The Man in the Arena “If he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat. -Theodore Roosevelt
There is also a HUGE cultural component. ""Real" jobs are demanded of children in most Asian cultures, for instance. Sometimes, the struggling artist is fighting more than just random specific criticism and is faced with the daunting task of shifting their entire culture's paradigm. That is the primary reason I didn't start writing until retirement - now, it's OK for me to do something so "self-indulgent.'
That’s absolutely true, and it’s not even about earning money or building a stable life-it’s about the superficial prestige associated with certain jobs. I’m Turkish and studied performing arts. Throughout my education and career, both as a performer and a writer, I’ve been constantly bombarded with degrading criticism and alienation from every single member of my family. Now, in my early 30s, I earn more money and have a more stable life than both of my cousins-one is a civil engineer, and the other works as a government employee. Yet, despite this, I’m still seen as the rebellious, irresponsible failure child of the family.
@@lunafencoven My heart goes out to you. As Dale Carnegie said, "A man convinced against his will is of the same opinion still." Sounds like your family is too stubborn to admit you were right.
@@lunafencoven It's a case of "A man convinced against his will is of the same opinion still," Dale Carnegie. You'll never convince them, so love them and realize that they are doing their best to love you back (however feeble that "best" is).
It can be so easy to compare yourself to other authors. Especially unpublished writers who have no clue if people will actually love their book. What I tell myself when people are negative, is: "I will just write my book so good, that I will prove them wrong." You guys are so inspiring! Another great video! So helpful❤
Before I was just about to start crying because I was feeling very discouraged about my writing and skill, then I went to TH-cam to distract myself when I saw that you aploaded this episode 8 minutes ago (at that time) and it has help me so much! Now I feel fine again and ready to continue working on my story! Keep doing what you are doing, you two are truly wonderful!
I felt like giving up on multiple things I like. I felt like I was overwhelmed by burnout in dance to the point I would leave it, I felt heavy, tired and half asleep in a greenhouse while removing weeds even though I usually like doing that (pretty bad since farming is my main driving passion), it also happened in writing when I felt overwhelmed by the many contradictions my projects had. But everytime I felt this way, I told myself, "Remember why you're here." Remember why you are in this place in your journey, that despite you looking at videos of you dancing you didn't think you looked as cool as you imagined but people admired them, for they wouldn't be able to do all that. That you can feed people, or that those plants are gonna get stronger and carry more fruit if you remove all those weeds. That those stories are really cool and feel like they are already developing themselves while you're reading them. And it's ok to detach a little bit if approaching the activity feels like pain or discomfort, it will feel better soon. Maybe I watch other people competing and remember why this hypes me so much. I research on colleagues on TH-cam to see their progress in farms or if they have interesting new techniques they apply. Or I take a look at your videos so I can have new ideas on how to develop some characters and overcome this fear, understanding why my projects matter.
I actually had this happen to me another student back when I was still in high school found out about an idea of a book that I was thinking about writting. She took it and started to read it to the whole class then she looked at me said, "this is trash" and slammed it down in front of me on my desk. My father was the same way. Now I am engaged and have two beautiful children, right now I am actually working on a historical fiction/romance novel and my fiancé is my rock and I always bounce ideas off of him too. He always tells me,"This is your book. Make it how you like it. Too many ideas from other people could change the story altogether." Oh and he also reads the chapters too, to see if he could follow what is going on in the story without me saying anything.
I am 11 years old and not many people take my writing seriously and judge it without even reading it, this video encouraged me a lot. Thank you so much, Kate and Abbie! P. S. I love the Blood Race trilogy as well as 100 Days of Sunlight!
just had my writing absolutely roasted by my writing group. needed this. cosmically good timing to upload this video, so thank you ❤️❤️❤️ I love you guys ❤️❤️❤️
I might either continue to write or try drawing again or move on to something else because lately I've been trying to find something to unleash my creative spark. I really appreciate this video because this subject needs to be talked about because I've had that happen to me in 2017 with another artist and honestly it has messed with my head for two years. Anyway thanks for helping me and others on this. (I wanted to edit this because you know grammar 🤣)
My family's favourite word when I was growing up was, "pipedream." When I was 14 or 15 they even had me in a family meeting because I didn't want to be a secretary. I'm writing in secret now. Thank you for your pointers, your playlists and advice, and I am investing in Scrivener 3 on hearing your recommendations because you actually do know what you're talking about. Why I've spent 40 years listening to people who are not on my level is beyond me, but that negativity can break you if you're not careful. 1000 thank yous to both. xx
I had finished my outline 2 days ago, took a day off to come back today with a fresh set of eyes, and I am now beginning my 1st draft. Thank you so much Abbie for your guidance via TH-cam and thank you to your sister for this pod ep. and these word of wisdom!
Thank you so much for this amazingly inspiring episode! This is so full of good vibes and strengh! When I was studying marine biology, I use to have a lot of people telling me not to do what I was doing because there were only one or two people succeeding per year in this studying field, and I always thougt « well, these 2 people believed in it, so I can be one of these 2 », and in fact, I currently am one of these 2! And now I’m a 36 year-old, mum of 2, who started to write 2 years ago, and I still think that we can make it if we believe we can, no matter what. We all have our own experience to bring to this world. Thank you so much again! (and sorry if I made mistakes, I’m French by the way).
This reminded me of an old episode of Extra Credits, and the idea of "fail faster". That channel is about game development, but I'd say it's a great thing for writers to watch too. The episode title is "Fail Faster - A Mantra for Creative Thinkers - Extra Credits", and it's on TH-cam. (The video's about 4 and a half minutes, so it's not too long.) The idea of failing faster is quite something, because it acts against the concept of the "perfect idea". If you just start, it won't be perfect, but it will be something. Something that's a mess, but now you have something to work with, to reform, to add to. Multiple iterations, even though the material starts out not great is what can produce great stuff. I love that idea.
I’m beginning to think I take so long to write daily because I’m not only afraid of being interrupted and stressed but I’m also afraid people won’t like what I write. Thank you for the new perception.
This episode has been helpful through my emotional roller coasters. My friends have also find this podcast helpful. You girls are truly blessing to have on this earth. I’m praying for you. 🙏🏾
This is really one of the best videos I’ve ever watched. Everything you girls say rings so true and it really is uplifting. I’m now more encouraged than ever to continue on my writing journey, thank you.
"You're also going to encounter not encouraging people." As a male, this is an understatement. Male coworkers are incredibly mean to their male coworkers. For every 3 supportive people there are in a man's life, there is one rogue coworker who destroys any dreams in one fell swoop. I find American men to be narcissistic, egotistical, and without empathy and kindness. Being in the presence of these people is a form of abuse, and it causes lasting trauma. (I've rarely ever encountered a female coworker who carries these negative attributes.) Just last week, a superintendent (the General) at a commercial job site I was working at, he kicked off an entire crew of people contracted to work on the construction site. The General's constant complaining resulted in the workers lashing out. Eventually it escalated until the General terminated an entire crew of 10 guys from the job site. This is normal stuff for men, but it would never happen if a woman was running the construction site.
Literally yesterday i was plotting my book and felt like I couldnt do it because its my first book and that i dont have the skills to write something like that and now I see this 🥺
My mother has made it clear that she doesn't think i can make it as an author. My dad is different but he doesn't seem to care too much... My friends don't seem to care at all.
I use to be in the same situation. Mainly with friendship. 2 years ago I had to learn how let go of “friends” that only wanted to harm me. And to this day I’m still learning on how to forgive/handle bullies. So at that point and so on really had to study my people.
No one in my family are writers so I have no one to talk to about it for support and all my friends are in college and I’m not but they didn’t understand either
Please help😭: I'm a Webnovel writer, and my novel is currently around 80,000-words. With the criticism I got, I came to know that I have committed many mistakes along the way... And I had fixed some of them (the major ones). But now, I am discouraged and on the verge of giving up because of the fear of making more mistakes again! 😭 The criticism just reminds me how dumb I am! 😭 Please, someone help! 🙏
Could you imagine telling a baby they're dumb for falling when they learn to walk? You are allowed to make mistakes, just get back into it and keep learning.
If you zoom in their eyes you can see the similarities, ex. in their intro. Plus Kate is a bit older than Abbie and its normal to not look so similar. Also, Abbie with her short brown hair looks more similar to Kate than her current hair. 💛
The Man in the Arena
“If he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.
-Theodore Roosevelt
I always think of Brene Brown now when I see this quote. Powerful!
There is also a HUGE cultural component. ""Real" jobs are demanded of children in most Asian cultures, for instance. Sometimes, the struggling artist is fighting more than just random specific criticism and is faced with the daunting task of shifting their entire culture's paradigm. That is the primary reason I didn't start writing until retirement - now, it's OK for me to do something so "self-indulgent.'
That’s absolutely true, and it’s not even about earning money or building a stable life-it’s about the superficial prestige associated with certain jobs. I’m Turkish and studied performing arts. Throughout my education and career, both as a performer and a writer, I’ve been constantly bombarded with degrading criticism and alienation from every single member of my family.
Now, in my early 30s, I earn more money and have a more stable life than both of my cousins-one is a civil engineer, and the other works as a government employee. Yet, despite this, I’m still seen as the rebellious, irresponsible failure child of the family.
@@lunafencoven My heart goes out to you. As Dale Carnegie said, "A man convinced against his will is of the same opinion still." Sounds like your family is too stubborn to admit you were right.
@@lunafencoven It's a case of "A man convinced against his will is of the same opinion still," Dale Carnegie. You'll never convince them, so love them and realize that they are doing their best to love you back (however feeble that "best" is).
I don’t how to describe it but, my self-confidence meter went from cold coal to exploding Star after watching this video.
We're so glad to hear that!!! 💛
K.A. Emmons Thnx you guys are awesome! I just shared this video like crazy as soon as I finished listening it.
It can be so easy to compare yourself to other authors. Especially unpublished writers who have no clue if people will actually love their book. What I tell myself when people are negative, is: "I will just write my book so good, that I will prove them wrong." You guys are so inspiring! Another great video! So helpful❤
Before I was just about to start crying because I was feeling very discouraged about my writing and skill, then I went to TH-cam to distract myself when I saw that you aploaded this episode 8 minutes ago (at that time) and it has help me so much!
Now I feel fine again and ready to continue working on my story!
Keep doing what you are doing, you two are truly wonderful!
This makes us so happy 💛Thanks so much for being here. We're so glad this episode could encourage you
I’m so glad to hear that you are doing better. I hope that you’re writing dreams will be fulfilled. ❤️
I felt like giving up on multiple things I like. I felt like I was overwhelmed by burnout in dance to the point I would leave it, I felt heavy, tired and half asleep in a greenhouse while removing weeds even though I usually like doing that (pretty bad since farming is my main driving passion), it also happened in writing when I felt overwhelmed by the many contradictions my projects had.
But everytime I felt this way, I told myself,
"Remember why you're here."
Remember why you are in this place in your journey, that despite you looking at videos of you dancing you didn't think you looked as cool as you imagined but people admired them, for they wouldn't be able to do all that.
That you can feed people, or that those plants are gonna get stronger and carry more fruit if you remove all those weeds. That those stories are really cool and feel like they are already developing themselves while you're reading them.
And it's ok to detach a little bit if approaching the activity feels like pain or discomfort, it will feel better soon.
Maybe I watch other people competing and remember why this hypes me so much. I research on colleagues on TH-cam to see their progress in farms or if they have interesting new techniques they apply. Or I take a look at your videos so I can have new ideas on how to develop some characters and overcome this fear, understanding why my projects matter.
Their genuine positivity is such a beautiful and needed thing. So thankful for these two 💜
I actually had this happen to me another student back when I was still in high school found out about an idea of a book that I was thinking about writting. She took it and started to read it to the whole class then she looked at me said, "this is trash" and slammed it down in front of me on my desk. My father was the same way.
Now I am engaged and have two beautiful children, right now I am actually working on a historical fiction/romance novel and my fiancé is my rock and I always bounce ideas off of him too. He always tells me,"This is your book. Make it how you like it. Too many ideas from other people could change the story altogether." Oh and he also reads the chapters too, to see if he could follow what is going on in the story without me saying anything.
that's sooo wholesome and sweet 💓💓💓
I am 11 years old and not many people take my writing seriously and judge it without even reading it, this video encouraged me a lot. Thank you so much, Kate and Abbie!
P. S. I love the Blood Race trilogy as well as 100 Days of Sunlight!
just had my writing absolutely roasted by my writing group. needed this. cosmically good timing to upload this video, so thank you ❤️❤️❤️ I love you guys ❤️❤️❤️
We are so thrilled this episode could encourage you! 💛
@@KAEmmons it really did, thank u
I love that quote on "Revenge" its BEAUTIFUL!!!!
I love it too!!
You get, “Defend your choices.”
I might either continue to write or try drawing again or move on to something else because lately I've been trying to find something to unleash my creative spark. I really appreciate this video because this subject needs to be talked about because I've had that happen to me in 2017 with another artist and honestly it has messed with my head for two years. Anyway thanks for helping me and others on this. (I wanted to edit this because you know grammar 🤣)
My family's favourite word when I was growing up was, "pipedream." When I was 14 or 15 they even had me in a family meeting because I didn't want to be a secretary. I'm writing in secret now. Thank you for your pointers, your playlists and advice, and I am investing in Scrivener 3 on hearing your recommendations because you actually do know what you're talking about. Why I've spent 40 years listening to people who are not on my level is beyond me, but that negativity can break you if you're not careful. 1000 thank yous to both. xx
I had finished my outline 2 days ago, took a day off to come back today with a fresh set of eyes, and I am now beginning my 1st draft. Thank you so much Abbie for your guidance via TH-cam and thank you to your sister for this pod ep. and these word of wisdom!
This is my new podcast episode if I ever get discouraged again, thank you so much
Thank you so much for this amazingly inspiring episode! This is so full of good vibes and strengh! When I was studying marine biology, I use to have a lot of people telling me not to do what I was doing because there were only one or two people succeeding per year in this studying field, and I always thougt « well, these 2 people believed in it, so I can be one of these 2 », and in fact, I currently am one of these 2! And now I’m a 36 year-old, mum of 2, who started to write 2 years ago, and I still think that we can make it if we believe we can, no matter what. We all have our own experience to bring to this world. Thank you so much again! (and sorry if I made mistakes, I’m French by the way).
Awesome podcast episode and message - love it. 😀💖
This is the thing I was needing to listen
Loved it tqq for information 🙂
I am 12 and I am going to publish my book soon , your an Inspiration for this generation 👍
This is INCREDIBLE advice, not just for writing but for life in general. Great job, ladies!
This reminded me of an old episode of Extra Credits, and the idea of "fail faster". That channel is about game development, but I'd say it's a great thing for writers to watch too. The episode title is "Fail Faster - A Mantra for Creative Thinkers - Extra Credits", and it's on TH-cam. (The video's about 4 and a half minutes, so it's not too long.)
The idea of failing faster is quite something, because it acts against the concept of the "perfect idea". If you just start, it won't be perfect, but it will be something. Something that's a mess, but now you have something to work with, to reform, to add to. Multiple iterations, even though the material starts out not great is what can produce great stuff. I love that idea.
I’m beginning to think I take so long to write daily because I’m not only afraid of being interrupted and stressed but I’m also afraid people won’t like what I write. Thank you for the new perception.
I really needed to listen to this. Thank you, Kate and Abbie! You are awesome.
You inspired me. I felt all the things you said, and this isn't even my first language. keep doing this great job together
This episode has been helpful through my emotional roller coasters. My friends have also find this podcast helpful. You girls are truly blessing to have on this earth. I’m praying for you. 🙏🏾
We are so thrilled to hear that, Kennedy! Thank you so much for being here 💛🙏
@@KAEmmons 😉
This is really one of the best videos I’ve ever watched. Everything you girls say rings so true and it really is uplifting. I’m now more encouraged than ever to continue on my writing journey, thank you.
Thank you so much!! We are so thrilled to hear that this encouraged you 💛🙏
Why did you make this video I was just about to delete my book 🙈. Now I can’t
Another awesome episode! Thanks so much for it :)
I already knew all of this!....Thank you, I needed the reminder.
Same here.
This was really helpful thanks, I just started writing and have been feeling a lot of these things
Thanks for this! So important!
Love the intro!!!!
Thanks again...very inspirational, even to a very late starter like me,🌹🌹
I like how you said to stay on mission.
"You're also going to encounter not encouraging people." As a male, this is an understatement. Male coworkers are incredibly mean to their male coworkers. For every 3 supportive people there are in a man's life, there is one rogue coworker who destroys any dreams in one fell swoop.
I find American men to be narcissistic, egotistical, and without empathy and kindness. Being in the presence of these people is a form of abuse, and it causes lasting trauma. (I've rarely ever encountered a female coworker who carries these negative attributes.)
Just last week, a superintendent (the General) at a commercial job site I was working at, he kicked off an entire crew of people contracted to work on the construction site. The General's constant complaining resulted in the workers lashing out. Eventually it escalated until the General terminated an entire crew of 10 guys from the job site. This is normal stuff for men, but it would never happen if a woman was running the construction site.
Literally yesterday i was plotting my book and felt like I couldnt do it because its my first book and that i dont have the skills to write something like that and now I see this 🥺
This one has blew a lot of confidence into me thank you so much ❤️, the vibes 💫
Thank you both for sharing and inspiring. This is so helpful.
You guys are my friends. 😊
❤️
8k views!! Yay!!
My mother has made it clear that she doesn't think i can make it as an author. My dad is different but he doesn't seem to care too much... My friends don't seem to care at all.
I use to be in the same situation. Mainly with friendship. 2 years ago I had to learn how let go of “friends” that only wanted to harm me. And to this day I’m still learning on how to forgive/handle bullies. So at that point and so on really had to study my people.
inspiring as hell
Thanks you!
I’m deeply sorry for the hurt that I’ve caused. I’ll do everything I can to make up for it.
No one in my family are writers so I have no one to talk to about it for support and all my friends are in college and I’m not but they didn’t understand either
maybe join abbie's facebook writing group for support and advice 💓
Could you please upload a video on marketing?
Goal: believe in yourself
Obstacle: low self-esteem
this is great 🥰
It's ironically hard how there could be several people who believe in me but I'm the only one who doesn't...
It’s getting better. Don’t worry. Also, real gods might exist. Check and see if you can negotiate.
Please help😭:
I'm a Webnovel writer, and my novel is currently around 80,000-words. With the criticism I got, I came to know that I have committed many mistakes along the way... And I had fixed some of them (the major ones).
But now, I am discouraged and on the verge of giving up because of the fear of making more mistakes again! 😭
The criticism just reminds me how dumb I am! 😭
Please, someone help! 🙏
Could you imagine telling a baby they're dumb for falling when they learn to walk? You are allowed to make mistakes, just get back into it and keep learning.
Are you guys really sisters?? You look so different, though. I'm sorry if I'm being rude.. just curious..
Are you saying they sound more mature? I’m starting notice this too.
Yeah..
If you zoom in their eyes you can see the similarities, ex. in their intro. Plus Kate is a bit older than Abbie and its normal to not look so similar. Also, Abbie with her short brown hair looks more similar to Kate than her current hair. 💛
@@annejia5382 thank you ❤️
Your videos are long a little too much
But that was helpful you know
Cause this was from their podcast which is usually longer than their youtube videos.
Bad as hell