How to Stop Caring What People Think of You
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 30 เม.ย. 2019
- How to stop caring about what people think of you - my thoughts on how to stop people pleasing, living for others, and being afraid of judgment, criticisms, etc. and how to start living your best life for yourself.
Happy 5th birthday to Lavendaire! I thought I'd take this opportunity to reflect on the first video I posted on this channel and share what I've learned over the past 5 years. 😸 Thank you for sticking with me over the years! I'm so grateful for you & this beautiful community ✨ My life has completely transformed these past 5 years - I'm so lucky to be able to experience this and share it with all of you. I can't wait to see where the next 5 years takes us!
Now I'd love to hear: what's your favorite Lavendaire video?
// watch these throwback lavendaire videos
→ How to Stop Caring About What Others Think of You | bit.ly/2u9j58d
→ Introducing Lavendaire | bit.ly/2H2eYmN
→ Lavendaire's first blog post | www.lavendaire.com/welcome-la...
// more videos you might like
→ How to Be Confident | bit.ly/2SX6Fep
→ How to Deal with Self Criticism | bit.ly/2u4EKOx
→ Authenticity: PSA for People Pleasers & Empaths | bit.ly/301Ldw0
→ How to Set Boundaries & Stop People Pleasing | bit.ly/3ca4xdo
#selfhelp #selflove
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Edited by Loryn Teranishi | @yoloryn
Music by Epidemic Sound - bit.ly/2IBCok1 (30 day free trial)
Outro music by Eventide | bit.ly/2wW9Xa8
// M A I L B O X
Aileen Xu
PO Box 296
Brea, CA 92822
Business inquiries | lavendaire@select.co
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// A B O U T
I’m Aileen, a lifestyle blogger sharing knowledge and inspiration on creating your dream life.
Lavendaire is my blog about personal growth + lifestyle design. Follow along and learn how you can create a life you love.
Subscribe to Lavendaire to get inspired by new videos weekly! bit.ly/sublavendaire
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Disclaimer: This is NOT a sponsored video. - แนวปฏิบัติและการใช้ชีวิต
✨ Plan your most intentional & successful year with the 2024 Artist of Life Workbook, a powerful guided journal for achieving your dream life → lavendaire.com/workbook
I always think of this when I worry about what others think.
"Those who matter don't mind,
Those who mind don't matter."
This is so powerful ❤️
That is so great ☺️❤️❤️thank you 😘
What you said was so inspirational and true , thanks
So powerful
I’m going to use this thank you
this woman is my hero, I love her so much
Manuela Gonçalves ❤️❤️
Me too
I promise you!!
Me too
Yes 💗
Happy 5th birthday to Lavendaire! 😸 Thanks for all your support over the years! I'm so grateful for you & this beautiful community ✨ My life has completely transformed these past 5 years - I'm so lucky to be able to experience this and share it with all of you. I can't wait to see where the next 5 years takes us!
Now I'd love to hear: what's your favorite Lavendaire video?
Side note: After I filmed this video I wanted to screenshot examples of negative comments but I noticed that when intentionally searching for those comments, I had to scroll so much through so many positive and kind comments that the negative ones were hard to find lol. The reality is, I get so many more positive comments than negative/criticizing ones, but our brains tend to focus on the negative & blow it out of proportion because it affect us more. Just a friendly reminder to focus on the good and what's going right in your life vs. the negative :) Love you!!
Love ya also 😉💖👍
Hey Aileen,you are super awesome n Happy Birthday to Lavendaire 🎊🎊🎊.My favorite videoes are-Habits of successful people,Favourite books,Dream life series videoes,New year goal and theme,How to make more money,Journaling videoes,How to live your best life,How to create Habits.💕💕
Love all of your videos keep going you are amazing such an inspiration for all of us .
Love from India😀
Hi miss Lavendaire!I just want you to know that I LOVE ALL OF YOUR VIDEOS but so far,I like the how to build a habit that sticks vide.It is just so HELPFULL TO ME😊THANK YOU FOR A 5 YEARS OF GIVING AS A WONDERFUL CONTENT😊❣Love you all the way to Philippines😘🤗
Congratulations Aileen 🎉🎊
"Strive for progress, not perfection" instantly takes such a load off my shoulders 🙏
So true 🤩
*Who else is so inspired by her??*
- _from a small TH-camr_
MEEE!!!!
very much
Same sis
me
Always
“Progress, not perfection... respect each other’s journey” 😭🙏🏼👍🏼 I really needed this. Thanks Aileen for recapping and redoing this video , and happy 5th birthday, Lavendaire 💜💕✨
SweetAsElle yes! Thank youu
This helped so much. My parents are constantly telling me everything I do wrong, but now that I don't care about they're critisizm, I am much happier.
Another thing I try to remind myself of when someone is being unreasonable: “Whose opinion of me do I respect more: my own, or a complete stranger’s?” You will always have more context on your situation than the person commenting.
"You are good enough" :)
Thank you!!!!!! Such positivity your amazing!!!!stay true to who you are!!!!!!
People who let go of worries instead of stressing over them are much healthier than those who don’t. When you pay great attention to what other people could be thinking of you, you cause anxiety, stress, and misery. Remember the only person that can hurt your feelings is you. Many of us spend too much time and energy worrying about what other people think. And if you worry so much about what other people think of you, you will always keep changing according to their opinions and you will no longer be yourself. Thanks for your share, Love you so much Lavendaire ;)
Lessons In Life so true!
Listen learn great advice 👍👍👍thank you im working on this
True👍thank you
Truth
i've been suffering like this for the past few years, i really don't know how to go back to my true self cuz like u said, i change accordingly to their opinions,.. feels like i'm never gonna go back again
Yesssssss 🙌🏻
Krist Soup 😘
This made me realize something that I had never even thought about before...I feel like my whole life I've equated my academic performance to my self-worth. This connects to how I also put what my parents thought of me, and wanted from me, above everything else in my life- including what I wanted from myself. I'm partially grateful that I had that push to do well in school (because it got me where I am today, in college on scholarship), but now that I'm here and looking to my future and what I want the rest of my life to be like, I need to reflect on how much of that "push" has also been "pushing out" things that I want to bring into my life.
Amazing breakthrough. I & I’m sure a lot of ppl here can totally relate 💕
In my sophomore year with a full ride after grinding in high school and don't know what to do with my life. I feel this
You are much more than your academic performance. There is so much more to life than that. In fact, the real learning starts after college.
I watched this video almost a year ago and left this comment saying what I learned from it. Just now the same video was on my home page, and I clicked on it because there are new challenges surfacing in my life now that are different from the ones I was facing the first time I watched it. How crazy that this video said exactly what I needed to hear the second time around too, but for totally different reasons!
wise words
"It only matters what you think of yourself." - I can see how much confidence that has grown in you and even your voice has changed over the years! Happy fifth anniversary aileen! 💗
lavendaire was (and will always be) the guidance that the universe sent me. i'm grateful for discovering her. my life has never been more enlightened and inspired!! :D
Vietnamese, Japanese & Spanish subtitles are available! Click "CC" and check the video settings. Thank you to the contributors listed in the description 💕
your videos have CHANGED me. I have been following you for years and I remember just sitting down in my room and watching all your inspiring videos on how to stay focused, create positive habits and follow your dreams. Because of you, I was able to go into college with confidence and stay focused on my career and even start doing youtube too! Thank you so much Lavendaire, Happy 5th Birthday! 💜💜🍃
That’s amazing!! ❤️✨
Why would someone leave a mean comment for you? Hard to imagine.
i completely agree that when you truly love to learn yourself and you realize you are good enough that life just gets better because you stop looking outside yourself for validation and whats more empowering than that!
What made sense to me the most here was "people are gonna continue judging you anyways" and they see life in their own filter. Thanks Aileen. I too like your video on emotional wound healing, that, I mean, I need it to move forward.
You've just saved my day. :)
I got married last month, and it was the happiest day of my life, because I married my true love and my best friend. :) The wedding was absolutely amazing, even better than I could possibly imagine, I felt like a Disney princess the whole day.
A couple of days after the wedding I talked to my bridesmaid, the only bridesmaid I had... And all she had to say is just the negative stuff about my family, my husband's family, the food, the music... Well, she did like my look and the wedding cake, but that's all.
I don't know why she said that, but it hurts so bad I couldn't stop thinking about it up until now. My mind just would filter out all positive things that other guests said: that it was the most beautiful wedding that they've ever seen, that the food was delicious, that the ceremony was so emotional the barely could hide their tears.
I guess I've chosen the wrong person to be a bridesmaid.
May be she was a bit jealous...
Sometimes our happiness and sucess can trigger other people... nothing personal with us... it is stuff in them that needs healing! Congratulations on creating a great wedding and event sistah 🤗☀️
Congratulations ❤️😘😘😘 I wish you a life full of love, hapiness, success and everything you've ever dreamt of .
Sounds like a little bit of hate. Your happy and she is projecting
She is a hater! It is Soo sad when your friend I'm assuming is trying to bring you down , she sounds toxic get rid of her.
Congratulations with the 5th anniversary! I love Lovendaire! You're such a hard worker and such an inspiration and a role model for me!
i'd say for all of us here
T I A N A thank you dear!! ❤️
I love the quote: "There are only two people in the world you need to impress: your 5-year-old self and your 80-year-old self." 🍀🍀🍀🍀
You changed my thoughts and my life with your good content and also my outlook on life. Thank you so much.
This is my first time hearing what I wanted to be told by a beautiful stranger (lavendaire😉) rather than my close ones.
Strive for progress not for perfection- totally for me cz I feel like till now what I have done and what I m doing might be to make someone else happy or be content with me but if I still look in the mirror and ask myself what I want to do for myself, I just don't know cz I guess all those years it was never for me.
Thanks a lot u know, it really helped💜
Perfect timing! I've been so much under pressure with thoughts about my future and what am I supposed to do with my life and compared myself with "successful" people so often that I started to feel down on a daily basis.
Congrats💞
Oh you will feel much better soon, don't worry! 🤗 Even better than comparing yourself with others is finding inspiration in their work and their 'success'. Picture who >you< want to be and just start! You can do it!! 😊
i have been feeling the same way
@@jasonbristow oh, thank you! It's hard, but I'll try😄
The sunniest person on TH-cam! ☀️ With love from Ukraine! ❤️
It is known.
hello from Ukraine to you too 😋
ooo this is a bit unrelated but ukraine’s eurovision was awesome
“You can still love yourself and want to be better.” I love that!!!!
I didn‘t realize how much I needed to hear this until I started tearing up...THANK YOU!!
Aileen has changed me so much since I started watching Lavendaire. This channel plays a very important in changing me and my life in a very positive way. I am so happy that *LAVENDAIRE* is still going strong and prospering after 5 years. More good years to come.!!! Congratulations, Aileen!!!
❤️❤️ thank you!!
Congratulations! I started watching your videos when I was living with my parents, in a really bad relationship, and just generally miserable with life. I am now a full time musician with a two bedroom apartment, wonderful partner, get along better with my parents and love my life, and a lot of that has to do with your consistent outpouring of positivity and encouragement! Thanks for making the internet a better place
I love ppl who r honest like u
whenever i feel down, aileen always seems to make me feel a worth. true inspiration and motivation comes from aileen's heart 💘
5 years already! Wow!! 🤯 I still remember the first Lavendaire video I watched and how it inspired me from the jump: the 'Artist of Life' video. It's still my favourite and embodies everything I aspire for. I'm so grateful for the wisdoms taught on this channel and in the podcast. Lavendaire is my favourite TH-cam channel, and I hope it grows even more in quality and reach in the years to come 💜
yes Issy, I remember you from the early days!! Thanks for being here. Really appreciate it 💜
Girl!You saved me many times whenever I feel down and lost myself. Your videos make me clear to see myself new version of me. Even though I rarely do comments on your videos I've been a favorite fan of yours over 3 years. Thank you so so much. 🖤🖤
I was reminded of how I stumbled upon your yt channel. I was struggling with so many personal issues in myself that time. It was a rough times for me. You have been like one of the positive people I've met in the internet and I am so glad I happen to stumble to your channel. You are truly sent from heaven. Thank you Aileen and more power to you. 💛
The Dream Life Series was EVERYTHING for me! Love you so much, congrats & happy birthday Lavendaire! 🎶💜💘
So well put Aileen! Huge congratulations on staying strong for 5 years and making Lavendaire as successful as it is. I think this was a great topic to cover as a milestone as it is so important in bringing more love and light to the world.
I'm rewatching this video after a long time, and it's still one of my favorite ones. I can relate to almost every insights. It's always so soothing and peaceful to hear you talk about these stuffs. Keep going. I love you Aileen ❤️
you really make me feel better. whenever im feeling down i just open your channel and randomly choose one of your videos. you always make me feel good. so thankful for that
I love how she compared to her older self and told her old me and people like her some advice on her thoughts. You're amazing Aileen xx
Omg I'm so proud of you! 5 years! That's amazing. I love your channel and all the content you post. You always motivate and inspire me and you can always cheer me up and make me feel more at peace so thank you so much for this
Happy 5th year Aileen! You are amazing for inspiring us to believe in ourselves and chase our dreams and make it happen. ❤️
You have no idea how much i needed this
I love how you talk from experience and not just repeating something you read. This really help me. Thank you again. I feel relieved
Girl you have no idea how helpful your vedios are for me, thankyou so much.....
I deleted friends and family and enemies off my phone I had to start again after 47 self love and balance my money bills and fresh start with myself and relaxation and meditation spiritual awakening journey 🙏💞 justice lots of love from London my husband Lawrence and beautiful son Simon and respect myself and just not judge and be happy and healthy and active and passionate no more tarot cards reading thank you so much for your time and advice 💞
Happy 5th birthday on not caring of what people think you should be! This is such a strong message, thank you for saying this, Aileen. Much love, and congratulations!
Happy 5 years! I’m so proud of you and thankful that you chose to create this channel. I’m also grateful that I get to be here to view your content. Sending you all of the love and light ❤️✨
Hbday Lavendaire!
I really love this message of self-love. You're so inspiring. Thank you for being yourself, you are a star
Happy birthday Lavendaire❤️
Thank you for all these inspiring videos that bring me joy.☺️
Lavendaire really changed my life!🥰
Happy Birthday Lavendaire ! I can't remember how I found your channel (surely hopping from organisation/minimalist/tidying up videos) but I remember subscribing because of the beautiful music, background, and also your sense of calm, your smile and your voice.
The video that echoes the most for me is how to fill notebooks ! I have so many, that I had hardly used... now I'm starting to fill them.
Here's to many more years and videos with great content. Thank you for all you do
Happy birthday Lavendaire 🎉 I love this channel so much and I am so greatful for you and all of the wisdom that you shared. I've been actually implementing the things I learned and starting to form my journey rather than just watching. Thank you and more success to come ❤
Happy bday Lavendaire, i love this channel a lot. Its so motivational and following this channel has made my mindest chaged a lot in positive direction. Love u LANENDAIRE
Thank you, thank you, thank you! You said just what I needed to hear in just the moment I needed to hear it. I hope you are aware of the amazing positive impact you are having in peoples lives, bless you xoxo
CONGRATULATIONS FOR YOUR 5TH YEARS OF LAVENDAIRE. YOU INSPIRED ME A LOT. MUCH LOVE FROM MALAYSIA🇲🇾🌸
I'm so grateful I came across your channel about 3 years ago where I was at a point in my life where I just felt like a failure and I was sick of the world. Now I think I've grown a lot but I still struggle with negative inner thoughts, but I'm not gonna stop fighting.
You looked so different five years ago! Compared to now, you've grown so much and inspired a lot of people-including me-and I love that! What a perfect timing to watch this video since it's May 1st 💕
You are amazing. Really inspiring and authentic. People are always gonna have opinions and bad things to say, I believe is a way to protect themselves but that's not on you. You are bringing a great message to the world and that is something great to keep doing! Happy Bday Lavendaire.
this video is everything i need right now. finally found someone who talks the same frequency about this specific thing. i love your channel by the way. thank you.
Ahh, you speak with such wisdom. I've been watching your videos for so long and they always ring true. I love how you present ideas practically, and show that there's no such thing as perfect. Embrace your perfect imperfection! Thank you so much for improving countless people's lives. Happy 5th birthday to Lavendaire!
Happy 5th!!!! Thank you for become our good mentor! Really happy that I found your channel. Love from Indonesia
I just want to say that I am so happy for your Chanel and I am a big supporter of yous. I love your videos and how you are a big inspiration for your viewers. You help us a lot❤️. You are absolutely right, nobody is perfect but everyone expect perfection. It is very hard to just let things you can not control go but it is possible. I have started mindfulness and self love for almost a year and it is never ending learning. I have always struggled with no support from my family and their repeating opinion about me still hurts but I try to not care much. I absolutely agree that when someone has an opinion about you, do not waste your time to change it. It can start argument and you do not need this. The most important is really love yourself and if you really do, others opinion does not matter.
I wish you all the best in the future and happy anniversary 💋.
Ypu nailed it, Aileen. This is what I need to hear right now.
I usually have a habit of caring what other people think of me, but no,always remind ourselves that we are good enough.
Congratulations on your 5th year! You are so inspirational and positive. Thank you for simply being YOU! “Progress not Perfection”, Amen!
I love how you sound so much calmer as a person now 💚 I struggle so bad with not caring what others think. I’m that person I’m imaging everyone hates me or is talking bad about me . I’ve come so far though, because I LOVE myself more and more everyday, and I’m learning who I truly am. And having an amazing significant other who has supported and loved me, has helped tremendously as well 💚✌🏼
Hi miss lavendaire!I would like to say that you made a big part of my life cause your contents are so helpful to me!Your words make me happy and stay motivated in times I feel lazy in doing such things.Also,I'am happy to share with you that the video of yours about building a habit that sticks HELPS ME ALOT.Infact,I have build 2 habits so far.But I'm still in the process of developing and finding myself and yeah!I wish you the best in your life,relationship and your health!And also!I wish you would pursue what you love in this world!I love you😊❣😘
You're a beautiful evolutioned soul. Your light transcends the screen. People projections are just that. People get triggered by their subconscious mind, showing them their own fears and wounds, but people (they, we, you &I) have to be aware to perceive it. Keep shining 🌟!
And you are more than good enough Aileen! Your light shines thru all your videos and helps thousands of people believe they can get thru their struggles, to get back up, give themselves another chance, love themselves with all imperfections. ❤
Congratulations for this five years and for inspiring my life too. Lots of love from Nicaragua.
Happy Birthday Lavendaire ❤
I was not here five years ago but I will surely be here five years from now 😍
My fave videos are the dream life series cause I followed every video and filled all the exercises and I loved it!
P.s: Congratulations to you Aileen for creating an amazingly helpful channel and keeping it great and original for five years along with your other projects! I wish you succes and inner peace from now on ❤❤
I used to watch you and I stumbled across this 5-year anniversary video and it came just when I really needed it. Thank you :)
Hi Aileen! Thank you for all your job 💜💜💜 I watched you already 2 years and you ve trully become my best friend for this time😊😊. my fav videos about journaling and self love ,about ways how to love yourself and dont care what other people will think. Much love from Russia💜💜💜
i'm crying. i'm overwhelmed. thank you so much, i've been waiting for a person like you in my life. thank you so much 😭💜
Aweee lots of good vibes your way ☀️✨✨
You bring so much love and light in life! Thank you ❤️❤️
Aileen🌸 Congrats on 5th birthday🎉🍹 Thank you so much for all the beautiful videos. My morning starts with your thought-provoking inspirational refreshing videos and breakfast☕️ It kinda became my morning ritual🌞 You are more than good enough to me💖
Love you and hope you make it through to 10th anniversary✨
INDEED, STRONG POINTS!!! CONGRATULATIONS FOR ALL THE SUCCESS YOU ACHIEVED, TOTALLY DESERVED!
Daaaaaaang Aileen 😍 you're just killing the game. As always I love love love how you explain things. I for one definitely needed to hear this. Thank you for putting yourself out there. You'll always be my role model. 💜
And happy birthday lavendaire! 💜💜💜
Viana thank you!! 💜💜
Wow, happy 5th birthday, Lavendaire! ☺️ You're such an inspiring person! This video is very helpful to me, like I always think about what other people say or feel about me, but now I think I can, little by little, change that myself. A huge THANKS to you!!! ❤️❤️❤️
I really needed this video. I think when I watch your videos I get that feeling more frequently, which is just so overwhelmingly positive and refreshing. Thank you!❤️
Hi loves! ✨ We just launched a new community program ft. masterminds and monthly live events for personal growth & wellness! Learn more & join here → lavendaire.com/DLC 🫶
Congratulations Aileen,you are such an inspiration.I am a new subscriber so I haven't seen your original video but I am really glad that you refilmed this video. I wish people would stress more on this topic because in my oppinion this is the foundation of happyness, one can never be trully happy until and unless one learns how to stop caring about what others think. As you said criticism hurts to some extent but I will end this with a quote that has inspired me a lot: Your value and self worth does not decrease based on someone's inhability to see it. Hugs
CONGRATS❤️ I loved the fact that you brushed up on these points so deeply. Can't wait to see to these same points 5 years from now💜
Thank you so much for this talk. I just started this job and it feels like I’m in high where everyone talks about each other. I’m trying to make everyone else happy. You said that I only need to make my 5 and 80 year old self. I really thank you. Congratulations on your 5 years!!!
I loved the dream life series videos! It's what inspired me to get the artist of life workbook. My life has changed so much since I started to be intentional about the way I live by using the workbook as a tool. Thank you Aileen for being such an inspiring human being!
Happiness is seeing you smile Aileen. Thanks so much for being an angel in my life. Keep blooming little flower🌸💮
So sweet ☀️
Happy five years!! This is such an amazing message, and it's so difficult to not care about the criticisms of others. I'm constantly working on it, though, and your tips help a lot!
I love how you're always so positive!
Happy Lavendaire's day! Love you Aileen
This video made me feel super happy. Thank you
I really appreciate how much you encourage people to be kind and considerate of others, to not judge, and to not compare themselves. You’re talented, beautiful, and successful and it is easy to look at what you’ve done and allow it to trigger my insecurities so I think you’re doing great work. That being said, I am a nerd and often feel like there should be more citations in your videos to the people who are the originators of many of the ideas and strategies you talk about. Maybe just in the descriptions? But I know the philosophers and leaders behind many of the ideas you elegantly string together and I think it’s only fair to give credit where it’s due. Again, kudos on being such a thoughtful creator, it’s rare!
I am so proud of you! You’ve made a huge difference in how I view myself and the power I have as a woman! I love you so much. Sending you lots of love and positive vibrations from SOUTH AFRICA!!! xx
I really love how you are so authentic and loving! I love you a lot ♥️✨
Thank you so much for your presence♥️
Beautifully put!! Yes ☀️
Loved this video so much! May God bless you endlessly and give you the strength to keep going no matter what other people say. Big congrats on such big achievement! Love you ❤️
Congratulations 5🎂Many many more!! Thank you for EVERYTHING you do for me and others. My life is getting better and better because of you and beautiful teachings. Much love greetings from Dallas TX Always grateful for you 💚
So happy to find this video right when I feel guilty for something I shouldn't this morning. Thank you for the food for thought. Shall cherish my 5yo and 80yo from now. Happy 6th birthday to Lavendaire this year!
Happy birthday Lavendare... My fav channel.. More than Netflix 😁... OK I should stop... Love u Aileen.. ❤️😘
Love you soooo much, your passion to living is everything 😍💕
I love her, too ;)
KGN dream love you ✨
@@lavendaire thank u so much, so glad for taking answer from u🤓
oh. my. god. totally resonated with me-you're spot on with the "little bits of truth" and "you're not good enough" wow! i am so grateful to have human beings like you around :) your content is consistently incredible
This video has made such a BIG impact on me, thank you so much for this. You are such an amazing human being, happy 5th birthday to Lavendaire! 🌸☺️