same I was dumped in February for being too needy and I chased her for months I'm now in no contact for last 3 weeks I know she isn't seeing anyone and when I last saw her by mistake when passing each other at a shopping centre she looked tired and a bit more weight .I'm doing all the self improvement gym drum lessons new hairstyle new clothes I lost 14kilos so when she saw me I'm sure she would have noticed the changes
Congratulations on getting back together I hope it's going strong. I'm exactly the same I did so much chasing stalking and now I've stopped ...I hope she returns it's been 7 months
Craig and Margaret and everyone here I just wanted to post that I have a good friend of mine [ who called me with this news]who broke up with the "love of her life" 26 years ago. Recently she put her profile on facebook and guess what the love of her life contacted her and they started seeing each other again. They have been in no contact with each other for almost three decades. So guys you never know.? Believe me Margaret and Craig know what they are talking about so work on yourself and be happy with your self and your life . Remember you had a life before them!!!!! Wonderful, insightful video as usual.... you both are amazing!
I had an ex recently start contacting me again, after 10 years. And I was so crazy back then to him, after we split I went into deep depression and contacted him so much, incessantly and ruined everything. Cried for two years, took about 4 to feel like I could finally let go to feel better, decided to stay single on own completely for 9 yrs.. and as soon as I got to a place within me to date someone new, and started liking this new person.. My ex contacted me. It felt like a universal wakeup call at the time. I didn't want him back because I'd finally let go of the hurt and started liking this new guy I was dating, so I focused on him.... well, after only a few months 😔 I'm back in the same boat but with the guy I now like, ending things and heartbroken. And my other ex, is now calling me frequently. I'm glad I'm only at friends mindset with him now, because that pain was way too deep to ever go there again.... but my point, yes.. Hadn't heard from him for a decade! So it can definitely happen everyone. I'm glad for you friend Holly, that it's a different situation for her. Though from what I've witnessed in my circle of life, that can often be a repeat about to happen of something that was never truly healed.. so I hope her case ends as an exception and not that. Xx
This Thnks giving my ex from 40yeas ago emailed me and we started talking 2 or 3-hour sessions twice a week for ten weeks until I said let's stop this so we tried and now it's really hard to, She's in a part-time relationship and lives 2000 miles away. Anxiety all over again. but every two or three days a text or an email pops up!
Oh nah, don’t come back to
me after 3 decades. 🥴Lord have mercy
A woman leaves mentally before she leaves physically. I do not like to let go of people, I try to keep trying even though they kept being so mean. It took him to really hurt me for me to let go.
Uh a lot of people leave mentally before they leave physically. Smh
Preach
A.lot of people do this...why do people think only women do this?
I like that last line, it took them to really hurt us to let go ..
I got back with my ex and mother of my child 2 days ago after she left me 6 months ago. I took all your advice Craig and it worked. Thank you
ballinlough12345 I’m in the same boat trying to get the mother of my beautiful daughter back , I neglected her and done a lot of silly things , I’ve take my energy away from her and I’m half seeing results but I don’t let anything get to my head... how did you go about it
Did you not talk to her for 6 months ?
Did she sleep with someone else in those 6 months?
Hello Craig, just drop by to say thank you for creating this channel, it’s my most recommended TH-camr channel for sure. Thanks to you, Marguerite and Victoria for all the mental supports to thousands of broken hearts out there.
For countless sleepless nights, your videos helped ppl to get over the darkest time in their life, giving great motivation and hope in believing oneself again.
After a long long period of time, I’ve finally reached the point that I don’t want anyone back and I don’t care if they are living their best or worst life without me. I got myself back. Thank you! God bless you all!
My ex left me just over a month ago, yes I begged and reached out for about 2 weeks, I then went straight in no contact, I haven’t reached out or heard from him, it’s now been 3 weeks,
We were only together for 7 months so I really don’t see us getting back together.
But I’m getting stronger now and don’t even feel like I want him back now.
Thanks to you guys I feel stronger and happier now 🥰🥰🙏
Stay strong! You’re better than begging anyone!!!
Did you ever get back together?
@@victoriawambugu7372 hey no we didn’t get back together, and I still haven’t heard from him, but I’m strong now and I say it’s he’s loss 🤷🏽♀️😁
in 2020 I had the worst heartbreak ever. I wanted that girl back so badly, you couldn't imagine. Now she texted me 2 1/2 years later, how she's missing me and wants me back and would like to start all over again. 2 years ago I would've been so happy to read that message. But meanwhile I know that the breakup was a blessing in disguise. She was a toxic person but my love blinded me. I declined politely and wished her all the best.
I just wanted to let you guys know, exes come back, even years later. But sometimes you don't even want them back at that point. :)
"We live in an age of instant everything." Word!!!
Wow I felt like I just had an actual session with you two! Thank you!! My husband of 7 yrs lost his job due to covid, left me & our 4 children & says we are over. We have been playing this back and forth game and just when I feel like things are doing better he shuts off his emotions blocks me I don’t hear from him for days. I’m going to stop the begging do the no contact and let him feel what life is truelly going to be like when he can’t come running back when he feels like it. You two are awesome!!! And thank you for sharing your knowledge with all of us❤️
So what happened? Would love an update!
@@MM-Iconoclast same
👀👀👀
I had a phone consult with Margaret couple years ago. She's great. Was very helpful. Great listener too. You're both great! Hi Craig and Margaret:)
I’m glad to know I’m not the only one with physical symptoms..it was so scary
I'm with you on this so true
I actually got panic attacks
I literally felt like I was dying and nobody understood
@@waitwhat6882 same!
I have lost a lot of weight
I cried for almost 4 months and cried today as well. Been in no contact for almost 2 months now.
I felt every single things that they described.
Whenever I felt like I am too overwhelmed with feelings and starting to feel anxious in regard to my ex, I listen to these twos and walk for an hour in my neighbourhood until I feel ok.
It’s so painful.
Coach Margaret is like the grandma I never had: warm and nurturing. Mine was more like: domineering and loud. No wonder our family is full of neurotic people.
NC is the hardest thing to do, BUT it get easier AND my ex reached out. He even asked about the cats!!!! (Indirect/direct approach) Thank you coach Craig & coach Margaret!! I continue to learn so much from your content. FOREVER GRATEFUL
Karissa Thomas how long did it take until he reached out to you out of curiosity?:)
simone duty Hey girl! He got his phone back after boot camp and text me 2 days later. 7 months NC total
@@karissakarma2997 and are you back together now?
Io Europa Ganymed Kallisto No. He pursued heavily and made future plans until he ghosted. 2 weeks later, when he had asked me to come visit him on base, pictures were posted of him with another woman. I blocked him again and have completely closed the door. I deserve so much better
@@karissakarma2997 oh... That was... Totally unexpected. Wow. Some people are really trash. In any case, you haven't lost anything, but you have gained a lot of experience and growth through this struggle which makes you stronger in future relationships. 💪
I am dealing with this now. I have taken him back 7 times now and just went NO contact again today. This NEEDS to end!! You are SO correct on ZERO appetite, diarrhea, exhaustion. I used to be so very happy-go-lucky and positive! I feel like a completely different person now, its awful!
True love never die, don't give up anything in life all hope isn't lost.
Hello getting back your ex shouldn't be a problem anymore.
What's>app...the healer....
+ 1 ( "9 0 9" ) "3 1 0" "1 7 8 6"
He have solution to all problems
Currently got a girl going cold on me.
For the first time ever, I’m gonna just let her go instead of chasing her. Already got it in my head she’s gone so it’s either her putting more effort in or me remaining the fun confident guy she originally fell for.
Win win.
Frank wicked 👌
Fun, confident guy 👍🏽👍🏽👍🏽
@Blythe Girl I'm guessing not based on fact he called himself fun and confident lol
"Dumpers do regret their decision"
@Corina Luana Vlad our situations are very different. Im currently going to school, and work a full time job and was working my ass off to provide a better future. I used so much of my energy to push her, and encourage her to do the things she needed and wanted to do. In the end, after 2.5 years she dumps me by removing our relationship status on facebook, no call, no text nothing. I call her, and she saids she is with someone else. I feel worthless, and suicidal.
@@gwynbleiddroach2589 are you good bro?
@@gwynbleiddroach2589 I feel the same way. We were staying together for 5 years even planned a wedding. I cried begged but she said no! What hurts the most is my mum was there saw me at my weakest and even cried but she said no. Ive even done bodily harm to myself I feel as worthless
Not always
@@Master.Ojinaga are you better now? I hope you saw a therapist
I was feeling down and sad. Thank you! I needed to hear this. I feel so much better and will continue with no contact, haven’t heard from him for about 1 month. This message was so helpful and helped me stay strong .. love you guy’s.❤️
hey craig, i just got dumped by someone who i never thought could hurt me. I came across this video at the right time .I am grateful that i came across your video. I do firmly believe if you were honest in a relationships , they are going to realise someday but you can not beg them to see it. TIME, UNIVERSE, FAITH, GOD ,PATIENCE and SELF ESTEEM is something that will open their eyes to look out for you.
Thanks
Updates
Amen
I’m always coming back to the no contact videos because my anxiety causes me to think no contact won’t work on my ex (he’s the one exception) but these videos always help to bring me back to reality.
I’ve watched this video a hundred times on repeat. Gives me some hope. I miss her so much. She said she needs space and her birthday is next week. She is also an FA and I am an AP. Trying to keep my shit together and staying no contact. This sucks but you guys nailed it. Please send me out good vibes…my heart is breaking
Awwww! Been there!
Update?
When you are trying to let go of something, it really helps so much faster when you don't get anything to do with it anymore every single day. That is also true with letting go of someone. And it surely takes time. Great content, Craig!
20 yrs together and he doesn’t even talk to me anymore. And now he’s “ building with the woman he left me for”.. devastated.. I did nothing wrong . I feel like I was bad or something was wrong with me . This is so hard. He don’t even seem like he’s affected at all. All I can see is them being happy together and bonding. I feel
Like I’m grieving and I can’t get out of this self sabotaging and having no zest for life anymore while he seems so happy. This broke my spirit
Awwww sweetheart. This was over a year now, I hope your happy and healed💘
Margaret at her finest! My favorite video with her. I miss her. She was a wonderful attachment guide and educator. I’m so grateful i had the opportunity to council with her. ❤
Craig, your videos really help me when I feel anxiety about my breakup and honestly just put me at peace and know that everything will be okay regardless of what happens. I can honestly say after finding these videos they have saved me from own thoughts and feelings. It has been a little over a month since the breakup, I am finally going to truthfully begin no reaching out. It is a little difficult because we do go to the same church together. but right now I have hope and I am going to work on myself.
I just found out he had thrown out the things (gifts) I have given him.. which hurt and I'm not so sure what that means but if I can have some clarity on that.. that would be great.
Hang in there everybody.
This was sooooo helpful, Craig and Margaret!!! Thank you!
PS - Applebee's should be paying you for all of the exposure you provide them! 🤭
Monique Vermeulen but it was a terrible experience at Applebee’s! 😆 So maybe they don’t want to be associated with breakups? 🤣🤷♀️
@@Jen-fq1jz, any publicity is good publicity! 🤭
@@moniquevermeulen7779 hope you are with a good man!
It really hurts to hear that he might have been thinking about this for quite a while and I was thinking about our future together 😞
Yeah that stings. And then out of the blue they say we need to talk. Mine broke up w me over a text. Can you believe that?!
@@sofiahussein3751 happened to me. Broke up with me over a text. I asked for us to meet and talk but said he can’t make it
@@earthman0x I pleaded w him almost begged him to explain what went wrong he said he wasn’t happy
@@sofiahussein3751 I’m so sorry. I also pleaded and begged him to talk to me, to take me back but to no avail. It sucks because just like that , they seem to have no feelings at all. Been in no contact since february, i broke nc in april but didn’t get any reply and i felt worst. I hope u feel better soon
@@earthman0x aw I wish you all the best love. Hope you get the best man in the world ❤️
My heart is transmitting and radiating so much love for you both and all that you do, honestly, forever grateful
nice shirt, margaret!
Omg I love it, too!
Success story here! After two weeks of No Contact, she finally messaged me and within that short period of time, she realized how much worse her life had gotten without me. She was amazed by my newfound emotional intelligence and is falling in love with me all over again. DO THE WORK! TIME WILL WORK IN YOUR FAVOR IF ITS MEANT TO BE. BUT ITS ESSENTIAL THAT YOU DO THE WORK! Coach Craig is right!
Hi coaches, your videos are the most detailed ones on youtube and also these keeps me still sane amid anxiety and loneliness due to breakup. Keep up the good work!
Are you stlll alone 🙂
The power of love has the power to render us helpless,even kill us literally!! Songs, stories,books have been written about this emotion, God bless all the broken hearted 🙏💔
He reached out yesterday...after one year and four months of no contact. (I thought this stuff only happened to other people 🤭). "No contact" works, if used as directed. Worst case scenario, if they don't come back, you've regained your dignity and respect.
Awesome. How many times have you done The Knowledge in that time?
When they both say “dumpers do regret their decisions”. 🙌. It ain’t gonna be the same without coach Margaret. I’ve never missed someone I never met so much before
9:50 just gave me the most confidence to stay strong it's almost like it's a sickness to feel like this everyday.
In week 6 of NC.
Been running, biking, lifting some dumbbells, watchin rocky training montages, and doing a decent job stayin off social media.
If what i provided for her was truly something she loved, (which i do believe she did love) then maybe someday, ill hear from her.
Stay busy!
Update?
@SLM M Staying busy gets you out of the house first off. At some point you have to actually get up and do something.
Update wise, I've moved on, been roughly 6 months since the break up and yeah I feel alot better.
@@heathertaylor3256 been doing better, been working 40 to 50 hours a week, gaming with the bros, it definitely gets better when you get out of the house
@@Coleslaw97 I’m only on day 3 and it’s killing me, not been out the house since Sunday when he called it off. Lockdown doesn’t help either, hard times 😞
@@Coleslaw97 day 6 he messaged 🙏
I'm the dumpee and my mind is running like a jet plane taking off.. it hurts to feel the emotionless reaction 😢😢
@Frangipani Yang thanks for your insight, when I get the time I'll look at that. I'm a freestyle fitness instructor and omg it's hard to focus on preparing written workouts when my mind is elsewhere. I know I got stuff personally to work on and I hear talking helps and therapy. Sometimes I feel I've got not much energy to even organise that. I heard on this podcast about breaking up etc and no contact. Frankly I don't even know if it was her or me to initiate not reaching out. I did tell her some other time to me to visit if she'll have me back and she deep down will always be that friend but not right now I need to heal. Next day or next 5 days she never contacted me. So I may have started it and she left me be or she left me be due to a lash out at the heat of the moment and feels guilt..
I feel the same way...
Have faith in God
Amen
Through GOD....
ALL things ARE possible !!
@@iamthestorm1004 true💖🤗🥰
God is good💖🙏🤗
@@pdthinks
Amen
ALL the time 🙌🙏💕
@@iamthestorm1004 are u alright friend??
I couldn't agree more. When the coaches with the real deal speak you just know they know their stuff. This is one of the best videos on these issues I've watched. 👍👍👍
Bro. I’m gonna keep it real. Every time I smile. I see my ex. I invited my ex girlfriend out one day, and the people that know me asked us both if we were related. They told us that we look like brother and sister, but we were dating at the time. And when I used to look at photos of us two side by side. I can actually see what people were talking about. She broke up with me, but for some reason she would call me nonstop after the breakup, she would drive by my house, she would email me, she would call me off different numbers. I don’t know if she still thinks of me, or has she moved on, but I’ve been working on myself, I’ve improved financially, and mentally. Physically fit now. I do miss her touch, and the way she tasted. If she reached out to me now. I would take my time, and answer. But I would talk to her. We were together for 9 month’s.
Success story here!! My ex bf and I are back together. We were broken up for a little over a month. He said he still loves me and everyday he thought of me and everything made him think of me. I was in NC for about 25 days until I reached out about money I needed from him for concert tickets I still had. He sent over the money and we had very sporadic and random chill conversations every other day for about a week. I really felt like he only replied to my texts to be polite because we didn’t really end on bad terms. His replies were casual and seemed apathetic. So finally I asked an open ended question and asked how he was doing. Then we had a whole day of good conversation then that same day he asked me out to get boba. That same night but he said he was scared that I was going to move on and had to tell me he still loves me and missed everything about me. We both agreed to work on ourselves and push each other to be our best and be a strong couple. I said we can take it slowly and I’m open to it. But ultimately I told him I loved him still too!
Update: we broke up 3 months later
Nothing. Is the key word to remember. Nothing YOU could have said/done would have saved the relationship. They made the choice for you. My last ex, I went through all of what you said. It caught me off guard. i spent 2 weeks not eating/sleeping/ just broken and empty. Experienced Anxiety Attacks everything triggered me someone who has PTSD for the first time in my life. Right after the breakup I called her up and thought It was a misunderstanding or I blew it. Did not call to beg or plead just clarification cause it had not hit me yet. She was cold/emotionless/monotone. Hearing me breaking as it was hitting me did not move her. The thing is when we met she lost her job and I was her rock. A year later I lost my job, it was not a good fit. She was M.I.A in my corner. One day we were in bed and something felt off. She asks me what am I thinking? I replied "I think you will ditch me since I have no job and its difficult to score an interview" She assured me she would never leave me and here she is a month later leaving me.
The advice I got was the following. People that love ya, don't leave ya. When the chips are down, you see who stood with you. She left at my worst and does not deserve me at my best. A cousin suggested to grab everything note/paper memento and put it into an envelope and mail it to her home and the return address from her job. No letter. Let her guess the message. It could say "I am done with you" or "I dont want to remember you" or "I find out something that we will never get back together" and etc. She broke up with me 2 weeks before her birthday. So when I mailed this it arrived the day after her birthday. I just turned out that way. My cousin had tolled me the 2nd week and I did first thing monday. My sister volunteered and dropped off everything my ex gave me to goodwill. Why keep her memory alive and keep the hurt alive in my heart.
I wish Coach Craig were to include how some of these exes that deeply hurt us may have been NPD. Narcissistic Personality disorder. After watching channels such as AngieAtkinson and Assc Direct and Narcology Unscripted. You see the patterns that Coach Craig says about exes and are related to NPD. Such as at first your partner love bombed the hell out of you. Second is they devalue you where they pick at you and start fights. Gaslighting comes in and leaves you 2nd guessing everything. 3rd is they discard you at your worsts. 4th They try to hoover (like the vacuum) you back and repeat the cycle. After dealing with Narcs you feel depleted, exhausted mentally and broken. Sound like what Coach is talking about and you never see the breakup. Also a woman rarely leaves you unless she has someone else lined up. My ex kept on hanging out and talking a lot with 1 male guy friend from her circle. Never had the proof but had a strong hunch. Oh well, not my prob. She became his problem.
Time passed and I reconnected with extended family. Healed and learned a new craft and career. I deleted and rebuilt my social media but never put anything personal other than related to my new business venture. A week before valentines day she went around all of my blocks and left me a voicemail from a number I did not recognize. She called me from the County Mental Health Services. Her profession is something entirely different. NOW, that she was possibly having her rock bottom moment. Here she is calling me to be her support when she left me at my worst. I blocked her and moved on. I suggest never get back with an ex who left you. They only comeback when its to their benefit not yours. LIke how steel becomes stronger with fire. That was me. She showed me the type of women she is and I thank her for that. I wish her all the best but leave me alone. She chose her friends/party/freedom and let me know in her way my suffering was not important to her. Sweetie, careful what you wish for. For it may come true. If she left me once, what stops her from doing it again? Did she comeback after possibly the other guy ditched her? Did she finally realize I was the prize? It doesn't matter. I moved on, I was forced to grow without her. If she was not there during my struggle she does not deserve me when I hit success.
It is hard and I've broken my own no contact rule before. But that said, at some point you get to the point you realize that why would you want to be with someone that doesn't want to be with you? You have to have some self-respect. I've learned the really hard way that my definition of love (spending time together, talking, laughing, playing...) is not everyone else's definition of love. I've learned that I have a need to HELP whenever I sense a need and that I get taken advantage of. I've come to realize that I am SICK to DEATH of apologizing for being who I am. Smothering? I just care. Your idea of a good time is laying in your bed and spending hours on FB. I'm wrong for wanting attention and affection? I have to ask you if you love me because it is pulling teeth to get you to say it on your own? Thank you Craig and Margaret for stating the truth that we tend to not want to hear. For saying what I've known in my heart always. Hope always sprang eternal within me. I still love this man but it has to cut both ways. He told me he couldn't give me what I need. I guess he knew what he was talking about. I should have believed and listened. Outcome? No hope left in me whatsoever that there is anyone who is right for me. I'm apparently some weirdo. 60 is too old for belief in fairy tales. And sorry for what devolved into my situation. I did not mean to go there but its only been two days. Going through all the stages. Disbelief, sadness, anger, back to sadness...but I'm ok. Truly.
Autumn Leaves,you deserve better 🙏🙏🙏
First time seeing these guys! They are so great together! OMG, what a different experience & wisdom brings to the table! It's crazy because when I caught my husband talking to an X fiance, I felt like someone broke up with me but I couldnt understand it. Been married 22 yrs. I did all of the things u guys mentioned even though I'm still in the house with our grown kids. He never apologized sincerely but blamed it on me! It's been 7 years and nothing ever got better but only worse. We have no connection what's so ever. About 6 months ago I brought that up, and he basically agreed in a rude, nasty way and then walked away from me. I'm so done. I'm finally making an exit plan cause he will never leave this house. When I threatened to leave (about 3 mo. ago) he told me, and I quote "Go for it!". Apparently I'm a joke now. I stopped chasing him little by little over the last few years. In the last few weeks, I stopped chasing him at all. I dont think I want him anymore, whether or not he changes after he has treated me so worthless for so long.
Did you leave? And how are you doing?
You deserve so much! I wish you the best! You don’t need a man that is coward. He lied and gaslighted you. You don’t deserve that.
@@MM-Iconoclast Were still in the same house. I've been busy working and being with my close friends & family ;) I want to file for divorce very soon. Working on it. I basically ignore him. It's much more easy to do now lol. I even sleep in another room. I love sleeping alone!
I came across that channel after Margaret passed away, but oh my she looked like an amazing woman, truly the grandmother full of wisdom I've never known.
Don't wait for an ex to come back. Live your life and go on dates.
I needed this! You guys give me strength. And the comments on here made me smile. Thank you!
Should've watched this before i delivered her stuff with a handwritten letter today but it's fine, i did what i thought was right for me :)
Ringo van den Heuvel cringe 😬
i dropped her shit off, hugged her, and when she said "bye" all sad... I smirked and said "for now." ... turned away and never looked back. focus on self improvement and you'll get better and she'll eventually regret it lol. you dont actually want her back!
After 2 months of no contact, he reached out to me, but he didn’t feel regret, he didn’t want to make the relationship work. So reaching out does not mean they are into us.
Every word on what you are going through is true.
And it WAS like a faucet had been turned off!
I did do the crying the begging the pleading, the texts. . . . . . Thank goodness i found you both not long after.
The confusion! The anguish! The physical pain. . . . .
At first as a ploy to get my partner back i was inviting him round, texts, making him dinner, asking him to fix things, using our son as an excuse. . .
How can you make someone miss you when you are giving them everything they always had?
I urge you to slow down and follow their advice.
It's hard, unbearably so.
I actually had to lock myself away upstairs last week to stop myself going down and either bleeding all over him or handling things really badly.
I mean, i don't know what's going to happen, but i 100% do believe in the process.
Thanks So so much.
What was the outcome
@@imperialgrind3128 never got back together and healed.
@@cerimassey5218
I’m glad u healed. I did all those mistakes too
In my experience with no contact, I have had 5 out of 6 of my exes come back, I completely disappear, remove them from all social media, the average time has always been about the 3 month mark when they reach out, but others were 6 months, some I've had even 5 years later they are still looking for me, saying they can't forget me. It's disappointing though because usually by then I've moved on and don't wish to have them back.
Can u do a complete video of the Applebee's girl situation? We only get tid-bits of the story LOL
5/6? DAMN. For some reason I can't get myself to remove them from social media though... she ended things saying she isn't ready, im her best friend and she doesnt deserve me, its unfair & that she needs to figure herself out she's too lost & wants to figure herself out (she's avoidant .. im anxious). I've just been staying off of social media, not posting. It makes me wonder if she'll ever come back or not honestly.
@@SR0490 Watch the video by Craig Kenneth, "Meeting Your Ex Where They're At" it's a great one for trying to understand their side of the coin and having empathy of where they are at in their life. And "If I Leave My Ex Alone, Will They Miss Me?" is one of my all-time favorites.
My most recent ex (also my best friend) just ended the relationship over Xmas for the same reason, said he wasn't ready for a relationship, had to figure his life out, etc. as he was younger than me by a lot. This video Meeting Your Ex Where They're At really helped me put things into perspective and have empathy for him and his situation. I'm pretty sure he will come back because I treated him like gold and he will see how the others/next gf won't compare to me. It is unfair, but try not to take the rejection too personally, if it would be personal, he or she would never have started a relationship with you anyway.
I'm anxious too and I had an avoidant ex come back at the 7 month mark but he messed too much with my head and played too many games during the relationship so I did not even answer his texts. Avoidants don't mesh well with anxious. I have always done the no contact rule, and it really works (I'm an experienced no-contacter LOL). And don't check their social media, it only causes you more pain and you start assuming things that are probably not true. I also didn't post anything during NC, this also gives them a chance to wonder about you and they will have to come directly to the source if they want to know about your life.
Up your gym workouts, take new classes at the gym, or try a new hobby, bike rides, take long walks, get a dog, take weekly massages if you can as it boosts the oxytocin in your brain, see friends, I purchased the workbooks The Knowledge to understand relationships better, and I listened to Craig Kenneth every day and night all day long to soothe my anxiety whenever I felt like I was going to break NC and I also did lots of holistic therapy (Reiki, sound healing, biomagnets, etc. to calm me) and I stayed away from any distractions like going to bars, etc. because as an anxious I knew I could be lured into dating a new person, so I just focused all in on myself and healing. 5/6 of my exes did come back, so I can confidently say that there is a good chance your ex will reach out, just give her time and space.
Stay strong, you can do this! Have Discipline or Fail! LOL
@@spacito8617 Ive watched it and rewatch many videos over and over. It is definitely a good one. I am just hoping I'll get a chance to turn things around and implement what im learning and now understand. I guess I'll give her the time to understand. NC is on for legit only 2 weeks. I have a feelings it'll be a long way to go.
@@spacito8617 starting I did begging and pleading and sending memories.... He just ignored me.... And I was calling him daily and texting him so much big big paragraph..... At least for one month.... Ltr he just blocked me... Ltr I started texting him from my friends and family members number.... He just blocked me... And didn't even contact me at all.... It's almost 2 and half month he blocked me everywhere...... He screams to be very happy now.... He is enjoying so much like before.... His shop is very near to my home... He is not even trying to meet me or call me.... He just moved on.... I'm getting scared....
@@spacito8617 now I'm totally bind... I just kept quite from past one month and I saw law of attraction videos and working on that.... He has done my insult.... But to I like him so much..... I'm shocked so much.... He has moved on
It's been 6 months since last contact. I have seen him twice on dating apps & looking great & happy on social media. He is done. I think once a few months go by, it's time to let go & move on.
Hey,
May be I dnt know u, may me I never saw u or talked to you. Bt I want to say everything will be fine and awesome. You are a wonderful person and u deserve a lot of love and respect.❤
All this universe and I m with you . You will be happy
Mine 11 months. Nothing.
I'd genuinely like to hear stories about people who went no contact, was contacted by their ex and then went on to have a long term relationship. Anyone?
I really, really appreciate the both of you. Of all the channels that touch on no contact and letting go, honestly this is the most in-depth, insightful and respective of both the process and turmoil of the breakup
no contact forever 😎👌🏻
9 months of no contact did a world of good. I needed space and time to figure out how to move on in my life. I broke up with my ex and I got the shock of my life when he reached out wanting to sort things out.
Text him on Whapp for any help
7 days here guys. The most beautiful girl in the universe. Trying to gather the pieces of my broken heart. This videos help a lot to get through this
If she doesn't come back, I have ZERO desire to ever do this again. I'm done with dating.
Every time I feel like contacting my ex..I watch these videos😊 and I then drop the idea of reaching out. These videos give me inspiration to stick to NC. 😊
Thank you Craig and Margaret for these amazing videos. I learned many things from your videos that changed my life and put me on a positive path. 😊🙏🏼😊🙏🏼 your help is greatly appreciated.
You’re welcome! Share us with friends and family ❤️
I cry so hard, nearly everyday. I can’t mend. Thanks for the comforting words. My ex had reached out within one week but had an ultimatum, I declined that because it was not what we had agreed upon originally at beginning of relationship and it’s something I’d prefer to conclude in my own mind, not being persuaded by others. Now I see things tiny bit different but he won’t even talk to me or call me back after totally devaluing my ENTIRE EXISTENCE.
You value you. His opinion doesn't matter. Stay strong.
I am focusing on myself, and I have improved so much. Hopefully my ex decides to try us once more. I know she will be floored by the improvements I have made.
I tried to move on from a partner who betrayed me for 6 months before dumping me in the cold way described here. She had plenty of time to try out her new man and I didn’t stand a chance. That was nearly 40 years ago and I’ve suffered trauma ever since. Life can deal some of us a cruel hand and that’s all there is to it.
Thats horrible. My prayers are with you. Stay strong
Prayers don’t do any good. Therapy may, I hope.
Sorry, didn’t mean to sound like I don’t appreciate your sympathy. I’m just not a believer.
14 days of NC and he sent me a text today. Even if it is small talk it's something. Yayyyy 😊
omg im so happy for you, currently 2days of NC. I hope it happens for me soon
I won't hear I'm sure.. even if it is decades.. I fell in love a daddy's boy
They will be loosing their "SELF-RESPECT" or "INTEGRITY" if they reach back again.😪😪😪
I couldnt thank you more than enough. You were my comfort thru the crazy storms. I was always told or knew that no contact rule should last for atleast 30 days regardless if the ex contacted me that i should just ignore it. You are the first coach i listened to that opposed that idea. While i was on my 1st week of NCR, my housemaid told me that my ex has been communicating with her and that he intends to talk to me tomorrow (after how many harassing messages he sent me also for many days), i was so anxious to break the NCR and this gave me so much hope that yes, you will break the NCR if they want to reach out to you. And this time, on the 8th day of NCR, I was surprised- instead of receiving his harrassing messages as i am accustomed to them, i recieved a formal CAN WE TALK? I WANT TO TALK TO YOU NICELY AND TALK ABOUT THINGS PROPERLY. I immediately gave him a thumbs up and he called right away. I was surprised that he talked to me in a dignified and in a more respectful tone. I was used to his harassment, verbal abuse and screaming- but this time, he was different. And we took the time to reconcile things, and now we are happy and contented with taking things slow. Thanks coach. You saved my life. I was very determined to ignore this ex till 30 days. And i saw this before it happened.
Wow - he was harassing you and you gave him another chance? Are you together?
@@MM-Iconoclast right now we no longer are together. No matter how desperate and foolish i was, this vid worked. But now i no longer tolerate his ass. I hate him. He still wants to keep in touch but i got tired.
@@epicplayz853 So glad you moved on! And did so from a position of power and self-care. Thanks for sharing the update.
@@MM-Iconoclast thank you for asking. :) i was reminded how blessed i was after those tough times that i had to go through. :)
@@epicplayz853 Good for you - better and stronger!!
NC works. While watching this video now. My Ex reaches out asking me while I’m not calling her.
Lol. Rich of them.
After how long your ex reached out?
Much Thanks Craig Kenneth and Margaret (RIP) for such an informative and detailed video!
Happy Blessed Christmas!
🙏💕😇
Wow, you answered what exactly I was wondering. Their birthday is coming up and I'm a huge fan of birthdays. I will not be reaching out.
How did it go?
My situation is tragic. My boyfriend broke up with me because of threats from his adult children.
We had a very nice, easy going relationship and loved each other.
Your videos help me understand what’s happening and what to do next.
Everyone is just telling me to accept that it's completely over. I can't even handle daily life tasks. I miss him so much. I don't want to accept that it's over. I'm a very anxious and my ex is avoident. I doubt he'll regret his decision.
Feel.the same with my girl now..anxious n void...no where to go n.hide
I hope you both find the strength to make it through. My three-year relationship just ended a few weeks ago so I’m right there in the same boat with you guys. We can do this be strong.
Me too. Im anxious he avoidance. Been 11 months no contact. Nothing at all. Im sad
Any update
Me too, any updates?
Been long doing a lot of work on myself, so I stayed away from he channel for the time as I have to let a lot of information sink in. And now that I'm back, I still love how you're working together. Craig you're handsome 🥰🥰
Margaret you look so great!!!