I withdrew from benzo 20 years ago, after a decade of medicating. Was sick about 6 months, like an acute hangover, then after one year i felt alright. Remembering being paranoid and delusional, feeling like crap and cramping a lot. Its certainly a challenge many cant do!!After months of this you lose your mind, you suffer so bad, all you see is darkness and death. You cant watch tv or meet people, you cant even go to the shop. But i made it, i made it on my own to, no medical assistance. What has it showed me? Only that im strong, im stubborn and i have patience. Im a survivor,,,,
Your story sounds similar to mine. I was basically insane for 10 months . finally the year mark I felt like I made it through, what an Incredible nightmare. You are right that many can't make it through that level and length of suffering and no judgement, I can't believe I did.
I find it very disturbing that my Doctor that I have known for 25 years was upset when I went off 8 medications after ketovere .He Was not happy with me coming of Xanax. He said don’t worry 1 mg is not that much🤪 He defiantly did not think I was going to stop my oxycodone. I went from 240 mg oxycodone a day to none after getting as much as I wanted since 1990! All because I changed my diet! Testosterone went from 806 to 1002 after I stopped walking 5-6 miles a day and resistance kettlebells to 25 lbs after 4 years. I just do 2-30 seconds sprint on rebounder a week. I also do NEAT which is just fidgeting all day. It is so great not having DOMS everyday. All these zealots talking about working out after age 60 are wrong! Cholesterol also dropped from 364 to 190.
Start Drinking Pink Himalayan Salt Water to Lower the Fear by lowering Cortisol & Flushing Out the Adrenaline & Replenishing all 97 Essential Minerals in Body! Google Oink Salt & Anxiety!!! It’s called Sole Water & u can actually put salt directly under tongue & then drink a glass of water!
I went through the same thing. Thinking I was going to wake up after murdering my family, it was literally hell. 26 months down the road the anxiety and paranoia is lifting and I'm starting to feel part of the world again. The fear got so strong that it worse from my toes to my head and locked me inside myself for nearly 2 years so I couldnt feel the world or anyone else around me. The only thing that saved me was the knowledge that it wasnt me. Now I practice so much self love and acceptance, on the other side my life is starting to become beautiful. Only just finding out that everyone else went through similar things. Thankyou Phil, Thankyou universe 🙏❤🙏
@@kencabeen7786 Thanks Ken . Finding out others are or have been going through the same thing brought me a lot of peace, not for the fact others are of have suffered but to know what it was and I'm not alone. Much love, gratitude and healing energies to all 🙏💚🙏
I totally get your story, I tried coming of with no knowledge of what was down the line after 5 days no sleep,my head went,it was like living in a real nightmare,was at 1 point considering putting an end to me being a danger to my family,firstly, then any1 else,but I got hospitalised, but wasn't medicated for 3 days,buy that time I'd well and truly met the devil, eventually gave me some kinda benzo and coming around,long story short,because of the lack of knowledge, and fear of death, I had to find s1 to medicate me,so I'm down to 10 ml of Diaz,pd, thanks for your story, cos I know when I get down to 0 😱, at least I now know that it's not just me that sees the blood and gore,and scenario's that can never be,take care my freind
Nothing comforts me. It's been 20 months and its the depths of hell. There are some wonderful couches out there that have gone through this but you need to pay to talk to them and it's not cheap. 😢
I quit benzos about a year ago, and I am still suffering pretty significantly. I have watched tons of videos and I will say this is one of the most uplifting and positive ones I've ever seen. Thank you!
@@zonnebloem100 Hi Truus, 15 months in and I still have horrible fatigue, morning cortisol surges, intrusive thoughts, fear for no reason, akathisia, and heightened anxiety. I have had a few brief windows, but for the most part the symptoms are ongoing.
@@zonnebloem100 yes, it's a brutally long process, but others have healed and we will too. At least we know this is truly Benzo withdrawal and a real condition There are thousands of others who have suffered through this and will validate that Benzo withdrawal isn't just "all in our heads."
@@aphysique thank you, yes, retired from the military and living the civilian life. In many ways military life was much easier, lol. Still deep in the struggle, months 16-17 have been harder than months 6-7 and that is very frustrating. How are you doing?
Phil!!! I have NEVER heard anyone describing the symptoms I had like you just did! I'm yelling at my phone; yes! yes! and yes! when you were talking about the phone ringing or someone someone coming to the door and just feeling petrified. My insides shook physically and you felt that too! I also feel like coming back from hell has given me the strength to get through anything like you mentioned! Thank you, thank you, thank you for being the first person to feel the exact same feelings I had in the throws of what I also called "hell on earth". Thank you, God, for getting me threw it. ❤
You spoke my truth in this video. I never understood how people who had kids could take their life. But benzos almost made me do this. It's a constant hell. I couldnt even walk to my letter box. It terrified me to leave the house. I avoided all my loving family because I thought they were plotting against me. I'm now over the mental side of this hell just have the physical symptoms for lack of sleep and constant neck pain. Coming through this makes u so greatful you will never ever take your health for granted when you get through this. Thanks for this .
@matchpoint I never stabilized during my taper. It was a nightmare. The nightmare continues 66 months off. I used to get long windows, now just constant wave of varying intensity. All the best to you.
@matchpoint I never took more than 40 m g per year for about ten years then 'tapered' ...kindled too many times. I took more during the taper than any other year but the last one.
I almost took my life a few years ago when an er Dr told me " if you wanna die, than JUST DIE" now I fight for more understanding for people like my self who's seen to much Drs no longer caring about the "first, DO NO HARM" thing they're supposed to live by.
I love this video! I am ending 14 years in severe WD, caused by doctors and the NCMB. I am finally coming back. I did think about killing myself....all the time! Never thought that before and I don't feel that way now. All of this was so bizarre. I am hoping to open a slow taper in Chapel Hill, NC within the year. Thanks for the positivity. I am totally normal!!! Whew!!! I am so happy to be coming back. I am much more chill now than I have ever been in my life!!! Just poking out from this. I clawed my way back! Life is getting better now! Hang in there y'all.
😢😮🤯🫣.. yeah I've been on dizepam for 4yr but started buying tubs of a thousand eating them like sweets.. after my ex of 14yr took my 11yr old and 9yr sons ..she moved told me they had a new dad after wee split up I got a new gf my gran who brought me up died my 15yr old little cousin committed suicide.. I was having nightmares was in a bad place but stupidly took dizepam then I could could sleep.. and got prescribed them but 2mg so I bought tubs of a thousand I'm 37 now and I don't think I could face years of withdrawal.. I'm now on trt go to the gym back training bjj everyone says ow your looking great 🙄 you have no idea 🤷🏻 my fault should have dealt with the trauma not blocked it out but I thought I was loosing the plot .. my kids were my life now there older back seeing them now taking them to there sports clubs football ⚽️ and judo .. both talented kids year's of withdrawal loosing my job 🙄 I don't no how I'm going to get off these I just take enough now to feel normal.. but I no without them I could seizure and die so I'm told .. but years of hell 😔 yeah I don't no if I could through that.. please 🙏 never take benzodozepines
I'm now 18 months off Lorazepam (Ativan), forced cold turkey after 7 years use and seriously questioning whether I'll make it. Never felt so scared in my life, I am reduced to a child-like state at times especially in the evenings when all hell still sometimes breaks loose, despite being out of the acute phase. What makes this worse still is that the crushing fatigue, lack of quality sleep and pain can make it really hard to distract in any meaningful way. Plus the brain fog makes it so hard to think logically about things instead of letting my emotions take control. This is truly a horrific process to go through, and I feel so alone due to others not being able to understand... I mean, how COULD they? People like us need to band together, it's the only way through really. Thanks for your words of wisdom and encouragement, it's so important to make people who are going through this aware of the fact that they're temporarily damaged by these drugs and not insane. Stay strong everyone. 💪
@@diefilmkitchenjohannessand2173 Sorry for the delay in replying. Let's just say that I've lost all hope in getting the life that I used to have back. I took this garbage because for some reason I trusted the professional who had the authority to get a prescription for it, amongst other meds that I had adverse reactions to. I was anti-medication, but I took them anyway... perhaps out of desperation. Thanks for asking, I don't know what your situation is but I wish you all the best.
Phil, your optimism is uplifting. I am stuck at 1.25mg of Ativan.....from 4mg. I was proud of myself from getting down from 4 to 1.25mg. I went to my doctor who wanted to take it ALL from me which made me go into a panic attack! He said, "So, I am supposed to be proud of you? You have been doing this for a year......"....I WAS SO SAD. I am so sick with naseua, light hurts my eyes, I get angry at everyone.......thank you for saying that IT'S NOT ME! I am so angry at myself for getting myself addicted!
It can get harder as you go down. Hold until you stabilize. You are doing great! Never mind your doctor! He is not the person to look to for anything but a prescription until you are off benzos.
@@morningwithgracie7870 : thank you so much for asking.......the best thing was sticking through until I have reached a plateau of .5mg......I DID find a different doctor too..... :D
I’m down to just a sliver of klonopin tapering down from .5 for 20 yrs. I relate to this guy so much paranoia, staying in house ,praying in closet for 2 hrs mostly to escape reality, I’m close to the skipping days , I still take ambien but one thing at a time., Everyone please go very slow it’s been 4 yrs of tapering keep suffering down as much as you can. Thank you this is one of the best channels I have seen for me .
@@59Disciple why have you decided to go off of klonopin amd has .5 always been the dose for the 20 years? Did you use the Ashton manual to tapper? Thank you 🙏🏻
I’m 5years X free, and right now I’m in a struggle. Major anxiety, health anxiety. Fearful that after all the taper struggles that I’m now going to die! It’s been all consuming. Is anyone else having an issue with sudden BP spikes? My bp has been normal, and all of a sudden very high spike. Benzo’s are the devil in pill form. I’m so glad I stumbled on your channel. It certainly gives me hope. Thank you ☺️
Thank you for this. 20 months in. I can walk out my front door now after being bedbound with every symptom under the sun for 18 months. But the fear and anxiety and depression are by far the worst. Still have major fatigue after very light stimulation but the fear has gone which is good.
What a force you are. I appreciate so much about this video and testimony. Your descriptions of the perpetual fear state one becomes suspended in is well articulated. I love the tree growing analogy. What a passionate servants heart you have. I applaud your willingness to help others and help them frame what is happening to them. I am curious if you ever unearthed the genetic cause of your teenage anxiety, insomnia... Thank you for all you do, Phil. Thank you.
Thank you for this. It's so hard for me to explain to ppl these exact feelings how fucked up the things that run through my brain are . If I was honest they'd put me in a mental institute . I have lost complete hope and feel I'm dead inside just waiting for my body to catch up. This is hell on Earth. Thank you . Thank you so much for giving me a glimmer of hope , when i see there's no light at the end of the tunnel .
Did you feel your brain doesn't function normally and can't understand that people can do normal things and can't understand that people live their lives normally and became overwhelmed of any normal things? I call it brain lock. It is awful. I was prescriped a big amount of oxazepam and doctor didn't warn me after my dog had to put to sleep at the age of 16 and then this hell started. Too tapers went badly wrong, too quick. Now long tapering ahead and have no power left but I want this drug off of me and have my good life back. It would be very helpful if you can answer if you had any problems with brain function. This is keeping me not being with anybody because I just tell my hell all the time to my loved ones and feel like I am in a different reality from other people. And normally I'm social, active, confident person. This is pure hell alone.
Thank you so much for posting such a positive, uplifting story. There’s so much negativity and doom and gloom surrounding this subject of benzo withdrawal that it can be discouraging to even attempt to get off these meds. When medical professionals have failed you and the average person has no idea what the experience is like, you feel like there’s no place to turn so naturally you go searching for answers. Unfortunately the echo chamber of internet horror stories is what I have found which are not beneficial (although they may be true). This video was a beacon of hope and I am grateful for having come across it. Godspeed to all going through this and stay strong in the fight!
On benzos for over 28 years for sleep and anxiety (xanax for first 6 years, klonopin for rest of time) always taken as directed. Learned through Jordan Peterson about dangers of brain damage benzos cause, called my doc wanting to stop them. She told me to just stop, no mention of the word "taper" so I stopped. Never took another since, was 29 months ago now. Withdrawal was deadly and horrific, the worst lasted 5-6 months. Couldn't speak and make sense, very confused, extreme heart pounding, hyperventilation, nonstop panic attacks, migraines, couldn't sit still, burning pain, crying, cramping, couldn't sleep over an hour with horrible nightmares, intense fear of seeing anyone, would not answer phone, nausea/vomiting, diarrhea, ears ringing, couldn't swallow sometimes, twitching, electric zaps all over, etc. Was afraid to go to ER since i believed they would give me benzos again and I would have to start withdrawal all over again (couldnt have driven there anyway). Hard to say which symptom was worse, but intense fear was at top of list. Now, 29 months later, am better than before, but am very little like the person I was before. New health issues of chronic arrhythmia and a really unpleasant issue called "small fiber neuropathy" which i may have slightly before but now it rules my life. Quite severe anxiety and poor sleep are still there, but I can usually hide the anxiety, couldnt hide the panic during the bad months.
I’m 84 and tapered klonopin with no other drug. I’m off now 20 months and it’s still rough. Exhaustion,dizziness, neuropathy, visual sensitive to light. Sleep not regular 8 hours. Wake up during night and can’t go back to sleep. Using a walker because of balance and dizziness. This poisin ruined my life. I have no other health issues. Also I was not under medical supervision during taper. Only Beating Benzos as my help.
Thank you for this. I came off a very low dose of klonopin this past February and I’m still feeling it. I have OCD and withdrawal from benzos has made it 100x worse. I’m praying for light at the end of this dark tunnel. This was an encouraging video.
Thank you. I'm 74 and addicted, sorry dependent, on this terrible drug, sorry, medication(klonopin) 20 years doctor addicted and I feel I'm dying. My GP is next to useless. I have begged, pleaded, cajoled to my GP to refer me to an addiction psychiatrist to no avail. I NEED HELP! Thank you for this video.
Thank you for sharing your experience with us. I've been on benzo's, mostly Xanax 6-8 mgs and Ambien 10 mgs, since 1994. I have tried going off of them and it's too horrific. I have Emphasima and asthma and had to go to the hospital because my 02 levels went to 62. They found out I had Covid and put me there for 10 days. They weren't giving me any of my medicine for 10 days! I was having hallucinations, both audio and visual and paranoia. I thought the doctor wanted to put me to sleep, like a dog. I was terrified. All of the nurses had to wear all of that plastic gear and I thought it was all the same nurse just putting on different costumes. I have a very mean son who kept messing with me over the phone putting all kinds of ideas in my head, so that didn't help. I was so shot out they they got scared and sent me down for a brainscan. They never told me the result. I also remember my body twitching and jerking uncontrollably. It was horrifying and I never want to go through anything like that again. God bless you for being so strong that you were able to come off of these poisions.poisons. You are a legit Rock Star ⭐️⭐️
I lost my husband after a lot of trauma taking care of him for a few years. I went on xanax for 9 months usually about 1.75 mg per day. I've gotten worse and it's not working much. Psychiatrist wants me to up the dose of xanax and tried me on antidepressants. Nothing working because I'm scared of all medicine and i guess i don't take it long enough. My anxiety is out of control, getting more depressed, can't drive very far, out of breath, and very miserable. Any suggestions. I need help desperately!
Thank you so much for this video. This is me on every level. I've been on Xanax for 20+ years and now I am at 4mgs. Which is the max dose. My doctor is not helping me any. So I'm going to slowly ween off and I know it won't be easy. I'm done feeling worthless. I have thought about suicidal. No more pain, no more being dependent on this garbage. No more crying everyday. Is it worth leaving this world? Absolutely NOT! I'm hoping to get through this once and for all! Starting to do things in my life to hopefully make it a little easier to get off these evil pills. Thank you so much for this video and giving me hope!!
You can do it!! talk with your Doctor and make sure to taper with Diazapam for MONTHS or it will be pure hell after 20 years and that dose, it will still be hell but less so, and much safer
I hope you are doing better. I see you commented a month ago. My son is 1 week off Xanax cold Turkey from 5mg/day. It’s very ugly here. I’m an emergency RN and I have to say I’m a little scared for him.
What an uplifting video. Most of the videos and comments are so scary and depressing. I am 65 yrs old and been on Ativan for about 15 yrs. I'm bipolar and have been stable for 4 yrs I'm tapering now and haven't had the mind games yet but if I do I don't think I can carry on I can't risk going back to suicide mode. You seem such a positive soul thank you for your comforting message.
Thanks for sharing this Phil and can totally relate. I came from an abusive and dysfunctional family and was always anxious. I had my first drink at 13 which made me feel good and continued for years not knowing I was self medicating then one day at 24 it hit the fan with a full blown panic attack and was placed on Ativan which helped greatly but then I felt I needed more and the Dr said he couldn’t and changed me to Klonopin which still taking which helped but feel that’s not working as good and put on additional Buspar. I want to stop all of this but looks like a long journey ahead of me! But thank you again for this amazing and encouraging message, it really gave me hope! 🙏🏽
Wow! What a powerful testimony. Just come out of a wave as of today, I'm nearly at the finish line, I'm down to 1.5mg of diazapam as of last three days. God bless you for your encouraging words.
I don't mean to discourage you... but it took me about 2.5 years to go from 1.5 to zero.... and it was NONSTOP HELL ... it slowly started getting better about 4 months after my taper completely ended...
@Peter I am just speaking the truth.... I lost everything including my 27 year career.... It was BEYOND HELL ON EARTH... for years with ZERO relief... I begged God to kill me constantly ...I couldn't bring myself to commit suicide.. (although I do know of a few going thru this that I spoke to that did kill themselves) .... That is the simple truth... now at about 5 years later.... I am completely healed. Also.... this eas the first drug i had ever taken.... besided penecillin. I was is excellent shape and could run 10 miles without even breathing hard... did pull ups and lifted weights... I was in tip top Marine shape.
@Peter yes.... very short.... And I can say this now.... For some reason.... I am glad it happened to me. It literally showed me how someone can survive something that is literally UNENDING HELL BEYOND WORDS.... I am now stronger in many ways than ever before in my life. It also got me started reading the Bible..... and I have read it 3.5 times since then... and still do daily. Thankfully God didn't kill me..... he saved me. (while I was in the throws of the severe brain damage from the Ativan.... I would have NEVER IN A MILLION YEARS said I was glad it happened to me).
@Peter I took 1mg of Ativan for 2 weeks for insomnia... then I cut down over about 3 weeks...when I got to about .3mg... it got VERY VERY BAD.... and lasted for almost 3 years 24/7 ..... now about 5 years later I am completely healed... WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?????
Hello Phil, what you say is very True! Been on benzos for about 50 yrs and 3 yrs off them completely and in spite of the extremely difficult withdrawal..I still feel better than ever for I am free now.. Thank you for this video for I needed to hear this today. Bless you.
"Once you realize your soul and body and mind have disconnected, You're as sane as can be" - I cant describe how important this fuking insight is to sufferers. Im a doctor who has spent 7 years battling the dysfunction caused by these drugs and the injury after withdrawal and I spent YEARS thinking only about this disconnect and how it works trying to solve it. You cant solve it, you have to weather it, and remind yourself your sane as you do. Thats the correct pathway forward. If your new to this, pls pls pls take away the gravity of this brilliant insight provided by Phil, I dont know Phil and Im not usually charitable with complements, but this blew me away. He articulated something clearly Id been wrestling with for years and it breaks my heart. Ty Phil
Thank you for the video sharing I am 70 years old and have been taking Ativan for more than 20 years and Ambien for probably a couple of years I've seen all the videos about people and their withdrawal symptoms and it makes me think why should I stop and go through that hell
Thanks for sharing your story . I lost my mind & destroyed almost everything in my life . 6 years off diazepam. Don’t feel right ! Get well soon guys .
Thank you for the validation. I am in such hell because of ativan. This made me cry, when you said 'you're not you'. This does make me feel completely crazy and I don't feel like me at all.
My physical symptoms after SSRI have been extreme and the worst. Can hardly walk and move around. Mostly in bed 13 months off. Will I be disabled for years. Can the physical injury heal?
yes i noticed that too. The mental are terrible but nothing in comparison to being unable to walk, move, or stay alive for years on end in bed, feeling like ur on life support
It took me over 6 months of intense special diet and exercise strategies, but I basically got back to "normal" and have been recovered for over 5 years. Mine involved HIIT (high intensity interval training) combined with intermittent fasting to rev up hormonal growth factors, which I think help regrow the neural links you referred to (GABA).
You are lucky you didn’t have extreme muscle rigidity, contracture, spasm, pulling, dystonia plus severe muscle wasting that is nit related to inactivity. I would love to be able to even sit or find a bearable position to lie in.
In benzo tolerance at present and going through everything you mention. Every thought is intrusive and the guilt I feel about my life, my 2 yr old daughter etc is eating me up. The autumn/fall months seem to make me even worse and I’m stuck at 2.5mg of Ativan but this video really helped today. You probably know how you grab onto any piece of hope. I feel like I’ve lost my mind. The obsession with death and that your time is coming etc. This is so accurate. Thanks for this
@ Phil Eichinger, have you ever heard of Nardil? It's the 'gold standard' for social anxiety, panic attacks, agoraphobia, and ptsd and completely obliterates all anxiety. It's a different feeling from benzos in that you don't even feel it 'kick in'. You are yourself and now you're supposed to be.
@@3aeren Meh... its not so bad. In fact the side effects are wayy less than SSRI's, SNRI's, alpha blockers, beta blockers, tricyclics, and even benzodiazepines.
@Wash my soul with words I was given benzo and antidepressant and beta blocker 13 years. Cold turkeyed 15 months back n damaged my whole body n brain. I ve no Hope's I ll heal. I cant feel parts of my body.i really didn't know my psychiatrist was a devil in white coat. Hell to her. I just had anxiety when I was 24 ..now 39 she never told me about these drugs never did I knew about cold turkey infact she kept lying me these drugs r safe. Who is accountable. My wife n family no one believes me none trusts me. I lost my career my frnds relatives everything. I am.left to rott and there will be a day I ll be kicked out of my home n thrown into a rehab. My life is over at 39 considering painful ways to end this agony. Takinh torture from 15 months. I can't do this anymore. My symptoms r left side body weekness numbness lik I got a stroke n it just doesn't go making me difficult to walk pr work. Hell to my doctor I wish I can kill her
Thank you sooo much I just nearly cried, I didn't know what was going on I had the blood, the death,the self loathing, and had 2 go back,on a reduction ended up in hospital thanks,WALES ❤
Thank you for sharing. I chose to take the final dive from pills to plant 2 years ago. It almost killed me but I can gladly say being told my baby is proud of me is the reason I can gladly choose to remain clean!
What is the best way to taper of 2.5 mg of valium at night and 2.5 in the morning. My useless doctor took me off 5mg at night after being on it 5 months. So I was on nothing at night . It was awful last Thurs, severe anxiety crying sweaty
Thank you for this🙏🏻 I am in it still and so full of fear and certain my life is ending. Once in awhile I get a window. I meditate, do breathing, try to eat better. I feel so alone and I cry almost all day every day. This gives me some hope. Right now I am with a partner who doesn’t fully understand also. He gets angry when I cry. Because of covid I am more isolated, but have a doctor and a therapist, and online support. Still so sure I am not going to get through this. I pray constantly for miracles. Thank you for this, it helps.
Hi Phil.. Thanks for this video.. I have watched it about ten times. O boy this is brutal. Please pray for me. I'm in this now. Take care. God bless you. 🌹
Am withdrawing from both diazepam and tramadol now. It's one month now and I really both anxious and depressed. In fact the has become worse the last two weeks. I have insomnia and terrible days, thinking of death and a terrible days ahead. I also have resistant h.pylori, making me not to eat properly. I liked your video, can you please help me. Thanks Omar
Great video, I thought I was going crazy, didn't sleep or eat for 4 days, relapsed after 4 days because I couldn't take the withdrawal anymore, but will try again, this video has given me hope that I may make it through to the other side of this one day soon, I hope.
Thank you, thank you, thank you soo much. Ive felt like everybody abandoned me completely and reliving ancient memories and reliving thoughts of how I'd failed everybody. Yes I had this weird constant existential dread, terrified in my own house but couldn't pin point why.. Awful. 6 months clear, had insane craving today and it frightened me as I never never want to take poison ever again. The terror of the door. Now that's gone still jumpy a lot, sometimes feels like taking an overdose of cacaine and lsd, a very very bad trip, brain damaged trauma.
I had that fight or flight, butterflies-in-the-stomach feeling 24/7 for over a year from intense anxiety and insomnia. Then I started doing benzos and became addicted for a year. Getting off was a living hell. Thank God I’m ok now.
Hi, How did you get off of them? Im on .5mg clonazapam 6 years. I have those buterflys feel like Dragons though. Inxiety insomnia all that aswwell, i feel like im loosing it. Its taken a tole on wife and kids, about to loose it all😢
@@junior4984 I went into a rehab for 90 days, which my work insurance paid for, thank God! Once there, I went cold turkey off 1mg clonazepam/day. It was horrible, but I was surrounded by caring, supportive people who had been where I was and they helped me through it. I'm almost 8 months off now and am doing really well. I know I'm one of the lucky ones. I wish you all the best in getting off that evil poison.
Thank you so much for this. I have been tapering slowly and am at 0.04mg v today. I will be walking off in five days at 0.01. I have had mostly waves this month.
Thank you so much for sharing, and your vulnerability. I really needed to hear this-as I’m going on my 8th year of Benzodiazepine Dependency. It has made my life feel like a bad mushroom or acid trip. It’s comforting to know that this is not me... it really does feel like some form of PTSD, the sleeplessness, ruminating, and constant fear. I’m looking forward to better days
I'm 66 years old and 66 months off Ativan prescribed for insomnia caused by menopause. I am suffering so badly. I had a five month window at 3.5 years off and thought I was almost healed...but the last year and a half has been worse mentally...although all the mental crap comes from the insane and weird pain attacks all over my body. I only took Ativan as needed...like 40-50 mg per year and still developed tolerance withdrawal. Doc forced me on several psych meds, that all made me worse in different ways. I'm losing hope. I've wished for death, to die in my sleep because I can't take this torture any more. I convinced my son to move in two years ago otherwise I might have been committed and would've had to find homes for my dog and two cats. My son is leaving soon. I don't know how I can be on my own with constant fear of dying. Nothing breaks the fear except sleep, or the symptoms lift, arbitrarily. It's been over a year since I had a multiday window. I get a few hours in the morning where I can do laundry, play with the dog, make meals to freeze, etc., but so often, no matter what I eat, my stomach and brain start reeling and I'm in bed by early afternoon. Thank you for your frankness. I was looking for hope today. How long did it take you to heal? I've had some spectacular windows but now it's just day after day of torture. Covid sure hasn't helped. My muscles are wasting away from no exercise. Air hunger and rapid heart make it really hard to walk. I used to go to yoga and aquafit but that stopped with covid. I was never addicted, I hated taking it during my misguided taper...i need out of this because it's killing me.
@@aileenfulgens1909 my frd I quit alc take clonazepam 2.5 and qutipen 75 for sleep only 15 days then quit no taper feel disconnection of kknee to thigh and arms 396 days sober
My 31 yr old son has had the prime of his life taken from him. 18 months off klonopin and you have given us hope this torture will end. He is in a wave right now(6 weeks) came out of no where BUT he is improving slowly.
Coming off Ativan and have switched to Diaz to slow taper. It is hell on Earth. I am losing my relationships everywhere and almost my life. I am praying I have the ending you had. I know I essentially have brain damage but the not knowing how long it will take to recover or if I ever will is excoriating while watching my loved ones suffer because of these devil pills. Thanks for the video
i needed that,im 2 months clean of valium and by god its rough,crazy thoughts going true my head crazy withdrawals but i aint going back taking them stupid tablets i tell you that,thank you phil you are an inspiration.
The loneliness being in this situation. It's like fighting a beast which only you can see but is invisible for everyone else around you. They cant understand. God bless everyone who is in this situation
@@tyrel510 Hello My Friend, Healing is a Lifelong process and Lifestyle. I remain living a life beyond my wildest dreams. Still 110% of where I was before this insane journey started. It is out there. Ahead of You. I Promise. I will be doing more videos in the NewYear. My Other. Promise. Merry Christmas.
HI Phil, thanks for the time to make this video.....so so helpful and reassuring. However I'm only a few months away from 3 yrs and things are still very messy. Suffering terribly. Im still stuck in FEAR mode and totally agoraphobic still. I have tried to break it but it just plagues me all day long with no reprieve. I also still have crazy internal vibrating and bouts of akathisia still. And the thoughts, holy hell....the death obsession is horrific. And some other things like tinnitus and eye floaters. Im getting pretty worn out and just losing hope. Does this shit really end for everyone? Yes some symptoms are definitely gone or lessened dramatically but these big ones still haunt me very intensely. I wont make years more of this shit...its going to be a real battle to make it months or even this Xmas after so so long.
Hang in there brother I read your post I’m suffering too and I am wash for close to five years. Number one you’re not alone I know you don’t wanna be a part of this crowd nor do I but we are. We’re going to heal you just have to believe and give it time.I can’t watch TV at times I can’t listen to the radio sometimes sounds even bother me sometimes. Relationships LOL it’s hard to talk about anything else when you’re consumed in your thoughts so I get it. We’re going to get better just hold on tight listen to what Phil said and let’s keep on going to work.
You probably have an underlying anxiety or depression disorder that needs treating......just quitting benzos doesn't sound like enough. Lots of people use them for chronic anxiety I'd look into safer treatments
I’m Currently encouraging my loved one to pull thru with a Benzo (Ativan) withdrawal within a month under their care . The hospital loaded him up in the stuff & others as well but it’s such a process man ofcourse the guessing games with some doctors is shocking but that’s definitely something I’m learning with the blessing of technology is research as much as you can on your own.
Did slow taper off of K. I jumped at .025 what you say is true. I’m off 9 days. Last night had sweats and night terrors. I’m going to beat this. Thanks for this video.
75 days off klonopin, went to rehab, I'm 3wks out and struggling...I was doing so well in "the bubble" but feel like I'm regressing now..but you just helped me keep the faith
I'm in real trouble here. I've been on Benzos for over 15 years-close to twenty. There were a lot of major traumarizing events in my life and I thought I was fine but then started having panic attacks.Some of the most terrifying experience(s) in my life. (remember they brought Tony Soprano to his knees!). I can't even describe them. They're not like anxiety. Anyway, I finally was properly diagnosed and put on an antidepressnat (Paxil/Lexapro) and given Lorazepam - for when one attack starts to happen. Everything was working! Great! But then depression symptoms were getting worse AND thhey never stopped the Benzos. Whether it was a Psych or GP they just kept refiling them. One Psych told me, when I finally started doing research, that it was just Scientologists saying Benzos were bad and not to believe anything I was reading online. Then, when I took an extra couple of pills- when I was having a really bad day- I knew I was going to run out. My GP (I couldn't afford a Psych0 wouldn't even give me two pills. I thought I would be ok because I only took what thhey prescibed (yeah for about ten years now) I had to go to the ER and they reluctantly gave me a couple.My GP started saying 'You kno you're an addict.' WTF? Because of doctors like you! There are more horro stories about missing over a day. Or days where I would literally be up all night, waiting for the pharmacy to open. And I would take one-at the pharmacy- just to feel 'normal' again. Dealing with all of this plus my MDD (caused bt Benzos?) has cost me so much. I've lost everyone in my life.I'm in very bad financial shape, I have no support so stopping is not even an option for me. My brother committed suicide (in another state) and my family. -what;s left (and who don't live here) think I can pray it away. I have no one to pay the bills or help with anything. My boyfriend, friends can't deal with me 9or just feel helpless). I don't have any hope anymore. I'm not even a unctioning adult. I've never been this honest or open online. I'm really scared.
can i tapper of both clonazepam (0.5 mg) & vortioxetin (10mg) have been using for 3 weeks only.. I don't want to stay on these pills which cannot give me relef rather more I'll feeling.. Please advice me n ur support needed 🙏 iam eagerly waiting for ur reply, I don't want to regret in future help me. .
To calm my withdrawal physical part.. so i cannot get up i lay flat on my bed and ask anxiety to show its brutality at max my eyes continuously focused on the roof i stay like that for 1-2 hour and the anxiety the symptoms starts to fade everytime.... My healing process and my way of dealing with the hellfire symptoms is with hellfire.... Poison can cut poison... I have not seen people with my way of dealing not even a percent.... And for lazy people let me tell you my symptoms... (What I've seen so far 100's but these were horrifying) Bloodpressure - 170/130 heartrate 165 Spine burning like I've put in the piranha solution My body feels so bloated like I'm going to explode like a Nuclear bomb My head feels like demons anger to kill anyone My body is a spasm machine I couldn't eat anything like my soul and body working totally differently.... On 6th month today I've mastered the technique so well that even the worst symptoms cannot withstand.. What meds did i quit - klonopin effexor Antipsychotic (all cold Turkey after 4 years daily usage) I used to get scared as far as i remember from a small stomach ache this made me a monster....
You are gaining Phil. I live on the other side of the world and you taking time out too support others, empower other's with hope and light is so beautiful. Much love From down under 🥰 Hope there's no spelling errors🤪
I'm super grateful for this video. I've watched it a few times (6 months in from a cold turkey). It's like having someone give you a pep talk, who really gets it. My family don't understand and on some level don't believe in withdrawal which makes you doubt yourself. I have to remind myself these awful feelings are not me and its just my poor brain trying to repair from these toxic drugs. Thanks Phil, you're awesome
I'm on my journey day like 75 n I'm tripping but it's getting better.work 12 steps.alot of pulls I stopped after 20 yearslong term mat program n over medicated.lifes good.this video really helped me today;) gonna see a counselour next week hr wk sessions to heal from ripping the bandaid off.good n bad days;)i know it..).its ok to feel crazy.use whatever your higher power is;) life's a trip❤ look thru new eyes.no Mas gabas subs alcohol all at once.jail saved my life.love each other n keep ur head up for those on there journey.forgive urself. new growing
Was on klonopin for over 27 years. My psych kept increasing the amounts as it would reach a point of no longer helping. There was no info. about it being a short time drug and also how dangerous it is to come off of it. My psych left and got a new one a year ago and said he was not going to keep me on klonopin. I was terrified and went cold turkey. I ended up in the hospital, coded, had multiple seizures. I have so many symptoms now that I am home and trying to pick up the pieces from the waves caused by all this damage. I am seeing my psych and an addiction psychiatrist. Even a pharmacist should have warned me.
Phil ...hi...I keep on reading your reply again and again as I find it so positive in my life frustrating situation. Please help and respond as now what should I do to stabilize my horrible withdrawal symptoms from xanax from the last two months, as you said that due to change in brands or manufacturers, my dose which I had also tapered that time, heads to zero. Should I increase my dose a little bit will help? Please help, I trust you, you will give me a positive mindset and suggest some path so that I can hope to live my life again
Hi Phil! I was on clonazepam 0.75 mg a day for the extreme anxiety that got me into hospital. First two months on clonopin felt really well and I thought then that I am healed. I was so wrong...aftrer two months on it I started having the anxiety back struggled with it although on antidepressant. Went to another hospiral in Moldova where they took ne off of it cold turkey and put me on seroquel another antidepressant and and valporic acid. It didn't work as I went into an insane widraval. I couldn't take it animore and I took 0.5 of clonipin every other day for a week which stabilized me then I went on once a week 0.5 and it was ok for two weeks. When I thought I on the right path the symptoms returned. I took 0.5 of clonopin again but it didn't work anymore. Now I really don't know what to do....Thinking of not taking it anymore at all but very afraid of the widraval. I just can't get through that hell that I went...Any suggestions will be much appreciated as the doctors are oblivious on this matter...
So I had been off K for 3yrs and 8 months when i tried a small piece of an Amanita chocolate bar July 2nd. I felt really loving and amazing while on it. However a couple days later I was severely kindled and back into WD’s. I experienced Anxiety, Depression, insomnia, DPDR, food sensitivity, lost 17lbs in 2 weeks, Vision issues (which I still have some), etc etc. Most symptoms have got better 2.5 months later but still have some blurry vision and depression. I didn’t think this would happen and also didn’t know Amanita is basically the strongest Gaba agonist. Apparently you can still be kindled this far out. Has anyone else experienced kindling like this?
Phil... your videos are full of positivity that there is a light at the end of the darkness. Only two weeks are left for me to finish after 6 months long terrible tapering of Alprazolam. I find it very rough and feeling horrible mental and physical symptoms at the end. Do you think it's very tough at the end? Is it this way only? Will it improve and get better after I finish and stop? Please give your valuable guidance.
I withdrew from benzo 20 years ago, after a decade of medicating. Was sick about 6 months, like an acute hangover, then after one year i felt alright. Remembering being paranoid and delusional, feeling like crap and cramping a lot. Its certainly a challenge many cant do!!After months of this you lose your mind, you suffer so bad, all you see is darkness and death. You cant watch tv or meet people, you cant even go to the shop. But i made it, i made it on my own to, no medical assistance. What has it showed me? Only that im strong, im stubborn and i have patience. Im a survivor,,,,
Your story sounds similar to mine. I was basically insane for 10 months
. finally the year mark I felt like I made it through, what an Incredible nightmare. You are right that many can't make it through that level and length of suffering and no judgement, I can't believe I did.
How long you've been on benzo?
@@buangbenzo about 5 years
@@sibbebladh8661Will this be the same withdrawal for ambien?
I find it very disturbing that my Doctor that I have known for 25 years was upset when I went off 8 medications after ketovere .He Was not happy with me coming of Xanax. He said don’t worry 1 mg is not that much🤪 He defiantly did not think I was going to stop my oxycodone. I went from 240 mg oxycodone a day to none after getting as much as I wanted since 1990! All because I changed my diet! Testosterone went from 806 to 1002 after I stopped walking 5-6 miles a day and resistance kettlebells to 25 lbs after 4 years. I just do 2-30 seconds sprint on rebounder a week. I also do NEAT which is just fidgeting all day. It is so great not having DOMS everyday. All these zealots talking about working out after age 60 are wrong! Cholesterol also dropped from 364 to 190.
16 months off Xanax after 13 years. I thank God everyday I made it this far. It is still rough. Thank you brother for your insight.....
Start Drinking Pink Himalayan Salt Water to Lower the Fear by lowering Cortisol & Flushing Out the Adrenaline & Replenishing all 97 Essential Minerals in Body! Google Oink Salt & Anxiety!!! It’s called Sole Water & u can actually put salt directly under tongue & then drink a glass of water!
Well done.
I take xanax for 3 years now. How much Xanax were you taking? How did you stop taking Xanax s please tell me
Thank God, right!
40 YEARS OF XANAX HERE!!!
I went through the same thing. Thinking I was going to wake up after murdering my family, it was literally hell. 26 months down the road the anxiety and paranoia is lifting and I'm starting to feel part of the world again. The fear got so strong that it worse from my toes to my head and locked me inside myself for nearly 2 years so I couldnt feel the world or anyone else around me. The only thing that saved me was the knowledge that it wasnt me. Now I practice so much self love and acceptance, on the other side my life is starting to become beautiful. Only just finding out that everyone else went through similar things. Thankyou Phil, Thankyou universe 🙏❤🙏
Thanks for sharing that. You are a warrior, and I’m so happy you’re getting better!
@@kencabeen7786 Thanks Ken . Finding out others are or have been going through the same thing brought me a lot of peace, not for the fact others are of have suffered but to know what it was and I'm not alone. Much love, gratitude and healing energies to all 🙏💚🙏
I totally get your story, I tried coming of with no knowledge of what was down the line after 5 days no sleep,my head went,it was like living in a real nightmare,was at 1 point considering putting an end to me being a danger to my family,firstly, then any1 else,but I got hospitalised, but wasn't medicated for 3 days,buy that time I'd well and truly met the devil, eventually gave me some kinda benzo and coming around,long story short,because of the lack of knowledge, and fear of death, I had to find s1 to medicate me,so I'm down to 10 ml of Diaz,pd, thanks for your story, cos I know when I get down to 0 😱, at least I now know that it's not just me that sees the blood and gore,and scenario's that can never be,take care my freind
Nothing comforts me. It's been 20 months and its the depths of hell. There are some wonderful couches out there that have gone through this but you need to pay to talk to them and it's not cheap. 😢
@@madelynHernandez5577 The little one in your pic looks adorable...please be strong for you and the little one. God bless.
I quit benzos about a year ago, and I am still suffering pretty significantly. I have watched tons of videos and I will say this is one of the most uplifting and positive ones I've ever seen. Thank you!
@@zonnebloem100 Hi Truus, 15 months in and I still have horrible fatigue, morning cortisol surges, intrusive thoughts, fear for no reason, akathisia, and heightened anxiety. I have had a few brief windows, but for the most part the symptoms are ongoing.
@@zonnebloem100 yes, it's a brutally long process, but others have healed and we will too. At least we know this is truly Benzo withdrawal and a real condition There are thousands of others who have suffered through this and will validate that Benzo withdrawal isn't just "all in our heads."
@@zonnebloem100 hang in there brother, we are healing every day, even if it is moving at a glacial pace.
@@Army1SGRetired Ed you ex military 🎖️, thanks for your service, how are doing bru?
@@aphysique thank you, yes, retired from the military and living the civilian life. In many ways military life was much easier, lol. Still deep in the struggle, months 16-17 have been harder than months 6-7 and that is very frustrating. How are you doing?
Phil!!! I have NEVER heard anyone describing the symptoms I had like you just did! I'm yelling at my phone; yes! yes! and yes! when you were talking about the phone ringing or someone someone coming to the door and just feeling petrified. My insides shook physically and you felt that too! I also feel like coming back from hell has given me the strength to get through anything like you mentioned! Thank you, thank you, thank you for being the first person to feel the exact same feelings I had in the throws of what I also called "hell on earth". Thank you, God, for getting me threw it. ❤
You spoke my truth in this video. I never understood how people who had kids could take their life. But benzos almost made me do this. It's a constant hell. I couldnt even walk to my letter box. It terrified me to leave the house. I avoided all my loving family because I thought they were plotting against me. I'm now over the mental side of this hell just have the physical symptoms for lack of sleep and constant neck pain. Coming through this makes u so greatful you will never ever take your health for granted when you get through this. Thanks for this .
@matchpoint I never stabilized during my taper. It was a nightmare. The nightmare continues 66 months off. I used to get long windows, now just constant wave of varying intensity. All the best to you.
@matchpoint I never took more than 40 m g per year for about ten years then 'tapered' ...kindled too many times. I took more during the taper than any other year but the last one.
I almost took my life a few years ago when an er Dr told me " if you wanna die, than JUST DIE" now I fight for more understanding for people like my self who's seen to much Drs no longer caring about the "first, DO NO HARM" thing they're supposed to live by.
@@aileenfulgens1909 how r u now friend
@@aileenfulgens1909 How are you now?
I love this video! I am ending 14 years in severe WD, caused by doctors and the NCMB. I am finally coming back. I did think about killing myself....all the time! Never thought that before and I don't feel that way now. All of this was so bizarre. I am hoping to open a slow taper in Chapel Hill, NC within the year. Thanks for the positivity. I am totally normal!!! Whew!!! I am so happy to be coming back.
I am much more chill now than I have ever been in my life!!! Just poking out from this. I clawed my way back! Life is getting better now! Hang in there y'all.
😢😮🤯🫣.. yeah I've been on dizepam for 4yr but started buying tubs of a thousand eating them like sweets.. after my ex of 14yr took my 11yr old and 9yr sons ..she moved told me they had a new dad after wee split up I got a new gf my gran who brought me up died my 15yr old little cousin committed suicide.. I was having nightmares was in a bad place but stupidly took dizepam then I could could sleep.. and got prescribed them but 2mg so I bought tubs of a thousand I'm 37 now and I don't think I could face years of withdrawal.. I'm now on trt go to the gym back training bjj everyone says ow your looking great 🙄 you have no idea 🤷🏻 my fault should have dealt with the trauma not blocked it out but I thought I was loosing the plot .. my kids were my life now there older back seeing them now taking them to there sports clubs football ⚽️ and judo .. both talented kids year's of withdrawal loosing my job 🙄 I don't no how I'm going to get off these I just take enough now to feel normal.. but I no without them I could seizure and die so I'm told .. but years of hell 😔 yeah I don't no if I could through that.. please 🙏 never take benzodozepines
Fellow Chapel Hillian here - so glad to hear you're back. I'm working on it and this video was helpful!
I'm now 18 months off Lorazepam (Ativan), forced cold turkey after 7 years use and seriously questioning whether I'll make it. Never felt so scared in my life, I am reduced to a child-like state at times especially in the evenings when all hell still sometimes breaks loose, despite being out of the acute phase. What makes this worse still is that the crushing fatigue, lack of quality sleep and pain can make it really hard to distract in any meaningful way. Plus the brain fog makes it so hard to think logically about things instead of letting my emotions take control. This is truly a horrific process to go through, and I feel so alone due to others not being able to understand... I mean, how COULD they? People like us need to band together, it's the only way through really. Thanks for your words of wisdom and encouragement, it's so important to make people who are going through this aware of the fact that they're temporarily damaged by these drugs and not insane. Stay strong everyone. 💪
How are you now?
@@diefilmkitchenjohannessand2173 Sorry for the delay in replying. Let's just say that I've lost all hope in getting the life that I used to have back. I took this garbage because for some reason I trusted the professional who had the authority to get a prescription for it, amongst other meds that I had adverse reactions to. I was anti-medication, but I took them anyway... perhaps out of desperation.
Thanks for asking, I don't know what your situation is but I wish you all the best.
Phil, your optimism is uplifting. I am stuck at 1.25mg of Ativan.....from 4mg. I was proud of myself from getting down from 4 to 1.25mg. I went to my doctor who wanted to take it ALL from me which made me go into a panic attack! He said, "So, I am supposed to be proud of you? You have been doing this for a year......"....I WAS SO SAD. I am so sick with naseua, light hurts my eyes, I get angry at everyone.......thank you for saying that IT'S NOT ME! I am so angry at myself for getting myself addicted!
It can get harder as you go down. Hold until you stabilize. You are doing great! Never mind your doctor! He is not the person to look to for anything but a prescription until you are off benzos.
How r u? What helped ur nausea?
@@morningwithgracie7870 : thank you so much for asking.......the best thing was sticking through until I have reached a plateau of .5mg......I DID find a different doctor too..... :D
I’m down to just a sliver of klonopin tapering down from .5 for 20 yrs. I relate to this guy so much paranoia, staying in house ,praying in closet for 2 hrs mostly to escape reality, I’m close to the skipping days , I still take ambien but one thing at a time., Everyone please go very slow it’s been 4 yrs of tapering keep suffering down as much as you can. Thank you this is one of the best channels I have seen for me .
@@59Disciple why have you decided to go off of klonopin amd has .5 always been the dose for the 20 years? Did you use the Ashton manual to tapper? Thank you 🙏🏻
I’m 5years X free, and right now I’m in a struggle. Major anxiety, health anxiety. Fearful that after all the taper struggles that I’m now going to die! It’s been all consuming.
Is anyone else having an issue with sudden BP spikes? My bp has been normal, and all of a sudden very high spike.
Benzo’s are the devil in pill form.
I’m so glad I stumbled on your channel. It certainly gives me hope. Thank you ☺️
Thank you, for allowing yourself to be vulnerable and honest in sharing your story, was extremly helpful.
Thank you for this. 20 months in. I can walk out my front door now after being bedbound with every symptom under the sun for 18 months. But the fear and anxiety and depression are by far the worst. Still have major fatigue after very light stimulation but the fear has gone which is good.
sir i request please connect i want help i want knowledge … help me out i dropped klonopin im living in hell
@@Thisisalt5465- Can u help us? please respond as im trying to help a friend 🙏
Thank you for sharing that this... “this is not you” I needed this so much I have had the most horrific mental anguish.
What a force you are. I appreciate so much about this video and testimony. Your descriptions of the perpetual fear state one becomes suspended in is well articulated. I love the tree growing analogy. What a passionate servants heart you have. I applaud your willingness to help others and help them frame what is happening to them. I am curious if you ever unearthed the genetic cause of your teenage anxiety, insomnia... Thank you for all you do, Phil. Thank you.
Hey sis.
Wanna see your vedios of your..its long time you havenot posted ..
We love you too Simone...
Thank you for this. It's so hard for me to explain to ppl these exact feelings how fucked up the things that run through my brain are . If I was honest they'd put me in a mental institute . I have lost complete hope and feel I'm dead inside just waiting for my body to catch up. This is hell on Earth. Thank you . Thank you so much for giving me a glimmer of hope , when i see there's no light at the end of the tunnel .
Did you feel your brain doesn't function normally and can't understand that people can do normal things and can't understand that people live their lives normally and became overwhelmed of any normal things? I call it brain lock.
It is awful. I was prescriped a big amount of oxazepam and doctor didn't warn me after my dog had to put to sleep at the age of 16 and then this hell started.
Too tapers went badly wrong, too quick. Now long tapering ahead and have no power left but I want this drug off of me and have my good life back. It would be very helpful if you can answer if you had any problems with brain function. This is keeping me not being with anybody because I just tell my hell all the time to my loved ones and feel like I am in a different reality from other people. And normally I'm social, active, confident person. This is pure hell alone.
@tyrel how do you know
He ain’t lying.
Thank you so much for posting such a positive, uplifting story. There’s so much negativity and doom and gloom surrounding this subject of benzo withdrawal that it can be discouraging to even attempt to get off these meds. When medical professionals have failed you and the average person has no idea what the experience is like, you feel like there’s no place to turn so naturally you go searching for answers. Unfortunately the echo chamber of internet horror stories is what I have found which are not beneficial (although they may be true). This video was a beacon of hope and I am grateful for having come across it. Godspeed to all going through this and stay strong in the fight!
On benzos for over 28 years for sleep and anxiety (xanax for first 6 years, klonopin for rest of time) always taken as directed. Learned through Jordan Peterson about dangers of brain damage benzos cause, called my doc wanting to stop them. She told me to just stop, no mention of the word "taper" so I stopped. Never took another since, was 29 months ago now. Withdrawal was deadly and horrific, the worst lasted 5-6 months. Couldn't speak and make sense, very confused, extreme heart pounding, hyperventilation, nonstop panic attacks, migraines, couldn't sit still, burning pain, crying, cramping, couldn't sleep over an hour with horrible nightmares, intense fear of seeing anyone, would not answer phone, nausea/vomiting, diarrhea, ears ringing, couldn't swallow sometimes, twitching, electric zaps all over, etc. Was afraid to go to ER since i believed they would give me benzos again and I would have to start withdrawal all over again (couldnt have driven there anyway). Hard to say which symptom was worse, but intense fear was at top of list.
Now, 29 months later, am better than before, but am very little like the person I was before. New health issues of chronic arrhythmia and a really unpleasant issue called "small fiber neuropathy" which i may have slightly before but now it rules my life. Quite severe anxiety and poor sleep are still there, but I can usually hide the anxiety, couldnt hide the panic during the bad months.
I’m 84 and tapered klonopin with no other drug. I’m off now 20 months and it’s still rough. Exhaustion,dizziness, neuropathy, visual sensitive to light. Sleep not regular 8 hours. Wake up during night and can’t go back to sleep. Using a walker because of balance and dizziness. This poisin ruined my life. I have no other health issues. Also I was not under medical supervision during taper. Only Beating Benzos as my help.
Thank you for this. I came off a very low dose of klonopin this past February and I’m still feeling it. I have OCD and withdrawal from benzos has made it 100x worse. I’m praying for light at the end of this dark tunnel. This was an encouraging video.
Thank you. I'm 74 and addicted, sorry dependent, on this terrible drug, sorry, medication(klonopin)
20 years doctor addicted and I feel I'm dying. My GP is next to useless. I have begged, pleaded, cajoled
to my GP to refer me to an addiction psychiatrist to no avail. I NEED HELP! Thank you for this video.
You and this video saved my life and gave me the strength to continue.
Thank you for sharing your experience with us. I've been on benzo's, mostly Xanax 6-8 mgs and Ambien 10 mgs, since 1994. I have tried going off of them and it's too horrific. I have Emphasima and asthma and had to go to the hospital because my 02 levels went to 62. They found out I had Covid and put me there for 10 days. They weren't giving me any of my medicine for 10 days! I was having hallucinations, both audio and visual and paranoia. I thought the doctor wanted to put me to sleep, like a dog. I was terrified. All of the nurses had to wear all of that plastic gear and I thought it was all the same nurse just putting on different costumes. I have a very mean son who kept messing with me over the phone putting all kinds of ideas in my head, so that didn't help. I was so shot out they they got scared and sent me down for a brainscan. They never told me the result. I also remember my body twitching and jerking uncontrollably. It was horrifying and I never want to go through anything like that again. God bless you for being so strong that you were able to come off of these poisions.poisons. You are a legit Rock Star ⭐️⭐️
How you doing, have you tried tapering?
I lost my husband after a lot of trauma taking care of him for a few years. I went on xanax for 9 months usually about 1.75 mg per day. I've gotten worse and it's not working much. Psychiatrist wants me to up the dose of xanax and tried me on antidepressants. Nothing working because I'm scared of all medicine and i guess i don't take it long enough. My anxiety is out of control, getting more depressed, can't drive very far, out of breath, and very miserable. Any suggestions. I need help desperately!
Thank you so much for this video. This is me on every level. I've been on Xanax for 20+ years and now I am at 4mgs. Which is the max dose. My doctor is not helping me any. So I'm going to slowly ween off and I know it won't be easy. I'm done feeling worthless. I have thought about suicidal. No more pain, no more being dependent on this garbage. No more crying everyday. Is it worth leaving this world? Absolutely NOT! I'm hoping to get through this once and for all! Starting to do things in my life to hopefully make it a little easier to get off these evil pills. Thank you so much for this video and giving me hope!!
You can do it!! talk with your Doctor and make sure to taper with Diazapam for MONTHS or it will be pure hell after 20 years and that dose, it will still be hell but less so, and much safer
I hope you are doing better. I see you commented a month ago. My son is 1 week off Xanax cold Turkey from 5mg/day. It’s very ugly here. I’m an emergency RN and I have to say I’m a little scared for him.
😢 I love you brother I needed to hear this I’m tapering from Valium now I’m down to 9mg from 30mg it’s the only med I have left
What an uplifting video. Most of the videos and comments are so scary and depressing. I am 65 yrs old and been on Ativan for about 15 yrs. I'm bipolar and have been stable for 4 yrs I'm tapering now and haven't had the mind games yet but if I do I don't think I can carry on I can't risk going back to suicide mode. You seem such a positive soul thank you for your comforting message.
Try B3 - isom.ca/wp-content/uploads/2020/01/JOM_2004_19_2_06_Niacinamide%E2%80%99s_Potent_Role_in_Alleviating_Anxiety-.pdf
Very well explained. Thank you for sharing this. Hopefully this will help many souls being trapped in withdrawals.
Thanks for sharing this Phil and can totally relate. I came from an abusive and dysfunctional family and was always anxious. I had my first drink at 13 which made me feel good and continued for years not knowing I was self medicating then one day at 24 it hit the fan with a full blown panic attack and was placed on Ativan which helped greatly but then I felt I needed more and the Dr said he couldn’t and changed me to Klonopin which still taking which helped but feel that’s not working as good and put on additional Buspar. I want to stop all of this but looks like a long journey ahead of me! But thank you again for this amazing and encouraging message, it really gave me hope! 🙏🏽
Wow! What a powerful testimony. Just come out of a wave as of today, I'm nearly at the finish line, I'm down to 1.5mg of diazapam as of last three days. God bless you for your encouraging words.
I don't mean to discourage you... but it took me about 2.5 years to go from 1.5 to zero.... and it was NONSTOP HELL ... it slowly started getting better about 4 months after my taper completely ended...
@Peter I am just speaking the truth.... I lost everything including my 27 year career.... It was BEYOND HELL ON EARTH... for years with ZERO relief... I begged God to kill me constantly ...I couldn't bring myself to commit suicide.. (although I do know of a few going thru this that I spoke to that did kill themselves) .... That is the simple truth... now at about 5 years later.... I am completely healed. Also.... this eas the first drug i had ever taken.... besided penecillin. I was is excellent shape and could run 10 miles without even breathing hard... did pull ups and lifted weights... I was in tip top Marine shape.
@Peter I was on 1mg of Ativan for 2 weeks. When I cut down....all hell broke loose.
@Peter yes.... very short.... And I can say this now.... For some reason.... I am glad it happened to me. It literally showed me how someone can survive something that is literally UNENDING HELL BEYOND WORDS.... I am now stronger in many ways than ever before in my life. It also got me started reading the Bible..... and I have read it 3.5 times since then... and still do daily. Thankfully God didn't kill me..... he saved me. (while I was in the throws of the severe brain damage from the Ativan.... I would have NEVER IN A MILLION YEARS said I was glad it happened to me).
@Peter I took 1mg of Ativan for 2 weeks for insomnia... then I cut down over about 3 weeks...when I got to about .3mg... it got VERY VERY BAD.... and lasted for almost 3 years 24/7 ..... now about 5 years later I am completely healed... WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?????
Hello Phil, what you say is very True! Been on benzos for about 50 yrs and 3 yrs off them completely and in spite of the extremely difficult withdrawal..I still feel better than ever for I am free now.. Thank you for this video for I needed to hear this today. Bless you.
50 Years. You are Amazing. The withdrawal is excruciating. The Gifts after are Freedom and Clarity. God Bless you young lady!
"Once you realize your soul and body and mind have disconnected, You're as sane as can be" - I cant describe how important this fuking insight is to sufferers. Im a doctor who has spent 7 years battling the dysfunction caused by these drugs and the injury after withdrawal and I spent YEARS thinking only about this disconnect and how it works trying to solve it. You cant solve it, you have to weather it, and remind yourself your sane as you do. Thats the correct pathway forward. If your new to this, pls pls pls take away the gravity of this brilliant insight provided by Phil, I dont know Phil and Im not usually charitable with complements, but this blew me away. He articulated something clearly Id been wrestling with for years and it breaks my heart. Ty Phil
You are awesome Phil
Thank you for the video sharing I am 70 years old and have been taking Ativan for more than 20 years and Ambien for probably a couple of years I've seen all the videos about people and their withdrawal symptoms and it makes me think why should I stop and go through that hell
Not everyone goes through this. Talk to your dr
Thanks for sharing your story . I lost my mind & destroyed almost everything in my life . 6 years off diazepam. Don’t feel right ! Get well soon guys .
How long you've been on benzo?
Finally, a truthful video. Probably the best one I’ve seen out of all the ones out there. Thank you! Needed to hear this.
His truth
Thank you for the validation. I am in such hell because of ativan. This made me cry, when you said 'you're not you'. This does make me feel completely crazy and I don't feel like me at all.
try b3 - isom.ca/wp-content/uploads/2020/01/JOM_2004_19_2_06_Niacinamide%E2%80%99s_Potent_Role_in_Alleviating_Anxiety-.pdf
Nobody seems to talk about the extreme physical symptoms, only the mental.
My physical symptoms after SSRI have been extreme and the worst. Can hardly walk and move around. Mostly in bed 13 months off. Will I be disabled for years. Can the physical injury heal?
yes i noticed that too. The mental are terrible but nothing in comparison to being unable to walk, move, or stay alive for years on end in bed, feeling like ur on life support
It took me over 6 months of intense special diet and exercise strategies, but I basically got back to "normal" and have been recovered for over 5 years. Mine involved HIIT (high intensity interval training) combined with intermittent fasting to rev up hormonal growth factors, which I think help regrow the neural links you referred to (GABA).
Colty77 can you share the diet that helps
You are lucky you didn’t have extreme muscle rigidity, contracture, spasm, pulling, dystonia plus severe muscle wasting that is nit related to inactivity.
I would love to be able to even sit or find a bearable position to lie in.
Can you please tell me what you ate
5:55 POWERFUL ⚡️🔥❤️⚡️⚔️
This is the most real video I've seen on this subject, thanks.
In benzo tolerance at present and going through everything you mention. Every thought is intrusive and the guilt I feel about my life, my 2 yr old daughter etc is eating me up. The autumn/fall months seem to make me even worse and I’m stuck at 2.5mg of Ativan but this video really helped today. You probably know how you grab onto any piece of hope. I feel like I’ve lost my mind. The obsession with death and that your time is coming etc. This is so accurate. Thanks for this
@ Phil Eichinger, have you ever heard of Nardil? It's the 'gold standard' for social anxiety, panic attacks, agoraphobia, and ptsd and completely obliterates all anxiety. It's a different feeling from benzos in that you don't even feel it 'kick in'. You are yourself and now you're supposed to be.
how are you doing Jordan ?? stay strong.
@@battosaijenkins946 nardil the anti depressant? That shit has its own side effects and withdrawal syndrome.. stay away from all psych meds IF U CAN!
@@3aeren Meh... its not so bad. In fact the side effects are wayy less than SSRI's, SNRI's, alpha blockers, beta blockers, tricyclics, and even benzodiazepines.
@Wash my soul with words I was given benzo and antidepressant and beta blocker 13 years. Cold turkeyed 15 months back n damaged my whole body n brain. I ve no Hope's I ll heal. I cant feel parts of my body.i really didn't know my psychiatrist was a devil in white coat. Hell to her. I just had anxiety when I was 24 ..now 39 she never told me about these drugs never did I knew about cold turkey infact she kept lying me these drugs r safe. Who is accountable. My wife n family no one believes me none trusts me. I lost my career my frnds relatives everything. I am.left to rott and there will be a day I ll be kicked out of my home n thrown into a rehab. My life is over at 39 considering painful ways to end this agony. Takinh torture from 15 months. I can't do this anymore. My symptoms r left side body weekness numbness lik I got a stroke n it just doesn't go making me difficult to walk pr work. Hell to my doctor I wish I can kill her
Thank you sooo much I just nearly cried, I didn't know what was going on I had the blood, the death,the self loathing, and had 2 go back,on a reduction ended up in hospital thanks,WALES ❤
Thank you for sharing. I chose to take the final dive from pills to plant 2 years ago. It almost killed me but I can gladly say being told my baby is proud of me is the reason I can gladly choose to remain clean!
What is the best way to taper of 2.5 mg of valium at night and 2.5 in the morning. My useless doctor took me off 5mg at night after being on it 5 months. So I was on nothing at night . It was awful last Thurs, severe anxiety crying sweaty
Contact a holistic ( cannabis mostly) Dr and pray. Sorry to say that's the best I got ❤❤❤
Thank you so much. This helps so, so much.
Same. When you ate going through this you feel like you or the only one. And the feelings you have are not normal.
You are amazing. Every one going through benzo withdrawal needs to see this
WOW... You put all my symptoms into words. It's SO HARD to describe.. Very motivational and inspiring! Thank you 💕 God Bless You
Thank you for this🙏🏻 I am in it still and so full of fear and certain my life is ending. Once in awhile I get a window. I meditate, do breathing, try to eat better. I feel so alone and I cry almost all day every day. This gives me some hope. Right now I am with a partner who doesn’t fully understand also. He gets angry when I cry. Because of covid I am more isolated, but have a doctor and a therapist, and online support. Still so sure I am not going to get through this. I pray constantly for miracles. Thank you for this, it helps.
Are you in any fb support groups? I'm not getting long windows anymore. Its terrifying
@@aileenfulgens1909 Yes, there are several facebook groups that are very helpful. Try Benzo Warrior Community.
How are you feeling now since you commented this?
@@amymadden4631how are you now?
Thanks so much you made me cry I’m tapering off Ativan
Thank you for authenticity and sharing ❤️
Hi Phil.. Thanks for this video.. I have watched it about ten times. O boy this is brutal. Please pray for me. I'm in this now. Take care. God bless you. 🌹
Thank you for this video. It's good to here a story of healing rather than just the symptoms
Exactly !
Am withdrawing from both diazepam and tramadol now. It's one month now and I really both anxious and depressed. In fact the has become worse the last two weeks. I have insomnia and terrible days, thinking of death and a terrible days ahead. I also have resistant h.pylori, making me not to eat properly. I liked your video, can you please help me. Thanks
Omar
Tq sir May God bless you.
Great video, I thought I was going crazy, didn't sleep or eat for 4 days, relapsed after 4 days because I couldn't take the withdrawal anymore, but will try again, this video has given me hope that I may make it through to the other side of this one day soon, I hope.
Try to taper man.
This is powerful!
Thank you for sharing your experience and letting everyone know that there is hope on the other side!
Thank you, thank you, thank you soo much. Ive felt like everybody abandoned me completely and reliving ancient memories and reliving thoughts of how I'd failed everybody. Yes I had this weird constant existential dread, terrified in my own house but couldn't pin point why.. Awful. 6 months clear, had insane craving today and it frightened me as I never never want to take poison ever again. The terror of the door. Now that's gone still jumpy a lot, sometimes feels like taking an overdose of cacaine and lsd, a very very bad trip, brain damaged trauma.
I had that fight or flight, butterflies-in-the-stomach feeling 24/7 for over a year from intense anxiety and insomnia. Then I started doing benzos and became addicted for a year. Getting off was a living hell. Thank God I’m ok now.
Hi, How did you get off of them? Im on .5mg clonazapam 6 years. I have those buterflys feel like Dragons though. Inxiety insomnia all that aswwell, i feel like im loosing it. Its taken a tole on wife and kids, about to loose it all😢
@@junior4984 I went into a rehab for 90 days, which my work insurance paid for, thank God! Once there, I went cold turkey off 1mg clonazepam/day. It was horrible, but I was surrounded by caring, supportive people who had been where I was and they helped me through it. I'm almost 8 months off now and am doing really well. I know I'm one of the lucky ones. I wish you all the best in getting off that evil poison.
@@kencabeen7786 Wow thats awsome!!, yes being self employed, w/no insurance, dont have this option😪 Thank you for the reply. Happy for you !!🙏
@@junior4984 Thank you kindly!
@@kencabeen7786How are you now? I hope you feel even more better than you did at 8 months.
Thank you. You give great hope. I Some of the videos make me very afraid. But you show the light at the end of the tunnel. 🤍
Thank you so much for this. I have been tapering slowly and am at 0.04mg v today. I will be walking off in five days at 0.01. I have had mostly waves this month.
Love your optimism Phil, thanks for carrying the water to us.
Ditto
How are you doing now, sir? I'm 4.5 months off now.
@@kristinm3166 definitely better, I needed to make lifestyle changes which included a career change and I'm much happier now.
@@Army1SGRetired how long you were on them and how much mg plz 🥹🥺🙏🏻
Thank you so much for sharing, and your vulnerability. I really needed to hear this-as I’m going on my 8th year of Benzodiazepine Dependency. It has made my life feel like a bad mushroom or acid trip. It’s comforting to know that this is not me... it really does feel like some form of PTSD, the sleeplessness, ruminating, and constant fear. I’m looking forward to better days
You're still on benzos?
@@aileenfulgens1909 Yes
Thanks for the video... Tapering now
I'm 66 years old and 66 months off Ativan prescribed for insomnia caused by menopause. I am suffering so badly. I had a five month window at 3.5 years off and thought I was almost healed...but the last year and a half has been worse mentally...although all the mental crap comes from the insane and weird pain attacks all over my body. I only took Ativan as needed...like 40-50 mg per year and still developed tolerance withdrawal. Doc forced me on several psych meds, that all made me worse in different ways. I'm losing hope. I've wished for death, to die in my sleep because I can't take this torture any more. I convinced my son to move in two years ago otherwise I might have been committed and would've had to find homes for my dog and two cats. My son is leaving soon. I don't know how I can be on my own with constant fear of dying. Nothing breaks the fear except sleep, or the symptoms lift, arbitrarily. It's been over a year since I had a multiday window. I get a few hours in the morning where I can do laundry, play with the dog, make meals to freeze, etc., but so often, no matter what I eat, my stomach and brain start reeling and I'm in bed by early afternoon. Thank you for your frankness. I was looking for hope today. How long did it take you to heal? I've had some spectacular windows but now it's just day after day of torture. Covid sure hasn't helped. My muscles are wasting away from no exercise. Air hunger and rapid heart make it really hard to walk. I used to go to yoga and aquafit but that stopped with covid. I was never addicted, I hated taking it during my misguided taper...i need out of this because it's killing me.
Same here when I eat. Its the worst.
Aileen how r u now
@@sangeetalambh6389 not good. A multitude of new pain symptoms. I can't get out of bed. The terrors are back.
@@aileenfulgens1909 my frd I quit alc take clonazepam 2.5 and qutipen 75 for sleep only 15 days then quit no taper feel disconnection of kknee to thigh and arms 396 days sober
@@aileenfulgens1909 😅
My 31 yr old son has had the prime of his life taken from him. 18 months off klonopin and you have given us hope this torture will end. He is in a wave right now(6 weeks) came out of no where BUT he is improving slowly.
Coming off Ativan and have switched to Diaz to slow taper. It is hell on Earth. I am losing my relationships everywhere and almost my life. I am praying I have the ending you had. I know I essentially have brain damage but the not knowing how long it will take to recover or if I ever will is excoriating while watching my loved ones suffer because of these devil pills. Thanks for the video
All true. Hope u r bettet.
@@tyrel510 good. It is awful that it takes so much time.
@@tyrel510 I'm sorry for the loss of your brother. That is terrible. Yes the akethesia is a nightmare!!!
i needed that,im 2 months clean of valium and by god its rough,crazy thoughts going true my head crazy withdrawals but i aint going back taking them stupid tablets i tell you that,thank you phil you are an inspiration.
The loneliness being in this situation.
It's like fighting a beast which only you can see but is invisible for everyone else around you.
They cant understand.
God bless everyone who is in this situation
Wow. What a great Analogy.. So Right On…
@@tyrel510 Hello My Friend, Healing is a Lifelong process and Lifestyle. I remain living a life beyond my wildest dreams. Still 110% of where I was before this insane journey started. It is out there. Ahead of You. I Promise. I will be doing more videos in the NewYear. My Other. Promise. Merry Christmas.
Thank you so much knowing I am going to be free and happy
HI Phil, thanks for the time to make this video.....so so helpful and reassuring. However I'm only a few months away from 3 yrs and things are still very messy. Suffering terribly. Im still stuck in FEAR mode and totally agoraphobic still. I have tried to break it but it just plagues me all day long with no reprieve. I also still have crazy internal vibrating and bouts of akathisia still. And the thoughts, holy hell....the death obsession is horrific. And some other things like tinnitus and eye floaters. Im getting pretty worn out and just losing hope. Does this shit really end for everyone? Yes some symptoms are definitely gone or lessened dramatically but these big ones still haunt me very intensely. I wont make years more of this shit...its going to be a real battle to make it months or even this Xmas after so so long.
Hang in there brother I read your post I’m suffering too and I am wash for close to five years. Number one you’re not alone I know you don’t wanna be a part of this crowd nor do I but we are. We’re going to heal you just have to believe and give it time.I can’t watch TV at times I can’t listen to the radio sometimes sounds even bother me sometimes. Relationships LOL it’s hard to talk about anything else when you’re consumed in your thoughts so I get it. We’re going to get better just hold on tight listen to what Phil said and let’s keep on going to work.
You probably have an underlying anxiety or depression disorder that needs treating......just quitting benzos doesn't sound like enough. Lots of people use them for chronic anxiety I'd look into safer treatments
I’m Currently encouraging my loved one to pull thru with a Benzo (Ativan) withdrawal within a month under their care . The hospital loaded him up in the stuff & others as well but it’s such a process man ofcourse the guessing games with some doctors is shocking but that’s definitely something I’m learning with the blessing of technology is research as much as you can on your own.
Did slow taper off of K. I jumped at .025 what you say is true. I’m off 9 days. Last night had sweats and night terrors. I’m going to beat this. Thanks for this video.
This is one of the best videos ive ever seen , you are real about it , thankyou
75 days off klonopin, went to rehab, I'm 3wks out and struggling...I was doing so well in "the bubble" but feel like I'm regressing now..but you just helped me keep the faith
Your n inspiration. Pure suffering 29 months so far but gettn a lil better slowly.
I'm in real trouble here. I've been on Benzos for over 15 years-close to twenty. There were a lot of major traumarizing events in my life and I thought I was fine but then started having panic attacks.Some of the most terrifying experience(s) in my life. (remember they brought Tony Soprano to his knees!). I can't even describe them. They're not like anxiety. Anyway, I finally was properly diagnosed and put on an antidepressnat (Paxil/Lexapro) and given Lorazepam - for when one attack starts to happen. Everything was working! Great! But then depression symptoms were getting worse AND thhey never stopped the Benzos. Whether it was a Psych or GP they just kept refiling them. One Psych told me, when I finally started doing research, that it was just Scientologists saying Benzos were bad and not to believe anything I was reading online. Then, when I took an extra couple of pills- when I was having a really bad day- I knew I was going to run out. My GP (I couldn't afford a Psych0 wouldn't even give me two pills. I thought I would be ok because I only took what thhey prescibed (yeah for about ten years now) I had to go to the ER and they reluctantly gave me a couple.My GP started saying 'You kno you're an addict.' WTF? Because of doctors like you! There are more horro stories about missing over a day. Or days where I would literally be up all night, waiting for the pharmacy to open. And I would take one-at the pharmacy- just to feel 'normal' again. Dealing with all of this plus my MDD (caused bt Benzos?) has cost me so much. I've lost everyone in my life.I'm in very bad financial shape, I have no support so stopping is not even an option for me. My brother committed suicide (in another state) and my family. -what;s left (and who don't live here) think I can pray it away. I have no one to pay the bills or help with anything. My boyfriend, friends can't deal with me 9or just feel helpless). I don't have any hope anymore. I'm not even a unctioning adult. I've never been this honest or open online. I'm really scared.
can i tapper of both clonazepam (0.5 mg) & vortioxetin (10mg) have been using for 3 weeks only.. I don't want to stay on these pills which cannot give me relef rather more I'll feeling.. Please advice me n ur support needed 🙏 iam eagerly waiting for ur reply, I don't want to regret in future help me. .
@@khajababu1403 did you ever get off of them ?
how are you getting on, stay strong.
To calm my withdrawal physical part.. so i cannot get up i lay flat on my bed and ask anxiety to show its brutality at max my eyes continuously focused on the roof i stay like that for 1-2 hour and the anxiety the symptoms starts to fade everytime.... My healing process and my way of dealing with the hellfire symptoms is with hellfire.... Poison can cut poison... I have not seen people with my way of dealing not even a percent.... And for lazy people let me tell you my symptoms...
(What I've seen so far 100's but these were horrifying)
Bloodpressure - 170/130 heartrate 165
Spine burning like I've put in the piranha solution
My body feels so bloated like I'm going to explode like a Nuclear bomb
My head feels like demons anger to kill anyone
My body is a spasm machine
I couldn't eat anything like my soul and body working totally differently....
On 6th month today I've mastered the technique so well that even the worst symptoms cannot withstand..
What meds did i quit - klonopin effexor Antipsychotic (all cold Turkey after 4 years daily usage)
I used to get scared as far as i remember from a small stomach ache this made me a monster....
Thank you so much Phil
You are gaining Phil.
I live on the other side of the world and you taking time out too support others, empower other's with hope and light is so beautiful.
Much love
From down under 🥰
Hope there's no spelling errors🤪
Please come back, your hope is amazing
I'm super grateful for this video. I've watched it a few times (6 months in from a cold turkey).
It's like having someone give you a pep talk, who really gets it. My family don't understand and on some level don't believe in withdrawal which makes you doubt yourself.
I have to remind myself these awful feelings are not me and its just my poor brain trying to repair from these toxic drugs. Thanks Phil, you're awesome
how you feeling?
How are you feeling?
Are you healed
Thank you for saying this. ❤
Thank you sir
Thank you for posting this
I'm on my journey day like 75 n I'm tripping but it's getting better.work 12 steps.alot of pulls I stopped after 20 yearslong term mat program n over medicated.lifes good.this video really helped me today;) gonna see a counselour next week hr wk sessions to heal from ripping the bandaid off.good n bad days;)i know it..).its ok to feel crazy.use whatever your higher power is;) life's a trip❤ look thru new eyes.no Mas gabas subs alcohol all at once.jail saved my life.love each other n keep ur head up for those on there journey.forgive urself. new growing
Thank you!!!!!
God bless you Sir!!! Glad I found this tonight!
I really enjoyed your interview with Geraldine Burns on her podcast; thank you!
Thank you, I needed to hear this
I took in 2016 3 months Temazepam and got really sick , now I still have some issues, like tinnitus , about 30 % of my time , and fatique.
God bless you for this video
Thank you! I needed to hear your message. ❤
Was on klonopin for over 27 years. My psych kept increasing the amounts as it would reach a point of no longer helping. There was no info. about it being a short time drug and also how dangerous it is to come off of it. My psych left and got a new one a year ago and said he was not going to keep me on klonopin. I was terrified and went cold turkey. I ended up in the hospital, coded, had multiple seizures. I have so many symptoms now that I am home and trying to pick up the pieces from the waves caused by all this damage. I am seeing my psych and an addiction psychiatrist. Even a pharmacist should have warned me.
Great 👍 thanks for sharing your experiences ❤
Phil ...hi...I keep on reading your reply again and again as I find it so positive in my life frustrating situation. Please help and respond as now what should I do to stabilize my horrible withdrawal symptoms from xanax from the last two months, as you said that due to change in brands or manufacturers, my dose which I had also tapered that time, heads to zero. Should I increase my dose a little bit will help? Please help, I trust you, you will give me a positive mindset and suggest some path so that I can hope to live my life again
Awww Phil. This is awesome content!
Thanks so much for sharing your experience !
Thanks Barbara. Always here to help best I can
Hi Phil! I was on clonazepam 0.75 mg a day for the extreme anxiety that got me into hospital. First two months on clonopin felt really well and I thought then that I am healed. I was so wrong...aftrer two months on it I started having the anxiety back struggled with it although on antidepressant. Went to another hospiral in Moldova where they took ne off of it cold turkey and put me on seroquel another antidepressant and and valporic acid. It didn't work as I went into an insane widraval. I couldn't take it animore and I took 0.5 of clonipin every other day for a week which stabilized me then I went on once a week 0.5 and it was ok for two weeks. When I thought I on the right path the symptoms returned. I took 0.5 of clonopin again but it didn't work anymore. Now I really don't know what to do....Thinking of not taking it anymore at all but very afraid of the widraval. I just can't get through that hell that I went...Any suggestions will be much appreciated as the doctors are oblivious on this matter...
So I had been off K for 3yrs and 8 months when i tried a small piece of an Amanita chocolate bar July 2nd. I felt really loving and amazing while on it. However a couple days later I was severely kindled and back into WD’s. I experienced Anxiety, Depression, insomnia, DPDR, food sensitivity, lost 17lbs in 2 weeks, Vision issues (which I still have some), etc etc. Most symptoms have got better 2.5 months later but still have some blurry vision and depression. I didn’t think this would happen and also didn’t know Amanita is basically the strongest Gaba agonist. Apparently you can still be kindled this far out. Has anyone else experienced kindling like this?
I was taken off Ativan , cold turkey . I now have Akasthisia and really struggling . None of the GP want to listen they call it Anxiety .
Cannabis with high cbd oe just take cbd and it will relieve you
How are you doing now?
Phil... your videos are full of positivity that there is a light at the end of the darkness.
Only two weeks are left for me to finish after 6 months long terrible tapering of Alprazolam.
I find it very rough and feeling horrible mental and physical symptoms at the end. Do you think it's very tough at the end?
Is it this way only? Will it improve and get better after I finish and stop?
Please give your valuable guidance.
Did it Go okay❤?